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Reid: You know my motto: carpe diem, carpe noctem, carpe coles.

Morgan: Seize the day, seize the night, what’s the last one?

Reid: Seize the dick.

#incorrect criminal minds #incorrect moreid #moreid #spencer reid #derek morgan #drunk reid strikes again

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Sam: We should get you to a doctor for a check up immediately. What if it happens again, and there isn’t anyone around to help you? What if it’s congenital? Oh my God! Was it me? Did I hurt you?

Gabriel: …You realize any other person that made their partner pass out on bed would simply feel really proud of themselves, right?

#incorrect supernatural quotes #incorrect sabriel #sabriel #sabriel spn #i know this blog is for cm #but this is just so them #anyways guess whos back #cm hyperfixation round 2 bb

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Reid, talking to Fran: No, Mrs. Morgan. We didn't even have a real wedding, we went to the courthouse on a Thursday.

Morgan: The judge sentenced me to life with no chance of parole.

Reid: You begged me to marry you.

Morgan: It's true, I did.

#incorrect criminal minds #incorrect moreid #moreid #spencer reid #derek morgan #source: tiktok #i think

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*Reid and Morgan talking about Wii Tennis*

Morgan: I'm going to beat you next time.

Reid: I won. Twice.

Morgan: The first one was a tie!

Reid: And the second time?

Morgan: ...

Morgan: There were no witnesses to the second time.

#incorrect criminal minds #spencer reid #derek morgan #incorrect moreid #moreid #source: tumblr #reid is surprisingly good at wii sports resort #its bc he knows all the math to winning #and doesnt have to actually do sport stuff #morgan is salty

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Reid: You and Hotch are having a baby.

Rossi: I'm sorry??

Reid, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's me, sign here.

#UR BRAIN>>> #UR SO RIGHT

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Reid's flirting: If I were a painter, you would be my muse. Although, even with all the talent in the world, with the highest quality paint, the most luxurious brush, the best canvas, I wouldn't be able to capture your beauty. Most of your grace would slip through my fingers, and even then, scholars hundreds of years in the future would marvel at your likeness. They would debate whether you were real or an idealized sketch of perfection. Divinity out there, if there be any, could not create anything out there that rivals your allure if it were given millenia to prepare."

Morgan's flirting: Damn, did you suddenly developed healthy eating habits? Your ass is looking more and more irresistible everyday!

#incorrect criminal minds #spencer reid #derek morgan #incorrect moreid #moreid #this is more headcannon than incorrect quotes #ehhhh #whatever #reid is actually super romantic once hes confident in the relationship

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Doyle gets down on one knee

Prentiss: Oh my god, it's finally happening!

Doyle falls over

Prentiss: The poison is kicking in!

#incorrect criminal minds #emily prentiss #ian doyle #source: tumblr

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Morgan: This snow got me feeling some type of way.

Hotch: It's hypothermia.

Reid: He tried insisting it was "the magic of christmas" to the paramedics.

#incorrect criminal minds #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #spencer reid #incorrect moreid #moreid #source: tumblr #hotch: your bf's an idiot #reid: trust me. i know

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Prentiss: Small creatures are way more aggressive because all their anger has less room to bottle up in.

Rossi: What? That doesn't make any sense! Do you even have examples or are you talking out your ass?

Prentiss: Spiders.

Hotch: Wasps.

Reid: Morgan.

#incorrect criminal minds #emily prentiss #david rossi #aaron hotchner #spencer reid #derek morgan #incorrect moreid #moreid #source: tumblr #morgan: FOR FUCKS SAKE

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Prentiss: You know you've made it when you see your picture up everywhere you go.

Reid: Those are wanted posters.

Reid: And those are commemorating you death.

#incorrect criminal minds #emily prentiss #spencer reid #source: tumblr

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*After The Reid and JJ Fight™*

Morgan: If we put those two in a room, who do you think would come out crying first?

Prentiss: Oh, God, I don't know.

Hotch: The room.

#incorrect criminal minds #derek morgan #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #spencer reid #jennifer jareau #source: tumblr #still not over that fight

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Rossi: Why are you on the floor?

Reid: I'm depressed.

Reid: Also I was stabbed, can you get Hotch, please?

#incorrect criminal minds #spencer reid #david rossi #aaron hotchner #source: tumblr

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Morgan, telling a story: Y'know, when I was small-

Reid, grinning: "Was"?

#incorrect criminal minds #spencer reid #derek morgan #incorrect moreid #moreid #source: tumblr #reid has like half an inch on morgan #and he brings it up every opportunity he gets #OF HEIGHT #HALF AN INCH OF HEIGHT

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Prentiss: A man once told me to put on more clothes.

Reid: Really? Sexual harassment dates back to before women were allowed to wear revealing clothing. How silly is that? The idea that they need to be "allowed"?

Prentiss: Exactly!

Rossi: I feel like that's not the end of the story.

Prentiss: You're right. I wore his skin.

#incorrect criminal minds #emily prentiss #spencer reid #david rossi #source: tiktok #based off that one audio #anyway #spencers my fav feminist #and you know he is #with a single mom and reading works by both men and women

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Reid: You and Hotch are having a baby.

Rossi: I'm sorry??

Reid, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's me, sign here.

#incorrect criminal minds #spencer reid #david rossi #aaron hotchner #source: tumblr #hotch running into the room: I HAVE THE PEN!!

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Hotch: While I’m gone, Emily, you’re in charge.

Prentiss: Yes!!!

Hotch, whispering: JJ, you’re secretly in charge.

JJ: Obviously.

#incorrect criminal minds #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #source: tumblr #jentiss #is that their ship name?? #jemily #THATS IT

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Reid, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him?

Morgan, jumping behind the desk furthest from him: You did WHAT–

Prentiss: William Snakepeare

#incorrect criminal minds #spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #incorrect moreid #moreid #source: tumblr #morgan and his fear of snakes