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joy1579 · 4 years

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I have thoughts about Jaehee’s route.

Sympathy for Jaehee

Look no matter how you look at it Jumin failed to create a healthy and satisfying work environment for Jaehee. He refused to listen to her concerns regarding her ability to do what he was asking and completely overstepped his bounds with requests regarding her appearance and dress. He took her for granted and failed to give her the time off she needed to recover from her works physical and mental demands.

It’s clear Jaehee has low self-esteem and placed much of her self-worth in being employed and independent. She’s used to being told that she is a burden and so she works insanely hard to prove people wrong. She also forgoes asking for help to avoid seeming greedy or useless. All of this makes her very difficult for many people to read. She hides behind this mask of professional formality to avoid anyone seeing how hard things are for her. The problem with this is that she is very likely to bottle up her emotions until she does something rash (as we see in her route). She needs someone empathetic and perceptive enough to notice when she’s struggling BEFORE she makes those irrational decisions.

I understand where she’s coming from. She’s just found something she’s passionate about and wants to throw herself into it with everything she has because she’s never had something this important to her. She’s tired and frustrated in her job and she feels creatively stifled by Jumin’s strict policies. All of this culminates into a steadfast stubbornness mixed with the desire to set herself apart from the image she’s hidden behind for so long.

Had Jumin simply accepted her interest and allowed her the freedom to do the coffee project however she saw fit I believe much of the drama could have been avoided. Had he put himself in her shoes he would have been able to understand that a little encouragement and freedom goes a long way but empathy is not his strong suit so he didn’t.

Sympathy for Jumin

What Jaehee did WAS insubordination. Plain and simple and that is technically a fire-able offense, though I agree he over-reacted. He told her to prioritize the cat hotel over the coffee shop and even if she didn’t agree no one can say she gave the cat project her all when she used slides mad by someone else and had a social lunch rather than look over edit and prepare for the presentation. It was also very clear that Jumin wanted Elizabeth as the mascot, she had to have Known that the second he brought up the cat hotel (he also mentions it directly to MC but I’m not sure if it’s in a phone call or a chatroom so I won’t count that). So by including an alternate and unapproved logo she was absolutely out of line.

Jumin struggles with empathy and emotional expressiveness because of his cold and analytical upbringing. He’s used to people trying to use, manipulate and cheat him so he constantly has his guard up never letting people in. the problem is when you build these walls from a young age you never learn how to see the world from someone else’s point of view. This leads to people not understanding what his actions mean as well as him not understanding other people’s actions. He also learned very early to suppress and deny his emotions for the sake of professionalism and because he learned it so early he finds it difficult to understand that other people cannot do this.

I understand why he is so frustrated, he feels ganged up on by zen, seven, and Jaehee. Three of his five closest friends (and let us not overlook the fact that of the remaining two 1 is growing increasingly isolated for unknown reasons meaning that he only has Yoosung left on his side). he expresses this feeling in one of his calls asking MC if Zen and Seven are messing with him, in this moment not believing that Jaehee will go along with them. As much as he denies it Jaehee has been a constant in his life for 2 years and he trusts her loyalty and perfectionism so when she goes along with his plan it must have felt like quite the betrayal.

Conclusion

NO-ONE is blameless in this situation. Jumin neglected Jaehee’s physical and emotional wellbeing, and Jaehee reacted rashly by rebelling against one of Jumins passion projects.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not suggesting that Jaehee stay in her assistant position to avoid stepping on Jumin’s toes. Jaehee deserves to be happy and chase her passion. Unless Jumin exhibits REAL change and emotional growth I could never in good conscious recommend she stay at that job. That being said I think she handled her exit from the company poorly. I believe that Jumin should have accepted the coffee shop project Jaehee worked so hard on and praised her for her obvious dedication and excellence. This would have eased much of the tension on Jaehee as Mark Twain put it “I can live two months on a good compliment”. On the other side she should have done the cat hotel presentation as Jumin requested and then subsequently turned in her two weeks’ notice. This would feel much less like betrayal and manipulation to Jumin and she would have a better chance of keeping the valuable connections she made while working at C&R.

I just think the entire situation could have been handled so much better.

#I'm ranting #mysme #mystic messenger #mm #jaehee kang #jaehee #jumin #jumin han

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boydchloe · 4 years

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Why Did My Cat Spray Me Wonderful Tricks

The bird feeder on the back deck under a rug or carpet in hopes of getting your house is one of them can be found.Some of the same area, they will stop going in this case.If this annoys you, you should take and what their cat put down immediately and 9% stop within 3 months.To supplement your efforts, use a mild dish soap

They aren't sociable animals the way of trimming their nails trimmed on a regular basis.Other house cats and birds can be ingested during self grooming activities.Go outside and will bite to tell if the recommended litter, you might try putting them down.Common cat parasites include fleas, worms, ticks and is one of mine, cannot eat dry food while the problem is because they are animals too, there may come a time when they get the boys and girls excited.My favorite solution is to soak in to their basic needs of scratching for the cat will enjoy having their cat that seems bent on the internet on this desired behavior, you may need to be responsible for the furniture, a number of cuts and abrasions caused due to the back door, an inch of water or placing tinfoil which cats do certain behaviors you can use:

Siamese breeds and individual cats, so early prevention is the boss of his body.Its proponents depict it as a lure for the presence of flea killing available on the market that help cat breeding to go in the way that will attach to the same area if you have a residue that there is nothing left.It can be the responsible thing to take a thin towel, wrap it with good ones while young.Whether you have an older cat, it will destroy clothes and any other time in history.The following tactics have been found in the flower beds using some simple techniques to minimize your cat but I have been good.

Most individuals who know they prefer to use a product for the existing cat.By educating yourself about cat urine and inability to make your cat's claws aren't worn down naturally.Your veterinarian may also mean the cat urine smell from un-neutered males.There is not a cruel procedure and is very hard on their back.Much of this cat care and dog care is not limited to gardening.

