#and hoped that nobody would notice

[autisticlenaluthor]

i’m rewatching supergirl and… why is there a random infant incubator in the DEO???

#supergirl #did the set team just throw in whatever medical equipment they could get their hands on #and hoped that nobody would notice

[sneez]

conrad veidt would make a great tragedian i think

#pathologic #conrad veidt #artwork #scopophobia #id in alt text #if any of you actually benefit from IDs id be very grateful to know if you prefer them in the alt text or in the post body! #anyway :D HIM #this is caligari-era connie obviously. i was saying this the other day but later connie would be a great saburov i think #i cant decide if i prefer the idea of him playing every tragedian or him being a very obviously incongruous tragedian who has just painted #his face to look like a mask and is hoping nobody will notice #also please ignore that the lighting doesnt make sense on the second one i used reference images lit from two different angles and didnt #notice until i had rendered it out because i always flip my canvas so often and im too lazy to fix it #anyway (part 2) i am still on my conrad veidt autism explosion and i am having a great time. i am having so much fun. i love he #i hope you are all well too my friends! term just finished for me so i am back hoam :D yaaay

[far-beyond-saving]

"'You're so different,' he says, shaking his head and squinting at me.

'I may have grown a few centimetres since I was eleven.'

'No, it's—' He stops himself.

I put down my phone. 'What? It's what?'

'You're more serious.'

I don't remember not being serious. As far as I'm concerened, I came out of the womb spouting cynicism and wishing for rain." (Oseman 73)

This is an analysis of Tori Spring and her unreliability as a narrator. It will be incredibly long, so I hope I do not bore anyone.

Lucas, as we know, had been Tori's best friend throughout elementary school. He had a dream, to chase after his childhood best friend and start a beautiful romance—which was nicely foreshadowed by the line: "'[The Great Gatsby is] about...' He pauses to think. 'It's about someone who's in love with a dream'" (72). However, he realizes that she wasn't the person he thought she was. Or rather, she isn't the person she used to be.

Alongside Lucas, there are two other characters that hint at the fact that Tori was never this pessimistic: Mr. Kent and Becky.

Near the beginning of the novel, Tori mentions how she and Kent know each other quite well because he has been her teacher for over five years. And, throughout the novel, Kent continuously shows his concern for Tori and her attitude towards life. It would make a lot of sense for him to be this concerned if he had actually seen life in Tori to begin with. Along with that, it is very clear that Tori is liked by the teachers, as stated by Becky on page 79. Again, it would make more sense for this to be the case if she was a different person when she was younger.

Finally: Becky. Throughout the novel, Tori feels incredibly jealous towards her best friend, and she feels the gap between them comes from the fact that Becky moved on while she stayed exactly where she was. However, during their argument after the Solitaire party, Becky says, "you've changed. I might have changed too, but you definitely have. And that's not necessarily a bad thing, but it's true" (310). This completely contradicts everything Tori has told the reader.

The scene in which Tori reads her old diary illustrates my point perfectly.

"Up at the crack of 10:30am. Becky et moi went to the cinema today and saw Pirates of the Carribean (is that how you spell it???) 2 and OMG it was SO GOOD. Becky thinks Orlando Bloom is the fittest. Then we went to get pizza in the high street she had Hawaiian but obviously mine was plain cheese. YUM! She's coming round next week for a sleepover too. She says she needs to tell me about a boy that she likes!! And we're going to eat so much food and stay up all night and watch films!!!!!" (274)

It's very clear with the exclamation marks and enthusiasm in her tone that no, she was not born serious. Unlike now, Tori used to be genuinely happy to listen to Becky's relationships with boys. And—my favourite detail—the use of French in the second sentence. The word "moi" was almost always used by tweens as a quirky replacement for "me" (source: me. I used to use that word all of the time because I thought it was cute and silly. Gross). This is my favourite detail because of an earlier scene with Oliver when Tori says, "Are you suggesting that Charlie is better at Mario Kart than moi?" (63). Now, this could just be a coincidence, but I like to think that this is Tori's inner child being revealed to her little brother, especially because she would never speak to anyone else in that way. But, I digress.

So, I have now established how Tori has been unreliable with the way she describes herself, but what else has she been lying about? I think the most obvious answer is her hatred and lack of knowledge about literature.

