#atom and his package

[gerogerigaogaigar]

Alright here are ten more albums. These ones are just my personal picks. Some that you prolly don't know and some you definitely do. I think you should listen to all of them because I like them a lot and if you don't like them then I promise I will cry a little.

Lemon Demon - Spirit Phone

Okay so I know that half of you just checked out because this is a 'meme album' and you simply will not take me seriously no matter what but honestly if that's you then go fuck yourself. Anyway Neil Cicierega is an internet fixture. He has brought us animutation, The Ultimate Showdown Of Ultimate Destiny, Mouth Sounds, Potter Puppet Pals, Brodyquest, Ariel Needs Legs, and probably a lot of other things I'm forgetting. So it isn't really a surprise that his first full album under the Lemon Demon moniker in a decade went down as a piece of weird internet errata as well. The thing is, Spirit Phone is a fucking masterpiece.

The subject matter is the occult, conspiracy theories, urban legends, aliens, cryptids, and conservatives. Nothing too weird, but the way he tackles these subjects is. Let's take Cabinet Man for example, it plays on the urban legend of the haunted arcade cabinet Polybius. But Cabinet Man is told from the point of view of the machine itself. It's about a man who turns himself into an arcade cabinet and about his life as an arcade cabinet. The very next track, No Eyed Girl, is a doo wop styled love song written to a lovecraftian horror. And yes this is all very Quirky™ but Cicierega never wink at the camera, he never lets on that this is a joke. Just like unironically here's a song about sexualizing (even if he insists it isn't sexual) eating mummies. Why not? The frenetic pacing always keeps you off balance too so there is no way to get used to the weirdness other than to let yourself be subsumed by it.

"But wait!" I hear you saying "what was that thing about conservatism? What does that have to do with the occult?" I'm glad you asked because I think the funniest thing this album does is deliver three songs in a row that have nothing to do with the rest of the album's main themes. As Your Father I Expressly Forbid It, I Earned My Life, and Reaganomics all satirize American boomer conservatism. I think putting them there after all the conspiracy theory stuff is brilliant. The paranoid, surreal attitudes of the first half of the album contrasted against the equally paranoid and surreal attitudes of conservatives. Finally I just want to mention my number one favorite thing about this album and it's that I Earned My Life is written in the style of Paul Simon's Graceland. That makes me laugh. What an effortless takedown of a legendary artist and album.

Ween - The Mollusk

Ween are a pretty weird band. And my standards for what counts as weird are pretty high. So the fact that their least weird album is this nautically themed psychedelic hellscape isn't saying much. The Mollusk sounds how low tide smells. The album is like the rhyme of the ancient mariner but the albatross is replaced by hundreds of barnacles. It is a decaying mess, but it's also jaunty and fun. Purely stupid nonsense like Waving My Dick In The Wind and Dancing In The Show Tonight are placed side by side with the intense and horror tinged Golden Eel and Mutilated Lips.

Musically Ween are uncharacteristically cohesive. Sure they run the gamut of genres from intense proggy numbers to punk and alternative rock and some showtunesy stuff, but it's all mastered as wet as possible. By the way y'all know when I say a sound is wet I mean heavily processed as opposed to dry which is raw unprocessed audio right? There is copious reverb, chorus and especially phasing on every song until they all sound like waves crashing against a rock.

Perhaps the weirdest thing about The Mollusk is that it is, I think at least, the only Ween album to contain a straight cover. Cold Blows The Wind is just a folk song that Gener and Deaner just play dead straight. That is very unusual for a band that prefers to vaguely mock artists or styles rather than just do them. Of course that track is immediately followed by a song called Pink Eye On My Leg so don't take these guys seriously for too long.

Atom And His Package - A Society Of People Named Elihu

There is no other album that feels more like an inside joke among high schoolers that you aren't privy to the context for. Adam Goren repeatedly name drops his friends and talks about things very specific to his life. The album is a mess of unfettered id where no concept is dwelt on for very long and no hesitation is given before launching into something completely unrelated. The very first track contemplates a hypothetical Punk Rock Academy before losing track of itself and barreling full throttle into an interpolation of Eddie Money's Take Me Home Tonight. This kind of thing happens a lot. Me And My Black Metal friends interpolated Dexys Midnight Runners' hit Come On Eileen for no apparent reason other than that is what started going through Goren's head at the time. This album has three different birthday songs on it, the first of which has the refrain "Happy Birthday Ralph, I love you, even though you are fucking disgusting." Who is Ralph? You aren't asking the right questions.

Oh yeah and this album is entirely just a guy singing over a drum machine and keyboard. But it's also kind of a punk rock album. Atom And His Package don't sound super punk at first glance, but he has the ethos. And structurally, well there's a little more punk rock in here than you might expect. I'll stand by A Society Of People Named Elihu as a punk rock album because it's funny and I think that is what Adam Goren would want.

TV On The Radio - Return To Cookie Mountain

There's a lot of art rock out there that I'm totally in love with. But TV On The Radio are on a different level. They are extremely catchy, but also different than anything else around them. They exist somewhere in between 00s post punk revival and, uh honestly I don't know. I thought something would come to me as I was typing this. There is nothing to compare the unique use of drums and percussion to create both rhythmic and textural elements while the bass guitar makes up the majority of the melody. The members of the band all harmonize beautifully on vocals and when you break the songs down you find just a few instruments being layered into a looping, spiraling current of sound. A Method and Dirtywhirl especially sound like they are physically spiralling. They use looped percussion and bass, repetitive singsong vocals, and thrumming rhythms to create a completely unique sonic landscape that is both overwhelming and extremely addictive. It is too easy for me to finish this album and then put it back on again because there is nothing else that scratches the itch this album gives me.