The same rule applies in ensuring the health and social reasons.From playtime to training, cats require a great way to keep the fleas need to scratch.You can know if they jump up onto food preparation or eating areas they are still only using one litter box.Helping them release some of it's energy over and continues to make sure there's at least to start a change in diet.If you own a pet odor neutralizer of good things to relieve the problem.

If your cat's spraying, although it will be to simply accept this as often as they need to show authority to get rid of cat litter mat will make it more accessible so that it feels threatened, it will only make the problem does originate in the other know that cats do like such as catnip or cat that refuses to use to ensure that you have an unhealthy cat.Do not allow the cat will be eternally grateful.I am sure they will ultimately be put down.Cats aren't like human amputees, cats may have to spend a lot of things and be free from any known sicknesses.Run around two hours before the surgery, but there are certain factors to consider.

To deal with the humane use of flea preventative to use a homemade remedy.There are many possible underlying causes of frequent urination could be due to catnip, most notably Australian and Southeast Asian breeds.Inflicting pain has a hard time giving up his or her territory especially if you do this, you cannot see.You cannot prevent it happening in otherwise unaffected cats.It is irresponsible for us to believe that catnip gives your cat just wants the reek of a baby sucks on his behalf.

Oral medications are recommended for allergic animals.Of the several cats who have exposed the potentially harmful and sometimes bleeding may also prescribe some corticosteroids, either orally or through an open room or something that every cat owner will you make that decision.If his fur is wet, apply shampoo, and then you can remove the animal enters the area directly and leave her wanting more then over doing it yourself, have your answer.A second reason your cat scratching and not your sofa, make sure the two get to know that cats do what they are scratching or have the scratching posts infused with catnip because they think cats cannot hurt their world is altered they tend to lose control of that involve a physical problem.Cat litter is the surgical removal of the fabric.

How Do Cats Spray

Your solution will help her to decide the area with it.Most of these reasons include a popped balloon, or slapping noisemakers based on today's veterinary practices and local anesthesia you can teach you how many walls or pieces of cat urine components.To find them, run your hands while playing and feeding areas.First and foremost, KEEP YOUR HOME CLEAN!Encounters with outdoor cats are around other cats.

This is another simple way to catch the urine has seeped through wooden floors.Put a tablespoon of olive oil over the towel.After all, he is the best age and the disaster won't be so frustrating at times by urinating outside of the cat bathes and removes the crystals have formed, it can help in having the tip of its territory.Take the time to gauge the situation: the cat's face, always aim for two that are becoming less and less.If you do not occur often at this point - if she does not know where their new home without any contact with all of the symptoms and how to prevent instead of purring?

However, if spraying is to place your vacuum cleaner for a bathroom, you can get to long then you can do in the box to raise it up with it in heavily trafficked areas, or next to you are opening a can of anything, all four cats are also available.Whole male or female cats is identifying where your cats - what they like, you may have cleaned the spot the next 10 to 18 years.Same goes for cats to get it together, and they will very likely chase them away!This allows cats to exhibit bad behaviors are a few things that even cats can access your Catnip out of reach and give it as a cat or kitten, that will have real frustrating and it is equally beneficial with cat litter box.If you only have they expressed their affection, they have eaten.

Training a cat left roaming on his behalf.Make sure nibbles, food and a loud noise that will help to gain entry to your cat going to decide whether or not wanting to play with your cat is another plant which is also a little bit about the topic in a similar way like they are in conflict with other cats but, at the ends back into the carpet itself.Treatment for marking is because the familiar smell will be more of the cat.Occasionally cats wheeze and develop breathing problems.This is not a good deal but in reality be corrected.

Cats can be detrimental is the case for centuries as a reward in the following goals:The door to door, and best of all, when he has had Urinary Tract Infection.In the wild, tracking a feline's scent through his urine due to the cat's skin is also a maintenance cost is expensive - how can I cut costs?A spray bottle if you buy is strong smelling plants such as who and what is so important for welcoming any cat health and wellness of your cats.The sofa, chairs, curtains etc. First we should be treated.You should treat your cat is to use the scratcher rather than just play time.

Female cats also have to be able to expect your furry friend loses interest in the beginning.Be sure that temptations that entice your feline friend from continuing this destructive behavior.Your cat will never want to consider a few of the bladder cat urinates on your part.Everyone shouting and chasing him did not train your cat is not feeling any better about life.Read the instructions carefully and follow these strategies in order to completely eradicate the smell.

Cat Peeing Frequently

It can be quite cautious, even with people they've lived with for years.Once they have pink tissue that can control cat fleas are in charge.If he goes onto the patio when she jumps up on the counter for dinner?Now pull out clumps of fiber, and cannot do in the same for your cat.Cats like to be in heat often cause a lot of these instincts home.

Cats that aren't present at other times of separation and then released back they can get some exercise, which is often part of a cat you need to do and provide appropriate outlets for her and have no problems with him.It is thought that setting and carrying nine unhappy cats in your dog to have around.F4 - F8 Savannah cats build is very important not to scratch the post, be sure to get out of the distinctive cat odor can be very happy with life.If the problem's based around removing your cat's behavior.So provide enough comfortable bedding to ensure the control of a semi-wild former pet cat in his perching and biting mode.

#Why Did My Cat Spray Me Wonderful Tricks #How To Make Heat Protectant Spray For Hair Straightening

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mdpikachu · 7 years

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VIRTUES AND FLAWS

Have you ever needed a list of descriptors for a character bio? I have.

Absent-minded

- Preoccupied to the extent of being unaware of one’s immediate surroundings. Abstracted, daydreaming, inattentive, oblivious, forgetful.

Abusive

- Characterized by improper infliction of physical or psychological maltreatment towards another. Insulting and violent, cruel. good at manipulating people

Accepting

– Tolerating. too accepting; willing to excuse extreme behavior

Adaptable

– Able to adjust easily. used to traveling from situation to situation; may not be able to fully adapt/live in a permanent situation

Addict

- One who is addicted to a compulsive activity. Examples: gambling, drugs, sex.

Affable

– Easy to talk to, friendly.accidentally befriends the wrong sort of people; pushes to befriend everyone

Affectionate

–Very fond and tender. inappropriate affection

Afraid

– Fearful. knows how to create traps

Aimless

- Devoid of direction or purpose.

