My Wedding Date is an Escort!
Summary: When invited to your best friend's wedding, you panic. One of the groomsmen, Toji Fushiguro, is your ex-fiancè. Not wanting to deal with probing questions and the embarrassment of being single, your friend Haibara recommends using an Escort! Taking a leap of faith, you book one my, the hottest one. Gojo Satoru is hot, sweet, and funny! The package deal! Men and Women pay thousands to go on a date with him (even more, which he doesn't do often). So when your request comes in, the desperation and pleading tone of your voice. Gojo’s heartthrobs, even more so when you tell him you don't want to have sex.
Pairing: Escort!Gojo x FAB Reader
Word Count: 5,115
Warning: cursing, apologies, fingering, handjobs, smut 🥹, fluff
A/N: Well everyone, we have one more part of this series. 🥲 But I plan on taking requests for our sweet, complicated couple! !! If you want to be included in the tag list, YOU MUST HAVE AGE LISTED! Thank you!!
Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five
“You want what?” Satoru stared blankly at you, blinking ever so slowly like a cat. Your words seemed to have short-circuited his brain.
“I said I want a refund.” your tone is stoic, “I am not happy with the services I was provided.” Satoru’s shocked expression twists into a wide grin as you stick your bottom lip out in a pout. “High-end escort, my ass.”
Satoru laughs, throwing his head back as a faint flush grazes over his cheeks. “Yeah? Not happy at all, huh?” His eyes dance over your features.
“Nope! This jerk got up and left me after I paid him.” You shrug your shoulders dramatically. “Not only am I out an ungodly amount of money, but I’m also dateless for this wedding.”
“He sounds like a class-A-asshole.” Satoru’s hand gently reaches out, cupping your cheek.
“Yeah, he was.” His heart flutters at ‘was’ instead of ‘is,’ an ember of hope flickers to life in his chest. “Then again, he said sorry, and punched the hell out of my asshole ex, so I guess he isn’t that bad.”
Satoru’s fingers are so warm and gentle against your face. His thumb brushed over tear-stained cheeks as he pulled you in, closing the distance between you. His forehead presses gently against your own as he shuts his eyes.
“I’ll make sure you get every last cent back.” White lashes life, pools of breathtaking blue peek through them, meeting you. “It’s the least I could do.”
“Cool,” you sighed, leaning into his touch, “I would like to use that money to take a few pastry classes.”
God, hearing you say that makes Satoru’s heart leap with joy. “Money well spent, not that you need it. Your pastries are the absolute best.” your hand reaches up, gently holding Gojo’s firmly against your cheek, not allowing him to move. He swallows thickly at the regret forming in his throat. “I’m so fuckin’ sorry.”
“How long did it take you to figure out it wasn't me after you left?”
“Maybe an hour,” he scoffed, his breath hot against your lips, “I honestly have to give Suguru the credit. He knocked the sense into my head.”
“Thank God for Suguru.”
“Yeah, he called me a fucking idiot.”
“Well—.”
“I know, I was the biggest fuckin’ idiot.”
Silence washed through the room. It wasn't uncomfortable in the silence, reminding you of the first night you two spent together. Things had been so smooth and natural with him, and they still were. Satoru hadn't believed you at first. He said some fucked up shit, but he had apologized for them. He had told you himself that he wanted to make your relationship work.
Staying angry and pushing him away would be too easy. You could quickly write this off as another failed relationship. Or you could do one of the hardest things a person could do.
You could fight.
Fight for what could be a relationship that only comes once in a lifetime. Fight for a future. You could fight to see this through, to see where it took you both.
You sat back, sighing dramatically. “I guess I owe Suguru a drink when you introduce us.” Cerulean eyes were the size of peas as your words washed over Satoru.
“What?”
“Or maybe I’ll take him to lunch for his help.” Heart thundering, you did your best to keep cool, examining your nails boredly. “Or better yet, I could make us three dinner. I may be a professional baker who works with confectioners sugar, but my curry is to die for.”
“S-Sweetheart—”
You grabbed Satoru’s face, pulling him as close to you as possible. “Toru,” The man stiffened at the use of his nickname, “you said what we have is worth fighting for. That you want to be with me.” You inched closer to his face, your fingers brushing over his cheekbones.
“I did say that, and I meant every word.” He leaned into your touch, his hands caressing your bruising knuckles.
“Are you positive?”
“I wouldn't have said it if I wasn't.”
“How can you be so sure? How will we make this work when you're an escort?” Dread worked its way through your stomach, settling over your chest. “I—I don't think I could just wait at home for you to come back from work. But I also don't want to keep you from doing something you love. You do it to help people; it makes you happy. I don't want to take that away from you.”
From the mere silence, you weren't sure what was going through Satoru’s mind. He just stayed stoic, glancing over you with an unreadable expression. God, maybe this was something he didn't want to give up.
What felt like an eternity of silence ended as Satoru moved. Your hands fell onto your lap as he ran his hands over your upper arms in smooth, gentle strokes. You had been so uncertain of what he would say or do, how he would react to your hesitancy. The way his crystalline blue eyes burned with a fiery passion told you everything you needed to know without the use of words.
“Sweetheart, I would rather fight with you than take on another client.”
His words felt like they’d stolen your soul. Your bottom lip quivered just as a trembling sob had your body shaking. Satoru pulled you into his lap, toned arms wrapping around you as you straddled him. His large palm stroked the back of your head as your chest pressed firmly against his.
