#I need more mutuals who spend ungodly amounts of time on this app

[floral-hex]

Made some coffee because I need the boost

Going to go shave off my beard next because I like the occasional clear cut before growing it back and also no one ever sees me so it won’t matter how baby faced I am for the next week.

Going to stupidly retry buspirone later tonight. If you’ve followed my “lore” (and I’m sorry if you have), the last time I tried it over a few days, it only gave me extra anxiety and made me feel hot and incredibly uncomfortable. Maybe that was a fluke. Maybe it was interacting with the antidepressants I had just upped my dose of. Regardless, we’ll give it another shot and if it goes bad again, I’ll just take a couple benadryls, conk out, and not worry about them again.

Okay, I love you.

#my anxiety has just been nasty lately #I’m working on the logical mental part of that but a good chunk of my anxiety & depression is due to unchangable health problems #so for those worries I can’t reason away I’m relying on medication #and I think I’m ‘brave’ (or foolish) enough to give buspar another shot #i don’t want to take a benzo or anything tonight #I took 2 klonopins last night and that seemed pretty nice but I don’t want to make that a habit #especially since doctors don’t want to prescribe them unless really really necessary #so for tonight I’ve got my second cup of coffee and I’m working on distracting myself #gonna shave off this gross beard and if I could I’d cut off my long hair #my hair is too long! #I know that’s blasphemous to say but dang it’s getting to be a bit much #also my therapist said I need to apply for jobs before our next meeting #I don’t want to (fingers crossed) get a job interview just to roll in with this gross hair #NOT THAT HAIR IS GROSS! I love you hairy people! #but I’m bad at trimming facial hair and I haven’t had a haircut in… half a year? more? #so I’m all split ends and uneven trims #and I sweat easily so I need to chop some of this all off before it gets too hot #why am I writing all of this? it’s not pertinent or important or exciting or #so anyway how are you doing? #I need more mutuals who spend ungodly amounts of time on this app #not to talk to. I suck at talking. I just like seeing people on here. doing their thing. being alive. interacting with them. it’s nice. #okay this is enough rambling #ok i love you take it sleazy #you can ignore this #text