"The Royal Forester" by The Bedlam Boys
The song was bouncy, catchy and exactly clean enough to be sung in daylight. In fact an evening crowd would probably be disappointed by the lack of details. Especially after the ale had been flowing for a bit. However for an afternoon performance at a market day, it was a good choice.
Geralt resented vaguely that he now knew enough about music to be able to say that with confidence. Not that he was saying anything. He was in fact, sitting in the shade of the tree the little stage was set in front of. It left him hidden from the crowd of the market by the shade, and the tree itself was at the edge of the field so no one but another performer would be approaching from the rear, or really coming around the sides, leaving him in relative peace.
The sound of Jaskier’s voice was loud enough to drown out the mutters and murmurs of the crowd, and familiar enough to be relaxing, allowing him to rest. No doubt anyone who saw him would think he was asleep, but he was only resting his eyes.
The song must have been new, because as Jaskier was wrapping up, he got asked to sing it again.
He did of course.
To the outside observer, it would have appeared that he had stayed asleep until his boot was nudged. But he hadn’t been asleep (not properly) in the first place, and in the second, he’d known the bard was approaching.
For one thing, he could smell Jaskier -and that he was carrying fresh bread, at least one meat pie, and sweetbread of some sort.
“Weren’t you the one who was so very firm that we wouldn’t be staying here?” Jaskier asked and went to poke him again. “And here you are, taking a nap.”
“Hmn.” He opened one eye, and Jaskier pulled his foot back without poking him again. “Are you done?”
“Indeed I am, they’ve been quite generous;” He jiggled the bags in his arms. “I mean, a little light on the coin, but if they give me what I would have bought anyway, I’ll take it.”
“Coin’s lighter.”
“You haven’t tried these rolls.”
It didn’t take long to collect Roach from the paddock outside the inn. She grabbed another mouthful of the hay to chew while she was re-tacked, and tried to lunge for more as he got her bridle on. Shuffling, Roach gave him a dirty look, which he ignored in favor of pressing his head to hers.
Jaskier gave a squeak and he glared over at him. The bard just grinned, trying to balance his purchases into his bag. He offered one of the rolls. Geralt took it and gave a bit of a grunt, how much nutrition could be in a roll that light.
It did taste good, however, eggy with a touch of some floral flavoring.
Since Jaskier had gotten dinner, he wouldn’t need to hunt tonight. They kept walking until the evening gloom started to fade to proper dark, making it to a decent campsite that he’d used before. From the looks of things, other travelers had made use of it since, leaving a polite pile of fallen wood, and a cairn pointing towards the stream.
Setting up the camp was old habit now, duties split and handled without a word between them, which was nice. (Sometimes, when on the Path alone, Geralt would forget to do the things Jaskier normally handled until last.) He led Roach to the stream for a night time drink, while Jaskier hummed to himself, getting things set to his liking. Igni might be faster, but the bard was quite skilled with flint and tinder.
When Geralt came back Jaskier was sprawled beside the firepit, spreading a cloth out and setting the food out singing to himself without a care in the world.
“With me ribbin-run-rority ri-run-rority ri-no-ority-an ~” he sang.
Geralt nudged him over and he fell back as the Witcher moved to the pile of tack to wipe it down. Roach nibbling at some browse at the edge of the clearing, content to remain within sight of her rider. There was even a convenient log to sit on while he worked.
“Rude.” Jaskier sniffed getting to his feet and theatrically dusting off his bottom. “Never a patron of the arts, are you?” he demanded, hands on his hips.
“It was a very silly song.”
“It wasn’t supposed to be serious.” he flapped a hand
“No I mean...” he made a gesture with one hand. “the girl, if she could pace a horse like that, she should have been able to fight him. And then she had to marry him?”
“Well that part was accurate anyway.”
The Witcher gave him a skeptical look.
“Still. White skin or not, she’d be a muscular girl. One good kick and he’d go down.”
“Oh?” Jaskier cocked one of his feet up on the log beside Geralt. The heels were not really suited for long distance walking, but his boots were solidly built, rising up to just below the knee where his pants tucked in. “An admirer of legs that can pace a horse?”
Geralt glanced down, then up again. He nudged at his knee with an elbow.
