ckjbun

[ckjbun]

Kinda an important notice ...

Hey y'all! I haven't been on here much for the past several months, not sure if you even remember me lol

But yeah, if you do, I've got some things to say...

You don't have to read all of this, there is a TLDR at the end but I just want to use my blog to vent.

Sooo ... In the last few months, my health was slowly getting worse and worse. It started with a blister-like rash on my hands. At that time, I was working in the lab wearing gloves. So I thought maybe it was due to the friction of the gloves on my skin when opening bottles (I had to open a lot of bottles which were under high pressure).

After a while, I became more and more listless, I had no motivation to do the things I used to love like cooking or writing theories. I didn't feel like keeping up with any manga etc.

And then pain started to set in. At the beginning, it was only in the morning. Pain in my joints of my hands. But I ignored it because I had this pain yearly and my doctor always said, "It's probably nothing. You're too young." He was referring to me being too young for rheumatic problems.

I noticed how I started to have problems with concentrating. I started to forget things easily. I started to struggle with expressing myself or with remembering what I was gonna say or do. Much more than usually.

The pain didn't stop with my hands. It spread into my arm muscles and my legs and hips slowly became more and more stiff. It was getting harder for me to stand up.

I still ignored it because "I had no time". I was stressed because of my studies. I had to work on my bachelor thesis and exams. And since my ability to focus declined, I was getting more stressed because I wasn't able to study. I spent days scrolling on social media without taking in any information. With each day not studying, I had even "less time". So I told myself that I will deal with this pain after my exams.

Yeah, I know, stupid right?

The pain peaked after my exams. My whole body was in pain. I was unable to get up from my bed. Every little wiggle of my finger hurt. Every attempt to bend my knees shot me to hell.

I know, it sounds like I'm exaggerating. And maybe I am. But at that moment, I genuinely felt like I would die if I moved.

And then .. it got better!!

The pain lessened. I was able to move. I was overjoyed. I thought I had juvenile arthritis (simply said chronic joint pain due to inflammation). But if my symptoms are getting better without treatment, it's a good sign, right? Right????

Yeahhhh, nope. All the pain suddenly came back two weeks after it was getting better.

And so cold. I was so cold everyday.

So yeah, I spent the last month or more getting sent from one doctor to another. Taking blood and urine tests here and there. Going to the emergency. Taking x-rays and body scans. More blood tests. Trying to figure out what was wrong with my body.

The first time one of the doctors told me something about the test results was on March the 1st, after my first day of work at my internship.

"You have an autoimmune disease."

Yeah, I suspected that.

"It might be Lupus erythematodes."

...

A vague memory of a celebrity announcing they had Lupus surfaced.

Lupus ... a wolf, my latin brain thought.

Of course, I googled it.

"95% of the people with this disease survive the first 5 years. 85% survive the first 10 years."

What about 20 years?? Does everyone die off after the first 10 years???

More google searches.

"Most patients have an almost normal life span."

Relief.

"As long as it doesn't attack your organs."

Panic.

At that time, I had lower back pain for two weeks. Right where the kidneys are. Additionally, I felt a weird pain a little bit above my left chest and in my stomach area.

I might wanna explain more what systemic Lupus erythematodes is. But it's complicated because every patient can have different symptoms and I'm still learning about this disease.

But what it basically does is inflame and cause pain to your organs. Most commonly it affects your joints and skin. If your internal organs are affected, it gets complicated. Even deadly, if it is your kidneys. It can basically inflame any part of your body that's why the symptoms are so versatile.

Often the inflammation occurs in "batches". Inbetween these flare ups of pain, you might have no symptoms at all. In my case, I still have morning stiffness and pain in my hand joints. I also don't have strength in my hands.

What causes these flare ups? UV-light, stress, infections can be very dangerous and probably a few more things I forgot.

But most importantly, most of the patients have a limited "energy reserve". Every, and I mean literally e v e r y activity requires a lot of energy. Normally, I can't remove my blankets on my own because they feel too heavy. So my mom wakes up every morning to help me get up and wear socks.

The thing is, if I overuse my energy, I won't pass out but rather draw from tomorrow's energy reserve. But what happens in the next few days is another flare up of pain. So I have to be very careful.

Fast forward to last week, I finally got the official diagnosis.

Last July, I was in Rome, walking kilometres and climbing stairs up and down the whole day. No big issues except for tired feet.

Now, I'm already exhausted before I even leave the house for work.

It hurts. It hurts me and it hurts my family to see me like this. My family is super supportive. They do so much for me like washing my feet, massaging me etc. All the things that seemed so easily done, suddenly required so much energy. Especially my mom helps me a lot. And I feel so bad because she's not getting younger and I know she has health issues too. I know she's pushing herself.

Most of my friends and relatives keep their distance because they don't want to upset me. But I actually just want one shoulder to cry on. Because I don't want to cry in front of my mom any more. I know it hurts her. So so much.

So yeah, I wanted to tell y'all why I was absent and I will continue to be so. I want to focus on my health and try implementing life style habits that lessen the pain. Not sure when and if I'm coming back.

I've read that for some women it got better with age, so let's hope I'm one of them. I will start medication soon, so let's hope that it will help me and not affect me negatively. Let's hope I will regain the strength to do the things I used to love.

And most importantly, I hope my family stays alright.

Disclaimer: I'm sorry, if I got any medical facts wrong. As I said, I'm still learning about it and there is so much info. I'd be happy if you could correct me. Thanks.

TLDR;

My health declined over the last months. I've been diagnosed with a very rare autoimmune disease. Since I was in a lot of pain, I wasn't online much and I will continue not to be. I want to focus on my health. Currently, there is no cure but maybe I can lessen the symptoms by implementing healthy habits.

TLDR END;

If you read all of this, thank you so so much. It means a lot to me that you gave me some of your time to listen to me <3 but I totally understand if you didn't!!

