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astrologyobservationsss · 3 days

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Random Observations

#4 synastry

5H OVERLAYS

SUN ☌ AC

SUN ASPECTING MARS

URANUS ☌/△/✱ PERSONAL PLANETS

PLUTO ASPECTING INNER PLANETS/POINTS

🍨 PEOPLE’S PERSONAL PLANETS IN YOUR 5H tell me if I’m wrong but, in my experience you can't stop smiling. They bring you joy and with just a look you start smiling (I guess this won’t happen if your 5H or the planets falling in you 5th are afflicted). I have some examples with two friends. With one, their Moon is falling in my 5th and with the other it’s Venus. One night, after meeting with some friends, we spend some time the three of us and literally we where kids laughing and making each other smile. Both of them produce me that feeling, but the second one in a more romantic way (even that I feel attracted by the Moon)

🍨 PEOPLE WITH SUN CONJUNCT YOUR ASCENDANT you look alike, and people can view similarities between you. For example, my friend follows an instagramer (christylevich) that has her Sun precisely conjunct my Ascendant. She always send me posts of her, telling me the resemblance. I also have this one with my sister -in a wider orb 2º-, same again. One more example could be my cousins Sun conjunct a friends of mine Ascendant. The other day I told her, WOW, you remind me of my cousin. And then I realize about the aspect. But in this case, my friend has her Mars conjunct my cousin Sun, and their suns are in opposition, so there's more added to it

I just noticed that all this examples happen in Virgo 🧐

🍨 SUN ASPECTING MARS I experienced this aspect several times, with hard and soft ones, and I can say that it’s SO attractive. The last example that made me want to write about this aspect was the trine. I have double whammy with tight orb with one of my work colleagues. In air (Libra-Aquarius) and earth (Virgo-Capricorn) signs. Apart from other good aspects that we share -trying to isolate this one- I would point out that we like how the other makes things. Since the beginning I was physically attracted to him. And he told me that he likes how I work. There is attraction. Although he shown me signs of that, the trine is more gentle than the hard aspects. With the square and opposition double whammy I noticed that the contrary can happen. It always depends on the natal chart of each individual and other aspects BUT, there is a feeling of “I don’t understand how you do things”. This happened to me with a flatmate. Even I accept her and she is nice, sometimes I have this feeling of, "why would you do that?"… (not proud of it)

🍨 URANUS ☌/△/✱ PERSONAL PLANETS LOVE-THESE-ASPECTS! Every person that I had this aspect with was amazing. Since the beginning I had 0 shame about being weird. In other words, I could be myself without restraining. But if I had to choose I would choose the SUN-URANUS as the best one. Being yourself is funny. There is no judgment between you. You feel alive and want to be with that person. It’s similar to the other aspects, but because there's different energies involved it subtly changes. With the VENUS-URANUS there’s that freedom-feeling that it’s comfortable, and in my experience, the Venus person will feel the attraction straight away

🍨 YOUR PLUTO ASPECTING THEIR INNER PLANETS/POINTS you can’t express this feeling with words. It's just something that happens with both of you. I have the VENUS-PLUTO double whammy—☌ to my Pluto and ✱ my Venus—with my best friend and it’s an aspect that creates glue. Is the level of deep understanding, there’s no secrets between you. Also, the conjunction is on the 4H, creating that level of openness to the private life. We also have MOON ☌ PLUTO and IC, again producing a deep level of emotional support and trust. On the other side Pluto negatively aspecting your inner planets/points, can be manipulating, but that’s another story, long enough to make a new post. What I can say is that it always depends on the maturity of the Pluto person, and how this planet is aspected in their natal chart. I always found Venus-Pluto aspects in the natal chart as a softener of that “toxic” intensity

Hope u liked it! :) And as always, I love to hear from your experience, so we both learn. Let your comment if you have something to share <3

#plutosynastry #synastry #astrology #uranus #pluto #5th house #5 house #sun #mars #sun conjunct ascendant #sun trine mars #sun conjunct mars #sun square mars #sun opposite mars #Venus in the 5th house #Moon in the 5th house

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sailorblossoms · 21 hours

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Simon "not feeling anything"

“It was fine, it was sex” is one of those lines I keep coming back to because what does that mean. Even removed from context, in a scale of things that are supposed to be mind-blowingly fantastic or, at the very least, actually good, just "fine" will be perceived as negative. If you prepare someone a meal and they say "it was fine, it was food," you're probably going to think they didn't like it. If someone went out to pick a dress for a special occasion, and they go "it was fine, it was a dress" about the dress they picked... if you don't think they fucking hated that dress, you're likely assuming that person doesn't care about dresses at all. Like, dresses do not cause positive emotions at all. Picking a dress feels like nothing, perhaps. Maybe it's even it's even boring as hell.

A big component of that line is that it sounds dismissive, even more so because it comes with a Simon who is trying to change the subject. He would very much rather not talk and think about this at all (his final word on the matter is a dismissal as well – "it doesn't matter" – which comes in the context of highlighting the difference when you actually want it... "this is how it feels like when you're in love and turned on and so I actually want to do it, whatever works between Baz and me, as opposed to that other time when it wasn't like this and it was the opposite"). But there's something else I want to highlight here...

Fine, in the context of negative things, might not necessarily be seen as positive, but as something that you can handle.

In that sense, maybe it was "fine." In a fucked up way, maybe it was something that could be handled because it felt like nothing. (If this is something impossible for you to imagine, I invite you to look up conversations of real people who fall somewhere in the acespectrum sharing things in the vein of "I tried sex to see what all the buzz was about and it felt like literally nothing. Like washing my car: a tedious exercise. Maybe we're wired differently" – it's obviously not literally nothing, you can very much feel if something or someone touches you, but maybe you get the idea of what I'm trying to say.)

Simon has completely convinced himself that not feeling anything is fine – it's part of why his feelings for Baz are so difficult, and not just when it comes to deciphering them... having them at all is difficult. It's so much. The lack of feelings is what he liked about dating Agatha, after all. Having different interpretations is obviously alright, my own interpretations are richer after seeing others point out things that made me see things I didn’t notice (or saying things that sound wrong and interrogating “why does reading this make me feel like I just licked a goddamn lemon”) but sometimes, somethings are just missing the point. The point is that Simon doesn’t have those feelings for Agatha. If he had been attracted to her, he would have experienced certain feelings he would need to negotiate with. But he never had to do that – he's thrown into the reality of his feelings for Baz with no map, no guidelines, no clue of what do with himself at all. His attraction for Baz throws him into uncharted territory, not just in terms of intensity, but in terms of feeling anything of that nature at all. That doesn't fit into Simon's fucked up idea of "fine." Baz notes Simon goes from 0 to 100, without realizing how much that truly applies. (I'm sure I have other posts that are basically: before discovering he loves and wants Baz, Simon's only intense emotion that he's familiar with is anger, and it would be easy to mix up that heat with attraction to Baz, with whom he's constantly picking fights with, seeking his attention...)