”You’re in my way.”
The looseness of Jaskier’s trousers hid the muscle beneath, but the pose tightened it across his thigh. Geralt couldn’t help but flick his eyes over the leg again, catching on the detail of the ribbon that tightened the lower cuff was trailing out over the top of one of the boots. Narrow as it was, it was woven in a pattern- unnecessarily fancy for a part of the clothes no one would ever see.
“Why was an earl’s daughter out by herself?” he added. “Even if she was clearly capable.”
“Why indeed?” Jaskier leaned over, resting his elbow on his raised knee. “I wonder.”
Geralt ignored him, finishing wiping the tack down and setting it aside. IT did bring his head closer to Jaskier’s raised leg. Jaskier didn’t move so he shoved him again so he could use the log to spread out the drying tack.
Wandering back over towards the cloth spread with food, Jaskier started talking again.
“So- I heard that over a short space of time, humans can run faster than horses.”
“Why would anyone study that?” Horses did need time to get up to speed. But since they could sustain speed longer once they got to it, it didn’t really matter. Though if someone was clever and nimble, they could probably take advantage of that idea with stops and starts. He’d done it once, actually when some idiot mercenaries had decided to try and steal the proof of a completed contract. Why they thought that was going to be worth it he had no idea.
“Well some people are weird about horses. No one I know, I’m sure.” He flashed a smile over, tearing into another of those sweet rolls. “I also heard a lord claiming that a well trained troupe of soldiers could absolutely keep up with the officers horses on foot.”
“I hope they complained less than you do.”
“Oh probably, being trained soldiers and not artists.”
“I’m not sure what kind of point you’re tiring to make bard. Since neither of those is a earl’s daughter.”
He almost expected Jaskier to choke on the roll, he sighed so hard.
“It’s entertainment; excitement, hyperbole, romance!”
Without stopping to check with his brain, Geralt’s mouth said
“Wouldn’t there be more romance if the girl was the blacksmith’s daughter then.”
Jaskier’s eyes lit up with glee. “Oh so you DO listen!”
“No.”
“Oh so you’re just spontaneously developing opinions on romance then?”
It wasn’t spontaneous, since the printing press had been developed, courtly romances were some of the least expensive books out there, and made up several shelves of the keep’s library, reaching back to the beginning of the genre. But Geralt managed not to say that, grunting dismissively and instead looking over the food. There was too much for him to have an excuse to go off hunting.
Fuck.
Fortunately, the bard had never needed his input to hold a conversation
“Traditionally you’d be right, the deserving, clever or dedicated girl of the lower classes rising to marry a noble is a staple. But let’s face it, most nobles wouldn’t give the price of a fig for a common girl’s maidenhead, and often don’t.” He grimaced, and jiggled his leg a little in irritation.
Frankly one of the reasons Geralt had never so much as insinuated that Jaskier should get his own horse was the faint primordial terror of how much energy the bard would have if he wasn’t doing his own walking.
“Last year there was a song going around where a charming young man keeps trying to court a pretty girl out with a flock of geese, and she keeps telling him he’s simply not worth his time. So he keeps trying, gaining rank and money- ridiculously quickly, let’s be honest, but it’s a five-minute-song, hardly a long form ballad, until he can’t go back to see if she thinks he’s worthy, now, because he’s become a war hero, and the local lord wants to reward him and brings out his daughter, and guess who it was?”
“The girl with the geese.”
“Got it in one.” he agreed.
“Please tell me he said she wasn’t worth all that work.”
“Oh no, they lived happily ever after. I should write that alternate version though, that’s great. ~Not the worth of a pin or a measure of grain, leave me alone, I ask you again /Stay lady stay, I will prove my worth yet, for your golden hair my heart it is set~” he vocalized vaguely, but Geralt was fairly sure that wasn’t one of his. “~a paper of pins, a measure of grain, a field of kine, an acre of land/ my lady was worth more again, but two steel swords are the cost of your hand.~”
“So instead you have an athletic earl’s daughter and a cad of a forest keeper?”
“Well, the implication that she might have been okay with it until he tried to run out on her,” Jaskier admitted, jerking his mind out of recomposing a song and back to the conversation at hand.
“Hmnn.”