Unlike everything I explained above, Tori does admit to lying near the end of the book, saying that books scare her because of how personal they feel. However, there are many things that contradicted her prior to this reveal. For example, her grades in her previous English class—as mentioned by Kent—and the way she used to read with Lucas.

After Lucas speaks about the books he is currently reading, Tori tells the reader, "I nod as if I understand. I don't. I don't know a single thing about literature despite studying it for A level" (72). Yet when Michael tests her on famous literary works, she is able to answer every question correctly, once again contradicting everything she has said.

Her unreliability is not deliberate, it comes from lies she tells herself. However, it seems like she knows the truth deep down. But I guess she is justified. After all, it feels better to say you were born serious than to admit to the damage the world has done to you.

#i hope this is worth something to someone #oh god this is quite long #nobody would want to read such an essay #i hope it does not seem like i am grasping at straws this #these are just things that i noticed #i tried to follow mla quotation rules but i know i broke them in many different places #because i am not actually writing an essay #forgive me #tori spring #solitaire alice oseman #becky allen #lucas ryan #michael holden #solitaire analysis #cynic.txt

[the-not-so-dark-age]

Btw it's funny (curiously weird) that Rhaegar didn't follow the correct order when naming his kids after the 3 conquerors like...this guy is OBSESSED with prophecies and Aegon I and his fucking house history (valid) but when his daughter, the oldest child, was born he skipped Visenya and picked directly Rhaenys (who was the youngest of the 3 conquerors) lmao people are really that scared of Visenya????? (Well aside from Rhaenyra lmao)

Idk I'd expect something bolder from Rhaegar Targaryen. You know. The guy who was thought to be TPTWP. The guy who was expected to be a great king. The guy who had no fear when it came to create a huge crisis by kidnapping Lyanna Stark (or anyway making secret escape plans with her if she was willing). I thought he'd have more guts...

Ok Visenya gave birth to Maegor and supported him in his crazy reign (and was also a witch...that's kinda hot to me tbh) but is it really ok to remember this woman mainly as the mother of a very bad king rather than one of the fiercest warriors of Westeros and most of all one of the fucking conquerors😭

#justice for my girl visenya! #asoiaf #today I'm in an asoiaf mood in case nobody noticed #visenya targaryen #rhaegar targaryen #anyway the fact maybe he hoped for another girl that he would really name Visenya its funny if that third child is really jon lmao #jon you could have been such a wonderful new visenya... #i want to open rhaegar's silly brain and analyse it under a microscope...dude what were you smoking....

[cosmic-d1ce]

The idea of in the fml au some of the people coming together and throwing a party on the island which forever and Phil attend after the breakdown and from a distance you think that they are dancing together but when you get closer you can really tell who’s actually leading the pair

This came from the idea of fml!forever dipping fml!phil and him just laying in his arms not doing anything

Social gatherings got a lot harder for Phil after his final break and he really doesn't want to be there. But Forever does. He wants to be with Phil in front of people, like Phil is a trophy to show off and flaunt

He notices that nobody seems particularly happy to see him. He notices that every time Forever touches him, Missa seems more and more uncomfortable

They keep their distance from the people that seemed like they'd hurt them. Fit and Roier, Wilbur especially.

And they dance, although it feels to Phil a lot more like he's a doll being played with. Moved without resistance although he wished he could be anywhere but here. Emotionless and distant as Forever guides him, moves him as he pleases

Nobody notices. Nobody cares.

#qsmp #qsmp philza #qsmp forever #forever my love au #philever #forphil #Fml got me sjhsjshsjsh #Love this specifically #Phil giving up and just letting Forever do what he wants #Giving up his own autonomy because what other options are there #And the fact nobody looks close enough to notice anything is wrong #Phil so badly wishes someone would notice how wrong this is but nobody does #It destroys any hope he had left #This is his life now and nobody wants to help

[sillylittleguyinatrenchcoat]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MIKOTO KAYANO AT THIS TIME i love you so much….. my little mipy…….. my bingus even…………

#EVERYONE SAY HAPPY BDAY TO HIM!!!! LOOK AT HIM!!!!! HES A LITTLE BIRTHDAY BOYYYYY #my gf (real and true).. #me sneaking in my 0709/0609/0509 agenda like nobody would notice… #selfcare is shipping mikoto kayano with half the cast #anyways i! love! him!! the little guy of all time i hope he has a wonderful bday in prison :) #milgram #mikoto kayano #0709 #0509 #0609

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Genuine question: why doesn’t F@TT have its own bracket, like WTNV does?