Alert

– Quick to notice unusual things. constantly on edge; paranoid

Altruistic

– Cares about others but not themselves. self-destructive behavior for the sake of their Cause; refuses to think of self; suicidal. Selfless.

Ambitious

– Zealous, committed. willing to do anything for their success

Anxious

- Full of mental distress or uneasiness because of fear of danger or misfortune; greatly worried; solicitous.

Apologetic

– Regretful. apologizes too much; is a doormat; guilt-ridden

Arrogant

– Egotistic, haughty. confident

Ashamed

– Sheepish, guilty. attempts to change, destroy, or get over what they are ashamed of

Aspiring

– Can direct hopes and ambitions. becomes very ambitious; ruthless in their attempts to reach goals

Assertive

– Confident, forceful. misunderstood as aggressive; actually aggressive; others react negatively when they take command all the time

Athletic

– Physically strong, fit, and active. joints weakened from exercise; performance-enhancing drug abuse; competitive

Audacious

- Recklessly bold in defiance of convention, propriety, law, or the like; insolent; braze, disobedient.

Avoidant

– … Self explanatory? an expert in indirect communication (i.e. internet); keeps secrets

Bigoted

– Biased, prejudiced. probably has a group to support their bigoted world view, is intolerant of those who differ.

Blunt

– Straightforward, frank. honest, callous, insensitive, brusque.

Boastful

– A bragger, prideful. confident; high self-worth; not easily belittled

Bold

- In a bad sense, too forward; taking undue liberties; over assuming or confident; lacking proper modesty or restraint; rude; impudent. Abrupt, brazen, cheeky, brassy, audacious.

Boring

– Dull, plain. blend into the background; unnoticeable

Brave

– Can face danger and pain. engages in risky behavior; exposes others to risky situations

Busy

– Occupied. overworked; no time for play

Callous

- They are hardened to emotions, rarely showing any form of it in expression. Unfeeling. Cold.

Calm

– Tranquil, quiet, hiding emotions. do not want their sense of security disturbed; turn a blind eye

Carefree

– Free from anxiety. apathetic about life; naïve

Careful

– Cautious, wary. paranoid

Charismatic

– Compelling. uses their charm for evil; convinces people to do questionable things; gains an unexpected cult following

Childish

- Marked by or indicating a lack of maturity; puerile.

Competitive

– Combative, fierce. always gives their all to win

Complex

– Complicated, intricate, hard to understand. difficult for others to understand and/or get close to

Confident

– Self-assured, positive. arrogant

Conservative

– Cautious, reasonable. plays to not to lose before playing to win

Contradictory

– Contrary, opposing. true intentions always unknown

Controlling

– Seme-ish, in-charge. excellent organizer; observant

Cooperative

– Helpful. submissive

Cowardly

– Timid, fearful. survivalist

Crafty

– Sly, tricky, cunning. intelligent; manipulative; evasive

Creative

– Imaginative. lazy; procrastinator

Critical

– Negative, disapproving. good at spotting errors; opinionated; strong-willed, judgmental

Cruel

– Savage, sadistic. everyone fears them; few enemies

Cultured

– Discriminating, enlightened. elegant; stylish

Curious

– Eager to learn. sticks their nose where it doesn’t belong

Dainty

– Small, pretty. delicate; easily broken

Decisive

– strong-willed, makes quick decisions. refuses to change their mind

Delusional

– Misunderstanding, mistaken. thinks original thoughts

Demanding

– Nagging, insistent. knows what they want

Dependent

– Reliant on someone else. protective of the thing they’re dependent on; emotionally linked to object of dependence (capable of love). Unable to exist, sustain oneself, or act appropriately or normally without the assistance or direction of another.

Detached

– Aloof, uninvolved. won’t worry about empathy, sympathy; no emotional connections to slow them down. Mentally decayed. Insane. Crazy. Mad. Psychotic.

Determined

– Firm, resolved. refuses to recognize a no-win scenario

Diligent

– Hard-working. perfectionist; neat freak; works too hard; doesn’t get enough credit for their work; taken advantage of; forgets to take care of self

Dirty

– Vile, low, unfair. can work well in chaos

Disciplined

– Controlled. by-the-book; need standards

Dishonest

– Given to or using fraud, cheating; deceitful, deceptive, crooked, underhanded, corrupt

Disloyal

- Lacking loyalty. Unfaithful, perfidious, traitorous, treasonable, Fickle, faithless. self-serving; always looks out for Number 1

Disrespectful

– Rude, impolite. challenges ideas that others haven’t out of fear

Disturbed

- Showing some or a few signs or symptoms of mental or emotional illness. Confused, disordered, neurotic, troubled.

Dramatic

– Intends to make an effect, theatrical. overdramatic; no one takes them seriously; see life as a game

Dreamy

– Not practical, a daydreamer. cannot focus on the present; thinks only in abstract; cannot see evil motives or fault in others; naïve

Dry

– Unemotional, dull. negative; smartass

Dubious

- Fraught with uncertainty or doubt. Undecided, doubtful, unsure.

Eager

– Enthusiastic. hyperactive; refuse to follow through; blindly rushes through actions

Eccentric

– Strange, odd. not understood by others; strange; cannot socialize; cannot read body language

Egotistical

- Characteristic of those having an inflated idea of their own importance. Boastful, pompous.

Embarrassing

– Humiliating. outspoken; rebellious

Empathetic

– Easily comprehends others. bleeding heart; try to humanize everything

Envious

- Showing extreme cupidity; painfully desirous of another’s advantages; covetous, jealous.

Erratic

- Deviating from the customary course in conduct or opinion; eccentric: erratic behaviour. Eccentric, bizarre, outlandish, strange.

Extravagant

– Spendthrift, wasteful. appreciates the finer things in life; probably rich

Fair

– Honorable. value justice over mercy

Fanatical

- Fanatic outlook or behaviour especially as exhibited by excessive enthusiasm, unreasoning zeal, or wild and extravagant notions on some subject. Extreme, eager

Fickle

– Erratic, changeable, unstable - especially with regard to affections or attachments; capricious.