I'm very grateful to have found this community. The tumblr side of bsd has helped me so much during this pandemic. I'm very thankful for the people I met on here last year. I really hope that life has good things for you and that you stay healthy. I'm sending much love to y'all.

Especially my mutuals. I'm sorry that I haven't interacted with y'all for such a long time. But you really made my last year so much better and I'm grateful for that. I hope you guys are alright.

@n1kolaiz @right-on-the-money @samsa19 @banunuisthebest @elk208 @everyonesfavoritebastard @chazukekani @atalina-falling @emmacifer @pompompurin1028 @agni-skies @justanotherdamnedweeb @boredotaku567 @tunamayuuu

I feel like I'm missing one or two people. I'm really sorry if I forgot you. My memory has gotten worse.

Take care everyone! Maybe I will scroll through my tumblr once in a while and interact with your posts. But yeah, please stay safe!

#personal #long post #not bsd

[ckjbun]

BSD ch.99 ENG Fan Translation

interpreter: @samsa19​

cleaner + typesetter: @xkenmax​

guest typesetters Kita and Dea! they’re the ones who helped us get an insanely high quality this time;; thank you so much for your help! 

read here (mangadex) for a higher quality version or scroll below!

disclaimer: all of our posts are only intended to share our interpretations of the work. they are incomplete and for private purposes. they are not official translations. to get the complete content in the official English volumes please purchase Yen Press’s published volumes on Amazon by Kafka Asagiri and Harukawa Sango.

Keep reading

#bungou stray dogs #bsd #bsd 99 #bsd 99 spoilers #AHHHH I'M NOT UP TO DATE SO I MISSED U GUYS LAST TRANSLATION #I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU UPLOAD AGAIN <333 #hope y'all are doing good #and thanks to the guest typesetters <3

[ckjbun]

BSD ch.98 ENG Fan Translation

interpreter: @samsa19​

cleaner + typesetter: @caffeinatedseri​ @xkenmax​

read here (mangadex) or below! 

disclaimer: all of our posts are only intended to share our interpretations of the work. they are incomplete and for private purposes. they are not official translations. to get the complete content in the official English volumes please purchase Yen Press’s published volumes on Amazon by Kafka Asagiri and Harukawa Sango.

Keep reading

#bungou stray dogs manga #bsd 98 #bsd #bsd spoilers #bungou stray dogs

[ckjbun]

I'M SEEING THIS SO LATE. LOVE YOU LOTS, KAT!! I'm also very grateful to have met you last year. I'm so happy we both joined the same discord server! Ngl even tho we were mutuals before I was just too shy to interact with you even tho I thought you seemed so nice and that I would love to discuss things with u T-T ofc credits to @n1kolaiz and @shamelesspastawobblerland love you both as well, thanks for bringing us all together <3

Thank you for making my 2021 so much better, I hope we can talk even more in 2022. (I finally read no longer human and would love to talk to you about it T-T )

Also, thank you so much for supporting my stuff as well, it means so much to me <3

I know you've made some big changes in 2022 and I can't imagine how hard these were, I really admire u for that. I wish you only the best in this new year and that everything goes smoothly for you because you deserve it. <3

To my dearest mutuals,

I wish you all a lovely and wonderful new year. I still can't believe I have made so many amazing friends on here, who share my interests and don't mind watching me hyperfixate on Dazai lol.

But in all seriousness, you all have made my year so much brighter and I'm so happy to say that I have met you all and can call you guys my mutuals and even friends.

Communication isn't my forte, and I'm shy to interact even with you guys at times and awkward haha. But I'd love to get to know you all more and chat with you guys sometime <3 I adore receiving notifications from you guys and talking to you all, if you'd have me I'd love to become even closer friends ><

But above all, thank you for making my year a little brighter. For enjoying my works, and reading or listening to my random ramblings. I will say year hasn't been the easiest for me, and I have been met with quite a few emotional slumps, but I'm extremely grateful for you all ily. Thank you for having me this year <3

~ Kat

Tagging especially @requiem626k @alittlesimp @sonder-paradise @tender-rosiey @hanazou @n1kolaiz @nameless-shrimp @chuuyasboots @sebtomm @plxviofiles @paradise-creator @jadegreenimmortality @shamelesspastawobblerland @greenshirtimagines @missrown @moon-mars-ikemen @sebtomm @xo-cuteplosion-xo @svnflowery @shinscig @ckjbun @shakespearesdrugdealer @shadyteacup @booktheraepy @kiyokoxd @internetkilledtheroxstar @jessbeinme15 if I missed anyone I'm terribly sorry :')

#my lovely mutual #kat <3 #sorry not bsd #💌

[ckjbun]

Imagine kunikida teaching kenji maths when they don't have to work T-T i need to see this visually. kenji is such a good child and I couldn't imagine someone better than kunikida that takes care of him.

where kenji lives ( and why i think it’s with kunikida or fukuzawa )

- so, as we know. kenji is fourteen. this means that he legally can’t live without an adult.

- as seen with kyouka and naomi, they live with another member of the ada who is a adult. ( kyouka with atsushi, and naomi with junichiro. )

- but we have never gotten any hint as to where kenji lives. kenji, a boy who barely knows anything about the city and would definitely not be able to live on his own. ( doesn’t understand what money is, remember! )

- the options are as follows ; ranpo, yosano, dazai, fukuzawa and kunikida. i’ll be making a list on why i don’t think kenji lives with them ( or does, in two cases. )

1. ranpo

- ranpo as we know is extremely carefree, so i really don’t think that he’d offer to take in a child he doesn’t know, and let them live in his space.

2. yosano

- i think this would be the third most possible option, actually. but honestly i think that she’d also rather not house a random child? i‘m not the most sure of her characterization, though.

