#xenogears lb | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

monsterqueers · 2 years

Text

Semi-Liveblog of Xenogears

Finally getting around to this crunchy 1998 jrpg, watching it on youtube because ive been told the UI and game mechanics are really ass in places, this will be copypasted from my carefully largely spoiler free discord ramblings to my platonic partner in batches so no spam.

I know a few spoilers for this that were specifically why I wanted to witness it- IE that I can ‘Same Neurotype!’ a character, and its Really Dark. The Mindfuck stuff goes without saying its the monolithsoft staff.

Copypaste from last night under the cut

Ohhh man the screen resolution and menu sound effects very crunchy ps1 shit The low res anime&cgi cutscenes with 90s dub voices... -chefs kiss- Very crunchy Man I think I recognize this fucking random extras voice.

(...)

but the dubbing pool of voices in 98 was pretty small so chances are I HAVE heard it but oh man this is a tense moment and the VAs sound like they are discussing the weather this is great

-juicy Space Bullshit happening- Some dude: Im evacuating the ship (said like im ordering coffee)

The graphics are pretty impressive for the ps1 I think. The cgi is hysterical tho Im sure it looked better on a crt tv because the spacing and blurring or the lights makes the shading look less fucky on a lot of older stuff The detail on the 2d animation is really good tho for a ps1 anime custscene

oh naked lady dubiously censored naked lady yes this is a xeno game there must be boobie. Contextless boobie Oh man now I gotta read a lot of white text on black screen lol but the music is nice never heard it but it sounds nostalgic 'look at this cute village with cute music!' ok 'it is now on fire!' That sounds about right oh my fffuninkg god that screen transition windows movie maker shit ohhh yes this is good the screen is still wobbling and flashing oh lord the eyestrain lol

First thing the protagonist does is swear we are getting off to an excellent start Awwwe he paints thats cute

oh god the iu direction hud THATS AWFUL(complementary) thats very 90s 00 Weird Shit Before They Codified Whats Expected With A Hud design

Fei(Protagonist) has a sparse room with just a fuckton of art supplies in it where he seems to be only drawing self insert fanfic lol. Hes got his priorities in order. oh man that low poly cow

They did good to make a fully 3d 'move the camera around' game in 98, as low poly as it is I can see the 'sort of squeezing out everything you can out of the game engine' effort that went into xc1 in this

This girl and also this whole village totally has death flags I can smell it on them they are to happy and cosy Fei dodging conversation he doesnt wanna have like Naked Dunban

Oh what the shit you can talk to an npc while you talk to another npc??? lmao CRUNCHY gameplay that sounds like you can cause problems for the ui and fill the screen with textboxes I hope they thought of that and don let let you endlessly add more text boxes this town music really sounds like music ive heard a million times before for hours but I know ive never played this game maybe its background music for some video essayist or something very cosy tho

KITTY OMG IF YOU TALK TO THE CAT IT MEOWS??? CAT SPOTTED AND IT IS ALSO GREEN FOR SOME REASON KITTY KITTY they better not kill the cat (they will probably kill the cat) you can make him(the protagonist not the cat) jump in a well for no reason lol OH PUN "'well' done! you found an item!" "Alls well that ends well." Ok this is a good localization

'bearcows' Oh so that isnt a cow its some fucked up chimera thing oH GOD ITS MOUTH OPENS LIKE A BEAR GOT IT OK

its got canines..... This animal is almost certainly one of the most dangerous.... Bulls kill so many people every year and this one has TEETH

'We got -list of a bunch of combo fruits and veggies- and turnips!' turnips, the universal constant I guess

no dont drink fertilizer fei apparently drinking miracle gro will heal you Dont Worry About It

The space lazer sounds for messing around in the menu lol

There is just no combat tutorial AT ALL HA oh hes got voice acted lines in battle lol!!! Thats a higher voice than I expected

completely incomprehensible battle hud fans really werent lying there it is Super Crunchy Can barely read this lol and at the speed the person playing is buzzing through it I cant tell if its turn based or not Dont know what that bar is either I THINK its turn based with a time limit? Yeah seems to be Head so hard you can kill a wolf by headbutting it I guess sorry its a two tailed jackal lol thats cool monster design tho

its a chicken in the house how cute! -talks to the chicken and it makes a horrible staticky noise- ah Fei, while pleasant bg music plays: hm wonder where the doctor is :) -explosion noise- -all music stops-

found him!

Ah yes For No Particular Reason This Is Shaped Like A Cross And Has A Winged Person Statue In It

This game is under NO CIRCUMSTANCE epilepsy or motion sickness friendly lol

Also yes the windows movie maker wobbly screen effect is EXACTLY what dissociation feels like thats right.

