Tumgik
#cause i know how much it makes ME personally die when i go to read smth
ewanmitchellcrumbs · 2 days
Note
I know you are tired of being reminded of the whole mess that’s been going on. I had no idea what was going on until foxyanon told me cause I asked. The shock that went through me when I was reading ems post. I was decent friends with bel and interacted a lot with her. Had no idea how vile those bloggers are, just damn right disgusting and rude. But I told em as well that I have nothing to do with what’s her face. I’m always here for you! This fandom needs some serious work done and rethinking. I’m screaming the biggest f you to her! I love your content even though I don’t say anything much. You’re wonderful and deserve better! 💗💗
Thank you for reaching out, and treating me like a human being. It is more than I currently deserve. I will place the rest of my response beneath a cut, as it will be quite long and I'd like to give people the option to scroll past, as they are doubtless tired of all of this, and rightly so.
Yes, the behaviour of that group is despicable, but I cannot downplay the gravity of my own in that.
I had a longstanding block with two users (I am not going to use their online nicknames, I do not deserve to), arcielee and sylasthegrim, I said disgusting things about both of them - the screenshots of my messages regarding them both on the post you have doubtless all seen are real (so is the final screenshot where I mention an anon I had received telling me to die in my sleep, the rest of the screenshots in that post have been falsified, doctored or snipped heavily out of context to make them appear hateful - the doctoring has been confirmed by two individuals well versed in Photoshop)
I hold my hands up and apologise to both those people, and the people that have seen those messages and been harmed by them. They are inexcusable, indefensible and were guided by a false belief that those two people were being hateful in turn about me, and actively going out of their way to harm and spite me. I am unsure what Bel thought she had to gain by exacerbating the animosity between me and Em and those two women, regardless, we should have done the mature thing and reached out directly to them. I will say, that I have never once sent anonymous hatred to either person. The extent of my vitriol was confined to that group chat.
Bel also used slurs in the group chat (I would like to point out that myself, Em and Fae did not). I won't repeat what these were. I do not want those ugly words on my page. They made me uncomfortable and I called her out any time she used one in particular, but she always laughed off my discomfort and carried on anyway. She is mixed race, I am white, in my mind it is not my place as a white person to tell an ethnic minority what is racism and what isn't. There are enough white voices shouting down others in online spaces. I know better now. I should not let my own discomfort silence me. I will call out hatred, bigotry and discrimination in every instance that I see it. My past inaction is embarrassing, it's offensive and I am devastated by the hurt I have caused to others. I am so deeply sorry.
I didn't speak up for a long time, because I have seen what these people are like when they have a grudge against someone. It's frightening, I was a coward. Yet despite staying silent on all of it, I have been doxxed just the same. I suppose perhaps that's karmic retribution?
I appreciate that people have felt my response has been lacking, however, I was out of the country, away from home, from the 14th until the 22nd, with only my phone at my disposal and with the expectation from my husband that I would enjoy the vacation we were on, and not be online dealing with all of this.
I would like the opportunity to atone for my behaviour, to make amends. Currently, I feel I am not going to be given the opportunity to do that, and understandably so. Emotions are high, people are raw from what they have learned and they do not feel comfortable being around me.
Seeing the screenshots of the people in their group passing around my personal photos and saying incredibly vile things about my appearance triggered a lapse with the eating disorder that I am in active recovery for. I then had another a few days later. I need to take some time away to get myself well, as the fear and anxiety of all of this is taking its toll. I also need the space to deal with the legal action I will be exploring with regards to Chris having doxxed me. I am not running away. I simply need to get myself into a space where I am stable enough to handle all of this, be accountable, and take responsibility without my own emotions diminishing other people's.
I know people hate me right now, but it pales in comparison to how much I hate myself. I am so very sorry for allowing this to happen.
31 notes · View notes
ancuninfiles · 23 days
Text
Bite Night
Tumblr media
Gif by @astarionposting
18+ MDNI - M/F - Astarion x Tav (Baldur's Gate 3) - Words: 3.6K
Tags: smut, somnophilia (if you squint), non-consensual vampire bites, blood drinking, enthusiastic consent (sex), vaginal fingering, P in v, creampie, mating press, outdoor sex, soft Astarion, sorcerer Tav, nondescript Tav, Aftercare, idealized version of events, no beta we die like cazador
Summary: It has been 3 days since the nautiloid crash. Tav may be the sweetest person that Astarion has ever met. Night falls, and he is overcome with intense feelings of hunger. Tav sleeps alone, peacefully by the fire. He can hear her pulse from the treeline, and it invites him in. Or... could it be more than her pulse inviting him in?
Sorry, Idk how to write summaries. :,)
Read on AO3
Astarion had never met someone like Tav. She was so kind to him, despite their first meeting beginning with him holding a dagger to her throat after having tricked her into thinking he needed help. It was interesting to note that in retrospect, Tav being a sorcerer, could have easily used Shocking Grasp on him while he held her, pinned beneath his blade. She, instead, was oddly compliant. 
__________
“I saw you on the ship, didn't I? Nod.” Astarion cooed
Tav looked up at him with eyes half-closed and eyebrows knitted together, nodding. A look he could only assume was partially caused by the sun beating down on her face. It was as if she completely surrendered to him, going practically limp in his arms, which made him soften his grip slightly.
“Splendid, and now you're going to tell me what you and those tentacle freaks did to me.” he peered down at her, eyes briefly flicking to her neck and then up to her eyes again. Despite her relaxed form, her pulse was quickened and it was distracting. Astarion's mouth started to water slightly.
“I- I didn't do anything… I was abducted, same as you!” She pleaded.
“Don't lie to me. I- AUGH” Astarion yelped, as a purple aura surrounded both him and Tav. Their minds were suddenly connected, he was able to peer into her thoughts and feel what she was feeling. 
To his surprise, her mind had been focused on compassion towards him, the man holding a blade to her throat. “He and I have the same problem. These tadpoles. And he is likely reeling after all this. He could be a good ally to have.” 
Astarion's mind had then shared broken pieces of his past with Tav. Pieces that he would have rather kept to himself, but nothing incriminating yet. “What was that!? What's going on!?” He raised his voice.
Tav's was panting as if their minds connecting had worn her out. “You saw into my mind, it was the parasites! They connected us.” She said, with her eyebrows still knitted. Her mouth was agape and she took one last big breath before calming her expression. 
Her breath smelled of mint, and her hair smelled like lavender. ‘Gods, her scent, her pulse, her expression. Everything is distracting about her.’ he thought to himself. 
Although he would have loved to hold her for longer, grab her hair and sink his teeth into her flesh, he decided against it. Feeling confident that she was not a threat, he released her. They maintained eye contact with one another as they both slowly stood up.
‘She wants to be my ally’ he thought to himself.
__________
They had picked up a couple more allies on their misadventure so far. A cleric with an odd name and an annoying wizard who talks too much. Tav seemed naive. She was picking up strays left and right. Were these others to be trusted?
Tav had a way of making everyone feel accepted and comfortable. “If you need anything, please let me know. I don't care if I'm sleeping, reading, or otherwise busy, you can wake me up. I want to help.” she exclaimed to the whole group with an earnest look in her eye. She made sure to look at everyone in their eyes when she said this. 
‘Gods, she couldn't be more sweet. So tempting.’ He thought to himself. He wondered if she would taste as sweet as she acted, but no, he had to stop thinking things like that. Even Tav would surely end him if he were to slightly hint at the fact that he was a monster. 
Besides, Cazador would most definitely flay him for drinking the blood of a thinking creature. Although, the parasite had granted him immunity from the sun. Maybe Cazador can't control him at all anymore.
__________
It was time to settle in for the night. They had an exhausting day looking for a healer, which they had to fight through a hoard of goblins to get to. It had been 3 nights since the nautiloid crash, and Astarion had already snuck off the previous night to find  a boar, which he stupidly left in the middle of the road. Tav and the cleric had fixated on it. The cleric had pointed out that the boar had been left fully intact but without blood. To Astarion's dismay, these stangers were smarter than he initially had thought.
Tav was so exhausted that she had fallen asleep beside the fire, while everyone else left to their tents. She was a powerful ally indeed. Tav and Astarion carried the team, while the wizard was frequently coming within an inch of death and you would have thought the cleric was blind because she missed almost every shot. 'Leave it to Gale to cover the ground in grease and then slip in it and fall prone, himself', Astarion thought.
While everyone was sleeping, Astarion slipped away into a clearing in the woods to have some privacy and decompress after all that's happened, for the first time since the nautiloid crash. Finally able to be alone with his thoughts, Astarion's memories of his master plagued him. It was as if he were there, reciting his rules. 
First, thou shalt not drink of the blood of thinking creatures.
Second, thou shalt obey me in all things.
Third, thou shalt not leave my side unless directed.
Four, thou shalt know that thou art mine.
'Terrifying. So much for being alone with one's thoughts' Astarion thought. He left the clearing in distress, feeling like he was being stalked by Cazador. 'He can't control me anymore, I can walk in the sun...' Astarion told himself, in an effort to calm himself down. A burning feeling climbed up his throat. He was starving. Exerting himself more than usual was likely to blame. He had to find something to eat, soon.
__________
Astarion made his way back to camp, stopping at the tree line to assess the state of the camp. Sweet Tav was still sleeping soundly by the fire. Sweet Tav's words replayed in his head. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. I don't care if I am sleeping". Sweet Tav who had shown him compassion almost immediately after he had pulled a dagger to her throat. Sweet Tav whose breath was minty, whose hair smelled of lavender, and whose pulse sounded so beautiful; hypnotic. 
Astarion snuck close enough to Tav to see her throat, so beautifully exposed. An easy target. Tav was wearing nothing but a thin silky nightgown with small flimsy straps. Her supple legs were exposed and glistened in the firelight. The wind blew and her scent wafted into Astarion's face. 
This was too much for Astarion to bear any longer. He slowly and stealthily climbed atop Tav, making sure not to wake her. He held his breath, he didn't need to breathe anyway. She was lying on her back, so Astarion slotted his leg between her thighs and placed his left elbow on the ground beside her head. He used his right hand to tilt her chin to the side slowly and gently brush her hair away from her pulse point. 'Formalities' he thought. Astarion slowly lowered his open maw onto Tav's throat. Finally puncturing the skin, blood started flowing into his mouth as he latched on almost like a feral animal. Tav's blood was ambrosia, it tasted like nothing he had ever tasted before. It was sweet, but complex like a fine-aged wine.
He could no longer control himself, he was sure to wake her. He tightly grabbed onto Tav's hair with his right fist and pushed her neck into his lips. It was then that he heard a sweet mewl coming from Tav. 'Of course, she would be moaning when a monster is consuming her.' Astarion groaned into her neck and brought his knee flush up to Tav's core. Tav began to writhe beneath him, arching her back and slowly bucking her hips on his knee. She was enjoying this. A desire started building in Astarion's lower abdomen, causing his cock to strain against his pants. 
Astarion continued to take generous gulps of Tav's blood, running his tongue across her pulse point to try and force more blood out, faster. He let loose a primal groan into Tav's throat and then repositioned himself so that his clothed cock was pressing into Tav's exposed cunt. She accommodated Astarion and wrapped her legs around his pelvis with tact and enthusiasm. Tav reached her right hand up to Astarion's curls, but Astarion grabbed her wrist and pinned it beside her head. Tav moaned, but her rutting became slower, as did her pulse. 
"Astarion - I" Tav whispered. Astarion finally came to and unlatched his teeth. His brows knitted together as he licked, and pressed his tongue firmly against her wound to soothe Tav and congeal the blood. He placed a chaste kiss on her neck, and then slowly started releasing her wrist, but Tav let out a breathy whine into his ear and grabbed his left hand, lacing her fingers with his. Perplexed, he looked up at Tav with round eyes. She was gazing at their laced hands. Astarion eyed her fresh puncture marks to make sure the bleeding had seized, and then gently tilted her head to face him. 
Her eyes were wet and filled with lust. Her chest was heaving, her cheeks were flushed, and her pupils were blown out.  "Why did you stop?" Her voice came out breathy, almost a whisper. 
Astarion smirked, "Oh, you sweet, generous thing." 
Tav's left hand came up to touch Astarion's face in a gentle caress while her right hand was still affectionately connected with his left. She eyed his lips, taking in the blood on his chin and swiping it softly with her thumb. Her eyes fluttered back up to meet his gaze, but he was eyeing her lips as she had his. 
Tav's lips were the same colour as her blushing cheeks. They were seductively parted. Astarion's gaze shifted back to Tav's eyes again, as she caressed his face with her thumb. Such a gentle little thing, and after what he had just done to her. He ought to feel shame for taking from her. 'She is so beautiful' he thought. The firelight flickered in her wet, sleepy eyes. Her hair was gorgeously spread amongst her bedroll. She was like an angel, no, a goddess. It was hard to believe she was real, or that someone could even forgive him for what he had done to her, let alone want him to continue. He looked at her with concern in his eyes which were becoming wet themselves.
Tav's hand slithered shakily to the nape of Astarion's neck. "I want you if you'll have me." She smiled earnestly, her eyes curled with her smile like tiny rainbows. She caressed his nape as she did his chin. "Please, Astarion." She sang
His name sounded like a melody on her lips. She was a siren, pulling him in with her song. Pulling him in, to drown in her. Their lips crashed like the waves in the Sea of Fallen Stars. They moaned into each other as their tongues danced around one another's teeth, exploring, and tasting. Astarion didn't want to stop until he had tasted every corner of her maw. Their kiss was bruising and sloppy. Tav made advances with her tongue as well, and she opened her mouth wide enough to let Astarion explore deeply.  Her mouth tasted as minty as it smelled, and his mouth tasted like her blood. He paid extra mind to not hurt her with his fangs. 
One of her hands tangled in his hair and the other hand rested on his back. He pressed his pelvis closer to her's and he groped her soft flesh with one of his hands, hastily exploring her body and reaching under her nightgown to grab her breast. He pinched her nipple and rubbed it between his fingers. Tav let out a higher-pitched moan in his mouth. He snaked his hands down to her exposed and throbbing core. She was unbelievably soaked. Finally lifting his mouth from hers, he looks at her with a smirk and says "You are positively dripping for me, darling." He started rubbing slow circles on her clit and her back arched, seeking more from Astarion.
 She groaned. "I want you inside me, please." Her eyes pleading and her words drifted out in a soft sigh. She was squirming slowly and weakly. The poor thing was so weak from the blood loss.
He peered down at her face which seemed to be blushing more and more, and her skin was now glistening with a thin layer of sweat. "Only because you ask so sweetly." He exclaimed before plunging two digits inside of her, working her open. She hummed in a whiney tone, which only egged him on further. His fingers curled up as he patiently started getting her hole ready for his cock. Her mouth opened and her eyes nearly rolled back into her head. She was the most enchanting creature in all of Faerün. He wanted to do anything for her, and he wanted to bury his cock entirely between her legs.
His free hand pushed her nightgown above her breasts, exposing her naked and writing body to the night air. It hadn't occurred to him until then that they were in the middle of camp. The cleric and the wizard could catch them, but Tav seemed unbothered. Astarion had noticed that his senses were much sharper after drinking Tav's blood. He realized he was confident enough that he would hear anyone coming long before they could see anything. 
His fingers started to pump into her faster, and he palmed her clit. Her breathing became heavy and jagged. "I'm so close! Astarion!" She moaned his name as her pussy fluttered around his digits. He fingered her through her orgasm, only pulling away when she started to twitch at the touch of her clit. She inhaled deeply and let out a groan. Her head fell back and her breasts rose and fell with each exasperated breath. "Hmm, you are wonderful, Astarion." She hummed with a bright smile on her face.
Astarion crept up to meet her eyes with his, "You're unbelievably beautiful." He said sincerely. She looked up at him with her pleading eyes again. He brushed her hair with his fingers and admired her features. He brought her into a molten kiss that both burned and bruised their lips. His hand caressed her naked torso, gripping her in every place he could before landing his strong grasp on her ass. Their kiss flew apart and she let out an exceptionally whiney moan and looked down to where his clothed cock was.
His cock was beginning to strain unbearably against his pants. He expertly unlaced his trousers and his large member sprang free, glistening with precum. He glanced down at her soaking core, her thighs were covered in her cum. He hooked her knees over his biceps and he teased her entrance with his cock. He groaned and exhaled, and looked at her face so he could read her expressions. Her brows scrunched in anticipation.
"Hmmm please fuck me. I want you to fill me up so bad." she sobbed and clenched her jaw. 
Astarion groaned "I love it when you plead for me, little love. Your voice sounds so sweet. Please tell me if you want me to stop, can you do that for me?" 
She bit her lip and looked him in the eye, again with that sweet look on her face. "Mmhm"  she nodded.
He didn't need any more confirmation from her as he slowly sunk his cock into her hole. Her mouth opened slightly and she started breathing heavier. He pulled out all the way and stroked her wetness onto his shaft. He sunk back down into her languidly until he finally was fully inside. He grunted at the feeling, and she was breathing heavier than ever. Her jaw was clenched and her eyes were wet.
"Are you okay, sweet love?" He said with concern as he stilled inside her.
"Mmm yeah. You're just - so big, I've never had someone -reach into me so deeply. It doesn't - hurt, I promise" she spoke softly. Panting throughout her sentence. "It feels, so good" she whined.
His cock twitched at her enthusiasm and she moaned quietly. "Oh darling, I am going to fill you right up," he said as he pulled back and then snapped his hips into her. He leaned down to her and stroked her cheek as he kissed her jaw. "Precious." He whispered in her ear.
He began rutting into her at a consistent pace. She pulled his shirt up to feel more of his skin against hers. She was so warm compared to him, her aura engulfed him like the fire they lay next to, consuming the carbon in a flickering rage. She was so tight, and warm, and wet. He wasn't sure how long he was going to be able to last, but he knew he wanted to make her cum one more time before he finished.
He reached down to her clit, and started rubbing tight quick circles. She moaned between her teeth and the muscles in her legs tensed. Her mouth fell agape and she started panting beautifully. "That's it, good girl. Cum on my cock." 
His words were enough to send her over the edge, and her cunt clenched and fluttered around his cock. He fucked her through her orgasm, only stopping his attention on her nub when she was pulling away. He readjusted her legs atop his shoulders, and her knees were practically beside her head. He was able to reach deeper in her than before, and his cock was hitting her sweet spot at a perfect angle. 
"Do you want me to fill you with my cum, darling? Is that what you want?" He teased as he fucked her mercilessly.
"Yes!" She begged, "Please, I need you to fuck your cum into me!" 
Her lewd suggestion sent him toppling over into his own climax, and he pressed himself deeply into her folded form. Groaning as his head fell to her side, he placed chaste kisses on her neck where he had bitten earlier. She could feel his cock twitching deep inside her, his spend spurting on her walls and dripping down her ass. He pulled out a few inches and then slammed back into her again, stuffing his cock into her deepest depths, making sure that her desires are met and that his seed has thoroughly coated every corner of her tight, quivering hole. 
They stayed connected for many long moments and then eventually they both rolled over to lie on their sides, facing one another. They stared deeply into each other's eyes. Astarion pulled his pants back up, and Tav lay sleepily with her flesh still exposed. "This won't do." He said as he scooped her up with his arms.
"Oh!" She squeaked, as Astarion carried her bridal style to his tent.
He lay Tav down on his bedroll. "One moment, love, I will be right back!" He said with newfound energy.
Astarion searched for one of the most soft fabrics that he had kept for future sewing projects. He found the silky red cloth and he soaked it with water from the river. It was cold, but it will have to do. He made long strides back to his tent to find Tav, who was almost sleeping. 
"This is going to be a bit cold, little bird." He cooed. He then ran the damp cloth along her most vulnerable parts. She hummed sleepily and smiled as he slowly cleaned her up with seemingly the highest degree of care. He then took the same cloth and cleaned himself up briefly. 
The night was warm, but Tav, being alive, was more susceptible to the temperature. He only had his brown boyish blanket in his tent, so he quickly went to Tav's tent and snagged all of her pillows and blankets to bring them back to her in his tent. She was like a sleepy doll. He propped her head up on the softest pillow and covered her body in the warmest blankets. She sleepily hummed with glee, and Astarion looked at her snuggled up in the blankets, admiring his handiwork. 
He changed into a fresh set of night clothes and then joined her under the blankets. He faced her and affectionately brushed his fingers across her cheek and under her ear. His palm rested on her cheek and his thumb stroked her cheekbone. He would speak to her about all this in the morning, and apologize for feasting upon her like a ravenous beast; but for now, she was in his arms and he felt an unyielding desire to take care of her. She nuzzled into him and kissed his hand. He leaned in and placed a kiss on her forehead. She turned around so her backside was facing him. She scooted back to connect with him. His touch was soothing and cool against her under the warm blanket. He froze for a moment at the overwhelming affection, and then he fell into her and held her tight. 
He didn't know exactly what these feelings were, but he knew that this was nice.
They both closed their eyes, and Tav fell into a deep sleep. Astarion began to trance. He didn't know it yet, but this would be the best trance he would have in 200 years.
Author notes:
HEY. Thanks for reading if you made it this far. I actually haven't really ever written anything before, and I don't plan on writing anymore. It took a really long time, and it was way harder for me than I thought. The number of times I had to look at synonyms. Ffs... lol. But YEAH. I actually don't have much of an interest in writing anyways so it's all good. Srsly kudos to any of you who are writing fics, especially the lengthy ones. I have no idea how you do it. Every paragraph is a brain fart for me. Please don't mind any mistakes. I used grammarly, and I TRIED MY BEST LOL. ANYWAYS, LOVE YOU, SMOOCHIES.
499 notes · View notes
Text
Can You Feel My Heart - GF!Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader
This was a request I got over a month ago, and the person that asked for it was very detailed in the things they wanted, and I didn't want to give away the entire fic before anyone read it lmao. If you're the one that requested it, I hope you like it! It's definitely a bigger one, 5.9k words🙃
Tumblr media
I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim
This contains SMUT - Minors DNI
Summary: You were supposed to die in Tara and Sam's apartment, but you never showed. When he tries to finish the job, he realizes that he can't hurt you, and you help him decided to save the rest of your friends.
Contains: Dryhumping? Oral - m & f receiving, p in v, fingering. Nothing too crazy, Ethan's an inexperienced virgin for the most part in this.
A/N: Deadass want to write something where reader makes Ethan cum in his pants💀
Tumblr media
Ethan knew he couldn’t do what his family asked when it came to hurting you, but after hours of Quinn telling Ethan that you’d never want him, and that you would never see him as anything more than a pathetic loser, he’d channeled enough rage towards you to hopefully do the job he was asked to do.
When he popped out of Quinn’s closet that night and killed her flavor of the week, the adrenaline was already pumping through his veins. When he went out to the main area of the apartment, he searched for you. He thought back to the text you sent him about being bummed that he had econ and couldn’t join you and the rest of the friend group, so he knew this was where you were supposed to be. He didn’t let you not being there throw everything off, it just meant Anika had to die before it was originally planned.
He met with his dad before he had to show up at the crime scene and play the roll of the grieving father to explain how everything actually played out.
“She wasn’t there?!” Wayne yelled, as Ethan nodded, his breathing still heavy from all the running to get away from the apartment before anyone had a chance to see him. “Fuck, I thought you had this all planned out!”
“I’m sorry,” Ethan said, “She was supposed to be there. I guess she changed her mind.”
“You’re going to finish the job though, right?” Wayne asked, knowing how much convincing it took to get Ethan to want to kill you in the first place.
“Yeah, I’ll take care of it. I know tomorrow’s supposed to be the end of all this, but I have her schedule memorized. I’ll just break into her apartment before she get’s home from class, kill her, and I’ll meet you at the theater,” he said, as Wayne nodded in approval.
“I knew you wouldn’t let me down.”
The next day, you went to class. You’d heard about another attack but had no idea it was Anika and Quinn. With you backing out of coming over to Tara and Sam’s last minute before the attacks happened, your friends couldn’t help but wonder if you could’ve been the one that caused her death. You were the last person they’d suspect, but they thought it was a little strange.
Finally, Tara called you when you were walking back home after your morning classes.
“Hey, sorry I didn’t come over last night. I was so tired,” you said, as soon as you answered the phone.
“It’s a good thing you didn’t,” Tara said. You immediately heard the sadness in her voice.
“Wait, what happened?” you asked, before you heard Mindy yelling at Tara for calling you in the background. “Tara, what’s going on?”
“The killer came to the apartment last night…Quinn and Anika are dead,” she said, as you were walking through your front door.