3. dazai

- i think this is obvious. and i believe in the manga, we saw his room? i remember something about that. i don’t really have much evidence for ‘why not’ here either.

4. fukuzawa

- fukuzawa is the president of the agency, and probably has one of the best possibilities to be able to take care of kenji. he’s raised ranpo from around this age, so he probably does know how kids work, and he’s responsible. he also does have interactions with kenji that display him in a closer light. ( such as helping kenji with what appears to be a phone. )

5. kunikida

- i personally believe that kenji lives with kunikida. kunikida, as we know, has a schedule that kenji would probably get used to quickly if he did help around the village, such as possibly getting up early and doing chores. kunikida is also extremely likely to be qualified to help kenji with budgeting a paycheck and his education. and in the first season, we saw that kenji respects kunikida enough to do what he says. ( when he threw the black lizard out of the window because kunikida told him to. ) kunikida also checked in on rokuzo, and provided him with help.

it is also technically possible for kenji to live alone, but i don’t really believe that this is the case, mainly because he doesn’t understand the city. he wouldn’t be able to budget properly. so i do believe that he lives with an adult member of the ada. thank you for reading, feel free to correct any of my points ( constructively ) <3

#ahhh I've been so inactive on here atm but I'm so happy that the first thing I see when I logged in was a post by jester reblogged by wits #I hope you both are doing good <3 #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd manga #bsd kenji #bsd kunikida

[ckjbun]

The Day I Picked Up Dazai Spoilers (1)

I translated the first few pages of the new Dazai novel, which was given out as free bonus for those who come to the cinema to watch the BEAST live action movie in Japan.

Please carefully read the notes below before progressing.

- This post contains spoilers. It is not a summary, but a full translation of the first few pages of novel. So if you plan to read the novel later yourself and think this would ruin your expectation, please stop here.

· I tried to keep the translation as accurate as possible, but as I don't speak English or Japanese as my native language, I may make some mistakes or use weird words etc. This translation might not be final. I may come back and fix it later if I find any mistakes.

· This is a moviegoers-only benefit, so please be extra careful when discussing it about on Twitter. Use a #spoiler tag on your tweets or your fanarts. You can share the links to this post but don't take many screenshots. Don't retranslate it. Don’t repost this anywhere else out of Tumblr.

· DON’T GO TO THE AUTHORS’ OR OFFICIAL TWITTERS TO COMMENT ABOUT THE CONTENTS OF IT.

I'm sorry if that's too much but honestly all I want is for everyone to have a good experience, for those who wants to read the novels to be able to read the novels, and for those who don't want to be spoiled, to be safe from it as much as possible.

If you have read and are okay with all the above, please continue to move forward and enjoy the novel. Have a good day!

A bloody corpse of a young man is lying on my front porch.

I look down at the corpse, then at the front of the house. It is a quiet morning. The apartment across the street is casting a long black shadow on the pavement in front of me. The trumpet vines planted in the hedge are rustling in the breeze, and whispering to each other in a way that human cannot decipher. Somewhere in the distance, I can hear the sound of the long-distance trucks scraping against the road surface. And there is a corpse in the middle of the stairs in front of me.

In any case, to our eyes, a corpse is always a strangely exaggerated presence. But this time it is different. This corpse blends in with the landscape, becoming one with the everyday peaceful morning scenery. After a while, I realize the reason. The corpse’s chest is moving up and down faintly. It is not a corpse, it is alive.

I look at the young man. He is all black. A high-collar black cloak, a three-piece suit, a black tie. The things that are not black are his button-down shirt, and the bandages around his head. This one is a mottled color of white and red. This color pattern reminds me of some ominous Chinese prophetic characters. The place he is lying, is the middle of the stairs that leads to the front porch. The blood stains continuing down the cracked concrete stairs looks like he has been crawling.

Question. What should I do with this nearly-corpse in front of my eyes?

The answer is simple. If I touch him with the tip of my toes and put some weight on him, he will just roll down to the ground below. If I do so, then he will not be on my premise anymore. He will be on a public road. The country’s territory. All those who are in trouble within the territory of the country should be saved by the mercy of the country. An ordinary postman like me should go home and have breakfast.

I am not doing that because I am a cold and heartless person. I am doing that because it is a survival necessity. The young man’s wounds are clearly from gunshots. He has been shot multiple times. There are probably more holes in his body than I can see from here. And to top it all off, he is holding a bunch of new notes in his left hand.

What can this mean? Nothing. It means nothing, except that his existence is a huge trouble, and that nothing good will come out of getting involved with him. In other words, he is clearly not someone that an average citizen should get involved with. A normal person in his right mind should have fled to the next city at the sight of him. Just like Jonah in the Bible would do the second time he runs into a giant fish in a stormy sea.

I look at the young man, at the road, and the sky, and at him again.

And then I start to act. First, I approach the guy and lift him up by his sides. Then I drag him by his heels into the house and lay him down on the wall-mounted bed. He is much lighter than he looks. Carrying him alone is not that much of a trouble. I check his wounds. There are many deep wounds, and the bleeding is not usual, but if he receives immediate proper treatment, it is not like he will die.

I take out my medical kit box from the back of the closet, and give him some simple first aid treatments. I put a towel under his upper body, cut his clothes with a pair of scissors to expose the wounds, and check if there is any bullet left inside. In order to stop the blood flow, I apply pressure on the pressure points: below the armpits, inner elbows, ankles, backs of knees, and tie them tightly with a clean cloth. Then I put disinfected tourniquets to the wounds to stop the bleeding. Fortunately for him, I can do this kind of first aid even with my eyes closed.

After I am done with the treatments, I look down at the young man and cross my arms. His breathing has stabilized. His respiratory system and bones seem to be intact. But he does not seem to be waking up. “It’s fine already, just kick him out.” I can hear the voice in my head. There is nothing more stupid than treating a suspicious guy like this. I guess I should listen to that voice. That is what a wise man would do.

