thebeautifulsoup

[thebeautifulsoup]

there should be a Sisyphus emoji

[thebeautifulsoup]

Henry Kondracki (British, 1953), Casablanca at the Cameo, 2023. Oil on canvas, 102 x 122 cm.

[thebeautifulsoup]

she commit acts of intercourse on my erogeneous zones until i achieve sexual climax

[thebeautifulsoup]

As with the horse poll, please regard these options as sliders. The extent to which each one deviates from 1/6th of the total will determine the amount that canine aspect deviates from the "average."

I will draw the dog we make. :)

[thebeautifulsoup]

#big #don't really think there's any way to spin an F cup

[thebeautifulsoup]

No none of the above this is for the wine enjoyers

#red medium but i do like a full bodied also #if forced to white wine dry please

[thebeautifulsoup]

how?? just how?

#fuckin chocolate guy

[thebeautifulsoup]

i love when a man is fresh of getting his ass beat. it’s like a pregnancy glow

[thebeautifulsoup]

My new embroidery to hang over my work desk by happyeight

[thebeautifulsoup]

Babies drop their pacifier and look at you like “ah lads” as if remembering what they had to do to survive the Battle of Culloden

[thebeautifulsoup]

I'm like if a chivalrous knight kissed a fair maiden's hand and said "my lady, I fight for you" and then walked off and immediately tripped over his own armor and fell on the ground

[thebeautifulsoup]

#as long as it's not scuttling about on my bed then I'll leave it alone #if it is scuttling about on my bed I'll politely move it away #I'm in the uk and we don't have any venomous ones

[thebeautifulsoup]

we visited a national wildlife refuge yesterday and this flooded interpretive sign, so faded and weathered that was completely illegible, had such a mournful air that I had to photograph it.

#at first i didn't realise what it was and thought it was a diving platform for ducks or something

[thebeautifulsoup]

the ache of nostalgia

#Youtube

[thebeautifulsoup]

fuck it. post gustave doré octopus blowjob

[thebeautifulsoup]

✨ Please reblog the polls to make them reach out to as many people as possible, but KEEP IT SPOILER-FREE to make people listen to the music with an open mind 💖 Artists and titles will be revealed after the poll's conclusion, check the original post for an update! ✨

#this is the first time I've ever heard this actual song! #I've only other heard the little bit that is clipped in [meme]

[thebeautifulsoup]

Honestly thought I'd never hear the word "usborne" again. My mom used to live and breathe that company, and while I certainly don't regret a fair chunk, I do find it amusing as I look back now. I legitimately thought it had fallen off faster than Juice+.

In reference to a post where i mention my kid has the usborne “see inside germs” book.

So if people don’t know, usborne is a weird publishing company that has done indispensable books for British children for generations; they’re in every library, school and nursery, and have shelves devoted to them in every bookstore. They are how many people learned to read, and are the originators of many hyper focuses. They’re famed for doing educational lift the flap books for all ages, like “see inside your body”, as well as as the ubiquitous touch-and-feel series, “that’s not my….” In which a mouse comments improbably on various creatures not being their creature. “That’s not my dragon,” the mouse says, inviting you to stroke a dragon with a patch of fur on it, “its tummy is too soft. That’s not my dragon,” on the next page, where the dragon’s ears are lined with textured paper, “its ears are too bumpy.” This seems like such an inefficient way to find one’s missing dragon, a fact that simmers underneath you through endless repetition. Why does the mouse own so many things (pirates, ducks, polar bears) and why is it interrogating other people’s pirates etc by feeling their legs.

At any rate, turn a parents’ house upside down and these books fall out.

Which is why it’s completely hilarious that they are also an MLM.

Well. Kind of. In the old school sense. It’s less about signing up a pyramid scheme and more about getting a random citizen to buy a crate of perfectly popular books and try to sell them on from their home. It’s very traditional for Mums On Maternity Leave to do this. Pre-social media and online ordering, they’d hook up other mums at toddler group. Today, they post awkwardly on social media. The idea is that buying from another parent is cheaper than the bookstore, and they get to keep the markup. They get intense about things, and I believe they attend conferences. Nobody makes a huge amount of money and it’s unclear how undercutting local bookstores is helpful; it’s also basically the same RRP as Amazon I think.

And the books are perfectly respectable and sell perfectly well in bookstores.

So. Like. This marketing scheme is completely weird. Why?? Why does it still exist? People buy the books normally! You don’t need to promote them aggressively! You don’t need elaborate independent local middlemen schemes! You can just buy them! I have never understood this. I just file it under one of those weird mat leave hustles.

But don’t worry OP. They’re still going. They’ll never stop. The thing is that your mom got bored and online sales probably ate whatever residual profit margins were left and it’s probably very liberating for everyone to grow out of the “that’s not my cow” stage, but Usborne books are going strong.

#as a school librarian i absolutely vouch for usborne books they have spme brilliant non-fiction for the 8+ range #which is shockingly difficult to find actually #and i had NO IDEA ABOUT ANY OF THIS #no idea they were Literary Tupperware