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lamelinam · 3 months
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Grumble grumble…
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lamelinam · 3 months
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If I'm scared of A.I? Not at all.
No machine can replicate my feelings, my life story, my fears, my humanity. Learning how to draw by simply and purely trying with my own hands and my own mind give me that much confidence. They can replicate my patterns and learn all my lineworks and brushstrokes, but I'm a human in progress and I know I am capable of surprising myself with different things.
Don't be scare of A.I! Learning to love ourselves and our humanity is what makes us stand out during this time. FEELINGS. MISTAKES. IMPERFECTION. Embrace that about yourself. No machine or technology will ever be like us! They can learn everything, but they can't... be.
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lamelinam · 3 months
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lamelinam · 3 months
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lamelinam · 4 months
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Demons bleed red
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lamelinam · 4 months
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Dreamers
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lamelinam · 4 months
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Once under the joyful hand of Creation, where has all the Innocence fled?
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dust to dust
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lamelinam · 4 months
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Horrifying is not the word she’d use
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lamelinam · 4 months
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lamelinam · 4 months
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…pretty sure these are all canon
Template credit: @methodwriting
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lamelinam · 5 months
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Silco and Jinx by PebblesOfCeti
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lamelinam · 5 months
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The happy ending
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lamelinam · 5 months
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This has got to be my favorite piece that Fortiche posted for Jinx's birthday month. It's just Jinx. We can't tell her true expression, because a mischievous smile (her base reaction?) has obscured her face. Only one of her eyes belongs to this new face, it's not the same shape as Silco's corrupted eye, it's got Jinx's trademark X. And above her head is a crown. Is it a birthday crown for the birthday girl? Fortiche's logo? Or is it Jinx inheriting (accepting) her legacy on a dark throne. Then when we pull out from the image we see this.
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It's all Jinx, it's always been Jinx, and she’s accepted that. She will let it consume her. The fun part is that every Jinx in the picture, the girl, the facade, and the crow are all looking at the viewer thinking what to do with you.
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lamelinam · 5 months
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Insane transition for insane people (me)
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lamelinam · 5 months
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Nothing like watching Arcane to remind me just how quickly I will become morally bankrupt when presented with the right kind of character/dynamic. Because the thing is, Jinx and Silco are not the heroes of this story, they are presented as the villains. At every turn they hurt those around them. They may be motivated to a degree by the wrongs that have been done to them and the oppression put on them by the powerful, but their intentions are far from pure. They’re mean. They’re ruthless. They’re killers. The story makes it clear we should be rooting for characters like Vi, Ekko, Caitlyn, and Vander. But…there is just something so special to me in their characters, something so poetic and poignant. And maybe that’s the point of our villains: the poetry, the irony. Our villains were created by misdeeds of our heroes. And not just innocent, accidental deeds mind you, they were created by anger and the violence and ruthlessness. Our villains are the victims of our heroes. And while that may not truly justify all the bad they’ve done in a strictly moral sense, I just find it hard not to root for them: the victims, the utterly damaged beyond repair, the ones who were not gifted with physical strength but with intelligence and cunning. The ones nobody believed in. And it boils down to the dynamic too. Jinx and Silco. Silco is objectively a terrible person: he’s our villain, after all. But there is something so unconditional in his love for Jinx. An inhuman sort of patience, that not even our good guys possess. Silco loved Jinx and understood her and forgave her and chose her in a way our heroes never did. And that’s why it’s impossible to truly see these characters as complete monsters. Because what’s more human than love and brokenness?
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lamelinam · 6 months
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WoT Meta: Prophecies, Fated Lovers, and Robert Jordan's knack for finding the nuance underneath the myth
One complaint I've never understood about the way Jordan writes romances is the persistent claim that he over uses the 'prophesied love' trope.