You tried not to cry, but the relief was too much. Soft sobs vibrated in your chest as your head buried itself deep into the crook of Satoru’s neck, your hot, joyful tears staining his shirt. Not once did Satoru attempt to move you. He did the opposite, pulling you tighter against him, his fingers curled into your hair, stroking your scalp as you sobbed.
Those few words meant the entire world to you. The doubts and fears eating away at you like moths on cloth ceased to exist. They were replaced with a swarm of multi-colored butterflies that flutter in your stomach and heart.
You could make this work.
Pulling away from Satoru’s neck, you reached up to wipe at your eyes, but Satoru gently batted your hands away. His thumbs brushed against your flushed skin, wiping away the tears of joy. His touch, much like his words, embodied his affection for you. That sweet gesture made you want to cry more, but you were confident that all the crying you'd done in the last eighteen hours had dried up your tear ducts.
“I want to make this work with you.” Satoru gently cupped the back of your head. “Thank you for giving me another chance.”
”Thank you for apologizing.” You gently ran your fingers over the fabric of his shirt. “And for punching Toji, it was so hot seeing you get all mad.”
Satoru held you tight, flopping down onto the futon with a chuckle. “You thought I was hot? Imagine me coming back to get my sunglasses with my tail between my legs to see kitchen utensils being flung through the kitchen.” He took his bottom lip between his teeth. “Seeing you going feral, slapping and kicking at a man twice your size, got me all hot and bothered.” He nuzzled your neck with a very phony bad prono moan. “I’d let you hit me all you want; just tell me I’m a good boy when you do.” His lips peppered kisses up your neck before pressing against the corner of your mouth, winning a series of giggles from you.
“Toru, you’re crazy.” Your words held no heat as you wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Mhmm, I’m crazy about you.”
You ran your fingers through his hair before you pulled him in, kissing him softly. The tension in his muscles relaxed as he kissed back. His smooth lips gently moved against yours. Maybe your lips tingle because of the taste of his mint toothpaste, or it could be the spark between you. Little fireworks exploded over your lips, deep in your chest, and even further between your legs.
The same embers that had burned hot and bright inside of you last night began to glow red hot with need. Your hands roamed down from his hair to grip his shirt, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss as you turned your head. Satoru’s eyes opened, focusing on your face. The way your eyebrows knitted together, how flushed your face and chest were, and the subtle way you rocked your hips up against him.
He pulled back, panting heavily against your slightly ajared mouth. “Sweetie.” He breathed out.
“Sorry,” you released him, “sorry.” Now might not be the right time to lose yourself into passion. But before you could spiral into your thoughts, Satoru followed your retreating hands, gently holding them.
”I don’t want you to stop.” He placed one of your hands back on his shirt, and you instantly grabbed a hold of the fabric. “Just be aware of the effect that you have on me.” He took your free hand, pressing it against his semi-hard cock that was twitching to life in his pants.
A sudden burst of confidence took over you. Licking your lips, you gently began stroking him while you gripped his shirt as tight as you could. Satoru shuddered, pressing both his hands on either side of your head caging you underneath him. A string of soft, murmured cries of your name slipped through his lips as he bucked into your hand.
”You’re twitching so hard.”
”Can’t help it, a beautiful woman is rubbing my cock.”
Releasing his shirt, you ran your hand over his arm, gently grabbing his wrist. He perked up, putting all his weight on his left hand as you gently led his other past your breasts, down your stomach, before you pressed him firmly over your clothed pussy. “I'm twitching, too.” Satoru’s cock throbbed hard underneath your palm. “You okay?” an aching growl rose in his throat as his fingers rubbed circles around your clit.
“Y-Yeah, I think I just almost came in my pants.”
“Over touching my pussy?”
“No, it's because of you.” Your hips jerked as he increased the pressure of his fingers. “You're so goddamn irresistible. I want to please you.” fingers rubbed faster, his lips trailing down your neck in open-mouthed kisses.”I want you to call out my name, to make you cum so hard you think you're about to ascend.”
“Oooh, oooh fuck.” Satoru sucked in a breath as you slid your hand into his boxers. “Toru~ Feels good.”
“Yeah, it d-does.” He choked out, sliding his hand under your panties. “Fuuck, you weren't kidding.” Thick long fingers ran over your clit, spreading your slick arousal over the tiny bundle of nerves. “You’re so wet.”
You shifted, facing him, “I wanna try something.” Satoru nodded, kissing you deeply as you both tugged your pants and underwear off, followed by shirts. Once you were bare, you slotted your hips over his legs, resting your legs on either side of him. “This way, I can kiss and touch you.” Your words cut off as Satoru slammed his lips against yours in a starved, searing kiss.
You kiss his back, moaning and gasping against his lips. He used the opportunity of you gasping to shove his tongue into your mouth. His tongue searched for yours, wrapping and massaging it with his own as his fingers groped your breasts. He still tasted like mint, and the smell of musk overwhelmed you as his fingers gently kneaded you. His hands are so warm and gentle against the softness of your breasts; it's a bold contrast to the way his mouth roughly moves against yours.
He’s devouring you, making you melt against his body. You wanted to make him feel the same way you did, warm and fuzzy. You desired for Satoru to be desperate, like a thirsty man dehydrated in the desert, and you were his oasis. Reaching between your bodies, you rubbed your fingers up and down your pussy, collecting your slick over them. Hering the pitch change in your voice, Satoru followed your hand. The instant he saw your pretty fingers rubbing yourself, he growled into your mouth before breaking the kiss.
