#Worst Homestuck Ship

[davekat-sucks]

#Homestuck #Worst Homestuck Ship #DirkRose #Dirk x Rose #Crotuna #Cronus x Mituna #Mituna x Cronus #Dark Hearts #Bad Touch #Dirk Strider #Rose Lalonde #Cronus Ampora #Mituna Captor

[homestuckinning]

Meulin <3< Aranea <3< Kankri panel edit for myself!

#homestuck #homestuck edit #kankri vantas #meulin leijon #aranea serket #panel edit #beforus' worst book club #meukrinea #idk how to ship name them

[cringefail-clown]

AS SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN A JAKEHAL LOVER FOR YEARS (as evidenced by @dirkjakehal and @lomax) I AM SO DELIGHTED TO SEE SOMEONE TAKING IT TO THE MASSES.... thank you for doing gods work

these bitches got me in a chokehold and im making it everyone elses problem

#lil hal #hal strider #autoresponder #jake english #jakehal #haljake #homestuck #i love this ship bc its dirkjake but make it even more insane #“violence as the expression of love” that thrives with dirkjake but remove love from the equasion #jakehal just wanna beat the shit outta each other #on the other hand they make each other confront their own failings and make each other work to be a better person #jake the social coward english vs hal the i hide my true feelings behind the unfeeling ai mask strider #its the blackrom at its best #calling out their failings to make the other person better #and also kissing #they have the FLAVOR the SPICE #also dirk would combust if they happened which makes it 100% better LMFAO #like dont get me wrong i think they would fall for each other eventually #but the basis of this relationship is def “i hate you because you make me see my worst traits” #and its A GOOD THING #THEY BOTH NEED IT #ask

[worstshippoll]

ROUND ONE: PART TWO

Sasuka Uchiha/Sakura Haruno (NARUTO) VS Vriska Serket/Terezi Pyrope (HOMESTUCK)

#naruto #sasuke uchiha #sakura haruno #homestuck #vriska serket #terezi pyrope #worst ship poll 2023

[psiimaid]

@homestuckss gift for @jadeneppy !! here’s erinepquius/blue tiger shark watching documentaries on troll ancient rome :3 eridan’s pick, but eq and nep take an interest in the hoofbeasts and gladiators respectively

as well as one.. particularly crispy doodle lol. i know you said you needed more equius and eridan emojis for discord, and if you know what you’re looking for i’d be happy to draw them!! either way i hope you have a nice holiday season and a bright new year!!

#homestuck #eridan ampora #nepeta leijon #equius zahhak #do not know how to tag this ship lmao. thank u babes for having the worst names to combine ever #homestuck secret santa #tag

[nana2009]

moirail and i were talking aboat our otp similarities and this is the end result♥

#homestuck #genshin impact #<- brain damage combo #you will never kno the true context #the two worst fandoms with the most obnoxious ships combined #how bad can it be? #implied xiaoven #implied davekat

[yusiyomogi]

i'm so used to small fandoms, that i'm kinda baffled by some things in dm fandom. like, i never realized that shippers can be so annoying, especially for a story with 0 romantic relationships. i just. can't adapt to the reality of big fandoms anymore, i guess.

#and i used to be in homestuck fandom! #my brain was rewired at some point ig #at some point i'll just stop looking at fandom content #people who ship popular main dudes are the worst offenders obviously. the usual #smaller ships can be cute but i still prefer characters' dynamics in the manga #text post

[vriskabot]

saw you rbed that shipping bingo a while ago so you dont have to answer this but davris?

i woke up got on tumblr immediately and saw this. i will never not answer a question about davris.

#davris #homestuck #q+a with vel #Anonymous #tag later #I HAD TO THINK ABOUT THIS ONE A LITTLE...... #i dont think theyd hate me for shipping them i think theyd just be confused. at FIRST. #then after they get together theyd be down with it #also hemmed and hawed over whether or not kissing could fix them and ultimately decided it could #dont get me wrong theyre both still clinically unwell. but now its just in a way that doesnt affect other people negatively ADSJHAG #except sometimes it does because i DO love it when dave is a prick that cant help himself when it comes to terrible women. #and just how terrible she can be (i can make her) is a big fat spectrum #and sometimes its just FUN to have her genuinely be the worst person in the world

[worstshipbattle]

round 2: measure their crimes

see below for their list of crimes:

oscar/ruby

gamjane

homestuck

idk anything else about this ship but i think that's enough

#worst ship #ship polls #ship tournament #polls #homestuck #rwby

[fefairys]

like people are literally making jokes about how people are going to get murdered at this event. holy fuck.

i went to a lot of (pretty big in the earlier years) homestuck meetups from 2014-2018 and like homestuck cosplayers in general have always been such a kind and welcoming group in my experience...

it seems kind of um! bad! that people are making jokes about homestucks being like. "crazy" like in a dangerous way....