In part for me, I think it's a little bit folks not seeing the forest for the trees. WoT is fundamentally about the relationship between myth and reality: the place where the fallen angel meets the disgruntled academic, the bitter accountant, and the man who never got over being too short. It's a story where the messiah is real and dealing with chronic pain and PTSD from his stigmata. Where a legendary High Queen has to deal with both marching armies to the apocalypse, and the irritating banal realities of being pregnant at the same time. Of course Jordan digs into the idea of prophesied love- it's a huge theme in folklore and mythologies the world over. Jordan wants to dig into what it really means for there to be a person out there that you are destined to be with: that is a match for you, decreed so by the universe itself....and that you get absolutely no agency and choice in choosing. If anything Tumblr, which adores the 'red string of fate'/'soulmark'/'soulmates share pain'/'world is black until you look into your soulmates eyes' (to name a few of the more prevalent ones- some of which Tumblr practically invented), should be super on board for the parade of fated lovers to be found in WoT. It's nothing short of baffling to me that their not more fondly viewed.
And I think that is tied to the follow up complaint: the criticism that Jordan 'uses prophecy love as a replacement for a romance arc'. But that is something that is just. Patently untrue.
Cause the thing is that is how soulmates are often used...in the majority of soulmate au fanfics you find here and on AO3- an excuse to get the really hard part (two characters realizing they are right for each other and love each other, then having the communication skills to articulate that so they can start a relationship) out of the way, so the author can focus on the fluff or angst or other part they and the audience want to get to. And that's fine! But that's not at all what Jordan does. Just like he does with the Prophecies of the Dragon, or Elaida's fortellings, or even just most of Min's viewings- Jordan takes the idea of the prophecy soulmate, this person decreed by some higher power to be Perfect For You and being right about it, and digs deeper, shining it in different lights and attacking it from different angles. Jordan gives the concept of the soulmate teeth, explores the spines and the sharp points of it: is it real love if it's fated and not your choice? Can you trust your own feelings, or are they fate's design working against you as surely as Aphrodite worked against Helen or Eros against Apollo? What is it like, to see someone one day, and know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that you would love this stranger? This question mark? This wildcard?
Rand's relationships with Min and Aviendha, as well as Mat and Tuon's courtship are great examples of this conundrum. Min and Aviendha have completely opposite reactions to the same information that demonstrates their unique strengths and weaknesses as characters and people, while Tuon and Mat's courtship is all about two people who know they will marry trying to figure out what that means, without ever confronting the reality of those prophecies directly.
Min, as befits a Seer who has learned time and time again that her viewings can not be changed, has resigned herself in an almost fatalistic fashion to all of them, and to loving Rand no less. Min knows that she, and two others, will love him, and she accepts its inevitability the same way she accepts Colavere's death, or Logain's glory, or the shattering of the White Tower. What is, is, and there is no sense or point in struggling against it. What concerns her a great deal more is what she doesn't know- she doesn't know if Rand will love her in return, she doesn't know the identity of the other two women who will love him, and she doesn't know if he will fall in love with one or both of the others but not her. Add to that Min's own insecurities about how she stands out and doesn't fit what her society deems 'proper', between her crossdressing, and her offputting manners, and it makes perfect sense that she's worried about making Rand love her. She doesn't mind sharing him- she hates the idea of being in love with a man who doesn't love her in return, of being stuck like 'Elmindreda' of the stories, sighing and pining endlessly for a man instead of being able to act, to take control of her own fate. 
So she takes control: she learns to flirt from Leane, works hard at making herself desirable, and also indispensable: with her visions, her advice, even just her emotional support to Rand when he otherwise has no one else. The irony is that whenever Rand thinks of Min prior to her return to his side in LoC, it's about how much he liked her earthy honesty and lack of wiles: how she was earnest and made him feel at ease, and didn't 'spin his head like a top'- and that's still what he loves about her after they get together: the fact that she isn't fooled by his front, that she sees him clearly and refuses to be driven away the way so many others are so easily. The point is that Min never had to change, and in the ways that matter she didn't- she only thought she did because of her own fatalism.
