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michael-after-hours · 1 year

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First Time for Everything

Summary: Ace Merrill isn't unlike everyone else in aspects of he's always had a first time for everything in his life, even if he tries so hard to deny he ever had a first experience with anything.

His most recent and jarring experience is with Richard 'Eyeball' Chambers, his best friend and the real leader of their little gang.

Warning: mentions of past child abuse and child neglect, underage drinking and smoking(it's stand by me we should know these fellas aren't quite adults yet) homophobic language (it's like the 50s), Ace being a typical asshole, mental breakdowns. Mentions of self-harm, and mentions of losing a loved one. Child abuse, bullying, it... it's ace merrill...he can only be oh-so nice.

Notes: I just think they're kinda fruity✨

Ace Merrill always had his issues, his ups and downs, highs and lows in life. While contradictory to what he spews and boast, he's fallen on his ass screaming and crying for help more times than he has tripped and walked it off.

Ace was only five years old when he was back handed by his father for "Being too loud". He still feels the sting of it, how he fell to the ground and a ways away from his father.

He remembers his mother rushing to pick him up and scolding his father only for her to get back handed as well and take Ace with her to his bedroom. That was the first time he was ever back handed.

Ace was only eight when he was picked up by his pants and nap of his shirt, then chunked into the water by an older cousin.

He couldn't swim yet and was trying to teach himself to fish while at a lake house of a relatives for the thanksgiving holidays. Screaming and crying, wailing gasping on water.

He went under three times and only came up a fourth time after an Uncle jumped in to get him. He was eight the first time he nearly drowned, and thankfully the last time.

Ace was ten when he was left at school alone for three hours. His mother was in the hospital due to sickness, and his father off too drunk to remember to pick him up.

He told the ladies at the front office someone was coming to get him, and he didn't need to ride the bus home...only to walk the long long walk home.

It was a crisp autumn evening, the sun vanishing quickly and the walk to his house had no lights and he didn't have anything to ride home on.

Hot wet tears stained his face that day he dragged himself home, scared, alone and hungry and let himself in the house that was left abandoned for the night. He was ten the firs time that happened, but it wouldn't be the last.

Ace was thirteen when he was offered a ride home during winter.

A boy named Richard Chambers, a smile that was so warm it could've melted the snow, and a laugh so intoxicating it made Ace smile.

He rode a little bicycle, ruby red, an "Early Christmas gift" from his relatives down south who couldn't make the trip this year for him. It has room for someone to stand on the back.

"I normally take my little brother home, but he went home with some friends, and you live near me!" He happily told him.

Ace gladly accepted the offer and held on tight to Richard as they went up and down the large hills. Ace basked in how it felt like they were gliding, flying down the long stretches of hills and oh how he and Richard laughed and ran out of breath when they got to Ace's house. He was thirteen when he made his first ever friend.

Ace was fifteen when he experienced his first major loss in life. His mother passed away from her illness.

Ace didn't actually know what she passed away from, none of them really did. She would get more clumsy and forgetful, pass out more and more, nearly caught the house on fire....

The doctors said it was a stress induced illness. so ace took it upon himself to help her more. he learned to cook, clean, do laundry, wash dishes properly, how to keep the house tidy, and do his school work, and have dinner done in time for his lousy father to get home.

The stress free environment was never stress free however, since his father loved using him and his Mother as his punching bags after a bad day, and everyday was a bad day to that man.Ace swears he put his mother in an early grave, and he was fifteen when he lost the only person to ever protect him, he was fifteen when he vowed to hurt his father for taking away his mother. It was the first time he ever lost someone he truly loved.

Ace was fifteen when Richard joined him at the funeral. It was spring and beautiful, the perfect time for his mother to pass. "You said she always did love spring, now she'll be immortalized in it." Richard told Ace.

"What do you mean?" he croaked out, voice weak from the crying he'd been doing for the past week.

"On you know, every time you think of her, you'll think of spring, and how beautiful it is, and how nice the flowers are....That's what I do when I think of my aunt, the flowers of spring on her grave.." Richard always had a way with words, and the words made Ace cry again, and just as the fresh tears fell from his face and a sob broke out of his mouth and echoed in the still silence of the funeral, you could hear thunder and the sound of rain starting to pour down on the church while Ace wailed his heart out for his Mother. The stormy gloomy weather matching his mood. It was the first time he felt a hole in his heart and wailed until he couldn't talk.

Ace was sixteen when he learned how to replace a razor blade on his shaving razors. Ace learned quick how sharp they are and how you have to be careful with them, or how you can easily hurt yourself by accident on them. He learned that pants covered up bruises and cuts, and during the winter months when he dawns long sleeves for warmth no one questions it.

Ace learned that the thighs were the best and easiest place to cut, and how to pinch the skin. He learned having a scolding hot shower or bath that turned him a pretty pink made him bleed more. He learned the relaxation that would come with hurting himself. He was seventeen when he hurt himself to feel a litlte something. It was the first but not the last time he hurt himself on purpose.

