#allina writes

[roosteraloha]

in sickness

jake seresin x reader

wc - 3k

warnings - talks of poor mental health, not looking after yourself, chronic pain discussions, a lot of angst but also a lot of fluff !!

disclaimer - ANY BLANK/AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED!! I also DO NOT give permission for any of my works to be copied, shared, compiled, translated or posted onto other sites!!

a/n - I hope this fic can provide you a bit comfort, whether you experience chronic pain or not!! life is terrible right now and this is my little bit of comfort while I get through this flare up. pls always take care of yourselves <3

comments & reblogs are greatly appreciated!!

You had been feeling off for a while. You couldn’t pinpoint exactly when this feeling started, it just did. And it sucked. Usually a bright and hard working individual, you now felt more like a shell of who you used to be - more than you ever had before.

With no family around, this was the year you’d truly be alone for the holiday season. A welcome change to the fake smile you’d plaster on, anything to avoid more for your family to pick you apart for. Anything to avoid being seen as the family failure even more.

Working part time as a barista while you continued your studies at a new campus, began merely as a way to pay rent and pay the remaining tuition, which failed to be covered by your scholarships. Now, your work was a chance to escape both from your family issues and your school work, a chance to just be.

A few months into living in San Diego, you’d developed a much needed routine; classes in the day, serving regulars at the little café, then studying more when you got home.

There was one regular at the café that always made your smile a bit brighter, a real smile, rather than the fake customer service one that you had perfected.

A tall, blonde aviator.

He arrived like clockwork every single day, ordered the same drink and pastry each day, and something you noticed the longer you worked there, only gave his signature wink and drawl of “Thanks darlin’” to you. A fact that gave you a flutter of butterflies each time he walked through the door.

It had taken you a few months to work up the courage to accept his invitation of a date, ironically he insisted on just going for a coffee (or any drink you'd prefer, as he insisted), which then progressed to him regularly joining you at the café on your late shifts. Jake was the absolute definition of a gentleman, opening and holding doors for you, insisting on walking you home, saying “I couldn’t sleep not knowing if you got home safe darlin’”.

It made your heart flutter to have the attention of such a man. You’d imagined that this type of love would only ever exist in cheesy romance books, but Jake exceeded even those standards and expectations.

Having Jake in your life was a blessing. One that you would never take for granted. Even on your bad days.

It wasn’t that you were intentionally ignoring Jake, it was more the fact that you instinctively knew that as soon as you let him get a proper answer from you, he’d instantly know something was wrong and immediately try and fix it. Something your younger self would crave, but now, you couldn’t find it in you to care. Going from class to class, then to work, picking up extra shifts just to occupy your mind, leaving earlier and earlier, coming home later and later.

It was a good thing you lived alone and hadn’t caved to Jake’s repeated attempts to get you to move in with him, which realistically would be the best idea both for your commute and your relationship, not to mention that you slept over at his place almost daily. However, this flare up of poor moods and anxiety, was clouding your logical view, and you refused each and every plea from your loving boyfriend. You knew he was only looking out for you, but you couldn’t help the irritation that prickled up stronger with each invitation. The insinuation that you couldn’t look after yourself, that you needed someone to take care of you. A snappy comment lodged in your throat, but finding yourself too detached to even voice it.

Living alone provided you with the much needed sanctuary where you could just be. Somewhere you didn’t need to worry about someone seeing just how badly you were suffering on a day to day basis. You knew deep down, that living with Jake would better for you both, but you had particularly stubborn streak that had developed from the constant dismissal of your feeling from your family. Jake, you knew would never be like them, he was far too observant to not notice, and far too caring to let you suffer alone.

It wasn’t until Jake cornered you on your mandatory day off that he finally found the perfect opportunity to get to the bottom of your sudden emotional polarity. He’d cleared the leave with Cyclone, citing a hurried mention of a ‘family emergency’, which to Jake this was, and consequently receiving the next week off without any further explanation.

Knowing your penchant for burying any negative feelings, and faking your way through your days off which aligned with his in the past, Jake followed his normal morning routine. An early wake up call, one which to his growing concern, you were seemingly awake before, a bland breakfast of toast and coffee, then heading to his truck, backing out his truck, then instead of the usual commute to base, Jake parked at the end of the street and waited an hour before heading back.

Jake was greeted by a silent home. If he didn’t know better, he’d think that there was nobody home, but your keys were still by the door, your shoes messily stacked by the coat hooks, everything in the exact place as when he left.

Frowning, he makes his way through the house, scanning every room for any signs that you had moved from your curled position on the bed, the one you hadn’t moved from since you got home the night before.

There was a small crack in the paint of Jake’s bedroom wall.

A minute crack really.

Just to the right of the bedroom door, creeping up from the baseboards. Barely noticeable to anyone else, but you have been so fixated on it, unable to tear your gaze away from it. A quick lick of paint, even one of those tester rollers that Jake kept in his toolbox would do it. But yet again, you couldn’t find it in you to care.

Huffing at nothing in particular, you blink slowly, your eyes drying out from your blank, unwavering stare, the blood vessels shot around your irises, irritated more with each blink.

Jake slowly pushes the bedroom door open, having paused to watch your empty stare, growing more concerned with each passing minute. On your best days, you weren’t known to be the most bubbly and social person, but still made the effort anyway. Now? Now Jake was halfway to calling in reinforcements, in whatever way he could to try and get through to you, even if you hated him afterwards.

His slow pace to your side was an effort to not startle you, he needn’t have worried, you didn’t even flinch, like you normally did, when he pressed a gentle kiss to your exposed shoulder.

Having come from a very complex family, with a concerning lack of physical contact, you often found yourself flinching away from people, getting overwhelmed when people refused to give you space, getting frustrated with your feelings, unable to communicate your desires and needs for physical interaction, romantic or platonic. It was something that Jake had easily picked up on, quickly learning your tells, learning exactly what you craved, without you having to explicitly say anything at all.

Sighing, Jake decided to take a risk, you have been known to lash out in the past, whenever you haven’t been warned about incoming physical contact. Exhaling slowly, praying to whatever he could, Jake slid his hand gently up your arm, getting you used to his touch before pulling you up into a sitting position, crouching before you, directly in your eye line.

Jake nudged you gently, trying to get a response from you. startling from the movement, your gaze darts from the paint crack to Jake’s hand on your knee. Goosebumps erupt across your arms as you focus on the sensation of his large, warm hand on your skin. Feeling your muscles tense under his hand, he rubs his thumb in soothing circles, trying to placate your instinct to flinch away.

Breath hitching in your throat, you instinctively jolt backwards, away from Jake. He exhales loudly, disappointed and slightly hurt that you still have this reaction to him after all this time. Jake has always been the perfect boyfriend, always there to be supportive, even when you often feel that you don’t deserve it.

Having zoned back into reality, you refuse to make eye contact with Jake, instead keeping him in your periphery as you cautiously shuffle back towards him. Jake raises an eyebrow at the sudden change, it was highly unusual for you to even try and instigate physical proximity, where this would normally be a good thing, today, it added to his growing concern that you were not okay. Far from it.

Jake tried and failed to catch your eye line, eyes darting away from him with each attempt. Deciding on a different approach, Jake knelt from his crouched position, “Darlin’ when was the last time you ate?” A halfhearted shrug was the only response, while an improvement, Jake’s heart ached knowing you needed his help and support desperately, but knew you were too nervous and stubborn to ask on a good day, that today he stood no chance of getting a response from you.

Feeling a wave of confidence, you flicked your eyes over to Jake, scanning his features, taking in his clear concern and worry about you. Heart pounding in your chest, you anxiously clench your hand tightly into a fist a few times, before slowly reaching your hand out to Jake, quickly retracting it as you begin to overthink it.

Brows furrowed, Jake moves to sit beside you, leaving a space between you, softly smiling in encouragement as your eyes follow his movements and then slowly turn your body to face him.

“What do you need from me right now?” His voice quiet, yet steady and comforting. Another weak shrug. Registering the increasing frustration in Jake’s expression, you shakily reach out for his hand, intertwining your fingers and taking in all the calluses and faint scars on his hand, finding the simple contact immediately calming, feeling bold enough to express your want.

A gentle tug on his hand, your hand slowing moving up his arm, then round his waist, climbing slowing and shakily into his lap, curling up his strong embrace, nuzzling your head into his chest. Jake stayed still in disbelief, this was everything he dreamed you’d one day be comfortable to ask for, never mind instigate of your own will. Smiling to himself in pride, he readjusts his position on the edge of his bed, a soothing hand in your hair, scratching lightly at your scalp, something that Jake had noticed eaisly helped you relax. After a few moments your muscles slowly began to relax and eyes growing heavy.

The rapid succession of sneezes and soft whimpers that Jake woke to in the afternoon, alerted him to the root cause of your recent lack of responsiveness. A soft grumble was followed by you curling back into Jake’s side, nuzzling into his warmth, finding comfort from him wherever you could.

In the entire span of your relationship, Jake can only recall you being sick a handful of times. Perhaps something to do with your insistence of maintaining your personal space Jake has always thought, but you sick was an experience, one that Jake hated. Thinking back over the past few weeks, the warning signs that you were getting sick, were now glaringly obvious and Jake was mentally kicking himself for not paying close enough attention.

Gathering the various medicines from his bathroom, ones that he had previously taken note of that seemed to help ease your symptoms the best. Jake sets the various bottles and packets on the bedside table, picking one at random to try and convince you to take.

Narrowing your bloodshot eyes at Jake, you shake your head vehemently, an action you quickly regret. Clutching at your head in agony, you whimper quietly, shifting back towards Jake, burying your head in the crook of his neck and clinging to him like a lifeline.

Gently coaxing you out from your comfortable position, Jake’s heart broke knowing he’s asking you to do the opposite of everything you’d been working on together. Eyes glassy with unshed tears, you try to cling to the comfort of his embrace, confused as to why Jake was forcing you away from him. Unable to think logically in your pained state, you took this as a rejection, promptly turning away from Jake, putting as much distance between you both as his king sized bed allowed.

A pill is placed firmly in your hand, a chance to take it yourself, one you instantly refused, tossing the pill over your shoulder, hopefully somewhere in Jake’s direction, you couldn’t really find it in you to care.

A startled yelp leaves your lips as you’re manhandled by Jake, your back now resting against his chest, a firm arm across your waist, keeping you close in his hold. You were too weak to fight him anyway, but Jake took the precaution anyway.

He knows you.

Much to your chagrin, another pill is placed in the palm of your hand. Craning your neck to see Jake’s motives, you’re annoyed to see a blank expression, all he does is gesture to the pill in your hand, and look away from you completely.

Having suffered from chronic pain for years, you despise each pill you have to take, from many years of doctors just giving you pill after pill without listening to your concerns. Now you find yourself avoiding doctors, or any medication wherever you can. Jake knew this, it was something discussed early on in your relationship, not wanting him to feel ignored when you inevitably had a flare up and consequently spent the next week or two in bed recovering, which is why you feel so hurt when he keeps insisting on you taking this medication.

When your equally blank stare at Jake goes on too long, he sighs heavily, pulling you back with him as he leans back against the headboard. Feeling the rumble of his low voice behind you had a surprisingly soothing effect, “Darlin’. Please just let me take care of you.”

When that didn’t produce a response, “C’mon darlin’, it’s breaking my heart to see you in so much pain.”

Turning in his hold, cupping his cheek with your hand momentarily, causing him to flinch at how cold you felt, slowly sitting, reaching for the pill and quickly swallowing the bitterness with the glass of water that jake insisted you keep by the bed whenever you’d stay over. Several kisses are pressed across your hairline and forehead, soft mumblings of praise continue as you settle back in his arms.

“I know how much you hate taking them, but you have to in order to get better darlin’.” Scoffing in disapproval, and resentment of your boyfriend yet again being right, results in Jake wrapping his arms even tighter around you, careful of any known sensitive areas, pressing more gentle kisses to the top of your head.

