movingmyselfon

[movingmyselfon]

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[movingmyselfon]

21;56pm

It seems like my sister and I can't catch a break

21/03/2024, 19:44pm

Not me applying for things and not getting anything

#lol what sons should be going tbrougb wr are #i oray for us both #bjt im quite tired #mytalks

[movingmyselfon]

21/03/2024, 19:44pm

Not me applying for things and not getting anything

#like im literallt getting rejected from everhtbing i apply to #i just cant seem to be able to het out of hwre #and my bro and sis both got things recently and people af work have goo #but its just me thay cant #evne Uk is gonna get something coz of her cousin #and shell go before me too and ill be sitting hwre atill watiting #im so sad and tired right nowd #and not a single person knows itd #mytalks

[movingmyselfon]

13/03/2024, 05.04

Another Ramadan where I'm still at home

#atill noy married even ehen i say every yewr itll be my last one here #and every year its never trued #and now my dad f #the righteous man yelled at me for nothing #just the fact thag he cant fucking hear anuthing #apparently r #but i know thats a lie he heard he just wanged me to be a small little quiet angel who never gets annoyed #and juat 10 mins before telling a story of neighbors complaining back in the day h #he yelled so loudly its actuallt laughable #because ince again he proves hes ghe prob #then he comes downs to statg saying hoe hes scared of saying anufhing to anyone #hes porbably the msot deluded man along sideb his son that i know #he doesnt have to woro while fasfing and when he did he would work at 5pm #but we all have to be readu and alert and fast nd efficient and never lose any tempef #fuck mylife. #its amounted to nothingness and i keep praying for beyyer days #ive started being delusional iny my prayers #coz im so desperate at this pointf #beyong desperate #crying in bef at 5am when i have go be up for work af 9 #but hell never knoe that or the pain he causes his children 3sp daughters #i hope sowmtbing changes #for thr better #because i trally csnt handle this anymore #mytalks #do they ever get better ay this point in my life mow

[movingmyselfon]

01/03/2024, 13.47pm

I wouldn't wish my family on anyone.

#esp my brothersd #mainly ny brother's #meant to be your protectors lol your helpred #nah in this house you beg for help you notifiy qhat you need help beforehand #only for it to get ingored and then when the jssue arises even worse #its your fault only. #ypure completely in tbw wrong #and your work your day your life your circumstances dont ever natter #i hate my csr problems i never ever want gbem but ehen i do #but when i do have ghem im demonised #im belittled im argudef with then told that i make the argument #and it all stems from the littleone thay is worshiped by my parenrs #look after him love him care for him protect him feed him do anything and everything for him f #but if he wants to say something or do something hes always right and tbere is nothing to say aboir that matter at all everg #i hate my life. i hate my house. i hate every single tnings i hae #i have and get nothing and i cry and i pray and i beg i geg nothing #just tears and anger and sbouts and fights #and notnings chnahing ever #or anytime soon f #thats one tbing im the most certain of.g #mytalks #work2.0

[movingmyselfon]

28/02/2024, 19.54pm

Not people saying girls hold things.....not in this house lol

#hes still sulking abour thag mesage i accidenfallt sent #like a little school girl. #and saying petty little things just like a girl would f #fucking pathetic 3xcuse of brothers i have #literally said some of the most hurtful things to me fhat i still remember and get upset about #that ive let go rven if hes never apologized or acknowledged them #bjt i juat let go #and here he is giving snide remakrs and not speaking to me just like hoe girsl in dramams do #why the fuck why tbe fuck was i given brothers lile tbis #i have to l3t go of my hyrt #but im never ever alloeed to ever hurt someone else #and i geel so bad about it bjt his attitude and pride and ego wtops me grom wanting to apologiae #i have nothing good in my lige #mhms illness ksnt vetting beyyer #tberes a time line beginnings #i have no marriage prowpect at all #i have no one eho wanrs me in any wah exceot to make themselves feel good or look good #or to make fun of me underhandedly g #amd a family i have to carry so much im buri3d under it #work all day and pretend to be happy and come home and juwt sit in sadness #i pity myself. f #i wasnt made for anythint good it seems #just pain sadness and manipulation h #what was tbe point of my exist3nce #mytalks #work2.0

[movingmyselfon]

28/02/2024, 10.20am

Gonna be surrounded by fakeness in an hour lol

#the bitch is in and her deluded fakie is in too. #so theyll be going around acting like theyre besties and the greatest things ever to walk on the earthf #funng how i say rhings and tven im proven #like i literallt get given tbings i can use as examples to back up my pounts #she didnr do her role for the new starters proeprly #and for some fucking reason its me whos being given the emials to and asked for things #the fucking birch who can do no wrong did wrong and will just get awau with it #ive highlighted it to the fakeone multiple times to make her understand my point f #but i know shell end up taking it oit on somone else #cant let little miss bitcy look bad #mytalks #work2.0

[movingmyselfon]

27/02/2024, 13:57pm

As if we'd get great news

#i can see the docs sort of giving up on mym #she dient wanna give any meds today just send mum awah and fucking monoto3 #i had to ask ans shes goven us sometbing thag has side effects im noy so jappy about #i can see my mums sadnedd and worry #shes talk8ng aboit me getti g married and quick #lets be honest i wont f #ans if i miraculously did...how would she even get tbelufh the day #im fucking tir3d of my life #why iw there not an ounce of happiness in there now #why is it always sad after sar #im begging allah please please give us good news. please im begging.tn #please give my mum shifa and long life. please let this med work really well and not give bad side effects. f #please give her more years.p #please let me get married this year. please let me find a better job this summer #please let me find my soulmate this summers im begging you allah please. #please let things gets better for this family this year pleaseu #im begging you. #mytalks