Part of the point is that Baz is the first time he’s dealing with what attraction and romantic love truly feel like, and on top of that, is intense as hell. It's The Love. The Attraction of a lifetime – of many lives, even. Of all of them. If Simon ever had such feelings for Agatha, she would never have felt safe. I don't think people truly realize that when they speculate "there must have been the flames of something" between them at some point. If she had awakened those things at such a precarious and controlled part of Simon's life – we can't ignore how much his emotions had an effect on his crazy magic – it would not have been "fine." She wouldn’t have been an armor, for him ("if you’re as beautiful as her" — not only conforming but standing out in terms of beauty standards is a form of “standing out” in "the right way," of being aspiration — you are untouchable — the opposite of being neglected or rejected for someone as him). "She's the type of person a boy like me is supposed to want" wouldn't have been safe by itself if she also made him feel like exploding (his attraction for Baz, when Simon tries to act on it, feels like going off).

For the record, Simon's "fine" is not the good type of fine. It's not the type of "fine" that makes you sigh in relief. This is a guy who could get shot and say "I'm fine" while bleeding out. And that's just the thing. Simon "not feeling” is necessary so he can live according to others like he does, but it’s not that he doesn’t actually feel anything. He's not made of stone. But he represses his actual feelings, even without realizing (sometimes he's not repressed he can't even identify the thing being repressed, it's just hidden away somewhere... until he can) and seeks situations that don’t awaken anything in him. It's what's more comfortable... and you have to keep in mind this is someone who's used to be uncomfortable. Discomfort is familiar. It's "fine." Being in situations he doesn't actually want to be is "fine" because he can't even identify his own wants. It's not even a factor.

But it's not really fine in the good sense of the word. If it was, he wouldn't self-harm through that conversation, for once (using physical pain to distract himself from the internal discomfort – external discomfort feels good in comparison). It's not "fine" to date someone long-term when you don't feel anything (other than friendship, very tellingly) for them. It doesn't "save you" from feelings, it just makes you sad.

Since Simon avoids processing, he lacks vocabulary to describe what’s happening. Not thinking about what he wants also means he doesn’t question what he doesn’t want... and even if it doesn't seem like a big deal, doing unwanted things still has effects, even if you avoid processing them (I'm sure I wrote that post so I'm not going to elaborate here but I''ll say: associating sex with pressure, not pleasure – only food is associated with pleasure before Simon has sex with Baz – is one such effect). “It was just going through the motions” is Penny’s vocabulary. It's something she says to Simon when he's still not ready to process that everything he believes to be just "fine" it's not. The way he's been living up to that point (according to what everyone expects of him, following a map, not ever making choices about anything ever outside of battles and stalking Baz – Simon's only "me time" is about Baz) is not fine. If you make a list of every moment Simon acts genuinely, truly happy on the page? Most of them are about him being close to Baz. Kissing Baz, touching Baz, taking to Baz. Making choices about how to live his life (by itself unfamiliar, and does not feel "fine").

Sex with Baz is not fine. And it's not just because it's better than fine on a scale of "was it good?" (even acknowledging something like "I had sex and it wasn't good" it's feeling something – negative feelings are also not fine if the full force of them are processed, they're only fine if they can be pushed aside and repressed). It's not fine because it makes Simon feel so much, and after being so used to nothingness, it's a complete shock to his system. It's going from 0 to 100. It's bigger than magic – even the one he had (and back then, releasing his magic was the only type of release he knew... it's no wonder that another type of release would be so difficult, after all, the only type of release he's used to is destructive... but that's another post, too)

#simon snow #baz pitch #simon snow trilogy #snowbaz #baz grimm pitch #baz x simon #carry on #wayward son #awtwb

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libby-for-life · 2 days

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How do you think this Adam who has memories of death and suffering love and just his long life and after life would deal with the fact that in Eden Death and all these bad things aren't even a thing yet. This Lucifer and Lilith haven't done anything to hurt him yet(aside from lying and sleeping together and avoiding him but now they love him and want him so thats fixed).

They think he is their sweet naive Adam but I wonder if part of him will be frusterated because he sort of ISN'T. would he ever snap at all this affection they want to give him because he can't understand why NOW? want to lash out and make them hurt because when they didn't notice 'Their' sweet adam was replaced? like dude is agrown as man and technically older in experience than these two..had a bunch of kids..went through alot of stuff..death twice even.

lucifer punching him over and over in that final battle despite giving into mercy thanks to charlie..would he wonder if the entire universe was reset? did everything he experience just.... not happen? was it just a vision of the potential future? a bad dream? does he think this is some elaborate punishment like heaven likes to give him and his loved ones when they get prideful or not obedient?

Would he ever miss the versions of lilith and lucifer he knew from the timeline he experienced despite the hurt and pain just because they would be comfortable in their familiarity?

its really interesting because Lilith and lucifer seem the ones more in control with a plan while they believe adam is acting odd and they want to know why but they basically still see them as their normal Adam.

while WE know the balance is a bit different because Adam has knowledge and has known them longer it seems cuz of the memories....

like when Adam fell from the tree it startled them both but i wonder if adam will have moments of being scared or on edge because he remembered when death and actual pain and hurt was a thing while lilith and lucifer might not notice/realize because those havent been invented yet.

considering lucifer is a angel...would he try to look a bit more into why adam's behaviour has changed?

like it seems they think its just adam realized that Lilith was sneaking away to be around lucifer and that adam and lonely and upset they'd lie and that he might have picked up on the distance....which could explain his behaviour....but WE know Adam's change is rooted a bit more deeply than that...will they notice more behaviour changes that don't quite line up with things?

I wonder if adam would ever kind of treat them like kids since these are younger versions of the people he knows? even if he's now in his younger body and technically the same age as lilith his mind/memories are older?

if adam is particularly talented at sex stuff...would lilith and lucifer wonder how he got that good without them realizing?

would adam ever have flashes of feelings like shame of his body or of being naked while lucifer and lilith pick up something wrong bt they won't have the context since shame was a punishment that hasn't been given yet?

and he can't really address it because he is trying not to be caught?

would they even believe him if he came clean about his memories? or is it his best bat to make sure no one has to suffer from the sins and free will? like before lilth seemed bothered about adam just doing as he was told and how it felt like he was going through the motions and just accepting everything at face value so she let herself doubt his ability to choose...but considering this adam know exactly what happens when they break the rules and can be an educated decision...would adam have more conviction in his choice about following the rules now that Lilith would notice or would lucifer and lilith be bias and think they know best and that adam is just being too cautious?

considering lucifer in now both their lovers(i guess) does that mean lucifer won't get in trouble now or would they want Adam to keep it a secret from the other angels?

Is adam startled at the sensitivity of his body even if his mind remembering being used to it?

I wonder if Lucifer and Lilith will catch on that Adam likes touch since Lilith seemed aware that Adam seems to like to cling and be close like the monkeys even if he tried to distance himself? would they start reaching out and touching and holding Adam first more?

i wonder if Adam will do more stuff for music to be made and stuff?

would Adam try working out to get stronger just in case he ever gets kicked out of Eden again?

dude wants to be upset at them so much but these versions are so sweet and feel so young vs the ones he knew and haven't done the worst yet. I wonder if he ever notices aspects the versions HE knows in his normal timeline now that he's comparing them to more naive honest versions of themselves...like they think they are so sneaky but is it kindof cute compared to their future versions? does he notice lucifer looks sincerely happy here and aspects compared to the more bravado version who was smug and kicked his ass but who was definitely also depressed? how lucifer likes creating things and was so gentle now but in that future needed someone else to snap him out of his rage....(though to be fair adam can probably understand a fathers protective rage). would adam compare this lilith to the one he made a deal with in the regular timelines? would lilith have a front to? but be more aware this lilith isn't really doing stuff for long planning just yet.