#like im trying to think whats the worst thing thats ever happened to me in the presence of homestucks #and the WORST thing i can think of is just. arguing over ships. like im dead serious. #like arguing over ships being “technically not incest” like that was the worst part thats the worst that happened to me lsdkfjsdf #i know other ppl have experienced worse things i know some firsthand stories from old friends as well #but like jesus can we cool it with straight up ableism please #the elitist cosplayers just stuck to their own circle and no one liked them #everyone else was just having fun together #being kind and welcoming and accepting and encouraging #so maybe chill

[srijellyfishtempura]

Actually something so cruel about vriska turning all her friends into sprites post-retcon like yeah sure they're back to life but why did SHE get to decide who came back and also being a sprite is only useful in terms of sburb, as we can see from davesprite. Is vriska turning tavros into a sprite not just another example of her abusing him and relegating that iteration of him to irrelevancy?

#homestuck #like with davesprite it's different: he knew what he was getting into #although actually NOT because doesn't he express some regret about it after cascade when John and Jade discover him on the ship? #isn't there something about how he feels neglected and forgotten about?? #being turned into a sprite feels like the worst fate of a Homestuck character tbh #also jasprose and davepeta like jasprose says specifically that they wanted to just be happy but they can't because of the nature of their b #eing

[davekat-sucks]

#Homestuck #Davekat #Dave x Karkat #Karkat x Dave #Red Knight District #Scourge Sisters #Vrisrezi #Vriska x Terezi #Terezi x Vriska #Dave Strider #Karkat Vantas #Terezi Pyrope #Vriska Serket #Worst Homestuck Ship

[frozenhi-chews]

I just realized that both Panspam and Wheatcake fill in all four Quadrents. I am so freaking mad

#panspam i can understand. that one is an enemies/rivals to lovers plot and it was kinda made that way. even b4 i read Homestuck #but WHEATCAKE??? Pancake and Wheatley??? WHAT??? #granted its probably because their relationship is MUCH more complex than Spamton and Pancake's #its literally: #one-sided-enemies-to-idiots/friends-to-enemies-to-friends-to-FINALLY-lovers #the one-sided enemies being Pancake thinking that Wheatley was genuinely an enemy until she realized that he was trying to help #like. okay!! i can see it!! they are definitely in all four quadrants!! #IT HIT ME LIKW A TRUCK REALIZING IT THO #Homestuck has been the best and worst thing that has happened to my life #self ship stuff #spamton <3 #wheatley <3 #the cake doth speak

[russelldworld]

You ever have a ship you really like, but then it becomes cannon and it’s just… the worst possible version of that relationship. Like bottom of the barrel fanfic, written by a young internet addicted teenager trash, except it’s not written by a teenager but by grown ass adults. And it just, kills whatever you liked about the ship, because it basically says the least interesting version of that ship is cannon. So every one copies the shit out of it and now the ships been reduced to this hallow husk of what it was, and you just can’t stand it.

any way this post is about Davekat.

#Homestuck #homestuck2 #homestuck^2 #homestuck epilogues #like fuck what they did to Davekat man #It use to be my fave mlm ship #But it’s just so… bland post retcon #Where the bickering #where’s karkat’s begrudging acceptance he likes this idot #Like I want Dave to have nice things #But damn if it isn’t just dull #And how they used Jade to prop up this fucking cardboard excuse for Davekat #The worst part is all my other Dave ships are girls cause like none of the other troll guys have that kind of chemistry with him #John is not a homosexual (or June is not a heterosexual whatever) #Having his date his Bro’s old bf is weird #And I don’t do strider cest #But a lot of the girls just fit with him so good #Jade and nepeta have this sincerity to the that plays well of his attempted to cool for school attitude #And Rez and Jane are masters at cutting through strider bull crap and getting to his soft stupid center #Granted classic Davekat arguably has both those things #But that’s classic davekat and I honestly just can’t ignore what it became #davekat

[worstshippoll]

ROUND ONE: PART TWO

Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas (HOMESTUCK) VS Sonic the Hedgehog/Shadow the Hedgehog

#homestuck #dave strider #karkat vantas #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #worst ship poll 2023

[superhumanfoods]

We need to talk about Sending Rocks.

You probably don't understand what that means. That's fine. It's a weird little example I made up, and I'll explain.

I'm the creator of the near-future cyberpunk podcast SINKHOLE. SINKHOLE is weird, short-form, nearly impossible to explain to people, and utterly unmonetizable. It's also got a very healthy listenership for something so esoteric. (I promise season three is coming; life just keeps happening, constantly.)

Because of that, I have a reputation as a weird little indie creator. And if I were to run a crowdfund, I could set up a donation tier that was literally just

"I will go outside, find a rock on the ground, and mail it to you."

and most people would find that funny and charming. I think, at worst, people might find it puzzling, but they'd still opt in out of curiosity.

A lot of you would let me send you rocks.