Between The Buried And Me - Colors

I don't usually like to be this absolute, but Colors is my favorite metal album. Between The Buried And Me are consistently amazing but Colors is the best showcase of their range and fluidity with which they traverse various styles. At a base level Colors is a progressive metalcore album, a genre which has probably just turned a few people off of listening. But if you aren't usually into metalcore don't fear there is a lot more going on here than bad screaming and bad chugging. No BTBAM weave together intense thrash like riffing, high speed guitar solos, intense screaming, melodic jazzy solos, chromatic breakdowns, catchy clean vocal segments and frequent tempo changes with an artistry and ease that makes it hard to notice when the style does an abrupt change. Every linking segment is so natural that the tech death screams in Sun Of Nothing will transition to the melodic refrain without any sense of tonal dissonance. Even when you hit the end of Ants Of The Sky and hear them go into a full bluegrass hoedown it is just completely natural. No other album makes 10+ minute songs go by so fast. There are so many hour long metal albums out there that drag on for the sake of length alone and Colors just shits in their faces and proves that you can go on for an hour and keep an audience completely engaged the whole time.

They Might Be Giants - Lincoln

They Might Be Giants are a never ending supply of witty turns of phrase. Some are seemingly nonsequiturs like "tour the world in a heavy metal band / but they run out of gas the plane can never land" others are clever "which one of us is the one we can't trust / you say that I think it's you but I don't agree with that" and others seem like nonsense but probably mean something deeper if you just stop and think about it "how sleepless is the egg knowing that which throws the stone foresees the bone, the bone, our only home is bone". They will get at some wild themes lyrically while still maintaining an upbeat sound. That weird tonal gap is what makes songs like I've Got A Match and They'll Need A Crane into more than just songs about bad relationships. It helps obfuscate the actually bleakness of Lie Still Little Bottle, a song about being addicted to uppers. And it leaves you wondering about the seemingly pure goofy songs like Shoehorn With Teeth and Cowtown. Also you might be interested to know that Where Your Eyes Don't Go is a favorite song of local Tumblr Celebrity™ Neil Gaiman. So there's your seal of approval if you needed one.

Macintosh Plus - Floral Shoppe

Vaporwave is such a beautiful genre. It is a musical consomme where other songs are melted down until there is nothing left but the essence of the original piece. A distinctly recognizable flavor, but rendered into broth. The idea of taking a song and picking out very specific bits and then slowing them down repeating them over and over until you have turned the ten second sample into a five minute song is incredible.

Floral Shoppe is not the first, and maybe not even the best vaporwave record, but it is the blueprint that a lot of artists would seek to imitate. The track リサフランク420 / 現代のコンピュー (Lisa Frank 420 / modern computing) made some waves for having a very overt and recognizable sample and leading to people joking that the genre was just "Diana Ross slowed down". And derogatory as that sounds it is also true. The song is seven minutes of just the chorus of Diana Ross' It's Your Move looped, slowed down, and otherwise abused until it just isn't the same song anymore. What Floral Shoppe did was bring the idea of the transformative property of context to a wider audience. The question of authorship is essential to vaporwave. Most vaporwave artists will use one off monikers for albums. In fact Macintosh Plus is a one off project under the larger Vektroid umbrella. Vektroid herself is one of the most prolific and significant vaporwave artists out there and honestly I don't even think Floral Shoppe is her best work, but it is the most important.

But is it good? That's the real question. The philosophical implications of art are nice and all but is it good to listen to? Yeah it's extremely enjoyable. Listening to Floral Shoppe is like living in a slightly fucked up betamac tape that is playing commercials for new shopping malls. It captures a sense of nostalgia, but also warps it into a surreal dreamscape. Parts stutter, they loop just before the part of the song you know plays, they are repeated over and over until you feel like something is wrong. The nostalgia is recontextualized as something artificial. Like it is reminding you that the way you feel about the past is manufactured. Your memories are already corrupted by capitalism and if you could see through the matrix you would hear the broken mechanisms underneath.

The Field - From Here We Go Sublime

The Field is hard to pin down. While basically a tech-house project it is also quite a bit unlike other tech-house/minimal/ambient techno projects. I was enthralled the first time I ever put on this record. There's something ethereal about the heavily altered vocal samples. Every sound rendered distant and breathy. This is the sound of the sun glaring off of fresh snow in the winter. This is the sound that plays when you transcend your human body to become a being of pure energy. If the obelisk from 2001 A Space Odyssey was a DJ this is what it would play. It is impossible to not feel subsumed by this music, to want to just close your eyes and imagine you are floating. From Here We Go Sublime is one of the prettiest albums I have ever heard and I think even people who aren't into techno might be able to appreciate it.

The Streets - A Grand Don't Come For Free

Look me in the eye. I'm serious look at me. Mike Skinner is a good rapper. No I'm not joking. No I don't like this album "ironically". A Grand Don't Come For Free is one of my top ten hip hop albums of all time. Right up there with Nas and J-Dilla and Kanye and shit. Skinner's flow is unconventional and, at first glance, very bad. But what he is doing is incorporating a very casual conversational style into his rapping to help communicate the personalities and moods of the characters in the story.

Oh yeah by the way this is a concept album. It's about Mike, his two friends Dan and Scott, and his new girlfriend Simone. Mike loses 1000 pounds, gets really paranoid that one of his friends stole it, and then let's that paranoia ruin all of his interpersonal relationships. The album starts by setting up the list money and various aspects of Mike's life like his new romance and gambling addiction to set up the very everyman vibes. As Mike rambles through awkward small talk, bad decisions, bad relationships, and the slow burn out of his empathy he becomes actually really relatable. Every time Mike does something that is frustrating and stupid it just kinda endears him to me. I want to see this idiot do better. Even on Get Out Of My House where he is trying to explain to Simone that he wasn't at her place while she was hungover because he was picking up his epilepsy medication and is, by any reasonable account in the right, he sucks so hard at making his point that he still comes off as the asshole. This is punctuated by guest rapper C-Mone actually rapping much better than Mike on her verses. In fact how well a character is rapping is very much tied to how confident they are at the moment with Mike being more noticeably on beat on Not Addicted and Such A Twat and sounding really off on Get Out Of My House and It Was Supposed To Be So Easy.