I wonder if Adam will also notice aspects like how this lucifer is treated by heaven or get lilith to actually tell him why she'd lie instead of hashing it out properly since dude WAS a father so probably could realize people don't react the way they do out of nowhere.

Does this Adam ever reflect on how he reacted to get where he was in the final battle before he was stabbed?

though I guess he never really knew why he was in heaven anyway so randomly getting thrown into the past wouldn't be the weirdness thing over all he's done. I wonder if he'll ever think about how he's killed people and seen people die and how this lucifer and lilith have no idea about that aspect and how scary it can be...hmmm.

will the other angels catch on that something is up?

Okay, so a lot to unpack from the Theirs au of yandere!Lucifer/Adam/yandere!Lilith. Read that if you don't want spoilers.

Okay, so Adam would definitely have some points where he does feel overwhelmed by it all. He has experienced more and it's hard to forget all that. He's going to sometimes think if what he experienced was even real...then why was it so vivid? He will even panic when something reminds him too much of his past...or is future? Adam isn't so sure....best not to think about it too hard.

Adam is definitely going to fight their love (read:obsession) and he's going to try to avoid them as best as can. He lasted a week before Lucifer found him in a cave. (Theirs! Part 2). Adam also learns what happens to angels, or humans, when they try to fight their love. Heaven has it's own set of punishment...

Adam wouldn't treat them like kids because they don't look like kids. They don't act like kids and they all have had sex so it would be weird for him to think of them as kids.

He would be conflicted about the *other* versions of Lucifer and Lilith....he doesn't want to think about that. It hurts too much.

Lucifer and Lilith think that they know better and they will delude themselves into thinking Adam will need them. (I'm headcanoning that they gain Knowledge by themselves before even attempting to eat the fruit.) He will try to fight them, but being constantly told that he needs them, being held against his will, and having sex with them until he's brought to sub space, well, it's a bit hard to fight them. He eventually will succumb to their will.

Adam was...okay at sex. But, despite Lilith being relatively new to it and Lucifer showing them all what he learned in Heaven, Adam still feels inexperienced simply because Lilith and Lucifer are *better* at sex than he is. You can have all the knowledge but if you can't implement it, then it's useless.

Lucifer will want Adam to keep their relationship a secret, the other angels would get furious if they knew that he had defiled the first man and woman of humanity.

He will have times of body shame, but Lucifer and Lilith are quick to assure him and love him and hug him until he stops saying them.

They catch it early on that Adam is touch starved, but will fight them, so they hold him against his will until he's calmed down and is docile. (They wait until he stops fighting and gives up due to exhaustion.)

Lucifer and Lilith want to do everything for Asam so they do. Adam doesn't need to work out or do anything too strenuous because they will do it for him.

And, well, they can be sweet to Adam. But they are *very* possessive of Adam. They won't tolerate anyone touching or being with Adam. They will get rid of anyone who thinks they can touch what is theirs. Be it some cherub or a new human that could pop up...they will eliminate the competition. Without Adam's knowledge of course. No need to upset him. (Part 5 of Theirs)

If anyone ever catches on to what they're doing, they will all be thrown out of Eden. Possibly Hell. Lucifer and Lilith won't care as long as they have Adam. Adam will be depressed for a while, but he isn't alone so *eventually* he gets...sort of better.

They will have fronts that they keep in front of Adam. They will try to hide their darker nature that keeps reeling their ugly heads. Adam will eventually see through it, but even now, he still thinks they are...well, weird and touchy and don't listen but he doesn't think of capable of anything truly nefarious.

Not yet anyway...

#hazbin hotel #adamsapple #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lucifer #send asks #Lucifer/Adam/Lilith #yandere lucifer #yandere lilith #Yandere Eden au

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midnightshaze13 · 1 day

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I must say something because since I attended the Eras shows I feel this and I need to say it.

I've been a fan since crazier came out and she appeared on the cover of a disney magazine that my mom got me because I liked the song and wanted to know more about her, around 2010. Since then I've respected her and her work and came more and more in love with her writing and music.

Lately, I've seen on social media and at the shows of the eras that many people who attended recognized to have had hated on her in the past, but they now "adore her". Something about this feels wrong to me.

Literally, "the old taylor is dead" was made to win over the general public. She had to metaphorically kill all her previous versions that people didn't trust or tolerated; these versions of herself with which she managed to make her name in the music industry AND those are the same ones they all rejected and now they sing with their mouth full.

She was FORCED to get the approval of people like these who pointed and criticized every little nonsense*¹ about her in order to be able to do what she does now: succeed, fill stadiums with thousands of people and create a legacy which will be in the music History books.

What I want to get at is that Taylor Swift, in order to continue growing in the industry, has had to overcome and prove wrong all of you who were at hater position 2, 3, 10 years ago.

In order to be valued and respected for her job which is creating music and for her is specially writing her own songs, she was forced to learn how to dance better to beat the "she doesn't know how to dance" allegations; she had to change her dressing style and many other things like that to be what people wanted her to be so she can have the recognition she deserved previously and all.

To this day I think many don't like Taylor Swift for what she is and has been. Many people attending the Eras are people loving the results of her growing into something different to earn that respect and admiration. And most of those love the performance of a (now considered) cool girl on stage that she puts on every night on the Eras more than her for what she is and more than the music.

But to all those I must say, she's on the bleachers. That's how it was and that’s the narrative most of them rejected her for. It's not okay to me that they love her now that she's cheer captain.

If these people would have known taylor swift at that age when she wrote those and wasn't "cool" they may would've bullied her for the same things they claim to love her for now.

These are the same people who have bullied me and my other Swift's fans friends for decades just for us liking taylor's music. I had to battle and fight for tickets & a seat at The Eras Tour against people who used to bully me at school for liking her music.

In her own words: maybe you've reframed it and in your mind you never beat my spirit black and blue. But I don't think you've changed much.

I welcome those who discover her recently with open arms. But to the "haters to fans" that "now I can see how good she is" no thanks.

I've been here through a lot watching from a distance (tumblr, youtube) and I always dreamed about going to a Taylor Swift's show. I watched the videos of the speak now world tour when my parents wouldn't let me go because I was 13 years old. I watched the Red Tour while experiencing my first romantic heartbreak and the 1989 world tour when I was 16 and decided to not have boyfriends for a long period of my life. When I started uni and had the clean speech tied to my folder binder to see it every day, these people looked at me like if I was GREEN. And then at the Uni I watched the reputation stadium tour every late night before falling asleep wondering what it must felt like to be a part of it and I grew more into the desire of traveling to a show but couldn't afford it back then. The Eras Show was amazing, it absolutely blew all of my expectations, it truly is my once in a lifetime experience that I'm so grateful for. To have been able to experience all the past eras that I dreamed of in my past.