Now we need to talk about the re: Dracula crowdfund- about the zines. A handful of people got very upset about the perceived lack of quality present in the zines.

That caught me off-guard. To me, a zine should always be kind of janky. You should be able to tell exactly how far down the pile your specific zine was based purely on how committed to hitting the fold lines the person folding it was. Zines are handmade and should feel handmade.

So it seemed like people were complaining about the zines being zines, and I didn't get it.

And then I realized something: it's not about the zines. It's about the fact that they were coming from Tal Minear.

If Tal Minear ran a crowdfund and set up a donation tier that was just

"I will go outside, find a rock on the ground, and mail it to you."

I would give it about a day before someone found a way to turn that specifically into a talking point about how Tal doesn't respect the audio drama community.

Tal Minear cannot send rocks. The zine was never the problem. The way people think about Tal is the problem.

We need to talk about how this community keeps trying to reinvent classism based on nothing but vibes and follower numbers.

I'm going to tell you something you already know but probably don't want to admit: the independent audio drama scene is to the independent film scene what a fish tank in a dentist's office is to the ocean.

The biggest names in this community are just a step up from being nobodies.

If you went outside right now and spoke to the first person you saw on the street, the only non-BBC fiction podcasts you would have any realistic hope of them knowing are Welcome to Night Vale or Archive 81- and the latter only because it got turned into a Netflix show, which means that they might not even realize it was a podcast first. There's also a chance they'll have heard of The Magnus Archives, but it's not a guarantee by any means.

Now, this last one I've mentioned to a few people, and was surprised to get a lot of pushback. There seems to be this thought that no, of course everyone has heard of The Magnus Archives.

No. No, man.

You're doing the Homestuck thing. I hate to hurt you like this, but you're doing that thing people did where they assumed everyone had at least heard of Homestuck.

There are people in your life that have never heard of Homestuck.

The Magnus Archives was a mini-zeitgeist in which the fandom engaged in wild speculating, plentiful shipping, and lots and lots of aligning yourself with a specific Fear.

And it was never as big as Homestuck.

I'm sorry. Jonny Sims is not a household name. That's simply the truth.

He is also in this fish tank with us. As far as I am aware, he has not escaped to begin acting in feature films or begun voicing characters in massive video game franchises. Slay the Princess was pretty cool. It's not exactly fucking Assassin's Creed, though.

He doesn't even have a Wikipedia page.

And notice how my metric for breakout success involved going to other, better-known mediums? That's because a breakout success in this community involves getting a blurb on Buzzfeed or in Cosmo. There is no audio fiction podcasting elite. The idea is hilarious.

Even Markiplier doesn't count, because he's YouTube royalty. He's not famous because of The Edge of Sleep. The same is true of any celebrity. They're visitors. They didn't get their break here.

Tal Minear is not your landlord. They're a slightly bigger fish in the same tank as you that likes to poke around in the muck a bit more than you personally enjoy. And, well, you cannot argue that Tal's position as showrunner of re: Dracula justifies framing them that way.

Because the thing is, I'm not just the creator of SINKHOLE. I'm also the showrunner and head writer of Mayfair Watchers Society as of season two. Showrunning and writing is most of my income these days. Tal and I are very comparable in terms of the material power we wield. This isn't a secret.

And yet, a lot of you would still let me send you rocks.

Now the actually important thing.

We need to talk about how this exact illusion, this fanciful idea that there are real industry goliaths in this fishbowl, has already been used to justify the mistreatment of marginalized people.

When Tonia Ransom brought up the issues she had with how the AnonymousAD tumblr had characterized her crowdfunding campaign, this is the reason why people felt they could dismiss and ignore her. Because yes, she's a black woman speaking out about having been wronged, but she's also a "Big Creator," and therefore it evens out.

It doesn't even out.

A lot of the most successful creators you know in this space still have day jobs. I spent yesterday and today doing inventory at my retail job. I spent hours poring over shitty little badly printed tags and biting back swear words because our owner will not let us close, so there were still customers in the store, actively buying the things we were trying to count.

This Us vs Them shit has got to stop. It's nothing. It's a parody and a sham. If you tried to explain it to your grandmother, she'd give you the exact same reaction as if you had tried to tell her about drama in the Homestuck fandom.

Because it's the same.

And you don't get to use it to justify being shitty to someone who you know perfectly well would deserve your humility and understanding if you weren't pretending they were your boss.

Who can send rocks is not and has never been a reflection of real power or privilege. Deciding someone cannot send rocks is just a convenient excuse to disregard their perspective when it makes you angry or uncomfortable.

At best, it's tilting at windmills. At worst, it is punishing your peers for daring to defend themselves or speak out against injustice while being marginally more successful than you.

#audio drama #enough of this #it's been going on for a while and getting progressively worse #none of this Big Name Fan shit #this is fandom toxicity #and we're not even a goddamn fandom