”A-Are you that desperate for relief?” Satoru sighed heavily against your lips, tongue flicking out, licking at the drool dripping from the corner of your mouth. “All you have to do is ask, and I’ll rub that perfect pussy~”
“I-I—oooh god,” you rubbed your clit in a short circle before dipping your hand back down, collecting more of your slick. “n-not doing it for my sake.”
”No?” Satoru nipped gently at your bottom lip, his hands massaging the fat of your ass, pulling you tighter against him. “Then please tell me whose sake you’re doing it for.”
”Yours.”
Before Satoru could ask what you meant, he jumped as you wrapped your slick fingers around his thick throbbing cock. His head falls back as you begin rubbing your hand up and down his shaft, jerking him off, using your slick as lube. Feeling the heat from your juices and hand had Satoru losing himself, just like you wanted. He melted, his hands shakily grabbed you in order to ground himself as you jerked your wrist up and down faster.
”Feels good,” He groaned out, his hand dipping between your legs, fingers finding your clit. “but it’s not fair if I’m the only one feeling good now.” The tiniest moan passes through your pursed lips; your eyes meet him as you try to focus on keeping your hand moving up and down over his cock. But damn, his hands were too talented, it was hard to keep up with him. “God, you’re so wet just for me. If it feels this amazing on my fingers,” His hand dips further, two of his fingers pressing their way past your tight entrance and into your dripping cunt. “I can’t imagine how good it feels to be buried inside you.”
His fingers curl, rubbing your spongy sweet spot. They massage it, not stopping as you cry out softly against his mouth, your eyes narrowing as you stare into his eyes. They were usually full of light, but with his fingers buried inside of you and your hand wrapped around his cock, they were full of dark, desperate desire. If you were to move a certain way or make a single sound, he would be inside of you in the blink of an eye.
Which wasn’t a bad thing.
His lips were on yours, his moans flooding inside your mouth as you teased the tip of his dick with your thumb. Rubbing the pre-cum beading at the slit around the red swollen tip. Satoru’s eyebrows furrowed at the intense pleasure, his thumb mimicking the same pattern and strokes of your hand against your twitching clit. It didn’t take long for you to start rocking your hips against his hand, chasing your orgasm. Noticing the way you greedily fucked yourself on his fingers, Satoru pulled back, watching your hips rolling against him, desperately chasing the high you felt coming.
”What a good girl you are, taking what you want, what you need. I fucking love that.” A deep sigh escaped him, his breath fanning against your lips. “I love it, watching you lose all fucking control, it gets me off.” His cock twitched in your hand, emphasizing his point. “If you make yourself cum hard, I promise you I’ll make you cum ten times harder on my dick.” Satoru feels your walls flutter around his fingers. “You like the idea of that? Your pretty cunt seems to, she’s squeezing around me.”
”Y-Yeah, I want you, Satoru, want to feel you inside of me so back.”
”Cum for me first, then I’ll be sure to give you everything you want.”
You press your lips messily over his. “You promise? Promise you’ll give me everything I want?” His forehead presses against yours, his bangs sticking against your sweet sheen skin. “Promise?” You whine out desperately.
”Sweetheart, I promise I’ll give you everything you want and then some.”
Those positive affirmations were all you needed to have you gushing over his fingers. You silently scream against his lips, eyes clenched tight as you rocked and roll your hips against him. Satoru takes note of how your lips quiver and the way your back arches, pressing your breasts against his bare chest. Noting the way you sounded, how pretty you looked when you shattered and trembled in his lap as your hand squeezed his dick almost too hard as you let the waves of your orgasm hit you one after another.
Watching you cum in his lap would be a memory he’d look back on on lonely nights. God, he wanted to cum with you, to paint your tummy white with his hot seed. But the urge to pin you underneath him, you fuck you slowly, was stronger. Satoru wanted to have you cum that hard around his cock. To watch as you lose yourself in pure bliss because you deserve to. God, you deserved more than that, but this would be a good start.
He fully intended to make you feel this good as long as you would allow him.
When you found the strength to open your eyes slowly, you caught a glimpse of blue. Satoru had you pushed back on the futon, his fingers sliding out of you. His lips gently roamed over your breasts, kissing the mounds before his hands forced your legs apart. “Please tell me you still have that party favor bag.” He breathed out over your skin.
”You seriously think I would throw my terrible cheap penis candy away?” Satoru chuckled, lifting his head to watch you snatch a pink bag lying off to the side of you. “You'd be right; I fully intend on throwing it away once we use the condoms.”
“I have to admit, knowing you won’t be eating penis candy makes me feel pretty good.” He opened the bag, pulling out the six condoms shoved inside of it.
“I’m not opposed to eating penis candy if it tastes good.” A white brow arches at you. “I mean, I sucked yours last night, didn’t I?” You smirk as he fumbles, nearly dropping the foil packages in his hand. “I clearly remember just how sweet you tasted. Although I may need a reminder soon to confirm.”
”Babe, please, you’re going to make me blow my load before I even get inside of you.”
You watch as he tosses the other condoms to the side before ripping open the gold foil of a magnum condom with his teeth. ”Oooh, right, yeah.” Swallowing hard, you gape when Satoru rolls the condom over his cock with ease.
He slowly pushed his hips against yours, grinding his cock over your entrance to your clit. “Do you remember what I said to you our first night here at the inn?” Your soft moans are music to his ears as he grinds against you faster. “After you told me why you didn’t need to have sex?” Right now wasn't the time you wanted to be quizzed over things he said four days ago.