Ace was seventeen when he felt the world collapse beneath him. He was told to get his shit together or it was off to the military with him by his Father's wrathful hands.

He discovered the joys of drinking, and smoking not just a month earlier, along with the joy of cutting and stabbing. He was seventeen when his father broke a bottle over his head and pushed Ace out of the house.

He was seventeen when his father pushed him out of a moving car at night and made Ace limp home.

He was seventeen when Richard found him....crying by the lake, and offered him his hand and a shoulder to cry on.

Ace was seventeen when his father skipped town suddenly, leaving Ace to live home alone, and with his uncle....who ran the junkyard. He was seventeen when he stabbed someone, and did a damn good job of hiding the body.

It was the first time he killed someone, and hopefully the last.

Ace was Eighteen when life got better again. Richard had formed a gang, or as he called it "A group of the local outcast Ace" and outcast they were.

Drinking, stealing, threatening, vandalizing, raising hell and smoking a pack a day nearly. They all got names that weren't their own. Ace was no one, he was John Merrill, but now? Now he was Ace...

He was special, everyone wanted an Ace for a full deck of cards, people would love and adore Ace. He was Ace Merrill, and he kicked Richard off the pedestal of leader and appointed himself the new leader, calling Richar, "Eyeball". Why? His eyes did this adorable twitch, that made Ace chuckle every time he watched his eyes wiffle and droop, twitch and make him shake his head.

He was eighteen when the cobra gang formed. It was the first time he felt alive.

Ace was eighteen again when he got a girlfriend. She only lasted about a month? Maybe two...Ace kept her around as eye candy, she was some cheerleader chick the guys bragged about who gave good favors in return for cigarettes and booz.

She was hung up on Ace like he hung the moon itself but he couldn't stand her in his lap. Or how she giggled, he hated her, she filled him with a blind rage so much so he back handed her in front of everyone one night. Screaming at her to "SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!!" Well she didn't like that and broke up with him, and none of the guys really agreed with it. He didn't care he brushed it off.....

Until Richard pointed it out. "Ace...hey man....your acting like my dad..." His dad, Mr Fucking Chambers....no better than Ace's now dead and gone dad. Ace thinks thats the first time he really truly felt bad for hurting someone, if only due to it concerned tone from Richard.

Ace was on his seventh bottle of beer and nearly done with his pack of cigarettes when he realized how shaky he felt. How he couldn't breath, how the world spinning and seemed loud around him.

How his skin felt tight and how nothing felt like he was really there and living.

The cold air of autumn felt colder than before but welcoming, and he felt hot and sweaty, he fell off the porch steps he was on and stumbled around aimlessly before falling to his knees, unaware and oblivious to his surroundings. Ace could feel himself breathing heavy as his heart pounded in his ears before he felt like he was puking out sobs with how they didn't want to come out.

Gagging and choking on them before he wailed and screamed. He still doesn't know why just that he had clawed at his arms so badly they were red and a few spots bloodied. He remembers the coldness of that night and then the warmth and reassurance of being rocked and soothed. He couldn't breath until later and apologized profusely. It was his first, and not his last breakdown.

It wasn't until the cold harsh winter that would cover the ground in snow rolled around that Ace had to dial a lot of things back and realize a few things. He and the boys....

Didn't ever do anything during winter. Spring thought mid Autumn was their peak rebellion time, of being horrible. Winter? No one wanted to get to wild, they drank more and smoked more, flirted more and went out to diners and stole a bit more on occasion, but mostly it was a "Buckle down for school" time sadly.

Ace...ace wasn't doing good in school. How bad was it? .....He was getting by with the skin of his teeth levels bad. So here he was at the kitchen table, getting tutored from Richard in math and biology.

"So you have reading down, and spelling, history is perfect...Hey you should do that!" Richard was going through the study rubric of what all Ace was good with, so far he sucked ass with math and biology. "Do what?" Ace spoke dryly as he got up for a beer, popping the cap off as it fell onto the counter with a little tink sound.

"Go do something with history! You love the stuff, even when Mrs Johnson says your being a lazy screw off you pop off to her the right stuff! Stuff we never even know about!" Richard had that beautiful warm smile that got Ace to crack a small one before slumping in his chair.

It was the first time he considered life outside of Castlerock.

Winter break rolled around, and ace Somehow passed midterms of "See what you know" with flying colours except in math. His biology improved! But...math still suffered severely he didn't care much though. "So why are you so good with history and reading anyways Ace? Of all the things, i'd always expect you to be bad at those...no offence."

Richard always spoke the truth when it was just the two of them, and while they were once again at Ace's house, this time he was making homemade hot chocolate, yes homemade hot chocolate, for the two of them, it felt...odd. "Hmm? Oh uhhh...mom, she always...She always read big books to me, and would hold me as we listened to those radio dramas you know.." He vaguely explained as he stirred the pot holding the warm coco.