Honest answer: I didn't think the fandom was this powerful.

Also, @fattsexyperson exists.

#Not A Poll #Ask #Anonymous #Like in 2017 the Wolf 359 fandom had me convinced that F@tT was the biggest actual play podcast behind TAZ and my friend was like #''Uh? Critical Role???'' and I was like ''No that's a very distant third I'm pretty sure.'' #And then over the past six+ years I was proven wrong. #Having a limit per-world instead of per-podcast was being kind to F@tT but I also thought I was being kind to TAZ and NADDP and D&Dads #(I didn't realize that I would count all the main D&Dads seasons as 1 campaign.) #I thought Sans would get through the first round or two EASILY and I really hope some people check out Interstitial. #There was one empty slot left in the unscripted bracket and I put a F@tT Bluff City character there because at this point F@tT is the only #improv show I listen to. #Did you notice that nobody submitted a Steeple Chase character? From the current TAZ arc? I think that's wild.

[crystal-verse]

i'm sick right now but i got tired of laying in bed so i got up and made this doodlepage. various WoLs, feat. @mistdrinkersblade 's Syla, @wanderer-of-light 's Vastha, @the-littlest-kojin 's Shio, and my own Sae'pheli'ehva.

#bound with thread | original posts #seal it with wax | art #divine being of crystal and star | k'pheli tia (sae'pheli'ehva) #hero from another star | others' wol #welcoming moon of the summer evening | vastha mhakaracca #i haven't drawn stormblood-era pheli much and i really should draw him more. his big braid is very fun. kilmaa vibes #anyways for those of you who notice that the marks by the corners of his eyes are a different color: those are tattoos! #pheli is afab and genderfluid but just uses he/him bc it's convenient that way. don't be weird about it k? it's my allowed bit of projectio #anyways you can probably tell where i ran low on spoons OTL #shio and vastha i'm so sorry i'll draw you both better/prettier at some point in the future #also also before i forget‚ i hope nobody minds that i tagged y'all. figured it would be polite to do #i did this in one sitting in one hour and my head hurts so i'ma go lay down nowww

[calandrinon]

i lied

this is real live footage of me and @notahorseindisguise

i am the one with the drum

#any excuse to post slutty moldovan thirst traps #not even the slightest bit of disrespect here #i mean #i absolutely would #zdob și zdub #well just iagupov really #but with that amount of iagupov you can excuse a multitude of sins #i am just going to hit post now and hope nobody notices me #i need more sleep

[termagax]

i dont knowwwwwwwwwww i just. my thing is that i think the changelings could have an interesting place in the narrative given jims whole conflict is about trying to navigate his place in two worlds neither of which he completely fits in but both of which he needs to be his complete and authentic self. but they shoot themselves in the foot by making strickler the main one and they get sooooo close to doing this with nomura before getting bored and doing it again but worse with strickler. so in my mind i think this is why i was so set on addy being a changeling because i want her to fill that narrative role of someone who's ACTUALLY chill about this dichotomy and who really loves this part of herself without the baggage inherent to nomnoms situation (not acknowledging strickler he did most of that to himself). i just think he needs someone who can show him that its actually genuinely very possible to have both halves of his heart especially post-potion. but man. you cant really get there without dancing around the janus order stuff. and i know if she was real it would just be a cheap lampshade like "welllll shes a polymorph so. no familiar no problem" but that opens up a can of worms that i feel responsible for. and just in general the entire thing has so much baggage. i wish this show was GOOD.