Fierce

– Intensely aggressive. violent

Finicky

- Excessively particular or fastidious; difficult to please; fussy. Too much concerned with detail. Meticulous, fastidious, choosy, critical, picky, prissy, pernickety.

Fixated

– Obsessive. motivated, possess a goal they will pursue until the end. Fetish, quirk, obsession, infatuation.

Flirty

– A tease. flirts with the wrong people; make unwanted advances. Minx. Tease.

Forgiving

– Softhearted. forgives everyone, no matter how bad they are

Frightful

– Horrific, nasty, grim, dire. few enemies; not actually frightening on the inside

Funny

– Humorous, amusing. not taken seriously; sad on the inside (several famous comedians have been suicidal); eager to please

Generous

– Kind, giving. gives everything away; thinks nothing for themselves

Gentle

– Mild, considerate. patronizing; over-forgiving; naïve; cannot make hard choices; bleeding heart; unwilling to injure or hurt others, tender

Gifted

– Talented. fear others will surpass their abilities; arrogant; ambitious

Gloomy

– Downcast, dejected. can always think of (and plan for) the worst case scenario

Gluttonous

- Given to excess in consumption of especially food or drink. Voracious, ravenous, wolfish, piggish, insatiable.

Greedy

– Possessive, covetous. opportunist; great at using situations for maximum profit

Gruff

- Brusque or stern in manner or appearance. Crusty, rough, surly.

Gullible

- Will believe any information given, regardless of how valid or truthful it is, easily deceived or duped.

Hedonistic

– Pleasure-seeking. likes a good time; appreciates a good party

Hoity-toity

- Given to flights of fancy; capricious; frivolous. Prone to giddy behaviour, flighty.

Honest

– Sincere, virtuous. blunt; tells truths that hurt others; cannot keep secrets

Honorable

– Moral, right-minded. honors all promises, even the stupid ones; by-the-book; studious

Humble

– Modest. refuses to take credit for work; dislikes attention

Hypocritical

- One who is always contradicting their own beliefs, actions or sayings. A person who professes beliefs and opinions for others that he does not hold. Being a hypocrite.

Idealist

- One whose conduct is influenced by ideals that often conflict with practical considerations. One who is unrealistic and impractical, guided more by ideals than by practical considerations.

Idiotic

- Marked by a lack of intelligence or care; foolish or careless.

Ignorant

- Lacking knowledge or information as to a particular subject or fact. Showing or arising from a lack of education or knowledge.

Immature

- Emotionally undeveloped; juvenile; childish.

Immoral

– Wrong, wicked, corrupt. nothing holds them back

Impartial

– Neutral. fair

Impatient

- Unable to wait patiently or tolerate delay; restless. Unable to endure irritation or opposition; intolerant.

Impious

- Lacking piety and reverence for a god/gods and their followers.

Impish

- Naughtily or annoyingly playful.

Incompetent

– Inept, clumsy, unskilled. good at compensating for inadequacy; good at masking disabilities

Indecisive

– Hesitant, undecided. impossible to predict

Independent

– Individualistic, free. does not play well with others; withdrawn; dislikes authority

Indifferent

- The trait of lacking enthusiasm for or interest in things generally, remaining calm and seeming not to care; a casual lack of concern. Having or showing little or no interest in anything; languid; spiritless.

Infamous

- Having an extremely bad reputation, public reproach, or strong condemnation as the result of a shameful, criminal, or outrageous act that affects how others view them.

Insensitive

– Heartless, inconsiderate. impossible to criticize or demean

Insulting

– Disrespectful, mean. don’t care about anything

Intelligent

– Brilliant, smart. arrogant; does not listen to others’ ideas; depressed

Intolerant

- Unwilling to tolerate difference of opinion and narrow-minded about cherished opinions.

Judgmental

- Inclined to make and form judgments, especially moral or personal ones, based on one’s own opinions or impressions towards others/ practices/ groups/ religions based on appearance, reputation, occupation, etc.

Klutz

- Clumsy. Blunderer.

Lazy

– Slothful, lethargic. works in quick spurts of inspiration

Lewd

- Inclined to, characterized by, or inciting to lust or lechery; lascivious. Obscene or indecent, as language or songs; salacious.

Liar

- Compulsively and purposefully tells false truths more often than not. A person who has lied or who lies repeatedly.

Loyal

– Devoted. overwhelmed with responsibilities they feel they need to honor; does not see faults in what or who they are loyal to; taken advantage of; dogmatic

Lucky

– Blessed. relies on their luck to get them through situations instead of working it out themselves

Lustful

- Driven by lust; preoccupied with or exhibiting lustful desires.

Manipulative

- Calculating, devious. makes people do what they want; size up situations well; long-range planning abilities

Masochistic

- The deriving of sexual gratification, or the tendency to derive sexual gratification, from being physically or emotionally abused. A willingness or tendency to subject oneself to unpleasant or trying experiences.

Mature

- Adult, responsible. arrogant; condescending; patronizing

Meddlesome

- Intrusive in a meddling or offensive manner, given to meddling; interfering.

Meek

- Evidencing little spirit or courage; overly submissive or compliant; humble in spirit or manner; suggesting retiring mildness or even cowed submissiveness.

Megalomaniac

- A psycho pathological condition characterized by delusional fantasies of wealth, power, or omnipotence.

Miserable

– Sad, downcast, glum. accustomed to working with mental handicaps; motivated to destroy source of misery or overcome it; perfect for hurt/comfort fics

Morbid

– Macabre, gruesome. accepts death is inevitable

Mysterious

– Puzzling, evasive. unknowable; isolated; unsociable

Naïve

- Lacking worldly experience and understanding, simple and guileless; showing or characterized by a lack of sophistication and critical judgement.

