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byunmomi · 6 years

Text

an afternoon with Taeyeon, a musing on fandom part 2/2.

Link to my Korea photos, go to end of album: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10156719722985739.1073741874.566325738&type=1&l=8d9d18151a

Link to part 1: http://jerryshi734.tumblr.com/post/176288417908/an-afternoon-with-taeyeon-a-musing-on-fandom-part

…At that point, it was 4 months away from meeting her in person. In a ‘typical’ person’s excited state, I posted this on Instagram.

My IG is connected to my Twitter, so it also posted there. I woke up the next morning with a bunch of Instagram and Twitter notifications from random fans, some who recognized me from Omaze’s blog:

http://blog.omaze.com/red-winners-2018/. (On a side note, after my more recent post, of course it was way more.) The initial aftermath made me think of some things, amplified by the current aftermath.

1. Why do we tend to be drawn toward celebrities? I believe part of it is that we admire their talents, part of it is that we want to be adored (but not sometimes hated) like them, part of it is that we’re made to worship something.

2. Sometimes it’s unexplainable why cool athletic, artistic, cinematic, musical, commercial, scientific, philanthropic, etc stuff leaves us in awe. I believe there is inherent beauty (or darkness, the other side of the coin) in everything, and people are designed to be moved by beauty and darkness. The people who produce the most perceived beauty (which can come as a result of having talent, influence, or money that enables them to do stuff we 'normal’ people we can’t do most of the time) are the people we’re drawn to more, even if we don’t know them personally.

3. We want to love and want to be loved. Love is a fundamental part of the human experience. The love we feel toward our favorite celebrities is, or at least should be, quite different from the love we feel toward God, family, and friends. When I was younger, I 'loved’ my favorite celebrities without thinking about it much. Usually stuff like their talents, looks, and fame. I never felt like I was over-the-top (unlike many people I’ve seen on social media, especially related to Taeyeon and the sweepstakes ha), but I never questioned why I 'loved’ them so much in the first place when I would (probably) never know them personally and there were plenty of times I wasn’t loving toward my family, friends, and community who were right in front of me.

4. When I started to get a bunch of comments + messages on Instagram + Twitter + Youtube, it was kinda a cool feeling, and I thought maybe they would follow me and like my music and photography in the future haha. But let’s be real, they’re only interested in me cuz I had the experience with Taeyeon. Nothin wrong with that, I’m just some random guy who got lucky and got to have that experience, they wouldn’t be interested in anything else beyond me unless maybe I was a celeb myself. But at some moment, I remembered what Taeyeon said about SM Entertainment rarely doing intimate fan engagement stuff like this, how there’s been bad experiences with certain artists in the past, and I thought to myself, James and I are actually playing an important role in all this. Not to sound overimportant, but I believe we were SONE’s representatives that afternoon, and our attitude and behavior could really impact whether SM wants to do fan events like this in the future. I thought we represented ourselves, SONEs, and Michigan USA well. And afterward, I’ve been (blocking a few haters and) replying to other curious fans’ IG messages, and they’ve been appreciative of my responses. It’s not much, but a good attitude goes a long way.

5. Dang, I picture what it’s like for a celeb to get bombarded with comments + messages. Of course I believe sometimes it’s important to do some stuff with fans to show you care about them personally (assuming the company isn’t restrictive ha), but it’s basically impossible to meet or reply to all your fans while still doing your career stuff, family stuff, other life stuff, ya know. And there will always be crazy 'fans’ who are dangers to the celeb (and hate on me online). I treated her with love and respect, treated her the way I’d treat anyone I don’t know too well personally but greatly admire. And she was super cool and friendly, after the starstruck beginning it felt like having a good time with a good friend. I had an amazing (omaze-ing) time, and I know she did too.

Final point, it’s easy to 'worship’ celebrities, but ultimately we should worship God and love others. What’s the ‘right’ way to be a fan? Of course there’s no 'right’ answer, and I’m not gonna get into it here, for now I’ll just say use wisdom. As much inspiration and great athletic, artistic, cinematic, musical, commercial, scientific, philanthropic, etc achievements (hopefully reflecting Jesus’ nature) others can give us, God is the one who holds it all together. I will always have many questions about God and the nature of how stuff works (https://www.howstuffworks.com/), but I hope that I, and all of us, can live in a way that demonstrates that Jesus is the foundation upon which we build our lives and the rest of the beauty all around us.

Peace.

#snsd #taeyeon #omaze #red #sone

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byunmomi · 6 years

Text

an afternoon with Taeyeon, a musing on fandom part 1/2.

After I wrote this (on the plane), I felt it was kinda long, so I’m gonna publish part 2 later and have em link each other.

Link to my Korea photos, go to end of album: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10156719722985739.1073741874.566325738&type=1&l=8d9d18151a

So I just got back from S Korea, where I met Taeyeon thru winning an Omaze (https://www.omaze.com/) sweepstakes. How did I become a fan in the first place? Not terribly interesting, but I’ll do a post sometime if there’s popular demand ha. Of course part of it is the music. Here’s my piano cover of my favorite of her solo releases, I: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbVG_TUszO0

Anyways, the timeline that afternoon was approximately like this.