The beats are not just straightforward things for Skinner to rap weird style over though. The beats often contain weird syncopation and odd rhythms that make it feel like rather than not being able to stay on beat the vocals and the beat are just circling around each other. Always in sync but never knowing each other's exact location. The way these two elements come together creates the backbone for A Grand Don't Come For Free's atmosphere of disorientation and lack of control. Mike's story is ultimately about him trying to latch onto any part of his life that he thinks he can control and constantly having those things slip away from him. He finds the £1000 in the back of his broken TV by the way.

The Mountain Goats - Beat The Champ

I got into The Mountain Goats way back when Moral Orel was airing it's infamous third season back in 08. I listened to John Darnielle's entire discography even the very rough first couple of tapes. And after all that I was pretty sure that this was my new favorite band and that no album anyone released were ever gonna top All Hail West Texas, Tallahassee, or The Sunset Tree. Fast forward seven years and I see he's working on a new album. It's gonna be about wrestling. I figure it will be pretty good, because Mountain Goats albums basically bottom out at pretty good. So the album releases, I listen to it, and instantly I know that I have forever been changed. I don't know how many times one man can keep doing this to me, but by God was I changed. I'm kinda into wrestling now as a direct result of this album.

The beauty of Darnielle's writing is that he can tease the meaning out of literally anything. Mountain Goats song don't have grand concepts. Beat The Champ's songs can be summed up easily. "Retired wrestler drives to the next show" "a biography of a wrestler that Darnielle liked as a kid" "a biography of a different wrestler that Darnielle liked as a kid" "a guy who takes his gimmick too seriously". But this isn't what the songs are about. They are about feeling tired of routine and being resigned to the fact that this will be the rest of your life. They are about how the world looks through the eyes of a child. They are about finding fulfillment in life even once you have passed your prime. They are about shutting out your emotions until you become a toxic person. These songs aren't about wrestling, but also they are. Beat The Champ made me think about how difficult pro wrestling is. You need a hyperapecific skill set that includes acting, athletics, acrobatic, and improv. And then if you are the absolute best at all those things hing and end up being the best wrestler ever? Well no one really respects pro wrestling so you get fuck all for it. The strange place these people occupy and the emotions that come with it are the perfect vessel for analyzing human experience at large. Wrestling, John Darnielle posits, is a microcosm for all life. We all play parts, we do heel turns now and then, we all fear being unmasked. Wrestlers deal with literal manifestations of human fear and Beat The Champ taps into that to create an album that both comments on human anxieties in a very real way and to humanize the people behind the kayfabe.

#lemon demon #ween #atom and his package #tv on the radio #between the buried and me #they might be giants #macintosh plus #vektroid #the field #the streets #the mountain goats #500 album gaiden

[radish-club]

This cover of Seed Song by Atom and His Package may be superior version ngl. Love the original of course, but this is so fun.

They also covered Going to Georgia and Alpha Desperation March on the same album.

#the mountain goats #tmg #atom and his package #adam goren #seed song #going to georgia

[ribcageteeth]

#come vibe with me #atom and his package #i am downright amazed at what i can destroy with just a hammer

[4trackcassette]

i can't get over this cover. this is cracking me up? do i like it? do i hate it? do i LOVE it?????

#atom and his package #tunes #Spotify

[bigmoneypastelhalloween]

#lip sync #selfie #nonbinary #atom and his package #punk rock academy #40oz

[p2ii]

making atlas and older brother would fix him

#like him reconciling with his family #but his family isn't just his dad anymore #it's atom. it's Tenma in a weird way. it's uran cause she an atom are a package deal #(it's also denkou and Mimi but that's just a me thing :p) #psii.txt

[evilwizard]

The Lich Who Stole Christmas

Every tumblrina in tumblr liked Christmas a lot.

But the lich, who lived just north of Tumblr, did not!

The lich hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season! Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason. It could be his skull wasn’t screwed on quite right. It could be, perhaps, that his skin was too tight.

But I think that the likeliest reason of all… was his heart was encased by a strange lead-lined ball.

“Last year I made something that I thought in would usher

A new age of magic—my prized OrphanCrusher.

But my patents were stolen, and my sweet new invention

Is now being used… with good-ish intentions.

You see, Christmas wishes contain lots of magic;

And my device extracts it through methods so tragic

That I dare not mention them directly here

Though the name might clue in certain readers, I fear.

The Wizard Council, now that they possess this device,

Might use it, this year, to stamp out wizard vice.

Though the process might turn quite a few kids to carrion,

The Wiz Council’s ethics are utilitarian.

So what shall I do? What is to be done?

It seems rather clear that this Christmas can’t come.

But I’ve read a few books, and I know a few tricks

So this year I’ll steal Christmas, while dressed as Saint Nick!”

So the wizard of evil returned to his lair

Stitched a red suit, and did up his hair

Built a sleek sled—and—who among us,

Could hope for a much better Rudolph than Krongus?

They took to the skies, that next Christmas Eve,

And tailgated Santa, whom they hoped to deceive

At every house he left presents, they quickly descended,

And stole the decor and the gifts he’d intended.

And when the dark wizard’s sleigh was full-loaded with gifts,

He tugged at the reigns, and they made for The Rift!

A place where the veil between worlds was thin…

And a brilliant place to dump the gifts in!

“You see,” he told Krongus, as they approached that strange crack,

“Once something goes in, it can never come back!”

“Moreover, it’s perfect,” the wizard did sing,

“For The Rift destroys every part of that thing!”