“Oh my god,” you said, bracing yourself against the doorway as you took in the news she just told you. “Is Mindy okay?” you asked as you started to get emotional. You weren’t the closest to Anika yet, but you were getting there. You loved her sweet yet sarcastic personality, and you’d recently started to get to know her better from the study sessions with her and Ethan.
“No, not really,” Tara sighed, “Were you really home last night? I hate to ask you because I don’t think you’d do anything like this…but you saying you weren’t coming over last minute was a little suspicious.”
You were taken aback by her accusations, and were about to respond, when you heard the beeping that someone else was calling you. You felt annoyed as you saw the unknown number, quickly declining it before you responded to Tara.
“Tara, I promise you I was at home. I was so tired after class yesterday,” you got out, before you started to get another unknown number call, “Fuck, someone keeps calling me. I’ll text you in a little bit. We’ll figure out who’s doing this.”
“Okay, be safe,” she said, before you ended the call and answered whoever kept calling you.
“Hello?” you asked, the irritation in your voice obvious as you heard a chuckle on the other end of the call.
“I thought you were just going to keep ignoring me.”
You immediately recognized the voice. You’d heard it several times before in the Stab movies, and started to think this was some kind of sick prank.
“Who is this?” you asked, walking towards your kitchen, “Because this isn’t funny.”
“Oh, you sweet, dumb thing,” the person responded, a hint of laughter still in their voice. “I think this is hilarious. You’re all alone in your apartment, no one to save you…”
You tensed up as you glanced around the areas of your apartment that you could see from the kitchen, before inching your way towards the drawer that contained the knives.
“Don’t even think about it,” the voice said, the realization that whoever this was could see you in that moment setting in.
“Who the fuck is this?” you asked, your voice a little shaky as your anxiety kicked in.
“Aww, are you scared?” the voice cooed, “Because you should be.”
That’s when you saw the masked figure darting towards you from your bedroom. You tried to make a run for the front door, but Ghostface was hot on your heels. The knife was shoved in your direction in attempts to slow you down, but the knife penetrated the wood of your door. The killer struggled for a few seconds as they tried to get the knife out, giving you the smallest amount of time to get away from them.
You ran to your living room, searching for anything you could use to help you defend yourself, when you noticed that Ghostface had joined you in the room, holding the knife up as they stared at you.
“Why are you doing this?” you cried. Seeing you like this had Ethan feeling so guilty, but Quinn’s words kept replaying in his head. He didn’t say anything as he charged towards you again. You tried to fight him off, but you were quickly overpowered by him.
He threw you to the ground before he straddled your body. You kept trying to fight, refusing to just give up, even though this person was a lot stronger than you. Both of Ghostface’s hands were wrapped around his knife as they held it over their head, your life literally flashing before your eyes as you waited for it all to be over.
Ethan hesitated, though. The fear in your eyes, your tear-soaked cheeks, and the sobs slipping past your lips were something he knew would haunt him if he went through with this.
“I’m so sorry,” you heard, recognizing the voice as the knife was lowered and clanked on the floor beside you. “I can’t do this to you.”
“Ethan?!” you choked out, gaining enough strength to shove him off you. You used your hands and feet to back yourself closer to the wall, pulling yourself up by the windowsill as he sat on the floor. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!”
“I don’t know,” he cried, pulling the mask over his head and throwing it in frustration. “I can’t do anything right.”
You eyed him as you stood against the wall, watching him cry. You were so shaken up and furious, but you couldn’t help but wonder how Ethan ended up in this position. He was this shy, sweet person that you enjoyed spending time with, and maybe it was your personal feelings towards him, but you felt bad for him.
You walked over to where the knife was, kicking it to the other side of the room under your tv stand. If he had a change of heart and decided he wanted to kill you, you knew him trying to fish that out would give you enough time to escape.
“What the fuck, Ethan?” you sighed, standing beside him as he still sat in his place on the floor. “Why?”
He just kept crying, so ashamed of himself that he got roped into his dad’s plan in the first place. He felt sick, and not just mentally. He was fighting his nausea as you finally crouched down beside him.
“Talk to me,” you said, as he finally looked up at you. He looked scared, his pupils huge as his chin quivered.
“My family is behind all this,” he said, jumping up off the floor as you hesitantly stood up. “Fuck, they’re gonna kill me.”
You started to get nervous all over again as he paced the floor. His hands were shaking, and you couldn’t tell if it was out of fear or anger, but you stepped as far away from him as you could.
“I don’t even understand why you were a part of this in the first place. You didn’t have anything to do with Richie dying,” he ranted, before pausing for a second, “Are you close to your parents?”
You just stared at him, unsure of what to say. This wasn’t the Ethan you knew, and his erratic behavior had a huge lump in your throat.
“I bet your parents love you. I bet they’d never treat you the way my dad treats me,” he said, after you didn’t answer him. “I bet they never make you feel like you’re worthless.”
“You’re not worthless,” you said softly, his head snapping in your direction. You hesitated before speaking again. “Your family is doing this because of Richie? How is he a part of this?”
Ethan stepped towards you, as you backed even further against the wall. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
You shook your head as you looked at him, “You just tried to kill me, Ethan…I’m terrified of you right now.”
“Fuck,” he said, tearing up again. “Richie was my brother. I know you heard the story about Sam stabbing him and slitting his throat,” Ethan paused, you nodded for him to continue, “My dad and sister wanted revenge. I didn’t want to do any of this.”
“Then why did you?” you questioned, as he wiped tears from his cheeks.
“Because my dad told me that it would finally make him proud of me for something…and he said he’d just kill me too if I didn’t help with all this.”
You started to relax against the wall a little as you processed everything. This wasn’t about him wanting to hurt you or anyone else, he just wanted to be loved by the one person that should’ve loved him regardless. He was broken, and even though the voice inside your head kept screaming that you were stupid for wanting to comfort him, your huge heart was breaking for him.
“Ethan,” you said, slowly stepping towards him, “Everything will be okay.”
“No it won’t!” he yelled, making you jump, “Shit, I’m sorry,” he said, noticing that he’d scared you again. He started to speak in a softer tone, “My dad is a fucking detective…even if I try to run away from all of this, he’d just find me.”
You stood there in silence for a few seconds as the realization hit you, “Detective Bailey?” you asked, as he nodded.
“Quinn is a part of this, too. She’s my sister.”
“Ethan…Quinn died last night. This isn’t making sense,” you said, as he scoffed.
“She’s not dead…I wish she was, though. I fucking hate her.”
You both stood in silence for a few minutes, the only sounds heard in the room was his heavy breathing and the occasional sob he’d let out…and the pounding in your chest but you were sure only you could hear that.
“I know you probably hate me right now, and I’m so sorry that I scared you like that. You didn’t deserve it,” he finally said, his eyes connecting with yours. “I’d rather my own life be over than take yours.”
“Your life isn’t over,” you said, as he started to awkwardly laugh.
“It is, though. I still helped with this. I’m going to spend the rest of my life in prison.”
“Not if you stop all this. You can still do the right thing,” you said, his eyes growing wide at your suggestion. “I’m the only person that knows…I won’t say anything.”
He looked at you in disbelief, unsure if you were serious or if you just had a really good poker face.
“I do have another question, though,” you said, walking closer towards him, until he was right in front of you. “Why didn’t you kill me?”
You wanted to pull him into a hug. You wanted him to feel like he was cared about. But you really needed to know why he changed his mind last minute before you did anything.
“I uhm…” he said, trailing off as he tried to find the right words to say, “I really like you, You’re just so sweet, and you’re always showing interest in the things I like, even if you don’t understand it. Quinn tried to make me hate you enough to do it, but I couldn’t.”
“So…Quinn tried to convince you to kill me?” you asked, a little confused. You’d spent plenty of time with her at Sam and Tara’s. You now knew that her kindness towards you was all an act, but you didn’t understand why she thought you needed to die.
“Yeah, she knew how I felt about you,” he said, glancing at the floor as his cheeks started to turn a rosy pink. “She said you’d never want to be with me. That doesn’t matter, though. That wasn’t a good enough reason for me to finish the job.”
“Is that all I am to you? A job?” you half-joked, as he started to smile, looking back up at you.
“Not at all.”
You both just stared at each other as he started to calm down. His eyes were red from all the crying, the guilt for even trying to hurt you painted on his face, but you still grabbed his hands and pulled him close to you.
“It’s going to be okay, Ethan. I’ll help you get through this,” you said, as your hands comfortingly ran over his back. He relaxed into your touch, but he was still a little shocked that you didn’t hate him at that moment.
“Are you okay?” he softly asked, “I know I slammed you on the floor pretty hard.”
“I’m still pissed at you, but I’m okay,” you said, as you started to pull away. He held onto you tighter, not wanting to let you go just yet. “Ethan,” you said sternly, “We need to talk about something else.”
“Sorry…you have no idea how long it’s been since I’ve had affection like this,” he mumbled against you, before pulling away. “I’m really fucked up, aren’t I?”
“I might be a little fucked up, too. I want to make you feel better after you tried to kill me,” you said, as he shook his head.
“You’re not fucked up, you’re perfect.”
You grabbed his gloved hand and led him over to the couch. He realized that he was still wearing the robe and pulled it off, tossing it on the floor before he sat down beside you. Your eyes connected with his as you slid the gloves off his hands and threw them on top of the robe.
“I know your family has their plans, but we need to save the rest of our friends,” you said, his heart pounding when you said the word ‘we’.
“No, you can’t help. I can’t let anything happen to you. I’ll take care of it,” he said, as your hands still held onto his. He looked down at them, before looking back up at you. “You mean a lot to me, even if you don’t feel the same way I do.”
You smirked at him as your thumbs rubbed against the top of his hands, “I never said I didn’t feel the same way you do.”
The tension was building up as you just looked at each other. He wasn’t the most experienced, and you knew that, so you decided to make the first move. You leaned in and gently kissed him before you pulled away. He had a sweet smile on his lips, his cheeks pink, but he wanted more.
He gained a little confidence, leaning forward to kiss you. It wasn’t a simple peck like yours was, as his lips needily moved against yours. Your head was spinning as he pushed you back on the couch, his body hovering over yours as you ran your tongue across his bottom lip. He gasped at the feeling, giving you the opportunity to slip your tongue in his mouth. He didn’t know what to do at first, but soon enough, his tongue was moving with yours.
After a few minutes, he pulled away so you could both catch your breath. He was panting on top of you, a small gasp slipping out of your mouth as he adjusted his hips to get more comfortable in his place between your legs.
You started to get a little lost in thought, wondering if you were crazy. You didn’t expect to be making out with Ethan after he held a knife over you and scared you more than you’d ever been, but it just felt right.
You grabbed his shirt and pulled him back down to kiss you. The grip you had on his shirt relaxed, your fingertips gently running down his chest. He started to tense up a little when your hands reached his stomach, a small groan slipping into your mouth at the feeling. He didn’t pull away from you, the kiss only getting more intense as he started to grind against you.
“Fuck,” you mumbled against him, before nudging him back. “My bed is a lot more comfortable…just saying.”
“Okay,” he said, trying to catch his breath.
After both of you stood up, you could see how hard he was in his jeans. He subtly tried to cover it with his free hand, his other hand laced with yours as you led him to your room.
It got a lot harder for him to hide it once you pushed him back on your bed. You glanced at it before you straddled him, his cheeks turning pink, yet again.
“You keep blushing,” you said, as you started to roll your hips. “Is this okay?”
“Yes,” he spat out, so quickly that you started to giggle. “Please don’t stop.”
Your hips kept moving as he placed his hands on them, pulling you closer to him. You gasped at the friction it was giving your clit, your panties getting more soaked by the second. He was starting to groan, his mouth falling open as his eyes fluttered shut.
“Okay, we need to stop,” he said, his breathing heavy as his eyes snapped open. “You’re going to make me cum in my pants.”
“Would you rather cum in my mouth?” you asked, your eyes looking deep into his. He didn’t know what to say, because he was so embarrassed that just you grinding against him was enough to almost bring him over the edge. He knew the second you put him in your mouth, he’d cum on the spot. You could tell he was nervous, his hands feeling a little shaky as he held onto you. “It’s okay, baby. We can stop.”
“No, I want to…I just don’t want you to be disappointed,” he sighed, turning his eyes away from your gaze. “Whatever we do, I know I won’t last long.”
“Ethan, I know you’re a virgin. I don’t expect you to last long.” He started to get flustered, hating the fact that his inexperience was so obvious. “It’s okay. If you want me to make you feel good, I will.”
“Shit,” he mumbled, “Okay, we can do it.”
You smirked as you slid off him and started to unbutton his jeans. He lifted his hips as you slid them down a little, the wet spot on his boxers from his precum making your mouth water even more than it already was. He sharply inhaled the second you grabbed his cock out of his boxers, his hips jolting forward at the simple action.
“Relax, baby,” you said softly as you leaned down to take him in your mouth.
You were trying to tease him a little, just swirling your tongue against his tip, when his hips jerked forward again. His cock hit the back of your throat, making you gag around him.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” he whined, his chest heaving at the feeling, “I didn’t mean to do that.”
You just kept gagging around him, intentionally making your mouth more wet for him before you started to bob your head. His hands tightly gripped your comforter as you sucked, the feeling better than he could’ve ever imagined. He was trying so hard to hold back, but you made it impossible for him. His groans turned to whimpers as you started to stroke what you couldn’t fit in your mouth. You knew he was close when he started to babble, only recognizing the words ‘Perfect’ and ‘So good’.
His hips started to rut forward again, his legs shaking as one of his hands went to your hair. He tightly gripped it as the feeling washed over him, his salty cum filling your mouth. After his hips stopped thrusting, you swallowed and slid him out of your mouth.
You sat there for a minute after you pulled away, watching him fully come back down from his high. He felt your gaze on him as he slowly opened his eyes and smiled at you.
“That was…fuck,” he sighed, pulling you closer to him. “Can we do that again sometime?”
“I hope so,” you said, as you started to think about what Ethan had to do. “When is everything else supposed to happen, like with the Ghostface stuff?”
You sat up a little to look at him as you waited for his answer. “Shit, if I’m going to stop it, I need to get to the theater,” he sighed, pulling his boxers and jeans back over his hips. “Can we finish this later?”
“Of course,” you said, fully sitting up on your bed. “I want to come with you.”
“No, I’m not losing the girl I’m in love with,” he said, jumping off the bed and landing on his feet. He paused when he realized what he said. “I guess you know how I really feel in case I don’t make it out of this alive.”
“I’m not staying here and worrying about you all night,” you said, sliding off your bed. “Do you know the theater well?”
“Yeah, but you’re not coming!” He was starting to get irritated, but he knew with your persistence that you were coming with him whether he liked it or not. “You could get killed, babe. I can’t keep you safe and take down dad and Quinn at the same time.”
“If they already think I’m dead, don’t you think that would be helpful?” you asked, “I’ll get our friends out before anything happens to them.”
“Fuck, okay. But we need to leave right now.”
You were hoping you could catch your friends before they made it inside the theater, but you peaked around the side of the building as soon as they were going in.
“There’s a back way, just let me scope it out for Quinn first,” he said, as the two of you walked around the old theater. He slid the robe back on and covered his face with the mask before he turned to look at you. “Wait here,” he said, before he opened the door and walked inside.
You were outside for a while before you heard screaming and Ethan’s voice booming on the other side of the door. You didn’t know what was going on, you even started to think that he’d decided to go through with the original plan, after all. You screamed once the masked figure walked out, the bloody knife in their hand.
“It’s okay, babe. It’s me,” he said, reaching for your hand. You hesitantly took his hand in yours as he led you inside, noticing a huge pool of blood on the floor.
“Is that…Quinn?” you asked, noticing the body hunched over in the corner.
“Yeah, we don’t have much time. Dad will be here soon,” he said, leading you down the hallway towards the museum-like display.
You bumped into Chad and Tara when you came around a corner. They both froze when they saw you, your hand still in Ethan’s.
“It was you?” Tara asked, as your eyes went wide, realizing how this all looked.
“No, but we need to get you guys the fuck out of here,” you said, motioning for Tara to come with you. They both stood in their spot as Chad glanced around, looking for something Tara could defend herself with as he tried to take down the masked person. “I’m fucking serious! We have to go!”
“Please just listen to her,” Ethan said, as Chad and Tara looked at each other. “I know how this looks, but you need to go with her. I’ll get Sam and Kirby out next.”
“Why should we trust you?” Chad asked, as Ethan lifted the mask off.
“I’m trying to do the right thing…and it’ll all be for nothing if you don’t go with her. Please, my dad’s on his way,” he sighed, as Chad hesitantly nodded.
“We can both take her if this is bullshit,” Chad whispered to Tara as she nodded. “You’re going to get Sam and Kirby?” he asked, as Ethan nodded. “Fuck, let’s go.”
You led them down the hall as Ethan made his way into the theater to search for the other two. Once you got closer to where Quinn was, you warned them.
“Try not to freak out, but there’s a body around the corner,” you said, noticing the blood spreading across the hall.
“What the fuck is going on?” Chad finally asked, “Whoa, who is that?”
You turned to face them, the confusion on their faces obvious when they noticed the red hair.
“That’s Quinn, she never died. Detective Bailey is in on this,” you said, before trying to think of the best way to explain Ethan without telling them his involvement. “Ethan is Quinn’s brother. He figured all this out today, and he wanted to stop it.”
“Oh,” was all Tara said, as you led them out the back door.
The three of you waited outside for a while. Tara was starting to freak out, the concern for her sister’s safety made her want to go back inside.
“Where the fuck are they?” Chad asked, as he heard Sam start to yell for Tara from the front entrance.
You ran around to the front of the building, panic setting in when you saw Sam and Kirby, but no Ethan.
“What happened?” you asked, peaking around them, hoping to see him walk out behind them.
“We didn’t believe Ethan at first…until he started to fight Detective Bailey,” Sam said, noticing the sadness in your eyes as your thoughts ran wild. “He’s okay, he’s in the ambulance over there.”
“Oh my god,” you said, running over to him. He smiled at you as you crawled into the back, your anxiety fading once you saw he was okay. “I forgot to tell you something earlier,” you said, sitting down beside him. You leaned in to kiss him, mumbling “I love you, too,” against his lips before you pulled away.
You were soon joined in the back by a paramedic, who was looking over a huge gash on Ethan’s arm that you didn’t see before, the blood unnoticeable with the black robe he was still wearing.
“Oh shit,” you said, looking at it. “How hurt are you?”
“This is it,” he said with a smile, before wincing at the numbing medication being injected into his arm. “That burns.”
You were shocked after he was all stitched up and one of the new detectives on the case said he was good to go, but that he’d just need to come down to the police station the next day. Ethan looked over to you, silently thanking you for keeping your word and not ratting him out. You knew he was wrong for doing what he did to Anika, but it was so easy for it to be pinned on his dead dad.
“Thank you, Ethan,” Sam said, as he hopped out of the back of the ambulance. “We’re going back to our apartment. You guys want to come?”
You and Ethan exchanged your glances as he took your hand in his.
“No, I think we’re going to…uh, hang out?” he said, like it was a question. It made you giggle as Chad curiously eyed him. He stopped Ethan before the two of you walked away, discreetly pulling a condom out of his wallet.
“Just in case you need it,” he said, as Ethan nodded and slid it into the front pocket of his jeans.
“Thanks, dude.”
Once you made it back to your apartment, you couldn’t figure out if you were with the same nervous Ethan from earlier in the day. He had you out of your clothes in minutes, your bare back against the plush comforter as he trailed kisses down your stomach. His hands were inching up your thighs as he pushed them apart.
He moved lower, groaning at the sight of your soaked pussy before he started to place gently kitten licks to your clit. You started to moan as his tongue moved faster, your hand tangling in his curls to encourage him, as if your moaning wasn’t already doing that enough. Once he moved his tongue a little lower and swirled it inside of you, your hips involuntarily jolted, much like his did earlier in the day. When your hips kept moving, he pinned them down with his free hand as he kept lapping at the wetness dripping out of you.
“Shit, Ethan,” you moaned, which only made him go faster.
His mouth worked you closer to the edge when he pulled away. You whined at the loss of contact, knowing how close you were getting to your orgasm. He wasn’t going to let it slip away, instead using his fingers and curving them inside you.
“Right there,” you whimpered once he brushed his fingers over the spongy spot inside of you.
His fingers firmly pressed as they moved, his tongue moving back up to lick fat stripes across your swollen clit. The orgasm you were so close to having was quickly approaching again, your hips still trying to buck against him as he struggled to hold them down. Your vision was getting hazier by the second, your whimpers getting louder as your legs started to shake.
“Fuck, I’m cumming,” you whined, as your pussy started contracting around his fingers.
He pulled his mouth away from your clit to have a better view of your face as his fingers slowed inside of you. You were a panting mess as you came back down, your eyes hooded as your hands reached for him.
“Don’t take this wrong because that was amazing, but that wasn’t what I expected,” you said, your breathing still labored as he snuggled up beside you. “I didn’t really have to tell you what to do at all.”
He started to laugh to himself as his hand reached over to run along your naked body, “I guess it just came to me. I knew moaning meant I was doing something right.”
“You did everything right, fuck,” you sighed, feeling his hand run over one of your breasts, gently pinching your nipple between his fingers. “No pressure, but if you want to have sex, we can.”
“Seriously?” he asked, sitting up a little to look at you.
“Yeah, I know you already have a condom,” you said, running your hand over the pocket of his jeans. “Chad should really be a little less obvious.”
“He just wanted me to be prepared,” he sighed, sliding the condom out of his pocket.
He crawled off the bed to take his jeans off. You started to giggle as he climbed back up, the tent in his boxers obvious as he sat on his knees and looked at you.
“Those have to come off, too,” you said, as he started to blush. His hesitance made you roll your eyes as you sat up and leaned over, shimmying his boxers down his hips. “You have nothing to be self-conscious about,” you said, as his cock stood at attention right in front of your face.
You grabbed the condom off the bed beside you and opened it. He intently watched you as you rolled it on his length, the feeling making his breath hitch in his throat.
“Please don’t hate me if this doesn’t last long,” he said, as he got settled between your legs.
“No pressure,” you assured him, as he started to push inside of you, stretching your walls.
He took it slow, at first. His hands teasingly roamed the areas of your body he could reach, the tickling feeling only building your anticipation up even more. Once he got through the initial fear of cumming too quickly, he started to move a little faster. His bottom lip was in between his teeth as he looked down at you, your tits jiggling with each thrust. He held on to one of them as his other hand went to your hip, holding you in place as his thrusts sped up.
He started to groan as he fucked into you, his cheeks red as his mouth hung open. You could tell he was trying to hold back, his mind somewhere else as he tried to distract himself. You moved one of your hands to your clit, rubbing quick circles as your other hand grabbed onto his arm.
“Baby,” you moaned out, as he started to focus on you again. “Go a little faster, I’m close.”
“Shit,” he groaned, snapping his hips into yours. You started to move your hips to meet his thrusts, the feeling of the tip of your cock repeatedly hitting your g-spot had you teetering on the edge.
You let out a loud moan as the euphoric feeling washed over you, your skin tingling as your pussy clenched him. His eyes started to flutter as his thrusts started to falter, a whimper slipping past his lips as he started to fill the tip of the condom. He stilled inside of you as you just kept tightening around him, his head hanging as he caught his breath.
“God, babe,” he said, sliding out of you. “I just want to stay inside you all the time.”
You giggled at him as he laid down beside you. “Is it that good?”
“You have no fucking idea.”
You were starting to get some post-nut clarity as you laid your head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. He’d killed three people in one day and tried to kill you. You were still so proud of him for saving the rest of the people you cared about, even if he had his little psychotic tendencies. You made a mental note to bring up therapy to him once the investigation was over, knowing he needed to work through the daddy issues he ultimately had after years of neglect. You knew that you were going to be by his side the whole way, not wanting him to feel like he didn’t matter ever again.
441 notes · View notes
pureastrologywisdom · 4 months
Text
𝔖𝔬𝔪𝔢 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔪𝔬𝔰𝔱 𝔭𝔬𝔱𝔢𝔫𝔱 𝔰𝔶𝔫𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔶 ℑ 𝔥𝔞𝔳𝔢 𝔢𝔵𝔭𝔢𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔫𝔠𝔢𝔡
Tumblr media
4th house synastry
This in my opinion is some of the most beautiful synastry you can have with someone. When someone has a planet here its going into some of the deepest parts the other persons natal chart.
These people can get very attached to each other. The best planets to have coming into someones else’s 4th house are benefics, the luminaries and your ascendant. You may find if you have malefics in the fourth house it can cause chemistry but more destruction.