Before following the angels’ advice, I take another look at the young man. I don’t recognize his face. Probably not someone I know. I say probably, because the bandages covering half of his face makes it almost impossible to make out his features. But he is much younger than what I first thought. He is probably young enough to pass as a “boy”.

Then I remember the wad of cash he was holding. He is still holding them. If it is actually as much as it looks, it must be a fortune for someone with a miserably cheap wage like me. In this situation, it should be okay to have some of them gently transferred to my pocket as a thank for saving his life, right? Thinking so, I pick up the wad of notes. And now I finally realize that I am the biggest idiot in this town.

I feel a bitter taste spreading inside my mouth.

That is an unused bundle of notes. There is some blood on them, but the paper strap, the proof that they are new, is there. There is no bank’s name printed on the strap. There is no printing of any kind. And the notes are neatly lined up by serial numbers in ascending order.

I feel like someone just punched me in the stomach.

There are two possibilities that I can think of. First, this bundle of notes has been taken out of the Reserve Bank of Japan Mint, before it hits the market. That would mean this man is a plague. There is no chance that an ordinary person could get his hands on such a thing. The notes printed at Japan Mint are first sent to the Ministry of Finance, where their serial numbers are scanned to become usable notes. Then they will be sent in cash transport vehicles to branches of the Reserve Bank. From there, they continue to be subdivided and distributed to city banks. At that point, the straps will be switched with those of the city banks.

However, there is no printing on his trap at all. The only way to be able to carry out a wad of notes in that state is to steal it from the Reserve Bank. The most likely way is to attack a cash transport car. Could it be that he just returned from a raid like that?

But if so, I will just stroke my chest in relief, and go back to making coffee in my kitchen. The cash car robbers are violent guys, but only violent. Violence alone cannot make a storm.

There is another possibility.

These are counterfeit notes. I take out a magnifying glass from the back of the room, and carefully examine the wad of notes in my hand. I become complete chilled that my fingers are tingling. I try comparing them with the notes in my own wallet. I can’t tell the difference at all.

A supernote.

I feel dizzy.

If that is the case, the thing in my hand right now has become as dangerous as a small nuclear warhead. Counterfeit currency is a tool of warfare that has been used way before bows and arrows. If one can bring an amount of well-made false currency into an enemy country, the value of that currency will drop due to the increase amount of money in circulation, leading to inflation. A country is, in a sense, its own currency. By skillfully fueling distrust in a country’s currency, it is possibly to destroy the economy and bring down a whole nation. For that reason, the National Security Agency is always on the lookout for counterfeit notes. If this level of a note is to be brought into the market, it would not be the city police’s business. It is much higher. The National Security Agency, or the Military.

I put the wad of notes on my desk as if I am throwing them away. I don’t want to leave my fingerprints on them anymore. I head to the phone. If I report the incident right away, I might be able to argue for some extenuating circumstances with the authorities. There is no time to waste.

When I pick up the receiver, I hear a faint voice. It isn’t coming from the phone.

“Put the phone down.”

I turn to the direction where the voice came from. Before I knew it, the young man has opened his eyes and is looking at me with those eyes. I look at the receiver and the youth in turn. Then I say, “What if I don’t?”

“I kill you.”

Those words are as mediocre as the unsold leftover packs lining up in a deli, at least to this young man. I can tell from looking at his eyes. When he utters the word “kill”, it is nothing more than an ordinary, everyday word for him. Just like cutting your nails, or going out to buy more cigarettes, those kinds of words.

“How?” I put down the receiver, but I have not returned it to the base station. Then I say, “You’ve got holes all over your body. You can’t move anything. You’re dying everywhere. You don’t even have a gun. To kill me in that condition, it would take two hundred of you.”

“I don’t need that much.” He says with a chilled voice. “I’m Port Mafia.”

Those words only are enough.

“Port Mafia”, I carefully choose my words before saying “Then I have no choice but to obey.” Then I take my time and quietly put the receiver down.

“That’s good,” he chuckles.

If he really is from Port Mafia, I would have to be careful even about lifting or lowering a spoon in front of him. When the opponent is the Port Mafia, the synonym of darkness and violence, even if I report this and manage to escape today, there is no telling what will come later. A human being has a total of about two hundred bones. But it would not be strange if I will be shredded into just as many pieces of flesh.

I stare at him for about three seconds. Then I go to the kitchen. I keep the door open so that I can watch him from there. I start making coffee in the kitchen. I put the kettle on the fire and wet the rod with some water. I add the coffee powder, and pour boiling water in.

“If I’m not allowed to call the police, what about the doctors?” I say, keeping my eyes on the water.

“What I’ve done is just emergency first aids at best. If you don’t get checked by a proper doctor, you will die soon.”

“No need to worry.” The young man speaks with a slightly stretched out voice. “This much is no big deal. I’m used to injuries.”

“Is that so? Then I will obey.” I stir the coffee and set a timer. “In any case, there is no way a normal postman like me can go against the Port Mafia demons.”

“Being obedient is good. So next…”

Suddenly, the young man starts coughing and vomits blood. I quickly run up to him and turn his head to the side so that he will not choke on his own blood. I check inside his mouth. I can’t tell where the bleeding is from in this situation. It could be just a cut inside his mouth, or it could be an internal injury. I don’t know.

“Go to the hospital. Get treatments. You are really going to die.” I state.

“It’s perfect then.” he speaks like whispering. “Just let me die like this.”

I feel a chilled wind passing through me.

I look at the young man. He is just staring at the ceiling. No emotions, no intents. Just a flat expression, like one who is just telling his age. I cannot believe my own eyes. I don’t even feel like there is a human there. If it was late night, I would think that he was a ghost or a hallucination.

Crazy things keep happening today. My life is about to get screwed up it seems.