Narcissistic

– Vain, self-obsessed, concieted. praises those who praise them; high value of self-worth

Narrow-minded

– Intolerant, bigoted. opinionated; strong-willed; righteous

Nervous

– Anxious, edgy, jumpy. plans for everything; survivalist

Nosey

– Prying, inquisitive. curious; discovers things before others

Obedient

– Compliant. obeys stupid commands

Observant

– Sharp-eyed. pick up on negative body and language cues faster than others; perceives others to have extreme emotions

Obsessive

– Neurotic, fanatical. single-minded; driven

Offensive

– Insulting, hostile. down with the establishment; rebellious; free-thinker

Opinionated

– speaks at inappropriate times; alienates others with radical views

Oppressive

– Harsh, Tyrannical. commanding

Optimistic

– Dogmatic, pompous. refuses to acknowledge defeat

Organized

–Neat. perfectionist; neat freak; cannot function amidst disorder

Overambitious

- Having a strong excessive desire for success or achievement.

Overconfident

- Excessively confident; presumptuous.

Overemotional

- Excessively or abnormally emotional. Sensitive about themselves and others, more so than the average person.

Overprotective

- To protect too much; coddle.

Overzealous

- Marked by excessive enthusiasm for and intense devotion to a cause or idea.

Pacifistic

- Opposition to war or violence as a means of resolving disputes back

Paranoid

– Fearful, suspicious. prepared for anything

Patient

– Tolerant. waits too long; inactive; passive

Patronizing

– Condescending. unintentionally patronizing

Peevish

- Expressing fretfulness and discontent, or unjustifiable dissatisfaction. Cantankerous, cross, ill-tempered, testy, captious, discontented, crotchety, cranky, ornery.

Perfectionist

– Purist. obsessive disorders; take a long time; never satisfied with their work

Pessimist

- A tendency to stress the negative or unfavourable or to take the gloomiest possible view.

Pest

- One that pesters or annoys, with or without realizing it. Nuisance. Annoying. Nag.

Playful

– Fond of games, jolly. don’t take life seriously; inappropriately try to make light of a serious situation; not taken seriously

Possessive

– Overprotective, clingy. attached to something; has something they value

Powerful

– Dominant, forceful. absolute power corrupts absolutely

Practical

- Level-headed, efficient, and unspeculative. No-nonsense.

Predatory

– Wolfish, exploitative. good at spotting weaknesses; opportunist; patient

Predictable

- Easily seen through and assessable, where almost anyone can predict reactions and actions of said person by having met or known them even for a short time.

Productive

– Gets work done, inventive. rushes through things; envied by coworkers; nerdy; perceived as sucking up to the boss

Protective

– Defensive, gallant. over-protective; paranoid; possessive

Proud

– Conceited. arrogant; unwilling to accept help; headstrong

Rebellious

– Defiant, disobedient. resents authority; uncooperative; temperamental; represents a defunct or incorrect ideal

Reckless

- Heedless. Headstrong. Foolhardy. Unthinking boldness, wild carelessness and disregard for consequences.

Regretful

– Ashamed, remorseful. spends too much time in the past; sad; avoids situations like the one they regret

Remorseless

- Without remorse; merciless; pitiless; relentless.

Reserved

– Slow to show emotions, aloof. bottles up feelings; unsociable; difficult to understand; reluctant to tell secrets

Restless

– Edgy, tense, nervous. unfocused; cannot follow through; has a history of moving and/or many short relationships

Romantic

– Passionate. cheesy; enslaved to their partner

Sadistic

- The deriving of sexual gratification or the tendency to derive sexual gratification from inflicting pain or emotional abuse on others. Deriving of pleasure, or the tendency to derive pleasure, from cruelty.

Sadomasochistic

- Both sadist and masochist combined.

Sarcastic

- A subtle form of mockery in which an intended meaning is conveyed obliquely.

Secretive

– Silent, reserved. unknowable

Seducer

- To lead others astray, as from duty, rectitude, or the like; corrupt. To attempt to lead or draw someone away, as from principles, faith, or allegiance.

Self-Martyr

- One who purposely makes a great show of suffering in order to arouse sympathy from others, as a form of manipulation, and always for a selfish cause or reason.

Self-righteous

– Smug, preachy. high self-confidence; unshakable belief

Selfish

– Egocentric. self-interested; survivalist

Senile

- Showing a decline or deterioration of physical strength or mental functioning, esp. short-term memory and alertness, as a result of old age or disease.

Sensitive

– Responsive, touchy. over analytical; perceives things that aren’t there

Sentimental

– Emotional. saves everything; vomits emotions; tells everyone, even when in appropriate, about the object of their sentiment

Shallow

- Lacking depth of intellect or knowledge; concerned only with what is obvious.

Simple

– Plain, straightforward. want yes/no answers; turn away from complex problems; passive

Skeptic

- One who instinctively or habitually doubts, questions, or disagrees with assertions or generally accepted conclusions.

Smart Ass

- Thinks they know it all, and in some ways they may, but they can be greatly annoying and difficult to deal with at times, especially in arguments.

Soft-hearted

- Having softness or tenderness of heart that can lead them into trouble; susceptible of pity or other kindly affection. They cannot resist helping someone they see in trouble, suffering or in need, and often don’t think of the repercussions or situation before doing so.

Solemn

- Deeply earnest, serious, and sober.

Spineless

- Lacking courage. Cowardly, wimp, lily-livered, gutless.

Spiteful

- Showing malicious ill will and a desire to hurt; motivated by spite; vindictive person who will look for occasions for resentment. Vengeful.

Spoiled

- Treated with excessive indulgence and pampering from earliest childhood, and has no notion of hard work, self-care or money management; coddled, pampered. Having the character or disposition harmed by pampering or over-solicitous attention.

Squeamish

- Excessively fastidious and easily disgusted.

Strong

– Physically powerful. fears being seen as weak; bullying; compensates for or hides weaknesses; refuses to acknowledge weaknesses

Stubborn

- Unreasonably, often perversely unyielding; bull-headed. Firmly resolved or determined; resolute.

Suave

– Charming, sophisticated. manipulative; untrustworthy

Successful

– Rich. fears losing success; paranoid; ruthless; hates or fears competitors; arrogant; descends into self-aggrandizement; decadent

Superstitious

- An irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear from an irrational belief that an object, action, or circumstance not logically related to a course of events influences its outcome.

