#there’s a song from the perspective of jesus dying on the cross n he’s like having a breakdown | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

crankysmiles · 7 years

Text

Arguments (Ethan Nestor x reader)

Pairing: CrankGameplays x fem!reader

Genre: angst/fluff

Request: hey if you're doing request can you do a fluffy/angsty thingy with Ethan x reader? I Love your work by the way- your style is rad:)

A/N: Thought I might change up the perspective and have the writing be more... lively i guess? lol i dunno just wanted to try something new, let me know if you guys like it at all :v also sorry it’s kinda long

Did I want to leave the friendship on an argument three years ago?

Well no, I never planned for that to happen. I didn’t plan for any of that to happen! It just... did. Well sure he did tell me he was leaving but I didn’t know how I was supposed to handle that... I mean I was only eighteen. My emotions were on a high rise constantly, so taking that he was moving somewhere to achieve his dreams far away from me wasn’t exactly the best.

If you’re wondering who I might be talking about, it’s Ethan fucking Nestor. My best friend since diapers. Hooked since kindergarten, attached by the hip. Whatever you wanna call our friendship. It doesn’t matter much now considering it isn’t exactly a friendship anymore. It’s complicated and probably the most heartbreaking thing for me since I was also kinda sorta in love with the guy. He was oblivious as hell for years, until I told him.

It was after high school had ended, and he came over to visit. I mostly assumed that he wanted to talk and play video games. We usually did that even if it was something serious. Anyways the guy finally showed up at my doorstep looking distressed and super uncomfortable. For some reason I thought nothing of it and invited him inside, he only stayed by the door with his hands in his pockets looking around awkwardly. He acted as if he’d never even been in my house before, jeesh. I asked him what was up.

“S-sorry I shouldn’t get comfortable... I’ve gotta get uhh... I’m sorta leaving..” The boy stuttered, I sat down on my couch and raised an eyebrow.

“Where are you going?” I grabbed a bag of chips that was on the couch and started munching, waiting for an answer. Ethan tensed up, and looked away.

“Across the country...?” His voice came out low, as if to be expecting some terrible reaction from me or something. I raised both eyebrows now, surprised. Kinda wish he clarified more so I could understand, but I didn’t.

“Oh really? That’s cool.. is it like for the summer or like some trip your dad is making you go on or something. I mean maybe I can tag along or sneak into your car.” I laughed at this and shoved another handful of chips into my mouth.

Ethan spoke up louder this time, “Actually I’m moving there... forever...” I choked at this, spitting out all of the snack food that was in my mouth. “Jesus Christ are you okay??” He took a step forward, obviously concerned. I stood up angrily and went to the kitchen, stomping back out to sweep up the mess. I set down the broom and stomped over to him.

“NO I am not okay, Ethan! My best motherfucking friend is MOVING across the country FOR GODS SAKE!!” I threw my hands up yelling in his face. I hated yelling at him, but how could he do this?? “When are you leaving?” I crossed my arms tapping my foot. “When Ethan??” He stared at me blankly. “Tonight..and h-hey you shouldn’t be so mad about this!! If anything you should be happy for me!” He quickly said, before I could jump back in about him leaving so soon. I laughed bitterly at this.

Doesn’t he understand?

“Oh really? Why should I? Why should I be so goddamn happy about my best friend leaving me so abruptly that I couldn’t at least have tried to savor some of my last moments with him, huh?” Tears were threatening to spill now. He stood silent, looking into my eyes just searching for words to say. Waiting a moment longer I turned away, attempting to go up to my room. I felt his warm hand grip onto my arm and I looked back at him, wiping away any tears that might have fallen.

“Because it’s my dream Y/N... I need your support on this!” He looked at me in a dry way. Ethan looked so angry and I couldn’t take it, I yanked my arm away from him. I stepped back shaking my head. “Ethan I can’t-”

“Well why not?!”

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU... I love you Ethan..” I shut my eyes tightly, not daring to look at him. I let the tears pour down my face but didn’t let any other emotions spill, “A-and not in the best fucking friendship way. I have been in love with you for years.. and you’ve never noticed. I wanted something more.. and now..” I looked to the side, wiping my face once more. “Now I’ll never have that.” I rubbed my eyes intensely, to get the tears to stop, but they wouldn’t. Looking over at where Ethan was supposed to be standing, he was gone.

I saw the door slam shut, and I never saw him after that.

It’s now two years later and I was changed. I had a YouTube Career in singing and the tips of my hair were dyed a deep dark blue. I still haven’t heard or seen anything about Ethan. I was sick of the memories and sick of the people in Maine so I went to L.A. in hopes of starting over. I sat in a park, with a Soprano ukulele hoping to get some sort of ideas for a new song. My apartment wasn’t unpacked and focusing there was basically pointless.

Frustrated and bored, I started strumming the notes to La Vien En Rose and softly sang along. It was something I constantly had stuck in my head, much like a certain boy that I knew. I was soon interrupted by a man with dark hair who was walking a dog, though. Not too sure what I should make of it but oh well.

“You have a lovely voice!” He said smiling wide, I smiled back. “Why thank you... that’s really nice. You have a cute dog.” I said petting it as it panted and jumped around.

“Thanks! Her name’s Chica.” Wait a second, I recognized that name. I looked closer at the man and grinned wider. I knew exactly who I was talking to now, and soon he seemed to recognize me too.

“Hey wait a minute aren’t you that one gamer on YouTube... uhh Mark right?” I stood up and shook his hand, which he returned fondly. Mark nodded his head, “Yeah, yeah! You’re that singing chick also.. uuh Y/N?” I agreed and spoke with him a bit about everything with our channels. Mark was extremely vague about his crew he worked with, I haven’t seen much of his videos either so he invited me over to his offices. I wasn’t exactly sure why but I decided not to question his antics, he seemed nice.

After walking back with Mark and Chica we finally made it to the tiny building. It was nice and cozy and honestly full of life. I met Mark’s girlfriend, Amy, and Kathryn. They were really nice, and another guy, Tyler, showed up, he was pretty nice. But everyone just seemed... off. Sometimes the girls would walk off whispering about something or one of the guys would leave the room to speak on the phone. I awkwardly left to go to the bathroom, but as I was washing my hands I heard a familiar voice. I walked out of the bathroom trying to pinpoint the voice. But then I saw someone at the door.

My heart froze.

Ethan stood there, talking with the crew before looking at me. His eyes widened and mouth dropped. I covered my mouth slightly and let the tears pour down my face, and ran straight towards him practically jumping into his arms. He spun me slightly, laughing. I looked up at him with my hand on his face, wiping away tears, “I-I’m sorry... Ethan I didn’t mean it I’m so so sorry! I wanted to be there for you I just was so angry and hurt and I was alone I-” I was cut off by his soft lips, he kissed me as if to say it was okay. That he was sorry, that he regret it all too.

I could feel it.

He pulled away with both hands on my face, and finally said something back to me after two years.

“I love you too.”

#ethan nestor x reader #crankgameplays x reader #teamiplier x reader #teamiplier imagines #teamiplier

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