#Enter the Aardvark

[lgbtqreads]

Fave Five: Queer Fiction About Politics

Fave Five: Queer Fiction About Politics

For more, check out this post. The (Un)Popular Vote by Jasper Sanchez (YA) Something Like Possible by Miel Moreland (YA) Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston Enter the Aardvark by Jessica Anthony White Houses by Amy Bloom (Historical) Bonus: These are all “realistic” fiction, but for political SFF, check out The Councillor by E.J. Beaton, Fireheart Tiger by Aliette de Bodard, and Winter’s…

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#Aliette de Bodard #Amy Bloom #Casey McQuiston #E.J. Beaton #Enter the Aardvark #Everina Maxwell #Fireheart Tiger #Jasper Sanchez #Jessica Anthony #Miel Moreland #Politics #Red White & Royal Blue #Something Like Possible #The (Un)popular Vote #The Councillor #White Houses #Winter&039;s Orbit

[emmathompsonegot]

Oh my GOD I just realized the Greg Tampico in Enter the Aardvark is called that because Reagan was born in Tampico, IL 🤦‍♀️

#filed under really really obvious references I absolutely did not get #mine #enter the aardvark

[26lettersandmanyjourneys]

4/5 ⭐️

Thoroughly enjoyable

#26lettersandmanyjourneys #books #reading update #pic #enter the aardvark #jessica anthony

[woman-respecter]

AND ANOTHER THING about rwrb. if u want a book that is about a gay guy in american politics read enter the aardvark. actually this is an insane rec bc its nothing like rwrb in almost every way including in that its actually really fucking good. one of my fave novels.

#if we lived in a just society enter the aardvark would have a film adaptation instead #i think tumblr would have a heart attack abt the mc being a republican tho lolllll

[nontrivialproof]

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping being 87 minutes long. That’s how you make a fucking movie.

#raina.txt #like enter the aardvark in that way #popstar

[trans-corvo]

I've now officially finished more books in the last month than i have in the past 7 years. Every one so far has been excellent, but I do have to alternate between fiction and non-fiction because a lot of the fiction makes me insane.

#special shout out to the humans and enter the aardvark #i cant and wont be normal about those two

[lizlemondyke]

I have read too many books about taxidermy this year.

#the number? 2. #the books? enter the aardvark & mostly dead things #my opinion? easy take it or leave it. won’t change ya. #the former is a better Story the latter has some cool gay sex.

[black-lizard]

The Liar’s Dictionary, Eley Williams

#the Liar’s dictionary #Eley Williams #quotes #words #i read this last year #and earlier that year i also read enter the aardvark #another book that alternates between past and present #and gay romance

[feminismisstillahatemovement]

Cowpatriarchy Theory

A rock-climbing trip to the countryside and a wander through its verdant fields of bovine ruminants led me to reflect once again upon a great truth about life, sex differences, men and women:

Put one bull into a field full of cows; come back a year later and you’ll find a field full of calves (and one very happy bull).

Put one cow into a field full of bulls and a year later you’ve only got one calf (and one very unhappy cow).

This seems to me a very good illustration of the differences between how the male and female of our own and other species came to be valued and treated: Eggs are costly; sperm is cheap. Women are valuable commodities; men are expendable utilities. This is the deepest and most fundamental reason we all - women and men - innately care for women more than we do men.

As a man, it certainly would be nice if women cared for and sought to protect every man they see more than other women - heavenly, in fact - but reality is what it is. And we are what we are. Men and women aren’t ‘equal’ because the sexes are - by definition- different. Those differences are necessarily strongest the closer we get to any matter related to reproduction (and hence sexual behaviour, experiences and expectations), but also when it comes to anything related to the survival and protection of the offspring such coupling begets: to protect the children, one has to also protect the women from which the children are borne, to put their safety and survival first, too.

And so this is why there is not now, nor has there ever been, any human society which sends its women down the mines and out to hunt and into war while the men stay at home and play with the children. If, hypothetically, there ever was a society that tried to exist that way, then clearly they died out (or were wiped out) without leaving a single trace of their existence anywhere (and for pretty obvious reasons).