“Before you get too comfortable, we’ve got to get you something to eat. God knows when you last ate a proper meal.”

You swallowed cautiously, “That time you cooked your grandmother’s recipe.”

Silence.

You felt him tense behind you, sitting up straighter, gentle fingers at your chin in an effort for you to look at him.

“Sweetheart… That was almost a week ago.”

Shrugging, you try a nonchalant approach, knowing Jake would not like the answer, “I eat stuff at the café and in between classes when I can. I just don’t have time to cook a full meal anymore Jake.”

Exasperated, Jake pulls you to stand, wrapping a blanket around your shoulders, then taking your hand gently and leading downstairs to the kitchen. He busies himself, after seating you on the counter, checking cupboards and the fridge to see what he could pull together for you both. Settling on something basic, he gets to cooking, something he enjoys. Not that Jake liked to openly share this with his fellow aviators, in case of any ribbing and teasing, yet another reason he had been overly cautious as to not introduce you to the group already.

The delectable scents wafting in your direction results in several rumbles from your stomach, a light blush stains your cheeks when Jake glanced in your direction with a teasing smile. Shrugging playfully in response brings a bright grin to Jake’s face, the one that always has you smiling along with him, because how could you be sad when he looked at you like that, with that much love in his eyes just for you?

One lovingly home cooked meal later, you’re yet again tucked into Jake’s side in his bed, considerably more relaxed than when Jake left in the morning. With the self-reflection that you’d both started to keep your relationship healthy, you knew you weren’t the best at looking after yourself, which only got worse during a flare up or sickness. Jake however, was your constant. A strong caring and protective streak, you would never suffer alone again.

“I missed this. I missed you. Can we stay like this for just a bit longer?” You murmur quietly into his chest, arms tightening around his waist.

“Of course darlin’,” Jake places a soft kiss on the crown of your head.

“You don’t even need to ask.”

While there were some days that you felt so isolated and a burden, those days were notably fewer now that you had Jake in your life.

You just didn’t know that Jake vowed from the day you confessed your struggles that he would always be there to look after you.

In sickness and in health.

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#allina writes #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake seresin x reader #hangman x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #jake hangman seresin #hangman x you #jake seresin fic #top gun maverick fic #tgm fanfiction

[quoteoftheweekblog]

RACHEL RHYS - 'MURDER UNDER THE TUSCAN SUN' (FIRST PUBLISHED 2023)

First sentance:

'We have to walk the last part of the hill.' (Rhys, 2023, p.1).

On D.H. and Frieda Lawrence:

' ... an English writer called Duncan Fletcher and his "frightful" German wife, Klara, who had rented a house a few miles away - "an utter hovel" - in which he was writing a book rumoured to be "total filth" ... ' (Rhys, 2023, p.44).

' "I heard he's writing the filthiest book ... No publisher will touch it with a barge pole, apparently, I cannot wait to read it." ' (Rhys, 2023, p.132).

' ... the Fletchers - the celebrated writer of filth and his "frightful" wife ... ' (Rhys, 2023, p.146).

On literature:

'On the first day, I asked if he'd like me to read from a copy of "Bleak House" I'd found on the library shelves. "Don't you think I've suffered enough?" he asked.' (Rhys, 2023, p.45). ' ... I sat outside on the front steps of the castle, reading with Nora from a copy of "Huckleberry Finn" I'd found in the library, not realizing until Allina told me tht its author, Mark Twain, had been a regular visitor to this very region and had even lived for a short while in one of the neighbouring villas.' (Rhys, 2023, p.89). ' ... I was reading to him from a disturbing novel called "A Passage to India".' (Rhys, 2023, p.115). 'I was reading to William from a collection of comic stories by P.G. Wodehouse. In recent days, we had come to an unspoken agreement to avoid anything too downbeat or tense and stick to books that were gentle or amusing.' (Rhys, 2023, p.287).

On life:

' " ... a person can learn everything they need to know about life from studying ant colonies." ' (Rhys, 2023, p.50). ' "I eat a great quantity of raw vegetables to keep up my strength." ' (Rhys, 2023, p.161).

' "Everyone should go to at least one party a month ... " ' (Rhys, 2023, pp.176-7).

On the Summer Exhibition:

' "I remember once, when Millie was young, taking her to see the Summer Exhibition at the Royal Academy and her coming straight home and doing a drawing and insisting we go back there to h ang it with the others." ' (Rhys, 2023, p.83).

On art:

' "Art isn't just pretty flowers and the same boring religious scenes ... " ' (Rhys, 2023, p.148).

REFERENCE

Rhys, R. (2023 'Murder under the Tuscan sun'. Amazon.com [E-book]. Available at: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Murder-Under-Tuscan-Sun-tradition-ebook/dp/B0B9G2TVCF/ref=sr_1_3?qid=1695558904&refinements=p_27%3ARachel+Rhys&s=digital-text&sr=1-3 (Accessed 27 August 2023).

[sounmashnews]

[ad_1] MINNEAPOLIS -- More than 130 psychological well being staff at Allina Health might be again on the picket line Tuesday for the second day of their three-day strike for truthful contracts. This comes as M Heath Fairview reached a tentative deal after a marathon 12 hours of negotiations Monday night time with its psychological well being staff, stopping tons of from strolling off the job. The new contract is for 1.5 years and contains an instantaneous 6% wage enhance, with an added 2.75% in March for all staff. There's additionally elevated paid day without work and new initiatives to deal with staffing issues. While it nonetheless must be voted on, union leaders are proud of the deal, noting that is the most important single-year wage enhance the well being system has provided in years. Union leaders representing Allina Health staff stated they're at a standstill with their negotiations. "We are here because we are fed up with the greed at Allina Health, where Allina Health has said they're going to put profits before patients and before our livelihood and our safety," stated Jamie Gulley, president of SEIU Healthcare Minnesota. "We're sick of it." Mental well being staff at each M Health and Allina Health methods went on strike again in May. They have been presupposed to go on strike collectively once more this time till a brand new deal was reached at M Health. Allina staff stated they hope it serves as motivation of their contract negotiations. "We've seen this week that these large corporate health care companies can make progress towards an agreement as you've seen over at the folks with M Health but unfortunately Allina is choosing not to pay us the same respect," stated Stephanie Stark, a senior psychological well being coordinator at Allina Health. Allina Health leaders despatched us a press release saying partially, "While we have reached agreement with the union on most non-economic issues, including many workplace safety items, the union continues to push for wage and benefit increases that are unrealistic and unsustainable at a time when Minnesota health systems are facing significant financial challenges." Allina psychological well being staff might be exterior Allina Unity Hospital in Fridley for the second day of the three-day strike, which begins at 10 a.m. Tuesday. Pauleen Le Pauleen is a journalist with a ardour for telling tales. Nothing makes her happier than speaking to odd extraordinary folks, and utilizing stunning photos and stable writing to share their superb tales with the world. [ad_2] Source link

[boybff]

Been thinking a lot about writing characters with chronic pain. Mostly inspired by how much zukka fic I've been reading. I wanted to compile some ideas I had about writing characters with chronic pain. These are all the thoughts of a singular disabled person with chronic pain!

Below is a pain assessment scale. I liked this table specifically because it provides detailed and measurable categories to each number. I don't fully agree with the definitions of 7+ but probably because I'm nitpicky.

I think this table is a great tool for people without chronic pain to gain a deeper understanding of how to write characters with chronic pain. For me, it is disappointing to read a longer fic about a character whose exclusive "flare up" moments are to romanticize a caregiver dynamic. At best it is an ineffective characterization of chronic pain and at worst it re-enforces the idea that to be cared for people with chronic pain must also be desired.

Don't get me wrong, I love an intimate moment of care taking. However, those moments are made impactful when we have an understanding of a characters individual relationship to their chronic pain. I'm not looking for all fics that include chronic pain to grasp the full scope of ableism (I don't want that either lol). But I am asking why some interpretations of characters with chronic pain allow for them to act perfectly able bodied until there is an opportune inter-personal time for them to have a flare up?

I often see that people hc Sokka as having a long term leg injury resulting from his break during Sozin's Comet (which I too hc). However, in many fics that include this hc he doesn't utilize a cane even when his pain is severe. That could be an interesting character choice, as many people with chronic pain deal with internalized ableism, but often it is left uninvestigated.

What I value about this scale is that it is providing an assessment tool that does not dictate a specific response. I've spent many days at a 6 while still having to go to work. My sentences were sticky and hard to piece together and my body felt like it could use a lot of WD-40. So why was I at work? A ton of reasons! Money to live, spending most of my days during that part of my life at a 6, needing to get out of my room for my mental sanity even if it affected my physical wellbeing, pure disabled stubbornness, etc. On other days at a 6 catch me in the fetal position in my room with the lights off!

Most of my loved ones with chronic pain and I consider a decent day a 1-5 and we probably couldn't tell you the last time we were at a 0. Sometimes (if we are very lucky) we get to have long stretches of decent days and other times we are expected to continue our regular responsibilities when we haven't been below a 6 in weeks.

To close this long ramble here are some questions that might guide you to expanding on a character experiencing chronic pain. What does a low pain day look like for this character? What does a high pain day look like? How do they feel about people noticing their pain or offering support? What access tools do they use and what is their relationship to them? What is their individual relationship to their chronic pain and what has informed that?

Well wishes to you in your writing and I look forward to reading your work. Image description below cut.

[Image Description: A table titled Allina Health Pain Assessment Scale. There are two columns, the one on the left is numbers 1 through 10. The right column is corresponding experiences associated with each level of pain.]

0 means no pain

1 through 3 is mild pain. Pain doesn't interfere with your regular activities.

1. You may barely notice the pain

2. You may feel some twinges of pain

3. You may notice the pain but you can tolerate it.

4 through 6 is moderate pain. Pain may interfere with your regular activities.

4. You can ignore the pain at times.

5. You can't ignore the pain but you can still work through some activities.

6. Pain makes it hard to concentrate.

7 through 9 is severe pain.

7. Pain distracts you and limits your ability to sleep.

8. Pain is so intense that you have trouble talking.

9. Pain is so bad that you can't do any of your regular activities, including talking or sleeping.

10 is the worst pain you can imagine.

#this post is also a love letter to writers who write characters with chronic pain so wellllll #chronic pain sokka #atla headcanons #sokka x zuko #disabled zukka #atla fic #zukka #disabled zuko #disabled sokka #writing reference #gaang #atla fanfic #gay atla #chronic pain zuko #my post

[https-rainbumble]

Allina Windischmann // Dream

face claim · danielle campbell

abilities · dream walking

fic · swindler of nightmares

love interest · cisco ramon

Anita Stilinović

face claim · chloe bridges

abilities · none

fic · bane of desire

love interest · cisco ramon

Colette Dupuy

face claim · emma dumont

abilities · energy manipulation

fic · root of nightmares

love interest · barry allen

Eira Snow // Hailstorm

face claim · minka kelly

abilities · cryokinesis

fic · appearance of the underground

love interest · barry allen

Hanna O'Dineen

face claim · erin moriarty

abilities · healing

fic · exit strategy

love interest · barry allen

Iva Weimann

face claim · stella maeve

abilities · witchcraft

fic · witches of the eclipse

love interest · barry allen

Paige Porter

face claim · giorgia whigham

abilities · power mimicry

fic · extractions

love interest · barry allen

Raya Renyold

face claim · sophie turner

abilities · cosmic manipulation

fic · the aftermath

love interest · barry allen

Sienna Kennedy

face claim · sadie soverall

abilities · lighting manipulation

fic · some people (just want to watch the world burn)

love interest · cisco ramon

Tia Hecke

face claim · amanda seyfried

abilities · none

fic · monsters and men

love interest · cisco ramon

Varga Tünde

face claim · danielle rose russell

abilities · magic

fic · tell me a story about the past (and write one for our future)

love interest · barry allen

Viviana Pliego

face claim · aimee garcia

abilities · none

fic · somethings can't be outrun

love interest · barry allen

Zahra West

face claim · vanessa morgan

abilities · future sight

fic · forsaking the future

love interest · cisco ramon

Zelda Schmidt

face claim · kacey rohl

abilities · memory surfing

fic · the falling out

love interest · cisco ramon + caitlin snow

Zuri Keegan

face claim · zoë kravitz

abilities · xenoglossy [ability to speak a language without having ever learned it before]

fic · not always fast enough

love interest · barry allen [+ cisco ramon [?]