· ~2-3pm: James and I took taxi from hotel to SM Entertainment main office. There was a slight logistical snag because Omaze said M and A from SM would meet us there and give us a tour of the HQ, while they actually went to our hotel to give us a tour of SMTOWN at the Coex (http://www.smentertainment.com/LifeStyle/CoexArtium#), right next to where we were staying. So they came back to SM office, and it worked out. Taeyeon arrived ~2:40 I think. Of course I was starstruck at first, but I became natural quickly because she was so nice and relaxed, first asked us how we’re doing and what we did in Seoul so far. I forgot what else we talked about first while we drank some refreshments from SM café (https://www.kpopmap.com/made-in-korea-thursday-sm-entertainment-sum-cafe-seoul/).

· ~3-5: We drove to Legend Heroes arcade (https://www.habkorea.net/koreas-new-concept-screen-sports-theme-park-legend-heroes/) for the entertainment part. I was sad we couldn’t ride in her van with her because there were 4 of us, and she had 2 of Girls Generation’s managers with her, so we couldn’t all fit haha. Traffic was heavy cuz heat index was actually over 100 degrees F all our days there, so many people were driving rather than walking or biking I think. On a side note interacting with M and A was cool too. They’re both also Taeyeon’s age, and I’m 4 years younger. M is bilingual cuz she went to school in Canada for a while (like Red Velvet’s Wendy haha), and she was my translator. (My friend James is native Korean and fluent.) The arcade was so much fun. Taeyeon said it was her idea to go. She was good at all the games, we did archery, pitching baseball, bowling, curling, fruit ninja (https://www.instagram.com/p/Blo8Dc1Blo_/?taken-by=taeyeon_ss), shooting zombies, whack a mole. She beat me and James most of the time haha. She picked most of the games, while I picked Mario Kart with Wii wheel cuz Mario Kart Wii is my favorite video game. We were pleasantly surprised the other people playing there didn’t swarm her haha.

· ~5-7: We drove to SMT Seoul (http://www.smt-seoul.com/en/#) for the dinner part. It’s a fancy SM restaurant. We had a private room. There was really good Korean-style tapas like fried chicken, noodles, budaejigae stew, fancy dessert cake, and other stuff I don’t remember because I didn’t touch my food at all half the time. I’m not at the comfort or liberty to share all the stuff we talked about, but some of the stuff we talked about were like how she’s her recent Japan tour and other international activities especially in USA, how I became interested in Kpop and her and Girls Generation’s music, some of her and SM’s fan engagement and music making processes, what we all like to do in our free time, where her puppy Zero’s name came from (Nightmare Before Christmas haha). The most meaningful part for me was when I shared about how music and her music too helped get me through my dark times in 2016-2017, and she shared too about her recently hard times, and we got to encourage each other. At the end, we exchanged gifts and took final pics. James and I got SM gift bags including her Something New album, James gave her a University of Michigan (where we went to college) athletic shirt, I gave her a framed photo I took in Ann Arbor where I wrote a message on the back, mostly in English, a bit in Korean. (By the way, I’m Chinese-American. I’ve been self studying Korean for fun and cultural appreciation starting a year ago.)

· PS ~7-7:30: After Taeyeon had to leave to go to her training activities (which she told us was a secret, preparing for a comeback??), I finally ate most of the food as James and I chatted more with M and A, then we all took a taxi together, us back to our hotel, them back to their homes.

So how this happened, it started in January when I saw an Instagram ad for this campaign: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/taeyeon-dinner-red?ref=taeyeon.

(Here’s where I’d normally go on a stream of consciousness about how do we steward our resources? how do we decide where to spend our money + time? why do these issues like HIV or everything else still exist? why does science + other things seem to break through so slowly? what are the mechanics of how God is actually working in this? In my OCD these thoughts naturally just come, and they’re good to think about (in moderation?) but I’m not gonna talk about it here cuz it distracts from my actual points. End stream of consciousness.)

I looked up the company a bit, and they seemed legit, so I decided to donate, take a shot ha. In Feb, I found out I won, nice. Two employees from the company Facetime interviewed me and made an awkward video out of it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAqN0p_7UeQ. (Also, you should read the comments.) The next day, they made it official and sent me the legal forms.

I received my signed Taeyeon This Christmas cd in the mail on Thu 3/15/17. At that point…to be continued.

#snsd #taeyeon #sone #omaze #red

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byunmomi · 8 years

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[TRANS] Taeyeon Interview in BEAUTY+, September 2016 - “Very Taeyeon-like (Calm) Afternoon”

Taeyeon, a girl who still possesses nervousness. Time with Taeyeon that lazily unfolded in a space containing light.