“Fine then.” I say. “If you want to die, just die. It’s your own life. I won’t stop you. But I will be in trouble if you die here. If you die here, no one will be able to testify that I am not the one who caused your injuries. I might be arrested.”

“To be arrested, or to be killed by Port Mafia later, which one is better?’

I stare at him while saying, “That’s a hard question.”

I go back to the kitchen, wait for the timer and turn off the fire. I then take out the cream can and ask, “You want some coffee?”

No answer.

“How did you collapse in front of my house?”

Still no answer.

“What the heck are those notes in your hand?”

No answer for this one of course.

I feel as if I’m talking to a wind fairy. A character from a picture book who suddenly came to my house on a peaceful morning. Just that he is covered in blood, and he wants to die.

I pour coffee into two cups and add in the cream. I watch the steam, wait for some time and start stirring. Then I notice that I can’t feel the sign of anyone in the next room anymore. I can’t even hear him breathing. No hint of death drifting either.

I poke my head out of the door, the cups still in my hand. The young man is crawling towards the front door. If he could move his legs, he would just walk out. But it looks like he hasn’t got that much strength back, so he just has his arms hooked on the floor and slowly creeping forward. Just like a prisoner escaping from cell in those old war movies.

He notices my gaze, and then as if he has given up, a mocking smile appears on his face.

“You don’t want me to die in this house, do you? Then if I leave, you’ll have nothing to do with it. No need to help me. No need to ponder anything. Just stay there and watch.”

I ask him, still holding the coffee, “Do you want to die that much?”

“Of course I do. I joined the Port Mafia, but there was still nothing.” replies the young man in a voice that sounds like a soul-deprived gasp. “The only thing I want now, is death.”

Then he starts crawling again.

I take a sip of my coffee while watching that. His progress is pathetically slow. I take another sip. He keeps moving without a rest. He has no intent to look back at me anymore.

There is only one thing to do.

“It’s no use to stop me.” The young man seems to notice my movement. He says with his eyes looking forward, “No one can go against the Port Mafia. And no one in the Port Mafia can go against me. In other words, no one can whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!??”

He is pulled backward.

I wrap him with a bed sheet and lift him up. I then twist the two ends to close it. Like a candy wrapping paper. Then I turn him upside down and carry him back.

“It hurts it hurts it hurts! My wounds are opening! What the hell are you doing, you blockhead. You want to be killed?”

“I don’t want to be killed. But I don’t want to let you die either. If you go out in this state, you will definitely die. Just make up a death story without me in it when you get better.”

As it looks like he is going to let out more complaint, I shake the lump of cloth.

“Ouch ouch! Stop it! I hate pains!!”

“Then will you give up?”

“No!”

I try to come up with a way to deal with it and I get one. Let’s tie him to the bed.

I put him down on the bed and open the pack. I bring in a big towel and wrap it around his arms, which are crossed in front of his chest, altogether with his torso. I take the decorative cord from the door way to bind his legs together and tie the ends to the metal fittings of the bed. I raise the pillows, change the blanket into a new one, and open the window to let the fresh air in.

“For the time being, until your wounds have healed, I will have you stay like that.” I look down to the young man and say “Is there anything you want?”

“My nose is itching.” He looks at me resentfully while wriggling his two arms that are no longer free.

“Poor you.” I go back to the coffee in the kitchen.

The young man’s insults are echoing behind my back. But this neighborhood is sparsely populated, so there is no need to worry about disturbing the neighbors. I enjoy my morning coffee.

And so begins the strange and short communal life of me and Dazai together.

...

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #spoiler #spoilers #bsd spoilers #side A spoilers

[ckjbun]

BEAST Movie Spoilers

So I did watch the early show on Dec 20, but I wanted to wait till the official release date to post this. Please make sure to read the followings before moving forward.

· This post contains spoilers, a lot of spoilers, and might be pretty detailed. Please don’t read it if you plan to watch the movie later and think that it will ruin your experience.

· There might be a few parts that I missed or didn’t remember clearly. I try to keep it as accurate as possible but I may come back after watching the movies more and fix things if necessary.

· The movie just came out today in Japan, so please be extra careful when discussing it on Twitter. Do not take too many screenshots. If you want to share it with someone, you can link them to this post. Don't repost this anywhere else out of Tumblr. I actually don't have any clear rules I just don’t want to be noticed because a lot of Japanese fans also use Twitter so please understand :(

· DON’T GO TO THE AUTHORS’ OR OFFICIAL TWITTERS TO COMMENT ABOUT THE CONTENTS OF THE MOVIE, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. HAVE SOME RESPECTS.

If you are okay with all the above, feel free to move on to the spoilers. I just wrote down whatever I remember, mainly the parts where the movie is different from the novel.

HEAVY SPOILERS AHEAD

· The movie didn’t show much of Akutagawa background as a kid. It started with his friends being killed and Akutagawa running off to avenge them. In the movie, Gin took a bullet for her brother.

· We didn’t get to see the scene where Oda found Akutagawa at the river bank on screen, but we got a scene of them eating curry together.

· The whole thing about Akutagawa collecting ADA’s approval stamp did not happen in the movie. The movie kept the babysitting scene and it was really sweet. He looked like a big brother to them, carrying them and asking them to help with housework etc.

· The house where the children stay was also attacked and the uncle also got stabbed in the movie. They made it look like what happened in Dark Era, only that this time Aku and Kenji appeared in time to save the kids from the kidnappers. (Honestly my heart skipped a beat here cuz I didn’t know what was going to happen to the kids).

· There was no farming scene with Kenji, but we had a new scene where Aku and Kenji met an old lady on the street, who commented on how thin Aku is then gave him a lot of stuff, telling him to eat up. He was so happy his eyes were shining.