Temperance Fitzlewis

face claim · victoria pedretti

abilities · pathokinesis [able to sense and control emotions]

fic · all over again

love interest · caitlin snow/frost

Love Wyard

face claim · rachel mcadams

abilities · none

fic · highschool sweetness

love interest · barry allen

Margerie Berwyk

face claim · emma stone

abilities · none

fic · memory of the city

love interest · cisco ramon

Sidney Faylare

face claim · halston sage

abilities · mind reading

fic · secrets left unsaid

love interest · barry allen

Betella Dryden

face claim · hailee steinfeld

abilities · lie detection

fic · control

love interest · tbd

[serpenteve]

us critiquing the sab books: talk about how allina in the books makes for an unsatisfactory protagonist with an unsatisfactory arc and how the story's treatment of her is also a bit sexist AND her being a passive protagonist while the men around her seem to be driving the plot is annoying.

antis: YOU'RE A SEXIST AND A MISOGYNIST FOR NOT WORSHIPPING ALINA

(tbh that word vomit ask calling alina critiques sexist -- there's been similar word vomit asks that sound more of a rambling rant than an actual ask across a bunch of darklina/darkling blogs and i'm pretty sure it's all the same person but lol)

I just made a post today on how the Discourse™ about the sexist ending of Ruin & Rising has literally come full circle with the antis claiming any critique about the sexist ending is itself sexist ☠️

Honestly, I don't even think these are good faith arguments. From my point of view, it sounds like some antis are threatened and insecure that their canon ship isn't as popular and see any critique about the canon as a personal attack on them.

Like this whole new take that "Ackshully, Darklina shippers are the ~real~ sexists because they hate stay-at-home moms and ship Alina with her abuser!!!11" is a response to a strawman opinion no one is even making.

No one is shitting on stay-at-home moms, housewives, or women who choose to take on more traditional roles. What we are critiquing is why the author chose to write and frame her story the way she did. By writing Alina's story the way she did, she has now participated in a long ancient history in which not only is female power repeatedly demonized but the heroine is forced to give up her power/career/ambition/whatever for the sake of a man and his desires.

To add to that, the idea that "women should be able to stay at home" is also not a particularly timely take either considering that being a stay-at-home wife or mother is no longer a choice, but rather a luxury. When I was a kid, my parents supported a mortgage, car payments, and three whole kids on one (1) salary. That's fucking impossible today.

Which, ironically, is exactly the kind of ending Alina gets. Through her connections with Nikolai and friends in high places, she is able to afford to buy Keramzin and its surrounding lands and take care of the orphans there while the majority of Ravka is stuck working until death and would have gladly given an arm and a kidney to have a fraction of the kind of power Alina had at her peak.

#viv answers #contains excessive amounts of sodium

[trapped-inadystopianovel]

What do your characters do when they're stressed?

Cicely- She doesn’t handle stress well. She’s the type that doesn’t realize she’s getting stressed out until she’s so stressed out that she’s in tears. She’ll then just sit there crying for a bit and when she’s done she’ll go back to what she’s doing. 

Galib-  This man can handle a lot but when he does get he likes to just go in his tent, read and smoke a joint.

Sumayl- He likes going into the tavern getting something to drink, flirt with the local ladies, sometimes he’ll join Galib in smoking but very rarely.

Alina- She’s the person that gets pissed off by every little thing when she’s stressed so everyone just leaves her alone she’s like that and since no one what to be around her, she’ll go for a walk and maybe do some target practice with some throwing knives.

Litwin- He’ll fuck or fight depending on the time of day.

 Padma- She may seem like she would be like her husband Litwin and Allina in the sense that she will just fight some but really she just sits in her room embroidering.

Aza- She’ll make some tea, find her twin Ab and talk with him about stuff for a minute before sitting back on closing her eyes and resting.

Ab- He works through his stress! Galib told him an important letter needs to get written perfect and sent to all of their allies by the end of the day; Ab grabs some food and tells his sister to bring him some tea. Got to inform families that they lost a family member in a battle; he’ll write those letters until every single one is done, counted for and sent out. 

[mcshep-everyday]

Chapters: 35/35 Fandom: Stargate Atlantis Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Rodney McKay/John Sheppard Characters: John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Teyla Emmagan, Aiden Ford, Elizabeth Weir, Lyle Holland, Marshall Sumner, Other Characters Mentioned, Original Non-Human Character(s), Stackhouse (Stargate Atlantis), Markham (Stargate Atlantis), Carson Beckett, Original Characters, Bates (Stargate Atlantis), daemons - Character, Acastus Kolya, Chaya Sar, Allina (Stargate Atlantis), Dillon Everett, Steven Caldwell, Radek Zelenka, Patrick Sheppard, Dave Sheppard, John Sheppard's Mother, Hank Landry, Jack O'Neill, Sam Carter Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Telepathic Bond, Identity Issues, Daemons, spirituality, Ancients, life and death, what happens when the Daemon dies before the human?, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Flying, Minor Character Death, Cultural Differences, Sentient Atlantis, Athosians, Loneliness (except not really), Cultural Taboos, (I'm exploring a new writing style), Psychological Torture, incomplete sentences, Ascension, Run-On Sentences, Season/Series 01, Protective John Sheppard, Zero Point Modules, I'm drawing on these canon episodes but scrambling their order and context, Brief mentions of blood/gore, Non-Linear Narrative, Wraith, Survivor Guilt, Souls, Temporary Character Death, this fic is rapidly turning out much more complicated than i'd meant, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF John Sheppard, Atlantis team loyalty, Protective Atlantis, Marines, Team as Family, First Kiss, Don't Ask Don't Tell, First Time, Angst with a Happy Ending Series: Part 1 of the ghost and the raven Summary:

In a world where everyone has a Daemon, John Sheppard is born without one. (except it is much more complicated than that)

#mcshep #john sheppard #rodney mckay #fic rec

[maxwellyjordan]

Tuesday round-up

This morning the justices will return from a four-week break to hear oral argument in Return Mail Inc. v. United States Postal Service, in which they will consider whether the federal government can challenge patents under the America Invents Act. Ronald Mann previewed the case for this blog. Garion Liberti and Tayler Woelcke have a preview at Cornell Law School’s Legal Information Institute. Subscript Law offers a graphic explainer for the case. First Mondays (podcast) previews both of this week’s oral arguments.

At The Economist’s Espresso blog, Steven Mazie writes that “[a]nxiety among Democrats should ease this morning when Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg returns to her place on the bench after cancer treatment.” For The New York Times, Adam Liptak reports that Ginsburg appeared at the court on Friday for the first time since her surgery in December “to participate in a private conference at which the justices considered adding cases to the court’s docket.”

At that conference on Friday, the court agreed to hear Department of Commerce v. New York, a challenge to the Trump administration’s decision to add a question about citizenship to the 2020 census, with oral argument during the second week in April. Amy Howe has this blog’s coverage, which first appeared at Howe on the Court. For The Wall Street Journal, Brent Kendall and Janet Adamy report that the case will “add[] another chapter to the court’s interaction with Trump administration initiatives affecting immigrants.” Mark Walsh reports at Education Week’s School Law Blog that “the outcome potentially affect[s] the allocation of billions of dollars in federal education funding.” Additional coverage comes from Nina Totenberg for NPR.

In an op-ed for The Hill, Elliot Mincberg maintains that three of Justice Brett Kavanaugh’s recent votes on the court’s “shadow docket,” “cases that are heard on motions to grant a stay or for other immediate relief without oral argument and usually without written opinions by the justices,” “have more than lived up to President Donald Trump’s expectations that [Kavanaugh] will be far to the right on the court, including on crucial issues for the Trump administration.” At The Progressive, Bill Blum agrees that “[i]t hasn’t taken Kavanaugh long to reveal his true ideological colors,” focusing on Kavanaugh’s dissent in June Medical Services v. Gee, in which the justices voted 5-4 to temporarily block a Louisiana law that would require abortion providers to have admitting privileges at nearby hospitals.

In an op-ed for The National Law Journal, Samuel Spital weighs in on the pending cert petition in Tharpe v. Ford, arguing that “[i]n keeping with its duty to eradicate the pernicious effects of racial discrimination in the judicial system, the U.S. Supreme Court must, once again, intervene in Tharpe’s case and prevent the State of Georgia from executing Tharpe before any court has considered the compelling evidence that Tharpe was sentenced to death, at least in part, because he is black.” Additional commentary on the case comes from David Burge in an op-ed for Newsweek and from Wilton Gregory and others at The Atlantic.

Briefly:

At National Review, Alexandra McPhee weighs in on The American Legion v. American Humanist Association, an establishment clause challenge to a World War I memorial shaped like a cross on public property, arguing that “[a]ll of America’s increasingly diverse religious communities will lose out if the Constitution is reinterpreted to prohibit any government recognition or accommodation of religion.” [Disclosure: Goldstein & Russell, P.C., whose attorneys contribute to this blog in various capacities, is counsel on an amicus brief in support of the petitioners in this case.]

At the Washington Independent Review of Books, Kenneth Jost reviews “The Company They Keep: How Partisan Divisions Came to the Supreme Court.”

At The World and Everything in It, Mary Reichard discusses the oral arguments in Thacker v. Tennessee Valley Authority, in which the justices considered whether an implied discretionary function exception bars a negligence claim against the TVA, Azar v. Allina Health Services, which asks whether the Department of Health and Human Services was required to conduct notice-and-comment rulemaking before altering its Medicare hospital-reimbursement formula, and copyright case Fourth Estate Public Benefit Corp. v. Wall-Street.com.

We rely on our readers to send us links for our round-up. If you have or know of a recent (published in the last two or three days) article, post, podcast, or op-ed relating to the Supreme Court that you’d like us to consider for inclusion in the round-up, please send it to roundup [at] scotusblog.com. Thank you!

The post Tuesday round-up appeared first on SCOTUSblog.

from Law https://www.scotusblog.com/2019/02/tuesday-round-up-466/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

#law #justice

[roosteraloha]

infirmarian

jake seresin x reader

wc - approx 7.2k

warnings - angst, general discussion of sickness, description of vomit/throwing up, brief description of panic attacks.

disclaimer - ANY BLANK/AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED!! I also DO NOT give permission for any of my works to be copied, shared, compiled, translated or posted onto other sites!!

a/n - this is wrote itself. being chronically in pain sucks, sorry it took so long to get out, been the longest flare up of my life :(

reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated!!

A few days had passed since Jake had received any communication from you, you’d have your schedule rammed full of new work projects and meetings, not leaving much time for a social life, at least the kind that you longed for. This wasn’t something uncommon, Jake himself had a hectic day to day schedule, and the addition of your new work responsibilities was something that neither of you had enough to fully consider the amount of time that you’d have left to share with each other.

Fresh off an eight week deployment, Jake was eager to spend time with you however he could, swallowing down the bitter taste of disappointment that he came home to you being far busier than you’d let on in your limited communication. With only a few weeks left before you’d get back to your usual schedule, you had gotten to the point of longing for Jake’s company too. Eight weeks having been too long to not be able to hug him and snuggle up to him after another draining and exhausting day.

Jake had been home for close to two weeks when he started to see signs that you weren’t doing too well. You were overworking yourself again, and there were tell-tale signs that you were about to get sick. Something that you would never admit, choosing to deny the facts, even when you’re exhausted and tucked in bed with a fever.

Slipping his key into the lock, Jake frowns. The door is already unlocked. This normally wouldn’t be a cause for concern, but today, Jake hadn’t expected you to be home already. You were meant to be at work, at least that was what you had told him in between many incessant kisses this morning as Jake got himself ready. So he could have got confused, too distracted by the beauty he had in his bed, not that he would ever complain about your company.