Knowing the special spoiler that I do about this game makes this part unintentionally funny. Dude its your alter. Crack ur plural egg. The childs VOICE ACTOR OH MY GOD LMAOOO OOF Things are already going ‘fun’ directions

Oh I think im getting whats going on with combat, you do fucking button combos in your turn??? is that whats going on? Oh GOD the platforming..... Oh thats the real content warning for this game.... Oh wow. Thats really bad. oh! Is that a conlang or another real language I cant tell its cool has anyone tried to make a language bible for it if its a conlang? conversations like Fei: If ur gonna kill me at least try to aim for the vitals attempted murderer: What The Fuck We finally get a full name for our protag! Rejoice! HAHAHAHHA OH MY GOD WHO IS THE MCS VOICE ACTOR LMAO OH MY GOD THIS IS VERY MUCH EARLY DUB HMGJFDjgh

oh hey his va was an extra in avatar the last airbender

The voice cracks in the kid version of the character ohhh my god this is excellent horrible 00s english dub

the music is really good though very nice atmosphere

Yeah it seems to be different button presses use some energy on the bar and you combo them in an attempt to puzzle that together for your turn with some combos being special and will do lots of damage or something???

Also you can really hear the music vibe being very xenoseries. Them violins set to mental break downs <3

'the lip synch in xc2 is bad' Observe Xenogears Lip Synching in the anime cutscenes Oh man its Bad Lip Synching (in a good way)

wow thats a lot more blood than theyd get away with in a t rated game today! well its 2d so probably actually thats fine but

Jesus christ Feis english VA is unintentionally hilarious Its a 14 year old anime boy voice and hes Beefy Like it would be one thing if it was a good 14 year old boy voice, but it sounds like a grown man trying(badly) to do a 14 year old boy voice for a beefy man which is why its funny good thing hes mostly crying and screaming in the cutscenes and not talking

Random t rex in a xeno game we meet again!

LMAO deus es helicopter

Dropkicking sharks in the desert... Yes. Normal activities

Ahhh yes, time for the talking about god again! This is a xenogame AND a jrpg after all. Gods are hunted for sport. I think I kinda like the 1.25 speed versions of some of these songs more than the regular version but that might be because ive now listened to them that way for 2 hours

Oh yeah this is a game that if you played high would be a very bad time. Some real mindfuck shit is happening (complementary) HIM! The dude the internet really likes! Blonde himbo spotted! BART XENOGEARS,,,

wow the doctor guy can do a full split his wife must like that

HHHEXCUSE ME???!?! Word for word quote: 'Is there anyone who is almost dead, with no arms and legs, or in need of an abdominal operation!? No one...? Well that's depressing..."

LMAOOOO We found a dude in a cave who doesnt believe in evolution and thinks space aliens brought humans to the planet and hes probably right lets be real this is a jrpg. (edited) Guy In A Cave: -proceeds to belt out straight up bible stories when asked about what ‘myth’ he believes in- Ok this is a xeno game he is almost certainly right if hes yelling about god

Just three dudes in a cave, two himbos with hair past their ass and an old man yelling about god and his skull collection. Lovely.

There is one brain cell in the party and our other guy has it who isnt in the party right now. We are talking to the old dude. We should not be talking to an old dude who collects human skulls even if he is friendly but thats just me

This customization menu is atrocious oh wow INCREDIBLE,,,

Wow Bart really is proto-Zeke from xc2 no wonder xenofans are rabid for himbos. WHY must the customization window zoom to the asscheeks of the not-gundams every time you refuel them What, are we piping fuel up the robots asshole? Is that whats happening?

Oh new himbo is kind to children no wonder people think hes husband material lol

-insert 'sand is coarse and rough and gets everywhere' star wars joke here- also new guy has pirate music and pirates are cool so like.

its a fucking prOJECTOR HEHEHEHEH LIke the ones that project light on a viewscreen from above omg you can taste the 00s

Man I can see exactly why xenogears people are so obsessed with Bart. Pretty, beefy, friendly but distinctly weird to mildly unhinged, pirate-cowboy-prince, whips. wait a minute wait a minute. Robots, mindfuckery, sad protagonist who Doesnt want To Get in The Robot.... When did NGE come out old on- I thought so it came out in ‘95 I feel this is a bit of a love letter to NGE

omg omg Bart does a little hopping animation when hes excited thats adorable

does... does this bad guy really just straight up have a giant cross tattooed on his face??? Theres heavyhanded symbolism and then theres whatever that is (edited)

ok I have to stop watching these and go to bed but thots so far: - The fandom darling is as good as advertised. Excellent man lemmie give him a headpat I want to eat him like a croissant. - Charming and Weird And Fucked Up in equal measure which is good - You can smell the crunchy 90s sci-fi emanating from this game(complementary) - The music sounds deeply nostalgic like ive heard it for hours a million times before but ive 100% never heard any of this game. Good stuff. - I am intrigued how the funny 'jump in the well' gag has progressed from funny pun hole with items in it if you jump down it a few times into using a well to sneak into some shitheads lair and unkidnap a little girl. Wonder if this is gonna keep being a thing.

#xenogears #liveblog #wayward rambling #xenogears lb #theres some spoilers in here ig

5 notes · View notes