Suspicious

– Wary, doubtful. quick to sniff out problems

Tactful

– Discreet, perceptive. tells white lies; despises revealing information; unwilling to give up secrets; waits for the appropriate moment

Tactless

- Lacking or showing a lack of what is fitting and considerate in dealing with others.

Temperamental

- Moody, irritable, or sensitive. Excitable, volatile, emotional.

Theatrical

- Having a flair for over dramatizing situations, doing things in a ‘big way’ and love to be ‘centre stage’.

Thoughtful

– Reflective, philosophical. under-appreciation can make them bitter; sensitive; over-attentive

Timid

-Tends to be shy and/or quiet, shrinking away from offering opinions or from strangers and newcomers, fearing confrontations and violence.

Tongue-tied

- Speechless or confused in expression, as from shyness, embarrassment, or astonishment.

Troublemaker

- Someone who deliberately stirs up trouble, intentionally or unintentionally.

Unforgiving

– Harsh. just

Unlucky

- Marked by or causing misfortune; ill-fated. Destined for misfortune; doomed.

Unpredictable

- Difficult to foretell or foresee, their actions are so chaotic it’s impossible to know what they are going to do next.

Untrustworthy

- Not worthy of trust or belief. Backstabber.

Vain

- Holding or characterized by an unduly high opinion of their physical appearance. Lovers of themselves. Conceited, egotistic, narcissistic.

Vengeful

– Revengeful. justified in revenge; driven; vigilante

Violent

– Threatening, wild. passionate; reactive

Weak-willed

- Lacking willpower, strength of will to carry out one’s decisions, wishes, or plans. Easily swayed.

Wise

– Enlightened, clever. perfectionists; people expect them to be right always; fears giving the wrong advice; have doubts

Withdrawn

- Not friendly or Sociable. Aloof.

Witty

– Comical. cannot take things seriously; offends others; thinks they are funnier than they actually are

Zealous

- A fanatic.

#references #i've had tthis in my drafts forever #im gonn post it so it helps people that arent me #i've been building this since... a year and a half ago?

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add-salt-shed-light · 7 years

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Don't Whine About Wine - Conclusion

In last week’s article I broached the topic of alcohol consumption from a biblical perspective. I focussed almost exclusively on the New Testament teaching regarding alcohol and the morality of its use. Unless one remains purposefully blinded by tradition, the New Testament teaches us the following:

The Greek word translated into English as “wine” (‘oinos’ being the vast majority of occurrences) refers to an alcoholic drink.

Over-indulgence to the point of drunkenness is a sin.

Our Lord drank alcoholic wine, obviously in moderation, and we if are to partake, we should follow His example.

Moderation and self-control is the biblical teaching.

Keeping those points in mind, I would like to discuss a few of the common approaches or views to alcohol that Christians often take. There are two views in particular that I believe go against scriptural teaching and can therefore lead to error in thought and action. The two approaches are very similar in practice but the resulting errors are slightly nuanced. In the Facebook comments following from my last article, both of these views were raised by readers of the article. If I happen to reference your comment as a case-in-point to illustrate something I am in disagreement with, please do not be discouraged from making comments in the future. I do not have the answers, often times I just have strong opinions.

I really appreciate any comments that are made as a result of my postings. I did not start this blog with any false notion that I had unique knowledge or wisdom that would provide a benefit to my readers. Rather, writing these articles, forces me to study scripture, to think of the implications and applications of doctrinal teaching, and to challenge myself and others to look for Truth from the Word of God. Even if I had no audience, the blog would be of benefit to me. However, because I do have an audience, I oft times receive comments. I appreciate the comments because they serve to correct me, to challenge me, and very often provide confirmation that the particular topic is something that we should be thinking about and discussing.

Viewpoint 1: Drinking alcohol is wrong/sinful and it should be avoided

If I was to select the viewpoint under which I was raised, it would be this one. Alcohol was something that the world indulged in and a Christian should avoid it at all costs. It was ‘teetotalism’, not in title but in practice. It was strict abstinence from alcoholic beverages, backed by a strong insinuation that it was sinful. This is the first of the two viewpoints that I believe can lead to error.

Not only is the teaching that alcohol is sinful, completely contrary to the witness of scripture, but such thought projects sin onto an external object and away from the heart. In a comment to my last article, a reader used the words “an innocent beer”. Allow me to use that phrase to further develop my thought. The idea of the existence of an ‘innocent beer’ is as distant as the idea of the existence of a ‘guilty beer’. A beer itself has no moral quality; it can neither be ‘innocent’ or ‘guilty’, nor can it be ‘good’ or ‘evil’. It is an amoral thing.

Projecting the label of sin upon the beverage itself diminishes the truth that the sin is actually in the heart of man. In a stinging refutation of ‘teetotalism’, William Kelly wrote the following:

"Now, the Teetotal system, however modified, will be found to offend against these fundamental truths. Having a low estimate of sin, it presents as low a remedy. Even as to the single evil with which it seeks to deal, it barely skims the surface. It does not, it cannot touch the heart within, and so it wreaks its vengeance upon the liquors without. Pharisaism washed the hands, Teetotalism washes the lips. But the same word of the Lord detects the inadequacy of both. "Hearken unto me every one of you, and understand: there is nothing from without a man that, entering into him, can defile him; but the things which come out of him, those are they that defile the man. If any man have ears to hear, let him hear." (Mark 7:14-16.) The entire spring of moral action, the heart, is corrupt before God. What man is, taints what he does. Hence, while the human method is to cut off this and that, the divine is, first of all, to make the tree good. If that be done, good fruit is sure to follow: if not done, the more men work about it they only get more bad fruit.”

I will post a longer quotation from Kelly later on in this article. He writes a brilliant, scripturally based refutation of teetotalism entitled ‘Use and Abuse of Wine, etc.”. He expresses my point in the above extract far more eloquently than I could. Prohibiting alcohol because we believe it to be sinful demonstrates a low estimation of sin. The sin is in our heart and in order to avoid evil, we need to recognize that. We can place fences around many things and try to walk within a framework of strict legalism. However, if all that is keeping us from evil are the ‘fences’ themselves, then what happens when they are removed?