“Every instance, every atom in all multiverses,

Will be undone as though by my special dark curses.

Not a gram, not a dust speck or mote shall remain,

And no one will even remember their name!”

“But sire,” muttered Krongus, “would it not be more precise,

If you simply put in the OrphanCrusher device?”

The evil wizard thought of this, parking his sleigh in the snow.

He’d made quite a trip, and this seemed quite a blow.

“I do have one here,” he told that weird devil.

“But destroying Christmas seems rather more evil!”

Then, far behind him, and the gifts he had pillaged,

He heard a small noise coming from Tumblr Village.

It was simply a song, of holiday spirit,

But the wizard was utterly shocked just to hear it.

“It came without ribbons! It came without tags!

It came without packages, boxes or bags!”

Then the lich thought of something he hadn’t before.

Could it be Christmas was some kind of contagion or spore?

What happened next? Well, in Tumblr, they say,

The lich’s dead heart exploded that day!

And the combustive force of that villainous blast,

Airlifted the sleigh, and brought it right back,

To the village, where Tumblrinas rejoiced!

Then continued to sing, and lift up their voice.

And back at the rift, the lich, with head in a spin,

At the edge of the rift dropped the OrphanCrusher in.

So Christmas was saved, by accident mostly,

Though performing a good deed turned the bad wizard ghostly.

“Come, Krongus—we must now return to my tower,

While I wait several months to return to full power.”

And at Wizard Council HQ, certain strategist seers,

Saw all this occur through the orbs that they peered.

They smiled, and high-fived, and struck up the band,

Pleased that these events had gone just as planned.

#evil poetry #long post #happy holidays <|:^)

[dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice]

The Grim Reaper's Guide to Breaking Every Rule of the Universe /// Prologue

I'm not super happy with this prologue but I've done my best with it :'). Also I gave God He/They pronouns. Enjoy!

Summary: When touring America for the sake of it, you go to stay with your aunt in New Orleans for a while, taking up a peaceful part-time job restoring objects. But a few weeks in, a package arrives containing an old radio that's seen better days, along with a note seemingly written by someone who thinks they could fist-fight the Devil.

What you didn't know, was the hell of a path that was now set out in front of you. Not fist-fighting the Devil, but instead a very smug radio host who would have no problem spending the rest of his days driving you up the walls.

But two could play that game.

Tags: Demiromantic-Asexual Alastor x Demiromantic-Asexual OC/Reader - 1920s/30s New Orleans - fluff - angst - EXTREME slow burn - crack - Violence (It's Alastor what else)

Word Count: 1227

Warnings: Uhhhh idk unless you count God as one.

Taglist - comment or message to be added!

Now available on Wattpad and AO3 (please let me know if links aren't working)

Prologue // Chapter 1 >

Prologue

Before time began, there was her.

Cælitis (Definition): The divinities who dwell within the celestial planes. (Noun)

The Universe – The Beginning

Perhaps it was a coincidence, or a mistake, or there was something far greater beyond the confines of the ever-expanding walls of the universe. They had accepted solitary, thinking they were the only one, the first, when they awoke to a dark abyss, with the veins of creation pulsating at his fingertips. This was what God thought when they reached out for the first time, light bursting from within, shooting out and collecting into a colossal sphere. A star, he had named it, and he had much fun for who knows how long, floating through the endless vacuum, using these fiery balls of fire and gas to light his way. He would make them every colour he could think of, clumping some together to form the nebulas, or shooting some off into the middle of nowhere, just for the sake of it. Sometimes, he would press atoms so close together they would form rocks of all shapes and sizes, letting them wander and float around until they began clumping together into similar spherical shapes. He even swirled some clusters of stars and rocks around, watching as they turned into disks that would spin forever – galaxies, he decided to label them as. Before long, the universe was scattered with clusters of stars, planets, and whatever else they felt like creating, some so big their size was incomprehensible, others microscopic in comparison, and the rest varying in between.

When God had decided to rest their powers for a short while, he hadn’t expected to awake to the feeling that something was off when he observed his work. A small ripple, something he wouldn’t have picked up on if he knew they were the only being currently in existence. It passed through them, and he quickly shot towards the nebula that sat in the centre of his universal domain, their birthplace, so to speak. And what he came across was something very wrong. And he finally came to the realisation that he wasn’t alone.

It looked like a cloud at first. A dark mass that swirled and flared it tendrils around frantically as it contorted in and out of itself. He wouldn’t have been able to see it if it weren’t for the carnage it had left behind, it’s pitch black silhouette a stark contrast against the flickering specks of light behind it – the broken remains of his precious stars and planets.

Though he did not fear it. They knew that if this being had come into existence, it was here for a reason.

The Goddess was a being not many creatures knew about, and God wanted to keep it that way. He didn’t want anyone to know he had an equal, someone, if aware of everything they could do, could rival him and his authority.

He was Creation, and she was Destruction. Not solely there to destroy everything, no. She was brought into existence to ensure there was change, to make sure God didn’t slow down, always keeping him on his metaphorical feet. He had welcomed change when they had first come across her, but not too much. See, he wanted things to progress, but on his terms, so when the flailing tendrils of the Goddess had parted to reveal a mass of black wings and hundreds of very curious eyes peering up at them, he immediately took them under his own wings, teaching them the timeline of the universe around them. Her naivety hadn’t flown past him, she had just come into existence after all, and at this realisation he was delighted.

Billions of years passed by under the tutelage of God, telling the Goddess that she was his creation, what was divine and what was sacrilege. She absorbed it all, enchanted by the ways of what she believed to be her ‘creator’.

At one point, Destruction was overseeing a supernova just outside the Andromeda galaxy when God had approached her, eager to show her something. Reluctant but curious, she agreed, allowing them take her to another celestial plane, gesturing his arms out wide and welcoming her to Heaven.