“Haah, fuck—uhm, you said you hoped that I would be able to recover soon?” His cock head pressed firmly against your entrance. “Nggh, I—I can’t remember. It’s hard to think when you’re teasing me like this.”
” No, you’re right. I did say I hoped you would recover.” His tip pressed harder against you, making your legs shake. “But I also said I wanted you to be able to have the most mind-blowing sex of your life.” The world seemed to slow as the gentleness of his words had you blinking. “I never thought I would be the one you’d be with.”
Something about the softness of his voice and the way he lovingly brushed his thumb over your bottom lip had your heart racing. This moment felt surreal as you replayed that first night again in your head. How you had cried in front of the escort you had hired to be your wedding date. He could have easily pushed you away, cringed over your complicated past, or not given a shit.
Instead, he hugged you and stroked your hair as you cried. He listened to you and allowed you to vent. This man went as far as defending you, siding with you. Satoru had held you close, bringing a certain comfort to your life you'd never felt before. It was a perfect full circle.
“I wouldn't want to be with anyone but you, Toru.” Gently cupping his face in your hands, you pulled him down, kissing him as passionately as you could. The warmth of your touch and the brush of your lips against his own made Satoru swell with excitement before shifting into a calmness that worked through him. “I need you.” You gasped out against his swollen lips.
“Then you’ll have me.”
Not wanting to waste another moment, Satoru gently pushed the head of his cock past the tight ring of muscles of your entrance. You gasped against his lips, eyes wide as he stretched you. His ab’s clenched as he held himself back, giving you a moment to adjust to his size, as his lips gently moved over your cheeks. Only when he felt your walls unclench and your legs wrap around did he begin pushing back inside of you.
Satoru couldn't get over how tight you felt wrapped around him, how warm you were. He'd slept with his fair share of people, but this, the feeling of slowly slipping inside of you for the first time, was a moment he'd never forget. From the way you smelt and how your hot breath tickled his ear. The sensation of your finger scratching gently over his undercut would forever linger because he didn't want this to be the first or last time he buried himself inside of you.
No, he wanted you to be the only person he was this intimate with again. He could easily see himself feeling this profound, this drunk off of joy and excitement each time you slept together. Satoru wanted to only hear his name on your tongue from now on.
While you couldn't read his mind or feel the emotions that course through every being of his soul, you felt the same way. Being with Satoru like this just felt right. No doubt, no uncertainty sat at the pit of your stomach. Just excitement and joy. Like you were walking a tightrope without the fear of falling.
This was perfection.
“Y-You're so tight.” Satoru choked out with a laugh as he pushed further inside of you with a whine. “Oooh, so fucking tight, baby.”
“Y-Yeah~ you're so big, really big.” Your breath chokes out as he slides deeper inside. “Haaa-haaah.” You dig your heels into his ass, pushing him further inside of your tight heat.
“N-Nnngh fuck, someone's getting impatient.”
“I can't help it, I-I want it, I want you so fucking bad.”
Satoru grunts softly, his tongue flicking over your bottom lip before hems slowly pulling out of you. “I want it too, baby.” He slowly slides back in, angling his hips to rub perfectly over that sweet spot inside of you. “And I’m going to give you exactly what you want.” His tongue gently slid past your slightly parted lips as he set a smooth and gentle pace.
You kiss back softly, flicking your tongue over his as his cock fucks you gently into the bedding. Your mind is reeling, taking over every one of your five senses, from his taste and smell. How his groans and grunts sound in your ears. You could feel his muscles twitching as his cock slowly bullied its way over your g-spot before pressing gently over your cervix. But it was the way he looked at you that genuinely had your heart stammering. Satoru was looking at you with a certain softness as his face contorted with pleasure.
You whimpered as he smiled, planting kisses down your neck, gently suckling at it. Satoru put all the emotions in his chest into those gentle, tender kisses. Savoring the way you jerked and squirmed as he gently fucked into your cunt. He suffocates on the delectable addictive air that was you. You take his breath away with every tear-filled glance into his eyes; every gasp and cry is music to his ears. So, of course, he’s lost his grip of control. Grabbing both your hands, he pinned them on either side of your head, his fingers interlacing with them as he moved at a faster pace.
“Ah—hah Toru,” you squeeze his hands, “Satorru~!” Crying out against Satoru’s mouth, you squeeze your thighs around him. Seeing you this fucked out of your mind as he fucked his thick cock deeper inside of you, only had Satoru moving faster.
“Ooh baby~ fuck~ fuuuuck~ you're getting close. I can feel it.” He grunts through gritted teeth. “You’re squeezing my cock just like you were squeezing my fingers.”
“Mmm yeah, M’ close Toru~!” You almost lose it as he grinds into you, his hips rubbing over your sensitive clit as his cock massages your sweet spots deep inside of you.
His grip on your hand tightens as he hisses, cock throbbing. “Oooh fuck, yeah baby, make a mess, make a fucking mess all over me.” One messy kiss followed by another. “Fuck~! Fuuuuck, I'm close too, gonna cum inside your tight hole~!” Nails dig into the back of his hands as your pussy clenched and twitches around him. “Yeah~ your pussy is so good~ telling me she likes what I’m saying. You want me to cum, yeah~?” Throw your head back, and you cry softly at the coil forming in your stomach.
“Y-Yeah wanna, wanna cum together~! Wanna—-ooooh god fuck me!” Satoru watched your eyes shut, tight eyebrows knitting together. He grinds his hips harder against your clit, buffs of deep growls leaving his mouth as his balls clench.
