tardigrade-train

[tardigrade-train]

Tumblr on the Seven Seas

🏴‍☠️ white-beard Follow

Can we stop all normalising the use of "sc*rvy" as a fun little thing to call people?? I literally had sc*rvy last year and it was even worse than when I got my hand cut off. Fuck anyone who uses the S word without even considering how triggering it can be to those of us who have ACTUALLY suffered though it

🌅 castedaway Follow

No wenches?

🏴‍☠️ white-beard Follow

Honestly you people are so insufferable I genuinely hope you walk the plank

🌅 castedaway Follow

AHOY???

🍑 plundermebooty Follow

Okay but OP is literally a landlubber, mateys

🌴 pegmeg

nahhh why is it literally always landlubbers faking scurvy and sending plank threats ☠☠

768 notes

🗡wagscallion Follow

everyone says "land ho!" but never "land ma'am"

💨 matelotsaboteur

Really makes you think

2,041 notes

💃 crossdressing101 Follow

this whole crew was so gullible ngl, i just cut my hair and dressed in my fathers clothes and they all fell for it, hook line and sinker??

💃 crossdressing101 Follow

honestly im surprised no one has found me out yet. surely i dont seem that much like a man? i mean it makes this way easier but like. im still a woman. obviously

🕺 crossdressing101 Follow

mateys i have come to a shocking realisation,

34 notes

⛵ privatesteer Follow

wildest argument for piracy i've ever heard was that the gold stored on government ships is dangerous cause it weighs them down, so they're just 'lightening the load'

🧜‍♀️ kiss-pretty-ocean324 Follow

աaռռa ʟɨֆȶɛռ ȶօ ֆɨʀɛռ ֆօռɢ?

⛵ privatesteer Follow

no thanks

🕶 monstermaterdeactivated16520210

outta my way gayboy im boutta get it

🕶 monstermaterdeactivated16520210

i have drowned at sea

36,251 notes

⚓ shiveringtimbers Follow

14,811 notes

🌏 boat-enthusiast Follow

i am SO sick of the term "ship-shape" like, matey, which shape?? Ships come in so many fucking shapes like have non of you ever boarded more than one vessel in your career???? Anyway fake ship fans DNI with this post i can NOT be bothered with your tomfuckery today

💦 longjohngolder Follow

girl its not that deep ☠

🌏 boat-enthusiast Follow

to YOU. i just get it

1,147 notes

🙍‍♂️ dudeindistress Follow

honestly being held for ransom isnt that bad. kinda nice to be held

4,733 notes

🦜 pollypockets Follow

SQUAWK

🐦 aviated Follow

CAW SQUAWK SQUAWK

🦜 pollypockets Follow

CA-CAW

790 notes

🍑 plundermebooty Follow

the cabin boy just winked at me?? after offering to help clean my gun? privately. in my quarters. tonight.

🍑 plundermebooty Follow

i think i hauve scurvy

142 notes

🌊 swabmydick Follow

mateys I SWEARR my captain and his first mate are gonna kiss before our next voyage. they literally have so much romantic tension every time i see them its nauseating

🕶 longjohngolderdeactivated16511205

wtf its so problematic and harmful to ship real people?? unfollowing rn i thought you were better than this

🌊 swabmydick Follow

i literally rob and kill people for a living?????? that's where you draw the line???

🌴 pegmeg

op killed them

🌊 swabmydick Follow

even better news mateys, they kissed ☠☠☠

96,538 notes

#fake post #amazing

[tardigrade-train]

you're going about your normal day when, suddenly, surprise! you've been pokémon mystery dungeon'd!

unfortunately, due to budget cuts, the pokémon assigning quiz has been canceled. instead, you must spin THE WHEEL, assigning you a random, unevolved, non-legendary and non-mythical pokémon. you must now go on some sort of world-saving adventure as this pokémon. good luck!

tell me in the tags what you rolled, and how you feel about it - for bonus points, you can spin the wheel again for (or just take your pick of) a pokémon to be your partner.

bonus rules:

you're not shiny unless the wheel tells you you're shiny

take your pick of regional forms and evolutions (for example, if you roll vulpix, it's up to you whether that means normal or alolan vulpix)

apply whatever logic you like with regards to gender

have fun and be yourself!

#DRIFLOON #GHOST. POKEMON CHOSEN BWABWABWA

[tardigrade-train]

I want emo versions of idioms

Like, instead of ““you’re barking up the wrong tree” it’s “you’re panicking at the wrong disco”

[tardigrade-train]

Okay here’s one for what character are YOU (instead of who’s ur bestie)

#uquiz

[tardigrade-train]

Queen of Crete overrules her husband and raises their new son normally, prince turns out real okay actually.

[tardigrade-train]

I have a question for the fanfic writers among you: How do you treat your work in progress when a very similar story is put out there? Do you go on writing - in the spirit that everything is unique in its own way - or do you abandon the piece - in the spirit of preventing 'superfluous' contributions?

Let's add a further wrench into the process by saying the recently published work by another author, so similar to your own, seems so much better written than your own (granted we are always our own worst critics). Where do you go with that?

Maybe this is a question for readers, too. Do you mind reading similar works/story lines?

[tardigrade-train]

Just checking.... We all pronounce Miette like My-TAY in our heads, right?

[tardigrade-train]

[tardigrade-train]

its crazy growing up and realizing how deranged everyone is and how many problems everyone has. in such mundane ways. your waiter at olive garden believes in q anon. the woman doing your x ray just moved in with a guy she met a week ago. your insurance agent is a hoarder. etc.

[tardigrade-train]

"kill them with kindness" wrong. fall inside a hole you couldn't see 🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳🕳

[tardigrade-train]

tumblr poll simulator

[tardigrade-train]

[tardigrade-train]

[tardigrade-train]

This is Team ZITS. To me

[tardigrade-train]

Twilight Princess link: oh man i sure am lost in this dungeon, if ONLY thete was some sort of way to magically warp out of here

The magic boob chicken creature in his pocket:

[tardigrade-train]

canon 👍

[tardigrade-train]

Guinea Pigs Eating a Grass Field