Tossing his keys onto the hall table, Jake calls out to you. He has a small smile flickering on his lips, Jake could get used to this. It felt nice to have someone to come home too, it felt right. Wandering down the hall, Jake peers into the living room, face lighting up when he sees you curled up on the couch, typing away on your laptop.

Coming up behind you, he places a soft kiss on the top of your head. You had a rule about Jake coming home after flying, he would reek of jet fuel, and while that had slowly become a comforting part of your life, mainly because it reminded you of him, it was a smell that permeated fabrics. There was one incident with a throw blanket, luckily one you didn’t like, Jake had used it one day after a particularly tough day in training, only for you to pick up the next day and the smell was so strong, it may as well have been a rag for him to use on preflight checks. Weeks had passed and no matter how many times you washed it, the smell remained. Now, it was that Jake would shower before leaving base and then change as soon as he got home.

Quickly changing into some sweatpants, Jake joins on the couch, legs outstretched onto the sectional, an arm loosely thrown around your shoulders to pull you into him. Jake eyebrows furrow when he makes contact with your skin. You normally ran cold, hence the otherwise insane amount of blankets and oversized hoodies that you owned, but your skin was burning under Jake’s touch.

He shifts to get a better look at you, your cheeks are flushed, a light sheen on your forehead, your hair is knotty. All signs that something isn’t right. Jake quickly mentally ran through any important dates in your relationship, then running through any mentions of tensions or meetings at work when he failed to recall missing anything. Pressing his palm to your forehead, Jake’s concern grows, you’re overheated, not quite a fever, probably just dehydrated, which was especially likely considering the fact that you probably hadn’t moved around much since you got up and settled on the couch to work.

You still hadn’t actually looked over at Jake since he got home, too invested in furiously typing away, filling in countless mindless admin forms that your coworkers were too lazy to do. The only acknowledgment that you had given to Jake, was a distracted hum when he asked about your day. To be perfectly honest, you were in a work focused daze. These forms needed to be done by the fast approaching deadline, and not a single one of your coworkers had bothered to even try to follow the new formatting, leaving you to pick up the slack. Not like you already had your plate full with the rest of your role.

Jake leans against the kitchen counter thoughtfully, observing you work in your stressed state. It was obvious that you were overworking yourself, more than usual, and quite frankly, more than your coworkers and managers would acknowledge.

After mentally processing through the potential options to help you, Jake settled on what he is hoping will work. If not, he’d have to pull out more drastic measures, which he’d strongly prefer not to have to do. You’d hate him for it, and honestly, he’s hate himself for letting you get so bad in the first place.

Pushing himself off the counter, Jake approaches you, albeit a bit cautiously, he wasn’t entirely sure how you’d react. You almost seem paler than before, and you’re sniffling intermittently, eyes bloodshot and dry from staring at your computer screen for way too long.

"Sweetheart, please stop. You've done enough work, you need to rest." Jake’s low and quiet tone cuts through your daze, your eyes flickering over to him for the first time since he got home. Sighing in relief, Jake smiles softly at you, which falters when he realises that you’re not exactly looking at him, as much as looking in his direction. But that alone was progress and Jake could work with that.

Gently reaching out, Jake pulls your laptop away from your lap, saving your work quickly, then turning it off and placing it closed on the wooden coffee table. This grabs your attention, eyes darting straight to meet Jake’s concerned gaze. You open your mouth to protest but his stern look has any complaints dying on your tongue. Blinking up at him, it takes you a few moments to realise that Jake had taken your work away, the panic and stress soon taking over your features.

You scramble helplessly towards your laptop, Jake’s grip around your waist pinning you to his side. A frustrated cry rips from your throat, clawing at Jake’s arm, begging him to let you go. “No! No, no, no, no. JAKE NO! I need to finish my work!” Your voice comes out weak and wracked with emotion, mainly frustration and hurt that Jake wasn’t letting you finish what you’d started.

Jake’s response is to curl his arm tighter around you, his other hand coming up to caress the side of your face soothingly. He mummers quietly in your ear, hoping to help calm you down before you got yourself into a worse state, “Darlin’. Darlin’, look at me. You need to rest, trust me.”

There’s a moment where all you can hear is the breathing of you both, processing Jake’s gentle coos. A soft whine escapes your lips, “But…”

Jake’s grip loosens a fraction as he shifts to get a proper look at your face, fixing you with a firm stare, “Stop complaining, sweetheart.”

Huffing, you instantly relax in his hold, snuggling back into his chest, burying your head in the crook of his neck when he pulls you close. Finally having gotten through to you, all the tension leaves Jake’s body. While he still had a long way to go with you, to try and get you to understand it was okay to take breaks, that working yourself until you burn out is no way to go through life.

The sheer exhaustion of the stress you’d been under the past few weeks was definitely catching up to you. Jake kept a soothing touch on the back of your head, holding you close to his chest, a quick look down at you told him you needed this rest more than he initially realised. You could barely keep your eyes open for more than a few seconds at a time, yawning softly at regular intervals, snuggling closer to him every time.

Feeling content with you settled so comfortably on his chest, Jake exhaled deeply, leaning his head back against the sofa. Closing his eyes, Jake’s breath evens out, yes he had a long way to go to get you to rest properly, but this with you looking so peaceful laying on him, well, Jake could get used to this.

Dinner was takeout, Jake being too tired himself to cook and secretly didn’t want to disturb your sleep while he attempted an old Seresin family recipe. Settling on your favourite, Jake only moved to wake you after the food arrived and he’d dished out the portions.

You were still asleep when Jake came back, still curled up on the couch under a fluffy blanket, wearing an old sweatshirt of his. A small smile flickered across his lips, as Jake’s heart swooned at seeing you so peaceful and wearing his clothes, something you’d initially been too insecure to try.

His smile was short lived, you’d barely roused from your slumber while Jake was busy in the kitchen, or while he was doing odd jobs around the house while waiting for the food to be delivered. There were more and more red flags to Jake that there was something more serious going on with you, than simply being overworked.

A small frown of concern lingered on his face when you barely responded when he shook you gently to try and get you to eat something. Then, when you eventually woke fully, you declined the food, pushing the dishes away, choosing to move away from him, curling the opposite direction instead.

Jake, drawing this up to your over-exhaustion for now, just took your plate away, carefully portioning the food into some tupperware, hopeful that you’d be hungry later. Turning back to the couch, he frowns again, you still remained curled tightly away from him.

Displeased and slightly frustrated with your decision, Jake returns to your side, shaking you awake, despite your groans in protest. When you finally open your eyes, the harsh glare you send his way has Jake internally wincing. He hated to see you like this, but deep down he knew this was the only way to get through to you.

“Darlin’…”

He trails off, unsure of what else to say to you. His brows pull in together, forming a deeper frown. You weren’t okay, he just needed you to admit it. Glancing down at your clenched hands above the blanket, he takes note of the slight tremble of your hands, eyes darting up to your face, searching your eyes for any answers.

There’s a glistening to your eyes that wasn’t there before when you finally make eye contact with Jake. You felt the panic building, like an icy hand gripping your chest tightly. Your mind running a million miles a second, unable to pinpoint a single cohesive thought. Tears streaming down your face, gasping to catch your breath. Reaching out a shaky hand, you try and catch Jake’s wrist, desperate for any direct contact with him, seeking his comfort any way you could.

Jake is immediately by your side, pulling you close to his side, “It’s okay sweetheart. You’re okay darlin’.” Your teary eyes focus on his worry stricken face, Jake was blindsided but your sudden emotional reaction, he knew something was wrong, you’d been withdrawn, but he hadn’t expected you to be so quick to break down the minute he pressed you for answers. “Darlin’. What’s going on?”

You shrug, looking away from him, not really knowing why you feel the way you do. Jake sighs heavily, sometimes he knows you better than you knew yourself, “It's okay, you don’t have to tell me now. Just breathe, nice and slowly, okay?” You hum softly, nodding gently against his chest, “I promise you, you don’t have to hide this stuff from me. I’m always gonna be here for you darlin’.”

Smiling softly down at you, Jake presses a soft kiss to the top of your head, pulling you closer to his side, “Not that I don’t love being used as your personal heated pillow darlin’, but I think we’d both be far more comfortable in bed.” You giggle softly, but agree, Jake was a comfortable pillow of lean muscle, but your bed was so soft and comfortable, and with Jake there to hold you close, you couldn’t think of anything better.

“You’re adorable when you’re so sleepy darlin’.” Jake croons softly, brushing loose strands of your hair back behind your ear tenderly. You shrug playfully, with mock offence at his words, “It’s not my fault that you’re so comfortable to lay on Jake!”

Jake tries and fails to keep a straight face, soon joining you in soft laughter, shaking his head at your antics. He much preferred you to be this happier version of yourself than the one that had a panic attack on the sofa after a stressful work week.

You whine wearily when Jake leads you towards the adjoining bathroom rather than getting straight into bed, which you’d much prefer. The sheer exhaustion from the past few weeks had finally caught up to you, you couldn’t help but yawn as Jake lifted you to sit up on the counter, your usual place when you’d get ready together, whether the pair of you were getting ready for the day, or just going to bed.

You huff heavily, annoyed that Jake seems to be taking his sweet time getting around to whatever he was doing, moving to the edge of the counter, ready to just jump down and head to bed yourself. “We’re almost done, love. Just stay a little bit longer.” Jake’s soothing tone, paired with the calming circles he was gently rubbing on your knee, has you shuffling back on the counter, resting your head back tiredly against the cold mirror.

You must’ve started to doze off, as the next thing you know, Jake is stirring you gently, a soft squeeze on your shoulder, and a gentle touch on your cheek. You groan, eyes flickering shut again quickly at the harsh light in the bathroom. “Can we go to bed now?” Your soft whines have Jake chuckling as he moves to pick you up in his arms, cradling you against his chest, smiling contently to himself when you bury your face in his neck, hiding from the bright lights.

“You’re so cute when you’re so tired.” Jake teases as he places you gently onto the bed, wrapping the blanket and sheets around you, before climbing in next to you and doing the same. He hums thoughtfully as he feels you snuggle closely up to his side, tangling your ice cold feet with his own. You prop your chin up on his shoulder, watching your boyfriend who was deep in thought.

“Jake…” Your voice is a quiet whisper, not wanting to startle him from his thoughts, knowing how he could react when startled by others in the past. You only continue when he hums softly in acknowledgement, looking down at you, a soft smile appearing on his face when he takes in your concerned expression. Jake didn’t need you to continue, he could read you like a book on most occasions, especially when you were this sleepy and worn out.

He shakes his head calmly, pressing a loving kiss to your forehead when your concerned frown doesn’t fade. “I promise you that I’m okay darlin’. I’d tell you if I wasn’t, you know I would.” Pursing your lips, you study his face carefully, for any signs that he wasn’t being one hundred percent honest with you about this. Finding no obvious signs of dishonesty, you nod once, kissing his cheek softly and nestling your head back on his chest, inhaling his comforting scent deeply, sighing softly with content.

You feel Jake take a few deep breaths, then tighten his arm around your body, holding you securely against his own. It was something he’d started doing very early on in your relationship, and something the both of you had grown to love and crave whenever you cuddled together. The intimacy of being so close to each other was something you hadn’t known you’d love so much, but having Jake so close to you, him holding you close, well that something you would never tire of. And for Jake, he would forever be grateful to be able to go to sleep holding the love of his life, and her still be there in the same position, tucked comfortably into his side, the next morning. No matter how much the pair of you moved around in the night, he still got to wake with you by his side, and now, Jake couldn’t see himself spending his life any differently.