This is not ‘patriarchy’ or ‘male privilege’ or any other ideological entry in the feminist lexicon: the universal division of labor between the sexes is something we evolved over millions of years because that’s how we best survived in a hostile natural world. As civilizations sprung up and cities appeared, the hunter/gatherer roles of man and woman rapidly became more abstract, complex and sophisticated: the man went out to work in an office instead of going out to hunt, and the woman kept house and cooked food in increasingly comfortable kitchens instead of tending the campfire in the rain.

It was only in the 20th century, with the rise of industrialization and the safety and simplicity of factory and office work - along with the introduction of the pill in the 1960s - that women could actually begin to enter the modern workforce on something like an equal footing to the men already there working to provide for their wives and families at home. But because of simple biology (men can’t bear children, so every human being must be carried and nursed by a woman) men are still going to have to work more hours and provide more resources than the women (which, of course, goes a long way to explaining much of the purported ‘pay gap’ in men and women’s lifetime earnings).

Anyhow, the point is: we didn’t invent our fundamental gender roles, any more than the birds or the bees or the zebras or the aardvarks or the cows or the bulls did theirs. Hence, human beings today gravitating towards these roles is no evidence of a secret conspiracy to keep the women down - indeed, the universally-practiced division of labor was introduced by society - and mother nature - only to put the needs and safety of women first.

And that, class, is the main reason the fundamental tenets of all feminist theory are so perplexingly wrong. I know you've been wondering.

[not100bees]

girls5eva is exactly like enter the aardvark

[cctinsleybaxter]

Evil richboy problems disorder compilation Col. Charles Cathcart in Catch-22 (1961) / Patrick Bateman in American Psycho (1991) / Congressman Alexander Paine Wilson in Enter the Aardvark (2020)

#books #catch 22 #american psycho tag #*gay evil richboy problems disorder compilation #cathcart is a little less concentrated into one paragraph so just my favorite example

[four-birds-in-a-trenchcoat]

Okay so I've been thinking of this post here for a while now:

We all know this post is hilarious, but really how well would the Justice League handle the Cloudburst and the Arkham Knight's tank? Could they survive? Could they take out the tank? So as a little thought excersise I'd go through on a member by member basis and how well they'd handle it. Welcome to my unofficial dissertation.

(If you think I'm wrong or missing something I probably am but let me know, I'd love to hear other people's thoughts on this.)

SUPERMAN - MOST LIKELY

It's been consistent in most media that Superman is not affected by fear gas unless it's mixed with Kryptonite, however this is explicitly stated to be the most powerful version of Scarecrow's toxin, so for the sake of argument we'll say it will affect him, just slower than a human. Superman would have three practical options in that case: Use super breath to blow a path through the Cloudburst, hold his breath, or survey from above with X-ray vision to minimize contact with the gas.

WONDER WOMAN - VERY LIKELY

The Arkham Knight's Tank shouldn't be an issue to the Man of Steel; the shots would absolutely knock him back in a head-on approach but as soon as Superman makes it to the body of the tank it's all over.

Being an Amazon warrior and their princess, Diana's rigorous training has given her a strong mental fortitude, strong enough to at least once break through fear gas. (A/N: I haven't read much Wonder Woman and ultimately it's up to the writer but from my understanding this is what I've come to) Personally I think she's the most likely to last as long as Batman did in the cloud. If Wonder Woman can make it to the Batmobile (which seems to filter out the air from the Cloudburst) before the fear gas takes over her mind she'd be able to cross the first hurdle.

Based on the scenario I described, Wonder Woman could absolutely take out the Cloudburst tank using the Batmobile. But what about other methods, just for fun? In a one-on-one fight Wonder Woman could take out the tank, albeit just a bit slower than Superman. She likely wouldn't go for a head-on attack but could break through the shell of the tank with ease. Problem is this hypothetical only applies if you argue WW can handle the fear gas directly, which I do not think they would.

