uniquezombiedestiny

[uniquezombiedestiny]

i like when ventposts self censor in a way thats completely incomprehensible to anyone else like 'im so sick of ****** ******* ******' . im sorry that youre going through it. can i buy a vowel

[uniquezombiedestiny]

stop naming your pets after anime characters i just had to ask this person "are killua's testicles enlarged?"

[uniquezombiedestiny]

[uniquezombiedestiny]

[uniquezombiedestiny]

Nelly ryoshu doodles because bfndnfkdjfkfbekfbkdndjfndnfmdnfnfjfndkfjf

[uniquezombiedestiny]

Am I getting a good grade in tumblr mutual?

[uniquezombiedestiny]

I never told my wife I had an ex-fiancee 

One thing I never told my wife is that I had a fiancee before her. It’s a long story, so buckle up.

It was the year after I graduated college. I was dating my girlfriend, Stephanie, for a couple years and things were getting serious. At the time, I had my roommate, Joey, but he was a Craigslist roommate. We didn’t know each other very well. If you asked me how I knew him aside from Craigslist, the answer is I didn’t. He wouldn’t even tell me where he grew up.

Now, no shit, on the day I was going to propose, tragedy struck. I adorned our apartment with candles and even set up a nice glass display with framed pictures of me and Steph on top. Before Steph came in, Joey walked in and tripped. He actually shattered the glass display and got some in his face. Steph came in a few minutes later as I was on the phone with 911. Fortunately, Steph is a nurse, so she was able to patch him up as the three of us went to the hospital together.

Joey would recover, but he had some issues with glass on his face. He needed some cotton gauze inside his eye, which fortunately the doctors were able to save.

Clearly, I put off my proposal for the time being, but Steph and I agreed to get married. Our engagement was hush hush. Steph’s hours were wonky so she took care of Joey when I wasn’t around. And I should’ve seen the red flags, but I ignored them. They’d hang out together with and without me. They’d be in Joey’s room and lock the door.

One day, I came home and all of Joey’s stuff was gone. He moved out. Steph wrote a note. The note said, “We fell in love and we’re leaving together. Don’t try to find us.”

I didn’t listen and I searched, but true to the note, I couldn’t find them. I’ll never know what happened.

Suffice to say,

if it hadn’t been for Cotton-Eye Joe

I’d have been married a long time ago.

Where did you come from, where did you go?

Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe?

[uniquezombiedestiny]

early fallen london is so funny because youre in a constant state of being at like. one (1) echo and going "IM RICH"

[uniquezombiedestiny]

clownfish be like "i know a spot" and take you to a fucking deadly sea organism

[uniquezombiedestiny]

[uniquezombiedestiny]

I was just grocery shopping and for a while I was in line behind the peak possible combination of parent and child, here is my 1 minute recreation from memory

[uniquezombiedestiny]

One thing that's vitally important to remember is that feeling ''weirded out'' is not a form of harm. It is a completely normal part of socializing. It is the feeling of encountering something unfamiliar. In order to be a kind person, you must learn to how to distinguish between "harmful" and "weird." And then you must accept the weird.

[uniquezombiedestiny]

New fallen London oc: canadian zailor who calls it the Unterzed

[uniquezombiedestiny]

Mythbusters have 3 categories of myths

the general public doesnt know how physics works

the general public doesnt know how lying works

oh crap this ones real

[uniquezombiedestiny]

something horrible will happen tonight

[uniquezombiedestiny]

table of incidents - dissecting julie

text transcript + notes below :3

text reads:

A TABLE OF INCIDENTS

"a recurring dream, the surrounding universe a theater scene, on every text page Two secret lovers died in a mutual embrace."

"The phone rang. He's not in at the moment. Can you tell him to call me back? Yes. Sure. Also, please tell him I'm not mad at him anymore."

"the Kafkaesque hero kills his double. It's not a violent death. on stage He approaches his confused pal informed them about killing himself in his dream. That does not work, that's clear. God will not allow it."

"The officers are putting a c offin into a through an open drawer Do you understand? the actor's freedom as it is shown on the

play's script."

"Everything is different. The world itself has no logic whatsoever. un dessin parfait."

end transcript

ok so i started this just drawing julie autopsy then i went insane -- i cut up a viewer's guide and another info booklet i got from a franz kafka inspired art museum/installation i visited in prague that freaked my bean. i thought it was pretty cool and it hurt cutting it up for the first time but then i realized im not really ever gonna re-read it so might as well. im happy with how it turned out and it was really fun having sentences click together in my head like lego bricks and immediately going to cut them out

i also remembered how hellish it is to work with liquid glue- hopefully you can't see it in the pictures but a lot of the papers are so lumpy because of the glue. eventually i remembered how i used to properly use the glue (get a small puddle of it on paper and wipe the backs of paper on it THEN paste it down) and it was really fun

i started this before eating breakfast but then i got carried away and...never ate breakfast and ended up having to eat dinner KALKLADKLKJFA this is bad. dont be like me. this was bad. but i could NOT stop or i would not go back to it

the fucking flower stickers would NOT stick probably because i used oil pastel on his insides. i used prismacolor pencils for the rest of him. ummmm the map behind him is a map of munich i got when i went there on my school trip. i liked getting an art use out of my old keepsakes, because usually theyd just collect dust and never be looked at again lol

tl;dr i had fun hope you like

#THIS IS SO GOOD oh i love the writing so much #still think it atleast somewhat counts since you put it all together and ig like #formed the words to your thinking/ideas even if they arent 100% yours #but oh man. this is awesome it has so many cool parts!!!!!! and again i love the writing and all the ig themes of it #julie himself looks so nice too. little smile :) #i love the like happy look of it all contrasted with the themes of the writing and such #and i like how the text has a black bg. like its probably a lucky coincidence and all but it really like. solidifies its tone #man. what a banger. this is amazing!!!!!!!!

[uniquezombiedestiny]

#me