Waking up the next day, your throat is scratchy, eyes burning and bloodshot. Groaning, you snooze your blaring alarm, sending a quick text of ‘Hey Jake, I’m not feeling too great, can we push date night?’, to your boyfriend. While technically you lived together, Jake would often spend evenings at his best friend Javy’s house, it was closer to base and helped him to unwind from a stressful workday with someone who understood the ins and outs of the job. You didn’t take any offence to this, as Jake had been expecting you too, it was a way for Jake to unwind, and honestly, it was probably why your relationship was so healthy. Jake got the time to process his feelings, to then be able to get home to you and express them in a healthy manner. You would always support Jake’s out of work time with his squadron, it was almost like a second family, something you all desperately needed after the uranium mission.

It wasn’t uncommon to go to bed alone, especially if Jake had been having a stressful run at work, only to wake with a strong arm wrapped carefully around you, holding you close to his chest, your head resting on him like a pillow. You admired the relationship that Jake and Javy shared, the pair had been through a lot in such a short time, and where most people would have drifted apart, it only solidified their need for each other, feeling and acting more and more like brothers with each day they spent together. But it was when Jake came home to you acting off, that his worries couldn’t be soothed by his wingman. You were everything that Jake had ever dreamed of, and more if he was being honest, and when you acted not like yourself, it set alarm bells ringing for Jake. He had just found you, and in no world was he ready to lose you, especially not so soon.

Jake had been preoccupied all day, you had been withdrawn all evening, and slept through your first alarm, the one you routinely set so you could kiss Jake goodbye. It was something that Jake had grown to love, a simple addition to his morning routine, something he looked forward to each time he awoke to his alarm, getting to kiss you before he left always put him in a better mood, something that his fellow squad members had noticed, and perhaps teased him for.

Javy was the one who approached Jake about his sullen mood, there had been plenty of opportunities for Jake to tease and antagonise the others, yet the absence of Jake’s cocky tone over the radio was concerning to all. Jake’s demeanour had been so off that you woke to a string of concerned texts from Javy, asking if you were okay, if Jake and his family were alright, and the last, rather frantic message demanding to know if you’d broken up with him. If you didn’t feel as bad as you did, you would be texting Javy back with just as much concern for your boyfriend.

You busied yourself with as much work as you could while at home, cleaning, laundry, mindless admin for your job. The occasional tickle of a cough in the back of your throat, an unnecessary reminder that you were unwell. All you’d wanted to do since Jake got back from his deployment was to spend as much quality time together as physically possible, and being sick wasn’t in your plan.

Truthfully thinking, it was probably a bug that Jake had brought back with him. Unfortunately for you, Jake had an absurdly strong immune system, he rarely was ill, often just carrying the bug home to you, which consequently caused you to be unwell. You had a decently strong immune system, but the intensity of your symptoms often left you bedridden with a fever for days.

Gently tucking a strand of loose hair from your messy sleep hair, Jake finally voices his concerns, “Don’t even think about going to work today.” It takes you a few long moments to process Jake’s words, to which you immediately start to protest, mumbling on and on about how you had to work, denying that you weren’t feeling your best.

Furrowing his brows, Jake is again growing more and more concerned about you. Deciding with a different tactic, Jake reaches out to slowly halt you buttoning up your work uniform, “Would you rather go to work, and suffer all day, because you obviously don’t feel well, or stay in bed and get cuddles and forehead kisses and watch movies with me?”

The halting of your weak movements and silence has Jake relaxing, he knew you well enough to know that you were giving in, thinking over the two scenarios. You never could get enough cuddles and kisses from Jake. Never.

Turning slowly towards him, you look sheepishly up at Jake, hands tugging at your uniform, a desperate attempt to get out of the restrictive and stiff material and back into Jake’s sweatshirt. A ghost of a smile flickered across his lips, on the rare occasion you did get sick, you were so needy, having to have Jake nearby at all times as a comforting presence.

Helping you out of your uniform, Jake carefully pulls his sweater back over your head, kissing the crown of your head lovingly. A soft whine slips through your lips, the sudden movements making your head spin, fingers digging into Jake’s arms, desperate for something to ground you.

“Get back in bed. Now. You don’t need to be up and about right now. You need to rest darlin’.” Too lightheaded to even attempt to argue, you allow Jake to gently manhandle you back into bed, tucking your comforter up to your shoulders, making sure your pillows were fluffed and positioned just right, as to prevent any cricks in your neck.

Huffing, as you shift around, trying to get comfortable with all your aches and pains, you try to fight against Jake’s fussing, but soon giving up, too exhausted from just trying to get ready for work. You blink tiredly up at him, eyes dry and bloodshot, “You don’t have to stay and do this Jake. I’ll be okay.” You sit up slightly, pushing yourself against the pillows, “Anyways, you have training. You shouldn’t be here because I’ll get you sick.”

Jake doesn’t dignify your complaining with a verbal response, raising one eyebrow at you, keeping his stare strong and bordering on the edge of harshness. A stare which soon had you shifting uncomfortably under his gaze, shuffling back down in the bed, giving him what you hoped was an equally annoyed stare, but the way Jake’s shoulders shook, told you that it didn’t appear as you’d hoped.

Pouting, crossing your arms across your chest, you huff up at Jake, frustration creeping in as the sickness starts to fully take its toll on you. He sighs heavily, moving closer to your side, to which you continually avoid his gaze, growing more and more frustrated with Jake’s fussing, no matter how much you’d secretly crave, but would never outright admit.

Jake was never one to give in, especially where you were concerned. To his advantage, the two of you act eerily similar when you weren’t feeling your best, a lot of stubbornness and pushing the other away. He switched tactics, continuing to put away all your work clothes and tidying the room up, all the while keeping a close eye on you in case things got worse.

You soon grew tired of Jake’s approach, frustrated that you knew why he was doing what he was, and hating how effectively it’s working. Whining softly, you reach out for him, to which Jake finishes putting away your clothes and slowly moves back to your side.

A wave of nausea overcomes you as you stir from a much needed nap. Screwing your eyes tightly, you pray that the unpleasant feeling will pass, breathing shakily.

Scrambling off the bed, your feet momentarily tangling in the sheets in your haste, you dart into the bathroom, holding your breath and locking the door behind you. There were just some things you’d rather not have the love of your life see. Being this violently unwell was one of them.

There had been countless times when you’d tended to Jake when he was in your position, but the way you’d grown up often meant you’d have to take care of yourself. Even with someone as selfless as Jake, you struggled with the actual complexities of opening up and letting someone take over that caretaker role, the one you’d spent years perfecting for yourself.

The burn in the back of your throat is actually welcomed, the promise of feeling even a little better after throwing up, lingering in the back of your mind. There’s a soft knock on the door, then, a more concerned rattle of the door handle when you fail to reply, too busy trying to catch your breath in between heaves.

Your hair is pulled gently back from your face and neck, soothing fingers rubbing soft circles across the base of your skull. Jake. He ties your hair loosely into a very messy bun, the one he’s seen you do effortlessly, yet his not quite measuring up to the elegant flair yours did. Not that it mattered to you. Jake’s insistence to be a constant presence by your side was all you could dream for.

A few weaker dry heaves later, Jake is leaning away, reaching up to the sink, dampening a soft face cloth and tenderly wiping your face, then turning to grab a clean towel, dabbing your face dry as gently as he could. Your shaking fingers cling feebly to the cold tiles, a desperate plea for the nausea to wane.

A soft whimper of his name had Jake shushing you gently, pressing gentle kisses to your forehead, “You’re going to feel so much better after this, the worst part is over darlin’.” Another soft whimpery sigh is his reply, too drained by this sickness to form any verbal response. The back of his hand on your clammy forehead told him your fever still wasn’t improving, despite your previous insistence that you were ‘fine’.

Sighing deeply, Jake braces himself, pulling himself to stand and bringing you up gently with him, letting you rest heavily against the counter, swaying slightly with each shuddering breath. His large palms cup your face, his worried green eyes searching yours for any sign that you could actually understand him.

“Darlin’…” He trails off as your eyes shift to meet his concerned gaze, “I know you’re gonna hate me for this, but I- We have to get that fever down. You need to shower.” An instant feeble protest from you comes in whines and shifting hesitantly away from him, a move which Jake preempts, catching your arm in gentle hold, just enough is this state to keep you in place. His soothing tone washes over you, eyes flickering closed and nodding cautiously at his next words, “I promise we will get you all cleaned up and feeling so much better when we’re done. I promise you darlin’.”

The spray of the shower is a shock to your clammy skin, much colder than you normally preferred, one that has you hugging yourself closely to Jake’s body, both for warmth and stability.

“I know you hate being sick, but you need to let me care for you. Let me take care of you, okay?”

Instead of the protests Jake is anticipating, he’s met with a weak nod, and your body going more lax under his touch, letting him manhandle you as he saw fit, something you usually fought against with every scrap of energy you could. Now even more concerned with your health, Jake moves you both fully under the water, allowing the spray to cascade down your back and freshen you up.

You blink heavily, in a daze, as Jake methodically dries your body, applies your body lotion, and towel dries your hair, before blow drying it enough for you to sleep comfortably with. Jake’s soft mummerings of soothing praises and reassurances never cease, not as he helps you get dressed, or as he cleans up the bathroom as you sit and watch him from the bathroom counter.

Reaching a hand out to him, Jake ceases his tidying, by your side in one stride, cupping your face gently, peppering kisses across your face. An act which always elicits a soft giggle from you, no matter how you feel. A soft smile on his lips mirrors your own, you struggle to let Jake in enough to let him help you fully, but this was a fight he’d won, one that you willingly let him help you with. That alone was a major step forward in your relationship together.

Guiding you back to bed, Jake is cautious with each movement, all too familiar with how a sudden movement could cause another flare up of nausea. A soft pout is on your lips as he settles next to you, a knowing, sympathetic smile on his.

“I feel so gross and disgusting. I could’ve handled that myself. You didn’t have to see me so disgusting.”

A soft shake of his head, and Jake is lowering his head to meet your gaze, gently guiding your face up to try and catch your eye line.

“Shush, you aren’t disgusting at all sweetheart, it’s only natural.” When you refuse to meet his gaze he continues, “And you’ve seen me in way worse states than that. From drinking too much with Coyote to nightmares after deployments, you’re always there for me.” You finally flick your eyes to his glistening green ones, “Let me take care of you darlin’.”

Swallowing thickly, blinking back stinging tears, you nod sharply, emotions bubbling up with his loving words. Jake wasn’t one to open up fully either, you guess that’s why you work so well together. A pair of people too accustomed to looking after themselves, to observing the most minor changes in their partner, to now allowing someone else to help them.

You shift closer to Jake, snuggling into his side, resting your head on his shoulder, “Thank you. I know I’m stubborn when I’m sick, but thank you for always being here to look after me.” A curt nod, and Jake is pulling you impossibly closer to his side.

“You’re welcome. You don’t have to thank me for looking after you. Ever. But you’re welcome darlin’.”

You drop the eye contact, shy, but nodding in understanding. This is how it’ll always be with the pair of you, you’ll always look after each other, no matter how much the other tries to fight the help. You’d always be there to support each other.

The pair of you stay like that for a while, in your feverish state, you’re unsure of how much time passes. All that matters is that Jake is by your side. Jake eventually pulls away from you slightly, shushing your complaints before you can even voice them.

“I’m just going to grab you something to eat. Just something plain. It’ll settle your stomach enough so you can get some medicine and hopefully some proper sleep.”

Scrunching your nose up in displeasure of this plan, you shake your head slowly, “No way am I even thinking about eating something right now Jake! My throat hurts so badly- And no to that disgusting medicine you’re gonna try to give me.”

A smirk twitches on Jake’s lips, you knew him too well, and vice versa. With a soft kiss to the crown of your head, Jake shifts away from you, tucking you back in bed properly. He pauses momentarily in the doorway, and looks back at you with a serious look on his face.

“If I see or hear you leave that bed, even once, I’m going to physically manhandle you back into it.”

Knowing full well that Jake is dead serious on his threat, you nod once and give him a mock salute, a small signal to him that you’re already beginning to feel more like yourself. He returns your salute with his own smirking, then he makes his way downstairs to grab you some saltine crackers and some water, along with a few medications to help you fight this illness.