It feels wrong to see every person who once bullied me for dreaming about it out loud back in the day standing there making their own of the lyrics that for so many time were mine to scape real life and dream.

*¹nonsense: there was this time when every day we had a battle on twitter and other social media of people attacking taylor for the absurd fact that she was blonde, rich and famous and also thin. It was like that back then, they didn't had anything else to attack her for.

#taylor swift #the eras tour #ttpd #the tortured poets department #lyrics #ts the eras tour film #eras tour #haters #fans #swifties #eras attendees #conclussion #thank you aimee #no i don't like you

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spooky-dice · 3 days

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re:thistlesprings transracial adopteeness, I think a lot of it is played for comedy, but so was Fabian’s whole leviathan arc so “child physically cannot easily traverse the space in which they live” also feels like fair game for serious analysis.

I think the house thing might’ve gotten retconned in later seasons, but judging from the ep 3 scene in s1, Wilma and Digby are very good to emotionally connecting with and supporting their child *when* it’s something they’ve also experienced. So it’s like. They’re very determined to make gorgug not feel different than them, to the degree that they ignore accommodations or different needs that she has, and this results in gorgug feeling like he’s different from them and that there’s something wrong with him.

and then there’s also the fact that they could’ve just. Given baby gorgug to someone else? I think they were very very determined to love her and be good parents just as it’s own goal and that kind of drowned out the logistical issues with it and then there’s always the problem with dnd race, which is that they’re treated as species

yeah, i don’t think it’s a negative that fantasy high doesn’t explore this, it’s just something that comes up time to time and i think is interesting to explore for gorgug’s character, esp when so much of his arc is about not fitting in the boxes he’s expected to.

i always interpreted wilma&digby as a sort of comedy parody of well intentioned liberal parents that are hyper aware and very educated (like how they handle sex ed) but feel overwhelming and sometimes miss what’s beyond the surface. they’ve got whole binders on parenting, but they’ve also got big blindspots, mostly surrounding gorgug’s size, and his rage. one of my fav things about fantasy high is how complex the parents are. i do think there’s a lot of love there, but i also know what it feels like to have a white parent who excels in every other category proceed to blunder on race.

the thing you said abt them wanting him to feel the same, in ways that sometimes exaggerates the differences, is very real. equality≠equity. there ARE things that make gorgug different, and he can’t really talk to them abt it if they can’t acknowledge that.

fhjy gorgug was a highlight of the season for me. it really affirmed him as a multifaceted character who struggles to exist within the system. barbarian vs artificer, gentle vs rageful, born to orcs vs raised by gnomes, and then going on to prove that it’s not about picking sides but just existing with both, as a whole.

using fantasy racism as an allegory for racism is always messy, since the exaggeration of differences in species is so built into the dnd system (and tolkien fantasy overall) so it bleeding into actual plays is pretty inevitable. d20 handles it pretty well imo, it’s just one of those things.

#i am a nuance enjoyer and i KNOW w&d are sort of deliberately flat characters but. but #i KNOW the joke is Big Guy and Little Parents. but the complexities got to me #ty for the ask :)#dimension 20 #gorgug thistlespring #fhjy spoilers

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choimari-achoochu · 2 days

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Playing... "This Love" by Taylor Swift

"How good can that certain love make you feel so good to the point it's too/down bad?"

Non-idol!Lee Heeseung x F!Reader

Tags : Angst, Hurt, fluff, comfort, NOT PROOFREAD, Reader fell first but Heeseung fell harder<3

"You kissed my cheek, I watched you leave. When you're young you come back to... To what you need. This Love is good, this love is bad. This love is alive back from the dead (oh-oh). These hands had to let it go free, but, this love came back to me. This love, left a permanent mark. This love is glowing in the dark. These hands, had to let it go free, but, this love came back to me."

You never really know where it all went wrong when the time came you and Heeseung had to break up. He was the perfect man. Always soft and caring, patient, he was the epitome of perfection, good looking with a lot of green flags. Being someone who was more than what you asked for, you hardly thought that a time would come where you would be separated from each other. More so, after 4 years of relationship.

You met him during your second year of college, he was in his third year. You had the fattest crush on this basketball player who aced every single class he took. So of course, you approached him. He was reluctant to even respond to you at first, but warmed up to your cheery personality sooner or later. Or maybe, too soon. You experienced love at first sight, but he slowly fell for you as time went on with the both of you hanging out.

He found you pretty cute, very cheery and bubbly. Your aura always radiates a sense of warmth that infects the whole room, the whole building if not. He was attracted to how your cheeks flush everytime you see him, how a shy smile always creeps to your face when he winks at you during a game, how your smile and laughs absolutely make his day.

You were what he considered constant happiness in his day-to-day routine. Sometimes when he wakes up in your dorm room after a movie night sleepover, his heart always swells with gratefulness and love when there, laying beside him on the bed, was your body presses against the sheets in a deep but peaceful slumber. He loved you so much to even ever think about being separated with your absolutely pure soul.

Yet, there in his dread, he's standing before your figure on your doorstep. His hands trembling and anxiously tapping his thighs as he gulps, not knowing what to say. When all of his academic pressure was weighing on his shoulder to the point he pushed you away, does he really deserve a second chance? You're not sure yourself.

"What are you doing here, Hee?" You asked with spite but pain at the same time.

"I-..." He paused. He wasn't trying to find what words to say, no. He was trying find the words to associate right after "...sorry...". But what should he say? "I'm sorry, I hurt you because I was too occupied with my own problems" ? Or was it "I'm sorry, I had to prioritize myself over our relationship and your feelings because I had "unintentionally" hurt you due to the fact I had assignments and projects to pass that led to me irrationally blurting out the words 'Let's break up'... " ?

"I don't know, Y/N, fuck..." He ran a hand through his hair and slightly pulled on a few strands.

You both know what he wants to say but you both take for granted the silence between the two of you, no matter how uncomfortable it may seem due to the tension.

However, he broke the seconds of silence with a sharp inhale and spoke again. "I'm so fucking sorry and regretful of the things I've done that I just— I don't even know how to start saying that sort of shit without thinking about how stupid it is. How stupid my actions were, how stupid it is for me to even seek for you after what I've done... " He stalls as tears well up in his eyes as he, with all the courage he has, looks into your eyes. You don't know if the pain and love you still absolutely have for him and from him seeps through the cracks of your broken hearts with the way he's trembling.

"...But I'm so fucking sorry. " He breathes out, a feeling of relief washing over him as he finally let every thought and emotion out of his chest. The only thing that remained was the feeling of dread that was to come after you reject his apology. You would definitely do that after all those stunts he pulled during your relationship—

"I forgive you." You say as you take your eyes off him, letting him process what you said without the burden of thinking you don't mean it. But as you break eye contact, his eyes go wide in surprise, an ineffable feeling washing over him as he thinks his ears are betraying him. So he asks...

"What?" He mutters but loud enough for you to hear.

"I said, I forgive you." You fiddle with your fingers as you answer him. "Also, it's not stupid."

"Huh?" He tilts his head in confusion, he feels he's too broken to even be able to think properly.