Contrast that with Aviendha, who, after learning about being destined to fall in love with Rand, does everything in her power to prevent that outcome- because she is a warrior, a soldier, who has never yet met a problem that could not be killed, endured, or retreated from. Aviendha values nothing so much as her honor and her word- she has promised to keep Rand safe for Elayne and what greater act of dishonor could there be in that situation then not just failing in that promise, but despoiling (and she does view it that way) said man herself? So she is awful to him in the hopes of poisoning the well of affection or at least keeping him far enough away that she is never tempted. Aviendha hurls contempt and anger at him, berates him, does everything short of trying to stab him in an effort to make him hate her, and it doesn't work. Despite all her efforts to keep her thorny wall up, they are literally made for each other and can not help but be drawn together time and again. Despite all her efforts to insist, to him and herself, that she hates him, she can not hide entirely that the opposite is true: that she likes him, sees his strength and courage and resilience, and is a little in awe of his generous kindness. 
This is why she vacillates wildly between wanting desperately to get away from him in The Fires of Heaven, to not wanting to leave his side: they are two planets caught in each other's gravity, with about as much chance of escaping each other. When she resorts to the last recourse of a soldier- retreat- and runs headlong into a blizzard that would surely kill her, Rand follows to try and save her life and she can deny the truth that she loves him no longer, nor can she resist taking him, even knowing that to redress that balance, she will one day have to offer her life to Elayne (as she attempts to do in LoC)- though fate still has other plans in store.
But in many ways the apex of this, the relationship that really shows Jordan's deconstruction of this trope, is Mat and Tuon. Before they ever lay eyes on each other, each is given a prophecy that they will marry the other: not that they'll love each other, not that they will be able to trust each other, not even that that will like each other: just that they will marry. And their strange courtship is a result of this knowledge, as each attempts to suss out the other, to try and understand them without ever overplaying their own hand. Each believes that the moment they admit their prophecy they will destroy any chance of real connection or understanding.
To Tuon, if Mat learns he is destined to wed her he gains something she can not abide: power over her, leverage that could be used to subvert her own plans and visions- because nothing matters more to Tuon than control, especially over herself. So she keeps her 'fortune' secret and tries to figure out: What will it mean to be married to Mat? Will he be a pretty trophy? A liability? A threat to her Empire? Will she have to kill him once she gets her heirs?
To Mat, if Tuon learns of his prophecy, she gains the power to take away his freedom, to snare and collar him and bind him to her, because that's how Mat deep down views marriage: as a binding cord, a loss of freedom, and nothing matters to Mat more than freedom. So he keeps his *Finn gained knowledge secret and tries to figure out: What will it mean to be collared by Tuon? Will she she treat him as a pretty and plaything the way Tylin did? Will she try to use him against Rand and the Westlands? Will she make him a slave and sent him to be beaten anytime he disobeys her? Will he have no choice but to fight her one day, this woman he is going to swear to spend his life with? Will he have to kill her the way he did Melindhra, and carry that guilt of mariticide on top of all else?
So the two stay in their strange limbo, because as long as they don't admit it out loud to the other, they can pretend they are still two people forced together by happenstance, and (each thinks) they can continue to try and understand and figure out the other, to find out where this inevitability of their marriage will really leave them, and if there can be even the faintest possibility of love in such circumstances. And that limbo- that protracted refusal to act as if they are under fate's direction- is what allows them to build a genuine bond of trust and respect for each other, and to start seeing the other person with the clarity that love requires. All this, so that when Tuon finally does play her hand, and reveal the truth....it's obvious they've long since fallen in love with each other (even though Tuon won't admit that to herself), and come to trust each other (even though Mat won't admit that to himself).
And the thing is- all of Jordan’s prophecy romances are written like this: from Egwene seeing that loving Gawyn might be both their downfalls in LoC and seeking him out anyways, to Perrin misinterpreting the 'falcon and hawk' viewing and thinking Faile is a danger to him when she's the love of his life, to Galad and Berelain not even being AWARE they’re fated to fall in love and just....do, at wild first sight (Another classic folklore/mythology trope). They also never find out:  always remaining unaware that the Pattern had long since decreed that they would be together and being incredibly funny/annoying about it. The prophesied love is an example of classic Jordan: taking a common, maybe even ubiquitous premise, and asking those complicating questions that allow him to write it as something much more nuanced and interesting and fascinating. And he gets no credit for it, send tumble.
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lamelinam · 6 months
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this is how you lose the time war 💙⏳❤
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