#which is entirely unrelated to how I dealt with all the mockery and lectures and disrespect 😙

[dykeredhood]

I think I’m still trying to unwind from physically (and mentally) convulsing after receiving a friendly text from my coworker yesterday morning

#everything she said was completely fine it’s just the phrasing she used rocketed me back to a really terrible mental spot #and on the one hand it’s fucking hilarious because what she literally said was: #‘Just wanted to check in and see how you're doing.’ #which is nice!! that’s a very kind thing to say to your friend #but aside from my weird mental state these past few weeks #(memories etc. surfacing that I haven’t worked through at ALL but I thought I’d at least repressed them well enough) #my track record with people coming to me with ‘just checking up on youuuu 🥺’ (and slightly less often) #‘I’m doing this because I have your best interests at heart’ is Very Bad #when people send me messages like that unprompted I brace myself for a *LITERAL* #hours long lecture of being talked down to and stripping my agency by way of many helpful ‘suggestions’ #read: demands that if I don’t comply with them; my belongings will get thrown in the dumpster and I’ll be made fun of the entire time #my early 20’s were so fun ✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️ #also flavored Absolut is still 80 proof (other brands’ flavored vodka is usually like 70 proof) #which is entirely unrelated to how I dealt with all the mockery and lectures and disrespect 😙 #this got away from me #personal #rant in tags #depending on how much housework etc. i get done this afternoon I might also go into recent interesting gender feelings #we’ll see how besotted I am by then lmao