"It's not stupid to apologize. And I absolutely understand how you prioritized your studies above our relationship—"

"No, Y/N. Baby, that wasn't okay." He cuts you off.

"Yes, sometimes those sort of things can get in the of our relationship because, as students who want good grades, we have to put it first rather than our relationship. But that doesn't mean outburts are reasonable just because of all the academic stress. I'm happy that you forgive me, but please never seek for something less than what you deserve from me, Love." He reaches to meet your hand with his trembling ones for him to hold, he slowly lifts it up to his mouth and kisses the back of your hand.

Tears stream down your face as the raw emotions you've felt from the past week comes rushing back to you. All the pain, the misunderstandings that made you confused, the loneliness... Everything was too much to bear all st the same time.

"I'm sorry, too, Heeseung." He said in between sobs and he pulls you to his chest, wrapping you in his warm and comforting embrace.

"Don't say sorry. There's nothing for you to apologize for. I was in the wrong..." He mumbles sweet comforting word, but are still coherent enough for you to understand, as he kisses the top of your head.

"No, no..." You protested and shook your head. "I'm sorry for not being understanding and still being clingy. I should have been more mature." You sniffle as the words almost seem like queit mumbles, but Heeseung understands. He always does. How much you doubt yourself. It breaks him to be one of the cause for the cacophony of your negative thoughts to be the only thing you hear because of his actions. He softly runs a hand through your back as he sighs.

"Shhh, baby... You did nothing wrong. I wish I could have done better for you, but I'm here to do right now. Will you please give me a chance to make things right between us?" He pulls away, but his hands are still firm on your waist. He stares at your face.

He kisses your cheek and asks again, "Hmm? Please, Love?"

The moment you give him a soft nod, he wraps you back into arms once again and heaves a sigh of relief. He is never gonna lose you again. No, never. The week where he had to be away from the warmth you brought into his light was enough for him to suffer in darkness, all alone... He doesn't want that again. For the both of you. He doesn't wanna hurt you anymore, don't want to leave you all alone again, and you want the same thing. To never be away from his calming and comforting presence that he brings due to his love for you.

"Please never push me away again."

"I won't. I never will. Not again, never in the lifetimes where I have your love with me."

@strxwbloody

#lee heeseung x reader #lee heeseung #enhypen x reader #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen fic

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coddda · 16 hours

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Light Yagami is so insane specifically for the way that he manages to contradict himself in every way possible. Like I think about it All the time.

He doesn't make mistakes. He makes the same mistakes every single time in every single universe, just in different ways.

He sticks strongly to his own beliefs. He betrays himself and his own ideals by doing exactly what Light Yagami would do, no matter what version of Death Note it is. He betrays himself by seeking out a "better" means of justice, he betrays himself by trying to protect others, by just living and being bored and trying to avoid ever doing wrong. His very existence is a betrayal to himself.

He is proud to be his father's son, he wants to live up to his image more than anything else, he takes after him so much and people can tell. He uses his father for his own gain until the bitter end, sometimes it kills him. He loves his mother and his sister so much. He doesn't see them for the majority of the story, sometimes at a certain point it's like they're forgotten altogether. He won't think of them when he inevitably dies.

He asks himself what Light Yagami would say or do. He is Light Yagami. He asks himself what Kira would say or do. He is Kira.

He thinks everything he does through carefully and methodically, sometimes to unnecessary degrees. He is So fucking impulsive, sometimes his plans are outright clumsy.

He has a successful social life and can make just about anyone like him in just a few minutes. There is hardly a single genuine personal connection he has to another person in the series that he does not outright abandon or squander. He has everyone on his side, even if they think they're against him. In the end he realizes there is nobody left, that he is alone and all that is left is himself and his enemies.

He'll have a literal breakdown and collect himself completely within the next half a minute as if nothing happened. He compartmentalizes emotions like it's second-nature. He is losing his shit in his own head. He never stops thinking.

He acts almost disturbingly normal and polite. He acts and thinks like he does not know how to be normal, under everything he is bitter. He is the most put-together guy ever. He is an actual mess.

If you ask him if there's ever been a point where he's actually told the truth, he'll find the most roundabout way to tell you that he is "just like everyone else" in that regard. If you ask him if he has any understanding of the human heart, if he has ever experienced hunger, if he actually has interest in academics, if he knows how to love, he would tell you that he is just like anyone else. Yeah, that was all a reference, sorry. Do you think Light Yagami has ever sought friendship?

He sees himself a God. He is so, so terrified of death. He wants his life to mean something. He manages to only destroy everything and anyone his life has ever touched.

His name is spelled "moon". It's pronounced "Light". He's everything because he's at the top of the country, he's nothing because he's satisfied by none of it. He's everything because he now has everything he's ever wanted (he came across it by mistake), he's nothing because no matter what he fails and life goes on, every single time. He wants the world to know of his existence. By the time he dies most people won't even know who Light Yagami or Kira really was, what the full picture really looked like.

Every single time Light Yagami, without exception, will eventually betray himself and make the same mistake and faces the consequences and eventually die, then cease to exist. He makes mistakes, he does things that are wrong. He will almost never realize that he was wrong. He will lie to his enemies, allies, friend, family, accomplice. Does that mean he only tells the truth to himself? Well. That would have to come with the assumption that he's ever told the truth even once, from the moment he was born.

#death note #dn #light yagami #yagami light #death note analysis #sorry this is a mess i thought of this while brushing my teeth and just kinda ran with it #he is everything (/neg) he has been stuck in my head for so damn long get him out please #my ass really thought i was gonna finish my episode 25/26 thought draft but uh nuh-uh. light yagami Brain Blast. enjoy?#i genuinely feel sorry for anyone who has to read this tirade i'm like half awayke okay this is my apology for my yapping #coda analyzes stuff #light's very nature is his own downfall and this is the only way it ever will be #if he cannot make his grand mistake of his own making then he will simply be left unsatisfied and he will always want to be more #but of course we know how it turns out when he does realize that he can be more #he destroys everything around him and then himself and it's all his own action and choice. it's his own nature. this is simply How he is #this is light yagami

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moirindeclermont · 2 days

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Daily thread about BridgertonS3 while we wait for part 2.

Let's talk about Pen, because oh boy I have thoughts 💭 and the short version is "you go girl, good for you, you deserve everything".

Let me start by making a huge shout out to Nicola because she is amazing. I'm in awe of her performance!

And also, disclaimer: this is a very personal opinion based on my experience and my views. Every opinion, as long as it respectful, is valid in my book because it's yours.

But, back to Pen. I do not have to imagine what it feels like pining for someone. To those who never experienced it, imagine all the good stuff about being in love with someone combined with the torture of not be able to he with that person. Don't recommend but sometimes it's just how it is.

And in this context what you do receive, in various form, is a recycled statements along the line of "you have to move on". By the way, and I know this might be unpopular, as long as you don't hurt anyone or go on stalker mode, pining is fine. It might pass, with time. It evolves and it changes, but as long as you're respectful there is nothing wrong with that.

Add to this the layer of "marrying is the only way to get out of this house" I don't blame her for trying. Not one bit.

