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#but he gets so annoyed at dazai's attempt of caretaking
lastdivantruther · 4 months
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don't trust her dazai, she's gonna blackmail you to buy every flavor of ice creams and bully you anytime chuuya is around.
i don't trust my writing to be readable so dialogs under the cut:
Kyouka: Dazai-san, is it true that you're going to die of heartbreak if you have to hide your undying love for big brother any longer?
Dazai, earlier that day: If poor Chuuya hides his undying love for me any longer, I'm afraid he'll die of heartbreak!
Dazai, now: 'Not exactly in those words...'
Kyouka: I don't want you to die. So I decided to help you by acting as your illegitimate child. With this plan big brother will take pity on us and agree to go out with you.
Atsushi, murmuring to himself: Could it work? I mean, I wouldn't fall for it myself ofc, but Chuuya-san seems like a kind person... Would I fall for it?? If Aku had an....
Tsushi and Dazai: 'Isn't that the plot of the TV show from last night?'
Dazai: Kyouka-chan, that's a PERFECT idea!! 🌸
Kunikida, from his desk: No it's fucking not!
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luminara · 5 years
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Soukoku
A Love Like War by psychncislover (37,883 - ongoing)
The city of Yokohama was maintained by two Mafia Families. When an enemy targets the Nakahara Family, they find their only hopes lies in an alliance... with their greatest enemy, the Tsushima Family. But their help comes with a price - a marriage between the two heirs! Will both sides survive not only this enemy, but each other?
Only Human by TheGeatCatsby (62,143 - complete)
Shortly after the defeat of Mimic, Dazai Osamu leaves the Port Mafia. Wanting to take advantage of the situation, the government sends Nakahara Chuuya to gain his trust.
carve your love into my skin by Dont_Wake_The_Writer (64,820 - ongoing)
Chuuya looks underneath Dazai's bandages without his permission. What he finds underneath changes everything.
can the city forgive by erytheia (27,658 - ongoing)
Chuuya knows he’s so so close, fingertips just barely brushing the possibilities between them. But Dazai’s the one calling the shots again, and he’s yanking it away, out of Chuuya’s grasp, taking absolute control before Chuuya even knows he’s given it up. Every single facet of their relationship is one-sided, both of them too blind and too stubborn to stop for a second and consider what’s on the other side of the wall between them before they try to tear their way through it.
A Dandy In The Underworld by idontevenlogic (72,606 - ongoing)
Dazai presented the white candle with one hand and stretched his other hand out towards Chuuya. “My life to defend until your bitter end! Through the fire and iron of Hell, I order you to walk with me! I name you—”
Dazai’s eyes fluttered open as a tired smile spread across his lips at the sight of Chuuya’s impossibly stormy eyes widening with the realization of what specific spell the executive was performing. Nearly falling, the Wellspring altered his course in an attempt to flee from the range of the spell, but the power of the sigil’s pull had already latched onto him like a noose and began to pull him back towards Dazai, despite his wounded hollering and ceaseless writhing.
“—I name you, Nakahara Chuuya, my familiar!”
* * *
Or: Nakahara Chuuya returns to Yokohama and is forced into aiding the Port Mafia in helping them capture a mysterious, dangerous hacker from a checkered past. Along the way, he has to adjust to his new life as the familiar to the most infamous warlock in all of Yokohama: the one and only Dazai Osamu.
of bells, coffees, and love in between by KyuBaisu (40,398 - complete)
Chuuya just wants to eat with his sister, but he ends up wearing a gown, make-up, and high-heels in a fake wedding.
Dazai just wants to see the girl from the advertisement he did years ago, the girl with the ginger hair, blue eyes, and a never disappearing annoyed expression.
A Collision of Fates by dgalerab (83,603 - complete)
Dazai Osamu has always known his fate - to become the vessel of the Hollow God, a god hellbent on reuniting with Its lover, the Tainted God, and wreaking havoc on the world.
But that doesn't mean he can't try going on a last ditch effort of a quest trying to stop it from happening.
hide the truth by writingfromtheshadows (24,611 - complete)
When Chuuya wakes up in the middle of an ongoing fight without any memory of how he got there or what happened to him, he ends up turning to someone saved as 'bandage-waster' in his phone. Somehow, it just feels like the right decision.
Gifted by TheGreatCatsby (28,863 - ongoing)
The government's experiments with genetics to induce "gifts" in children is a well-kept secret. Dazai is sent to infiltrate one of the facilities and gather information. He is assigned to be the nurse of one of the facility's oldest and most successful experiments.
Message Received by hellosweetie17 (26,579 - ongoing)
Late for work, Chuuya collides with a stranger on the sidewalk. A stranger who happens to be annoying, frustrating, flirtatious, and even worse—gorgeous. Thanks to a tricky sleight of hand, their encounter leads to Chuuya texting the wrong number.
Dazai Osamu begrudgingly finds happiness (It's a long road) by BlueFlameSakura (34,810 - ongoing)
Dazai Osamu had never even dreamt  about this happening to him, not even his worst nightmares could compare to this. To being married off to some stupid alpha prince as a mockery of a peace offering.