Behind the Scene

If you’re curious about the editorial with Taeyeon, pay attention. We unveil Taeyeon’s skincare and makeup know-how as well as her secret weapon.

Secret Weapon that Completes Taeyeon’s Perfect Skin

Prior to the photoshoot, Taeyeon used Nature Republic’s Ginseng Royal Silk Watery Cream that she normally enjoys using for radiant skin. Even if you have great makeup on, if the skin underneath is dull or dirty, you can’t show its true beauty. If your skin condition is good, you’ll have the effect of better makeup application. Nature Republic’s Ginseng Royal Silk Watery Cream is an item that she cherishes and it has already been a hot topic on Taeyeon’s SNS. As soon as we took the product out, she said ‘Oh my, I really like this product!’ and smiled brightly. This product improves skin elasticity, reduces wrinkles and provides moisture, all at once, being recognized as a premium anti-aging cream. It’s filled with rare and precious ingredients like 6 year old ginseng, 99% pure gold, royal jelly and silk amino acids. Even amidst busy schedules, the secret weapon that gives her a healthy and beautiful skin that she seems to be born with is Nature Republic’s Ginseng Royal Silk Watery Cream.

Taeyeon’s Pick: What are the Items Taeyeon Used in the Editorial?

1. By Flower Blusher in 03 Grapefruit Cotton Candy: A matte type blush for a girly makeup that overflows with life in a pastel colour. With a big brush, widely apply on the cheek area to show both cheeks in a lovely way.

2. Multiple Touch Stick: With soft application and outstanding wear, a cream type contouring stick that easily completes contour makeup. Made up of a variety of 11 colours for foundation, highlighter, blusher and shading that can be used for multi-purpose makeup.

01 Light Beige: Flawless skin was achieved with a stick foundation that has SPF 37 PA++ and excellent coverage.

04 Shining Beam: Stick highlighter that brings a luxurious shine to the skin. Brought a three-dimensional effect to life by applying to T-zone and brow bones.

11 Coconut: Stick shading product that completes a small and three-dimensional face shape.

3. Nature Origin Triple Colour Tone-Up Cushion: Even while shooting an editorial, correction makeup is necessary. With the combination of 3 colours, you can easily get a brightening tone-up effect; throughout the photoshoot, the tone-up cushion was used by applying it lightly.

Interview: Taeyeon’s Beautiful Beauty Know-How

Taeyeon is spending time recharging after finishing up her first solo concert recently. We asked her about her beauty know-how on how she normally maintains her skin and does her makeup.

Hello Taeyeon. What have you been doing recently?

After finishing my solo concert, whenever I have time, I’ve been checking my body’s condition and having time to recharge. I am also planning for the next album.

We’re sure there’s a difference between your normal makeup and the makeup you wear as you stand on stage as a singer. Normally, what kind of makeup do you enjoy?

Since I wear flashy makeup when I stand on stage, normally, I enjoy light makeup. I like having dewy and light finish on my skin and I only fill in the empty parts of my eyebrow. I apply lip colour very lightly. When I have time, I add liveliness with blush.

These days, contouring makeup is popular. Do you enjoy contouring makeup too?

I enjoy using Nature Republic’s Multiple Touch Stick. You can use it in a variety of ways as a foundation, highlighter, blusher or shader, it applies softly and easily and you can complete a contoured makeup look very quickly. Rather than using hands, you can use the built-in puff to blend, so you can finish your makeup very easily and quickly. I use it especially when I shade or highlight.

Tell us about your skincare regimen. What is your most cherished skincare product?

I enjoy using Nature Republic’s Ginseng Royal Silk Watery Cream. First of all, the texture is light and it contains a lot of medicine-like ingredients that are good for the skin like ginseng extract so when my skin’s condition is falling behind, I apply this product generously and go to sleep. The next morning, my skin is radiant and moist, beyond recognition.

Do you have any know-hows that you use?

I apply it while massaging, or at night, I apply a thick layer like a sleeping pack at night and sleep. On hot days like these days, if you keep it in your refrigerator, it’s also effective.

What kind of skin is Taeyeon most envious of?

Since I wear makeup for long periods of time, I pay attention to elasticity. I’m most envious of skin that is firm with a good skin tone.

When you stand on stage, you wear a lot of over-the-top makeup. What type of cleansing products do you use?

I use cream types that are not irritating. My skin tends to be thin so I try my best to cleanse gently.

Normally, you enjoy dyeing your hair blonde. Do you like blonde hair? What colour do you want to dye your hair next time?

My image changes a lot according to hair colour so I always think it over a lot. I don’t have a distinct reason for liking blonde hair. SNSD members and people around me say that bright colours suit me well. Mmm… If I was going to change my hair colour, I want to try a calm and deep brown colour.

You must have no time for maintenance due to your busy schedule. We’re curious about your home care methods.

I have a massage machine that is portable, so I carry it to schedules and use it. Skin quality is important, but you need to have good circulation inside of your body in order to have strong skin. While recharging, I’m planning on working on my inner beauty with a comfortable heart.