The glare you send in Jake’s direction when he returns, does not have the desired effect. Instead of discouraging him to try and get you to cooperate with the food and medicines, all it does is make him chuckle as he resumes his position by your side, with a playful nudge.

“Jake…” You whined in protest when he offered you the open packet of crackers, a small detail not gone unnoticed by you, “I’m really not hungry right now. I just wanna sleep.”

Shrugging, Jake took a cracker for himself, crunching away at your side. You frown, those crackers were your crackers, and now your boyfriend, with a seemingly endless appetite, was tucking in to your snack. Huffing indignantly, you snatch the packet from his grasp, shifting to face away from him, slowly nibbling away at one.

Behind you, Jake has a content smile playing on his lips. His tactic of eating your food worked, again. He knew you’d know that’s what was happening, hence why you turned away from him. Jake was content enough to know that you were starting to feel better, it was often baby steps when you were this unwell. This was a big step in the right direction.

After nibbling your way through half the packet, you chance a glance over at Jake, who is carefully watching you and presses a kiss to your temple, “There you go darlin’. Do you think you could drink some water? It’ll make you feel a bit better.” Jake dips his head to catch your gaze, when you avoid eye contact, a move you pulled when you really didn’t want to do something he asked of you.

Focusing back on his hopeful gaze, you blink cautiously at him, unsure if your body could handle any more. While the strong wave of nausea had settled, it still lingered if you thought too hard about eating or drinking anything.

His gentle nudge drew you out of your overthinking, eyes flickering down to the glass in his outstretched hand. The familiar burning sensation of tears filling your eyes returns, which has Jake on high alert, immediately placing the glass down, out of your sight, concern and worry filling his own.

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay darlin’, what’s wrong?” His soothing tone is laced with poorly hidden panic at your emotional state. Jake hated to see you cry, especially when it was something out of his control that caused it, something he couldn’t fix. “Hey, look at me sweetheart. It’s okay, just please try and drink a little, for me?”

Wrapping your arms tightly around him, you cry softly into his chest, shaking your head gently. His hand carefully cradles the back of your head as he holds you tightly to him. Your voice is weak and cracks with emotion, “Jake… I really don’t think I can. It’s just-.” You cut yourself off and look up at him, resting your chin on his chest, “You always take such good care of me. No one has ever done that before.” Jake nods in understanding, he already knew that, it just adds to his confusion as to why you’re suddenly crying over him offering you a glass of water. “You made sure it was iced water, and you got me a straw because you know how much I don’t want to drink it. Jake, you’re so sweet and thoughtful, and I wish I wasn’t so sick because I just want to kiss you so badly.”

Jake nods once more, pulling you back close to his chest, finally understanding that he hadn’t done something wrong and crying just happened to be your go-to emotion when you didn’t feel well. He chuckles softly and presses multiple kisses to the top of your head, “No kisses until you’re better darlin’. You know the rules.” He’s sorely tempted to kiss away the pout that forms on your lips, he just knows that one sick person in the household was enough. It wouldn’t help either of you, if you had to call Javy to bring you food and medicine. Well, it'd be fun for you, Jake on the other hand would never hear the end of it from his squadron.

Offering you the glass again, Jake cradles the back of your neck as you take slow sips, not wanting you to choke or spill any. You don’t miss the way he shifts slightly to reach for the medicine bottle either. Narrowing your eyes at him, you pout, hoping that by some miracle he’ll give in, “I’m not having that stuff again Jake. It tastes gross. In no world does lemon taste like that.”

Jake chuckles softly, running a soothing hand back and forth over your back, fingers occasionally lightly scratching your scalp. “You’ve gotta try some of this, even just a little bit. I promise it’s not that bad darlin’, just try it.” Shaking your head vehemently, you scoot as far as you can to the edge of the mattress, until you’re perched precariously.

Jake reaches an arm out, curling his fingers around your shoulders and pulling you back towards him, your back pinned against his chest. Knowing you’re stuck now, you give in, going limp in his hold and leaning your head back on his shoulder.

He kisses your forehead softly, “Just try. For me?” He brings the small medicine cup up to your lips, as your eyes narrow at him. He gives you his signature shrug and smirk, you mock him as best could which pulls a chuckle from him. Reluctantly, you swallow the foul tasting syrup, immediately reaching for the water that Jake already had in his grasp. You gulp hurriedly, trying in vain to wash away the lingering taste, your glare returns, “If I didn’t love you so much, I’d hate you right now.”

He nudges you playfully, “What? I got you to take it. Did you seriously think the taste would’ve changed after a few months?” Huffing, you playfully shove him back, then when his laughter bubbles up again, you quickly press a kiss to his shoulder.

“I should’ve known better, but it said ‘new and improved recipe’! And you! You looked so disappointed that I wasn’t gonna take it, and you know I can’t say no to you when you look like that!” Jake has the audacity to do his smirk-shrug combo again, which has you laughing weakly along with him.

He swings his arm loosely around your shoulders, tucking you into his side. Finding Jake to be his usual personal body heater, you snuggle impossibly closer to him, head resting on his chest, listening to the soothing sounds of his heartbeat. Your poorly disguised yawn does not go missed by Jake, who’s now concerned that you probably haven’t slept properly in days, “Get some sleep, you need rest darlin’.”

Shaking your head vehemently, you curl around him, burying your head into the crook of his neck, inhaling deeply, whining when he tries to pull away so he could look at your face. “I don’t wanna sleep Jake.” You whine into his neck, “I just got you back, I don’t wanna lose any more time with you than I have too.”

Jake exhales slowly, it’s not the first time you’ve expressed this when he comes back from an extended deployment. Not that he particularly minded you being so invested in spending quality time together, it’s just this time with you being so unwell, you needed rest over anything else right now.

“Just go to sleep. I’ll still be here when you wake up.” There’s one more indignant huff from you, before a bigger yawn escapes you, he nudges you gently, kissing your forehead lovingly, “C’mon sweetheart, you know you’ll feel better for it.” When you peek a look at him, he can see the fear on your face. You’re scared he won’t be there when you wake you, that this was all a dream and he was still on deployment, or worse. He could see it so clearly now, the pain and deep-rooted fear in your glossy eyes. He had never seen you so fearful, it made his heart clench painfully.

“Darlin’. I promise you that I’ll be here when you wake up. I won’t leave your side. I promise.”

His smile is soft and for the first time since he got home, he feels relaxed knowing that you’re not suffering alone anymore. It occurred to him, more frequently the longer your relationship continued, that he never wanted you to be alone like that again, that he’d do anything to ensure you were looked after for the rest of your life. Well, more like the rest of his life, because he couldn’t see himself now without you. Jake needed you in his life, and it was clear now that you are going to spend the rest of your lives together.

He presses a soft kiss to the crown of your head as you doze lightly on his shoulder, eyes flickering momentarily over to his dresser where he’d placed the box a few weeks earlier. Resting his head against yours, he takes a moment to rest his eyes while he thinks over what the rest of his life was going to look like.

He was going to ask you to marry him soon.

He was going to marry you.

tag list - from taglist or seemed interested in this fic! (let me know if you want to be added/removed)

@els-marvelvsp @sky2nd @nouis-bum @atarmychick007 @solo2leo @jessicab1991 @avengersgirllorianna

#allina writes #jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #jake seresin x you #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake seresin fic #jake hangman seresin #hangman x reader #tgm fanfiction #top gun maverick fic #jake hangman seresin fic #tgm

[letswritestories101]

50 & 45 for the ask game! -@dragon-swords-prophecies

[Some OC questions]

Hi, @dragon-swords-prophecies thanks for ask! 😀

45. A character you no longer use?

That is a good question. Ecenssially, all the character lore from Between Worlds, the old version of Monarch. They are quite different from the current version and I don't intend to use any of them anymore.

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want

My God, you have given me too much power! XD

We have Monarch and my babies! They are my favorite characters to write and with such complex stories! And I was so mean to them, lol. They are in a world where people have developed super powers, everything went into chaos but it went very well until the arrival of giant monsters called Voids. The country in which the story takes place collapsed again and a lot of bad things happened. Then the Defenders division was created, which are superheroes being honest here, people trained only to deal with Voids, as the authorities were overwhelmed in dealing with the villains and these creatures at the same time. The story begins ten years after the last recorded attack by a Void and follows Sitara, a smart, witty and curious girl who wants to be a Defender and help fight villains, the job left knows. The problem? Sitara has genes that don't work. That is, she has no way to manifest the abilities she was born with, attributed by doctors as genetic malformations. And because she is an orphan and adopted, she has no way of finding out anything by tracing relatives. Everything changes when, one fine day in an event that is spoiler, but I guarantee it is kind of traumatic, her powers that are supposed to not work, guess what? They appear and suddenly she can follow her dream! What to do now?Exactly, study hard, because you are only a Defender if you pass a national exam and prove you have full control over your abilities. With this in mind, she aims to enter Monarch Academy, the school with the best preparatory course in the country. Sitara just doesn't expect that this would put her in the sights of such dangerous people. We still have Rin, a boy with ice powers and a traumatic and complicated life story, Perpetua, a girl who can manipulate time bubbles and is learning that things are more complicated than they seem, and Albedo and Allina, twins with teleportation and pyrokinesis respectively who are there because of a promise, among many others.

We also have Same Sky, the story that is helping me overcome my creative block. In Same Sky, society was divided between Extroverts and Introverts. Ana Luz and Yasu Amano are two students from different spectrums who end up studying together in their senior year after spring break. After a chaotic series of events, they end up becoming friends; but when their school takes a somewhat controversial stance on student division, they decide to put together a mixed group of extroverts and introverts to win the Spectral Festival to prove a point and their prize. What Yasu and Ana didn't expect was to end up falling in love halfway through; awkwardness, excitement, and friendship ensues.

And most recently the Order of the Wind Rose. Part of a universe I put together, and still very new, a group of 19 year olds take on the mantle of heroes/explorers of their world and try to save the world.

#yetanotherOCmeme #writeblr #creative wrting #wip #same sky #monarch

[colorfullife-fiona]

Download and use the format in the “Sample Paper.” Analyze the Case Study: U. S

Download and use the format in the “Sample Paper.” Analyze the Case Study: U. S

Download and use the format in the “Sample Paper.” Analyze the Case Study: U. S. Health Care Delivery In your own words, what is EBM? Is it a worthy goal for U.S. health care delivery? Why or why not. How has MMCI/Allina Health mirrored how U.S. health care delivery has evolved into a modern EMB institution? Create a thesis statement. Write a 2-3-page paper in APA (2020) format analyzing the…

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[infositely]

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[roosteraloha]

for worse

jake seresin x reader

wc - 5.5k

warnings - ANGST !! blood, injuries to reader, mentions cleaning up said injuries, arguments + discussions of chronic pain

disclaimer - ANY BLANK/AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED!! I also DO NOT give permission for any of my works to be copied, shared, compiled, translated or posted onto other sites!!

a/n - this is pure angst. i have no clue where this came from but I was so inspired and this just wrote itself.

reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated!!

It’s been a long few weeks for the both of you, not having much time to spend with each other. Having two very busy schedules often meant that one of you missed the other, and heartbreakingly, it was commonly by just a few minutes. Jake’s schedule was vastly more complicated than your own, with the possibility of receiving deployment papers or new missions, occasionally with almost no advance notice. Thankfully, the pair of you hadn’t had to worry about working through the complexities that came with being in a relationship during deployments yet, something that Jake was especially grateful for. He saw himself spending the rest of his life with you, if you let him, but knew a poorly timed deployment had the potential to ruin the longevity of your relationship. That is something that nags at the back of Jake’s mind each and every time he climbs into his plane.

