#watch waterloo (1970) instead of napoleon (2023) btw

[proosh]

"Averse to all forms of cowardice?" I'm actually convinced you have no idea who you're talking about. One of France's defining character traits is that he's a coward. You sound like a fake fan.

Anon, and anyone else who's reading this, look. I'm really sorry for the tone the rest of this reply is about to take. You see, I'm someone who's very much about curating one's personal internet experience, and an advocate for mutual respect and sensibility in regards to fandom matters. I'm all about encouraging differing interpretations and analyses of characters, even if I don't necessarily agree or understand it's all a matter of perspective and if I'm not a fan of something? I ignore it, simple. I likewise expect the same sort of understanding from other participants in fandom: If I am posting things that is not to someone's taste, they can simply ignore me or block me to curate their personal online experience. You know, like civil people within a public forum.

However, you've decided to come to my inbox, on this wretched day after I have just been subjected to two and a half hours of the worst Napoleonic cinema experience the human mind can possibly conjure, to tell me that I am a "fake fan" over a silly little shitpost? Are you on crack? Is it crack you're smoking? Because, my good bitch, you will find it is you who is the fake fan.

For example, we've got literal direct canonical evidence of France being, like, incredibly and unfathomably enthusiastic about the idea of getting to go to war with the English again, specifically saying that being at peace feels like he's been "crammed into a fake version" of himself. I'm sorry, it really doesn't get more explicit than that. Look, it's not a headcanon I believe in, but that's okay. You do you! I'm happy for whatever interpretation you have! I will not be the one sending pissy little anons about it, I promise! You're welcome to block me if this is something that is incompatible with your fandom experience! Go for it! Please!

But, sure, maybe direct canon depiction isn't enough to defend the thought process as to my personal interpretation. I'll put this under the cut since I'm invariably getting long-winded, but let's have a quick fun lightning-round overview of French history and culture in regards to their collective bloodthirst and warmongering that doesn't really lend itself to an interpretation of 'cowardice' as a concept that's strongly represented within the French national identity (at least in my opinion);

The French have, for about a thousand-odd years, been heavily associated with an unusually bellicose, honour-bound, chivalric, warmongering ideal, to the point their ongoing national anthem is quite literally about murdering people and watering the fields with blood!

Historian Niall Ferguson argues that France is the most belligerent military power in history!

Literally over a million men were fed into the meat grinder of World War One! Literally an entire generation! Approaching 5% of the entire population!

One of the last bayonet charges in history was performed by the French! In 1995!

Their ongoing nuclear doctrine is one of the pants-shitteningly insane ones on the planet, and scared the piss out of the Soviets - Which is to say, they will happily drop a nuclear weapon on an enemy city as a warning shot! And they'll do it, too, because they keep refusing to sign nuclear arms treaties!

Their population is entirely and consistently prepared and ready to implode their own country and governance at the first sign of any infringement upon perceived civil and social liberties!

If you've read this far, anon, congratulations! I hope you can better understand the reason why I interpret France the way I do! If you disagree with me, you're welcome to come off anon and meet me at the Champs-Élysées at dawn so we can duel to the death over our incompatible opinions like true respectable gentlepeople of honour and class. Or you can just block me and not bother me again.

It's totally up to you, buddy!

#sorry to everyone for this i've decided to take the french nuclear doctrine to heart and just go apeshit #anon! please go away! fuck off! block me! #watch waterloo (1970) instead of napoleon (2023) btw #just to clarify this isn't to shit on anyone's opinion or interpretation! #genuinely. do what you want. idc. #what am i. a cop? go. be free. stop sending pissy anons over fake anime country boys. #from the askbox