Source: Beauty+

#snsd #taeyeon #kim taeyeon #Beauty+#trans #magazine

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byunmomi · 8 years

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[TRANS] Taeyeon Interview in Ceci, September 2016 - “Peeping Her”

It was our third meeting. Up to now, she is not a person who approaches first and tells a lot of stories so Taeyeon is a person who we want to ask even more and we’re curious about what she is thinking. Since debuting as SNSD, her position has never been shaken up. After releasing mini album , her solo activities which actively started last year have drawn favorable reviews from even more of the public. Someone said it like this. Taeyeon is just a genuine person who loves singing the most, and after hearing that, I thought that people could’ve looked at her from a certain mold, as she is a girl group leader and also a rumored ‘homebody’. As she came into the shoot location, she told us ‘long time no see’, and asked if we’d been well while smiling. We started our conversation with Taeyeon, who said photoshoots are still difficult but she enjoys interviews.

You told us several times that you find photoshoots difficult, but it’s hard to believe because every cut is an A cut. Thank you. (Laughs) Truthfully, you can’t ignore the time and experience I’ve gained through SNSD activities up to now, and regardless, it needs to come out nicely so I’m trying hard.

Like you told us during a break earlier, <WHY> album jacket is pretty, even from the perspective of non-fans. We think this appearance suits you the best. Normally, there are way more photos that members take of me. If a member who likes taking photos, Tiffany included, takes a pretty photo of me, I’m satisfied for days. (Laughs) There are many fun photo apps so I also enjoy playing around with those too.

We’ve done several photoshoots together and yet, we’ve never seen you show dislike for the hair, makeup and outfits that the staff have prepared. Are you that confident? (Laughs) More than confidence, I tend to entrust as much as possible. I like to think that they know it well and will treat me well. I’m trusting the words of staff who are experts in their individual fields and have seen me for a long time. My work is to express it well, regardless of what colour they’ve applied on me, or how they’ve styled me. I have to express it. If the results are not good, it’s another lesson to learn.

But when the results come out, all of the feedback comes back under Taeyeon’s name. I just tend to trust them. Especially on an editorial photoshoot like today, it’s not a simple, everyday appearance. It’s a flashy and decorated appearance, so I’m going in with the attitude of, ‘I’m attempting a new style. If not now, then when would I try this?’

We’ve searched and there aren’t a lot of interviews but it’s easier to find you on a reality program. Is that less burdensome for you? My inclination is to dislike things that are pre-determined and in a mold and I prefer being natural. For photoshoots and interviews, the mood of the location has a huge effect. Reality program has no specific setup and it shows the flow, and what really happens, so it suits my personality better.

If you had to pick out the main quality of Taeyeon as a person, how would you explain it? Truthfully, I’m not sure if I know myself very well, but my normal emotion has a bit of up & down. I tend to be very affected by the mood and environment, so it’s hard for even me to guess. It’s too difficult to describe myself with one word. I think members, who are always with me, know me well. I’m a person who pursues flow, like how water flows naturally.

But your occupation makes it difficult to be left natural. You have to put in a lot of effort to show a perfect performance. That’s true. So I’m nervous every time I stand on stage. It’s a job where you have to express yourself during a short period of time that you’re given, so there are times when it’s difficult. But as I keep doing it, within that, my personality comes out. Even when I sing, rather than pour out emotions all at once, I try to express it according to flow.

You were on the cover of Ceci in January of 2014. Not a lot of time has passed since, but in the last 1-2 years, you definitely have an air of maturity. Since having to make a lot of decisions on my own, I’ve become a bit more cool-headed. Truthfully, it’s a difficult thing for a member like me, whose colour is not distinct.

What do you mean your colour is not distinct? For instance, I’m really close to Tiffany and our hearts are well aligned. But our tastes are different. It’s completely opposite. Tiffany clearly knows what she wants and she knows how to express it precisely, when it comes to things like colour and shape for example. I’m a bit indecisive and I have a hard time making decisions, so I can’t easily say what I want. I’m not my own person sometimes. But as I started my solo activities and all of the staff are looking only at me and all of the work is happening with me at the center, I had to make a lot of decision and lead. It was so hard but now I’m figuring out methods to make decisions. I learned a lot about giving up things that don’t matter and how to supervise things that do matter.

Despite that, are your solo activities enjoyable? It’s enjoyable on stage. But when I come down from the stage, my head becomes chaotic and I have lots of thoughts of did I do that right, or what should I prepare going forward. I tend to look to the staff for their reactions.

There are people who enjoy making decisions and leading, and there are also people who find that burdensome. Which side is Taeyeon on? Right now, I think there’s more for me to learn. I’m at a stage where I need help to choose and make decisions, rather than doing all of it on my own. It seems like I’d be good at doing everything on my own but that’s not true. I have a lot of fears.