“No, you’re right, it is much more a punishment for her for giving in, even with that implication. And I would never want to punish someone from thinking with their heart.” He wiggled a finger at Geralt admonishingly. “Yes heart, I can hear your skin creaking with the hoist of that eyebrow. Even if it’s cupboard love or momentary love, or skin love, it’s still love. Love comes in endless varieties and I am but a humble scholar trying to capture it in a bestiary.”
“I’m going to eat the last of these dumplings if you’re busy, bard.” They were quite good, even cold. Some sort of cheese, apple and onion filling.
“What! No!”
Geralt managed to put them down with the other food before Jaskier barreled into him, intent on getting the shallow basket away. He roiled them away from the laid out cloth, but deliberately grabbed another to stuff in his mouth as he went.
It was ridiculous how uncivilized Jaskier could get with the right provocation. He’d descend from upper class artistic visionary to an untrained big pawed puppy with all the grace of an avalanche. It was soothing on a certain level for Geralt, he could win instantly of course, but play wrestling had no urgency and reminded him of home. Rough and tumble, a brotherly sort of lo- affection- no interaction. With the first of the apple harvests started, he might plan a northernly route. Distracted by that, he found Jaskier’s thighs around him, pinning one arm entirely and the other partially with fairly impressive grip and strength. It wouldn’t have worked if he hadn’t managed to catch them at the narrower part of Geralt’s waist. And despite he locking of his ankles it would hardly last long.
The flaw was of course, he was out of reach of the dumplings.
“One.” Geralt said with faint amusement. “You’re proving my point about the girl’s ability to defend herself.”
Jaskier gave an offended huff and squeezed harder. Geralt snorted.
“Two. You know perfectly well I can get out of this at anytime.”
Jaskier tried to tip to the side to reach further, and Geralt declined to move with him, leading to some interesting gyrations as he fought to make it happen. Finally he just sat back and let his legs go slack, releasing Geralt’s arms from the hold. He was kind of glad, getting loose would have gotten his hands a bit closer to bits of Jaskier he liked to pretend didn’t exist, despite far too extensive knowledge to the contrary.
They were covered in dust, but Jaskier got to the package of dumplings and shoved one in his mouth immediately.
“Anyway, that is a point in my favor as well.” He mumbled, stopping only to savor the flavor. “You could have broken out, but you didn’t. You liked me where I was.”
“Well, it is better to know where you are.”
“Sure, you say that now. You hated the bells.”
“It was a stupid outfit. They were real silver though.”
“I’m glad they were useful.” he said sourly.
“Had to happen eventually.” without thinking his finger plucked at the ribbon sticking out of Jaskier’s boot, tugging at and winding it around his finger. From this sprawl, he could see that the waist was tightened with the same narrow band of blue with yellow flowers and red edges. A dumpling appeared in front of his face, and he quite naturally grabbed it. Jaskier reclaimed his leg and made a theatrical show of counting his fingers.
“I thought the Wolf thing was just in name.”
“I don’t know if I ever said that.”
The dry statement startled a laugh out of Jaskier, an altogether happy and pleasing sound.
“As ever your timing is impeccable.” He grinned dropping his chin onto one knee. “Still now you’re pushing for accuracy in all my songs, not just the ones about you? I shall be a beggar and you will have to support me to keep me from starving in the streets without the tools of bardic language. Or I’ll switch entirely to puns.”
“... you’d be strung up in a week.”
“Well, I am already hung.” he laughed again as Geralt growled his annoyance and reclaimed the basket of dumplings. Jaskier snatched one more and relented. When he patted Geralt’s shoulder the witcher turned away slightly shielding the last dumplings with his body, only making Jaskier laugh further, instead of reacting with a normal amount of fear in getting too near a predator’s food. “Still! That even started with a full sentence- you’ll give a good review yet. You are right, in the end my friend. It is a very silly song.”
Then they dropped to silence, the wind whistling through the trees, the soft noises as Roach shifted to get to a better patch of browse, and the sounds of food being enjoyed.
“I suppose.” Geralt said, after the last of the sun was gone and they were settling in for the night. “There’s nothing wrong with occasional silly songs. As long as they’re not about me.”
“I make no promises.”
Geralt threw a pinecone at him.
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