North- and South-Yokohama had been at war for several centuries now, and as much as the brunette would like a bit more of the tranquility peace between their nations would provide, couldn't it have been done with someone else? Or in another few decades?
Well, apparently not.
How to Hornswoggle Death by SecretlyACatLady (20,544 - ongoing)
This wasn't what Chuuya had in mind when he hoped for a big haul. ----- In which Chuuya is a fisherman with an adventurous past and Dazai is a merman who tries to bully Chuuya into killing him.
keep you alive, set you on fire by flyby (23,574 - complete)
Dazai steps out in a dress and heels for a mission, since the gown won't fit Yosano. He's only supposed to spend an hour or so leading their targets on a dance around a charity gala, but the unexpected arrival of a certain Port Mafia Executive threatens to disrupt all his plans. And when he and Chuuya find themselves finally face to face, they end up entwined in a tense game of mutual provocation...
bad enough for you by Maristella (28,555 - complete)
There are two reasons why Chuuya tolerates Dazai: 1.) The god inside Chuuya hates him; 2.) Chuuya definitely hates the god more than the stinking demon mackerel.
Or, alternatively, that one time Dazai and Chuuya swaps abilities, and Arahabaki was never the same.
360 degrees by setosdarkness (11,060 - complete)
Chuuya gets cursed by an Ability that forces him to eternally live out his biggest regret. Unlike the other victims who end up killing themselves or hurting others, Chuuya goes into a coma.
For his biggest regret is—
[groundhog day AU with a twist, where Chuuya relives the day Dazai leaves the Port Mafia over and over and over and over]
black /// reciprocity set by setosdarkness (3,363 - complete)
Soulmate AU where your soulmate mark will only appear on your skin once you’ve fallen in love with your soulmate.
Chuuya has Dazai’s name on his neck while Dazai’s skin is bare of any names.
partners by setosdarkness (27,746 - ongoing)
Chuuya realizes that he’s been married to Dazai since they’re 15: The Fic.
Featuring: wedding fairs, faked marriage registries, angry calls to newspaper agencies for unsolvable crosswords, fake leather couches, love epiphanies and falling in love, not necessarily in that order.
This Way Lies Madness by setosdarkness (41,338 - ongoing)
It’s supposed to be simple. Go in, hand over the questionnaires, wait a few minutes, take the answered questionnaires, get the fuck out. Chuuya should have known, with his shitty luck, that nothing’s ever going to be simple for him.
(—the one where Chuuya inadvertently catches the attention of quite possibly the worst serial killer in history, Dazai) (—police-trainee!Chuuya, inmate!Dazai)
our hearts steeped in hate by setosdarkness (10,202 - ongoing)
Needing to kiss your soulmate to stay alive sounds romantic in context, but absolutely shitty in reality if you’re bound to someone you despise with all your heart and soul.
The act of being human by purplesan (31,457 - complete)
‘This is Chuuya Nakahara, your new caretaker.’ his mother stated. Dazai’s eyes only widened in shock.
‘A robot?’
‘Kind of a degrading term, but yes; a robot.’
Dazai’s glaring only intensified. ‘I don’t need some pathetic excuse of a toy as a caretaker. No one can replace Odasaku anyway. Couldn't you have gotten me a pet instead?’
Chuuya didn’t seem to be affected by Dazai’s insults, which only showed how very non-human he actually was.
‘Stop behaving like a spoiled brat! We could have sent you to a clinic the moment you decided to behave like this, but instead we spent a lot of money on getting you this expensive solution.’
‘You could have spent more money on getting protection for Odasaku.’
(In which all 7 year-old Dazai really wants is to get back Odasaku, but gets Chuuya instead. Though in the end, perhaps the hatrack isn't all that terrible)
chuuya is red hot and dazai is so not by toriosaurus (12,040 - complete)
Dazai couldn't wrap his brain around it. How could the student population think that Chuuya Nakahara was more attractive than him? And, alright, sure, maybe professors shouldn't get caught up in petty drama. But to Dazai, this wasn't just drama. This was war. A war in which he was not going to lose.
The wooing art by holdinglucy (20,940 - complete)
The one where Dazai ended up with more tattoos than he intended to. Or:
Dazai's attempts at wooing the very hot, very dangerous tattoo artist he's just met.
Wrapped up in You by quinnlocke (100,935 - complete)
Chuuya just wants to get through his day as a reptile expert, but there's a bandaged lunatic in his reptile house trying to get murdered by his snakes.
Saving the man's life is a courtesy, taking him home is just asking for trouble.
still still still by toriosaurus (112,578 - complete)
Finally, Chuuya eloquently said, “I don’t want to date you.” Dazai huffed. “Yeah, well, I’m not too thrilled at the idea of having a crazy rockstar boyfriend. But you got us into this mess, you need to help us get out of it.” Had Dazai gone insane? Nakahara Chuuya and Dazai Osamu, dating? Had Chuuya not made it clear through the dozens of direct and indirect meetings that he despised Dazai with every fiber in his body.