Is it a fear of failure? That the results will be bad? That’s not it at all. I’m afraid that regret will remain. Since I’m standing on stage by myself, if I choose what suits me and do it well, that’s ideal but my decision could be wrong. The fear has to do with regret. As a result, I need people who can look at me with an objective gaze, and I think it’s right to actively collect feedback. This work is not done just because I like doing it. It’s true that it’s burdensome but the right thing is to do it together.

‘Starlight’ starts with the lyrics ‘Love is amazing’. What are things in Taeyeon’s life right now that is amazing? The biggest issue recently was the solo concert <Butterfly Kiss>. Maybe now I can relax on stage because I was able to see the audience’s faces. I do concerts regularly but this time was different. Even if we didn’t speak directly, when I saw their faces, I could feel that we were communicating together so it really made me happy. It felt like fans were smiling even more, and it was different from before. I think they enjoyed it with me.

Comparing SNSD’s debut stage and the first time you stood on stage as a solo artist, which one made you shake more? Of course, the first stage of my solo activity. It’s so different from when I’m together with the members. It felt like all of my experiences up to that point had all disappeared and it really felt like I was starting from the beginning. I thought that I don’t normally shake a lot but I wanted to be on stage in an anxious state but when I stood on stage for the first time for ‘I’, I shook so much to the point that the mic was shaking. Even when I think of it now, it makes me shake.

After you were featured on Amber’s ‘Shake That Brass’ last year, you’ve been promoting restlessly to now. Even while you are busy, your expression seems more relaxed than before. There hasn’t been a special change. I’ve always prepared and showed a stage for singing, but I think the feelings I had after talking with fans through SNS had an effect. If you look at just my personality, I like to keep things to myself and hide away, rather than showing everything. But thanks to fans, I felt that there is a need to do things that fans want, and that there are things I want to do and things I should do going forward. I’ve come to think that when it comes to music, I shouldn’t decline projects with a withdrawn heart, but whenever I can do things, I should do a lot here and there. I was able to accept duets and features in songs more comfortably.

Your heart of wanting to do things that fans want is a type of love. It’s a similar feeling as wanting to study hard and do well in school to receive compliments from your parents. I want to receive a good grade and show everyone. So fans are like friends with whom 10 years have passed, with an enduring and connected heart like a parent-child relationship. I can feel their big heart devoted to me, from my meals to my health. Of course, they worry a lot too. (Laughs)

When a girl group members debuts with a solo, showing off a sexy concept is basically officially on record. We’re curious what kind of concerns you had about singing about yourself with ‘I’, a song that’s not even about love. With my job, I work before the public and a countless number of people, but I’m alone and I have my own position. I thought a lot about what colour suits me the best. I thought that I wanted to do something that is me-like, serene and naturally. We put a lot of thought into what genre I would choose, and how the melody would be expressed. And truthfully, ‘sexy’ is not a word that I could express well. (Laughs)

We felt that you’ve grown into an artist who can tell your own story, as is. There was a side of me that people could’ve predicted when I announced that I would release a solo album. Like OSTs that have received a lot of love or emotional ballads. But there are so many genres that I could attempt, and I wanted to show a different side of me that hasn’t been shown yet. It’s not that I have a specific genre I prefer but as a singer, I wanted you to hear various songs.

What is the path that 28 year old Taeyeon, who is in her 10th year as a singer, wants to take going forward? I don’t know. I don’t know when I’ll receive this question again but speaking from right now, I’ve never thought of anything else other than music. Going forward, I think I will continue to do music in a way that’s easy and natural and calm, without going overboard with risks and carefully selecting songs. Were you anticipating a grandiose response?

No. You keep saying you’re easy and natural but what you’ve achieved thus far is exceptional. We don’t think you need to be afraid. I do think that there needs to come a time when I can’t be afraid anymore. If situation changes, a person needs to change to adapt. I will try hard so I won’t be afraid and I will watch over things that need my attention.

What do you do at home these days? You know a lot of internet slang and you use them at the right time in the right places. I use a VOD service to watch movies and TV programs. Fans teach me all of the internet slang. When I do SNS, I can see them in the fans’ reactions, and I leave comments to have conversations with them. Whenever I do that, I learn the language of the teenagers these days. (Laughs) I am learning by leaning over their shoulders.

Female fans are very curious about your beauty routine. What is the secret to your unchanging ‘fairy beauty’? Honestly, these days I haven’t been able to receive as much skin care as before. I try to use packs at home. More than skin, I’ve become more interested in detox and fixing posture. I exercised for a while to increase my stamina while preparing for the concert. But each person is different, so to some, exercise itself can be over-exertion. I want to focus more on circulation and maintaining my body.

Lastly, what words do you want to leave on the pages of Ceci? Anything is good. It’s a very broad topic. What would be good? Ah, ‘natural and calm, as water flows’, leave these words. (Laughs)

—

“With Tiffany, the two of us have traveled to the US before. We went to Disney World in Florida. We are both passionate fans of Walt Disney. We planned and prepared for it together, without the help of managers or anyone else, so travel itself was a new experience. We created a lot of memories, and personally, it’s a trip that is most memorable for me.”