· Kyouka in BEAST still loves crepes but no dates for her and Atsushi here ☹

· Oda is still friends with Ango. Ango works for the government and is Oda’s informant. He was the one who gave Oda information about the “man in black” that Aku was looking for. In the novel, it is said that Oda spent 3 days to look for a video of a secret meeting between Dazai and the government, so that Aku can confirm his face. In the movie, Oda also did that, but we got to see him actually breaking into the place and fighting the guards etc. That was when he met Fyodor, who gave him the data, but also slightly poisoned him (almost by the same method Ango did in Dark Era) as a warning.

· The video Oda got was not of a secret meeting as in the novel, but a video of Dazai and Chuuya 6 years ago (?) when they were fighting Shibusawa. In order to stop Shibusawa, Dazai told Chuuya to use Arahabaki but Chuuya didn’t want to because he couldn’t trust Dazai. Dazai then stabbed himself in the leg (not sure why he did that? Maybe to prove he won’t run away? I will have to watch the movie again and come back later). He asked Chuuya to believe him and said something along the line of “To protect this world, I cannot lose either Chuuya or Port Mafia.”

· There were quite of a few of flashbacks from Dark Era in Dazai’s mind. And those flashbacks always ended with him waking up in his office in BEAST.

· Dazai in the movie couldn’t keep his cool in the bar scene, as he did in the novel. He was already so emotional the moment he saw Oda. Oda was really indifferent to him in this scene. He pointed the gun at Dazai upon finding out that he was the Mafia boss, and later even put the gun on Dazai’s forehead when saying “Don’t call me Odasaku.” Dazai was on the verge of tear the whole time he delivered his last goodbye.

· Gin was really going to be executed in the movie, but the ADA came to rescue her and Aku. She also tried to kill herself with a gun (probably because she hast lost all hopes) but was stopped by Yosano. Ranpo appeared for the first time in this scene.

· In the scene where Dazai jumped, Oda was seen in the bar holding the lighter and looking up as if he could sense something.

· Atsu left PM with Kyouka as per Dazai’s order but he didn’t meet with Mori in the movie. Sometime later, he was called to a government prison (?) by Chuuya. Apparently after Dazai’s death, Chuuya became the boss. He went on a rampage (which Atsu wondered happened because of Dazai’s death) so he was captured and chained up by the government. Chuuya talked about how much of a trash Dazai was, how he looked down on people with his multiple personalities and how it was the worst of the worst to be teamed up with him etc. He waited 7 years to kill Dazai but Dazai went and died without a reason. Chuuya then told Atsushi to start a battle of revenge against the ADA, to erase ADA’s name from the phonebook and the map. Because the Mafia will have no face if they let the organization that caused the death of its previous boss to keep operating like nothing happened. Atsushi refused but Chuuya said Kyouka has accepted the offer. Atsushi then said maybe it is also Dazai’s plan for Chuuya to fight the ADA. Chuuya laughed and said something along the line of “So that mean if we keep fighting the ADA, it’s like Dazai is alive? (I’m really not sure what he means in this part. Maybe I misheard something so I will confirm later when I rewatch the movie). Or you don’t want to take revenge for Dazai?”. And Atsushi’s eyes looked fired up when he heard that. We didn’t get to know what happened after that.

· In the last scene, Fyodor was watching a footage of Dazai jumping off the building. It seems like he also knows the truth now. He told his subordinate that the next targets will be Atsushi and Akutagawa because having so many people know the truth will make the world unstable. He said he is okay with being the only one who knows the truth. And in the last scene of the movie, Fyodor said that what happens next will be the battle to save the world and told the viewers to look forward to it.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd spoilers #spoilers #beast movie #beast movie spoilers

[ckjbun]

Re-upload

#bsd 55 minutes #bsd nakajima atsushi #bsd dazai osamu #bsd kunikida doppo #bungou stray dogs #bsd #bungo stray dogs

[ckjbun]

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs

[ckjbun]

What was Fyodor doing in the movie Beast?

He played cello and played the guy who knows everything lol

#bsd #beast movie #beast movie spoilers #spoilers

[ckjbun]

How was the movie? I saw your tweet about the last added scene and was wondering what it specifically looked like? I would really like to support the movie myself but I do not live in the US.

The movie is okay. The action scenes are great, the actings were on-point and they made a lot of adjustments to make it more cinematic.

I do not like some parts of it because it feels like they were trying too hard to cover too many characters in a short amount of time. And I don’t really like the way it ended, if I am to compare it with the novel ending. The novel definitely makes more sense to me.

About that last scene, I don't really want to spoil any more than what I already did on Twitter. I also didn't catch all the lines spoken in that scene so I need to watch it a few more times before being able to say anything for sure. However I think that's a scene that Chuuya's fans, skk's fans, and maybe Ue-chan (the actor)'s fans would love to see.

#bsd #spoilers #beast movie #bsd spoilers

[ckjbun]

Bungo Stray Dogs the Movie: BEAST Theater Attendee Benefits

BSD Movie Official released a news about a benefit for those who’ll attend the premiere of the BEAST movie. They are two new novels written by Asagiri with the title “Bungo Stray Dogs: The Day I Picked Up Dazai” (literal meaning).

Novel Side-A (Dazai Osamu & No Longer Human written cover) - First Week (Jan 7) Novel Side-B (Oda Sakunosuke & Flawless written cover) - Second week (Jan 14)

#asagiri kafka #bsd beast #bungou stray dogs beast #beast movie #bsd live action movie #bsd light novel #bungou stray dogs

[ckjbun]

「文豪ストレイドッグス 太宰を拾った日」Side-A • Side-B

What you can find on both covers will (probably) not help you to find any clue on the novels: the text comes from irl Oda Sakunosuke’s 天衣無縫 and from irl Dazai Osamu’s 人間失格.