He introduced her to his creations, his hierarchy of the divine. From the Seraphims, all the way down to the angels. For a time the Goddess resided with them, telling them about her ways of existence, though it wasn’t always received positively. In fact, there was only one creation that was intrigued by her path of dismantlement, a chirpy seraphim named Lucifer, who would spend most of his free time following her around with wide eager eyes, asking questions a mile a minute. The Goddess would always answer truthfully, and soon enough God began to grow weary of the friendly exchange between the two.

It wasn’t long before he was dragging her back through the planes, until they came across a very colourful planet. Entering through the atmosphere, the two floated down until they arrived on top of wall that encased a very interesting sight.

For as far as the eye could see, there was desert, but within the confines of this wall was a lush paradise, filled to the brim with every possible plant. The Garden of Eden.

God revealed two creatures that he had brought into existence, their names Adam, and Lilith, and they were to create the human race. Though his idea didn’t last very long – Lucifer had trailed after the Goddess into Eden one day, going off on another one of his excitable tangents on whatever was flying through his head at the time, when he had come face to face with the cunning and evaluating eyes of Lilith.

Obviously most know what happened after that, and God had quickly created Eve, but when she and Adam both failed his expectations after Lucifer and Lilith tempted them with the apple from the tree, he soon made changes.

The Seraphim and his new wife were cast down into a new celestial plane called Hell, and God then turned to the Goddess, seething, accusing her – that she had planted those thoughts and questions into his creation’s mind. They wouldn’t hear any excuse, leaving her until near the end of Adam and Eve’s once immortal life on Earth.

When he approached her again, they said he had a new job for her, and she followed, hopeful for their friendship to be restored, though doubts began to creep into her mind when she saw what was before her.

Purgatory, he had revealed it to be, was where she would take mortal souls after their physical body expired and sort them between Heaven and Hell. Next was the Underworld, where, if a soul was displaced in either of the two afterlives, it would go there to remain for eternity, or if she decided to send it back to Earth to be reincarnated. It was her new domain, where she would reside when she wasn’t on Earth collecting new souls.

Distressed, the Goddess asked why she was to do this, but God said nothing, only explaining further on what her new purpose entailed, and she grew more and more distraught at the new path he had laid out in front of her. She was no longer to be regarded as Destruction, but instead would spend the rest of eternity to be called a new, more fitting name, one he thought described her purpose of being perfectly:

Death.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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#alastor #alastor x reader #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor fanfic #alastor x you #alastor x oc

[k-sci-janitor]

I always imagined BVR sounds like a cross between Jeff R0senstock and Atom & His Package, anyway Hermann hates every second of it.

#draw in a fury today bc I’ve been listening to too much sad music #pacific rim #newmann #ksci draws #hermann gottlieb #bvr mention #fan comics

[transforming]

The Vitruvian Vault

Maximilien was wearing a tux that fit tightly around his built frame, and his handsome face made everyone’s heads turn and gawk at him.  His charming smile made everyone watching swoon. What they didn’t know was that he wasn’t really that handsome, or muscular, or attractive, and that he wouldn’t be this if he never found the Vitruvian Vault.

Three months ago, Max was on the metro when he saw an envelope fall from another man’s pocket. He didn’t seem to notice that it fell, as he didn’t look back, and the doors were closing anyway, so Max looked around and carefully swooped it up and put it in his satchel.

Getting off at Seneca, he walked to his cramped studio apartment (which came with no bathroom, just a toilet and a sink) and rummaged through his satchel and slid the envelope into his hands. Opening it, he found an empty piece of paper and something else - a remote of sorts. It was a flat piece of plastic with a light at the end, with a singular button, emblazoned with a copy of da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man.

“One button with the Vitruvian Man?” he asked, curious. He looked at his small flat screen, aimed the remote to it, and pressed it. 

Nothing.

“So not a TV remote, I guess,” he said dejected, and accidentally pressed the button as the remote aimed at the front door. The wooden door glowed and Max gawked as atom by atom, it transformed into a metal one.

“Woah, what the–” his voice trailed off as the door shifted and morphed into metal. Max carefully approached it and turned the handle.

On the other side was not the corridor of his apartment floor, but a huge warehouse full of human-sized pods. The room was super bright, and as Max stepped in, he heard a voice from somewhere:

“Welcome to the Vitruvian Vault, Mr. Lopez,” it said in a flat, almost robotic tone. “Please close the door behind you.”

Max did as was told. He walked down the steps and took a close look at the pods. Each one had a screen, with pictures of beautiful people of all ethnic backgrounds and sexual orientations.

“Wh-what is this place?” he asked to… well, no one.

Steam hissed from an area of the warehouse, and a humanoid robot was walking towards him. Max was frightened - it’s like seeing the robot inside the Terminator, about to kill him. Instead though, the android pressed a button on the screen of a pod, and it opened to reveal a handsome young man. 

“Mr. Lopez-”

“M-Max,” he stammered.

“Max, call me Marwan. I’ll be your guide to the Vault.”

“So wait, this… this Vault thing, it houses bodysuits?”

“Not just bodysuits… well, it stores copies of bodies, but the ways you can use them are endless,” Marwan chuckled.

He led Max to an empty white room.

“This is where we scan you so the bodies can be calibrated to your… physical size? Yes, that’s it.”

Marwan positioned Max in the center of the room, and an oculus opened above. Lasers aimed all over his clothed body as the Vault’s AI measured every area of Max’s body (including package, which did not enthuse the ladies and gents), while also assessing the types of bodies Max would like. It took about ten minutes until the oculus shut itself.

He sighed, “So what now?”

“We pick out bodies we think you’d like,” Marwan smiled as he led his ‘master’ back out into the warehouse. 