Jake was deeply relieved to be heading home. The entire week had dragged, countless new training exercises and protocols had made for a physically and emotionally draining week. Heading home to spend the weekend with you was exactly what he needed. Still a relatively new relationship, Jake was uncharacteristically nervous, he was eager to take the next step, moving in together, but was keenly aware of just how flighty and generally anxious you were. Moving too fast with you would be heartbreaking, simply because he knew he could lose you, far easier than he gained you.

Pulling into his driveway, the dark house is highly concerning to Jake. Frowning, he checks his watch, and then his phone, acutely aware that he could’ve taken longer on base than he planned, only to find it was 6pm, the agreed upon time. He had text during his lunch break, a quick conversation that informed you that he’d be a bit later than anticipated, and your immediate response reassuring him that you’d be there anyway. What had happened in those six hours that you couldn’t let him know you wouldn’t be here to greet him.

A quick sweep of his house, and no sign of you. No keys, no shoes kicked off by the door, every room empty. Alarm bells start ringing, Jake knows you. You’re not one to not follow through on plans, you’d always text, call or anything you could to get the message through, that’s one of the first things Jake loved about you.

A rather rapid drive over to your apartment is not the calming result Jake was expecting. Actually, it’s far more alarming to have no response at the door, finding it void of you, not even tucked up in bed for an after work nap, like you had been known to do. Jake was half expecting to find you asleep in your apartment, but it being empty, that was far more concerning. It wasn’t like you to just disappear.

On the way back to his house, Jake swung by the café, wondering if you’d picked up an extra shift, and had just forgotten to let him know. His heart clenched when you weren’t there. Your colleagues told him they’d seen you leave at 4pm, your usual finishing time on Fridays, so you could spend extra time with Jake over the weekend. They too were concerned, the usually confident aviator, someone they’d grown to love having around, now having cracks in his carefree persona, his worry for you nearing panic.

Jake’s shoulders felt heavier when he returned home to no signs of you. The worry of not knowing where you were, weighing down on his heart, and his mind.

It was now 7PM.

Jake was still alone in his house, with no communication from you, and all he wanted was to know if you were okay or not.

With still no word from you, Jake decided to head to bed. While he was deeply concerned for you, he also knew he couldn’t stay up all night, he needed to sleep if he was going to look for you.

Trudging up the stairs, Jake’s heart grew heavier and heavier. His concern for you was growing with every hour that passed without any news from you. Exhaling deeply, Jake turned to his bedroom, pausing in the doorway to look at his bed, the side where you should be sleeping.

Brows furrowed, Jake’s eyes scanned the room again. Something was off, something was different from usual, a fact he knew due to his military level of attention to detail.

The right-hand bedside table. Your side.

A slight glisten caught Jake’s eye.

Cautiously approaching to get a better look, only to trip over something, stumbling and grabbing the bed to stay upright. Muttering grumbles under his breath, Jake looked down to see what he tripped over. A pair of boots. More specifically, your boots. His eyes widened at the realisation, eyes darting to the bedside table. Your keys. He knew they were yours from the cowboy hat keychain, the one he bought you from his last trip to Texas, something to remind you of him always.

Heart pounding in his chest, Jake rushes around the end of the bed, calling out for you, turning on countless lights, searching anywhere for you in the diminishing daylight.

The panic in Jake was rising, you weren’t downstairs, and he only had a few rooms left upstairs to check. A slight thud from his en-suite bathroom had him rushing back to his room, nudging the bathroom door open with caution, unsure of what he would find.

From the warm glow of the bedroom lights, Jake can see the outline of your body, curled up on the cold bathroom tiles, knees pulled tight to your chest, head resting against them. That relief he felt was short-lived.

Something was wrong.

Blinded by the immense relief of finding you, Jake pushes the door open further, a forceful shove which causes the door to slam into the wall, making you flinch at the sudden noise. "How long have you been home?! I’ve been looking around for you like crazy! I went to your place and you weren’t there, I even went to the café looking for you!” Jake’s tone is demanding, laced with anger and frustration that you must have been here all along and just never bothered to let him know.

Jake scoffed at your silence, you didn’t even look up at him, instead having remained staring at the ground like had been doing for who knows how long. There’s a quiet mumble that fills the otherwise silent bathroom, almost going unheard by an exasperated Jake. Spinning on his heels, he crosses the short distance between you both, and crouches down directly in front of you, taking a softer approach this time.

“Hey, darlin’. Look at me. Say that again.”

You swallow thickly, looking up, but not at Jake, instead straight past him, fixating on a tile in the shower wall.

“I uh- I can’t- We need to break up Jake.”

Blindsided by this, Jake mentally runs through the past few months, ensuring he didn’t miss any important dates, but your birthday and anniversary were still months away. Things were going well in your relationship, Jake was ready to ask you to move in next month, he’d even cleared a section of his wardrobe for you.

He’d clearly misread the situation.

Now deeply hurting, Jake’s heart dropped, he never wanted to hear those words from your mouth. Not ever. “So you just made that decision for me? You’re not even going to dignify me with that information while looking at me?” The hurt is clear in his voice, his southern drawl seeping through with the intensity of emotion.

You simply shrug, knowing if you look at him, you’d break down. Jake is- was the best relationship you ever had, and that’s why it needs to end now.

Clearing his throat that was thick with emotion, Jake tried to hide just how blindsided you’d made him, choosing to fight for you “Whether you like it or not, I'm not giving up on us. I’m not giving up on you.” Sighing deeply, eyes darting across your face, seeking to catch your eye line, searching for any hint of your emotion. “You gonna tell me where this is coming from? I can’t fix this if you don’t talk to me darlin’.”

Another half-hearted shrug.

Jake nudges you gently, getting rapidly more frustrated when you don’t respond to him at all, but still mindful of your body, and any sensitive areas he was aware of, that was always his priority. You, making sure you were safe and well.

One rather loud clear of his throat has your eyes on him, still refusing to meet his eyes, but this was progress and Jake could work with this. “Darlin’… I can’t fix this, I can’t fix us, if you don’t start talking to me.” At your continued silence, Jake raises an eyebrow expectantly, aware of how emotionally fragile you could be right now, and not wanting to push you much more if he could help it. “Cry, yell, whatever - I'm not gonna leave your side. Especially not until you talk to me.”

Uncharacteristically, you lash out, emotions bubbling over, this conversation not going the way you’d planned it in your head. You should’ve known better. Jake was always one to fight for what he loved. One to fight for you. “Why do you always think there is something to fix?! Am I that big of a burden to you? Hell, what if this is something you cant fix, huh? What then?”

Eyes widened in pure shock at your outburst, Jake shifts to sit in front of you, back pressed against the shower door mirroring you, his feet either side of yours. “You wanna try that again darlin’? Don’t think I didn’t catch that but about calling yourself a burden.” Jake shakes his head in disbelief, it seemed that no matter how many times he reassured you that you were never a burden to him, it never got through to you, you would always view yourself that way.

Now you just shook your head and shrugged weakly, the fight going out of you. Another alarming thing to Jake. “I'm here and I'm not leaving or letting you change the subject. Now talk to me.”

Your eyes dart away from Jake’s face, back to the same tile on the shower wall. Another shrug, to which Jake nudges your knee with his own, clearing his throat again, this time to try and coax you to start talking to him, to go back to being open with him, instead of closing yourself off to him and your relationship.

“You don't deserve someone like me. You deserve someone better.” You breathe out shakily, tears brimming in your eyes, as you finally make direct eye contact with Jake. “Someone like you, shouldn’t be stuck and burdened with someone like me. You deserve so much better than me Jake. I’m sorry I can’t be that for you, but I can’t keep doing this. We need to break up. It’s what’s best for you.”

Now you’d given Jake an idea of where your head was at, what your thought process was, and how he could try and fix this. Even if it meant he’d lose your relationship, the one thing Jake would not lose was you. He just couldn’t.

Attempting a different approach, Jake exhaled slowly, resting a hand on your knee, taking note of you still in your work uniform. You had to have been sitting here alone, in the dark, for hours. "Hey darlin’, look at me properly. I’m here, I'm listening. You can tell me anything. You know that.”

Jake tilted his head slightly, watching you carefully, slowly coaxing you to answer him in any way he knew, “I uh-…” Stopping and trailing off several times in quick succession is only adding to Jake’s concern for your wellbeing, but giving him a better idea of how to get through to you.

Squeezing your knee gently, Jake gained your eyes dart back on his, wide and fearful, a change from the closed off and disassociated look you’d had before. “You don't have to pretend to be fine with me.”

“I feel like the pain is all I am anymore.”

That was not what Jake was expecting at all. Sighing heavily at the idea that you felt like your pain has taken over your entire life, Jake squeezed your knee again, trying to give you as much comfort as you’d let him. With no verbal response from Jake, you carry on, “I know it's selfish, but sometimes I wish someone would just take care of me. So I can just shut off, and not have to deal with everything else for once, y’know?” Sniffling, the first tears spill down your cheeks, “No one ever helped me when I needed it. so, I just try to do my best to keep all that to myself. I don’t want to be a burden Jake. But I can’t keep doing this. I can’t… I can't continue this relationship based on half-truths and hiding my feelings. You deserve better than that Jake, and it breaks my heart that I can’t be that person for you.”

Jake’s eyes burn with emotion at your words, you were constantly putting others before your own well-being, even if it meant leaving your relationship. Leaving him. And it breaks his heart that someone has made you feel like your pain is too big a burden to share, even with those you love. “I know you feel like you're alone and I'm not going to invalidate that. But I can tell you that I'm here. and I know there are other people who want to help if you'll let them.”

Sniffling and nodding reluctantly, you blink back more tears, looking properly at Jake for the first time in this conversation, finding his eyes glassy, with nothing but love and care for you in his green eyes. Nodding himself at finally getting through to you, Jake smiles softly, “Darlin’, I can't promise you that you aren't going to have any more hardship or pain. But what I can promise you, is that I'm always going to be right here to get you through it. Always.”

Bottom lip trembling, you shakily reach a hand out to Jake, seeking his comfort, resigning from your fight to break up, craving him to hold you. He always does know the right thing to say. Assessing your body language, Jake takes your outstretched hand, moving to sit next to you, a strong arm around your shoulders, pulling you close to his body, “It’s okay darlin’. Just let it all out.”

A sob gets stuck in your throat, choking on it as you try and fail to take a deep breath. Jake’s thumb rubbing soft, soothing circles across the bare skin of your arm is all it takes for the sobs to start. Finally releasing all of your pent up emotions, but majoritively of relief. Relief that Jake would never give up on you or your relationship without a fight, and luckily for you, he always knew the right thing to say, the right way to say it, and always, always had plenty of fight in him when it came down to you.

As your heavy sobs continue, your breathing becomes more erratic, something which Jake seems to instinctively pick up on, soft muttering of reassurances, and pressing soft kisses to the crown of your head, stroking your hair softly, “It's okay, deep breaths. That's it, in and out.” Helping to get your breathing back under control, and your sobs to ease into an occasional sniffle, Jake continues to pepper soft kisses across your cheeks and forehead, “There you go, that’s better darlin’. I’m here. I’ve got you.”

Your fist is clenched tightly into Jake’s shirt, tears silently streaming down your cheeks, a soft whine leaving your lips when Jake tries to coax you away from his neck, to get a proper look at you. He smiles softly, brushing the last tears from your cheeks gently with his thumbs, “I know darlin’, but you gotta let me up. You need something to eat and then some sleep, okay?”

Another soft whine pulls a chuckle from Jake, who gently moves you off his lap, allowing him to stand. Moving to turn on the bathroom light, a glinting fragment catches his eye. Scanning the rest of the bathroom, there’s several more fragments glistening by you on the tiled floor, and a few scattered across the counter.

Jake quickly flips the light switch, illuminating the bathroom in a soft glow. The bathroom counter is bare, various objects scattered across the far side of the bathroom. The glistening Jake saw was in fact various sized fragments of the countertop mirror.

Upon closer inspection, several fragments were covered in small amounts of blood. Panic stricken that you could be hurt, Jake is immediately back by your side, eyes darting over you, scanning your body for any signs of injuries. Clearing your throat softly, you try to surreptitiously slip your left hand behind your back, not wanting Jake to be alarmed if he noticed you were injured.