“Cum on my cock sweetheart~ yeah~ oooh fuck me yes!”
“Cu—” A scream of unfiltered ecstasy cuts off your words. Satoru watches you as you squirt over his crotch and the sheets beneath you both. “Ah!! Haaah!!”
Your trashing and shaking drives Satoru up the fucking wall. He frees your hands, gripping your hips, lifting them slightly so he can continuously fuck into your g-spot. Your legs shake aggressively as you fist the sheets. Your body was vibrating, eyes watering as you cum for a third time, watching as clear liquid soaks Satoru’s hips before you see white.
“Haa, fuck~ fuck~ fuck—” his head tips forward, watching his cock disappear inside of your convulsing pussy. “Cu-Cummin!” He bit out. “Cumming! Cumming!!” He doesn't scream like you, but he roars like a fucking beast. “Graahk! Fuuuck! Fuck!! Take it! Take all of my cum!”
You’re so sensitive it almost hurts to have Satoru thrusting himself inside you. He doesn't stop until his hips stop moving on their own, and the condom between you is filled to the brim. Only at that point does he gently pull out of you, grimacing as you wince in pained pleasure.
“Are you okay?” he gently asks as he takes the condom off, tying it to throw it in the trash can near the bed.
“I-I’m so good.” You drunkenly slur, but you haven't had a sip of alcohol. “Oh my god, I don't think I've ever cum that hard in my entire life.”
You could see Satoru swell with pride as he headed to the bathroom. “I guess my wish for you did come true.” You can hear the water running before he comes back. “How was the mind-blowing sex?”
“Confident in yourself?”
“I don't mean to come off as an arrogant ass.” He shrugs a shoulder as he drops to his knees gently, wiping your thighs and pussy clean with the warm rag in his hand. “But I'm ninety-five percent sure I saw your soul leave your body.”
“Okay! Okay!” You sputtered out a laugh as he wiped himself clean before lying beside you, pulling you into his side with a satisfied hum. “Okay, the mind-blowing sex was—” your eyes trailed up to his face, “well mind-blowing!”
“Ah~” he blows against his trimmed nails, “way to go, Satoru~” and rubs nails over his pectoral muscle.
“You dork!” you playfully smack his arm, “that was so uncool. Like the uncoolest thing to do.”
Satoru was beaming with joy as he cupped your cheek, pulling you in for a deep kiss. You sighed, missing him back roughly before pulling away with a happy hum. “Still uncool?”
“Super uncool.”
“Worth a shot.”
You lay there, tracing shapes over Satoru’s chest. “Hey, Toru?” you asked, turning your head to study his perfect face. You were surprised to see him watching you, his blue eyes tracing over the curves of your body, to the way your finger drew invisible hearts over him.
“Yeah, sweetie?”
“What are you doing this Saturday?” You swore the man underneath you twisted faster than the speed of light. There was a certain glimmer of excitement in his eyes that had your heart fluttering like the butterflies in your stomach.
“Well, I did have this client, but I was dumb enough to cancel on them, so my Saturday is free!”
“Good,” you kissed the tip of his nose, “would you like to be my wedding date?”
“I would love to be your wedding date.”
Tag List (AGE MUST BE IN BIO)
@arminloverlol l @jamzywiththejam28 @gojoful @maskedpacific @ahseyy @kash77 @sadmonke @ari-maccha @sugurubabe e @hyori2 @bluechocolatemint @itsinherited @dellappatca @therealestpussyeater @dead-at-tokyo @nvrgojover @drakenswifeyy @nealeart t @yunho-leeknow @fire-child-kira @faeryminnyx @tqd4455 5 @harmonyflora @volkins181-blog @noukstmblr @lovley212 @stinkinstuffie @desihopelessromantic @witchbybirth @sonicsolos @lilbiguy @supsiii @rentheannihilator r @bloopsstuff @pepepepepopopopo @pandoness @sw33cadav3r @rixo-19 @meguvmii @sxnkuna @mmeerraa @lemonintrovert01 @bunny-lily @kibananya @kamastar39 @rjreins @lzaj19 @tiredflame132 @manyno @oliiper @rengokushair @simp-plague @matchalatte06 @haesify @majanggeum @solarrexplosion N@tbzzluvr @username23345 @demonboyssss @sakui1
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Kickin Chicken once said
@hiwelcometothemonstersancturary gave me the go to do this, which is mistake one for them, so here is my go at giving them what they encouraged while I pray it works well. And if not...well I at least tried.
* (Refering to Bobby) She is called Captain Heartbeat cause she will squeeze love out of your heart...and blood, but mostly love.
* (After speaking pr-bt for a 2 minutes) You ever forget your first language?
* Mods, take their swimming privileges away and put them in the pool.
* I would go evil, but I am going to follow dad's steps of being good...plus I saw they went shoe shopping so...
* What do you mean I can't seduce myself!?
* (Loud thud off Camera) PERCEPÇÃO DE PROFUNDIDADE!
* Our ship has a pool, an omelet bar, tons of rooms for you to sleep in, one would say that is a cruise, to which I say, fair, but have you seen the plank, cause I am about to get you real familiar with it.
* I heard some demons were touched starved. I got more than enough buckshot to help with that.
* Bubba, reading chat: "Kickin isn't the sharpest knife in the group," Well that is rude...
Kickin: I did eat packing peanuts when I was younger to be fair.
Everyone in room:
Kickin:...Wait is this new information for you?