I have experienced someones moon go into my 4th house, this was the most beautiful connection. This person feels like the home I have always dreamed of and their arms felt like the safest place on earth. There is a deep and easy understanding of one another's needs and how to comfort one another. The 4th house and the moon are very similar with what they represent in a natal chart. Being with this person is like breathing, its so natural. Its not quite as uncomfortable as 8th house or 12th house synastry, you are still meeting the person in a private place, but instead of them worrying about you exposing things about them, its more like you have a pact where you say ‘your secret is my little secret too’. I will say if someone has come from an unstable home in the past or their childhood, having a fourth house connection can be scary because it can be overwhelming how comforting the other persons feels, as they never had that before.
My ascendant went into this same person 4th house, once again this makes one another easy to understand. Because the 4th house is a more private part of the natal chart having someone ascendant fall here is interesting. It’s as if the 4th house persons recognises the more intimate and private parts of themselves in the ascendant person, they often admire the ascendant persons for expressing things so easily that they find safer to keep behind closed doors.once again the ascendant person makes them feel so comfortable and safe. This synastry with the person honestly hit me harder than others where I has 12th and 8th house synastry. 
4th house synastry makes you feel as if you can see and have a life with someone, they are someone you want to build a life with and support each other from the foundation up.
Venus conjunct mars
THIS ONE! This was very powerful. It’s an immediate connection and instant attraction. It’s one where you can put your finger on it but you cant get this person out your head. I had my Venus conjunct his mars. I felt like a woman around him and I and him feel like a man in the ways we both wanted. There was this flow, a natural give and take. He made me feel so feminine and beautiful. He treat me exactly like I wanted to be treated and he courted me exactly how I wanted to be courted.
It's quite frustrating because once you experience this attraction its hard to feel the same intensity and same level of attraction in other connections or people after it. No one feels quite as right or attractive as that person. This is one where you will never forget each other.
You know no matter how much time has passed if you see each other again it will be as if no time has passed, that spark will never die and neither will the attraction. 
I will say there is other placements needed to turn the spark into a long lasting wildfire. This can be really difficult if you don’t have other placement to support it because it can create the dynamic of wanting to be with each other so strongly and keep trying and coming back but not being able to sustain it. 
Tumblr media
Thank you for reading, and let me know if you want more content like this <3
788 notes · View notes
ambrosiagoldfish · 2 months
Note
HI! Can I request Vox, husk or anyone else with a s/o who has an addiction problem?
Yes I know my Grammar and punctuation is out of line 🙏🏽
Hazbin Hotel x Addict!Reader
(Vox, Husk, and Angel Dust)
Viewer Discretion is Advised!
Warning: Drug/Alcohol Abuse, Gn!Reader, Reader being defensive, happy-ish endings.
Request Box: Open
Word count: 1170
A/n: Hi! Thank you for the request! This is my first time writing both Vox and Husk so I had to do some research (and by research, I mean reading 2+ hours of how other write them) to get an idea of their main characterization.
I really enjoyed writing this as I personally have my own experiences with addicts and how it’s affected me as a person. So this was also a little bit of a vent post if anything. I also added Angel cause I think it fits the theme but also he’s one of my comfort characters and writing for him made me happy.
Hope you enjoy <3
Proofread like once so sorry for any mistakes!
Tumblr media
Vox
He’s used to being friends/knowing addicts. I mean one of his closest allies (And TOTES not previous hook-up buddy) Valentino, is also an addict who also employs many as well. So he’s not a stranger to it.
So mostly he’s indifferent to it, almsot desensitized to it. He doesn’t really see a danger to it, I mean we’re in hell and you can’t exactly OD and die
But of course, death isn’t the only thing that can happen when you're an addict. The breakdown of you as a person often happens, as well as you being reckless with money. And this is where Vox starts to have a problem.
If you’re in a relationship with Vox, then clearly you mean a lot to him, he may not be the most expressive about it but he does. So to see the partner that he has opened up to and grown attached to deteriorate slowly in front of him is something he refuses to accept.
So one day he cancels a meeting with his staff and calls you to his office so you two will be alone. When you get there he gives you a cup of coffee and you catch up a bit. How was your day? Have you ate yet? Those kinds of things.
Until finally he decides to just break open the floodgates with one simple statement.
“Darling… I think you should get clean”
You were caught off guard at first
“It’s fine, What’s the problem? we’re in hell”
He then comes out with his honest opinion
“*Sigh* I know it’s hell and you can’t die… but surely you can see how it would make me a bit… worried for you.”
He paused
“I mean even last week you spent all the allowance I gave you on it and you would have starved if I didn’t buy you food, surely you can see why it’s a fucking problem!”
Eventually after talking and depending on how it goes you either agree to go clean or it ends with an argument and he’ll just try again later.
If you agree, he’ll make sure he’s with you ever step of your sobriety. Considering he’s one of the top rising Overlords and owns VoxTech he’s got money so He’ll higher the best people to help you go clean(Do therapist exist in hell?)
“Thank you dear, you have no idea how much this means to me”
Tumblr media
Husk
Similar to Vox in a lot of ways but also really different. He himself is an addict with alcohol so he clearly understands the struggles of it.
He has lots of walls up but for someone who “lost the ability to love” he sure does care a lot for you. I don’t think he would try a get you to go clean, at least not right away (or even at the beginning of the relationship) simply cause he thinks he doesn’t have a right to judge. So in all honesty he might just let you be.
That is until he realizes that you do it to forget things and ignore your problems/past. He knew first hand that drowning your sorrows away with your choice of addictive vice did nothing but harm you.
Then when you two are alone at his bar he’ll talk to you about it in a similar way he did with Angel. Perhaps a bit more softer than he did with Angel but even then “softer” is a bit of an overstatement.
“Look, I know you got a lot of shit that you don’t want to think about… but doing this *sigh* it’s not going to work, at least not in the long term.”
“That’s rich coming from you.”
He laughs. I mean, you were right. He was single handedly the worst person to be judging you. But surely you can understand his point of view, right?
Either way though, he leaves it alone again. Occasionally bringing it up when you’re both alone. He expresses the same sentiment about it each time hoping that eventually, hopefully…you’ll come to see from his perspective.
When you do finally see that he’s worried for you and understand why, you agree to go clean. Which, for once in a long while, made his supposedly cold dead heart melt.
“Glad you finally came to your senses… Seriously, I’m glad…”
Tumblr media
Angel
He is THE addict of the show, so obviously he knows what you are going through and THEN some. Now,. Here’s the thing, how he handles it depends HEAVILY on when exactly you got with him/when you started having you addiction problem.
If you started dating him when you already were an addict he most definitely wouldn’t question anything about it. Hell, chances are you both might have taken part in it together. And it’s only when he starts making progress in the hotel (post EP4) is when he starts realizing how bad of an influence you both were on each other.
If you started sometime AFTER you both started dating then this boy would honestly feel terrible about it, ESPECIALLY after EP4 when he actually started being sober more often. He’d feel like he was a bad influence on you and that it was his fault you turned to your addiction.
Either way though, he will eventually realize that he doesn’t want you to be/continue to be on the same path he was. He’d talk to Charlie about arranging you to stay in the hotel, either in your own room or you guys could share one (he would honestly prefer the latter) and then after the preparations are made he would finally ask you too
Angel wasn’t expecting it to be easy, he gets what it’s like to suddenly be asked to go clean. And he knows how addicts act when they don’t get there vices, how he acts. So he mentally prepared himself for the worst first before asking you to come over and talk.
“Uh… Y/n can I talk to you about somethin’?”
You nod your head
“I’ve been thinking and… I think you should crash here at the hotel with me… and’ go clean.”
You only laugh “Angie I’m glad this hotel thing is workin’ for ya but that’s not really my style. No- I mean, I’m fine!”
Angel knows he put you on the spot, so he lightens off a bit but continues pressing on. He explains how he feels and how he doesn’t want anything bad to happen to you, to end up where he is. The poor boy starts crying honestly with how much he’s worried. He rarely opens up to people so this was a big step for him.
Seeing how much he cared and worried about you really put into perspective how important this was to him. So you agreed after some thinking.
“*sniff* thank you Baby, I’ll be there with you every step of the way… I love ya’ you know.”
413 notes · View notes
khuzena · 2 months
Text
Just a coworker
Dr ratio x g/n!reader (i tried)
Part 1, Part 2
cw. angst, super slow burn, they eventually get tgt, hurf/comfort, jealousy brr, reader is unhinged, mentions of drugs, kinda cringe but who cares I've written worse, not proofread, dr ratio is a pussy
a/n: I HATE LIFE SJNAANAN
Tumblr media
A week passed and you got the jist of it, you were already done with the basics but everytime that man always found a reason to keep tutoring you.
You were grading some papers until you felt someone looming over you and snooping around your laptop.
“Hey!”
“Do you really need to shout?”
You hid your laptop away from him as he pried for any more info, causing you to kick his leg.
“Who’re you talking to?”
“Why the hell would you care? Plus im grading some papers, you asshole”
You typed away as he didn't leave your side, just watching you input some values— damn one of your students got a 2/100? Might as well make them repeat a grade.
“Which idiot fails literature? More or less just essay writing?”
“Uh…”, you paused, your other hand getting your coffee and sipping on it, “An illiterate person?”
No other words were shared as you two just sat in silence, him staring at the grading sheet and you typing away on your keyboard.
It was a quiet day, peaceful even. If it weren't for a fight that broke out at the food court. You should mind your business, but your favourite student had been gravely injured; worry comes easy.
You ran to the student, one hand rested on his leg as it bled, “Hey, stay with me— breathe.”
Your student, Mike, had been buying some coke from some guy in your coworker’s class, turns out Mike got scammed and well, you did not know the full story to take any full action but the blood shed was enough to panic.
“Mike, Mike!”
You held him, you were not an expert at cpr or had any training on how to deal with that much bleeding or anything about dealing with concussions.
Shit, shit.
“We need a doctor!”
Despite your desperate yelling, none were brave to come forth to help, the others just recording or covering their eyes.
What were you supposed to do?
You held onto mike as the others tried to restrain the guy that hurt him, this was bad.
Until you saw Veritas buying some coffee at the new coffee shop from weeks ago.
“Hey you!”
Veritas does not flinch, he does not respond.
“DOCTOR VERITAS RA—”
He groaned, about to run away yet you yelling his full name was enough to make him regret not buying earplugs prior to this incident.
He walked up to you and your student as he kneeled at the both of you’s level.
“What exactly happened?”
No matter how much he hates you and your guts, he still has a duty as a doctor.
��Some asshole beat him up, fuckin’ hell”
He doesn't say anything, before laying Mike down in a more comfortable position and getting a pill from his pocket.
“What's that?”
“Tylenol”
He forced open Mike's mouth and shoving down a pill.
“Isn't that a tad bit aggressive?” Mike was near choking as you patted his back and elevated his seating position.
“So it's better to airplane the pill in his mouth like he's 2 and let him die then?”
“That's not what I meant.” you sneered before some guys from the medical department ran to your side and took care of it.
Now you two were just standing behind the infirmary door and waiting for any update.
“I'm going to miss my class because of you.”
You laughed, the audacity of this man?
“Then go, I didn't ask you to stay.”
It's so hard to read this man when he has his alabaster head on, you can't even tell what he's thinking.
“You talk too much”
“You started it!”
“Just stop talking”
“Whatever.”
You peaked through the window and saw Mike unconscious on his bed, even though it wasn't your fault, it feels like it is…
You sighed as the nurse left the room, standing still before she spoke, “He's fine. It's good that you and Dr. Ratio was there.”
“Uhh yeah…”
You really didn't do much…
Veritas stayed silent as the nurse left, he's not one to like small talk.
“huff… huff… finally.”
You raised an eyebrow, before registering whose voice it was, your eyes lighting up.
“Amir!”
“Whew… I had to end class early, I learned about what happened too late.”
“It's not your fault”
Amir sighed while leaning so ungodly close to you, before Veritas had some audacity left in him to make a comment, “Actually, it is.”, he really has no shame does he?
“I apologise.”
“Now you're just being rude.”
Veritas turned away, can't that man just leave you both alone?
“I don't care. It was both your student's that got into this mess.”
“I have over a hundred students, how could I monitor all of them?”
“Yet you still have to take responsibility for it. I can't believe you let it get to that level.”
“Then leave, if you're just gonna be rude then shut up.”
Amir's jaw hung when he heard you literally tell the Dr. Ratio himself to shut it, not even the people from the IPC would have this level of audacity. It was your last straw, you've already dealt with enough bullshit for the day.
Usually, he would have some snarky reply up in his sleeves but what's crazy is that he just walked away.
“Did you just—”
“I did.”
“Wow.”
You were already about to go home as it was getting late, who knew having to shoulder the aftermath of that fight would be that tiring? No shit sherlock.
Peace and quiet, no one to bother you—
“You there.” that familiar voice echoing in the hallways as loud stomps were nearing your direction.
You spoke too soon. Why him of all people?
“You didn't come to today's tutoring session.”
You crossed your arms, looking up at him. Wow. He wasn't wearing his alabaster head? Can't say that it's new but the opportunity to stare at his face was a rare occurrence. But, he infuriates you too much that you'd rather kiss mud than oogle at him.
“And?”
“What do you mean ‘and’? I was waiting for you.”
You eyed him up and down, he did look upset. But did he really think you'd have the energy to confront him, much less see him after what happened today?
“I told you I wouldn't be able to attend tutoring lessons as I have someone to tutor too”
“When did you say that?”
“Two days ago?”
He was baffled, utterly baffled. When did you say that? You must be lying. Despite his stone head obstructing you from any chance to see him right now, by his voice, he was fuming.
He crossed his arms, his right foot tapping aggressively, “I do not recall you saying that.”
“But I did.”, his eyebrows furrowed as you spoke with clear conviction, what do you mean you did?
“You should've told me.”
“I did.”
“Then— why are you being so difficult?”
“It's not me who's being difficult, why are you even mad?”
Like that, the words at the tip of his tongue vanished. Exactly, why was he so worked up?
“You're just using this as an excuse to not deal with the issue.”
You had enough of his bullshit. You started to walk the other way but he just couldn't leave you alone.
“And what if I am? Get lost.”
“We need to talk.”
You turned your heel and faced him, face red and hot then you pointed at him,
“About what? About how sure it's absolutely my fault about what happened today, I'm an idiot, I don't know anything!”
“Now you're just blowing the issue up into something completely different.”
“What else is there to say?”
“You—”
He got silent, biting his lip under that stone head as his temper got the best of him.
“You really are an idiot.”
“Just leave me alone.”
There were no other words exchanged as you walked away, your footsteps getting more faint as a second, another one and another pass.
He shook his head at your outburst, you really were an idiot, incompetent and… whatever. At least now that blabbermouth always peering over his shoulder is gone.
As you walked home, you couldn't help but cry. There was nothing to cry over but it was too much. The heads berating you for not paying attention to your students, that a scandal like that could ruin the university— to hell with that shit, to hell with that university.
At least you felt safe, at home, with the company of your cats.
“Meow?”
Ah.
You hugged your cat, its fur getting wet as tears dripped, you were starting to taste the saline tears as it creeped into the corners of your lips.
Your phone rang with notifications from the doctor, Wait— how'd he even get your number? shit. But god won't he just leave you alone?
With a click, the notifications died down leaving only your quiet sniffles and your cat’s purr to be heard in the living room.
You didn't have any energy to eat, to hell with your health.
You turned off the lights and plopped into your bed, your cat joining you (yay) as the soft glow of the lamp illuminated the room.
You let out a yawn, turning the lights off but there was a call notification.
‘From Unknown Number’
You felt the urge to swipe and listen to what he had to say, but it's probably bullshit.
You fell asleep.
[From Unknown Number.]
:hey.
:answer me.
:stop being so difficult and just give me 3 minutes.
:Are you there?
:idiot.
:hey.
[99 more unread messages]
Time flies, three days flew by already yet it still feels like yesterday. You feel like shit, yeah the issue has been resolved, everything's fine but why did something just feel so wrong?
It was a good rest though, bless that lady who allowed you to have a few days off.
[From Unknown Number]
:I know you're seeing this.
:Stop acting like a child.
:Come on.
:You moron.
[231 more unread messages]
Phew, when you entered the faculty room, there was no Veritas in sight. Good, good.
You laid down your satchel on your desk and readied some stuff before heading out, making sure to check all hallways before you make a move; don't want to see the Doctor so early in the morning. (checking every hallway 24/7? What is this? Fnaf?!?)
Things were uncannily peaceful today, did he not come to work today? Or… Maybe you just got really lucky that you both did not cross paths for today.
“And,” you wrote diligently on the whiteboard, “That ends our discussion for today.”
The time ticked to 4:58 pm, you could already see some of your students pack their things.
“Any questions?”
They all shook their heads no as you finally dismissed them, oh how you missed being in your classroom despite being away for merely 3 days.
Today's a lucky day, no issues, no Veritas Ratio in sight.
“Hey __”
You jolted at the sudden call of your name, your head turning from the sound as you see Amir with a worried expression.
“Oh, Amir?”
So suddenly, he pulled you into a hug.
“What're you doin—”
“I was worried.”
“About?”
“You were no contact with everyone for three days, we were all worried.”
You awkwardly laughed, Amir was a fine man, definitely not your type though. You squirmed away from his hold.
“Yeah, just needed a break”
“Oh, I see.”
He paused, “You good now?”, his tone laced with concern.
“Yeah, at least I think so.”
“That's good.”
Your best friend, he was not stupid. He was intuitive too, he eyed you like you were some sort of experiment and like with any experiment, he's made his hypothesis.
“You don't sound ‘good’”
“What do you mean?”
“Is this about Dr. Ratio?”
Bingo, right on the money. There was no use trying to lie to him, especially not after chuckling awkwardly when you got caught.
You nodded, confirming his guess, “Knew it.”
He was in deep thought as he tried to think of any and every possibility why.
“Are you guys dating or something?”
You choked on your own spit— him of all people? Is he out of his mind? At this point, the idea of getting with that socially inept man sounds like an insult.
“Are you trying to piss me off?”
“Calm down sponge bob squarepants, geez”
You groaned as he handed you a juice box. “Thanks,” you quietly muttered out.
It was 5 pm, by now, everyone's probably clocked out by now.
It's weird, a 5 pm where you don't get tutor lessons from him.
Whatever, food for thought.
As you left the faculty room, a small part in you wanted to catch a glimpse of him despite you trying to avoid him. Did you miss him? or was just not being alone at these hours too comforting?
He wasn't there. As expected.
The next day, you see Veritas, you two walk past each other, he did not spare you a glance.
“Doctor…”
Wind breezes through the both of you but you stood still as he kept walking to his class. How cold.
It was no use trying to confront him, atleast, not here.
For a second, your gaze softened but you quickly got back to your senses. This feeling was strange.
The bell rang and, as usual, everyone left. What a fulfilling job.
This week has been really quiet. Peaceful but something was missing. Your life was fun, not this mundane even before Veritas but a part of you looks for him. No no, you were just being insane or something.
The faculty room door slid open, then, just as you wished would never happen (oh really?) Veritas was at you guys’ usual tutoring spot.
You wanted to run but your bag was there. Mustering up the courage, you tiptoed and grabbed your satchel, it felt like playing a horror game with how stealthy you were trying to be.
Shit.
Your pen fell, hopefully it didn't catch his attention.
Just as you were about to go grab it, he took it and handed it to you.
You gulped and took the pen, wanting to run but you froze on the spot.
“You look stupid trying to act stealthy.”
You didn't reply, only gulping nervously as you stayed still.
“What? Say something.”
Truth is, you had nothing to say.
“Sigh, you really like making things so difficult, don't you?”
He doesn't stop you from leaving, but maybe it was you stopping yourself from leaving.
An awkward silence ensued, it was getting annoying, for him, atleast.
“Aren't you going to leave?”
You don't say anything, just standing still, again.
“Answer me.”
Why did you enter the room?
“...” Veritas walked up to you, his codex not in hand as leaned closer.
“Give me 3 minutes.”
He raised your chin with a finger, face unreadable despite his alabaster head gone. It's the third or fourth? You've lost count how many times you saw his real face. Your memory was shit.
“I just want to talk about how…”
He bit his lip, yet his eyes remained fixed on your blank expression.
“That I want to apologise for my behaviour last week.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
That same old silence, he couldn't find the right words, he doesn't know how to say sorry.
“Well…”
“Well?”
Did he stutter? That's odd; very.
“I…” His eyes leave yours, he's practised saying it but it's the hardest thing he'll ever have to do, “I'm…”
Curious eyes gaze into his conflicted ones. Can he even say it?
“So…” sorry.
“I'm sorry.”
You stare at him with shock, did he just apologise?
“Did I hear that right?”
“God damn it.”
He pulled away and walked away to his desk but you followed him, “Hey, did you mean it?”
“Why wouldn't I?”
He knew you'd react like this, he expected you to laugh, mock him or anything but you just look at him with a look of shock—
“I see.”
—And somewhat relieved of what he said.
“I'm sorry too.” He was envious of how easily you spoke those words, you were no genius, yet you were better than him at apologising.
“I shouldn't uh—”
“I just want to say that—”
You cleared your throat, licking your lips in anxiety, “You go first”
“No you—”
“No, you.”
He hung his head low, before looking in your direction.
“It was uncalled for me to treat you and that man that way.”
“I'm listening.”
“I didn't take into account that you both were probably stressed from the situation and…”
He couldn't find the words, nothing was new to him. Complex maths? Easy. Medicine? Easy. Philosophy? Done. History? Is this a joke? He knows everything!
Other than one thing.
“I'm sorry.”
Apologising.
His words brought you immense relief, it was your turn to speak. For the first time, you can read his face. He looked pitiful. Did he not get enough sleep lately?
“I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have lashed out on you.”
How could you just have the knack to be so… Human? That, he couldn't understand. Being genuine, felt new.
“I understand.”
“What now?”
He fixed his books on the shelf, the ones he wanted to share with you.
“I dont know.”
“I thought you knew everything?”
He rolled his eyes as you teased him for it, he shouldn't have apologised.
“Stop talking, and also.”
He handed you some wipes, what was it for?
“Your hand,” you looked down at your dominant hand, seeing whiteboard marker creases, “Clean it up.”
“Oh okay.”
You wiped the stains off, but you wondered how perceptive he was. You didn't even notice it yourself.
“How's the tutor lesson with your student?”
Ah, that guy. It's been long since you've finished tutoring him with the basics.
“Went smoothly, he passed his exam”
He hummed, he finished tidying up his desk, good that you listened to his lectures.
“What did you teach him?”
“Until just page 25”
“Huh?”
But you studied the entire book with him, if you just needed help with just page 25, the tutor session would've only taken a week.
“Did you just keep going to the tutor sessions to see me?”
“Maybe, maybe not”
A soft smile creeped up in your face as you saw him short circuit for a bit before regaining his senses.
“You jest”
“I do not.”
“So… When's the next session?”
“At my place, tonight. It's getting late.”
Oh? At his place? What a bold offer—
“Just reviewing?”
“Just reviewing.”
You laughed as he rolled his eyes, the two of you leaving the faculty room.
“Under one condition.”
You raised an eyebrow, what was he asking for now?
“A date.”
“Pardon?”
“Do I have to repeat myself?”
You choked on your spit, that's absurd— god.
“No, I heard you. Fine.”
“Agreeing that easily?”
“Do you want me to refuse?” He was starting to get cocky, might as well drag him back down to earth.
“No, you still need to learn more about Quantum Mechanics.”
“Fine.”
Veritas pulled you close to him as you both walked the sidewalk, isn't he such a gentleman?
“The tab's on you?” no way were you paying the tab, he better pay it.
He scoffed, he could feel you hold onto his arm as he made sure you were on the right side of the lane to protect you of some sort.
“Whatever, you moron. Hurry up, we still have so much to review.”
Tumblr media
A/N: its so bad wtf😭😭😭😢
222 notes · View notes
victoirey · 1 year
Note
hi! i’ve never done a request before but i read ur neteyam x reader and knew you’d do my thoughts justice 😭 okay, neteyam x omatikaya!f reader who comes along with the sully family to the metkayina clan. neteyam and reader are childhood best friends and they do nearly everything together, and during the battle when neteyam is recusing lo’ak and spider the reader pushes neteyam out of the way and gets shot protecting him. the reader can survive or not, it’s up to you. make it angsty pls! thank you so much in advance!