Scan Source: DC Inside

#snsd #taeyeon #kim taeyeon #ceci #ceci korea #2016 #september #trans

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byunmomi · 8 years

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[TRANS] Taeyeon Interview in K WAVE, March 2016

The colours of Taeyeon’s solo albums seem to be a bit different from existing SNSD. After , <Rain> was unexpected.

What kind of songs did you think I would do?

Let’s see. Somewhere in the middle between SNSD’s innocent image and Taeyeon’s cute and bright image?

Haha. My personality tends to be free and not rough, so the songs are similar to that. It feels dreamlike. I like things that are natural. Just something that’s free.

Your natural and free disposition is reflected in the album.

That must be true. There were fans who said they felt a new charm from my first solo album .

Whenever you release a record, it’s an all-kill. It was like that this time too, right?

I’m just embarrassed and thankful. My first solo album received a lot of love so people continued to anticipate following that. This album is a digital single but there was such a big reaction that I received a lot of congratulatory phone call from many people. From manager oppa and family, which goes without saying. Even from people who didn’t contact me during gave me a lot of congratulations over the phone.

What did SNSD members say?

For members, it’s natural because they witness the preparation process I go through for music. They’re calm, like ‘That’s okay’. (Laughs) If they overreact by saying they knew that would happen, they knew it would do well, or saying it’s daebak, it makes me squirm. Haha.

When you decide on an album concept, do you have input?

I tend to show the results to Tiffany. Before the record is open, I show the unedited versions of album photos or music video to Tiffany. I don’t know why but I feel like she’s sharp. I feel reassured once it goes through Tiffany.

So what did she say? Her first impression of Rain.

She said she really liked it. She said it’s different from what she had been thinking and the music video has a feeling of being somewhat natural and raw. When you watch a SNSD music video, all of the members’ outfits are matching and we dance in synchronicity. She said she likes it because it was filmed comfortably with everything a bit more relaxed, with a different feel from (SNSD music videos).

After listening to , I wondered if this album would have a similar feel. I thought it aimed for a free and hippie-like feeling. I felt a rock-like image but <Rain> is different.

This time, it feels like jazz is mixed in. These days, music is not locked in a single genre. There are songs that mix jazz with R&B, and it’s difficult to narrow down to a single genre. If you look at the mood, <Rain> is R&B-like, jazz-like and ballad-like.

Even so, should I say that it has the unique scent of a Korean song? It’s a bit familiar.

Really? Then I’m relieved. All of the songs I received were all created by foreign songwriters so I did worry that it wouldn’t match with Korean sensibilities. It’s probably became more natural with Korean lyrics.

Taeyeon’s solo album songs are sophisticated.

It’s somewhat pop-like but also feels ambiguous.

When I listen to your solo album, I can feel Taeyeon has been longing musically.

Ah, me? I wasn’t thirsty, hahaha. With SNSD and because I sang momentarily on OSTs, I was satisfied with that, but when I look back, I don’t think I’ve ever really felt like I’ve sang to my heart’s desire. Through solo activities, now I feel like ‘I am singing’.

Since you are part of a group, instead of Taeyeon’s individual colour, you couldn’t help but show SNSD’s colours, right?

If SNSD sang bright music that fit the girl group image, now it’s good to go in the direction of the style where it contains stories that I want to tell.

That must be why many people are saying, ‘Ah, now Taeyeon’s individual colour is showing. It’s mature. She grew musically’, as they are listening to Taeyeon’s solo album.

But there’s no ‘this is the type of music I really want to do’. The music that I’m into changes from time to time, and even if I want to do this type of music this time, next time, I want to try different music. If you look at it one way, it could be that my own colour is not clear, but if you look at it another way, it could be that I can do any genre.

Isn’t similar to looking for clothes that fit you still?

I think so. I’m still looking.

If people are expecting something different from you musically, isn’t that overwhelming?

Of course it is. As more time passes, there are a lot of friends who debut who are young, pretty and fresh. People are attracted to new and flashy things. So before a comeback, we really worry a lot over what kind of appearance we need to show, or what we should do. Because of a lot of activities, I also think we’ve saturated our image. We are promoting in Korea, of course, and Japan as well so we worry about what we should show now.

The lifespan of idols tends to be short. Since there’s a window of time for activities.

That’s right. So when we go to music broadcasts, I wonder if it’s a place where we should be. Because there are young friends who are fifteen or sixteen. There is a 10 year age different between me and Red Velvet’s Yeri. She was born in 1999. I was born in 1989. It’s an occasion where you are being seen so it’s obviously overwhelming when you’re developing a concept. You can’t help but worry.

SNSD Taeyeon, solo Taeyeon, TaeTiSeo’s Taeyeon. Isn’t it difficult to pull the weight of three teams(?) at the same time?