[movingmyselfon]

From a distance

#quotes #lol how fitting considering my previous post

[movingmyselfon]

26/02/2024, 22:19pm

It's a shame how people turn out when you never expected it from them

#nessa really disappointed me. #so much in a wah i never ever thoigjt she ever would #likd just completely flipped the wah she was #snd whag she thoight and stoof for #and completely blinded me with ber support of that fucking depp motherfuckiny bitch #im acruqltl reallt upset about it all #i desperately crave a new better job ameen f #coz i want to sah all this to her #i wang her to be aware of her hypocrisy and two faced #and forgetting her morqls.r #all for a 2 faved bitch who wnatef nothing of her betore she got power #literallt tbags its nothing more #i wish nothing for them botb noe #so sad so upsetting f #i evem helped her vet the 7 role in the first place #lol spat in my face didnt she. #stupid me alwags on the shite reciebing end #mytalks #work2.0

[movingmyselfon]

25/02/2024, 00:11am

I'm literally the dumbest bitch ever

#fucking sent the wrong texf to the erong sibling #fml fucking belk #ill nevef livr fhis down now #coz hes so petty anx #i know hes uspet about it #and i have no escapr or nothing i canf lesve fhe house for ages #i have no prospect of movjn on #and i kniw hell make me feel bax for it than i already do #fml i never evef get anything mg sat #fml to hell . #mytalks #things are just getting shitt3r for me

[movingmyselfon]

what if i cant see

that far?

fifty.

forty.

not even thirty.

married with kids.

doesn’t seem real.

even now my plans

are not the 

ones I made in advance.

instead ones

made on the spot

because

i didn’t think

i’d make it this long.

o.m.f // growing up not wanting to live

#nothing changed #5 years its been since i reblogged tbis #im 30 now #nothinfs changed #me

[movingmyselfon]

This is for the people who didn’t party in their teens and twenties. For the people who didn’t have that “coming of age” movie experience with shenanigans and revelations. This is for the people who mostly keep to themselves. Who maybe prefer things to be quieter and gentler. This is for the people who don’t feel like they belong in a culture that values loud parties and flashing lights. I see you. And you are valid.

#quotes #me

[movingmyselfon]

Here's to the people who weren't abused by their parents, but whose parents sucked anyways. Here's to people whose parents fucked up raising you out of ignorance and not malice. Here's to the kids whose parents didn't know what to do with you so they did nothing at all. Here's to people whose parents are getting better and growing as people but still hurt you. Here's to every mean comment that wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't come from your mom; here's to awkward family dinners because you're all trying to forget;

here's to you, survivor of a thousand 'not as bad as it could have been' hurts. I see you. You aren't alone.

#lol #my family is so damaged #i hate it #quotes #me

[movingmyselfon]

17/02/2023, 20:18pm

I have literally the worst older brother in the world

#i hate every single thing about him. #hes notbing tome. #i fuckiny despiae him #i hate my mum and dads willingness to let him say whatver he wants #i hate him. and he will never chamge #and if he ever did its too late for me. #mytalks #hoe blessed i am with ths fucking bullshit

[movingmyselfon]

17/02/2024, 14.30pm

All my dad has ever shown us is problems

#all hes ever given us is probelms and anger. #there is not an ounce of peace in this house. #every fucking second of the day every fucking minute of the day every breathing moment #all hes ever done is show anger or problesm or crhing about moeny pribelms that hes created himself #and now is tbrowing onto his kids #the kids hes never shown or allowed any happimess #whats the point of buying things if you cant handle the things that come witj it. #now suddenlt we have to be soeting tbis shit out thaf he says shouldve been done in 2018 #so why yhe fuck wasnt it done #thank you so much dad for giving us nothing good to remember you by except poor #literally we have no happy memories from him for our childhood except him crying about moeny. #not lwtting us go on holiday ever #making promises then breaking them #taking tbings from us like money and even notebooks and never giving anutjing back #anger and abuse id all hes ever shown us #and runnimg away from banks #nothing good has ever come for this house and nothings will #no marriahe no peave no grandchildren notjing #i no lomger just hate my life. #i despise it. f #mytalks #things never ever vet beyter #they just gwt worse #and you become numbe. #fml to fucking hell i just dont care anytmore.

[movingmyselfon]

10/02/2024, 21:26pm

I asked my sister her whereabouts and I get called....toxic

#she had left around 2 and at 6.30 i asked herb #and she says she just finished watchjng a film....which when i asked which one sbe didnt reply #then i ranted abojt my brother to her which she also ignored #and then 1hr after no replu i ask her again coz dad wss almost home #sbe said now and i said ntohjng #she comes home with the fakeness of wondering why the door not closing is sudenly a problems #it werent just her covering herself for coming home late #and yhen comes to me asking why i was after her so much #i asked her twice....o #and then ehen i told her i was actually ranting more...she said #i am toxic for not just being happy for her to watch a film. im literally so confusefg #she has absolutely no idea what toxicity is coz shes the definition of a toxic sister bhy i am toxic for not being happy for her #when i asked twice j #fml #shes deluded and will never ever see sense or how much her alone has hurtme #fuckimg bitch #im so lucky right.f #mytalks #never fuckimg end