I already touched on previous threads that I don't find shameful or pitiful asking to kiss Colin. It's over the top? Maybe, but losing hope can make people acting like that.

Moreover, I love that, in the beginning of the carriage scene, Pen doesn't believe Colin. Or doesn't want to believe him. It's been years, so of course you don't believe it, initially.

And I love that when Colin tries to go back "Forgive me" that's when she take a step in his direction. The bravery that it took to speak, I could not image it.

And afterwords, when they stop and Colin adjusts her dress 👀 and she says "what are you doing?" In the softest voice... I think that part broke me. Because imagine having everything you've ever wanted right in front of you, and still there is a part of her brain that doesn't believe it.

As proven by the "Colin?" When he steps out of the carriage. Because even when everything should be okay, but you're not used to happiness and comfort and security, it's normal to doubt.

It's heartbreaking but so real! And yes, there are conflicts that are going to be resolved, but let me touch briefly before this truly becomes an essay on the importance of representation.

Because it's rare to see stuff like this. So rare but so important. The fact that we are waiting to suspend our belief when it comes to Marvel and Star Wars, but we drew the line at this (which is much more common that people think) speaks to me about how much we still have to work on representing different body types.

So, in conclusion, this part 1 made me feel seen. Because everyone deserves love and connection (in different forms according to each). Everyone. Don't let anyone tell you different. Thank you, Pen. Thank you, Colin. Thank you, Bridgerton.

#polin meta #polin #polin bridgerton #colin x penelope #penelope featherington #bridgerton season 3 #colin bridgerton #bridgerton s3 #bridgerton #posting my essay about pen also on tumblr #daily thread about bridgerton

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achilles-rage · 7 hours

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NSFW Alphabet // Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley x Plus Size Reader

Hi besties<333 This is my first time writing so pls don’t absolutely tear me to shreds (just a little bit is acceptable though). I’m planning on making a SFW alphabet for Buck soon as well but some of the letters had me drawing a blank lol. Also, although there’s not really much mention of it, this is with a plus size reader in mind. As a plus size girly myself, it sucks to read x reader stories and knowing in the back of your mind that it wasn’t written with your body type in mind (although there’s nothing wrong with writers that do that of course). I just thought I would add to the plus size reader community because there are barely any buck fics and i believe in my heart that he loves plus size women. Anyway, enjoy <3

MDNI- 18+ Only

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

When y’all finish he’ll wait a few minutes before pulling out, head buried in your neck as his breathing gets back to normal. He’ll kiss your neck and tell you how good you were for him, before finally getting up to clean you up. After that he wants to lay with you and talk, just enjoying each other’s company, maybe y’all will make some food if you feel like it.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His: Probably his arms. He’s worked hard to be as fit as he is and he enjoys using his arms to move you/lift you while you’re having sex. He takes pride in his appearance, he knows he’s hot, but it’s an added bonus that he can lift you up and do whatever he (or you) wants.

Yours: I am of the firm belief that Evan Buckley is a thigh man. He loves how they feel in his hands, he loves how they look when you straddle him, he can’t get enough. He loves to see them jiggle when you move, or when he playfully smacks them. He loves thick thighs and I will die on this hill

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

This man has a BREEDING KINK OKAY!!! He loves to cum inside you, fucking deep into you and feeling his cum fill you up. He loves watching it slowly dripping out, so he can finger it back in. If that’s not your thing I think the next best place would be on your stomach, watching your face as he lets go, seeing the way he marks you up. He loves your little tummy, how it moves as he ruts into you, so he loves it when you let him cum all over it.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I only call this a dirty secret because he would never tell anyone about this after the last time it happened and he got fired. He wants to fuck you in the fire engine SO BAD. He can’t help but think of the way you would look as he fucked into you quickly, trying not to get caught with your dress up around your waist. He knows it’s not gonna happen, he’d never hear the end of it from anyone in his life if it did, but god he wants to so bad.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Girl have we watched the same show?? This man FUCKS!!! We all know (and love) Buck 1.0, and we know he knows what to do. Buck 3.0 might mean him changing into, well, not a sex addict, but that doesn’t mean he forgot his training (🫡). I think he understands that every woman is different, and while he might not get it exactly right the first time, he’s a fast and eager learner, watching what exactly makes you squirm and moan the most for him.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Canonically, Buck LOVES when you ride him, and I agree. He loves to watch you move yourself on him, able to grab at your thighs, and your hips, and your chest. He also loves to move you on him, squeezing your hips tightly as he sets the pace if you start getting tired or if he just feels like it.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

I mean, he’s Buck, he’s truly a golden retriever of a man and cannot stay serious for long. I think he’s a bit of a mix, he can be serious in the moment, but at the end of the day, he’s still Buck, and Buck is silly goofy.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He keeps it nicely trimmed, carpets match the drapes. In terms of his partner, he really doesn’t give a fuck. He’s seen it all and could not care less as long as he feels the way you wrap around him so perfectly.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Buck 3.0 is a man of TASTE, but that being said, I think he only really pulls out the romance during special occasions. Most of the time this man wants to freak nasty, but sometimes when he’s tired, or just feels especially in cuddly/clingy, he’ll be more romantic.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He does it pretty often, of course not when he has the option to fuck you instead (and you’re willing, of course), but if you’re not with him and he needs a quick release, he getting right to it.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Breeding: I will scream this till the day that I die, this man wants a family more than anything. Whenever he’s inside of you, he can’t help but think about how pretty you’d look with your belly all round with his babies.

Praise: Look at this pathetic little guy, he needs to be praised, he thrives on it. He loves to hear how good he feels, how good he’s making you feel. This goes both ways. He’s in your ear immediately telling you how good you feel, how well you’re taking him, how pretty you look.

Spanking: HEAR ME OUT!! While I’m not sure he would actually bend you over his knee (but honestly the more I think about it he might) he would LOVE to give your ass a nice little swat as you’re riding him. He loves the sound it makes, and the sound you make because you’re not expecting it. I don’t think he’d ever do it hard enough to hurt too much, but I think enough to make your ass a little red would definitely be something he could get behind (lol).

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He doesn’t have a ring cutter in the kitchen for nothing<3

I think he likes to have sex at home the most, on the bed, on the couch, on the kitchen counter. You name it, he wants to fuck you there. His favourite is the counter because he loves seeing you being so domestic in the kitchen. Making dinner, cleaning up, whatever, he wants you right then and there and cannot wait. He’ll come up behind you, wrapping his arms around you as he kisses your neck before slowly turning you around to face him and lift you onto the counter to have his way with you.

While he’s moved on from having sex in public places that could (will) get him fired, he’s still into it, but in less obvious places. If y’all are in his car and you’re looking a little too good in his passenger seat, he loves an empty parking lot quickie. Front seat, back seat, whatever you want, he’d be pulling you onto him as soon as he puts the jeep in park.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Girl ANYTHING gets him going, it would take one look, one touch, one word and this man would be ready to go. I think what really gets him going though is seeing you with kids or getting along so well with the 118. This man truly just wants a silly little family and someone that can get along with the 118fam, so seeing you like that has him making up a stupid excuse to leave a little early so he can take you home and have his hands all over you.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Like I said before, I don’t think he would do anything to hurt you too much, other than the occasional light spanking or biting. He would also not be into any kind of age play or pet play, he’s pro kink but it’s just not for him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

This man is a giver and I stand by this. Dear god he loves nothing more than having you spread open for him, hands tangled in his hair as he makes himself at home between your thighs. He loves having his hands gripping your thick thighs, feeling them on either side of his head. When you start to get squirmy from the overstimulation he’ll place a large hand over your lower stomach, holding you still as he pushes you over the edge again.