♡. "it was always him, in the end." —
Tumblr media
synopsis / your love for neteyam knows no bounds.
gn!omaticayan!reader | angst. reader being down bad for neteyam because this is you guys we're talking about. i hate this, anon im sorry this sucks ASS
Tumblr media
it was always him, in the end.
you would always love neteyam, as young as you are right now, you know your feelings wouldn't change. it was always ever him. you would always go back to him. every breath you took and step you take, it was all because of him. neteyam. neteyam, neteyam, neteyam, neteyam. he didn't know it yet, but there was someone out there who loved him more than they could ever love themselves. he just didn't know how close this person was to him.
you'd had always been by neteyam's side for as long as you could remember. you flied with him, fought with him, ran with him, ate with him— everything with him. you were inseparable. if someone asked neteyam who his ride or die was, he'd answer with "y/n." and his tone would be sure & certain. you'd smile at that thought. you'd smile at him in general.
you left behind your roots to go with him and his family— who at this point, saw you as one of their own. you left behind everything you knew in the forest, and you left behind who you were — because from then on, you would adapt to the metkayinan ways. you would adapt with him. everything was better if it was with him, you thought. everything was better.
Tumblr media
sat on a marui pod, feet in the water, swishing and swoshing — unbothered by the way changed around you— because the only thing you could be bothered with was his ceaseless bickering. you whacked him, albeit playfully — as he mentioned something about you and aonung getting along too well. "aonung and i are nothing but acquaintances, neteyam— you know that, i know that, and you know what? i am pretty sure that aonung doesn't see me as anything more than a clueless nuisance!" you exclaimed, obviously tired of how the na'vi was treating you. neteyam only laughed, placing a hand on your hand nonchalantly.
your whole world blossomed.
you looked up at him, caught off guard by the sudden affection— eyes creasing as you smiled.
"you know," neteyam started, "the crap we're going through? it's tolerable. 'cause of you. you make it fun enough." he admitted, quietly.
it was as if he set you free. it was so random, but it was like ridding you of all your anxieties and that's why you loved him— that's when you knew. you were always inlove with him. you just didn't know you were because you were too busy being focused on him & loving him & cherishing him and—
being his, before he even knew it.
it was always him, in the end.
Tumblr media
it was always him, in the end.
he was where all your thoughts stemmed from, where they returned to in times of anxiety. it was neteyam's voice you'd imagine lulling you to sleep, loving mutters of his imagined love for you. it was always him you'd return to, after a battle gone awry— because you wanted to make sure he was alive.
it was always him you'd return to.
so it was no surprise when you returned to him in the midst of battle, watching him fight alone as he distracted them from his siblings. the only thing that crossed your mind in those few seconds were—
help him.
help him, help him, help him.
and so you did.
you came to his aid, kicking one of the skydemons over— and you took a hit for him. you flinched at the sting, but you didn't waver anymore. you could only look at him. neteyam.
neteyam, neteyam, neteyam.
when you met him, both of you at the ripe age of five, all you ever really wanted to do was talk to him. to impress him. to befriend him. now, at the end of your life, all of your thoughts go back to him.
will he be okay? what will become of him? will he remember me?
will he remember me?
it was always him, at the end.
Tumblr media
"y/n! Y/N!" he cried, shaking you — trying to get you to wake up, trying to get you to smile at him again— but to no avail. he laid your head on the rock ever so gently, hoping that you'd be touched at his gentleness like you always were— hoping you'd live, by some miracle done by Eywa. he cried, holding your hand to his face and kissing it tenderly.
"y/n—" he hiccuped, unable to finish his sentence. he hoped you'd be able to hear him, anyway. wherever you were. perhaps you were waiting for him, with Eywa? to cross. he hopes he won't leave you waiting for too long. it's as if your life flashes before his eyes, memories of you replaying in his head— and he realizes;
he's always been with you. everytime you weren't there, he'd listen to the seas and go— "they'd like this." everytime he passed by a plant, he'd think, "I'll give it to them, someday." everytime he ate tasty food, he'd go "they'd love this!" — and through all those moments, in some way, you were there with him. because he could never let you go.
"y/n, listen to me one last time, okay?" he starts, voice shaky as he leans in — whispering something only you can hear. a secret you'll keep.
"I love you."
he says what he needs to say, and leans away. he stays with you, your head in his lap— for the rest of the battle. he protects you like you're alive, because in some way, you are. in the trees, in the seas, in everywhere. neteyam sighs tiredly, having dealt with enough these past weeks, and now— dealing with your death. he mourns you in the silence he has been given, either from the fact his ears are ringing, or the battle has paused.
"it was always you, in the end, wasn't it?"
Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes
starlazergazer · 1 year
Text
Senators Shadow
Pairing: Anakin x Reader
Summary: Anakin is your regular Jedi guard whenever your job in the senate brings you to Coruscant which wouldn’t be a problem if he didn’t spend the entire time practically ignoring you making It clear he didn’t really want to be there. Until something changes on this trip and the two of you start to become close.
Warnings: Swearing, some jealous Anakin, scene where the readers being shot at from a crowd, that should be it
Word Count: 10K (may have gotten a bit carried away with this one but I hope its worth it!)
A/N: I’m a sucker for an enemies to lovers type thing plus a jealous Anakin moment so I wrote this to amuse myself (cause what’s the point of being a writer if you can’t write a fic for yourself once in a while?) Easily the longest one I’ve written so I hope you enjoy!!
Tumblr media
You never really liked having to be on Coruscant. Things moved too fast here, you were always rushing from one meeting to another, prepping for speeches, consulting others, it often felt like you never got a chance to breathe only making you long for the minute you could leave and go back home.
And the longer you had to stare into Anakin’s eyes, the more you felt that longing grow.
“I appreciate the concern Jedi Skywalker” you addressed the man before you formally, interlacing your fingers and setting them on your desk, pushing forth an air of professionalism and authority “but I do not need a jedi guard for the time that I’m here”
A hint of a smirk graced his lips at your words, however, nothing more than its ghost ever appeared, a twitch in the corners of his lips. Often you wondered if you simply read too much into his expressions. “and I’m afraid your excellency that both the senate and the jedi council disagree”
There was no denying that Anakin was incredibly good looking, even if you tried to ignore that as much as possible, this simple fact was enough to have the people within the capital constantly whispering about him. Beyond this, however, he also had the reputation of being devilishly charming. You never got the chance to know that side of Anakin.
Sometimes you see glimpses of that version of him, you certainly did when you first met him as he introduced himself with a boyish grin and a look that had your cheeks stained scarlet, but since that first encounter it has been nothing but this stoic, aloof jedi that was now before you. And some stupid part of you wondered if it had been something you said that first night that pushed him away.
“Alright this is, however, my person we are talking about” you argued back, fighting down your own annoyance at his persistence “I get final say in what happens to it and that includes whether or not I have someone guarding it”
His answer was quick and to the point, as it always was “that is not how this works”
And oh how you loathed his complete lack of emotion, here you were out on a limb trying to reason with him, trying to compromise, trying to get something, anything out of him and still he responded as if you were little more than a talking brick wall.
“Then tell me Jedi Skywalker” You tried to take a deep breath, tried to calm yourself down, unable to keep the bite completely out of your words “how does this work?”
He leaned back in his chair causally, crossing his ankle over his knee, exuding confidence as he stated simply “either you let me act as your guard or you don’t make the speech next week”
You raised an eyebrow back at him, your voice dropping to a dangerous level “excuse me?”
“the jedi council has it on good authority there is going to be an attempt on your life so the senate is not going to let you on the floor unless they have reason to believe you aren’t going to die upon it” he explained indifferently, as if you were the one being ridiculous here.
“Wouldn’t resources be better spent actually looking for the person threatening my life then?” you pointed out with a sigh, posture slumping over slightly as you spoke, resigning yourself to the shadow being forced upon you for the next week.
“Oh we do have people on that” he assured you “just not me”
“No you’re on guard duty” you rolled your eyes at him.
“I’m on guard duty” he echoed back and you tried to ignore how hollow the words came from him, it would seem he was as happy about this assignment as you were.
And you wished you had a biting remark back for that, not fully ready admit just why his words bothered you so much, but you didn’t, instead you were left staring at Anakin in the chair before you, him doing the same as a brief silence fell over the two of you before a knock at the door broke it, one of your aide’s, head popping through the doorway.
“I have Jace here to see you senator”
You felt the smile grown naturally on your face at the news, unaware that your best friend and quite possibly the only person who could make this week better was even on Coruscant.
“Thank you please send him in” you nodded at her, eyes flicking back down to Anakin’s form, smile slowly dropping from your face as your gaze met his small glare “are we done here jedi?”
“It would appear so” he nodded stiffly, pushing himself up to a standing position, his mouth open, ready to say something when a new voice cut him off.
“Y/N Y/L/N it has been far too long”
A giggle escaped past your lips as Jace slipped into the room with wide arms, you not hesitating to meet him halfway across the room, more than happy to be caught up in his bone crushing hug as a greeting.
“Jace how could you not tell me you were going to be here” you chastised him with a small hit of his arm once he set you down, the grin never once leaving your face, you weren’t sure you could admit to even him how badly you needed someone on your side this week.
“Thought I’d surprise you” he shrugged with a wink and you were so excited to see him you almost missed the other voice as it spoke up from across the room.
“Senator”
Your head whipped around to meet Anakin’s gaze, a raised brow silently asking your question for you.
“I’ll be outside the room”
You didn’t have time to give any response before he was ducking out the door, finally leaving you and Jace alone.
“You have a babysitter” Jace mused with a smirk on his lips as he made his way to the bar cart in the corner, making the two of you a drink without being asked as you slumped down into one of the chairs before your desk.
“I have a babysitter” you groaned. The words, now that they were in the open, cementing themselves in reality “and it just had to be Anakin fucking Skywalker”
Jace snorted as he brought the drinks over, wordlessly handing you one as he sat in the chair next to you “of course it’s Anakin Skywalker, it’s always Anakin”
You furrowed your brow at him, taking a sip of your drink “it is not always Anakin, last time I had Master Obi-wan”
“Because Anakin was on a mission in Crait for nearly a month at that time” Jace pointed out with a smirk making you frown.
“I’m sorry you just know Anakin’s schedule at all times?”
“I knew about it last time because like I said you always get Anakin as security” he chuckled shaking his head at you as if it were obvious.
“I do not” you insisted still, mind racing as you thought back to the last time you had been assigned a jedi that wasn’t Anakin “Just last year I had Master Kuno”
“mmmm when you made that speech denouncing the banking clan” Jace hummed softly as he thought “I believe Anakin was on medical leave then”
You shook your head at your friend, sipping your drink “you do acknowledge that it’s weird that you know that right? It’s important to me that you know that”
Jace chuckled at that shaking his head softly at you “and it’s weird that you’ve never noticed that Anakin, if he is available, is always your guard”
“Alright so the jedi order decided to assign their young padawan to guard the young senator” you thought as you talked, more or less making up your own rationalizations on the spot “pair the two people who are up and coming in their respective careers”
Jace didn’t even bother to refute that, sending you no more than an unimpressed expression with a raised brow. You realized with a sigh you already knew exactly where he was going with this as he opened his mouth to speak.
“no” you held up your finger, interrupting him “don’t even try”
“Y/N it’s obvious” he sighed nearly making you choke on your drink.
“Obvious? Really Jace, obvious?” you nearly laughed “I can’t even get the guy to talk to me for longer than like two minutes”
Jace just shrugged at that, as if it made no difference “He’s a jedi, they’re weird maybe he’s nervous or something”
At that you did laugh, not liking how bitter it sounded out in the open “you’ve seen how he talks to every other woman in the capitol he’s definitely not nervous”
At that Jace froze, a single eyebrow raising as he nearly gaped at you “I haven’t, but I’m very interested to learn that you’ve noticed this”
You groaned inwardly, feeling your cheeks heat up on the spot “that is not the point I’m trying to make”
“It’s the point now” Jace cut you off with a wicked grin “Y/N Y/L/N is there something you want to get off your chest”
“I will have him come in here and throw you out” you threatened, unable to keep the small smile off your face as you did so.
“Hey if you wanted time alone with him all you had to do was say so” Jace held his hands up defensively, smirking down at you.
You nearly threw your drink at him.
-
You would think after all of these trips to Coruscant you would learn to pack properly. That, however, would make things just too easy.
You were prepared for meeting rooms, for the senate floor, for your bedroom. You had professional clothing, comfy clothing, pajamas, you were prepared for anything within the capital building that could take place.
What you were not prepared for was a walk to Dex’s diner.
You were supposed to meet a senator at the diner, the man absolutely insisting on dinner while you were meeting, and you could never really say no to eating at Dex’s.
But you could see Anakin’s look of confusion at your outfit choice as you immerged from your room, the man giving you a simple raised brow but still you refused to give into the embarrassment of admitting to your mistake.
“Is that what you’re wearing?” there was no malice in his question but still you felt your cheeks burning at its asking, looking back down over yourself, pretending to not notice that the clothing was much too light for the cold weather outside.
“Yeah why? Is there something wrong with it?”
“Uh no you look” and Anakin paused here, his eyes scanning your form briefly in a way that had you squirming slightly on the spot, his eyes finally making their way back up to your own, Anakin’s voice much softer than before “you look good Y/N”
And if you had thought you had blushed hard before.... Your gaze was quickly thrown to your shoes, a desperate attempt to hide the blush as you mumbled out a thanks before clearing your throat awkwardly, nodding slightly to the door, Anakin nodding back and stepping aside, letting you exit first.
Keeping your head held high you whisked past him, only regretting your situation as soon as the crisp air hit your mostly bare arms.
Warm clothing, how could you forget any and all forms of warm clothing.
You tried to hide your slight shiver, wrapping your arms around yourself to conserve body heat, rubbing a hand up and down your bicep.
“Where’s your coat?” the voice beside you startled you, all too used to walking in complete silence with Anakin, to nearly tuning the man out completely.
“I forgot to pack it” you shrugged, almost wishing you had something more to say, something to keep the conversation going.
Instead the familiar silence fell back over the two of you as you walked, your mind already starting to tune the jedi out once again when you felt something being draped over your shoulders.
In surprise you froze, Anakin following suit as he came to a stop in front of you, hands still on the ends of his robe that now hung around your shoulders, holding it carefully around you. Slipping your arms into the sleeves you held them up to your eyes taking a moment to admire the simple brown robe, how surprisingly soft it was, the way it smelled like Anakin.
“Am I even allowed to wear this?”
“It’s just a robe” Anakin shrugged, already trying to push past the gesture “besides breaking a rule like that is worth you not freezing”
“but it’s a special jedi robe” you protested “am I going to get special jedi powers now?”
And god help you you saw the corners of his mouth twitch up at that, a laugh that came out as more of a cough following shortly that had your heart skipping a beat in your chest “that’s not how that works. Now come on” he tried to usher you forward but you stopped him.
“Hold on what about you” you asked “aren’t you cold”
And you weren’t sure if Anakin noticed the small smile that grew on his lips, didn’t notice or didn’t care, either way you were glad to finally see it “no I’m okay, let’s just-“ and he paused out of nowhere, smile slowly dropping from his lips as he looked up into the sky.
Furrowing your brows you started to do the same, pausing only as Anakin started to approach you, hands coming just beside your ears as he reached behind you, your breath catching in your throat at his closeness. Slowly, grabbing the hood on the cloak he pulled it forward, shrouding your head in it just as you started to notice the fat water droplets that began to stain the ground beneath your feet.
“keep your hair dry” he all but whispered, taking just a second longer before retracting his hands and taking a step back, turning on his heel and ushering you forward with a nod in that direction “come on let’s hurry”
And then he took off as if nothing had happened, as if that wasn’t the most emotion you had gotten out of him since you had met, as if he hadn’t just spent the last several seconds standing closer to you than was strictly necessary, as if your heart wasn’t hammering in your chest so hard you could feel it.
-
Too much of your mental space the rest of the day was spent trying to come up with ways to get Anakin to interact with you again. Like an itch you couldn’t quite scratch you felt this desire to talk to him again, to see that hint of a smile grace his lips, to see that small twinkle in his eye as he huffed and shook his head in amusement down at you. Something, anything that could clue you into what was going on inside of that jedi brain of his.
Beyond proposing a trip to the library, however, you had nothing.
A small nod was all you got for your efforts before he fell into place behind you, always a few feet back, hands held behind his back, head held high, not a single word uttered in your direction, a true return to form even after what had occurred earlier.
And a part of you scolded yourself for thinking it would ever be different, that you had let Jace’s words weasel their way under your skin like that, that you ever thought you’d be anything other than a job to him.
So wordlessly you led on, entering the library with him in tow, doing as you always did and completely ignoring your shadow’s existence for the time being, trying to turn your mind to the task at hand.
But why had that never been as hard before as it was now?
Taking a brief trip around the shelves, Anakin in tow close behind, it was a bit before you could find the exact copy you needed, of course on the top shelf well outside of your reach.
You took a tentative look back at Anakin to see his eyes wondering aimlessly around the library not even paying attention. And for a brief moment you debated asking him for help, he’d given his cloak so freely the other day, had yet to even ask for it back, you’d taken to the habit of wearing it around your rooms when cold. It had been a crack in the walls he erected between the two of you so long ago.
But it was just that, a crack. You’ve spent years at this point with whatever small amount of time spent in Anakin’s company more or less ignoring him, used to his curt nods and short answers, it wasn’t quite so simple to get over that.
With a small sigh you walked over to a nearby table and grabbed a chair, pushing it back in front of the shelf, giving it a small test with your hands before stepping one foot up.
Anakin was by your side in an instant, hands out before him, coming up to grab you but remaining just a bit too far away “What are you doing?”
“I need a book on the top shelf” you shrugged, pushing your weight onto the foot on the seat of the chair, Anakin shifting closer as you did so.
“Alright then I’ll get it” he urged, “this thing spins would you just get down”
“I’m already up here I’ll get it” you brushed him off, one hand on the back of the chair to steady yourself as you brought your other foot up, trying to react quickly with every small movement in the base of the chair as it swiveled slightly.
“Senator-“ Anakin tried again, practically begging you to get down.
“I’m like two feet in the air I’ll be fine” your hand left the back of the chair and immediately the thing pivoted slightly beneath you, your legs reacting by crouching slightly so you could keep your balance.
“Y/N” and you felt him grab you by the forearm, a shock surging through your arm at his sudden touch, effectively freezing you in place, your eyes coming back to connect with his for the first time, noting the concern they carried. His other hand reached out, a book flying off the top shelf and coming right into his palm, Anakin not even breaking eye contact as he did it “Look I’ve got it would you please get down”
And for a second it was like you had forgotten how to breathe, you can’t even remember the last time he had looked into your eyes so intently let alone touch you, the simple act had left you absolutely breathless with gorgeous blue eyes bouncing back and forth between your own and for the first time you felt what it was like to truly be the sole object of Anakin’s attention. You could feel yourself practically shrink within it, your knees aching slightly though you were quick to blame that on your attempt to balance on the chair.
“Uh-yeah” you hadn’t realized how long you had remained still and silent beneath his gaze until you broke its spell, forcing your gaze from his down to your shoes, using his hand as an anchor as you carefully stepped down, not missing the sharp hiss of air that left Anakin the minute you had both feet on the ground.
“here” he sighed almost in relief, holding the book out to you, you carefully taking it from his hands as he moved quickly to push the chair back to the table you had stolen it from.
Looking down at the cover you couldn’t help but chuckle slightly, casting your eyes back up to Anakin only to see him already looking at you, a faint smile pulling up at his lips “what?”
“I actually need the one next to this one” you bit the inside of your cheek to contain your own smile as he sighed dramatically, looking back up at the self before easily picking the one you needed off of the top.
“Thank you” you traded books with him, just barely catching the slightly wider smile on his lips as he placed the first back on the shelf. And you decided that you liked that smile, liked being its cause.
Wordlessly he ushered you towards the exit with an extended arm, you nodding sheepishly at him before walking out the doors, Anakin’s footsteps as usual following close behind but this time, to your surprise, he sped up once you got to the hallway, falling into step beside you as opposed to behind.
“So what do you need the book for?” The question startled you, your head whipping around to him on instinct though you tried desperately to restrain your surprise, worried expressing too much of it would scare him off.
“Oh-he’s just one of my favorite writers” you tried to keep your tone as casual as possible, only making you worry it sounded forced, you didn’t like how easily you came to second guessing your every move in the jedi’s presence “I’m hoping I could use some of his style to influence my speech, make it sound a little better”
His brow furrowed at that, his gaze never leaving yours as he spoke “why? I like your style”
You nearly stopped walking, quick blinks coming as you tried to wrap your head around his words, the question slipping out of you before you could think better “you’ve seen me speak before?”
“When I’m free” he shrugged as if it were a given, as if there was nothing better for a jedi to do than listen to a junior senator give a speech.
And for the first time you started to wonder if Jace was right, if there was a reason Anakin always ended up as your guard, if there was more to this tough, distant demeanor than you had previously thought.
“Do you want a drink?” You regretted the offer as soon as it left your lips, easily catching the hesitation on Anakin’s face the minute you asked “I just mean I’m going to be up for a little longer and since you’re stuck keeping me company it’s the least I could do” and he seemed to relax slightly at that only making you tack on more “plus as a thank you for grabbing the book for me”
And there was that small smile again, his features lighting up ever so slightly as it graced his lips, your own mirroring it of their own volition.
“Yeah I’d like that”
-
“You did not!” You exclaimed with a loud laugh, hand coming out instinctively to slap his chest as he grinned back at you, smile hid behind his glass as he raised it up.
“I had no other choice” he defended weakly in a voice that told you he had many.
“That make for three ships you’ve crashed in this story alone” you shook your head with a chuckle “you know someone has to pay for those, namely the people of the republic”
“A small price to pay for peace” he shrugged with a lazy grin, taking a sip of his drink.
“Have you tried this thing, I think they call it landing?” You teased earning a chuckle from the jedi, the sound making your cheeks ache as you tried to contain your grin.
“I’m sorry senator how many ships have you ever flown and landed successfully?” he taunted with a raised brow.
And you could blame it on the alcohol, could blame it on the sleep deprivation, could blame it on the cozy atmosphere in the room. But really it was just Anakin that had you pulling out childhood stories, the way he put you at ease, the strange familiar air of a man who’s spent the last several years practically ignoring you. In all honesty this was the most you had ever gotten from the man in terms of real conversation and you weren’t ready to let that go just yet.
“My father actually taught me to fly as a kid” you offered with a soft smile, watching Anakin’s brows shoot up ever so slightly.
“Really?” he prompted simply, leaving the door open for you to continue if you so choose.
“Yeah” you chuckled softly, casting your eyes down to your drink “he loved the freedom it gave him, the idea that he could go anywhere he wanted at the drop of a hat, could live amongst the stars. I think he wanted to instill that same feeling in me”
“and did he?” he asked with a sentimental smile and briefly you felt like he wasn’t just looking at you but rather watching you as you told your story, something you took a strange comfort in.
“He did” you nodded “he died a few years ago and I associate flying with him so much I feel like I’m working to fall in love with it all over again, just this time alone”
And at your words you watched his smile slowly melt off his face, his eyes casting downward into his own drink, and you prepared yourself for the inevitable. The sympathy, the condolences, the pity, instead Anakin surprised you with a story of his own.
“As a kid I was a pod racer, thought I was significantly better than I actually was ya know” he chuckled softly, eyes glancing up at yours for a brief moment before casting back down “but I knew my mother never really approved, thought it was too dangerous, but she always was my biggest supporter despite everything. I had to leave her years ago for the order and sometimes I wonder if I’m reckless now in some ridiculous bid to be closer to her”
“that’s not ridiculous” you shook your head, Anakin’s eyes coming back up to meet yours “it was a comfort to have your mother care for you in that way, only makes sense that when you miss her you seek that sense of comfort all over again”
And he chuckled softly at that, smiling to himself “I suppose you’re right”
And this time you could definitely blame it on the alcohol, or maybe the slight pink hue you thought you could see in his cheeks, but suddenly you felt yourself forcing your next words to the surface, a desperate need taking over you to have them out in the open. “I know we never really do this but I really like talking to you Anakin”
And for some reason the name felt weird on your mouth this time, felt weird being addressed to him rather than said behind his back, yet still you rather liked it.
A small smile grew on his lips as he looked back at you, eyes bouncing back and forth between your own before he spoke “I like talking to you too Y/N”
And you certainly liked the way your name sounded when he said it like that to you, soft and sweet, less a call to attention and more an affirmation.
His eyes darted to the clock and he sighed softly, leaning forward to set his glass on the edge of your desk “Come on its way past your bedtime”
You chuckled softly at that, shaking your head even as you knew he was right “I’m a senator I don’t have a bedtime”
He laughed back at that, taking your glass from you and setting it onto your desk next to his “and senators need 8 hours of sleep just like the rest of us”
“You expect me to believe you get a full 8 hours of sleep a night” you asked with a raised brow, watching in amusement as he shook his head softly from above you.
