#the date lasted 45 minutes. i have never hawked down 15 mango habenaro wings so fast.

[fuckmeyer]

hot tip: EXCLUSIVE behind-the-scenes content available to those who livechat my fic to me

#you will learn more about me than you ever wanted to know #(apart from my crippling insecurities and traumas which are WHOLLY evident in text) #DID YOU KNOW?: just like Bella i also shot a man with a bow and arrow 🥰 except i'm currently serving 5 years no parole #jk jk #sadly the Buffalo Wild Wings date was very real #we met on Tinder. (you already know where this is going) #he drove AN HOUR AND A HALF to meet me for the first time #i specifically sent the text 'you really shouldn't drive all that way.' to no avail #i refuse several offers to get picked up for the date. a bitch don't compromise on safety #we get there. we talk about the weather. and the drive. and how much we like Buffalo Wild Wings #he talks about how humanities degrees are worthless. (i was attending a liberal arts school. for an English degree.) #rounded the night off by discussing his favorite social media: 4chan. #he proceeds to explain IN DEPTH his favorite memes and shitposts. this man is verbally illustrating greentexts #oh and BY THE WAY he's christian and looking for a tradwife #the date lasted 45 minutes. i have never hawked down 15 mango habenaro wings so fast. #at the end of the date he went for a kiss. instead i patted him on the shoulder. #i went to my car and waited until he drove away before i went home. #never talked to the guy again #yike #got free wings tho