With all that said, he will definitely not say no to getting head. He loves seeing you look up at him while you’re on your knees, trying to take all of him. He’ll keep a hand in your hair, pulling it softly every now and then, and he can’t help but moan and whine as he gets closer and closer, eventually cumming down your throat as he squeezes his eyes shut.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

It depends on the day, but most of the time he likes it rough and fast. He loves a good quickie, meaning it kinda has to be more fast paced and rough, and he’s pretty easy to get riled up, so when you drop any sort of hint, he’s on you immediately and ready. On other days where he’s feeling extra clingy and lovey, he’ll be more of a slow and sensual guy, but I think for the most part he loves to fuck you deep and rough.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Like I said, he loves a good quickie. A lot of the time he craves a quickie before work, needing to feel you before his long shift. I think they happen pretty often, but he’d much rather take his time with you, using his fingers and mouth before he fucks you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

As long as there’s clear communication he’s down to try pretty much anything, he’ll do anything to make you happy (within reason). I think he’s also a risk taker (also within reason, he has to think about not getting fired again, of course). Buck 1.0 is still inside him somewhere when it comes to sex so he definitely loves a little risk, but he’s grown enough to know where the line is.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

While he would love to go as many rounds as possible, I think it would realistically be 2-3, lasting about 10-15 minutes each round. I think he would be the type to like having some time between rounds, tension still high as you talk and lay around before he's back on you again.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Once again, he doesn’t have a ring cutter in his kitchen for nothing<3

He likes them, he definitely owns a few toys of his own. Vibrators, cock rings, some handcuffs or restraints, he’s very open to anything that increases y’alls pleasure.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He does it sometimes not really meaning to, like he does something and you’re like….dear god…and maybe he doesn’t notice the first time but the second time he does and WILL keep going until you snap. He loves the way you get all squirmy and whiny and desperate for him, knowing you want him as much as he wants you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

So vocal!!!! Literally that meme thats like “y’all afraid to make noise in the bedroom?? i be in my girls ear like…” He loves dirty talk (on both ends) and he can’t help but let out low moans when you’re clenching around him. He also loves hearing your breathless whimpers, making him feel like he’s doing a good job, and encouraging him to pull more sounds from your lips.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

If he was in a relationship during the whole sperm donor thing, it would be the longest few weeks for both of y’all. I imagine the first time he has an appointment, you make sure you’re waiting for him in a cute little matching set, knowing how excited he was to finally be buried inside you again, hearing you whine as he fills you up. He’s so frustrated when his appointment doesn’t work out that he doesn’t let you know how it went, instead being unpleasantly surprised when he sees you sprawled out on his bed when you get home and unable to do anything about it. He wants nothing more than to rip your pretty little set off your body and run his hands up and down your soft curves, but he can’t, and it’s torture. You apologize (but he will hear none of it because it was a lovely surprise, just shitty circumstances), and instead you change into an oversized shirt and sweatpants to enjoy a completely normal (and not sexual at all) night on the couch.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

7 inches, thick, no complaints <3

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

HIGH!!! This man is thinking about sex 24/7, and if he could, his hands would be on you at all times.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Most of the time I think he stays up for a while, just hanging out and talking to you. But if he comes home after a long shift he’s fucking GONE in 5 minutes tops.

Likes/comments/reblogs would be much appreciated if you liked this! Or I would love to hear y’alls thoughts on any of the prompts<33

Also let me know if there’s any other character you’d like me to do this for (not just 911 characters)!

#911 abc #evan buckley #evan buckley x plus size reader #buck x plus size reader #plus size reader #911 imagine #evan buckley imagine #buck imagine #evan buckley x reader #buck x reader

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luck-of-the-drawings · 15 days

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[OLD ART ALERT] A COLLECTION OF SCENES FROM THE GILLIONS CATSCRATCH ARC THAT BROUGHT ME GREAT JOY. i love fishy chips especially when its just gillion being delirious and violent and hostile

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #jrwi riptide spoilers #JUST NOTICED A MILLION MISTAKES FUUUUUUUUCK BUT WWHATEVERRRRR IF I STARE AT THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA HHUURRRLLL #SO I REALLY LIKE FISH AND CHIPS RIGHT. IVE BEEN IN LOVE W THE SHIP EVER SINCE THAT NAT 20 KISS #BUT I THINK I SHIP IT WRONG. OR LIKE. I AM CORRECT BUT EVERYONE SHIPS THEM DIFFERENTLY #THE FISH N CHIPS I SEE EVERYWHERE ELSE IS SO FLOWERY AND SWEET AND ROMANTIC. AND THATS NICE! THAT STUFFS NEAT #but gillion and chip would NEVERRRR enter anything similar to a romantic relationship. chips too damaged and gillions too uninterested #I LIKE MY FISH N CHIPS ONE SIDED AS FUCK #bc 2 gillion chip is his best friend in the whole wide world but hes also kinduvagross little man that took him a MINUTE to really warm up2 #but to CHIP gillion is this powerful and gorgeous and heroic paragon of destiny and his best friend in the whole world who will #bring about the eschaton. 'i didnt believe in destiny until i met you' until i met a champion radiating with a light thatll alter the world #OHH REMEMBER THE FIRST ICE ARENA?he was so mad.still probably shaking from the ordeal.NEVER had he felt true divine radiance CLEAVE through #his SOUL like that.do you remember that moment in the forest w the bugs. an alien from the ocean; lacerating the land w lightning #when the realization flickered in chip for a moment.that the thing standing before him was more powerful than he could ever fathom #remember when grizz mentioned that the nat20 kiss was the 'best kiss chip ever experienced'. that has nothing to do w this. where was i.#LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT. BUT HEY. I THINK at the beginning chip absolutely knew that gill was smth grand n powerful n scary #when gillion revealed what exactly the prophecy was;chip got defensive and mad.sure he was sleep deprived but OOH. HES SCARED!#he believes gillion too! he believes that his destiny is to eradicate either the sea or land and that scares him!#but then he gets past it bc ultimately he trusts his bestfriend gillion so so much. he fuckin loves this dude.#he would throw himself intothe path of fire for this dude. he would boat across the ocean for this dude.he would build arenas for this dude #even if this dude will end half the world.even if this dude wields the power and the obligation to eradicate him at any second.#even if this dude is going to throw himself into harms way for his own comrades.even if this dude is just going to sacrifice himself.#one way or another one shall die for the other.these self-sacrificial bastards click so well with eachother!!#chip believes his body is best used to pave roads and gill believes his body is destined to pave prosperity.WHATEVER!!#i really love their dynamic!! they care for eachother so much!in MY heart tho. the icing on the cake here is the fantasy that chip is #just a bit more In Love w gillion than he realizes. like this powerful fish guy is HOT and PRETTY and KIND and FUNNY and LOYAL and STRONG #but gillion would never rly feel that same sort of attraction towards chip. its just not rly his thing. aroace as fuck man.#thats how it is in MY little heart atleast. and i sit here and play w my touys in my brain n i explore my silly lil one sided fish y chips.