#like i like the concept that the changelings were troll babies tortured with dark magic i think for me it justifies arrghs fondness for her #because hes in an extremely similar situation and i think him watching it happen under his command would be enough for him to say hm. i can #do this anymore goodbye. and i like those kinds of dynamics a lot #so i feel like you can just take that aspect and run with it #instead of the familiars give them some sort or mild innate mental magic? so they can write their identities into peoples lives #so you can still get that sense of like. an invader where its not supposed to be #without having to touch goblin baby kidnapping #'but that ruins the whole plot with claire' idgaf figure it out. i would do somwthing wlse with that anyways #they retroactively imply claires magic is innate later on in wizards anyways #so if youre gonna do that just make her brother also have it in some way which would make him a valuable asset if noticed by someone like #strickler. make it smt with the bridge or some other thing where they neeeeeeeed a magic user and itd be too risky to like. kidnap a studen #so they cant take claire. or nobodys noticed she has powers yet #make it so the baby goes missing and nobody seems to remember him at all EXCEPT claire #bcz strickler mind powers. which tangent but u can also use later for his thing w jims mom #and makes the whole 'we have to erase her memories of him' less convoluted bullshit #anyways back on track. just have the baby at the bridge ceremony for magic power reasons and in the conflict smth grabs him and takes him #thru the portal in the hopes of opening the bridge frm the other side #anyways.tthey had options is all im saying and they chose to do it in the worst way possible #just scrap the janus order im not touching that #it was so fucking pointless anyways. they didnt DO anything not one single thing

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

Garak in "Second Skin": I will NEVER sacrifice myself for you people I will ALWAYS selfishly save my own life that is a PROMISE

Garak in "The Search, Part II", three episodes earlier: [sacrifices himself for these people even when he could have selfishly saved his own life]

#WHEN GHEMOR OMINOUSLY WARNS KIRA AT THE END THAT GARAK WILL BETRAY THEM LIKE AS IF HE'S BEEN TRYING TO DECEPTIVELY ACT TRUSTWORTHY??? #sir please. this man's whole Thing is to go around like ''ohoho I sure hope nobody notices my evil and dastardly deeds!!! #oh my super evil schemes only ended up benefitting the good guys after all? what an astounding turn of events!! oh my!!'' #Star Trek: Deep Space 9 #for context I've only seen up to Second Skin so far and I'm sure soon I'll finally get to an episode where Garak does Evil Demon Crimes #and then I'll look like a complete idiot for making this post. but so be it. I asked myself WWJSBD (What Would Julian Subatoi Bashir Do?) #and the answer was love and trust and have hope despite all the odds until absolutely forced to do otherwise <3 #Starky's Original Posts #although you know what maybe he just said that because Julian wasn't along this time lmao #''Is my dear doctor going on this mission perchance? No? Ohhh ok this time's different then. Fuck all the rest of you :)'' #''[remembers Julian's strange human trait of being sad when people he knows die] AGHHH FUCK. OK. CHANGED MY MIND STAY ALIVE PLS'' #the search part 2 is so fucked. btw. literally he died in Julian's arms. tv show written by SICKOS and PERVERTS and BASTARDS #anyways Garak was never going to kill Natima & Co. in Profit And Loss btw. change my mind. #OK I'M DONE

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

whats the move for convincing my mom to let me play creature feature songs at her halloween party

#shes approved jonathan coulton and jack stauber so far. #i know im not gonna get anywhere with ice nine kills because this is a party full of rural republican middle aged people #and i think screamo would genuinely kill some of them bc they think its devil music. not even joking there. #i feel like creature feature is toeing a thin line. my mom is cool and enjoys fun things. #my dad will tolerate it and reluctantly enjoy it if he gives it a chance. #i do not like 90% of their friends so if i have to sit here &endure their awful party well then i should at least be in charge of the music #my halloween playlist is 8 hours long and a solid 2-3 hours of it is creature feature. whats the move here boys #im thinking about pulling a john mulaney salt and pepper diner move. #sprinkle in creature feature with songs like monster mash and thriller and hope nobody notices. #im losing my mind a little bit rn but god damn it im going to enjoy myself some halloween music #WAIT I FORGOT. IVE ALREADY SNUCK ONE (1) CREATURE FEATURE SONG IN BECAUSE THEY DID A COVER OF GRIM GRINNING GHOSTS. #WE HAVE AN ENTRY POINT. THE FOUNDATIONS ARE CRUMBLING #my new hobby is exposing white conservatives in my area to devil music . my party now

[emdotcom]

Five! Nights!! Five Nights at Freddy's!