“Alright like the rest of us except for jedi knights”
Despite that ridiculous answer you relented, hands coming to the armrests of your chair ready to push yourself up when a hand suddenly entered your field of vision, Anakin’s hand offered simply to you. With a slightly furrowed brow you looked up at him as you took it, standing up with his small aide, coming to a position that had the two of you standing nearly chest to chest and instinctively you felt a small panic rise.
Instead his other hand came to the small of your back as he ushered you forward softly, hand slipping easily from your own as you walked forward out of your office, focused entirely too much on the feeling of his touch as it slowly slipped from your back, on the way he fell into step behind you as usual though this time mere inches away instead of feet.
Too quickly you reached the door to your room, spinning around to face him “this is me” you regretted the statement as soon as it left your mouth, wincing slightly at the sound of your own words which just had him laughing softly.
“Need me to clear it?” he asked in a low tone, his voice barely above a whisper as he inched closer “see if there’s a monster hiding under your bed”
“I think I’ll be okay” you chuckled softly back, scolding yourself for the way your gaze slipped down to his lips, the way your fingers twitched, eager to reach out.
The moment of silence stretched and still you felt yourself drifting closer, felt the friendly atmosphere give way to one of thick tension as the two of you stared back at one another, daring the other to give in and make the first move.
Instead Anakin stepped back, the smile slowly slipping from his lips though never entirely leaving “goodnight Y/N”
And with a sigh you couldn’t entirely contain you nodded softly, leaning against your doorway as you watched him walk back down the hall to his own room, “goodnight Anakin”
-
You dragged yourself from sleep with shallow quick breaths, bolting upright in place, eyes desperately scanning the room for anything that looked familiar.
But of course this was Coruscant and nothing really was.
This wasn’t the first time your sleep has plagued by nightmares, nor the first time you’ve woken up unsure of where you were, of what was going on, of where the threat was coming from.
And logically you knew where you were, in your room, safe, with a jedi guard just next door. So you tried to force yourself to take deep breaths, a hand on your chest as if you could physically push the air into you. And for the most part you had succeeded, your breath slowly but surely returning to normal.
But it didn’t rid you of the initial panic, of the overwhelming sense of dread, of the crushing loneliness of going through this in a room that wasn’t your own.
And for the first time your mind jumped to Anakin, afterall he was just next door.
This past day had been the closest you had ever felt to the jedi, approaching something that resembled friendship as he made an effort for the first time to actually talk to you. And based on that you really didn’t think he would mind, even if it was just him sitting in silence next to you, it was nice just having something there.
But still waking him would be welcoming him to a part of you you weren’t sure you were ready to show him yet. It was a level of vulnerability you weren’t ready to show him yet. Not to mention the man was a jedi, faced death on a near daily basis, was always putting himself in dangers way, what right did you have to go to him with nightmares?
Making up your mind you slipped silently out of your room and made your way to the front door, heading as you usually did to Jace’s apartment.
-
You tried to slip out of the room quietly, more than enough experience at this under your belt to know that you could probably force your way through the front door with a sledge hammer and Jace wouldn’t wake up but still wanting to take precautions nonetheless.
Up on your toes you snuck through the door, pressing the button on the other side to close it, waiting till it fully shut to relax, spinning around to begin the trek back to your rooms, when movement out of the corner of your eye caught you off guard. With a small gasp you stepped back from the mysterious object, nearly stumbling over your own feet, when you realized you recognized the mystery man lurking outside of the door.
“Anakin” you breathed out in relief, hand instinctually coming to your chest in an attempt to slow your racing heart “you scared me”
At first he didn’t say anything, stayed leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest, his posture telling you that he couldn’t have been more at ease, but his expression... His jaw was set, clenched hard enough you could see the muscle tensing even from your position, his gaze hard and unflinching as it bore down into you, Anakin was pissed.
“Imagine how I felt when I woke to find your room empty” His tone was cold and biting, as if he were spitting the words at you rather than conversing.
“Alright maybe I should’ve left a note” you conceded “but I figured I’d be back in an hour or two tops, and it’s Jace’s place you’ve met him”
“A note” he scoffed back at you, pushing himself off the wall to come close to you, forcing you to crane your neck in order to make eye contact, refusing to give in and take a step back “What part of this do you not get?”
“What part of what?” you demanded, crossing your own arms over your chest “you found me quite easily what is the harm?”
“What is the-“ he chuckled bitterly as he echoed you under his breath, a hand coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose before he burst “you suck out on me!”
“for like an hour” you protested, rising your voice to match his, not caring at this point who heard you
“That doesn’t matter” he paused briefly between each word, putting emphasis on each as he glared at you “I was tasked with guarding you that means I go where you go, everywhere you go, that means you don’t sneak out on me especially not to just spend the night with some guy” he gestured almost in disgust back at Jace’s door “this isn’t some joke Y/N”
“And I’m not treating it like one” you countered, clenching your jaw as you fought back the urge to push him back “you’ve come with me to everything for the entire time you’ve been my guard, I haven’t left your side, I’m playing by your rules”
“this” he gestured vaguely in your direction, a bitter laugh in the back of his throat “this is not playing by my rules, this is disobeying my orders, and a fucking note is not the correct fix to this situation”
“So I should’ve what? Asked you to escort me to Jace’s room at three in the morning?”
You watched him clench his jaw at that, a harsh glare sent back at you as he silently loomed over you, neither of you saying anything for a few seconds, before a deep breath escaped him, his chest deflating slightly as he grabbed your elbow, pulling you down the hallway “let’s just go back Y/N”
But you weren’t giving up on this so easily, weren’t letting him get away with chastising you in the middle of the hallway like you were a child. You ripped your elbow from his grasp, slowing your pace “I can walk myself”
“Really you sure you won’t get lost?” he condescended with a raised brow, crossing his arms in front of his chest “won’t accidentally end up in some other guys room for ‘just an hour’, I think senator Passel’s in this hall I’m sure you’ve heard the rumors about him”
You reacted without thinking, your hand coming up and slapping him across the cheek before you could fully process your action, though even after you couldn’t find yourself to regret it. And you knew that on some level Anakin had to have let it happen, it was nearly impossible to catch the Jedi by surprise. But the wide eyes he gave back to you could have had you fooled. You watched as his own hand came up to his cheek, touching the skin lightly, him mouth dropping open ever so slightly, his anger completely dissipating on the spot.
Yours, however, had yet to do so “You’re mad I disobeyed your ‘orders’ fine I can take that, but you do not get to treat me like this and you do not get to throw that kind of insinuation at me” you seethed back at him, hands clenched by your side so hard you could feel your nails digging into the palms.
“Y/N” and you name came out of his mouth on an exhale, a hand coming up to your elbow with a touch much softer than before, a plea in his eyes as he said it.
But you weren’t sure you could take any more of being in Anakin’s presence tonight. As you took a step back his hand fell easily from your arm and you tried to ignore the tingle on your skin it left in its place, tried to ignore the lump you could feel growing at the base of your throat, tried to ignore his silent plea for you to come back.
“Goodnight Jedi Skywalker” and before you could crumble you turned and walked back towards your rooms, hearing Anakin’s reluctant footsteps fall into place a few feet behind you.
-
You felt strangely energized the next morning at breakfast, shoveling food into your mouth as you jotted down notes and took pleasure in the fact that Anakin had yet to wake. Perhaps Jedi did need a full 8 hours of sleep. Senators, it would turn out, can survive on a fraction of that in combination with pure spite.
Your eyes barely glanced up at the sound of approaching footsteps that halted a few feet in front of your desk, taking no more than a second to note Anakin’s form as he stood before you.
“Y/N” your name came out of his mouth almost hesitantly, still you refused to look up at him just yet, pretending most of your attention was still captured by the document before you.
“Jedi Skywalker”
You heard a small sigh escape him, a hollow chuckle filling the air “back to titles huh”
“what can I do for you jedi?” you asked, interlacing your fingers and setting them before you, pushing your posture straighter as you looked up at him in front of your desk, not letting a single emotion betray you with your expression.
Another sigh and he held up a piece of paper before you “we’ve received our first official death threat against you” and though you knew it had to be coming a part of you expected to be more shook by the news, expected to be more scared, all you felt at this point, however, was tired. Tired of being on Coruscant, tired of your job, tired of dealing with every consequence that came from these threats.
“Ok” You could see Anakin’s expression melt a little at your simple reply, could see the pity and guilt plain on his face, you wanted neither “anything else?”
Anakin nodded slowly, placing the piece of paper on your desk, taking care to step back from you after he had done so “because of it we’re more or less going into lockdown, the only people permitted access to this room are the one’s on this list provided by your security team”
You scoffed slightly as your eyes scanned the list, noticing immediately that one name was missing “Jace isn’t on here”
Anakin’s tone dropped slightly, his hand going into a fist at his side as he repeated “the only people permitted access to this room are the one’s on this list”
You shook your head, a bitter laugh escaping as you threw the paper down onto your desk “you want me confined to my room fine, restrict who I have access to fine, one of those people will, however, be Jace, not only because he is my friend and I trust him but because he is instrumental to getting the work I need done”
And you could see him clench his jaw from across your desk, an angry hand running through his hair before he crossed his arms over his chest, eyes breaking from yours down to the paper before he sighed “fine”
And that put you off guard, if there was one thing you had learned about Anakin throughout your limited interaction it was that the man didn’t back down easily. Giving him a small nod you all but whispered a thank you, casting your eyes back down to your document, a silent dismissal.
The paper was wordlessly picked up from your desk before he started to leave, a new voice filling the silence left in his wake.
“Y/N I just heard-“ Jace’s voice was cut off suddenly, your eyes coming up from the document to see him in the doorway, held in place with a simple hand on his chest by Anakin, the jedi’s other hand resting on the hilt of his lightsaber as he glared down the man.
“he’s fine” you called out simply, eyes casting back down to the document without a second thought.
But you didn’t hear any change, Jace hadn’t started talking again, there had been no footsteps as he entered the room. Looking back up you saw the two men in the exact same position, glaring daggers into one another, each daring the other to make the first move.
“Jedi Skywalker he’s okay to come in” you instructed Anakin again, watching as the grip on his saber only tightened if anything.
“Anakin”
His gaze snapped to yours at the sound of his name, his expression softening ever so slightly as it did, his grip dropping from the saber.
“he’s okay”
And reluctantly he nodded, hand dropping from Jace’s chest as he righted himself, before his gaze snaped back to Jace, his next words coming out almost as a threat as he spoke them more to your friend than you “I’ll be just outside the door”
-
You’d be lying if you said you had forgotten about the other night, in fact you had done just about everything you could to do so, but despite your best efforts his insinuation still rang loudly in your head, his angry gaze as he spit the words at you still living in your minds eye, the fury that sparked in your chest then had yet to dwindle with time.
You tried to tell yourself that it didn’t really matter, so what if you were seeing Jace like that you were both single there would be no harm done. But another part of you hated the idea of Anakin thinking that, the same stupid, selfish, naive part of you that clung onto his every word and laugh that night.
But you had a job to do, a job that had pulled you halfway across a galaxy away from home to try and convince a small group of relevant senators that your position was correct and morally righteous which would be no small feat. That was exactly why you couldn’t have your attention pulled away from the matter at hand by some guy, least of all some guy as emotionally stunted as Anakin Skywalker.
“Y/N” you ignored the small plea from that very man, pointedly keeping your gaze on your notes as you paced back and forth from behind the stage.
Anakin sighed softly, an anxious hand running through his hair before he tried again “Y/N please I’m sorry I didn’t-“
“No” you cut him off simply, refusing to give him your attention, your anger, your anything. You had a job to do and he was being an active hinderance to that and you were not going to treat him as anything but that “I don’t want to hear it right now”
He nodded softly at that, gaze casting down to his shoes “yeah we can talk after your speech”
You scoffed at that, shaking your head before countering under your breath “or you can go back to ignoring me, I much preferred that”
Anakin furrowed his brow at that, taking a step closer to you “what do you-“
“Senator” one of your aides interrupted you with a smile, nodding her head towards the shut curtain before you “they’re ready for you”
“Thank you” you smiled back at her, squaring your shoulders and facing the curtain separating you from the stage, pointedly ignoring Anakin’s intense stare down at you.
Another soft sigh before he whispered “I’ll be off to the right side in case anything happens” and he was reaching for the curtain before you could respond, most likely knowing that you wouldn’t, holding it open for you to duck under slightly and be met by the bright lights and polite applause you were used to.
You smiled widely at the crowd as you walked up to the podium, setting your stack of notes on top of it and waving, giving them a practiced small nod and a polite “thank you senators”
Slowly the applause dwindled and you were faced with a silent room, milking the sound for just a moment before beginning “I want to thank you all for making time in your busy schedules-“ and you launched into the usual political fluff that began most speeches, stroking the senators egos before you got into the real meat of the issue.
You didn’t make it far, however, before you felt a sudden tug at your elbow, the force strong enough that you were pulled back from the microphone a few steps, a confused murmur making its way through the crowd before you.
Spinning around you followed the hand upon your elbow up to the jedi who owned it, only to see that he wasn’t staring down at you but rather up at the point where the walls met the ceiling, his eyes searching for something that was surely drowned out by the stage lights.
“What’s going on?” you asked him pulling your arm back into you, Anakin’s fingers not putting up a fight against it as he kept his gaze up, searching.
“we need to go” the words were spoken softly and with little weight only confusing you further.
“Anakin what-“ he cut you off before you could even get the question out, crashing his body into yours as he tackled you to the floor, arms wrapping around you to break your fall as he ducked the two of behind your podium. And you were ready to ask him again what was happening when you noticed it, a new burn mark on the wall just behind where your head had been moments ago.
It was only then that you realized the world had fallen silent on your ears, your mind tuning out the panicked yells and scraping of chairs as the people you had just been addressing scrambled for the exit.
Then there was a blaster sound.
The podium before you shook as it took the brunt of the shot, the furniture groaning telling you it wasn’t going to be able to take much more.
With wide eyes your gaze finally connected with Anakin’s to find his already on you, your name on his lips though you don’t remember hearing it.
“What?” You asked much too softly for the sound level in the room, a small look of relief still edging into Anakin’s eyes as he looked at you.
“There’s a door behind you to your left, I’ll cover you you make a break for it on the count of three” he instructed loudly but still calmly, the small panic in his eyes doing a fantastic job of never making its way to his voice. You nodded quickly at him, eyes darting over your shoulder to take a quick look at the door. His hand came up and squeezed your shoulder softly, pulling your gaze back to his “stay low okay. 1..2..3 go”
There wasn’t a moments hesitation before you broke for the door, no drop of doubt in Anakin’s promise to cover you before you left the safe haven of the podium, throwing yourself at the door to force it open and pushing it back closed behind Anakin the second he was through.
He never let up, however, not wasting any time before he grabbed you by the hand and pulled you off the door and down the hallway, you never fully being able to escape the panicked screams from that room.
“The others in there” you protested weakly, letting Anakin pull you further and further away from the room.
“Not important right now” he answered harshly, taking seemingly random turns down a labyrinth of hallways.
And your mind was spinning too much to protest any further, still struggling to bridge the gaps of the last few minutes and comprehend what had happened “did you see them?”
“No” Anakin grumbled “but I think the shot came from the vent system”
“So they could be anywhere by now”
Anakin didn’t respond to that, dragging you a few more feet forward before coming to an abrupt halt before a door you didn’t recognize, eyes checking both ways down the hall before throwing it open and ushering you inside, shutting the door behind the two of you.
It was jarring how silent it was within the room, the way the entire world seemed to suddenly stop spinning, finally giving you the chance to catch your breath, your mind reeling in such a way that made you wonder if you even really wanted the silence.
“Okay” Anakin spoke up, hand coming back to your shoulder, thumb hooked softly under your chin to physically pull your gaze to his as he hunched over slightly “you stay in here I’ll go-“
“What-“ the question came out before he could even finish his statement, your head shaking rapidly as you took a step back from him “you’re leaving me in here?”
“Just for a bit I need to track down-“
“No I can’t-” you interrupted him again, the same panic as before surging within you as you shook your head again, an anxious hand bunching up in your hair as you started to shift your weight from foot to foot “you can’t just- you can’t leave me here alone”
“Hey hey” and you could see his attempt to calm you down as he reached out, could see the fight behind his eyes between staying with you and finding the guy who shot at you, his hands resting on both of your shoulders halting your nervous movement “you’ll be safe in here but I need to track down-“
“Please” you interrupted him again, your single world making his argument die on his lips, his expression freezing slightly at the sound of it “Please Ani don’t leave me”
And you watched his chest deflate, a small nod before he answered “okay”
Before you could think better of it you surged forward, wrapping your arms around his torso, burying your face into his chest. Again there was a moment of hesitation, a brief hiccup before his arms wrapped around you in response, and you heard him mumble against your hair “I’ve got you, it’s going to be okay”
And at that words you let a shaky breath out, feeling the weight on your chest decrease slightly at the promise, nodding softly against him before slowly letting go, untangling your arms from him “Thank you”
His eyes bounced back and forth between your own for a second before he nodded softly, taring his gaze from you as he stood up straighter, taking a good look around the room “We’ll just wait here for a bit, the rest of the order is going to be working on tracking the shooter down”
You nodded back at him again, taking a few steps aside to rest against the wall, finally fully feeling yourself relax as a comfortable silence fell between the two of you.
“I really am sorry for what I said the other night” the sudden voice breaking the silence caught you by surprise, your brows furrowing as you looked up at him “I was angry and I took it out unfairly on you and for that I’m sorry”
“Is now really the time to be doing this?” you asked with an edge of frustration to your voice, trying to hide it behind a soft laugh.
“You’ve been refusing to talk to me, now’s the first time I’ve really had your attention” he shrugged as if it were the obvious conclusion.
“yeah well try dealing with that for about three years then you’re allowed to complain about feeling ignored to me” you grumbled crossing your arms over your chest, unsure if you had really wanted him to hear those words or not.
His brows furrowed as he looked down at you, genuine curiosity on his voice as he asked “what does that mean?”
And a part of you wanted to scoff, as if he hadn’t noticed how he’d treated you for the entirety of knowing him “This trip is the most I’ve ever talked to you” you huffed, pointedly avoiding eye contact with him “When I first met you you were nice and talkative and normal, and all of a sudden the next time I’m around you’re nothing but cold and distant, could get barely more than two words out of you at a time. Made me wonder what I had done wrong”
You heard his deep sigh at your words, eyes glancing up at his form to see his gaze planted on his shoes, a soft reply coming in a voice you almost couldn’t hear “you didn’t do anything wrong”
Another silence passed between the two of you before you broke it, unsure exactly why you felt the need to justify yourself to him “I get nightmares sometimes, nothing too bad but sometimes it’s like I forget where I am and I can’t breathe and I just need someone there to anchor me, to remind me that I’m okay. Jace has been that person for me a lot so when I woke up I sought him out, I really didn’t think about how I was sneaking out behind your back”
Another sigh came from across the room before you heard a back sliding against the wall, eyes casting up to see Anakin had moved to sitting on the ground, back resting against the wall, eyes planted somewhere across the room before he laughed almost hollowly “I’m an idiot aren’t I”
And you couldn’t help but chuckle at that, moving to sit down next to him, careful to keep a good amount of distance between the two of you as you did so “I mean I certainly won’t argue with you on that point”
And this time his chuckle was realer, a warm sound you felt yourself despite everything drawn into “you know you could’ve come to me”
“If the roles were reversed” you asked him with a soft, sad smile “would you have come to me?”
And he sighed at that, gaze breaking to study your face for a moment, before he shook his head “no I suppose I wouldn’t have”
Another silence fell between the two of you, this one considerably less uncomfortable than the ones before, and for a brief moment you wondered where exactly this left you and Anakin, certainly closer than before but friends? Is that what you wanted? Is just that what you could be okay with?
“The jedi have a code” Anakin’s voice pulled your attention smoothly back to him, finding him a few inches closer than before, you weren’t sure who it was that had shifted “we can’t form attachments”
And you found yourself focusing on how hard the words seemed to be for him to say, how he was practically pulling them out of himself, you eagerly latching onto each one, nodding softly.
“So when I met you and you were incredibly nice and funny and easy to talk to…” he let the end of his sentence hang in the air, let the implication remain unsaid “Obi-wan noticed it before I did, was over my shoulder reminding me of the code right away and I figured if I remained distant then I wouldn’t be tempted to break it”
You felt the air leave your chest realizing that hearing it form Jace was one thing but from Anakin himself was completely different, the last few years spent around him clicking into place in your mind and you felt the need to reach out to him, if not to just hold his hand in yours. “Then why are you my guard every time I need one on Coruscant” you asked instead, forcing the distance back, giving Anakin what he wanted, what he said he wanted “Wouldn’t it have been better to avoid me entirely?”
A bitter laugh came forth at that, Anakin throwing his head back against the wall as he stared up at the ceiling “yeah, yeah it would have.” He paused briefly, a small smile pulling up at the edges of his lips “do you know how excited I get every time I hear you’re going to be on Coruscant? I tell myself every time that I just want to make sure you’re safe, that I want to be able to see for myself that no harm comes to you, but I know they’re all just excuses. Because even if it’s in complete silence I relish every moment spent in your presence”
And a huge part of you felt relief at his words. Relief that your feelings were reciprocated, relief that he didn’t actually hate you as you suspected, relief that it was all finally out in the open. But still there was a new weight on your chest, the burden of the jedi code no longer resting on Anakin’s shoulder’s alone, a burden that as not a jedi it felt unfair for you to carry.
“Where does that leave us now?” you asked quietly, eyes bouncing back and forth between his hopefully.
“The jedi order have their faults” he started after a bit, gaze skipping around the room, everywhere but meeting yours “there’s a few things I just don’t agree with them on and one of them is that having attachments makes me a worse jedi, I’m starting to wonder if remaining at a distance from you is really worth it, after this past week I’m not sure I can do it anymore”
“what if I don’t want you to remain at a distance?” you asked softly, watching almost with amusement as Anakin’s gaze rushed to meet your own, his eyes searching yours with hope for sincerity.
Finally his lips turned up at your words, he gaze flicking down to your lips for a moment, inching himself closer still till your shoulder grazed his “Darling if that’s the case then I shall live to make you regret asking me to stay close”
815 notes · View notes
pianocat939 · 11 months
Note
hearing you out on the yan pavitr
Tumblr media
YES PLEASE- ok I'm gonna start out this new thing where I separate things for romantic + platonic so people can scroll to different sections. (I'm such a good business person- /j)
I will copy and paste some of the headcanons because they apply both ways. So don't bother reading both unless if you want to because for the most part they're the same (with some light editing)
Tw: hardly any tbh-, delusional softie, uh- and breaking in
Yandere Pavitr Prabhakar
Type: Delusional + Clingy (This is really fucking obv ngl)
Romantic
Listen- He literally gives off so much delusional that I can't even tell you why he's delusional because it's literally written all over him omg. Now, the thing he is delusional about is you love him back. It's not in a malicious way; he genuinely thinks you love him.
He's not in any sort of way problematic or concerning with his actions/intentions. He'll be all caring and constantly giving you support. He's the type of guy who wakes up at five in the morning to go buy you a bouquet of flowers to greet you with when you get up.
If you try to push him away or express that you don't love him he just believes you're a troubled person and need more support in your life. Which means more affection from him. He is your therapist. He will be whether you like it or not because he is a softie and will continue to be a softie.
The only time I can see him getting the slightest bit aggressive is if he gets jealous. I'm not entirely sure yet because we haven't seen too much of any trauma or negative backstory to him (Uncle Ben's death canon event doesn't fucking count). I think he's about a medium level when it comes to how easily he gets jealous. Even then I don't think he would outwardly hurt anyone unless they've overstepped a boundary of his. He'll give them a slight threat or tie them up in webs for a while.
Now if anyone hurts you? Bro is going crazy- he will do everything to make the person surrender or maybe even die (if they've caused him enough anger) He'll worry so much if you get hurt. I wouldn't say he would overreact, but he definitely worries.
He is physically affectionate 100%. He will sneak in your window at night for snuggles. Imagine yourself standing at your window one night, knowing he'll come. He arrives and is about to slip inside when you frown and tell him no. He is going to give you the most heartbreaking face known to mankind.
He WILL call you embarrassing/cringe affectionate names. You can't convince me he doesn't.
"Jasmine flower! Look at the stuffie I got you!" *proceeds to hold up giant elephant stuffie*
Platonic
He literally gives off so much delusional that I can't even tell you why he's delusional because it's literally written all over him omg. Now, the thing he is delusional about is he thinks you wanna be friends with him. It's not in a malicious way; he genuinely thinks you guys are besties and constantly hang out. (tbh I feel anyone would be friends with him???)