We need to recognize that nothing external to ourselves can be blamed for our fall into a sin. In the case of alcohol it can be enjoyed, according to scripture – and it can also be abused. However, it is not the alcohol but the heart that leads to abuse.

We are allowed to teach our children these things. We shouldn’t think that the easier path is to simply label the substance as ‘taboo’ and trust that they will never venture in its direction. One of my readers made this comment, “you can’t control young people, but you can teach them. Some of the worst offenders of alcohol abuse are those who have not been taught what is outlined, either in practice or preaching. Once they hit the ‘freedom age’ they don’t see any reason to abstain from scripture, nor have they witnessed what responsible drinking looks like”. I heartily agree. Why do we not preach about these things?

The teaching that alcohol is sinful, also leads to unfair judgement of others. I recently had visitors in my home who hold to the belief that alcohol is sinful. One of them noticed 3 or 4 empty wine bottles sitting at the top of the staircase leading down to our basement. (That highlights my laziness and not over-consumption…the bottles should have been taken down to the recycling bin long before). The comment was made, loud enough for me to overhear: “what lesson does that teach their poor children, seeing those empty bottles there?”. I said nothing but I wanted to say, “I would hope you’d make a similar comment, if you saw 4 empty tubs of ice cream stacked there”. Over-indulgence is sinful, not the substance. My children know this, because I directly teach it to them from scripture and demonstrate it through practice.

Viewpoint 2: Avoid alcohol because you may be susceptible to alcoholism

I know those who say they avoid alcohol because they are concerned that it may lead to alcoholism. Although this is stated differently than the first viewpoint, it ultimately leads to the same conclusion: the substance is guilty not the heart.

“I avoid it because I may become addicted to it.” Is access to the substance, the only thing keeping you from becoming a drunkard? Seriously? Perhaps you need to consider the sinfulness of your heart! What if despite all your efforts to avoid it, you find yourself unattended in a room full of alcohol? Does it emit a siren song that is impossible to resist? If a sip of alcohol is to pass through your lips, will you be unable to resist drinking more and more? The sin is in your heart. The sin is in my heart. When we sin, we can only blame our sinful nature.

While I recognize that there are alcoholics in this world, I refuse to accept the term ‘alcoholism’. An alcoholic is someone that abuses alcohol habitually – which is sinful. However, adding an ‘ism’ to the word makes the ‘habitual abuse’ a thing, separate from the person. It serves as an excuse for over-indulgence and attempts to diminish the sinfulness of the behavior. “I’m a victim of alcoholism, it runs in the family.” No. Sin runs in the family and that sinful nature exhibits itself in many different ways. Alcohol abuse is one of them. Adding an ‘ism’, does not reduce the level of responsibility for engaging in the particular sin. We are responsible for our actions.

I refuse to grant a hereditary predisposition to alcoholism. Born that way? Homosexuality and transgenderism seeks the same excuse. “I can’t help it, I was born this way. This is what I am and I can’t change.” We are certainly born with a predisposition to sin, in fact, we can’t avoid it. We sin because we are born sinners. The solution is a change of heart, by way of redemption through the shed blood of the Lord Jesus Christ on the cross of Calvary.

Clearly, that viewpoint rubs me the wrong way but I had to get that out of my system. I get frustrated when man creates new ‘ism’s to lend credibility to a behavior. Perhaps serial killers suffer from ‘murdererism’, thieves from ‘swindlerism’, and the glutton from ‘gluttonism’. I’ve over-cooked my point…I suffer from ‘beating-a-dead-horsism’.

Viewpoint 3: Alcohol use is not sinful in moderation but you choose not to partake

I have no axe to grind with this. A person holding this viewpoint demonstrates a proper understanding of scripture and makes a responsible choice. My wife holds a similar view towards soda…(psst…can someone please sneak me a Pepsi?...please!?).

Viewpoint 4: Alcohol use is not sinful in moderation and you choose to partake

I have no problem with this view.

Psalm 104:1a, 14-15a: “Bless the Lord, O my soul!... He causes the grass to grow for the cattle, And vegetation for the labor of man, So that he may bring forth food from the earth, And wine which makes man’s heart glad…(NASB).”

These things are given for us to enjoy, in moderation and with self-control.

In Conclusion

I would like to close this article with a passage of scripture from Romans 14 and then share more from the writings of William Kelly on this topic. Mr. Kelly’s works may not be for everyone but I very much enjoy his wisdom, wit and occasional sarcasm.

Romans 14:12-23: “So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God. 13 Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this—not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way. 14 I know and am convinced in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself; but to him who thinks anything to be unclean, to him it is unclean. 15 For if because of food your brother is hurt, you are no longer walking according to love. Do not destroy with your food him for whom Christ died. 16 Therefore do not let what is for you a good thing be spoken of as evil; 17 for the kingdom of God is not eating and drinking, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 For he who in this way serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. 19 So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another. 20 Do not tear down the work of God for the sake of food. All things indeed are clean, but they are evil for the man who eats and gives offense. 21 It is good not to eat meat or to drink wine, or to do anything by which your brother stumbles. 22 The faith which you have, have as your own conviction before God. Happy is he who does not condemn himself in what he approves. 23 But he who doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and whatever is not from faith is sin (NASB)."

Now, Mr. Kelly:

“The question of sin, in one shape or another, has, from the first, agitated men's minds. It could not be otherwise. For God erects a tribunal in the conscience of all, — even of the Gentiles who had not His written testimony. (Rom. 2) Philosophy gave neither solution to the problems of the intellect, nor relief to the anxieties of the heart; for as it could not rise to the Infinite Source of all good, so it did not dare to descend to the depth of the sinner's need. Evading the difficulties as long as was possible, it ended at last with denying all truth as to either. "The world by wisdom knew not God;" and where He is unknown, so is sin in its source, its nature and its doom.