There are members who act, we’ve each divided into several fields and with a lot of individual activities, I don’t think we’ve been able to show people a lot of our musical side. TaeTiSeo, as a representative of SNSD, has been able to show the appearances and music that SNSD hasn’t been able to show and it has been able to fulfill the musical side so I’m glad. What I can show with members and what I can show alone is different, so it’s almost not that difficult. I actually really like it.

You said you wanted to discuss a lot about music during the interview, so I felt like you’ve had a musical awakening.

It’s because the only thing I can do well is music. (Laughs) Recently, I’ve been hearing questions asking me if I’m going to act. Everyone is acting so I’m asked if I think about acting at all but I would like to sing properly, at least once. I haven’t yet done it to the point where I’ve reached my limit. Since I’m out publicly as a singer, I’d like to do it properly at least once and then attempt other things.

You’re so cool.

I want to do at least one thing properly.

You must have heard you’re doing so well many times but despite that, your heart is still modest, which is admirable.

It’s not possible to satisfy yourself. Everyone is like that. (Laughs)

The premise of ‘Because he/she is an idol’ must have been my own prejudice. So I thought everyone was the same.

If you say idol, you could think of them wanting to appeal in a visual, external way. In every genre, it would be nice to show myself, but I still think the focus is music. I’m always asked about various things like fashion, style or interests but I only really want to talk about music.

Your laughter is very vigorous. Actually, my close friend really likes the sound of Taeyeon’s vigorous laugh but they were disappointed that it’s difficult to see these days. They heard it often when you were a radio DJ in the past.

I was a bit immature. When I was a radio DJ.

Has your personality changed a bit? As you were passing your teens to your mid-20s.

Even when I think about it, I think I’ve changed a lot. I started radio when I was 21 and when I think about it now, I was too young. I had just turned 20 and became an adult. I read and told stories, as if I knew things. Now when I think about it, whew~ Back then, I hadn’t experienced much so whenever I commented, I thought that I was inadequate. So I did vignettes, like a variety show, and I couldn’t help but be a bit brighter. My personality became like that, even without me realizing it. As time passed and I got older, I became more mature. When I was active as a young idol, I asserted my own opinions and went through conflicts with many netizens, and I’ve grown up through that. I was hurt a lot too. ‘Ah, this is how I’m being perceived. That’s not my intention. I can be viewed like this.’ I think I’ve felt a lot of these types of feelings.

I think you mature through hardships where you definitely get hurt and the healing process that follows.

I think when I was a radio DJ and my maturity period were interlocked. I was really thankful for radio. After stopping radio activities, there were no opportunities to talk. I would chat excitedly and now that I was doing barely any variety shows, there were no opportunities to talk. One day, when I was doing an interview, I forgot how to speak. When the camera light went on, I would stumble over words and after that, I’ve had times when I would feel nauseated around cameras.

No one would have imagined that Taeyeon would have camera nausea. There are people who say your music colour has changed a bit. As your personality changed.

Should I say that my personality is a bit dark? There’s a side of me that’s a bit sensitive. If I’m with members, I’m playful. Normally, I’m very quiet. I like being alone. Of the members, I tend to be the one who is least likely to enjoy things.

Isn’t that why you play well with puppies? You share stories with a puppy at home?

What do I do when puppies like me? They just like me blindly.

I think your personality has been reflected in the album a bit.

Yes. When I was starting solo preparations, I was thinking about what kind of songs I should sing and decided that cool and calculated doesn’t suit me. Since I like comfort and honesty, I vowed to show music that was similar to that. Sexy female singer doesn’t suit me and I’m not BoA unnie, so I didn’t even imagine showing a performance. I’m only starting now so I really wanted to just return to the beginning, so I wanted it to feel like starting to draw on a blank paper. So the song that came out of that was .

Is there a method or a standard by which you select the song?

Every entertainment company has an ANR department. It’s a department that manages recordings and when there’s a record planned, they contact many songwriters. After that, ANR staff does the first round of filtering and then lets me listen. After that, we discuss together and that’s how we choose.

That must be how you chose <Rain> this time too?

Yes.

How was it? When you first heard it?

As soon as I heard it for the first time, I really liked it. I really liked the beat. They said ‘Do you want this song? Or should we give it to another team?’ and I said ‘No, who will you give this to? It’s mine. I’ll do it. I’ll do it’. (Laughs) They said ‘Will this style be okay?’ and asked me one more time and I said ‘I completely like it?’. The company didn’t really like the second song <Secret>. I said this is mine. I said I need to do it no matter what, and the company couldn’t win. There are a lot of people who like that song, more than I expected. I couldn’t believe this unexpected result. Of course, there are songs that I liked that didn’t do well.

Right. Wasn’t there a phenomenon of, if Taeyeon doesn’t like it, it does well?

It was like that during SNSD. I didn’t like <Gee> and <Oh!>. But the year that we promoted with that song, we won a big award and we were #1 for 9 consecutive weeks. I wondered why the songs that I liked didn’t do well.

They must’ve been songs that were between popular appeal and artistic appeal.