天衣無縫：https://www.aozora.gr.jp/cards/000040/files/47052_32363.html

人間失格：https://www.aozora.gr.jp/cards/000035/files/301_14912.html

… I wonder if we will get some (spicy) curry scenes… 🍛（笑）

#NEW LIGHT NOVEL EVERYONE #ABOUT DAZAI #I AM EXCITED #bsd dazai #bsd odasaku #bsd light novel #bungou stray dogs

[ckjbun]

hey idgaf about how you feel about the bsd characters, but don’t ever apply those feelings towards the irl authors. people have edited nakahara-sensei’s wikipedia page to have dazai-sensei as his husband. someone else is spreading misinfo that mori-sensei tried to destroy yosano-sensei’s work, despite how they were very close. those people are NOT the characters, so stop viewing them like they are.

this isn’t funny or factual. you are blatantly disrespecting the dead all because of your feelings toward some fictional characters. some lines and pixels that are NOT 1:1 representations of the authors.

#bungou stray dogs

[ckjbun]

Leftover Chicken Chazuke from Bungou Stray Dogs

We’ve been in an ochazuke mood lately, since I’ve been busy (2 jobs + an opera), and this is something that can be whipped up in 5-10 mins! (Not counting the time spent cooking the rice.)

Shokugeki no Souma’s Mackerel Onigiri Chazuke still tastes better, in my opinion, with lots more umami, but we can’t really compare genius chefs to something made furtively in an orphanage, can we? This one would be better for people who like sour food though.

Ingredients (for 2)

1 piece breast or thigh

3 tbsp soy sauce (for marinade)

1 cup rice

2 pickled plums (umeboshi) - 1 per bowl.

Seaweed strips, for garnish

1 teapot salted kelp tea (given by @hungryleow​)

Method

Chop the chicken into bite-sized pieces and marinate in soy sauce.

Meanwhile, set the rice to cook on the stove or in a rice cooker.

When the rice is almost done, grill/ pan fry the chicken till cooked/browned.

Scoop the rice into bowls and place the chicken on top.

Make the salted kelp tea and pour over the chicken and rice

Top with the pickled plum (umeboshi) and garnish with the seaweed strips.

Serve!

(Optional step) Make more bowls and eat them all until you don’t want to eat any more for the next 10 years.

Ninja Note 1: I love how all the characters are named after authors, and have special abilities that link to their books! I’m more familiar with the english ones though. Looking forward to authors from more nationalities!

Ninja note 2: I regret not lining up the wood grain of my table arghhh guess I might have to make this again to take a better picture

See my Recipe Archive here!

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd food

[ckjbun]

Because Kunikida is our King!

So! Even if I probably don't fit a single one of Kuni's ideal partner requisites, I felt like writing a character analysis that's pretty much a love letter to him. What can I say, he's one of my favorites.

It has to be said: the first impression is not the best. He acts rather callous, especially in comparison to the friendly Dazai, towards our destitute hero; even if he is the one who actually pays for his lunch. But he is very professional: he is there to capture a tiger, and if he meets someone who has seen it, he will be very serious with the interrogation and annoyed about Atsushi's terrified behavior.

Sure, he soon gets his comical side exposed as a natural result of being stuck working with Dazai; but of all the Agency, he is the one who give the cold shoulder to Atsushi the most, lacking the friendly demeanor the others have.

But that is not to say he's completely indifferent: he dedicates himself to a mentor role in a way different from Dazai, warning him about Akutagawa, getting him to work with Ranpo and Kenji to expose him to different working styles.

Despite this, he appears to be one of the most willing to leave Atsushi and Kyouka to their fates during the Mafia arc. At first, it seems to be because he doesn't care: the reason he gives for not saving Atsushi is that the Agency already has its hands full, and looks rather shocked when Fukuzawa gives the order to drop everything and save their newest member.

But it's not quite like that. When he finally finds Atsushi, and hears that the kid wants to throw away his chance to saving himself to protect someone else, he loses it: he yells that he can't save everybody, it's an unrealistic ideal, and he knows this because he too failed many times and is still haunted by regrets.

This is where his main character conflict first comes to light. Insofar, his 'ideals' were little more than a comic relief, something to underline his stringiness. From here on, we'll start to see how important they are to him and for his character arc.

We see at the end of the Guild arc that he isn't completely inflexible and stern. He complains about Atsushi's solo operation, but he is still more than willing to recognize that the kid really managed to save the situation.

But then chapter 40 rolls in, and that's practically a character study of him.

He starts the day by preparing a schedule in which he calculated how to fit all of his activities down to the very second. He valiantly ignores all temptations of trasgression (Dazai was doing all he could to plague his existence, and this included calling everyone Kuni admired to call them at the Agency and distract him) ... and then he sees a little girl getting handed a bomb.

He demonstrates that he's not a monster to drop the schedule and rush defusing the bomb; as a reward, he's stuck with the little girl, who insist to look for the criminal alongside him and keeps criticizing him right on his weak spots (cioè che una donna non la vede manco col binocolo). He's saved by the retrieval of more bombs, on a railroad this time.

The situation degenerates shortly afterwards. Another bomb gets strapped on the girl, he gets took out and bound. The culprit is some guy who Kunikida had arrested in an earlier case: he had tried to encourage him to rebuild his life, but the guy wasn't encouraged; rather, he developed a grudge towards Kunikida, and decided to do something that would have destroyed his ideals.

And this is where we find about his core belief: not let anyone die in front of his. I admit,I'm extremely curious about his backstory and how he developed this line of thinking. In the early chapters, it is said that he worked as an algebra instructor while attending university: a rather 'safe' occupation, I doubt that exposed him to people dying in front of him, so did he develope these ideals after he joined the Agency? But if it is so, why did he join such a dangerous occupation in the first place?