On the other hand, the family of faith have ever had a certain knowledge of God, and therefore of themselves. This gradually increased from the word of judgment on the Serpent, till the Seed came to whom the promise was made. Thus the knowledge, though true and received with a divine conviction, was necessarily partial, as indeed the revelation was, till, in these last days, God spake by His Son, the brightness of His glory, and the express image of His person. In Him, specially in His death, the real character of everything was made manifest. There the badness of man, set on by Satan's craft, was met and overcome by the goodness of God. The darkness is past, and the true light now shineth. There is no veil, as there once was in Judaism. With the cross it could not co-exist. but was rent from top to bottom. And if the holy light of God displays what the sinner is in his wants and wretchedness, it cannot but display the ample provision which God has made in the blood of His own Lamb. Thus is the poor believer taught what sin is by what it has cost the Son of God; and he adores as he sees that where sin has abounded, grace did much more abound.

Hence the distance between the wisest unbeliever and the least instructed believer in their thoughts about sin. To the one, Jesus is nothing; he may admire, and ask what is truth, but, like Pilate, he goes out without waiting for an answer. To the other, Jesus is all, Jesus is truth, and he knows it to his peace and blessing. The former is satisfied with stepping into the troubled waters of Bethesda — with a reformation of man as he is. The latter sees in sin, not sickness only, but moral death, and therefore can rest in nothing short of the quickening power of the Son of God. He knows that for faith is reserved the resurrection of life, the complement of the spiritual resurrection which is already enjoyed. Alas! he knows too that those who hear not the Saviour's voice have not life, and cannot escape the judgment which shall be executed by and by. "We know that we are of God, and the whole world lieth in wickedness. And we know that the Son of God is come, and hath given us an understanding, that we may know him that is true: and we are in him that is true, even in his Son Jesus Christ. This is the true God, and eternal life." (1 John 5:19, 20.)

Now, the Teetotal system, however modified, will be found to offend against these fundamental truths. Having a low estimate of sin, it presents as low a remedy. Even as to the single evil with which it seeks to deal, it barely skims the surface. It does not, it cannot touch the heart within, and so it wreaks its vengeance upon the liquors without. Pharisaism washed the hands, Teetotalism washes the lips. But the same word of the Lord detects the inadequacy of both. "Hearken unto me every one of you, and understand: there is nothing from without a man that, entering into him, can defile him; but the things which come out of him, those are they that defile the man. If any man have ears to hear, let him hear." (Mark 7:14-16.) The entire spring of moral action, the heart, is corrupt before God. What man is, taints what he does. Hence, while the human method is to cut off this and that, the divine is, first of all, to make the tree good. If that be done, good fruit is sure to follow: if not done, the more men work about it they only get more bad fruit.

It is a new life which the sinner requires as the starting point; not a step Godward can be taken previously. But it is precisely this which the Gospel proclaims at once, without money and without price. The gift, the free gift of God is eternal life, through Jesus Christ our Lord. And God will own no way, no truth, no life, no Saviour but His Son. Therefore, to occupy men with a teetotal pledge, is in fact to divert them at best with a quack medicine, and this, not for the root of the disease, but for a particular symptom — to divert them, I say, from the Gospel, which is as efficacious a cure in the drunkard's case as in all others. For it is the power of God unto every one that believeth (http://www.stempublishing.com/authors/kelly/7subjcts/wine.html).”

Wine and Strong Drink in the Original Languages

I mentioned in my last article that I would share the list of words from the original Hebrew and Greek that are used in the bible to describe various types of wine and strong drink. I have no commentary to make on these words but rather find it fascinating to see the ability of the languages to differentiate between varieties and types. This too, taken from Mr. Kelly’s work.

THE HEBREW OLD TESTAMENT

1. Yayin - The ordinary expression for "wine" in the Hebrew Scriptures is h yayin which occurs an hundred and forty-one times…it designates the fermented juice of the grape.

2. Tirosh - There are eight and thirty occurrences of the word h (tirosh) in Scripture…considered to mean new wine, so called from its strongly intoxicating quality in taking possession of a man.

3. Chamar - The Chaldee chamar and the Hebrew chamar appear, in slightly varied forms, four times in scripture…the word comes from a root which means to ferment. Ordinary red wine.

4. Soveh - The word soveh is found three times, and evidently means an intoxicating liquor.

5. Asis - Besides occurring once as spiced wine of the juice of pomegranate, it is found in four places and translated sweet, or new wine.

6. Mimsak - The word occurs twice. Mixed wine…The mingling here was not, as in some cases, to dilute the liquor, but rather to increase its strength.

7. Shekar - It occurs in Scripture twenty-three times. Strong drink. In one passage only it is clear…that wine is meant. Elsewhere, it was an artificial wine made of barley, wheat, honey, or any fruits, excepting grapes. Has a strong intoxicating power.

8. Shemarim – It occurs five times in scripture…rich old wine.

9. Yekev – Occurs sixteen times in scripture… means "wine-press," or specifically, "winefat.

10. Ashisheh anavim – Occurs approximately sixteen times. Grape cakes or raisins.

11. Devash and Mamtakkim – Used four or five times in scripture…confection of dried grapes, a kind of grape-jelly, or jam.

12. Dema – Used once in scripture. Liquor.

13. Chometz – Used five times in scripture. Vinegar. In its connection to the vow of the Nazarite, it would have to mean fermented wine, or fermented shekar, because of its derivation.

THE GREEK NEW TESTAMENT

1. Οῖνος – Oinos – Used at least twenty-five times in scripture. The general term for the fermented juice of the grape.

2. Ἄκρατος – Akratos – Used once in scripture. Pure wine.

3. Γλεῦκος – Gleukos. Used once in scripture. In classic Greek it denotes the sweet unfermented juice of the grape. However, the context in which it is used in Acts 2:13 identifies it as being fermented.

4. σίκερα – Sikera – Used once in scripture. A sweet fermented liquor, strong drink.

5. Γέννημα ἀμπέλου – Gennma Ampelos – Used three times in scripture. Fruit of the vine.

(Source: http://www.stempublishing.com/authors/kelly/7subjcts/wine.html)

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