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winderlylandchime · 6 months

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Hello, how are you? Hope you’re doing well and that your weekend is/was great. I am here to let you all know that qaf has officially ruined our entire family. While I have been keeping my cousins, my aunt and occasionally my uncle and parents updated on how my brother is watching the show and it’s been keeping us entertained (some of us more than the others). It has finally come to the point where my mom sent me a looooong text message, asking me to take him out since he can leave the house now so that he can (and i quote) ‘get away from the tv gays ruining his life because he needs to be around real people since the world doesn’t revolve around this show’ Basically she asked me to force him to touch some grass. So I did. I asked my neighbor to come with us and we went out to a bar that was having like a throwback night or something (we went bc the songs were old and good) and we hung out and he actually behaved like a functional adult. He even left his Team Brian shirt at home and was talking about random shit and not once did he mention qaf. He was only upset on the car ride there like a little kid but he quickly recovered. And then of course it had to happen, because why wouldn’t it? We were sitting at our table (and i wanna say they have a dj but it was more just a dude with a computer and a playlist and he was killing it) and we were talking and laughing and then as my brother is talking, he just kinda starts almost like glitching, like half talking but he’s clearly distracted and he’s looking off into the distance and my neighbor asks him if he’s okay and he lifts his finger up to shush us and then he goes ‘it’s the song..listen..’ and we’re listening to it and neither of us recognize it so i ask him what song is it? And he goes ‘its the song from prom’ and my neighbor is trying to mess with him so she looks at him and goes ‘Wow cant believe you remember your prom’ and this dude looks at her all annoyed and goes ‘no, not my prom, it’s the song from Justin’s prom’ HE SAID THAT AS IF ITS HIS KID HES TALKING ABOUT. Like Justin is a person that is present in all of our lives and she’s an idiot for not knowing this simple fact. And now I’m confused because i don’t recognize the song! So I’m like ‘no, youre wrong, that song is save the last dance’. And this fucker goes ‘nooooo, this us the song that played when Brian walks in. Before they dance.’ Guys, it was Faded by SoulDecision. I checked when we got home, the song played for just enough seconds for shazam to pick it up. Probably less than 20 seconds. I mean he did watch the episode few days ago and he has the song on his playlist BUT the bar was LOUD AS FUCK with people. We weren’t sitting anywhere near the speaker so it even took me a second to hear the beat/melody of the song and this moron heard it from a distance and recognized it because Brian fucking Kinney walked into a scene while the song was playing. I feel like i am being beaten at my own game.

I am surprised that afterwards he didn’t do anything dumb or embarrassing ngl. But that alone made me realize that he is a lost cause forever now. I’m kinda proud ngl. But yeah, this weekend he was literally forced to touch grass, so to speak and even then qaf found a way into his life.

Your mom said he needs to touch grass. Oh my god. (The world doesn’t revolve around this show? News to me!)

And then they played the random song from prom at the bar. The universe is sending your brother a message! I’m dyinggggg. I remember one of the first fics I ever read in qaf, which was written before shazam, where the author could not figure out what that damn song was. And your brother is recognizing it in a busy bar.

He may not know it yet, but he’s a tumblrina!

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

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cognitiveleague · 10 months

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Hey, y’all! I’m even broker than usual, so fuck it. A… commissions post of sorts? But for random shit I’m good at, organized loosely from most practical to most deranged.

So let’s get to it! In case this post makes it to someone outside of my mutuals, hi, I’m Ket (she/her), and my wife Thyme (they/them) and I are veteran Tumblrinas of many a year. We live with our two beautiful, incredibly stupid cats, Tabitha and Umbra.

I wrote a whole thing here about how hard we work (well, not the cats) and the reasons why we’re still struggling, because that’s how I Need Money posts usually go, and then I deleted it, because honestly, we’re pretty much all having a bad time under late-stage capitalism, and beyond not wanting to guilt trip anyone, I don’t want to waste anyone’s empathy on all the exhausting details when so many of us are already so tired and so overextended emotionally and/or financially.

Tl;dr - Late stage capitalism sucks for us (as it does for many), no money in bank, week until payday, need money because existing is expensive.

What I can offer in exchange for money if anyone’s interested: under the cut to save space on your dash!

-Translation: Japanese to English, English to Japanese, French to English (but not vice versa at this time unless you’re willing to accept that the end result may be pretty clunky and stilted), could probably drag my wife in if anybody wants Swedish to English or vice versa? Pricing variable depending on amount and complexity of text involved, can provide a somewhat-negotiable estimate on request.

-Informal consultation on (US) health insurance: My day job involves dealing with my workplace’s patients’ health insurance companies. I have an active vendetta against all private healthcare companies and detailed knowledge of how they work, and am personally invested in helping as many people as possible not get screwed by them, so honestly, if I had time and didn’t need money, I’d do this one for free. I’d probably have to draw up some type of waiver / information privacy policy for it, like you’d have to sign for any sort of financial advisor who gets paid for it, but if there’s interest I totally will. I can look at your healthcare plan options and tell you which one would make the most sense to pick, or advise on the best plan of action for making your existing bullshit insurance company fix something they screwed up, for example. Pay what it’s worth to you.

-Editing: I’ve got years if not decades of experience with fiction and academic writing, and a sharp eye for detail. I’m also experienced with writing letters and emails in a business context. Got something that needs a once-over for errors? I can help! I am also happy to just straight-up write letters or emails for any context, or really just about anything that isn’t academic writing (which I can still help revise or edit, but if you want someone to write your whole damn paper for you, find someone willing to do it.) As with translation, pricing depends on amount and complexity of text, can provide an estimate if you tell me what you want.

-Short-form poetry: I said what I said, and you know, I’m not even embarrassed somehow. Pay what you will, and you can have your very own bespoke haiku (in Japanese and-or English) for any occasion and/or theme you want. Hell, if you want, and if “what you will” covers at least enough for materials and postage, I’ll clear off the coffee table, dust off the calligraphy set, personally cry tears of frustration from my own eyeballs for you as I try to remember how to grind my own ink, and mail you a physical copy.

-Assorted Renfaire Bitch Skills: I did fencing and reenacting until I busted my leg, and have for many years worked weekends at a clothes shop at my local renfaire during the season when it runs. Also my Tolkien and Shakespeare and golden age of piracy phases just never went away. Want practical advice on writing or choreographing m a swordfighting scene? Want a shitpost (or anything else) translated from 20th-21st century English to period-accurate Tudor-era English? Want me to design a medieval-to-renaissance-inspired outfit for you or your OC with whatever level of accuracy or inaccuracy you want? Want me to write a scathing diss sonnet for someone your party’s bard hates? ALL THIS AND MORE CAN BE YOURS - I pray you, seek out with all haste my DMs

-Assorted Renfaire Butch Skills: Autocorrect was really pushing for this one, and I’ll grant it this win. As above, but I’ll tie my hair back and wear a doublet.

-Cat pics: Self explanatory. I will send you photos of our beautiful, brainless cats to brighten your day. Pay what you will, and I will decide how many stupid cat pictures it is worth.

Send me a DM if you want to engage my services for any of the above, and we can talk what kind of price would be fair! Reblogs appreciated, too 💕

#commission post #sort of - just not for art?#reblogs welcome

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