Anyways, the bomber's plan is to stick him in a situation where he will have no choice but to see someome die in front of him. He even gets to choose who, in a variation on the trolley dilemma: the switch to deactivate the bomb on the girl activates the bomb on the rails, so it's either the little girl in front of him or a multitude of strangers. Kunikida takes it with a rather grim attitude: he is the first to admit that his ideals are bound to clash against realities. 

Nevertheless, he'll follow them as best as he can: he'll sacrifice the lesser number of people possible, the girl and himself, for not having been able to prevent this.

Except that nobody dies, because in all of this chaos, he had managed to sneak a distress signal to Yosano, who in turn called the police and rushed to heal everyone.

The chapter concludes with the reveal that Kunikida is the successor for the role of director of the Agency: Ranpo and Dazai have more brainpower, but to lead others, to inspire them to be their better self, this is something only Kunikida can do in there.

But is Kunikida confident in this? As we'll see in the Cannibalism arc, the answer is a sound no.

When Fukuzawa is taken down and the building is surrounded by the Port Mafia, he goes into a panic. He has troubles coming up with a plan that will result in no casualties, and as a result, Ranpo makes a schism, bringing most of the Agency save Atsushi with him. Kunikida finds himself alone, and here starts the collective kink of BSD's villains for torturing him.

Fyodor is the biggest offender: he starts by killing Katai, one of Kunikida's oldest friends, even if that had more strategic reasons than a personal attack. But what follows is something very personal: he finds some idiot willing to give weapons to children to defend him while he runs away, and has the Agency mistake him for the Pushkin they are pursuing. Kuni already is forced to harm the kids, if he doesn't want himself and Atsushi killed. But the real deal is the little girl with the granate.

Fyodor literally instructed her to kill herself if Kunikida showed her the notebook - exactly what he did, thinking of doing a funny trick to calm her down. He becomes unwittingly responsible for the death of the little girl, right in front of his eyes.

Kunikida is crushed by this. He works tirelessly until the end of the arc so that the girl's death will not be in vain; after that, he lets himself be accused and arrested for it, without protesting his innocence, because he doesn't believe it himself. As Ranpo says, this is part of the enemy's plan: Kunikida is the moral pillar of the Agency, the one they would have target first to discourage the others and leave them without support.

After this, he is released to go straight into the Decay of Angels case. Where his ideals are challenged once again: right at the start of the arc, when they were trying to save those politicians, he was the one to come up with the plan of beheading the criminals from behind with Kyouka's Ability. He clearly is not happy about this, saying that otherwise the ostages will be killed: yet another case in which his ideals clash with reality.

And this is only the beginning. The Book works its magic, turning the ADA into terrorists; they are forced to flee from the police, and Kunikida finds himself called a traitor and nearly shot by a policeman. The way he reacts is very interesting: he becomes very aggressive in the first moment, and later on he realizes that it's because that personwas clearly someone righteous, who lived for justice just like he did. Does this, and his reaction, mean that Kunikida is already a monster?

He is snapped out of this way of thinking by Kenji, and later goes to give an informative example of ethical car stealth.

The 'let's use Kunikida's ideals to torture him' trend continues; this time the offender is Jouno, who manages a similar effect to what Fyodor did with just a few words.

Or rather, even better. Because Jouno doesn't make him question his ability to stand by his ideals, he gets him to doubt the ideals themselves and his relationship to them. He has failed, and this means can accept he's a failure and live without the weight of them. Even if this means that the rest of the Agency will die.

This mere insinuation is enough to shake Kunikida to the core. Is it possible that he can feel any relief from the death of his friends? This question would horrify anyone, let alone someone like him. To stave it off, he literally jumps at the chance to sacrifice himself, with a nice heroic moment that would shut down his existential crisis along with his life. Dazai would be proud! (jk)

And he fails. His failure is on all fronts: he doesn't manage to prevent the ADA members from being captured (at least in the mid-run), he lost his hands that were necessary for the use of his Ability, and he didn't even manage to die. And his crisis is still there, worse than before, because now the scenario proposed by Jouno is real.

And well, it doesn't really receive an answer. He tells Jouno to leave, and has a complete breakdown, after which he is saved by Ranpo and reunited with the rest of the Agency, miraculously safe and sound, with no other words on the subject.

Well, kinda. Did he cry out of relief at being with his colleagues again, or out of stress and guilt at what he found himself thinking?

So, what can be said about all that?

Kunikida's Ideals are a double-edged sword. On the one hand, they easily make him one of the most moral people in the manga. And they don't give him a simplified, black-and white view of morality: see how he encouraged Rokuro, a criminal, to turn his life around; see how he is willing to kill criminals, but only in situation that give him no other resort, with a grim acceptation. His ideals are positive: to save and protect others.

The negative aspect of them is not an hypocrital harm to other people in their name: it’s that they harm Kunikida himself. As Jouno put best, his Ideals are as high and lofty as a balloon: too much for a simple human being, such as Kunikida is, to follow them. No matter how he tries, no matter how he does everything in his power to follow them, sooner or later he will fail, and when this happens he is unable to get back on his own. Remember how he had to be taken from his self-loathing spiral by Ranpo in both cases? He has had other things to concentrate on since, and he hasn’t had actual time to elaborate on what his failures actually means. 

And this is actually after some character development: do you remember when he didn’t try to save Kyouka, already prepping Atsushi to failure before he even tried? His ideals can have another downside: they can lead him to a defeatist attitude, giving up before even trying to avoid confronting failure.

Kunikida is probably the most genuinely heroic character in the series, one whose greatest desire is to help others; but he still has quite some road to do before he can truly be the new leader of the Agency. 

Thanks to anyone who bothered to read my ramblings!

[ckjbun]

Happy 9th Anniversary

It’s been 9 years since the series start serializing. Wishing Asagiri, Harukawa, other manga artists, and staff involved congrats for reaching success thus far & keeping the story going.