So my 16 year old little sister moved out of my mom's house basically in the middle of the night a few weeks ago because she had been smoking and drinking and whatnot and finally told my mom and my mom said no more and she didn't like that.
Anyways we went to my mom's tonight for my brother's birthday and I had to go to Heidi's room to get my cds that she borrowed before she left and her room was so empty.
I came back home and told my dad that it was really sad being in heidi's room, and he's like well that's just the way it is. I swear to god he just doesn't get it. Like we've had this conversation before, I KNOW THIS IS THE WAY IT IS AND I KNOW HEIDI IS GOING TO DO WHAT SHE WANTS BUT I'M STILL ALLOWED TO BE SAD AND UPSET!!
The thing is he's not even her dad, and I just wish he would've been like yeah that probably would've been sad or something. He doesn't know how to handle people who have actual feelings.
Last night I gave my Mom a letter that I was finally able to write about a week ago. Alot of shit came out about my sister the last time I was home for a visit and seeing her finally open up and come clean about all her lies over the past 2 years gave me the courage (after 16 years) to confront what happened to me when I was a kid. My stomach is in knots because I've wanted to tell my Mom for so long and now that she has the letter I know I can't take it back. I don't know what she's going to say and waiting for her to call me is the most nerve wracking thing.
As much as I want to listen to Gorgeous, I'm not allowing myself. I always listen to the first 1 or 2 tracks that Taylor releases before the album, but never more.
And I only do this because my favourite thing to with artists I love is listen to the new album in its entirety after purchase. I guess which songs are going to be my favourite after reading the tracklist and then I just sit and listen and take it all in for the first time. It's like a little piece of magic. I've done this with every Taylor Swift album and I can't wait to feel the magic with Reputation.