Everyone: YES!?
* Wonder how many people come on to see me stream thinking "Oh hey, the voice actor for Kickin does streaming," or "Hey is this the official channel for the Smiling Critters show?" And they just come in on me saying something like, "I HAVE BUILT A TO SCALE JOLLY ROGER WITH POPSICLE STICKS!"
* Hey Theo, it's you! (Gets empty bottle thrown at head) Ow.
* White is the color of evil, cause nothing exists in it! Delight taught me that!
* I would cry, but I am too dehydrated to do such a thing. (Goes to drink some water, pauses, puts water bottle back down)
* It is always funny to see people react to my complete indifference to horrible stuff.
* I needed to find a way to get a gambling addiction, so I thought space could have the answer.
* (Seeing Bubba being affected by the blue screen) Bubba, I know you always wanted to become the one thing I love, but this is ridiculous!
* I am just saying revenge is amazing, ok? Yeah, you gain a tremendous amount of regret sometimes, but it is amazing.
* Cool motive bro, still murder!
* (In response to Angel giving them food) It hasn't been that long since I started streaming, it has only been...5 hours...
* This is my favorite bird. (Holds up middle finger before pointing to self) It is the chicken.
* (Wearing VR) The future is today!...I might need it adjusted though.
* Does dying take away time away from my vacation days?
* IT IS ALL A CONSPIRACY TO END ME! IF NO ONE EVER HEARS FROM ME AGAIN, IT IS CAUSE THEY KILLED ME, CHOPPED ME UP, AND FED ME TO THE WOLVES DANG IT!
* Fursuits are getting so good you can now subject yourself to your own form of trauma to fuse into it. Brought to you by Playtime.
* I have seen the internet and honestly, have seen worse. Which is saying alot.
* (Looks at Candy Cat in his lap before looking at camera)...Help. me.
* Theo: You finally did it! Did it help when you imagined it was me you were fighting?
Kickin: Not at all...worked when it was Dogday though.
Dogday: WHAT DID I DO?
Kickin: Hell if I know. As long as it works though.
* (Playing I Expect You to Die, dies trying to do an action pose)...(Starts singing the James Bond theme notes)
* (Reacting to "Unnecessary Feelings") Bubba, I was promised a crime drama, not a reminder that no one in this house knows how to feeling well, including us!
* I would boop you, but I don't want a pirate hook this early in my character development.
* William then preceded to commit several hours of joy, on at least an entire classroom of kids to learn why death does.
* You can have one hit Hoppy...Ah não, ela tem uma cadeira!
* Don't worry, I won't hurt you, I am just going to turn into a nuke to fall on you.
* (Stares at camera while winding music box)
* Chica, you wouldn't hurt your brother, would you? Or would you want me to be you and Foxy's kid, whichever makes you more merciful on me.
* I am here to break the stereotype that parrots can only be pirates and no other reasons at all.
* (Refering to how much money he has in game) $60!? I can finally afford 1 AAA video game! (Pulls up Balan Wonderworld steam page) I am going to buy this one guys!
* Kickin, coming into Crafty's stream: You mind if I borrow a picture.
Crafty: Uh sure...Why?
Kickin, taking one of the monsters: A reminder.
Crafty: A reminder of what?
Kickin: Of who in this family is an actual threat. (Leaves without elaboration)
* Don't make fun of me, I will cry will I beat you up.
* We don't even own a game cube, I just want to find a copy of Skies of Arcadia to display.
* When you get into a certain mindset for so long, it is so jarring to have to go into a different line of think, like you just suddenly ask, "Wait I don't have to ration this sandwich for the entire year?"
* WHY DID I LET THEO TALK ME INTO PLAYING THIS!?
* I am still surprised I recovered so well from all of that.
* What would the others do without me? Minus not having a heart attack everyday.
* I SURVIVED THAT FACTORY FOR OVER 10 YEARS, I WILL NOT LET A SLIDING PUZZLE DEFEAT ME!
* Have good night everyone! I don't remember how I end these...I will make you walk the plank! No, that is not it...
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[Yuu joined the game.]
Minecraft Single Player! Yuu AU
Game logic and all carried with them. That is what is about to go down.
Has their entire inventory with them, and has no clue at to what bendable legs are
“Why do I have these weird moving thingies at the end of my arms?” they’re fingers.
There’s not a lot of time to ponder the sudden addition of fingers and toes and stuff when Grim very warmly greets Yuu with some good ol blue fire and a demand for clothing.
Yuu is just so confused. What kind of mob is this??? Can mobs speak??? Did they suddenly go on a modded server in the middle of their sleep?????
Yuu looks down.
THEY HAVE A NEW SKIN??? Where is their other skin??? They didn’t change skins in their sleep, that’s weird as hell!!
Regardless of their very, very befuddled state, Yuu decides what’s best for them and immediately takes Grim as a hostile mob.
“I don’t know what kind of mob you are, but if you can speak you must have some loot!”
Rather than Yuu getting chased by Grim, it’s Grim being chased by Yuu. Yuu has no time to waste on waiting around for a mob to attack them, they need drops and EXP levels. ("When did hostile mobs learn to run?")
Grim gets caught by the clown headmage's whip, and Yuu heeds absolutely no attention to Crowley's scolding words as they marvel at the utterly insane graphics and physics of the whip. It can curve! Curve!! In the air!!!
Dragging Yuu and Grim by the hood and scruff, they enter the ever fabled hall where bad things go down
This entrance ceremony is about to get 1000x more wacky than it should be
“Go on child, tell the mirror your name so you can get sorted properly."