GREEN LANTERN (Hal, John, Guy, or Jessica) - SOLID CHANCE

If you don't think this Batman would trust Diana with the Batmobile, she still has the Invisible Jet but all things considered it wouldn't do much. The Cloudburst is so thick it disrupted even the Batmobile's sensors making any attempts to fire at the tank a literal shot in the dark. What's more is the jet doesn't have the precision anti-tank weaponry that the Batmobile has. According to Wikipedia the Invisible Jet (in Wonder Woman 1984) is based on a combination of the F-111 Aardvark and Panavia Tornado GR1, of the two the highest caliber of precision weapon is a 27mm revolver cannon, which comparably is a joke to the Batmobile's 60mm cannon needed to take out the heavy drones and tanks. Ultimately the jet would not be much help against the tank but it came to my mind so I had to discuss the potential of it.

THE FLASH - UNLIKELY

Green Lantern's weakness is Yellow due to being the color of fear (well actually it's because of a battle against Parallax but he is a physical manifestation of fear so...). Because of that it's unlikely that anything whichever Lantern constructs wouldn't even break through the cloudburst. I wasn't sure if there was ever an instance of a Lantern dealing with fear gas and somehow the ONLY instance I could find is Justice League: Doom where Hal was able to conquer the effects after learning it's an illusion. So if whichever Green Lantern would attempt to fight the Arkham Knight would need to be very experienced.

Assuming Green Lantern can enter the cloudburst without issue, the tank is a goddamn joke. They could create a high powered sniper rifle, their own batmobile, or literally a hand with a Tech Deck to grind the tank and smash it.

The Flash still needs to breathe when he runs so he can't just dash in and punch a hole in the tank. His best solution to clear the path would be to form a tornado around Gotham in order to dissipate the cloud, but that's a serious risk to everyone left in the city, not to mention the collateral damage of scattering the Cloudburst across the sky. So no, I don't think Flash could get past the fear gas.

MARTIAN MANHUNTER - UNLIKELY

If you negate the gas itself it wouldn't be too hard for the Flash to destroy the tank. Dash around it so fast it starts to break apart, run around the Earth a couple of times and punch its weak points, all things considered the tank is the easy part.

As a side effect of watching his entire race dying, J'ohn J'onnz's has a crippling fear of fire. That doesn't even require fear gas to create, just a bit of gas and a match. While we have no real reference on if Scarecrow's fear toxin affects Martians, but it can then this fight is over before it even began.

Like most members with actual powers, the Arkham Knight's tank is simple enough to take down. Being as strong as Superman not to mention invisibility he could walk right up to the tank and destroy it before the Knight even knows what happens.

AQUAMAN - UNLIKELY

This was interesting to think about because I didn't actually know if Aquaman even has to breathe above water, but from a bit of research yes he does in fact breathe oxygen on land. This means the Cloudburst would affect him on land. What's more, the final appearance of Scarecrow in Batman: Arkham Asylum has him threatening to drop the chemical into the water, poisoning Gotham, meaning to some extent fear gas can travel through water. HOWEVER, the version of the gas in Batman: Arkham Knight was already dispersed into the form of a cloud, making it a lot harder to disperse into water. So hypothetically, Aquaman could create a torrent running through Gotham's streets as a shield against the cloudburst, but he could not leave the water.

Aquaman is incredibly strong, but not as strong as Superman or Wonder Woman. Given the hypothetical of needing to stay in a constant stream of water, any direct shot from the cannon would knock him loose and he'll have to face the fear gas. Putting this together, Arthur Curry would have to be fast and precise aiming to the tank's weakest points while moving very fast lest he get shot. While I considered Aquaman just hucking a whale at the tank could probably work, the streets of Gotham are not built for that kind of attack and would cause tens of millions in property damage, not to mention possible unnecessary casualties.

------

This covers the founding members of the Justice League, but for fun I'll point out a few more members worth thinking about.

------

CYBORG - While I don't think it's possible for him to make it through the Cloudburst, I would be remised if I don't acknowledge that he could hack the Batmobile in order to take out the tank.

PLASTIC MAN - I think Plastic Man might be the only member with a natural immunity to anything Scarecrow throws at him due to his entire biology being changed to plastic. That said, he poses no chance against the tank.