I don’t think my code fits with popular appeal. Songs with popular appeal have a hook that repeats so it’s good to sing along to. More so than songs like that, I like songs where you can’t tell where the refrain is and where the second verse starts. I really like songs that are fantastical or lounge music.

Then, every rookie singer should sing their song for Taeyeon. If you hear it and you don’t like it, it will do well.

That’s just for SNSD. Hahaha.

This song is emotional and rhythmical; the groove is nice. Taeyeon’s voice rings out strongly. Your voice is a bit sinewy. Should I say it’s high-toned and you can feel the energy? So I thought soft songs would suit but this song suits well too.

More than this being my style, I think I’m expressing in a way that matches the song. That’s not really a good thing. I feel like I don’t have my own specific colour. My voice and colour is not coherent so every time I record, I always think ‘Ah, how should I do this?’ It’s difficult. Of course, people say it in a positive way. They tell me that it’s actually a good thing that I can express songs, without being tied to a genre, and if you hear it like that, it can be a good thing too. But I have more instance of mental breakdown than anything. Still.

Singers, or idols, or SNSD is so famous that there are many instances where you have to limit your behaviour. If you do that, there’s less opportunities for experiences and it could be difficult to express those feelings.

That’s why I purposely watch a lot of movies. When I watch movies, I can feel this and I can feel that. I think ‘Ah, there are people like that too’. As expected, there are a lot of limitations. Where would friends who have become famous young go to experience things freely? But I started my adult life first so I have a lot of conversations with adults, and learn a lot through stories with staff members. It was big, getting hurt at a young age. I think it’s necessary to have time to get hurt. A little. (It’s hard if it’s a lot.)

Artists need to freshen their minds. How do you do it?

I’m still looking for it. I’m very much a homebody, so I think the only thing I do is drink occasionally with members. After I got my driver’s license and had a car, I drove around but paparazzi followed me around, so I had to stop. Even that became a limitation and I became conscious of it, so I call friends over to my house, or I spend time with members.

It makes me a bit sad. What do you do at home?

I drink, I watch movies, just really wholesome. Food (she hesitates for a moment)… I have to order it. I can’t cook. (Laughs)

What’s a dish you’re good at (cooking)?

A dish? Can I say cereal? I live with Tiffany right now. Tiffany’s personality is very outgoing. Thanks to her, I got outside and do things. You know, American friend culture. Whenever it’s any special day, she says we need to make cupcakes. She tells me come do things while halfway making cupcakes. So I end up doing it with her. When she says we need to bake cookies, I bake it with her. She says we need to write a card, so I write one. No matter what, she says we need to do it together. (Laughs) So I think I end up moving my hands at least because of this.

Isn’t personality contagious? Or become assimilated.

Mmm, I don’t know. Our tastes are a bit different. But we are very compatible. If Tiffany is red, I’m blue. But fascinatingly, we are compatible. I think it’s because we’ve lived together for a long time. It has already been over 10 year since we’ve lived together. We don’t provoke one another because we know the other person’s dislikes. We avoid what the other person dislikes and we know each other well. When I make fun of her, I know the limits. So I end it right there. Even if she gets mad, I know what I can do to loosen her up. So I do it up to that point. I don’t not do it. I do do it.

Your relationship with the members are still very good. You still do things together.

I’ve been with them longer and more than family. I’m from a rural area and because I came to Seoul when I was young, I’ve seen the members more than family. Even if I see them for the first time after a month without seeing them, it seems like I saw them yesterday.

Are your tastes in music different from Tiffany?

I think we have similar listening tastes. Fascinatingly, listening to music is different from singing it. There are genres that are easy to sing, which are different from genres that are comfortable to listen to. Our listening is similar. But when it comes to singing, we each have different tastes that we want.

We heard you listen to Rihanna often.

I heard she has a new album so I’m listening to it. I like strong music like this. I like hip hop, R&B and soul - I really like those. But if I end up doing music like this, I’m not sure if I will be able to express it well.

When you’re alone, aren’t you practicing rapping?

There was a rap when I was preparing for the TaeTiSeo album. But I couldn’t do it. It was my part and every time it was that moment, my mouth wouldn’t open. So I passed that part along to Tiffany. It was a song called <Stay>. But I couldn’t do it. It doesn’t come out. I protested why they’re making me do something I haven’t done before and they said just try it once. But I said I couldn’t do it.

Then we’ll say that you’re not thinking of doing hip hop.

Hip hop is not just rap. Hahaha. There’s hip hop R&B and there’s a lot more so I can’t give it up yet.

Truthfully, you did with Verbal Jint. There’s rap in it.

I’m not sure if they were joking with me, but again, manager oppa told me to do that rap. There was female rap too. But it was too much for me to rap. Even more so, I didn’t think rap was right for my first album and I think I still need more time for rap. We’ll put rap on hold for now.

#snsd #taeyeon #kim taeyeon #interview #trans #kwave magazine #k wave #k wave magazine

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