“Okay, so… here we have about ten specific bodies we think you–”

“H-him…” Max stammered, staring at a pod.

“Oh, this guy. Well, he’s of French origin, so you’ll be able to speak French very sexily in this vessel. I mean, you could speak anything sexily in–” Marwan said, interrupted by Max.

“What are the ways?” he asked.

The screen flashed five options:

Bodysuit

Avatar

Body swap

Permanent merge

“Which option would you like to take, Max?” Marwan asked, walking over to look into the pod.

“I choose…”

A year later…

Weird enough, he’s still a robot, and they’re both trying to find a way to make him human, but sometimes, it never mattered anymore. They love each other.

“Je suis Max,” he mumbled. He chuckled. He was indeed sexy, the very definition of pulchritude. The Vitruvian Vault gave him a new lease on life, and now, it was someone else’s turn. Luckily enough, he got to explore the whole vault to understand how it works, seeing all the bodies.

He dropped the envelope and walked away, smirking, knowing whoever picks it up will have a real adventure.

And that person is you. What do you plan to do with the Vault?

#male tf #vitruvian vault #nerd to male model #tf by technology #leos-tf-stories

[radish-club]

And I know you're Waiting

For the ironic ending

And I know you're Waiting

For the ~punchline~

And I know you're Waiting

For the //Rain// to come by

Well, so am I

So am I

So am I

So am I

So am I

So am I

So am I

"Seed Song" - the Mountain Goats

#the mountain goats #tmg #is a tmg song #but the repeated “so am i”s past the first 4 is more from the atom and his package version #arguably my preferred version

[materialsscienceandengineering]

hi, do you have any resource recommendations for laypeople who want to grasp the most important essentials/fundamentals of material science? any help will be very appreciated!

Great question! Unfortunately, our definitions of 'laypeople' and 'fundamentals' may vary, so if this list doesn't have what you're looking for just let me know and I'll give it another shot.

Let's start with some... let's say 'unpublished/unofficial' resources. First - this blog. Not to toot my own horn, but I've got a good collection of original posts (try the tag MyMSEPost, or this year's newest variety 2024Daily) that I hope are fairly readable to the general public - and come with links and further reading resources for each topic. However, these posts are not comprehensive. I don't think I've ever talked about what is a crystal structure, for example. [Also, I've been doing this for, wow, almost 10 years now, so... that's a fair number of posts...] I also, one upon a time, made some MSE Masterpost posts, though those are probably pretty outdated by now and I can't guarantee the links all work.

Another resource is msestudent.com. They don't have an about page, but it seems to be a more official (i.e., non-Tumblr) blog about the fundamentals. That being said, while they do have a search system, they don't seem to have a table of contents. Both of these resources will help you learn some fundamentals, but they won't tell you what the fundamentals are if you don't already know them.

Other science Tumblr blogs have come and gone over the years, but @materiallugy seems to be currently posting, and @matmake was not too long ago. Both have separate websites with resources, though I'm not sure how comprehensive.

Now for undergraduate level resources that are comprehensive. These are introductory, but I suppose they might presuppose a high-school level education (basic chemistry and physics, probably):

Online classes, such as MIT OpenCourseware, or Coursera (two examples of many). Some of these kinds of resources are free, some aren't. MIT, in particular, isn't so much a class you take online as it is the resources (and sometimes videos) of their classes.

Textbooks. I used Materials Science and Engineering: An Introduction (Callister and Rethwisch), which I think is pretty common and a well respected book. Obviously it costs money, but I think it's safe to say you could go back a couple editions and save some money.

Less comprehensive but still official is the University of Cambridge's Teaching and Learning Packages. Again, this won't tell you what are the fundamentals if you don't know already know. For example, there are 78 at the moment - I wouldn't say the additive manufacturing TLP is essential to MSE, but atomic scale structure of materials is.

Additional resources:

Specifically corrosion

Online, virtual, general chemistry textbook

Online, virtual, organic chemistry textbook

Someone else's compiled list of links and resources, which may be outdated

YouTube videos from a professor of MSE (side note: I have not watched these and cannot verify their accuracy or usefulness, but the guy does teach this stuff for a living...)

Hope this helps, and everyone feel free to chime in if you have any resources of your own you use!

#Materials Science #Science #Student #Anonymous #Replies

[haveyouheardthisband]

#Synth Punk #Pop Punk #Geek Rock #Slacker Rock #Punk Rock #1990s #2000s #USA #poll #gore tw #<? #Spotify

[davenweenie]

Lab Rats HCs!!!

-Chase has nicknames for all of his teammates as well as his siblings. He even had some for some of his students.

-he calls Bree ‘bee’ and it started when they were only just little kids and were called Subject A, B and C. B is bee to him. He also calls her breezy or speedy because that’s what Mr Davenport used to call her before they had names.

-really cliche but he calls Leo 'Lion' because he thinks it’s funny when Leo gets all flustered when he does it. Leo gets embarrassed because he knows he’s not really anything like a lion. He also calls him ‘butter fingers’ and ‘handy man’ and he thinks he’s funny with that one since Leo’s bionic in one arm.

-he calls Adam ‘Atom’ and I love this nickname for Adam. I think I saw it in a fic about how the kids got their names and it was because Mr Davenport called him atom bomb (I think, I might have just imagined it) in the fic. Chase pick up on stuff really easily, that includes nicknames for people. He also calls Adam ‘hulk’ which everyone loves.

-Kaz has many nicknames from Chase, his favourite one is ‘fire boy’ and this one’s actually canon. He also calls him ‘Azzy’ which I have definitely stolen from a Chaz fic. Chase also calls him ‘button’ and nobody is sure why it started.

-he calls Oliver ‘drink dispenser’ and ‘refrigerator’ which he thinks is absolutely hilarious. Everyone calls Oliver ‘Oli’ or ‘Oli-pop’ which Chase has picked up on. He also has take to calling him ‘liver’ which Oliver hates.

