weirdo-with-a-potato

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

Picked up my university’s satire paper today! You have a way with words .

I like the "Tumblr blogger".

#neil gaiman #but how can this be if Neil Gaiman doesn’t have social media?

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

if you don’t have friends, then what do you call this! *pulls back cloth on cage to reveal partially digested mice*

i speak 4 languages, I’m not fucking scared of you. I have your friends in MY basement.

lmao he thinks i have friends

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

Came Back Wrong from the gocey store

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

summoning circle for the important things in life 🙏🏼

🕯 🕯

🕯 🕯

dead boy

🕯 detectives 🕯

s2 confirmation

🕯 🕯

🕯 🕯

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

My dad is making me read American Gods… So like, what’s it about? The copy of the book we have has no dust jacket, therefore, no summary.

It's about three American Dogs who have to travel home from California to Maine. It's a long journey, but they face down a bear and several other dangers, including dogcatchers.

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

Remember: behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this occasion

#funny shit

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

Sorry thelibraryismytardis, but that’s American beauty/ American psycho. American gods is the story of a small man going on steroids to kill Natzis via frisbee.

My dad is making me read American Gods… So like, what’s it about? The copy of the book we have has no dust jacket, therefore, no summary.

It's about three American Dogs who have to travel home from California to Maine. It's a long journey, but they face down a bear and several other dangers, including dogcatchers.

#American gods #Neil gaiman

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

My dad is making me read American Gods… So like, what’s it about? The copy of the book we have has no dust jacket, therefore, no summary.

It's about three American Dogs who have to travel home from California to Maine. It's a long journey, but they face down a bear and several other dangers, including dogcatchers.

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

DO NOT DO THIS!!!

If a website has a paywall, like New York Times, DO NOT use the ctrl+A shortcut then the ctrl+c shortcut as fast as you can because then you may accidentally copy the entire article before the paywall comes up. And definitely don't do ctrl+v into the next google doc or whatever you open because then you will accidentally paste the entire article into a google doc or something!!!! I repeat DO NOT do this because it is piracy which is absolutely totally wrong!!!

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

But i don’t wanna clean my room :(

Horoscopes by a very tired murder bird.

♈ Aries: March 21–April 19.

The rest of your year will be 'eh' like not great but you're probably not going to suck that badly also dont fuck your ex its not worth it.

♉ Taurus: April 20–May 20.

For the love of all things holy clean your room you might find money in it (probably will be under your bed) also you will see a frog. :)

♊ Gemini : May 21–June 21.

Gay

♋ Cancer: June 22–July 22.

You will pet a cat but it will prefer your sibling/best friend and glare at you across the room. The dog like you though.

♌ Leo: July 23–August 22.

The promotion you wanted or the class you wanted to pass? Failed. You yearn for the mines.

♍ Virgo: August 23–September 22.

Oh you fucked sorry. You may seek safety in my basement. You may not leave though.

♎ Libra: September 23–October 23.

Libra is in the microwave or whatever read more books and go outside at least once. Live laugh lobotomy.

♏ Scorpio: October 24–November 21.

You will find a single money of your currency but when you turn it over its just got a picture of me on it. Cant use it. Sucks to be you.

♐ Sagittarius: November 22–December 21

Stop being a cheap bitch buy that skincare you need it.

♑ Capricorn: December 22–January 19

Stop. Taking. On. Peoples. Problems. You are already a problem.

♒ Aquarius: January 20–February 18

The rest of your year will be kinda lucky. But like annoying luck. You'll find the password to your old email but its just spam.

♓ Pisces: February 19–March 20

You know what you did.

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

guy with eyeliner in 73 yards give me your gender...please guy with eyeliner in 73 yards..

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

thanks for making me think about this, man. I’m not gonna get any sleep now.

the falsettos modern au is just

whizzer, texting from work: hey I want the 🍆🍆🍑 2nite. K? 😘

marvin: okay

and then whizzer just comes home and marvin is sitting at the dining table reading whatever old men read in their free time and in front of him lies not one, but two grocery bags full of eggplants and peaches.

and whizzer is just. too stunned to speak.

thank you for your time

#falsettos

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

Doctor Who 73 Yards

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

“Why should rich people pay more” because fuck ‘em

“So you are okay for paying more when you have money” I am not excluded from ‘fuck ‘em’ when relevant

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

Being born in June should have indicated that I was a massive queer.

[weirdo-with-a-potato]

im madly in love with you

im sorry