RED TORNADO - Since he's a robot, fear gas does nothing to Red Tornado. However the Cloudburst is powerful enough to damage electronics. Whether or not the weather will affect him would be up to the writer, but that fact might not even matter due to just being able to blow it all away.

The tank would absolutely devastate Red Tornado in a one-on-one fight meaning he'd have to move really fast with direct strikes to the weak points in order to defeat it.

DOCTOR FATE - This isn't even a contest he could just teleport the Arkham Knight and his tank to Hell.

------

In doing this thought experiment I have come to realize that the plot of BMAK would be incredibly boring with any other hero because they'd decimate the Knight's militia in ten minutes. Furthermore, Batman is one of the only League members with enough willpower to brute-force fear gas, making him more or less the only one insane enough to take on this threat. So from all of this I think it is safe to say that he is in fact NOT stupid for not calling the Justice League. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

#batman arkham #batman arkham knight #batman arkham series #Batman #I put more thought into this than I did most of my college assignments

[artist-ellen]

Madame Olga

One of the Witches who competes for Arriman's hand in marriage is Madame Olga..... she politely threatened/enchanted one of the Todcaster-resident witches (one of the competition qualifiers), to go on a world trip vacation. Giving Mme. Olga leave to buy her cottage and enter the competition to be the future Mrs. Wizard of the North. Her usual lifestyle is running a enchanted/cursed beauty salon in London, and inheriting her mysteriously disappearing husbands' funds.... and growing her necklace of suspiciously human teeth.

Madame Olga's "witch type" is Enchantress, as the book describes, in the tradition of Circe and Morgan Le Fay. Enchanting/transforming men is her specialty and she is a formidable contender in the Which Witch Competition. Her familiar is a Giant Aardvark that she pulls around on a rhinestone collar-leash. I've dressed her in 1970s power-business lady attire of course.

I am the artist!!! Don’t repost without permission & credit! Thank you! Come visit me over on: https://instagram.com/ellen.artistic

#madame olga #which witch #eva ibbotson #book redesign #redesigning villains #lnart #character design #costume design #historically inspired #digital illustration #historical fashion #historical costuming #1970s fashion #teeth #good witch bad witch #witches

[outrage3]

Reading Enter the Aardvark again. I missed you Alexander Paine Wilson you crazy bastard. I missed you Jessica Anthony

[mask-of-prime]

VG: The Lion of Theluji Mountains - PART 1

Ever since the Outsiders joined the Pridelanders, an intense rivalry had formed between the Pridelands' majordomo and the Outlands' former scout. When Simba had asked for the Morning Report, Zazu and Vitani both scrambled for the opportunity.