-Skylar’s nicknames are ‘E.T’ ‘alien’ and other alien references. Chase also started calling her ‘toes’ after he found out about her weird alien feet. He also makes a lot of Star Wars jokes around her.

-Mr Davenport is ‘Donnie Darko’ or ‘weird man’ which Chase has absolutely no idea why he started.

-Douglas is ‘trash man’ or ‘rat man’ which stems from him being previously homeless.

-Chase has emetophobia (phobia of vomit) and refuses to eat anything sugary after he had hurled after eating loads of cake when he wasn’t used to real food yet.

-Bree can somehow always whip out bars of chocolate or random packaged food whenever people need it. Like she always has food stashed away somewhere on her.

-Chase mothers People a lot. He’s the one that carries around plasters and hydration for people on outings, he for some reason always has a snack on hand like Bree does. His are usually healthy and nobody wants them though.

-Kaz and Oliver are the only ones on the team that know how to human properly. Skylar is an alien, Bree and Chase grew up in a basement so they struggle to function like normal humans in society. They don’t understand certain aspects of being people. They didn’t know what Easter was until Kaz and Oliver came along. They still didn’t understand what Santa was and what his purpose is supposed to be. They don’t understand things that are normally natural to do for humans. Chase couldn’t understand the concept of homophobia because it was so normalised in the basement.

- (TW for homophobia and hate crimes) Chase and Kaz were almost hate crimed coming home from a date once. Six guys had started following them and yelling at them. They (Kaz and Chase) didn’t say anything and carried on walking. One of them grabbed Chase and Kaz went ballistic. He got so mad that even his hair lit on fire.

-adding to that, Kaz’s hair can ignite like a match if he’s mad enough. So far he hasn’t figured out how to do it on command.

-they have meals together almost every night. Kaz almost always cooks and man can cook really good food. Having 11(?) siblings means he taught himself to cook so that he could feed his siblings when their parents couldn’t be bothered to.

And to finish off I want to say how happy I am to see all the likes and reblogs on my posts. A couple have had hashtags talking about how much they love these HCs and how they imagine the same things as me and it makes me so incredibly happy. Thanks to everyone who actually likes these!

#adam davenport #bree davenport #chase davenport #chase x kaz #donald davenport #lab rats #leo dooley #oliver mighty med #skylar storm #tasha davenport #elite force #mighty med #these are still way too long #headcanon #kaz mighty med #headcanons

[mabelstone]

Love Language

matt stone x reader

part three of handsome stranger <3

masterlist ✧˖°.

word count: 1.5k

cw: incredibly cheesy, gushy, sweet, slow sex... dare i say love making

note: if you've read/watched me before you, i keep imagining the female character in this with Lou's sort of charisma and fashion sense, minus the bright outward colours. like, very gentle and happy, lots of layers. just very cute.

***

You'd spent most of your evenings with Matt throughout Autumn. It was approaching mid November and there were certainly no shortcomings in the affection department. You'd come to learn his love language was words of affirmation and acts of service. He'd learned yours was physical touch.

He'd often show up with flowers or little treats he'd picked up on his way home from work. Once, he bought you a portable heater when you were struggling to acclimate to the very different Autumn than you were used to.

"It's fall," he'd correct you, kissing your forehead while you rolled your eyes.

This time you'd shown up to his place bundled up with a white fluffy scarf he'd picked out for you. It just made me think of you, he'd simply shrugged it off after you'd thanked him a hundred times. You wore a fluffy coat over a collared burgundy dress with white hearts printed over it, with black stockings underneath, something you'd grown accustomed to wearing everyday in the cold weather of New York. When you arrived, two coffees were waiting on the counter. He'd never drink his until you were there.

"Hey, pretty girl," he'd beam at you when you walked in, leaning against the balcony rails with a cigarette burning between his fingers. You stumbled out toward him, being engulfed in his warm embrace within seconds. The cigarette smoke didn't bother you anymore. It'd become almost a comfort, the smell sometimes lingering on your clothes, a welcomed remnant of the nights you shared.

After weeks of spending your time together, you still hadn't slept with him. It wasn't as if you weren't sexually attracted to him; by God, you were. You were just enjoying taking it slow for once. With Matt, time felt infinite, yet as if it were slipping through your fingers like sand. You were so enamoured by one another that you just wanted to consume each other, fusing each and every atom to his, merging into one synonymous being.

He was the whole package. Externally, sure, he was nothing short of breathtaking. Painfully handsome, tall, captivating. But him. The Matthew you'd grown so familiar with; expressive, gentle, warm, every nice word you could use to describe one's nature. He understood you. He was funny, tentative, and honestly treated you better than anyone ever had. Your dating history, with the douche bags in Australia, was... less than admirable.

"How'd your meeting go?" You smiled sweetly over your shared cups of coffee, your hands thawing around the hot mug and occasionally, between his hands.

"Good, meant my day finished early." He released your hand, stepping up from the couch to open the fridge. "So I had time to make you something." He grinned over at you, beckoning you over with the tilt of his head.

You giggled to yourself but followed after regardless. "Is that?-"

"Golden syrup dumplings," he mimicked your accent terribly, his smile just as wide as yours. "You said you missed your mom and she'd always make them for you so... a little bit of your home in my home."

You beamed before him, cheeks beginning to hurt from your unwavering smile. "You..." You leaned up to kiss him, grin impossibly growing against his lips. All you could do was shake your head incredulously, looking up at him with crows feet crinkling beside your eyes. "No one's ever been so thoughtful." Truthfully, you could've cried from just how sweet he was, but of course, you couldn't be too soft in front of him.

"It's just food," he brushed it off as he usually did, as if this were the most normal thing to do for someone. "Well, go on. Try it."