Upon the mirror going, "State thy name." Yuu briefly wonders for a moment if the mirror is a really modded player or a mob.
It wasn't as brief as they thought, because the mirror states once more:
"State thy name."
".. Yuurmom."
Crowley and Riddle are about to throw a fit at the utter lack of decorum until the mirror continues on with its analysis of Yuu rather than berating them for being immature and—good Sevens Yuurmom is actually their name
“The shape of thy soul is… shaped as squarely as the earth. Thy soul is solidified and firm in its position, bending to none other than itself. Therefore, they are suited for no dormitory.”
When Grim comes up and starts spewing fire everywhere and gets Kalim's butt on fire, Yuu prioritizes helping a fellow player by utilizing the beautifully named mlg waterbucket
Things only get crazier because the water source from the bucket is only a foot high which isn’t tall enough to put out Kalim, the water is spreading causing several other Scarabia students in a 8ft square radius to get their feet wet, someone is questioning what kind of magic this is to have a seemingly endless flow of water, and Grim is still wreaking havoc
As soon as they dump that water, Yuu has their sights set on Grim. They want his loot so bad, and their ever-trusty enchanted axe will surely do the job within two hits if one is critical.
Was it mentioned that handheld, sharp weapons are not allowed on campus grounds unless given special permission?
Crowley does not know who he should worry about more, the raging fire-spewing cat or the axe-swinging first year student(?) who’s somehow running and jumping around without bending their knees
The orderly Riddle Rosehearts and opportunistic Azul hardly hesitate to begin trying to settle the issue, as they always do
Current issue: Riddle Rosehearts cannot restrain a weapon if it is not created from magic, so even as he goes, “Off With Your Head!” to Yuu and Grim, Yuu’s axe isn’t gone and they’re still swinging
Grim would have met a grim fate had it not been for Crowley’s infuriated intervention with his Love Whip yanking him out of the axe’s path
“WHAT do you think you are doing to this familiar?!”
("I ain't no familiar!")
The Entrance Ceremony has gone terribly. A student(?) woke up late, disrupted the ceremony only for them to NOT be sorted into any dorm with an extremely abnormal analysis of their soul, the Headmage brought in a flame-throwing cat that set everything on fire, Kalim's ass is burnt, there is solid square water spread around Scarabia's standing place soaking the students around it, and said late-waking student(?) is recklessly swinging an axe at the fire-throwing cat
Also the student(?) is jumping. Without bending their legs. They are jumping and running without bending their legs, they also are swinging an axe without bending their arms. Their entire body is a rigid as a pole and at some point it is questioned if this student is even human
At this point, Yuu has presented themselves as enough of a threat that Housewardens Vil and Leona are forced to intervene. Handheld weapons, regardless of user, are not to be equipped or carried on campus for student safety (though one of the two might not be ready to admit that they care for their students’ safety)
Leona knocks Yuu(rmom) out. One firm uppercut, an oddly masculine, "OOF!", the whole body of the student(?) flashing red, and they are down for the next few hours. In the meantime, NRC staff and Housewardens have to figure out what to do with an unyielding soul, their axe, and the seemingly infinite water that they've put down.
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In the name of love (and gossip)
dc x dp
The day had been going normally. Tim had been having breakfast with Cass when Bruce walked in bleary-eyed with a grunt in greeting as he went for the coffee machine. He and Damian has stayed out later than usual yesterday night, as a concession for the fact they couldn't patrol due to tonight's charity gala. Damian was currently staying with Jon, and would be sleeping at the Kent's for a sleepover night.
"Mr. Fenton will be in attendance for tonight's gala," Alfred said as he walked into the kitchen.
Bruce look up so quick, Tim swore he heard his neck crack. "Danny's coming?"
"Indeed, Master Bruce."
"Cat Grant is still on the guest list?"
"Yes, sir," Alfred answered dutifully.
"Perfect," Bruce said as he let a smile stretch across his face before he stood up. "I have some errands to run, I'll see you tonight," he said as he swept outside of the room.
Tim frowned at the strange behaviour before he turned towards Cass who just shrugged and went back to her breakfast.
"Who's Danny?" Tim asked Alfred as he stood up to get himself another cup of coffee.
"Mr. Fenton and Master Bruce were quite close when they were younger. The media went so far as to call them childhood sweethearts," Alfred started as he swapped out the espresso pod Tim had gotten out of the pantry for a decaf one, which had the teen pouting. "When Master Bruce disappeared for his 'backpacking trip through Europe', Mr. Fenton became distressed and made quite a fuss, going so far as offering a reward for information. Eventually, Mr. Fenton acquired a daughter and mostly retired from the public eye." Alfred paused before letting the corner of his lip curl up ever so slightly. "Still, when Master Bruce returned, there was apparently a very explosive and very public confrontation between the two of them. I am told it involved a good amount of tears and shouting."
"Tears?" Tim asked incredulously. Were they talking about the same emotionally-repressed man?
"Just so," Alfred answered with a nod. "They met up a few times since, but it has been a long time since Mr. Fenton was in town. I imagine tonight's gala will be very interesting."
This was disappointingly boring, Tim thought to himself as he sat by the drinks table. Everything had gone as usual, with schmoozing left and right while Bruce charmed the pants off the Gotham elite. Tim sighed. He didn't even have Dick to joke with, since he was on a mission off-planet. Just as he was considering calling Steph to allay his mounting boredom, a hush fell onto the ballroom. All heads turned towards the entrance, where Tim could see a man looking to be in his early-to-mid-thirties walking in with a young woman who bore him a striking resemblance. Both of them were quite attractive and looking very dapper in their obviously high-quality clothes but that didn't justify the crowd's reaction.