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deoidesign · 11 days

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something that makes me sad is when people tell me the healthy communication in my writing is "unrealistic."

like guys this is how me and my partner talk with eachother... I'm writing from personal experience...

#like it's sad both on the front of 'dehumanizing my real life'#but also on the front of 'you deserve to have healthy communication in your life'#like if you think this is unrealistic it means more than likely you havent experienced someone being patient and understanding with you #and that makes me very very sad #I'm sorry #also it's just rude to tell me my writing is unrealistic LOL like hey #real people talk all kinds of ways. shut up #I've been told it's also in part cause they always understand their own feelings when theyre talking #but I'm like...#theyre like mid 30-early 40 and theyre immortal and theyre going through a lot of shit #I feel like theyve thought about it a lot #also the comic takes place over the course of a year so far #we're seeing the big moments and the fun mysteries #so #its about grown men who love eachother #sorry that they think about what they want to say before they say it #also as if adam isnt constantly wrong and steve isnt constantly pushing shit down #he's only JUST RECENTLY starting to share his emotions as they come up #instead of pretending theyre not there and letting things boil over #I think people just THINK theyre communicating way too clearly because their partner #who loves them #is listening and responding with kindness #like..#idk I have a lot of thoughts about this #would LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE for this to spark a discussion #and especially for it to cause people to reread a little more critically #and perhaps even introspect on their own ideas of communication standards #I've been with my partner for 10 years. this is how we talk to eachother

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psychedelic-ink · 5 months

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man living with toxic relatives really is the worst, you come home and you just deal with more bullshit when you should be relaxing

#sil talks.🎤#your girl is losing her mind #everything i do is wrong #ive been told i might be 18 but i have an experience of a highschooler #even tho my aunt literally does not know what i did in turkey and believe me it ain't highschooler lever #and when I ask her something it's always why are you asking me google it #like maam arent you supposed to be this super experienced 50 year old why are you bitching at me when I ask question about a country i just #moved to 2 months ago #like god damnit #i dont know how much of this i can take #and im not even mnetioning her constantly saying “the new generation doesn't want to do anything”#the new generation doesnt know how to use google #the new generation doesn want to work #the future of coorparate america is screwed because the new generation doesn't know how to do anything #WHO RAISED THAT NEW GENERATION?????#YOU #YOU DID #SO STFU #her kids literally don't know how to communicate with other people and when i do something I'm constantly in the wrong lmao #mind you she knows my manager loved me and I'm getting a raise this week #and after i told her she said i have experience of a highschooler and I'm not ready for new york #well i sure as hell ain't gonna be ready for it living with you #god i hate it #ah and also me needing to hide my hips #delete later

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yuridovewing · 3 months

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As a fellow Dovewing lover, it's frustrating how the fandom watered her down into a whiny brat who never cared about Ivypool. I mean, seriously? Not only did Dovewing care about her sister (reacting in horror when Lionblaze, her own mentor and Jayfeather are willing to potentially sacrifice Ivypool's safety by employing her as her spy instead of trying to get her out of the Dark Forest's clutches, hiding a thorn in her nest to cover for her scarring from her training).

Heck, even the scene where she tries to feed Ivypool her catch during a hunting patrol was demonized because 'she was trying to make Ivypool break the code like SHE does, as if it doesn't matter' and because she got upset when Ivypool started arguing with her! But you guys said she didn't care, right? Plus, people act like being forced into a prophecy is something you should be grateful for, as if it didn't irreparably change her close relationship with her sister? As if Lionblaze and Jayfeather didn't still keep her out of the loop (and for all the fussing they made about keeping it a secret, Lionblaze confesses his power to Cinderheart and Jayfeather doesn't even care).

Meanwhile Nightheart is angry he isn't orange and hates his mom for being exiled and the whole world has to stop for him. 🤪 And Bramblestar is simply so tortured by having an evil father, the only choice is to train with him and his evil half-brother and hide this from his wife! (But remember, it's bad when that witch Squirrelflight hides the parentage of the three from him, even when Blackstar and Leopardstar were still around after being complicit in the torture and killing of halfclan cats.) Why are these male characters sympathized with, even when they actively harm people (Nightheart forcing himself into Sunbeam's life by lying to everyone about being her mate without even asking her if she would be fine with that beforehand), Bramblestar (we all know what he does), but when Dovewing or any other female character is upset, people freak out and call them whiny brats or abusive for (checks notes) asking her partner if he loves her anymore after they argued multiple times in a book. Really makes you think! (Sorry this is so long, you just have based opinions!)

dovewing being characterized as this flighty airheaded vain popular girl stereotype in fanon is like. one of those biggest "we didnt actually read the books" things in the fandom. like theres so much fanart where shes grinning and giggling over the prophecy and shes besties with the trio and shes got preferential treatment, and then in the actual books shes basically the autistic kid no one actually likes. people really, REALLY overexaggerate that one scene where she snaps at ivypaw and brags. (and i dont wanna shit on amvs but i am forever side eying how the animation community handled dove back in the day. more than one person animated her getting murdered. normal.)

i do think its gotten better recently at least. but wow does it feel like at least one person on the writing team has a bone to pick

(also awww thank you <3 no need to be sorry i love getting stuff in my inbox)

#it does also feel so insidious to me just how long the bramblesquirrel conflict was painted as ''equally kind of wrong''#the ppl who put words in squilfs mouth sometimes which. btw ill get to that when i read the book #and tbf part of it is that sometimes abuse isnt as easy to spot if youre primed to the mainstream version of it #like. bramble isnt a born evil wifebeater everyone can see coming from a mile away. hes a complex guy with his own insecurities #and his own goals and people he openly cares about. and even in some fanon stuff i see ppl kinda erase that part of him #(which i wont pretend im above- ive been trying to walk that line myself)#and that doesnt match how abusers are usually percieved by the public. or in this very series.#like. the main excuse for clear sky is literally ''hes sad his sister died and tried to save her! no one changes THAT much''#anyone can be an abuser. you could be an abuser. i could be an abuser. that doesnt mean that we ARE but we are capable of it #and the thing that catches ppl off guard is that abusers are really good at hiding who they are and theyre often charming #i often hear this account of abuse that goes something like ''my parent abused me but no one believed me bc theyre nice in public''#you dont know whats going on behind closed doors. and ik this is about funny kitties at the end of the day but its quite telling #so... yeah bramble has his nice moments. hes got his GREAT moments even. i love his relationship with his mom for example #but those moments dont mean that hes not capable of being worse. of being a monster to his loved ones #its why squilf keeps getting sucked back in. hes not a one dimensional asshole. hes capable of being kind to her.#and thats what makes his disgusting moments hit so much harder #wow ok i got off topic in the tags but yknow. idk i got feelings abt this matter as someone who's experienced toxic relationships

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