"It's usually served hot, but I'll let it slide," you joked, taking a spoonful into your mouth.

"So? The verdict?" He watched you intently, his eyes sparkling like a little kid in a lolly shop. "Good as mom's?"

You groaned exaggeratedly, grabbing him by the face.

"Better than mum's," you kissed him again, sighing into him. His arms snaked around you autonomously, your own draping around the back of his neck. He pulled you in closer, your fronts flush against one another. His hands travelled to your hips as he deepened the kiss, yours travelling the expanse of his neck and shoulders. "Bedroom?" You requested softly against his lips, Matt nodding before kissing you once more, taking your hand in his, leading you to his bed.

He sat down, pulling you to straddle his lap, peppering kisses along your neck and collarbones. You purred in his lap, craning your neck to give him better access. Your cheeks heated as you felt him harden against you, that welcome warmth glowing inside your stomach.

"Beautiful," he murmured against your skin, nimble fingers effortlessly unzipping the back of your dress. You stood with his hands in yours, allowing the soft cotton to slip off your shoulders, left to pool around your ankles. He stood too, allowing you to help him strip his shirt off. Your hands roamed his chest, his skin the most inviting warmth to your freezing digits. You helped him slip of his pants, too, both of you standing in your underwear.

To be fair, this was quite unusual for you. A newly introduced intimacy of soft touch and whispered praises. Nothing you'd ever experienced, yet it was the most comfortable you'd ever felt in a sexual manner. Few words were shared, yet there seemed to be a perfectly coherent conversation unfolding between you both that couldn't be translated into a spoken language.

This time you climbed into bed, pulling him on top of you. He was swift with connecting his lips to your skin again, clearly wanting as much of you as he could get. The feeling was unmistakably mutual. You leaned forward slightly, unclipping your bra before slipping it onto the floor. He marvelled over the sight before him, taking all of you in. You guided a hand of his to cup your breast, feeling your nipple harden under his touch. He palmed it with one, the other holding his weight above you. You snaked a gentle hand down to palm him through his briefs, your thread of patience thinning by the second. "Please," your voice was barely above a whisper, the dim light from the kitchen leaking into the room, bathing his body in an ethereal glow.

He nodded, kissing you tenderly before reaching into his bedside dresser and pulling out a bottle of lube. You helped one another discard your underwear, for the first time, no layer of clothing obstructing the feel of the others skin.

How could you gently tell him the lube wouldn't be necessary? One swipe of his finger across your heat delivered the message for you. He almost whimpered softly, watching the way your eyebrows furrowed slightly and your lashes swept across your cheekbones, eyes fluttering opening periodically to meet his gaze as he gently gathered your slick on his fingers.

His eyes met yours once more, a flash of uncertainty, soon extinguished by your smile and nod of approval.

Slowly, he slid himself in, inch by heavenly inch, lacing one of his hands with your own. He let out a deep, drawn out groan, a beautiful harmonisation with the mewl he pulled from you. Your stomach tightened instantaneously, those beautiful butterflies swarming in your lower abdomen as shocks of electricity pulsed through your nerve endings.

Soft breaths exchanged as he slid in and out effortlessly, your hands cradling his beautiful jaw. With each thrust, a gentle hum of appraisal slipping into the shared air between you; the most angelic sounds either of you had ever heard.

This was different than anything you'd ever shared with someone. Tender, premeditated movements, solely focused on making each other feel good. You kissed slow and gently, lips moving in perfect synchronicity.

"You're perfect," he breathed, lips ghosting along your collarbones as he continued to sink himself deeper into you.

Your eyes fluttered shut as you seemingly gained consciousness for the first time in your existence. The feel of his warm, soft skin of his unclothed body against yours, his soft lips brushing yours periodically; barely exchanging words beside his gentle praises and your pretty whimpers and breaths. You were completely aware of your every nerve ending, feeling all of his length delve in and out of your heat, filling you more than perfectly.

"Matt," your words were delicate as they lingered in the space between your mouths, soon buried beneath soft pants as the coil of pleasure within both of your cores began unwinding. You breathed him in, every sense of yours heightening.

He delivered his final slow but deep strokes, losing himself too as you pulsated around him, waves of euphoric pleasure pummelling you in his embrace. You both came down from your highs together, foreheads touching, fingers intertwined.

He gently pulled out, laying beside you, pulling you against his chest. You listened to his slowly steadying heartbeat, a nonchalant calmness you often felt in his presence dispersing through your bloodstream.

"Was this all just a ploy to get me into bed with you?" You lifted your head to face him, an amused grin playing on both of your flushed lips.

"No... but I think now I have another reason to bake desserts for you."

#matt stone #matt stone x reader #matt stone smut

[eightyonekilograms]

It is very common to introduce quantum physics in an historical context. Though there are advantages to this, it is a problem that many of the stories that have become central to the physics lore are mere pseudo-histories far detached from the real events. It is about time that we stop uncritically copying these stories and instead make an effort to present the development of quantum physics as it actually was. This paper deals with one of the most common myths in quantum history, the one about the ultraviolet catastrophe and how it motivated Planck's introduction of quantum physics. On closer inspection it turns out this story has the time-line completely turned on its head. The ultraviolet catastrophe was first discussed several years after Planck published his radiation law so it played no role in his motivation. Instead Planck was concerned with finding a theoretical derivation of the law for blackbody radiation. This law was first thought to be Wien's radiation law, but when new data disagreed, Planck came up with his own law that fitted the data. Planck's radiation law first came about as an elaborate fit to data and to derive it he found no other way than to use statistical mechanics and divide the energy that was to be distributed on the atomic oscillators into packages hf so that he could count the number of ways to distribute this energy. Planck did not consider this a quantization, but merely a mathematical trick to be able to calculate the entropy of the oscillators.

@raginrayguns