Zazu cleared his throat, "All seems to be in order, sire --" "Nothing out of the ordinary, sir." Vitani cut in without thinking. "Ugh... The tree dispute between the baboons and galagos have died down. Surely, a 'monkey off your back'." Zazu straightened, "The wildebeest are grazing in the same spot as usual, if that's 'gnus' to you. And --" "Most of the herds were wrangled back in their place. There are still stragglers." the lioness felt herself becoming competitive. Zazu cleared his throat, "Th-The rock pythons can't quite 'wrap' their minds around why the aardvarks are being rather 'nosey' --" Vitani scowled at the hornbill and quickly returned to her stoic gaze at the King, "The overgrazing these last few months led to a premature --" "Ah, as I was saying --" "Last night --" Simba couldn't keep turning his head to listen, "Alright, alright! Enough! Okay? I just... One at a time, please." He turned to the lioness and gave an initiative nod, "Vitani?" Vitani, rather pretentiously, stuck her tongue out at the old majordomo in victory. "Poppycock..." Zazu muttered to himself. "Well, she's new to the Pridelands." Simba shrugged, "Vitani, what about the herds?" "Well," Zazu put his wings to his hips, "just so you know, young lioness, it takes years and years of reporting and knowing the Pridelands like the back of your wing to get to my level!" Without Zazu looking, Vitani rolled her eyes. Funnily enough, the King did as well, just as bored of the majordomo's ramblings as he always has been, ever since he was a cub. The lioness continued her report about the herds' statuses as the sun continued to rise. ____ Days later... Too much time had gone by. Zazu still hadn't come back from his business trip. The pride watched as the King paced around the main den, worried for his old friend. "It's been almost two days, now," Simba muttered, "it isn't like him to be this late. Something has to be wrong. Really wrong." Suddenly, news came, as if on cue. "Sir!" barked a creature emerging from the spot of earth outside the entrance. It was Gopher the mole rat, a long-serving scout of the majordomo. "News from the Underground; Zazu is reported to be missing in Theluji Mountains. He was last seen entering strong currents." "The blizzard," Simba sat up, "I should've known!" The Guard's eyes widened. What was a blizzard? "I should've had him deliver my message to King Sokwe after the storm." Simba turned to the lionesses, "Forgot how harsh the wet seasons could be, there..." Vitani may have rivaled Zazu, and she may have thought he was a stuffy, perfectionist, gossipful interloper, but she never wished a travesty like this upon him. After a hushed discussion with the Guard, Vitani suddenly spoke up. "We can bring Zazu home." "You?" the King was wide-eyed, "You don't know the terrain. Kion's Guard needed escorts, even." "You could get lost, too!" Tiifu cried, "Then how will Zazu get home? It's not worth the risk." Vitani gently loosened herself from Tiifu's seemingly clingy embrace, "I appreciate your concern, but someone's gotta find him. We're big lions, he's a small bird. I'm sure my Guard and I can handle it better than he can." Simba sighed, "Alright, but be careful with the weather. It can get unpredictable. Beware of ice and winds. You could freeze to death if you don't find shelter." "We'll be back in no time, sir." the leader smiled assuringly. Tiifu frowned, and clung to Vitani again. "Tiifu," the Guard leader whispered to the lioness, "I'll be alright. The Guard and I can handle the elements." Tiifu watched as the Guard took off. "Please, please, be careful..." ____ Almost there... The Guard had walked for hours, now. The Theluji Mountains was far west of the Pridelands, already too far from what the Guard knew. "Must be it." Vitani said, looking up. "Loooong climb up." Imara sighed. Vitani lifted a paw, "Welp, here we-" Suddenly, Gopher appeared from the ground. The Guard nearly jumped. "Wait! Before you proceed..." the mole rat leaned closer, "...Beware of the beast that lives in the Mountains." "...What?" "Word from Underground is that a big, hairy beast emerges from his cave to snatch up prey." "And Zazu's up there..." Shabaha pointed out, "Hopefully he wasn't... you know..." Kasi cringed, "Oh, no... Oh, Simba would not wanna hear that..." Vitani turned to Gopher, "Thank you for letting us know." Gopher saluted courteously and sank back into the hole. "Come on, girls." Vitani prepared to leap, "Till the Pridelands end..." "Lion Guard Defend!" the rest finished in unison. ____ The Guard miserably wandered through the blizzard, unknowingly going in circles as winds from the storm had covered their tracks in the snow. The poor savannah animals shivered hard. Their eyebrows and eyelashes appeared gray from frost. Their eyes, themselves, couldn't help but constantly shut from the dry, crystalline wind. In their closed eyes, they hadn't noticed Vitani slowly taking on a strange appearance as days passed on their trek. Her fur seemed to be growing more and more dense, and long. Her signature tuft hung over her eyes, protecting them from the ice, but blocking them from seeing. They'd eventually found a small, uninhabited cave to rest in. When the Guard finally laid their eyes on Vitani, they gawked. "What?" Vitani glared, "Why are you looking at me like that? Do I have something on my face?" "Vitani..." Kasi slowly approached, "Your fur... i-it's..." "Like a CLOUD!" Shabaha cried before excitedly leaping to Vitani. With no impulse control, she proceeded to feel Vitani's soft coat. "Wha-?" Vitani slapped Shabaha's paw away, "Quit it! What are you...?" "Odd... must be a dormant trait," Tazama spoke up, "I mean, you've always had an unusually long coat, even back home..." "Are you saying she adapted to the climate?" Kasi asked. "Must be so." Tazama looked at her leader. "We can talk about this later." Vitani stood up, "Come on, Zazu can't keep waiting..." ____ Later... The Lion Guard seemed to make it to another part of the mountain. The change in air pressure meant they were much higher now. They called for Zazu, their voices giving them away to listening ears all over the mountains... Vitani was pulled from her intense focus as her ear swiveled to a sudden scraping sound. Pebbles skidded down and brushed against her shoulder. She glanced up, confused at where it came from. A pair of eyes stared from a cave above. The winds of the storm masked the deep rumbling heard from inside. Too disoriented from the loud, nearly-opaque wind, Vitani couldn't get herself to find the source of the falling pebbles. She stared a few seconds longer. "Vitani, I see a new landmark up ahead!" Imara called, loud enough to be heard over the winds. Vitani shook the "Ah, coming..." The eyes watched the lioness catch up to her group. Soon, the eyes disappeared into the darkness as the rumbling faded out.