He's not in any sort of way problematic or concerning with his actions/intentions. He'll be all caring and constantly giving you support. He's the type of guy who wakes up at five in the morning to go buy you your favourite drink or line up for a limited edition product.
If you try to push him away or express that you don't wanna be friends with him, he just believes you're a troubled person and need more support in your life. Which means more affection and suggesting hangouts or giving gifts from him. He is your therapist. He will be whether you like it or not, because he is a softie and will continue to be a softie.
The only time I can see him getting the slightest bit aggressive is if he gets jealous. I'm not entirely sure yet because we haven't seen too much of any trauma or negative backstory to him (Uncle Ben's death canon event doesn't fucking count). I think he's about a medium level when it comes to how easily he gets jealous. Even then I don't think he would outwardly hurt anyone unless they've overstepped a boundary of his. He'll give them a slight threat or tie them up in webs for a while.
Now if anyone hurts you? Bro is going crazy- he will do everything to make the person surrender or maybe even die (if they've caused him enough anger) He'll worry so much if you get hurt. I wouldn't say he would overreact, but he definitely worries.
He is a clinger 100%. He will sneak in your window at night for a hug and to talk about random things (he giggles a lot). Imagine yourself standing at your window one night, knowing he'll come. He arrives and is about to slip inside when you frown and tell him no. He is going to give you the most heartbreaking face known to mankind.
He WILL call you embarrassing/cringe affectionate names. You can't convince me he doesn't. Like Pookie Bear or just cringe names to call your best friend platonically cuz it's funny.
"My rat! Look! I have- WEBS!" *proceeds to shoot webs like it's a discovery even though he's known for six months*
——————————————————
That's all I got for now-
I still don't like Gwen.
- Celina
1K notes · View notes
aeithalian · 10 months
Text
Hermes: the ultimate middle child
And now for the other promised meta!
There was a great discussion on the TOA discord earlier that I got the chance to read once it was over that was basically exactly what I wanted to talk about - Hermes as a character and how he is very subtly contrasted with Apollo in multiple ways.
First, for a curiosity I've had ever since I finished TON. We learn several very interesting things about Hermes in the scene when Apollo returns to the Council:
He initiated the bets on Apollo's success (and then has the nerve to say he was worried about Apollo)
He bet against Apollo (and it was enough money to make him look visibly upset by the loss)
He was not among the gods who looked happy at Zeus' proclamation of Apollo's success (Artemis makes sense for being happy, Dionysus makes sense for not, but Hermes is supposedly a close brother figure in the myths, so what gives?)
He immediately suggested that Apollo cause outright harm to some mortals with his renewed power, despite displaying no such malice in his previous appearances
There is an interesting play of contrast here when you look at Hermes' other notable scene in the Riordanverse - his conversation with Percy at the end of TLO.
Hermes is generally portrayed as much more serious right here. He's grieving Luke's death at this point, but Hermes knew that was coming, and this demeanor is consistent with his other appearances up until this point: put-together, down-to-business, pragmatic, and so on.
This doesn't seem like the same person we see at the end of TON: making jokes, placing bets, and the like. And THEN you go back to the myths and the Hermes there seems much more similar to the one we meet in TON.
My point being, there is a very obvious disconnect here between who Hermes used to be, who he is now, and who he is pretending to be.
And it has a lot to do with Zeus, and as a result, Apollo.
I think there's a twofold reason for this dichotomy: one, Hermes and Apollo have fundamentally contradictory views on both fate and change which have larger implications for Hermes' overall morality; and two, Hermes resents Apollo for being Zeus' favorite when Apollo probably doesn't deserve it (or Hermes believes he deserves it more).
Part I: Fate and Change
I'd like to go back to that conversation between Percy and Hermes at the end of The Last Olympian. The entire conversation is so strange to me: here's a sixteen-year-old who has never had a positive father figure in his life (save Paul, who is still a recent addition to his family at this point) trying to comfort a 4,000-year-old god that he's not a bad father:
"I thought you were a bad father," I admitted. "I thought you abandoned Luke because you knew his future and didn't do anything to stop it."
The main point of that conversation comes from Hermes' response to Percy's statement. To paraphrase, Hermes says 'I couldn't have saved Luke, it's against the laws and I can't defy the fates. I loved him, yes, but I couldn't save him. Those laws aren't going to change anytime soon, and neither are the gods.'
What we get from this conversation is this: Hermes was resigned to being unable to help Luke because he views the future as inevitable and the Fates as all-powerful (as does Zeus). He also doesn't believe that gods can change in the ways Percy wants them to; he scoffs at the idea that Percy's proposed changes will be permanent:
"No one can tamper with fate, Percy. Not even a god."
and then:
He laughed. "After three thousand years, you think gods can change their nature?"
To Hermes? Fate is inevitable and the gods can't change.
On the other hand, to Apollo? The future is behind any number of unlocked doors, and the only thing stopping the gods from changing are themselves:
[Regarding Frank burning his stick in TTT] "Frank went into that tunnel knowing he might die. He willingly sacrificed himself for a noble cause. In doing so, he broke free of his own fate. By burning his own tinder, he kind of... I don't know, started a new fire with it. He's in charge of his own destiny now."
Frank broke free of his fate, and the way Apollo talks about it indicates that he believes that such things are certainly possible.
And this:
[After regaining his godhood in TON] I could only try to be different from [Zeus]. Better. More... human.
Apollo intends to change the way he acts now that he is returned to Olympus, and has the support of everyone else who noted that he has already grown as a person: Jason, Sally, Will, Reyna, and so many more.
I feel like Hermes has always felt that he has the excuse of being a god when Percy asks him to do better for the sake of Luke's memory: "We gods have never been very good at keeping oaths." and "Eventually we'll become forgetful. We always do." and generally lots of other sentiments that give the impression that he believes that failure to do right by mortals is inevitable for gods. He's been so used to thinking that Luke was resigned to his fate from the very beginning, and that Hermes was never capable of changing it. Hermes didn't fail because he didn't try to succeed.
But Apollo ruins that for him when he returns - Apollo has not and will not let that same excuse stop him, and now Hermes is losing the only reason he had for not helping Luke. If Hermes is right, that gods can never help their mortal children and Luke was born to die at Kronos' hand, it was excusable for Hermes to turn his back on his own son. But if Apollo is right that gods can change and you can shape your own destiny, then it was Hermes and his inaction that killed Luke, not Kronos.
And we know that Apollo is right. Apollo did defy his fate. Apollo did change. And Hermes saw it all from the safety of his throne on Olympus.
Which means that Hermes was always wrong, and he knows it now. Hermes says that not helping Luke was the hardest thing he's ever done, because it would have amounted to nothing. Hermes thought he was completely incapable of helping Luke, but Apollo is living proof that he could have.
So now, Apollo is a daily reminder that Hermes failed Luke. Every day.
That would be enough to drive a wedge between any two people, much less two gods. And I don't think Apollo would ever truly realize that this is the case, so one day, Hermes is going to break, and Apollo will be left blindsided.
It only makes sense that Hermes might have some very heavy clown makeup on when we see him at the end of TON. I can't speak for him when we talk about the gambling, but I bet it's because Hermes, like he did with Luke, thought that Apollo would be resigned to his death the very moment Delphi-Python said that "Apollo will fall". And the fact that Apollo survived against all the odds (and seemingly against the Fates themselves) is just another smack to the face. I believe his behavior and comments in this scene are him lashing out in anger and frustration at the solid fact of the matter; that Hermes failed his own family, which is something he values to no end.
That's got to suck.
But now I think we have to closely examine why Hermes believes those things. Hermes has been brainwashed in a sense to believe that he can't defy fate and can't change. By who, then?
Do I really need to answer that? You have a brain. It's obvious, isn't it?
Part II: The fight to be the golden child
Let's rewind a bit, shall we?
The entire discussion had over on discord was started with talking about the potentials of Apollo's relationships with Ares and the rest of his siblings, then someone (I believe it was @fearlessinger, along with some very valid points made by uke) said this:
...but Ares, who was always the least favored of Zeus's children, the family's scapegoat, and who gave up on trying to get on Zeus's good side basically as soon as he was born and deemed a failure… he of all ppl would actually have no reason to resent Apollo for his success, nor for throwing away that success
To which I replied:
so i wonder then who has the reason to resent Apollo the most?... it’s probably a son, because they’re the ones who have to fight the most for Zeus’ approval ... maybe Hermes? because he’s never really done anything wrong and still doesn’t receive the title he deserves ...
To summarize: Apollo was the golden child, and used to be Zeus' favorite. We are certain he faces a lot of resentment for this fact (he admits to it himself), and Hermes definitely fits the bill.
Think about it.
Besides Luke, what has Hermes ever done that would put him out of the running for golden child? He's useful, talented, powerful enough to be on the Council, and despite being a god of liars and thieves, is work-driven enough that his father still trusts him. Even in the myths, he's clever in a very Zeus-y way.
Apollo, on the other hand, acts like a complete and utter fool pre-trials. He's vain, self-centered, and shallow. He's a chronic attention-seeker, and, in the myths tried to overthrow Zeus, and had angered him to the point of turning him mortal, not once, but twice. So what gives? Why is Apollo the favorite son, and not Hermes?
Honestly, I couldn't say, besides vague suggestions that it's because Zeus likes the idea of having the powerful and popular son as a favorite, rather than the less noticeable behind-the-scenes son. But who knows how Zeus and his favoritism work. Apollo doesn't, and I don't think Hermes does either.
I rather think Hermes is, as I said in the title, the ultimate middle child. Overlooked by his father in favor of his siblings, whether they be rebellious (Apollo), perfect in every way (Athena or Artemis) or just plain failures (Ares or Dionysus). In comparison, Hermes is invisible, having never done anything to make him stand out in the eyes of his father, nor having done anything that deserves a strict punishment. Nothing worthy of attention.
I've seen people wonder why Hermes never suffered the same consequences for Luke's actions in the way Apollo did for Octavian. But that's because Hermes never broke Zeus' fundamental law: do not interact with your mortal children.
The problems Octavian caused were supposedly because Apollo defied Zeus and created a forbidden connection with his legacy.
On the other hand, the problems Luke caused were because Hermes obeyed Zeus to the letter.
Why would Zeus punish Hermes for being obedient? And why wouldn't Zeus punish Apollo for breaking the 'ancient laws'?
Arguably, Hermes is Zeus' best behaved child (which is ironic, considering a few notable domains of his). Hermes is one of a trend that we see a lot with toxic parents who don't give attention and approval freely - Hermes and Apollo are on opposite sides of this spectrum. Apollo in the past has acted out in order to gain attention, whereas Hermes has glued himself to Zeus' side in an attempt to be perfect.
And this perfection includes indoctrinating into Zeus' belief systems and fears. Zeus fears the inevitability of fate. So does Hermes. Zeus refuses to let the gods change. So Hermes believes change impossible. Zeus says that you may not have contact with your mortal children. And although to Hermes this is the hardest of all, he turns his back on Luke.
And yet, 'golden child' is still not his title to claim. That rests with Apollo, still, who has not met Zeus' standards, openly rejects Zeus' belief systems, and yet continues to rise above the rest.
That is the formula for a deteriorating relationship between brothers: Apollo's mere existence being an everyday reminder to Hermes that he is a failure both to his son and to his father.
Everyone say hello to our old friend resentment.
Now, I'm not necessarily saying that Hermes and Apollo's relationship is inherently negative. But there's a lot of reason for there to be some contention coming from Hermes (and I didn't even touch on May Castellan - basically, I think Apollo refused to oversee her attempt to become the next Oracle because he knew it wouldn't work, which is why he wasn't present for May's attempt, but was for Rachel's; later on, Hermes could start seeing Apollo's domain and subsequent absence as the thing that drove her mad).
We don't have a lot of hints for whether or not he plans to act on those feelings of resentment. But they're there. And in a new, post-trials Olympus, they're going to come to light sooner or later.
Because Percy was right.
"I thought you were a bad father," I admitted. "I thought you abandoned Luke because you knew his future and didn't do anything to stop it."
That's exactly what happened. And because of Apollo, Hermes now knows it.
(a list of my other metas if you'd like to read)
And a very special shoutout to @firealder2005 for writing this absolutely gut-wrenching and angsty but super cool fic based around this very idea that i am absolutely in love with and everyone should go read it ❤️
692 notes · View notes
pandorascripts · 1 year
Note
heyyy :) can i request wednesday x reader where she sneaks into wednesdays room to sleepover and enid was sleeping in yokos room for the night and forgot smth and went back to their dorm and walks in on them making out?
fugly slut
summary: enid catches her OTP (who said they weren’t together) snogging. she’s pissed and had Mean Girls on her mind.
warnings: making out, wee bit spicy, swearing
paring: wednesday addams x reader
note: written quickly, proof read a bit, not sure if there’s any mistakes :^
————
You watch as Enid’s retreating form bounces merrily off the walls. Wednesday had told you to come over tonight, it’d be safe seeing as her roommate was crashing with a friend. Most people would’ve told you that it’s a bad thing to go into a relationship and hiding it, but seeing as you and Wednesday are academic rivals, the two of you don’t want the school knowing. 
You tap on the door four times, letting Wednesday know it was safe, and a second later you’re dragged through. A rough yelp is muffled as Wednesday presses her lips against yours, her left hand fumbling to lock the door.
You hold her head with both hands, pressing her back into yourself. With the door now locked, Wednesday grabs your hips, hiking your shirt upwards. She doesn’t take it off, much to your dismay, instead she pushes you around and against a wall. 
“No one likes a tease, Wednesday,” you whisper, donning an uncontrollable smirk.
“You’ll get what you want in due time, no need to be greedy.”
You chuckle, although it doesn’t last long. With Wednesday’s lips now on your neck your laugh dies out, a shaky sigh taking place. Featherlight lips make their way down, pressing into the small portion of your shoulder that was exposed. 
Wednesday’s hands grab your shirt, lifting it up and off, before quickly attaching her lips to yours again. Your hands grab Wednesday’s jacket, wanting it off as well, but then the worst thing you could imagine happens. 
The door opens. 
Enid liked to say she loved people. She loved how no matter how moody or damaged they were, there was always an innocent soul underneath. No one was truly evil, no one truly wanted to hurt others, they had unfortunate incidents in their lives in which cause them to act accordingly. 
But as Enid walked into her dorm, after forgetting a blanket, and saw her two best friends, who had both assured Enid they despised each other, making out, she realized people were liars. They were crude, and pests, and no one deserved to be on this Earth. Liars suck, and a thought crossed her mind. That thought happened to be a line from Mean Girls.
“You are the nastiest skank bitch I’ve ever met!” she shouts, stomping over. “You two told me you weren’t screwing!”
Wednesday takes off her jacket, handing to you so you were at least decent for this conversation. 
“Enid —“
“No! I’ve been trying for months to get you two together, and you don’t even tell me when it happens? What am I, chopped liver?”
“We’re trying to keep it on the down low, Enid,” you speak up, looking charmingly disheveled.
Enid’s eyes flicker away from Wednesday’s settling on yours. “You told me you’d rather die than get with Wednesday.”
You shrug. “I’d rather die than do anything, really.”
“Not helping!” Wednesday whisper shouts, looking over to you. In a much more hushed tone, she says, “You look very attractive in my clothing. Look through my closet later.”
An angry grunt from Enid cuts off your reply, your smirk dropping as you stare at your socks. 
“I hate the both of you.”
“Enid, I’ll buy you that Squishmallow you’ve been begging for if you go back to Yoko’s.” Wednesday turns to you, out of sight from Enid, and winks. 
“Really?! OH-EM-GEE!” she squeals, rushing up to Wednesday as she hugs her. “I love you. Alls forgiven, be gay do crime!” 
With that, Enid leaves the room, waking all of Ophelia Hall with her screams.
You lean back against the wall, sighing. 
“Well.” You pout, night spoiled and one more person knowing your secret. 
Wednesday walks up to you, the devilish smile you love so much and the mischievous glint in her eyes back again.
“Well, the dog has left, and we’ve got this huge dorm to ourselves…”
Wednesday’s hand brushes against your arm as she rests it on your bicep. Her other hand holds your waist. 
“And you look so incredible in my clothes.”
You smile, leaning down into her face. Neither of you say anything, sharing hot breaths and mischievous smiles. With your lips practically against hers, you know damn well what she’s thinking. 
1K notes · View notes
razzle-n-dazzle · 1 month
Note
Yandere Mammon. Do it (you don't have to if you don't want. I just saw you wanted mammon requests specifically and I felt called)
ᯓ★ "I LOVE you like an ALCOHOLIC" Yandere! Mammon / Reader | Drabble, (and some practice)
Tumblr media
‗ content / trigger warning: GLORIFYING YANDERE/OBESSIVE BEHAVIOR, dark romance, toxic relationship, not proof read (we die like Adam). hurt/comfort, mammon scaring the reader, threats of physical abuse, MAMMON APOLOGIZING???
‗ author's note: ngl, Mammon is like the worst rest flag you can have but also why is the bastard so loveable? I want someone to explain that to me.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
"MAYBE THERE WAS NO WAY OUT OF THIS; MAYBE THIS, WAS MEANT TO BE YOUR FATE."
"BABE!" Came the gruff voice, the loud voice, the ever so demanding voice that snarled your pet name as though it was the last thing it wanted to do; and you were sure that was the case, especially after he had to come case after you like this. Mammon was not much of a chaser for what was his, he simply expected it, you know that fact well; And now, with trembling hands covering your mouth as you tried to cover your sobs, hunched over in a corner of your bedroom trying to silence your sobbing, you thought you should have headed the warning. The warning to stay put, the warning to listen to him, to accept whatever he had to tell you. The warning to not go back to the lust ring. A foolish warning, you had thought first, but now knew why he was so stern on such a rule. He wanted to keep you from Ozzie, he wanted to keep you from Fizz, he wanted to keep you from the outside world if you weren't right by his side; If he couldn't monitor you and make sure you were "safe" and no one "dared tried to fuck you over". And sure those had been his words, the lies that he fed into your pretty brain once upon a time as his played with your hair, promising to always keep you safe. . . But you weren't so sure you could trust such words now.
You had only gone back home to speak with Ozzie, to catch up with him and share how your lives had been fairing since you left the Lust Ring. You had never told him why, granted, as he would have surely freaked out hearing that you left to be with Mammon of all people, and you were sure Fizzarolli would have hated your guts. So you had left under the guise of having met someone new, of testing the waters of living with them . . . and Ozzie had been happy with that response, though a bit uneasy upon your constant dancing around who your new lover could be. It's not like Ozzie would have burnt them to crisp, Fizz had joked, but you knew differently. Ozzie absolutely hated Mammon's guts after the clown pageants that Fizz was still recovering from. He would have scolded me relentlessly, though also in the end said he would be there if I ever needed anything if I was in trouble; Knowing how Mammon could get. You would have blown him off, saying Mammon was not that kind of person to you and it would be alright. That you loved him, that he loved you, and no it wasn't any sort of weird love potion or crystal and it wasn't forced. You had loved him, truly and fully and deeply and you still do. . . yet that love was slowly muddling with anxiety and hatred as you heard his spider legs tap against the floors of Ozzie's apartment, slyly getting closer to your bedroom. "Baabe," His 'a' was dragged out, his voice ever so sweeter, honeyed to convivence you to come out of the room without him having to use force. His hands pressed against the door, "I know you're in there sweetheart, just come on out and we can talk! I promise." Yet his words only caused you to shrink more into yourself, hiding your face away from the door on the most likely chance that Mammon would knock it down, forcing his way into your room. Into the one place that you still had felt safe in, safety which was now dwindling. My bedroom, well Ozzie's guest bedroom in the flat Fizz and him shared, was the one place you had thought to run too when Mammon hatched from his larva egg; Having grown in size and towered over you.
He had gotten upset as soon as he realized you had gone to the Lust Ring behind his back, accusing you of having cheated him and having cheated on him with Ozzie or even Fizz! Which was absurd, and you quickly tried to explain that Ozzie was simply like a brother to you and you would have never betrayed his trust by trying to get with him nor Fizz! You had simply gone had gone to catch up with Ozzie and Fizz and nothing more! You swore by it on your life, all while slowly shrinking away from Mammon in fear. Fear . . . Terror . . . Worry, Anxiety! You should never have to feel any of those things about Mammon, you should only feel secure around him and loved by him and likewise he should feel the same. Yet the way your heart pounded in your chest, the way your tears fell down your face, it was all too much and you knew this wasn't love. At least, it didn't feel like love but in a weird way it also did. He cared enough to come after you; He still stabbed any person who dared tried to get close to you; He just wanted to make sure you were okay! Right? Were you over reacting? Some part of you screamed no, shouting and pleading as the bangs on the door started to grow louder. You hadn't noticed them before they threatened to start breaking down the door, where their pounding brought nothing but a sickening feeling in your stomach that curled and churned and knotted inside you, wanting to be puked out and swallowed all the same. You help back a scream, hearing the last blow before the door was slammed open. It gave a devastating swing the wall, crashing against it and helplessly getting as stuck as you felt right now. Your breathing became ragged, your body trembled as your hesitated to look up and towards the crawling that was no other than Mammon, slithering his way towards you. Hide, Hit, Yell, Scream! But your body just froze as Mammon took a pause at the center of the room, and you weren't quiet sure why he did so yet you were too terrified to find out. You did your best to curl around yourself, to make yourself small and hide and hopefully avoid any sort of punishment that was to come from your small little mistake. Was it small? No it had to be a big one for Mammon to be acting like this, right? It's not like he's ever made you feel like this before, the rush of adrenaline you only get when faced with the possibility of death looming over you. Never. . . he's never. . . "Babe," Mammon's voice came out softer, less echoey and less demanding as it had been, though you still refused to look up. You barely heard the "shit" that Mammon had muttered from under his breath as he still stood in the center of the room, unsure what to do now that he finally got a good look of the state you were in. His top pair of hands subconsciously rubbed together, his right over the back side of his left palm; The actions he had taken replaying in his mind with a feeling of disgusting regret filling his stomach. This is now how he wanted this to go, not at all; He only wanted to give you a little scare, a small seed of terror, to show you how much he cared and yet . . . he caused this to happen. It was for the better no? . . . oh but he couldn't stand seeing you like this, in this state. You shouldn't be cowering away from him, no matter how fucking sexy it looked, you should be cowering away from others behind him! "Fuck, Babe I'm-" Mammon helplessly started once more as he extended his arms out, trying to gather some sort of explanation or reason or apology he could give to you. Yet his words fell flat, and everything he was going to say to you didn't feel right or it felt like some half-assed excuse or apology strung up by some lazy PR team just trying to sweep some incident under the rug like it had never happened. And Mammon was a bit lost on what do to. . . so then he did the only thing he could even fathom of doing to try and comfort you.
Slowly, evenly, he would make his way over to you, trying to make his footsteps rather loud and clear, yet paced and even to show you he was trying to think more rationally, more clearly. You still didn't look up and flinched at time from the steps. So then, he made it to you, and looked over your smaller figure next to his for a moment before he slowly sat down next to you. Silence; It was deafening to the ears. You were too afraid to speak. Mammon was too afraid of making the situation worse than it already was. What could he do in a situation like this? Pat your back?. . . actually that didn't sound like a half-bad idea, you always liked some sort of comfort through contact or PDA while around Mammon! And yet when he went to go do so, you only flinched away from him and drove yourself further against the wall, if that was even possible at this point, and Mammon lowered his hand back down with a frown.
Fuck you weren't ready yet for that. Okay! But he was sorry, he needed to show it to you and you couldn't be a whiney bitch about it either; He was trying to give this a shot! But then again wasn't there, like, boundaries he should respect?? This love thing was all too complex for Mammon, it hurt his brain trying to get everything right, and yet. . . it always felt rewarding whenever he had to by his side or sat upon his lap. It felt rewarding to even look in your direction and know he managed to snag someone like you, to get someone like you . . . someone so perfect . . . to love him back despite everything. It felt rewarding just to be in your presence, to be by you. It was an odd feeling that stirred Mammon's chest, it was an odd feeling he didn't know much about yet wanted to explore while he explored you. It was an odd feeling that delivered highs and lows that not even money could give him. It was an odd feeling only you can give him. . . And he hadn't realized he began to spew all this out to you; "-And that's why I got like, upset, Babe! I thought if you went back to the Lust Ring and feel in love with some fucking hot shot like Ozzie, or the fucking bastard ass clown Fizz, or some . . . GUY here that I would lose you!" He tried explaining the best he could, though his heart felt like it wanted to vomit. "I didn't want you going to some weird ass who could only give you half of what I can too! Babe, I'm fucking all you need and you're all I fucking need, and I didn't-. . . I shouldn't have-. . ." There was a pause in Mammon's words as his face scrunched, trying to find the correct way to phrase what he wanted to say. He barely noticed the fact that you had raised your face to look up at him, even if you were just peaking through your arms. "FUCK! I lost my train of thought." He would shout soon after, shaking his head as though he was disappointed in himself. So, instead, he would snake an arm around your waist and pull you upon his lap, even though he had felt you jump and jolt, trying to pull away from his touch.