Featuring: drunk tweets, falling in love, horrendous song writing, cheesy interviews, learning how to "fake it," and Chuuya getting over the headache that is Dazai. Not necessarily in that order.
where your loyalties lie by writingfromtheshadows (163,126 - complete)
Loyalty is the foundation of the yakuza code, something that was drilled into Chuuya at an early age. However, his lessons did not cover how to manage a political marriage with his organization's oldest rival.
color theory by setosdarkness (2,469 - complete)
Soulmate AU where your heart glows whenever you’re with your soulmate. The color of the glow depends on your feelings for them.
(the one where Chuuya and Dazai make sure to wear layers and layers of clothes and/or bandages just so they can hide their feelings.)
A Heat of Convenience /// A Mark of Inconvenience by dgalerab (19,902 - complete)
PART 1: Yosano won't give Dazai suppressants unless he can prove he's having a healthy amount of heats. Dazai tries to outsmart her. He fails. Chuuya picks up the slack.
PART 2: Dazai gets used to his new arrangement with Chuuya as his heat partner by forcing Chuuya to claim him. It works both better and worse than he expected.
centrifugal/centripetal by TopHat69 (154,138 - ongoing)
[No Summary Available] A/B/O Dynamics
A Catspaw in the Wolf Court by dgalerab (58,357 - complete)
Prince Dazai, a single werecat in a court of wolves, is to be married off to Prince Chuuya, a fox in the kingdom that accepts everyone. He's given one instruction: bring back a defector to the wolves and topple Chuuya's kingdom from the inside.
Things, of course, get more complicated than that.
Counting the Days by Neiro Gin (Neiroa) (23,575 - complete)
How will a certain bandage-wearing ex-Mafioso detective react to hearing that his former partner-who-is-definitely-not-more-than-that has…
…a girlfriend?
“He has been all lovey-dovey with her ever since they came back together!”
“No way! How could any girl fall for that short hat rack?”
“I heard she’s glued to him every single minute of the day. He seems to really like her as well! I’ve never seen him so sweet to anybody!”
“Even if—and that’s a BIG if—she loves him, he’s not the type to just fall in love after only knowing someone for a short amount of time.”
“She’s French.”
“…”
“D-Dazai-san? Dazai-san?!”
Countdown by setosdarkness (31,175 - ongoing)
Eternally-single Chuuya is dared by his friends to date someone. Chuuya eventually agrees, but adds a condition: if the guy he chooses breaks up with him within 10 days, it will suffice as proof that Chuuya’s not meant for dating and therefore his friends will stop nagging at him about his non-existent lovelife.
Thinking that it’s an easy win, Chuuya chooses to date Dazai, his asshole childhood friend who’s known to be a serial womanizer.
Chuuya... is very wrong.
don't you ever tame your demons by writingfromtheshadows (108,592 - complete)
Every year, a handful of children are born with the ability to command supernatural powers. Thousands of dollars and dozens of trained specialists are tasked with identifying, tracking down, and labeling each one as Deviant. Once identified, they have no rights other than those that are permitted to them, and disobedience is a crime punishable by death.
Chuuya has never known a life outside of the routine he's forced to follow, but when the boss of Yokohama's Port Mafia offers him a chance of freedom, Chuuya is not prepared for the rebellion he's stumbling into.
Chuuya Nakahara and the Falling Camelia by Anonymous (12,628 - ongoing)
A new year begins at Hogwarts, and between a nervous wreck of a first year Chuuya met over the summer managing to become Akutagawa's arch enemy upon their first meeting, a pair of second year's younger sisters' complicating things, and leftover tension with Tachihara, Chuuya is in for a hectic term.
Things take a turn for the worse, however when there are rumors about a man eating were tiger, Dementors -- unspeakable creatures who bring back horrible memories and can steal your very soul -- surrounding Hogwarts as wardens and watchmen, and a murderer breaks out of Azkaban, a high security prison in the wizarding world.
Especially when that murderer is dead set on getting his hands on Dazai.
Chuuya Nakahara and the Chambers of Draconia by Anonymous (51,820 - complete)
After a first year full of questions, Chuuya barely gets a moment to breathe before his second year proves the last to be gentle in comparison. With tension among friends and the looming threat of an unknown danger, he'll need all of the clues he can get -- not just for the safety of the school, but for the strength of his friendships.
Madder Aubrieta by hypermoyashi (21,790 - ongoing)
Flowers bloomed, rain fell, and the whims of nature dictated all. This was the status quo that Chuuya knew, and it was a surprisingly delicate order. Change came in the form of a mysterious man he found, woken from an ageless sleep by none other than Chuuya himself.
Margin of Error /// Scale of Success by izanyas (31,416 - complete)
PART 1: After a failed assassination attempt on his person, Dazai finds himself recovering in an unfamiliar place: a hospital where criminals abound, staff and patients alike, and Dazai's own doctor is a little too attractive.
PART 2: Dazai makes due on his promise. Chuuya has to revise his.
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