To Be Continued... ____ (Wintertani is back! This December, I thought about fleshing out the story of Vitani's winter coat by adapting it into a Vitani's Guard installment, given the fitting snow themes. Speaking of which ngl it was fun to draw all this snow. Easy too

I was gonna have more panels where Vitani would compete with Zazu, and Gopher would deliver the news to everyone (there needs to be fanart of him, underutilized little guy). Maybe I can do that thing where I add something the next day. But idk. While I kinda wanna give this a colorful storybook feel, I wonder if the fic, itself already has a clear enough picture for certain scenes.  Heck maybe I'll post art of those in separate uploads 🤷 The first scene was inspired by some awesome headcanon I saw floating around Reddit where Vitani and Zazu would be sassy rivals towards each other, given Vitani's former scout position in the Outlands paralleling Zazu's majordomo/ambassador duties in the Pridelands)

#The Lion King #The Lion Guard #Vitani's Guard #TLK #TLG #Vitani #Shabaha #Kasi #Imara #Tazama #Simba #Zazu #My Art

[thediverismylove]

tier ranking every book i read in 2022

god tier: the world cannot give, vladimir, somebody's daughter, the lost daughter, transcendent kingdom, win me something, the namesake, hamnet, fun home, sea of tranquility, woman eating, book lovers, the margot affair, easy beauty, either/or, sirens and muses, how to write an autobiographical novel, the sentence, ghosts, goodbye vitamin, the long answer, house of hunger, these precious days, everything i know about love

great tier: comfort me with apples, the awakening, their eyes were watching god, yerba buena, the school for good mothers, sorrow and bliss, red at the bone, weather girl, the maid, lost and found, the vixen, you never get it back, milk blood heat, the book of cold cases, our wives under the sea, reckless girls, seeing ghosts, siren queen, whereabouts, never let me go, let's not do that again, stiff, the return, mother in the dark, the right to sex, the borrower, want, enter the aardvark, the marriage portrait, why be happy when you could be normal, a children's bible, less is lost, i'm glad my mom died, happy and you know it, greywaren, agatha of little neon, flight, delilah green doesn't care, post-traumatic, our missing hearts, the book of goose, boy parts

good tier: people like her, the other black girl, five tuesdays in winter, in my dreams i hold a knife, dial a for aunties, the heidi chronicles, a novel obsession, problems, the woman warrior, the painted drum, last resort, things we lost in the fire, mother/land, cleanness, a mind spread out on the ground, the upstairs house, the carrying, the need, a room with a view, finlay donovan knocks em dead, dress code, true biz, one italian summer, when the reckoning comes, never saw me coming, the third hotel, kim jiyoung born 1982, all you can ever know, the hacienda, woman of light, the english teacher, this thing between us, the house on mango street, the days of abandonment, they're going to love you, the seas

ok tier: something new under the sun, disability visibility, real queer america, caleb's crossing, bread givers, they never learn, drive your plow over the bones of the dead, intimacies, little rabbit, all girls, flying solo, you think it i'll say it, animal, cult classic, white girls, fake like me, writing down the bones, the performance, the house across the lake, grand union, acts of desperation

bad tier: the view was exhausting, hope leslie, black water sister, mona, bringing down the duke, adele, acts of service, the life of the mind, catch the rabbit, first love, three rooms, all this could be different

shit tier: the love hypothesis, dead collections

#a pretty good reading year!