In the ensuing silence their arrival had caused, Bruce's greeting of "Danny," seemed very loud. The answering, "Bruce," was just as loud and the two exchanged a charged look and a nod before they both turned away from one another in concert.
Sound gradually came back to its previous level, but now Tim was intrigued. He grabbed a few hors-d'oeuvres and shoved them on a plate as he swerved between guests until he could get up to the balconies, for a better vantage point.
This was the batkids' favourite hideouts during galas, as it was great for making fun of some particularly snobbish guests. Tonight, it would serve for spying on the mysterious Danny.
As the night progressed, Tim noticed both Danny and Bruce giving each other longing looks when the other wasn't looking. On one occasion, Bruce even left a sentence unfinished as he caught sight of Danny, before he shook himself out of it and apologized. His conversation partners just looked at each other with gazes charged with meaning as they brushed off the apology.
At some point, Tim noticed Danny excusing himself from the conversation before he walked out of the ballroom. A moment later, Bruce did the same and followed him out. Tim polished off the last of the appetizer before getting himself back down.
He walked out cautiously, looking around for the two men when he heard voices coming from one of the smaller adjacent hallways. As he crept closer, he chanced a look around the corner to see Bruce and Danny talking to each other. He walked in closer to get a better view, only to quickly duck out of view when Bruce looked in his direction.
As Tim walked back further into the hidden nook, he had to stop himself from shrieking when he came into contact with a body.
"Yo," whispered who Tim now recognized as Ellie, Danny's daughter holding a cup of the punch and looking very relaxed.
"Hi?" Tim whispered back still trying to calm down his beating heart. "What are you doing her-"
"Shhh," she interrupted him, as she looked towards the two men. "They're getting to the good part."
Tim followed her lead and turned his attention back towards the two men.
"... I just wonder sometimes, what could've been," Danny looked into the distance wistfully, before he turned back towards Bruce, longing in his eyes.
"It's not too late," Bruce said passionately as he took the other man's hands. "We can still try again."
"No, Bruce." Danny took his hands away reluctantly, as if the very action was painful. "We're no longer the people we used to be." Then, he smiled, aching and fragile before continuing. "We have different lives now, there's no use clinging to the past."
"Danny please," said Bruce as he raised his hand to cup the other man's cheek tenderly. With a wretched sigh, Danny's resistance seemed to break as he let himself nuzzle into the larger man's palm, looking as if he couldn't help himself from seeking its warmth.
"Well, I'm up," Ellie breathed out before downing her cup. "Wish me luck!" she said as she walked off before Tim could get a chance to hold her back.
"Dad!" she called out loudly, as if completely oblivious to the atmosphere.
Danny tore himself away from Bruce's grasp guiltily as he turned towards his rapidly approaching daughter.
"Ellie," Danny said as he visibly collected himself. "What are you doing here?"
"The party was boring so I went to find you." She pouted. Then, as if just noticing the man, she exclaimed, "Mr. Wayne! We didn't have the chance to talk earlier, it's been so long!"
"Hello, Ellie," Bruce answered back warmly, despite looking still a little raw around the edges. "You've grown a lot since I last saw you."
"Well, I sure hope so," Ellie said jokingly. "It's been what, five years?"
"Yes, it has," Bruce answered, but he was looking at Danny who was doing his best to avoid Bruce's pleading gaze.
"If you're tired of the party already, why don't we go home early?" Danny suggested studiously avoiding the other man's eye.
"Really? We can go?" Ellie asked hopefully.
"Yes, sweetie," Danny said as he ruffled his daughter's head playfully.
"Dad! My hair!" she whined, as she patted it back in place. "Alright, give me a minute to get my bag, then we can go."
With that she started turning away before she stopped herself and turned back towards Bruce. "You should come visit us sometime, Mr. Wayne! Dad wouldn't say it but he misses you." With that, she turned with a twirl of fabric and started walking towards the ballroom. Danny ran a hand through his hair as he sighed.
"You missed me?" Bruce asked, one part teasing and one part hopeful.
"You know I have," Danny looked up at the taller man, sounding defeated yet fond.
"I missed you too," Bruce breathed out as he brought his face closer and closer, until their lips were almost brushing-
"Mr. Wayne!" A voice came from the ballroom.
The spell broke and once again, the two men separated.
"I have to go," Danny mumbled as he took the chance to extirpate himself and start back in the same direction his daughter had gone.
"Danny, wait!" Bruce got out. "Could I really come visit you?" he stuttered out breathlessly.
Danny stopped, but didn't turn around as he answered in a voice clearly rough with emotions. "You'll always be welcome, Bruce. You know that." And then, he walked away.
Bruce kept his eyes glued onto Danny's departing back, until the other man's figure was swallowed in the crowd and disappeared. The sigh he let out was full of melancholy, but when he looked up again, his gaze was determinate. A beat later, he followed Danny into the ballroom.
Tim stayed where he was for a moment, just contemplating everything, before he started to move, but before he could come out of hiding, there was a movement in front of him. Freezing in place, he looked on as Cat Grant came out of what seemed to be her very own hiding spot. She looked around for any witness before she too snuck back towards the ballroom. Tim let his head hit the wall behind him.
What the hell had just happened.
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