Ever the eagle-eyed observer, Jake’s concerned gaze is instantly back on you, stepping closer to you slowly, cautious as to not spook you. Kneeling down in front of you, Jake reaches out for your hand, brows furrowed and eyes full of concern. While an emotional person, you weren’t one to lash out and act recklessly, which is why Jake’s concern and worry for your wellbeing is evergrowing today.

Having slightly zoned out again, you flinch suddenly as Jake’s hand comes into your eye line, head hitting the bathroom under-sink cabinet with a dull thud, one that has Jake visibly wincing. Once again reaching out for you, his heart drops when you scramble away from him, hands getting caught on the loose mirror fragments behind you.

Your eyes are wide and full of distress, a look Jake hates to see in you. Your bottom lip is wobbling again as you look from your hands to Jake and back again several times, as if you didn’t know what to do, and Jake would. Sighing softly, Jake crouches before you, speaking quietly and calmly, “I can't clean you up if you keep flinching away from me so that I can't touch you. Will you give me your hand?” One hand slowly outstretched, palm side up as a gentle reminder he’d always be there for you, “C’mon darlin’. Please?”

A shaky and rather hesitant nod from you has Jake shifting ever so slightly closer to you, trying to get a better look at your hands. This time you don’t flinch, instead looking up at Jake with sorrowful eyes, the intensity of pain that you’re feeling almost becoming too much to hide like you normally would.

Grabbing you firmly by the elbows, Jake gently encourages you to stand, keeping you close to his body as you away on your unsteady feet. Having cleared the counter of any remaining shards, Jake’s hands mode to your waist, lifting you to sit on the countertop, a better hand for him to work on cleaning up your wounds.

“Be honest, how bad is this pain?”

A shrug, “Like a four out of ten? I’ve had worse pain.”

“When you say your pain's 'a four out of ten’, that's a normal person's ‘eight out of ten'.” Jake frowns, slightly frustrated that you are still downplaying your pain levels. “If it hurts, it hurts darlin’. Simple as that.”

A shy nod from you is rewarded with a soft kiss on your forehead, “I can sort out my hand, it’s my own fault. You don’t need to do it for me.” Jake routes through his medicine cabinet for some antiseptics and bandages to properly clean and dress your wounds. "This isn't up for discussion. I know you're used to looking out for yourself, but I need you to understand that you don't have to live like that anymore. I'm here. Just let me take care of you.” Another shy nod from you and a small smile tugs at the corner of his mouth, happy to have won this fight.

Gentle shushing from Jake is an attempt to soothe any incoming whimpers from the sting of the antiseptic, only to be cut off by a wince upon finding a sliver of glass embedded in your left hand. Blankly, you just look up at Jake and shake your head, as if to say, ‘please don’t do what I think you’re going to do’, but with the resignation that you knew Jake always put your wellbeing first, and he’d do exactly that.

Jake has to grit his teeth as he removes the sliver, pressing kissing of praise when you only whine once, an improvement on the last time Jake had to patch you up. Eying the antiseptic bottle warily, you try to slip off the counter, a strong desire to avoid anymore pain, but a firm hand on your waist tells you Jake isn’t having any of it.

A few swipes into Jake clearing your wound has you hissing in pain, kicking your feet out, trying to push him away, the burning sting of pain almost becoming all-consuming. "I know it hurts, I know. We're almost done darlin’, you’re doing so well.” Next is a dressing and a loose bandage, Jake all too aware of how much you fiddle with tight bandages, there being no point applying on properly when you’re going to sleep soon.

Your eyes light up in relief when Jake tidied up the first aid supplies, “All done?” A terse nod from Jake has you smiling softly, tugging on the bottom of Jake’s shirt, pulling him back towards you, arms circling his waist as you hug him tightly, “Thank you.” A small smile flickers on Jake’s lips, kissing the crown of your head several times, returning your loving embrace, “Always.”

Having scooped you up carefully off his bathroom counter, Jake carries you back downstairs, sitting on an empty section of kitchen worktop. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, “Now, you just sit there and I'm gonna make you something to eat. We're gonna talk this out more tomorrow. We both need some food and sleep first.” His jaw is clenched tightly, expecting you to argue back and fight him on this, but is pleasantly surprised and relieved when you pull him closer, nuzzling your head into his chest as you nod.

“But first, one important thing, that I’m not arguing with you over. We’re not breaking up. I won’t let that happen.”

Opening your mouth to speak your mind, you pause, Jake raising a challenging eyebrow, almost daring you to fight him on this again. Deciding that Jake was perhaps right, as much as you’d rather not admit it to his face, he usually was right when it came to you and your relationship. Opting to shut your mouth and let Jake take care of you, you nod curtly, watching him step away and busy himself around the kitchen.

It’s fascinating to watch the man you love, so dedicated to taking care of you, work in the kitchen, soon noticing the ingredients he’s picking out, registering that Jake is making your favourite comfort food. Tears burn the back of your eyes, you’ve never had someone so content and determined to take extra time from their day to make you feel better.

Jake immediately is back at your side, hand gently cupping your cheeks, when he notices your expression, searching your eyes for any dog of what had caused your sudden emotion, “Hey, hey, hey, what’s wrong darlin’?” Eyes darting down you hand, his fingers gently running over the fresh bandage on your hand, looking for any sign of rebleeding, “Is it your hand? Are you in a lot of pain? Do you need your painkillers? I can get them for you?” Jake pulls away from you, moving to get any painkillers you might need, ever the attentive boyfriend you’d grown to love with your whole heart.

You smile sweetly up at Jake, reaching out for him with glassy eyes, pulling him back to stand between your legs, hand framing his face, stroking gently against the day old stubble. “Jake. Just stop for a second. I’m okay, I promise you. I’m just thinking about how grateful I am to have you to take care of me.” Relieved, Jake kisses you gently, “Even when you fight me when I try and take care of you?” He’s teasing now, you can tell, shaking your head and smiling, you pull him closer by the collar of his shirt, kissing him lovingly, “Of course. I will always be grateful for you Jake, even when I don’t always want your help.”

Kissing you gently again, Jake steps away, lifting you off the counter and leading you into the dining room, setting a portion of food in front of you first, then moving to the adjacent chair and setting down his own. Watching you take the first few bites, Jake only starts eating when he’s entirely sure that your food is okay for your taste.

Finishing your plate, you're surprised at how hungry you actually were. Smiling softly, Jake slides his half empty plate in front of you, content to sacrifice his meal to ensure you don't go hungry. You beam over at him, offering him the occasional forkful.

You’d always take care of each other.

Back in his bedroom, Jake pulls an old t-shirt from his closet, one that he knew you had a not-so-secret favouritism for. Setting the shirt down on the edge of the bed, Jake tenderly starts to help you out of your work uniform. Cautious of how tired you are now seeming, he takes great care to do most of the complicated things for you.

Pulling his shirt over your head, Jake smooths your hair out, combing it out of your tight work hairstyle with gentle fingers, helping to pull your arms through the sleeves, smiling to himself when you can feel the tension of the day leaving your body.

A tired whine leaves your lips when Jake tries to coax back to stand, trying to lead you into the bathroom to fully get ready for bed. Your protests are cut off by a yawn, Jake chuckles, “C’mon darlin’, I know you’re tired, but you’ve got to. You’ll feel better.” A disgruntled grunt from you has Jake laughing, successfully managing to coax you into his bathroom.

Lifting you back onto the counter, Jake pulls out your toothbrush, then his own. He watches you carefully, wiping your mouth with a fresh washcloth when you're finished. Reaching for the hairbrush he bought for you at his place, Jake parts your hair, brushing each section carefully, not wanting to tug on any knots. You giggle at Jake’s attempts to try and tie your hair back, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek when he surrenders the brush to you and letting you pull your hair out of your face properly.

Jake sets a glass of iced water on your bedside table, having carried you the short distance from his bathroom to the bed, tucking the covers over you carefully. He even brought an extra blanket from downstairs to ensure you’d be warm enough, or to at least comfort you a bit more, aware enough of your sleeping habits, to not tuck you in too tightly, and wait until he was next to you to try and help you sleep soundly.

Propping you up against his chest, Jake hands you an anti-nausea tablet, one you occasionally took on your bad days, one that Jake had noticed you’d need through your body language. Staring at it in your hand for a few seconds, you work up the mental courage to swallow, gulping some of the water down to discourage the bitter taste from lingering. He hands you a small blister packet of them, all too aware that you could wake up and need more, but would be too anxious to wake Jake up. It was little things, the basic gestures and actions that made you fall more in love with Jake each and every day that you spend in a relationship together.

Resting your head gently on Jake’s chest, with one arm carefully resting over his torso, you inhale deeply, cut off by a big yawn. Jake secured his arm around your body, pulling the blanket around your exposed arms, his hand coming to rest at the base of your neck, fingers occasionally tracing soft circles onto your scalp, easing the tension there.

The house is quiet, which is not unusual for being so close to a base at this time of night, every for the quiet, yet reassuring mumblings from Jake, reminding you that he’s always going to be there for you, there to take care of you, and most importantly, how much he loves you.

“Next time it gets this bad, you call me okay?” He looks down at you, there’s nothing but love and concern for you in his eyes, and you nod shyly, slightly embarrassed of how your choice to hide away from Jake had in fact caused him more worry, which was what you had been trying to avoid all along.

“You can't keep hiding this stuff.” He lifts your chin up gently with his other hand, trying to get you to look at him again, “I need to be able to trust you to tell me when you're hurting. Whether that’s physically or mentally, okay?”

Gaze dropping down from his green eyes, Jake is quick to whisper more reassurances to you, pushing stray hairs behind your ear, “You are so much stronger and braver than you think you are.” There’s more on the tip of his tongue if you even look like you’re going to dispute his words, yet to his surprise, you nod shyly, eyes flickering back to his loving gaze, “I think I’m starting to get that.” It was a rather shy and quiet admission, yet Jake’s face lit up with pride at your words, and his smile only grew and you continued, “I know that I used to disagree with you rather strongly, but thank you for helping me see clearly. I’m a better person with you in my life Jake. You make me better.”

Jake hums in agreement, it wasn’t exactly hard to see how much better you two were together, how much you bettered the other. This was a first was both you and Jake, and a joy that you both got to discover this kind of loving relationship with each other.

“We’ll talk more about this tomorrow when we’re both properly rested, but I hope you realise that I’ll always fight for this - for us.” Your eyes are fixated on his and you listen intently to what he has to say, majorly aware that the way you went about bringing this topic up to Jake, was the complete wrong thing. Jake wouldn’t give you up without a fight.

Exhaling deeply, Jake offers a different perspective, “Look at it this way - would you love me still if I was the one in so much pain? Would you stay with me for the rest of our lives, like I will for you?”

Your response is instant, “Of course. You know I would.” Jake’s mouth twitches into a soft smile, easing an eyebrow and waiting for you to realise. Your eyes widen as it clicks, looking down at your lap shyly, “Oh… Thanks Jake.” Nodding, he kisses the top of your head, pulling you tightly back to his side.

You can’t help the soft laughter that bubbles up as Jake peppers your face with kisses, there’s not an inch of your face that doesn’t get covered in multiple kisses. Jake can’t fight his own laughter at your infectious one, continuing to kiss you all over, moving to pepper kisses on your hair and neck.

Jake only let up on his over the top display of his affection for you, when it’s clear that you’re struggling to catch your breath because you’re laughing so much at his antics. Grinning, he pulls you close to him, a projective arm around your shoulders while you rest half on his chest, covering you both with the blanket, pressing a final sweet kiss to your forehead, “I love you so much darlin’.”

Smiling tiredly up at him, “I love you too Jake. More than you know.”

While the pair of you had a serious conversation ahead of you, Jake and yourself knew that as long as you had each other, you’d make it through, no matter what life threw at you.

You’d get the chance to spend the rest of your lives with each other.

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