And still, you sat ever so stiffly in his lap and yet. . . it felt right, for you both. It felt right for Mammon to have you on him, it felt like bliss, he was sure he could just jack off to this if he wasn't concerned about you! And . . . it oddly felt like home for you. Even still stiff and unsure about being this close to Mammon after what happened, you still leaned against him as you usually did. Fear and love, it was an odd combination that nestled itself into your heart whenever you now thought about Mammon. Yet, all the same, your heart and brain agreed he was home. "Babe, what I'm trying to fucking say is I'm s-" Mammon started, trying to apologize yet quickly felt sick to his stomach and gagged. The word felt so foreign and disgusting, he never had to 'apologize' before! And yet, when he glanced down at you and saw the small look of shock in your widened eyes, mixed with some sparkle of hope, he tried again . . . to only gag once more before he could choke out the sorry. And you were sure you both would be sitting here for eternity, and he would never be able to choke out a sorry. Even a pathetic one for your sake. It was just how Mammon was, for being the Sin of Greed he was ever so Prideful as well, and that always came at some sort of price. Yet, he was trying. . . that had to mean something, right? . . . it had to mean that he truly cared, somewhere deep inside that small heart of his, he cared; Truly cared. It was also amusing to watch him struggle. He never struggled often.
Tumblr media
Home | Masterlist tag list | @lily-ann-b
ᯓ★ All posts/fanfictions posted under this blog is owned by @razzle-n-dazzle. Please do not steal, copy, or plagiarize the works! Likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated.
133 notes · View notes
vivgst · 1 month
Text
COD Headcanons
I mean they're not hc it's just shit I think they say/do but I needed the title okay?
As I previously said this is just my silly little opinion, I would love to read yours but don't take this too personal and I'm saying this cause Imma bout to write SHIT about two characters and I'm scared cause they're loved by the whole fandom.
Okay thats all thanks<3333
Let's start with my favorite piece of shit, shall we?
Alejandro Vargas
Tumblr media
I don't care what yall say this man is a CHEATER and he would make you feel guilty about it too because you're not "meeting his needs".
“I’m not sexist???? We cannot do the same things, it's basic biology!”
Maybe he's good in bed, let's give him that.
Alain meza said he loved Rudy so let's assume he's bi, uh... he wouldn't admit that shit, not in a million years, probably would get offended if you even dare to suggest it.
He doesn’t argue to fix things, he argues to repeat how much in the right he is, I feel like he NEVER admits he’s in the wrong, he seems very stubborn.
Now can we address that fucking temper of his? Breathe mf, no ones gonna die if you stop yelling for a second.
I feel like he must’ve had A LOT of trouble when he just joined the army because of his anger issues, think about it for a moment: someone with a higher rank yelling at him and you think he just took it? I doubt it.
MUST HAVE fought with Valeria more than once cause that temper of hers is just as shitty.
I promise I don’t hate him, well I do but he’s one of my favs, I don’t know how to explain this bye.
Simon Riley
Tumblr media
He’s very chill I love him <3
I think of him like a very nostalgic man, he thinks a lot about his past, past lovers, past experiences, when he was new in the army, you know? Not in a “I’m still traumatized” way, he’s just nostalgic.
He’s absent minded, he’s always daydreaming (when he’s not doing something important ofc).
Thin and I don’t fucking care, THAT MAN IS THIN, you can even see it sometimes!!!! He’s got chicken legs, I love them.
He really seems to enjoy dad jokes.
He cares a lot about his teammates and I love it, it’s very cute.
Can we talk about how everyone put him as a fucking beast in bed? I don't see it, I think he's ruthless when he needs to but I don't think this applies when it comes to sex, he suffered a lot too and sadly I know too well that sex is pretty fucking terrible after rape, especially because you feel like you're gonna hurt the person you're having sex with so...
John MacTavish
Tumblr media
Typa guy everyone loves, even your dad and your grandma's always saying how handsome he is.
Maybe he was bullied bc of his accent but he just told them to go fuck themselves.
Caring and loving, buys his partner flowers and their favorite candy/chocolates/desserts.
Remembers anniversaries, birthdays, medical or school appointments.
Too charismatic and funny.
Kyle Garrick
Tumblr media
He’s too good for his own good… I feel like he always end up going out with INSANE people, the jealous type, they’re always bitching and making him angry and stressed but he forgives them cause he’s an angel.
Very sweet, loves cooking for people he loves.
Kinda family oriented.
He smells good, I can almost smell his perfumeeeeee he smells good, he spends MONEY on it too.
Even the devil is afraid of him when he’s mad.
I think he's very private about his life in general, doesn't like to vent his problems.
Hot lover.
John Price
Tumblr media
Now this man is a FATHER, my fucking dad I swear.
He seems pretty conservative to me, not in a bad way like he wants you to be his personal maid and slave, more like he wants to date to marry, hates casual sex.
Loves whiskey.
Dad energy, he would be so caring and loving with his child, he would give that baby the moon.
I don’t think he would love to date a younger woman, not a woman in her twenties at least, I think he would be into women his age.
If you feel disappointment by that, maybe you could try fixing your relationship with your dad, sweetheart ;).
Hates confrontation and loves to work things out.
Let’s not talk about how sex with be with the old man, okay? Thanks.
He's not that old, I get that but he looks like he's fucking 68.
Phillip Graves
Tumblr media
He looks kinda daddy in that pic, not gonna lie.
“How come you don��t want to have sex? What about me? Have you thought about how that makes me feel? If your head hurts, sex would help but you never consider me, I’ll sleep in the couch”.
A selfish, self-centered bitch, only thinks about himself.
Feeling good having sex with him? Aw baby, try again cause this mf would use you like a damn toy and he couldn’t care less about your feelings or how much pain you’re in.
Cheater, he wouldn’t even be quiet about it. “Oh you want to divorce me? And where are you gonna go, sugar? You’re nothing without me”.
Doesn’t fucking know where the clit is, he doesn’t have a fucking clue.
Of course straight, loves to be white and American.
“Of course I can say whatever I want, I’m from America I have freedom of speech”.
Fuck you graves.
Rodolfo Parra
Tumblr media
Perfect.
He seems so sweet and kind and considerate I love him.
Smart as hell, probably got the best grades when he was a kid.
Doesn’t hate anyone, no one hates him.
Loves nature and animals but he can’t enjoy it too much cause he is always busy.
Dreams about having a big family and a dog (a golden, probably).
Forget about having rough sex UNLESS he’s mad (fr mad like losing his shit but that doesn’t happen frequently).
Could be a teacher if he wasn’t in the army, he’s very patient and can explain things easily.
Have a pretty smile.
Valeria Garza aka MAMI
Tumblr media
Feels like she needs to prove something, she was underestimated for so long in the army that now she’s always trying to prove to herself how badass and good at her job she is.
Almost no one knows the real Valeria, her favorite things, music taste, if she prefers cold or hot, coffee or tea etc.
She hates cold weather with all her MIGHT.
Likes to smoke only when she’s stressed.
Likes animals but thinks they’re so much work and she doesn’t have the time.
Did drugs once and hated it.
Feels guilty when she spots a church but she WOULD NEVER admit this shit to anyone.
Used to the worst of life so she didn’t like when someone is kind with her, is like “tf am I supposed to do with it???” but she gets used to it eventually.
I don’t think she has anger issues but def she doesn’t fucking know how to regulate her emotions, she lets stress take over her.
She would love a narcowife, kind of woman who wears a lot of beachy dresses and have a shitty personality like her (like Kate del Castillo in La Reina del Sur or in Bad Boys, exactly that kind of narcowife) (I’m kinda projecting, sorry lol).
I can’t picture her with a sweet girl and I think a sweet girl wouldn’t be able to handle that woman.
She keeps arguing even though she realized she’s in the wrong.
She wouldn't be able to spend a lot of time with her S.O, she's such a workaholic.
I don't think she likes to wear men clothes.
I don't think she hates kids but I can't picture her with kids.
Wouldn't divorce once she's married.
Btw I didn’t want to make this too sexual bc lately this fandom is full of just that, too much smut, too much violence and rape in the smut and it’s so graphic that I feel I’m watching instead of reading wtf, its uncomfortable and I honestly can’t picture the characters being that violent and vile.
As I said in my previous hcs… these guys are surrounded by violence, stress and blood every day, I personally don’t think they wanna get home to torture their partners (well, maybe graves cause he is a piece of shit that mf. Okay kidding, not even Graves is that much of a bastard).
103 notes · View notes
Text
close to home | chapter four
close to home | chapter four
plot: Daryl and the reader get to know each other in the gray hours of the morning, and he needs to decide whether or not she's a good person and someone he can trust around his family.
series masterlist
Pairing: Eventual Daryl Dixon x f!reader Word Count: 2,530 Warnings: violence, blood A/N: thanks for reading!
Tumblr media
The rain had dulled into a softer downpour, and the thunder echoed in the distance. Still, you decided to fill every possible container with rainwater. You insisted it would be less work cause it wouldn’t have to be boiled. 
Daryl couldn’t exactly get a read on you. Anyone out here alone couldn’t be in the best mindset, and if you were telling the truth and you had been out by yourself since nearly the beginning, well, he couldn’t imagine the toll it had on someone. This world was hard enough without having to go at it alone. 
Despite that, you seemed decent enough. He didn’t believe you to be a threat, at least not while he was awake. And he couldn’t figure out why you didn’t shoot him back in the woods when he pulled the crossbow on you. He believed any sane person would’ve. But then again, he didn’t let the arrow fly either. 
The treehouse seemed okay enough, and he didn’t miss the stockpile of ammo in the room. You had quite a collection of ammo. You were just missing something to shoot it with. You had plenty of knives, though. Enough to gut someone ten times over. But you didn’t have one on you. You’d set it down. Did you trust him? Did you not care if you lived or died?
Waves of frustration rippled off him; the thunderstorm and walkers had ruined what was supposed to be a simple run. And hell, Rick wasn’t even supposed to have joined them. Not with Lori due in a few days, and the group barely has control over their cell block. They barely had enough food to keep them going, which was the only reason why they were out there in the first place. The food they got from the prisoners wouldn’t last them long, and they needed real meat. 
He looked up and glanced at where you were sitting. You’d moved over to the window and pulled back the makeshift curtain, the breeze flowing in. Each time the distant lightning cracked, he could make out the features of your face since you’d moved away from the fire. 
“You said you went to medical school?” Daryl asked you. 
It took a moment before you realized he’d even asked a question. “I did. I was about to start my residency. Why?”
He hesitated for a moment. “You know anything about delivering babies?”
This captured your full attention, and you looked away, “Why? You due soon?”
Daryl didn’t sense the sarcasm in your tone, “Ain’t for me. Got a friend. Due in a couple days.” 
You shook your head, “I don’t know much. Besides, you said you wouldn’t tell me about your group.”
Daryl snorted but didn’t say anything as he leaned back against the wall. Bringing her back, someone with medical training, that would be big. Hershel wouldn’t be alone, and you might know more about humans. Still, it’d be a risk. He didn’t know if it was worth perusing. They’d been okay with just Hershel…
“I have a group,” Daryl said, “There’s eleven of us. This is how this works. You tell me your story. Tell me who you are and what you’ve done. Maybe if everything’s good… maybe I bring you back with me.” 
You continued looking out the window, and Daryl started to think you hadn’t heard him cause the silence stretched so long. But finally, you turned to look at him, “Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why would you bring me back with you? You don’t know me….”
“You coulda shot me in the head, coulda left me to die in the woods. I mighta survived, I mighta. But you helped me. Even now, you sit with no weapons. You ain’t even lookin’ at me. I don’ think ya dangerous.” 
You smiled sadly, “No, I’m not dangerous.” 
“I tell ya what. You tell me what I wanna know. We pack this place up and go when the storm clears.” 
“You just want my supplies and medical help with that baby,”
Daryl shrugged, “Maybe. But ain’t that the way the world works now.”
Again, you were silent and you looked out the window for a few minutes. Finally, you took a deep breath and looked at him. “How about this. We tell each other what we both wanna know, and I decide if I wanna trust you.” 
Daryl nodded slowly, “Aight, that’s fair.”
***
The wall was cold against your skin, and the rainwater splashes made you shiver even more. The fire was dying, and the treehouse was growing darker. You slowly moved from your spot and put more logs on the fire. Then you went to grab an old can of peaches and gave Daryl another can of food too. 
“I was up in Atlanta when everything happened. Liam was one of those survivalists, always thinking about the end of the world. He wasn’t crazy about it. I mean, hell, he was right. But he knew things, and he knew how to take care of himself. So when the world went to shit, we got the hell out of Atlanta. He said that if there’s a cure, he will wait it out,
“So we took off, headed down south. His parents lived around here. They didn’t make it. But this treehouse was his. He and his dad built it years ago. It used to have stairs, but we knocked them down when a dead one got up on the porch. We fixed this place up together. I’ve been here since.” 
“Winter musta sucked,”
You laughed and nodded while taking another bite of your food. “It did. There’s no insulation. I got snowed in a few times. But Tora and I… we managed. It’s been just us since October, I think. I don’t know,”  You shook your head, “I had some family down here too, but I checked their place out, burnt down and overrun, just like every other shithole.”
“And before? Before all this?”
“Why does it even matter? I was just a normal person. I was in school, engaged, and living the dream in Atlanta. It doesn’t matter.”
Daryl nodded, “It’s easy to think that way,”
“Not sure there’s any other way to think,” You said, “So what about you? Your group, been together before?”
He shook his head, “No, we met each other on the road. We’ve lost a few people, gained a few people too. We’re holding up nice now if we can make it work. Our leader, Rick, and his wife are pregnant. Abouta pop. We have a man that can help, but I don’t know. I figured someone else might help too.”
You nodded and looked around the treehouse. This was a place you knew before and after. A place that you loved and hated. It was home and a prison, with memories that hurt every time you stepped in. And you were alone. And you were tired. 
“Your leader, Rick… will he take me?”
“He will. You helped me, you coulda killed me, and you didn’t. Plus, you got medical supplies and ammo. Our group needs both.”
You glanced at your stockpile. Your lifeline. Could you trade that? What if they took it and killed you right after?
Daryl seemed to sense your hesitation. “I could kill you right now if I wanted to. I coulda killed you too, back in the woods. Woulda been real easy to just pull the trigger. But I didn’t. I’m taking a leap of faith here, too, (Y/N).”
“Can Tora come?”
This made Daryl laugh, and he looked at the giant cat stretched out by the fire. “Yeah, yeah. We probably got a rat problem. We’ll keep her busy. Everyone pitches in. Besides, we got a kid. He’d probably love an animal around.”
You nodded and tossed the empty can aside. “I’m really familiar with the area. Been here before and after. You tell me where your camp is, and I bet I can get you there.”
“We at a prison,” 
Your eyebrows rose. “I know what one you’re talking about. About twenty miles north of here, right? Liam and I saw it a while back. It was full of walkers.”
“Not anymore.”
“Big group,” You said, your stomach tight with nerves. “If they kill me, promise me you’ll make sure Tora lives.”
The archer chuckled, “No one’s gonna kill ya.”
“I have a car. About two miles north of here is Liam’s parent's house. I keep some stuff there sometimes. If no one’s broken it, we can get to it once the storm clears and the sun’s up. I’m not walking twenty miles again.”
“Me neither,”
***
Sometime in the early morning, sleep found you. When your eyes opened a few hours later, the sun had been up for at least an hour. It took a few seconds before your memory came back to you and you jumped up, looking for the stranger from yesterday. 
The treehouse was empty, and your stockpile was gone. And so was Tora. “Son of a bitch,” You muttered, getting up. You grabbed your matchete and ran to the door. It was slightly ajar, and you nearly fell over when it opened so easily. 
“Jesus, you tryin’ wake everythin’ up around here?” Daryl stood by the balcony's edge, lowering the baskets with some rope. 
“I thought….”
“Yeah, I know what you thought, but I didn’,” Daryl said, “I was gonna wake ya up soon. Your cat brought a rabbit back.” He nodded his head behind you, and you looked back. It had already been gutted, cleaned, and cooked. You stood in disbelief for a second. 
“Oh… where is she?”
“On the roof,” 
You grabbed a few pieces of the tender meat and looked up to where she was gnawing on some bones. You couldn’t help but smile and shake your head at her. 
“Your bag, the one you dropped by the lake. Anything important?”
“It was just water. And some clothes. Everything else is damaged from the water.” You said, going back for a few more pieces. After yesterday, you were starving. 
“Good, didn’ wanna walk all the way back there,”
You nodded and took one last piece before disappearing back into the treehouse. It seemed Daryl had grabbed everything. Except on the table were a few of your personal belongings. Your gun, leg holster, ring, and a photograph of you and Liam together. Your still-wet shoes were on the floor next to the table. 
Taking a deep breath, you took a photograph from the frame and folded it, then put it in your back pocket. Your attached the hostler and then looked at the ring. It wasn’t anything crazy, but it was a beautiful ring. Still, it ached your heart, and you couldn’t bring yourself to put it on. It didn’t feel right. Liam was gone. You weren’t. And you needed to think of a future where you survived, not memories that would hold you back. 
After pressing a quick kiss to the ring, you laid it gently along the small fireplace’s mantle. It was newly built. It wasn’t there before. But now, the ring would sit in the treehouse where it belonged. Where it could stay forever with Liam’s spirit and memory. 
“You aight?”
You looked back at Daryl and nodded, “Yeah. Let’s go.”
“It’s been quiet this morning. I think the walkers followed the storm south. The cat doesn’t seem worried.” 
You nodded and walked past him. Everything you needed to bring was already on the ground. “I’ve been here almost a year. Kept me safe. It feels so final.” You said. 
“We goin’ someplace better. Don’ got the time to be all wishy-washy about it.” 
You chuckled at his bluntness and walked towards the rope. “Yeah, I know.” 
***
Carrying all your supplies was much more difficult, and the two miles seemed to stretch forever. Each of you had bags on your shoulders and were carrying boxes of supplies. But finally, the yellow house came into view, and you sighed with relief. 
You didn’t need to say anything, your reaction alone told Daryl you were there, and he felt relief too. When you approached the garage door, you looked through the glass window and banged a few times before opening it. 
“I’ve picked through the house a few times. There’s really nothing to take. Anything worth taking I already did,” You said, walking over to the boxes of old Christmas decorations and donation boxes that never made it out. 
Underneath a Christmas tree box were the keys to the white Jeep Wrangler, and you unlocked the car quickly. It only took another minute to get it loaded up. 
“We lost the soft top a while back, left it at a storage unit in Atlanta, if I’m being honest.” You said. Suddenly your eyes widened, “Hold on, I gotta get something from the house.” 
“I’ll come with ya,” Daryl said. 
You glanced towards Tora, who happily sniffed all the boxes and other crap around the garage. “I’ll only be a second; watch her.”
You disappeared into the house, banging on a few walls to ensure no dead ones were around. You and Liam had locked the house up pretty tight. Just as suspected, there was nothing. And you quickly grabbed what you were looking for. On your way back, you passed another few boxes of donations and paused. 
In the garage, Daryl was getting antsy. He checked the supplies and then rechecked them. He wanted to get on the road and get back to his people. He wanted to know if Rick, Glenn, and Maggie had made it. He didn’t wanna wait any longer. 
Just when he was about to go look for you, you walked through the door carrying a bag in your arm and a cat carrier in the other. 
“I don’t trust her not to jump out of the car,” You said, shoving the carrier in his arms. “And I got this. Figured they shouldn’t be wasted, and I didn’t know how many baby supplies you got. It’s just some clothes and a few toys. Nothing else, sadly.”
“Lori will love this,” Daryl said quietly, setting down the carrier and taking the box from you. “You might be her favorite person after this.”
You laughed as you grabbed Tora, earning a few hisses as you tried to put her in the carrier. It took two tries, but finally, she was sitting rather unhappily and a bit overstuffed. “It’s only for a little while, baby,” You said, putting the carrier in the back seat and strapping it in, all while ignoring the few hisses she gave in displeasure. 
“Here,” You said, tossing the keys to Daryl. “This way, your people don’t think I got you hostage or something,”
Daryl only nodded and opened up the garage door, taking a quick look around before climbing it. You were just buckling in when the car roared to life, and he took off.
438 notes · View notes
klaustozier · 1 year
Text
suckerpunch ; chishiya
SUMMARY: you and chishiya are the leaders of the two rival gangs that control the city, but, one night, when you see chishiya being unfairly harmed, you save him.
this is smut, be aware of what you read!
warnings: chishiya x fem!reader, you're a fucking badass, chishiya's older than you, enemies to fuck buddies, this was a request so here it is (i hope that what i did is okay to the person that asked for a hate fuck, cause i wanted to be a little more rough), drugs (only weed), degradation kink, chishiya has tattoos, choking, spanking
word count: 4,4k
english is not my first language, i'm sorry for any mistakes.
i hope you like it.
Tumblr media
Maybe you shouldn't be doing this, but there was no other option. You weren't going to leave him in the hospital, he was going to put him in jail and there was a certain balance in the city with the two gangs and you knew it, it wasn't worth destroying everything over a shitty new gang.
You and Chishiya were the leaders of the gangs that dominated the city's traffic and the two gangs left the city balanced, running normally and it was like that for so many years that it was already part of everyday life, but a third gang had begun to want to take over the city. You were trying to find them to destroy them, but you didn't have much information yet.
That night you were going to a convenience store to get some food when you saw three guys punching and kicking a fourth guy on the floor of an empty parking lot, you thought the fight was unfair and decided you were going to stop it, it got even more personal when you saw who it was the blonde guy on the floor, his face all bruised and bloody from the blows he had taken. You weren't going to let a random gang kill the enemy that was yours even more so in a fight like that.
So you killed the three of them and took Chishiya to your car. He wasn't easy to carry him, but you did it. You wouldn't share your city with people who enjoyed that kind of unfair fighting.
When you noticed you were sitting Chishiya on top of your toilet, inside your bathroom, inside your studio apartment. If there was no way to get Chishiya to a hospital and you didn't know how to contact his gang to get their leader, then you had to take care of him.
“Chishiya?”, you called softly, lightly slapping his face, who woke up startled, ready to punch whoever called him, but you wrapped your hand around his fist, “Calm down, calm down, I won't hurt you .”
Shuntaro's eyes widened and he looked around, "What do you think you're doing?"
“Can you calm down?”, you asked, letting go of his hand, opening the mirror cabinet over the sink to Chishiya’s left and taking out a heavy-duty first-aid kit you had (heavy-duty as it had a needle and thread to sew up wounds, if needed).
“Where am I?”
“Okay, let's go”, you placed the first-aid kit over the sink and opened it taking cotton, alcohol, gauze and plaster from inside and placed them on the sink, doing it while explaining: “I was going to buy…”, and you decided not to say what you were going to specify what you were doing, he didn't deserve to know, “something when I saw three people hitting one in an empty parking lot. I thought the fight was very unfair, it was three against one, the person on the ground was already unconscious and I considered stopping the fight, until I saw that you were the one on the ground and decided that I was definitely going to stop the fight.”
Chishiya listened in silence and watched as you soaked a cotton ball in alcohol, “But why did you save me? You could have let me die.”
You laughed, stood in front of the other and pulled his face up by the chin, still smirking, "If there's anyone in this town who's going to kill you, it's going to be me."
Chishiya's eyes widened a little. That statement was supposed to sound threatening, and it did, so why did he feel his stomach turn over and not with fear? His concluding thoughts were cut short when the alcohol swab touched his cut lip making him shift and move away from the swab.
“No, no, no”, you said holding him by the back of the head, “I'm going to have to clean these wounds so swallow your crying.”
Chishiya should have been offended, but once again his body reacted differently, maybe he hit his head or got hit too hard. What he didn't think about was how strange and different that was, they never had that dynamic, they had already met and talked several times, but it was a strange situation. They had never touched each other before. It felt like where your fingers touched him it burned his body.
You didn't feel different, being silent with the other and taking care of him was strange and you liked it. What your shouldn't, you were just taking care of the enemy that way so you could personally kill him in the future.
“Take off your shirt”, you asked.