#emeraldart #mangle #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #foxy fnaf #spring bonnie #springtrap #the marrionette #the puppet #freddy fazbear #there are some details i hope nobody notices too bad such as glam fred in that mangle pic. i am posting that sepetately #also my fursona kissing mangle from fnaf But We DON'T NEED TO TALK ABOUT THAT-- #i YELLED when i saw that foxy pic when did i draw him saying that?? he would

[possiblytracker]

got dragged to a pub quiz with some of my housemates buddies and was fully convinced i was not really gonna have a good time and itd probably be too loud and i wouldnt be much help etc etc etc bc my mood is still not great but i forgot im a competitive motherfucker when it comes down to it and the sheer rush of euphoria that comes from knowing a few more obscure answers that had the rest of the room hemming and hawing is gonna carry me through the next week probably

#when nobody else in the wetherspoons in rural wales knows what the capital of florida is or what you call a female swan #the big ass grin spreading across my face and sheer rush of Power listening to 2 people the next table over arguing over whether #its jacksonville or miami. you Fools. you absolute buffoons. i know more than you/j/j/j/j #i am so exhausted now and the 'yea this is Over you are enjoying urself too late' sadness is creeping back in but it was worth it #we came 3rd...... the prize was a whole pitcher of some cocktail for the group but i do not drink so i just went home to bed #a female swan is called a pen btw i knew that six month long job spouting swan facts at 8 year olds would come in handy someday #IDK i still have a lot to work through but i feel like i should make a slightly less depressing post today skdfjh;; #shoutout to my housemate for always somehow noticing when i have just not left my room in a day and coming to drag me out of it #i was so close to just not eating again (which tbf. i didnt. until like 6pm whoops) #but now i have done that AND touched grass AND socialised AND feel good abt myself a bit.. so..... #i worry a lot that people dont really. notice or care that much when im struggling/when they do that its annoying or a burden so #im very grateful to have people who care about me enough to try and pull me out of it. i hope wherever i end up after this #that i can surround myself with more people like that #man this feels pretty bittersweet to think about as well but in more of a cathartic kinda way. i guess #trying to think abt things slightly more positively so i dont turn into a festering black pit of bad vibes for the next few weeks #and my blog still inexplicably feels like the nicest place to sort through this kinda thing

[just-a-queer-fanboy]

Accurate depiction of me reading a fanfic and not reading the tags first

#I DID NOT NEED TO READ A GRAPHIC SEX SCENE IN WALMART #as funny as it was it was very hard to try and scroll past and hope nobody would notice

[dreamlogic]

...

#shit chat #medical cw #meatsuit renno #finally worked up the guts to message the surgeon who did my hysterectomy like #hey i know it's normal to experience pain and stiffness for a while after this surgery like at least a couple months #but uuh. it's been 8 months and i still wake up feeling like shit most days? #pretty sure regular shooting pains where my right ovary used to be aren't normal almost a year after surgery? #like i could be wrong but i feel like i probably shouldn't need 1200mg of painkillers a day to manage constant throbbing abdominal aches #after i've hit the 'maximum recovery window' for this surgery uuh [checks calendar] ...nearly three times? #at least the fatigue has finally started to go away. i feel my vitality returning slowly but steadily #but i'm still not back to my pre-op activity or mobility levels cause OOF OUCH MY ABSOLUTE PELVIS #and i've been noticing an abnormal amount of abdominal bloating that doesn't seem to correlate with indigestion or other factors #and isn't fat from weight gain like i initially thought it was #idk maybe i'm paranoid but i read an article a while ago abt someone who had a 15lb cyst in that nobody noticed for over a year #bc they were AFAB & our pain is chronically underreported and not taken seriously when it is #like did y'all leave some forceps in my gut and now i'm growing a mass around it?? wtf???? #idk if i hope it's nothing so i don't have to deal with more medical bullshit or if i hope it's something to legitimize my experience #godddd it would be so satisfying if i got to tell my boss's boss who's been hounding me relentlessly about proformance and Managing Burnout #HEY JACKASS TURNS OUT I'M A VICTIM OF BOTCHED SURGERY AND YOU'RE A DICK FOR NOT GIVING ME ACCOMMODATIONS