Chishiya frowned at you, “Not even a wine? Not even a little vodka just to cheer me up?”
You rolled your eyes and laughed, "Fuck you, just take your fucking shirt off."
“So violent… Jesus, you sound like a criminal… like a gang member.”
“Shut up, Shuntaro, just do what I say.”
Chishiya laughed and pulled his shirt up, his torso hurted a little doing that, but it could be worse. There were some shallow cuts on his chest, that was where the blood on his shirt came from, but luckily nothing that needed sewing up. You just kept cleaning up, not wanting to pay too much attention to the bruised and tattooed chest.
“How did they get to you like that? Alone?”, you asked, trying not to pay attention to his body, it wasn't the moment to be attracted to Chishiya.
“I have a suspicion that someone from my gang told them where I was going”, Chishiya sucked in air between his teeth as alcohol fell into his chest wounds, “I didn't like one of them anyway, now I'm sure that he must have been in on it."
“And why did you let him join the gang if you didn’t like him?”
“He was already in the gang when I became a leader”, he explained, his face contorting as you cleaned his wounds.
“And how do you intend to take care of it? It is not good to have a snitch in the group.”
“First, I'm going to try to see if it really is him”, began the seated man and once again sucked in air between his teeth, “Maybe I should pretend to go somewhere alone and see if they show up again, so I can do some kind of ambush and destroy them all.”
“Would you like some help?”
"What? Do you want to help?"
"The enemy of my enemy is my friend, isn't it?", you shrugged, "And I don't like them, I like them less than I like you."
“Awwwn”, Chishiya placed his hand over his heart and pouted.
“Fuck off", you commanded laughing softly, “And they're messing with my business too, it doesn't hurt to get together and end this little game, there's already two people running the town and that's enough.”
"We can join forces then, princess", Chishiya nodded, "But it will be for a very short time, we'll settle that and each one will go to their corner."
“Deal, Shuntaro.”
You offered your hand and Chishiya shook it briefly, sealing the deal. After that, you continued to clean his wounds and soon started bandaging all the cuts. Silence reigned, the two thinking about many things that did not involve rivalry or what happened. They both thought the same thing, in fact, how attractive the other was. Perhaps all the adrenaline had them a little out of their minds.
“Are you going to put gauze on my wounds and choke me to death?”, asked Chishiya, breaking the silence, making you laugh.
“Not today”, you replied smiling, “You're hurt, it wouldn't be fair. If I ever plan to kill you, it will be a fair fight, with both of you well rested and fed, no firearms, just bladed weapons and our fists and whoever dies, dies.”
The blonde nodded, "And in that case, it's going to be me the one who dies, right?"
 You leaned towards his face, getting dangerously close and smirked, "Of course."
“What makes you so sure you'd win, kitten?”, Chishiya challenged, the twinkle in his eyes was making you extremely tempted.
“I'm clearly faster”, you said, smiling.
Chishiya laughed wryly, and quickly fell silent as you took the scissors from the firs-aid kit and pressed the sharp tip against the blonde's Adam's apple, who swallowed hard.
Chishiya's strong, beautiful hand wrapped around your wrist and pushed it away from his neck, "And I'm stronger", he said, you forced your hand back into place, but the older one was stronger anyway, even if he wasn't the best conditions to fight.
You tried to attack using your other hand, but your wrist was also grabbed and Chishiya joined both of his hands and held it using only one of your hands.
“Do you want to keep playing, princess?”, teased the oldest.
You laughed wryly, tried to move your wrists and were unsuccessful, "You're still going to get fuck for crossing my path, Chishiya."
“I honestly think you're the one who's going to get fucked over this, baby girl.”
And the two faced each other. Hearts racing, that kind of talk was releasing too much adrenaline to make them think straight. Your eyes dropped to Chishiya's pretty lips, who mimicked the movement, it wasn't something easy to resist. Neither of them noticed exactly when this had happened, but in a moment one advanced towards the other and they began to kiss.
There was so much anger in that kiss. Chishiya would sometimes let out low whimper of pain, because his still delicate cut lip was being crushed by your lips. Even though you didn't want to admit it, those whimpers were making you so fucking horny. Maybe they shouldn't do anything since Chishiya was hurt, but you were leaving it up to him to say he wanted to stop.
Chishiya finally released his grip and grabbed your thighs pulling you onto his lap and pinned you against the cold tile wall.
“You are so light”, mocked the older one.
“Shut up, motherfucker”, you said, rolling your eyes.
“Wow, you sound like a criminal”, mocked the other again.
You rolled your eyes, "Are you going to do something or are you going to hold me here on the wall and get degraded?"
"There should be fetishes just for that."
“Do you have a fetish with that by any chance?”
The blonde chuckled and clasped your thighs in his hands, “No… not like this anyway…”
Chishiya came out of the bathroom with you in his arms and walked to your bed, where he threw you on the mattress and got on top of you. When he went to try to kiss you again, you grabbed him with your legs and arms and spun you around on the bed, getting on top.
“Are you as strong as you think, Chishiya?”, you teased.
The blonde laughed and leaned on his right elbow while his left hand went to the back of your neck pulling you closer, "Yes, I am", he informed, returning to kiss you.
The hand on the back of your neck that caressed your hair slid to your throat and wrapped it gently at first, wanting to know if it was okay to do what he wanted to do. As there wasn't any kind of displeasure shown, he gently squeezed the sides of your neck, receiving a soft sigh in return.
Chishiya parted their lips and watched the scene for a little while. You took your hand to the other's wrist and held on to it as if you needed help to hold yourself together. Your face was contorted adorably and your lips pretty, red and glossy. Chishiya was so hot with the cuts and bruises, he was already beautiful, but this was another level of attractiveness.
Your hips slowly rocked against Shuntaro's hips, "Kiss me", you ordered through gritted teeth.
“How do you say?”, teased Chishiya, grinning.
“Now, you fucking piece of shit.”
Chishiya laughed and just accepted, how could he say no to that cutie? He let go of your neck, he had choked you enough (for now), the action made you whimper softly, "How cute."
“Shut up, Chishiya", you ordered angrily.
“Make me”, he teased once again.
“I still will punch you until you pass out…”
The older one laughed and the kiss resumed. Chishiya's hand was still on your neck, without squeezing, just caressing the skin with his thumb, it went down your chest, squeezing your breasts.
"Cute", Chishiya said when you moaned as your nipples were pinched over your shirt.
"Fuck you."
"You should be ashamed of yourself for rubbing that pussy on my lap and acting like you're better than me."
"Ah… but I am…"
The blonde smirked, "Fucking bitch."
Your shirt was taken off and Chishiya started sucking your nipples gently, not doing too much, not doing everything you wanted. He was doing it on purpose, he wanted to piss you off and he was succeeding. You wanted more, you wanted to be pinched and squeezed, but nothing came, making you groan.
“I hate you so much", you complained.
“Why?”, Chishiya was a bastard.
“I have little patience.”
The older one chuckled, "Then feel free to take control, baby girl."
You rolled your eyes and pushed him onto the bed. You leaned over to the night stand and picked up a joint and lighter from the top of it, putting the blunt in your mouth.
"Are you really going to smoke? Marijuana? With me here under you?", complained Chishiya pretending to be angry, "I'm going to call the police."
"Don't you ever shut up?", you asked, lighting your cigarette.
Chishiya laughed, he was enjoying making you angry, it was so funny. The fun ended when you sat on the other's legs and started to smoke, it wasn't fun anymore it was just hot.
"Do you want some?", you asked, showing the joint in your hands, noticing that he was very entertained watching you smoke.
Chishiya nodded, you took the joint to your lips again and smoked it taking your hand to his chin, he parted his lips waiting for what you would do. You blew the smoke to the blonde's lips and kissed him, brushing your tongue gently against his.
If it was up to Shuntaro, they would do that for hours. You repeated your act a few more times, smoking and sharing it with the older one with kisses.
"Fuck", cursed Chishiya softly making you laugh.
You returned the two objects to the bedside table and adjusted yourself, hugging Chishiya's neck, kissing him again, the kiss was less nervous now, but that didn't stop you from scratching the other's chest with your nails, being careful not to scratching at the cutted areas, making him moan softly as they kissed.
With a peck, you broke the kiss and pushed the blonde's body back onto the bed, running kisses down his chest, biting the skin from time to time, always being careful with the cuts, but always licking the bruises, because you loved to hear his adorable whimpers. With Chishiya's skin between your teeth, you proceeded to unfasten his belt, making him sigh in anticipation.
"I like you like this… quiet", you commented, licking where you had bitten, eliciting a low whine from him, "It suits you, Shuntaro."
"Fuck…", was the only thing he managed to say when your hand tightened on his cock over his pants.
"How cute", you smiled, "Is your cock so hard because of your enemy, Chishiya?", you laughed at the snort the older one let out, squeezing his still covered cock, "How do you explain that to your friends?"
"Go fuck yourself."
You adjusted yourself over Chishiya's body and took off his jeans, leaving him only in black underwear. Your beautiful lips wrapped around the man's cock over the cloth and licked, eliciting a breathless groan from him.
"Fucking shit", Chishiya cursed, throwing his head back, shuddering when the hot mouth wrapped around the head of his cock covered by the cloth, "Baby girl… don't do that…", he asked softly, looking down at you who was staring at him from under you lashes. Chishiya had dark eyes, the unreadable expression and the bruises on his face, it was all so sensual. Your tongue flattened against his cock, saliva marked the cloth leaving it glistening against the light, pre-cum also marked the tip, "Shit. You have to… you have…", he couldn't talk with you licking him like that, you could feel his blood boil as you felt the pulse against your tongue, so hard and fast.
"If I give you a proper blowjob, will you shut the fuck up?", you asked with an expression of boredom.
"I do not promise anything."
And Chishiya laughed when you rolled your eyes. You could complain, but you were too horny to be against what was going on, so you just removed Shuntaro's underwear and slid your hands down his thighs, his hard cock pulsing gently against his beautiful abdomen. You lay back down, taking his cock in your hands, making him sigh.
You licked the length of the thick cock and moaned softly feeling the pulse directly against your tongue. Chishiya purred and laid his head on the pillows, bringing his hand to your hair, stroking and squeezing the strands tightly as his cock sank completely into your mouth.
Your head began to slowly rise and fall, the rhythm gradually increasing as the other's moans became more desperate.
"Fuck, kitten", moaned Chishiya, he called you that to annoy you, but now it was exciting and you hated it.
One of his hands was in your hair, tightening the strands in his fists, and the other held his cock, helping you to swallow it.
The moan that came out of Chishiya's lips made your eyes roll back in pure pleasure. You moved your head up and down, he could feel saliva sliding down his cock to his thighs. He moaned louder as your delicate hands caressed his balls.
"Shit", growled Chishiya softly, stopping your movements, panting heavily, "Lie down on the bed now… go, come on", he ordered impatiently.
You did as asked, laying down on the bed. Chishiya got on top of you and lay down between your legs, "I should just fuck your pussy and leave, but I can't resist a pretty little pussy like that, all wet and just for me."
And Chishiya began to undress you quickly and began to suck you off, making you moan loudly, making you squirm. The fucker knew what he was doing, he seemed to know how your body worked, he licked just the right place and made the biggest mess, his mouth completely covered with your pleasure.
"Shut the fuck up", Chishiya swore, "The whole building will know you're being eaten."
"Shhh", you silenced, grabbing his long blonde hair and forcing him to go back to licking you, "use your mouth for something worthwhile."
Chishiya laughed, "Slut", his strong hand covered your mouth with ease, "I should gag you, but look how beautiful you look with my hand like that…", his other free hand went to your neck and caressed it gently, fingers enveloped in skin, "So pretty at my mercy, you should think about being like this more often."
"Shut the fuck up", you commanded in a voice muffled by the big hand on your mouth.
Chishiya laughed, taking his hand away from your mouth, "Unbearable bitch", he whispered.
The blonde tightened your neck and went back to eating you out, he thought it would be better to choke you than cover your mouth for now, it made your moans more sly and he liked that.
“Chishiya", you whimpered, rolling your hips, not really wanting to sound that desperate.
And that drew a wry chuckle from him, "Moaning like that? Because of the enemy, princess? What are you going to tell your friends?"
“Shh”, you hushed again, your hands going to the blonde hair and you forced it down once more.
Chishiya laughed and accepted, he ran his tongue up and down the wet pussy, sucking the clit and sank his skillful fingers inside you, loosening you. You moaned softly, your fingers caressed his hair gently, it wasn't your intention, but it felt so good that you thought Shuntaro deserved a reward. The older man's hand didn't stop its back and forth movements, opening you for him.
Chishiya pulled away, brought his thumb to your clit and stroked in circular motions, “I need to fuck you.”
"Please."
It was the first time that had been said that night and it was said so delicately.
Wasting no time, Chishiya grabbed you around the waist and flipped you over on the bed, lifting your hips, leaving you completely exposed for his own benefit.
"What a nice little pussy", said the blonde, observing your wet pussy, spreading your lips with his fingers, "It's already all loose."
“Don't you shut up-”, your sentence was cut off when he spanked your ass.
“What were you going to say, kitten?”, asked the older one ironically, giving you another slap.
You whimpered, “Just fuck me, Shuntaro.”
“Of course, all for you, my sweetie.”
“If I wasn't so horny, I swear I would-”, and a long moan left your lips as Chishiya thrust his cock inside you hard, without giving you time to adjust.
"You swear what, baby?", he asked, his face leaning over your.
"I swear I'd kill you right now, Shuntaro", you stated clutching the sheets as your pussy was fucked mercilessly.
"I think it's funny that you think you could kill me", Chishiya whispered, biting your earlobe.
Chishiya held your waist, thrusting hard, but the pace was still too slow for your liking, "Faster, you motherfucker."
"Of course…"
And he obeyed such a crude request, starting to speed up his movements. Your moans started to get louder and louder, you were too lost in your own pleasure to control yourself.
It wasn't so loud that it would disturb the neighbors in the apartments next door, but Chishiya still chuckled softly and put his hand over your mouth.
"You'll wake up the whole building like that", he warned softly, continuing to thrust.
You just whimpered and grabbed the sheets as you were harshly fucked. Chishiya's hand gripped your hip tightly, squeezing the skin in his fingers, you were sure it would get purple.
"You're so hot", growled the man softly, his lips close to your ear, you shivered with those words, "I think that me talking doesn't bother you anymore, huh?", his hand on your waist slid down your skin down to your ass and squeezed the flesh.
"I'm still going to destroy your entire gang and take care of the entire city by myself", you stated.
"Do you think you can do it, baby girl?"
"I already do that, only you pretend to do something and get in my way."
He straightened his posture and took both of your hands, bringing them behind your back, squeezing your wrists into one hand to keep them there. His free hand went back to squeezing your ass and began to slap the skin.
Neither of them had any sense of time anymore, at that moment, they only knew that they were very close to an orgasm and that they hated each other so fucking much.
“Chishiya”, you purred, “I'm going to cum…”
“Me too", Chishiya stated.
“I- AH!”, you were going to say something, however Chishiya's hand that remained resting on your ass, which was already hot and red with the countless spankings, went down to your pussy and started to masturbate you quickly.
You twisted your arms trying to free yourself, but the blonde man was much stronger than you. It didn't take long for a ragged moan to leave your lips and you came on Chishiya's cock.
The older one chuckled softly and pulled out of you, letting go of your wrists. Shuntaro sat on his legs and jerked off briefly, his free hand gripping your ass, squeezing hard as he reached his climax watching his cum fall over the red skin. When he finally came, he lay down beside you and sighed softly.
“You're not going to sleep here”, you said, making the other open his eyes wide.
Chishiya groaned and got up, "I'm not going to sleep in this shitty place", he informed you as he sat down.
You laughed, "If you say so, I could have sworn I saw you dreaming, and dreaming of me still."
“God have mercy on you", he said as he searched for his clothes, “I'm still going to break both your legs.”
“Why don’t you break it now?”
“Because I got beat up and I just came”, the comment made you laugh putting your hand under your head to support it and be able to observe the other, “I'm not in full mental faculties.”
“If you say so", you said as the other dressed, “I guess I'll have to find a new place to live.”
"I would never attack you in your home, but if it makes you feel safe, it's not a bad idea."
“Do you think it would be viable for us to unite?”, you asked, sitting on the bed after a while of silence, Chishiya crossed his arms, “This third gang can't keep thinking we're accepting their presence.”
“If you're willing, I am too”, the blonde was sincere, “It's better to unite against a common enemy, but that's all it will be, after we get what we want, it's each one to one side, correct, kitten?”
“I wouldn't dream of doing otherwise, Shuntaro.”
“Do you have any plans in mind?”
“I have, I can tell it to you later. Could you give me your phone number?”, you asked.
The eldest smirked, “Are you in love now, kitten?”, you rolled your eyes, “Do you want to send nudes on my personal phone?”
"You don't give a minute of peace, how can you compete with me?", you questioned, rubbing your forehead, "It's so we can talk, fucking piece of shit."
"Oh, yes, of course."
You groaned and threw your phone at Chishiya for him to add his contact, and when he were done, he threw the phone back to you, "Fuck you from the bottom of my heart, Chishiya, see you in hell."
“I’ll wait for you there, princess.”
And with that said, Chishiya unlocked the door and left. Leaving you alone and naked in your bed.
...
i hope you liked it!
please live a like and a comment!
tags: @just-trashs @alisujelly
if you have any requests, make sure to talk to me
see ya next time.
(´。• ᵕ •。`) ♡
♡masterlist♡
898 notes · View notes
alannybunnue · 1 year
Text
Ok, Imagine: The Targaryens as yanderes
Thank @missglaskin for this, i've been reading too much of their headcannons and i need to get this off my chest, so bear with me
T.W: The Targaryens(yes, considering how problematic and delusional they can be, they are a warning) Kidnapping, Pregnancy and Death by birth (Maybe even miscarriages, remember this is the medieval era x-x) probably mentions of SH/SA (Not gonna go into details about this) and maybe more (BE AWARE, THESE ARE MY 8AM THOUGHTS BEFORE COFFEE)
〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓
So imagine that the reader from the HOTD is not a kidnapped child from a unfortunate family. They are descendants from an kidnapped person (It's not any better, i know-)
1. Aegon I!Reader:
Now, Aegon the Conqueror, conquering all of Westeros until suddenly, he meets a person that he can't understand why at first, but he feels infatuated with this person, even more than with Rhaenys.
You could be a mere commoner or a lady from a small house. Either way, you are taken from your home never to be seen again. Maybe he convinced your family to give you away, maybe he burned them to ashes, we will never know.
And although they were completely against this at first, Visenya and Rhaenys grew to adore you and now they spend time with you a lot, wanting to protect you(mostly Visenya) and gain your affection(especially Rhaenys). Not that it bothers Aegon, he feels great to know that both of his wifes are on board, and you are terrified. The people who kidnapped you and took your life away, want to play "Happy Family" like they don't keep you locked 24/7 while they terrorize all of Westeros.
Maybe Aegon did married you, but i like to think that he didn't considering he has two wifes already. But he did got you pregnant (cuz of plot and stuff).
All the 3 adore your daughter (Yes, it's a girl, again, plot and stuff), she is the apple of their eyes, their little princess, and no one is gonna touch her.
Both Aenys and Maegor see you as their fourth parent, doing anything to gain your praise and affection, especially Aenys since Rhaenys passed when he was 3 years old, which causes you to be more motherly to him(Also because he is a sick baby boy-), consequently making Maegor jealous.
Speaking of Rhaenys' death, that made your and your daughter's incarceration worse, since Aegon's paranoia grew a lot more, wanting nothing but to protect his beloved and his sweet princess, Visenya was no help, she just indulged her brother's tendencies.
And may the Gods bless Dorne, cuz the attacks will be tripled now X-X.
Unfortunately, life sucks and you die due to a disease, leaving your daughter in the hands of insane Targaryens who become even more possessive over her.
〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓
2. Aenys/Maegor!Reader:
After your mother's death, your family turn their eyes to you, now as the only remark of their beloved, since you took most of her characteristics, in appearance and personality.
And don't come thinking that once you reach adulthood that you will be free, Aegon admitted that he was not gonna marry you off anytime soon, he just lost his beloved, he is not gonna lose his daughter too, and the entire family agrees. Although Visenya did offer to marry you to Maegor, your father didn't seen to believe that Maegor was a proper suitor for you(+ The Faith of the Seven was gonna go crazy on them, considering that you are half-siblings-) and Aenys was already married to Alyssa Velaryon at this point.
You enjoyed spending time with Alyssa and your nephews, it was a way to distract you from the rollercoaster that was your life. Because of that and the obsession being a part of their blood at this point, Aenys' kids tended to find confort in you even if you were not too far from eachother in age.
As for Maegor, well, unlike Aenys and his family who only felt platonic feelings, Maegor's feelings grew into a romantic and sexual obsession that at the time he could not fulfill and Visenya was not much of help either, she told him that one day, you two would be married. So imagine his anger when he was forced to marry Ceryse Hightower.
For a couple of years, your life started to finally take course, sure, you were still trapped and with no way of getting out of your family's view, but it was better than when your mother passed, at least you walk around...with at least 4 trusted guards taking care of your every move...
And then Aegon died.
After taking the Iron Throne, Aenys became even more needy of your affection and support due to the huge stress he was dealing thanks to the rebellions against him. You would stay by his side most of the time trying to give him the emotional support he needs. And boy, that infuriated Maegor a lot. Everyone is competition to him at this point, doesn't matter what feelings they have for you.
Maegor's relationship to you was another rollercoaster. As children, you were pretty clingy onto him since he is your older brother and Aenys was always sick or busy. As teens, he became more touchy with you, but had to cross limits after some time and stopped almost completely after marrying Ceryse. However that did not stopped him from making something clear, he wanted you, you would be his, and that frightened you.
Now, isn't suprising that he was married to Alys Harroway. To you, it was, Maegor was always adamant about you and him, so what changed? Maybe he needed to suppress his feelings and saw something in Alys that resembled you? Maybe you would never know, since he was exiled right after everyone discovered, and Aenys didn't even let him say goodbye to you. But the reason was obvious, only the Gods would know what Maegor would do to you if had the chance to see you one last time before going to Pentos.
The last years of Aenys reign was stressful and agonizing, not just because of the rebellions. Because of Aenys' disease that made you stay and take care of him, you tried to stay around his children to find confort on each other. Visenya would also try to confort you as your stepmother, and help you take care of Aenys. But at end, when you thought that he was getting better, Aenys passed away.
And you barely had any time to mourn the loss of you half-brother, cuz after the funeral, Visenya leaves on Vaghar to return with Maegor. You could only watch as your stepmother was crowning your half-brother in your nephew's place and the decapitation of Grand Maester Gawen. Not too long after, Maegor marries you in a Valyrian Ceremony.
And you spend the rest of the night in your shared chambers with Maegor reminding you who you belonged to, with his words haunting your every thought.
Then everything went downhill, you were locked away from the world, Maegor was the only one you saw, sometimes maybe Visenya. No one could get in your chambers except the servants when you needed something, but they wouldn't say much out of fear.
You had no chances of escaping, even when Maegor went into coma, you had to watch over him, take care of him. Since that was your duty as his wife and Queen.
You never met Alys Harroway or Tyanna, you only saw them once: When Maegor executed them both, his way of teaching you what could happen if you disobeyed him.
Since you couldn't leave, you never discovered what Maegor actually did or how many did he killed, but you knew that he was no good king. You only worried for you sister in law and your nephews, that Maegor forbidden you from meeting.
Only when he married Rhaena, is when you had a brief chance to know what happened to the rest of the family, how he killed Aegon and Viserys, how Alyssa had to run away with Jaehaerys and Alyssane, and also 'met' her daughters with Aegon, Aerea and Rhaella. Rhaena did spared you the details of the atrocities that your husband did, you had heard and seen enough.
For years, Maegor tried to have an heir, specially with you, mostly with you, but you never got pregnant, had many miscarriages and you never understood why. Until you did.
That pregnancy was hell, in shorts, but you tried to go through with it. But nothing works out for you and unfortunately, you didn't make it.
When Maegor heard the news that you didn't survive, his only question was about the child, not gonna lie, he was devastated over your death, but he needed to know what killed you...and it was a girl.
You had a daughter, which made easier for Maegor to simply want her dead, after all, he needed a son for a heir. But when he demanded the child to be brought to him, the baby was no where to be found. Since Rhaena had took her away.
Your daughter would live without knowing who her father nor her mother was, but surely, she would have a life better than yours.
And that's all that matters, right?
〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓〓
A/N: I guess this is it, i don't have the mentality to continue now, so if you want more, let me know...ok bye
1K notes · View notes