"You never talk about her...she was so sweet, why dont you talk about her Ace?" Richard seemed genuinely curious, and Ace couldn't fault him nor blame him for that. He didn't say anything just poured the hot coco into two mugs for them both, it wasn't until after he poured them he realized it was the quote on quote 'wedding' mugs his mom got for her and his father, back when they were happily married that is.

It was just matching mugs, Something with flowers...If you placed the mugs just so, next to each other it would make a cute heart.

"I just...She was...I just don't like living in the past." He stated. "You barely live in the now Ace...it doesn't hurt to talk about the past I mean..don't you ever wonder where your dad is?" Ace snapped, he didn't even mean to he just did. "HE'S IN THE GROUND WHERE HE BELONGS!" A loud bang on the table, shaking it as some coco swirled, then spilled over the sides, and a choked gasping cry left him as he covered his mouth shaking.

"...John....Hey...I'm sure that's true but...It's okay, he deserves it...come here." Ace wasn't budging and so Richard pulled the chair to him, the sound echoed in the house as it skid across the hardwood floors, and stopped when he was thigh to thigh with Richard. It was the first time he talked about his past, but not the last.

on one of them..his first one, the rest he neglected, or shoved off and away until they left him.

"Yeah im gonna get heeaaad~!!!" This made both of the boys burst into side holding laughter. Barely able to contain themselves from such a shit joke about getting head from some chick. "Okey, okey, really tho...like making out...you gonna kiss her?" Ace got slightly serious after their fit of laughter.

"....Ace I don't know how to kiss a girl.." This took Ace aback. He always thought Richard was more of a ladies man...least he saw him as such. He was handsome, sweet, a bit of well a dick at times but that added to his charm Ace felt. "Oh...that's okey, I haven't either." He foolishly confessed to him.

"You've had more girlfriends than me and haven't even kissed one!! HA! Fucking fairy!" Richard was laughing hysterically again as tears pricked the corners of his eyes. "Hey! Your one to talk! Least I've had some! You barely got the town whore to kiss your cheek! Fucking Jennett McNEeeeerrrr that CUNT what a biitch.." This earned Ace the pleasant sound of Richard wheezing from laughter, and Ace was going him soon after.

"FUuuck mee! Oh Ace...fuck man, uggh...okey...I have an idea though...why not practice on eachother?" Ace burst into more fits of laughter until his eyes fully fell on Richard who seemed dead serious and had that sly grin on his face.

"...Really? Thats faggy.." He stated taking another swig from his bottle. "Yeah, and? You wanna be good at kissing girls? What are you a pansy?" Without a moment's notice Ace took another swig of his drink and launched himself at Richard.

Half on him, half off, hands cupping his face as he pulled him towards him and littered sloppy breathless kisses all over his lips. Richard joined quickly as he dropped his bottle and pushed Ace on the grass cupping the blond's face as he moaned and whined into the kiss. It went on for what felt like hours but it quickly died when they pulled away for air. "You taste really good..." Richard breathed out. "Yeah you too..." Ace returned to him, panting and realizing they had a lot saliva over their lips and face. Seems they were a bit messy with this whole kissing thing.

"Wanna go again?" Richard barely had time to gather himself before Ace was back ontop him kissing him deeply and letting a few giggles escape them both as they started tussling on the grass.

It was a month til Summer, and just four days before Graduation. Ace was sitting in the Principles office, leg bouncing up and down as his right hand covered his mouth, the other held a death grip on his bag.

Something about his grades and passing, he was terrified. He didnt want to be held back again, he dididn'tant to be alone again, he dididn'tant to deal with any of them at all.

"Merrill John? Come here now please" Oh he felt sick, he could feel his lunch wanting to come out the way it went down. He felt sweaty yet was freezing to death, his heart was pounding, and his breaths were severely uneven.

"So John, take a seat," He fell into the chair in the small office. Looking around seeing normal things. Books, files, couple plants, small trinkets, normal office no different than the counsellors. "So You have been doing wonderful in History, as well as English which is good! Your Science/biology has greatly improved to where your passing.....now your math." Oh god.

Oh god no, not the math, it cant be that of all fucking things, MATH!? That will be his downfall he SWEARS! MATH! OF ALL THINGS!!!

"It's still quite low, but the good news is-" He didnt hear the Principle, he already dropped his bag and pulled the trashcan that was in his office to vomit into. Gagging a few time before his lunch came up.

"Christ almighty Merrill! Now! Do you need the nurse before we continue? John! God son calm down, your not failing!! You passed math! The grading period is done! You passed!! Your extra curricular dont count towards graduating calm down!!! Go To the nurse! Take the can with you!!" Ace gave an extremely weak nod before puking again, he couldn't help it sadly. All this stress, all this anxiety and worry came out in the form of him sweating and puking, better than crying and weeping he supposed.

He did get to lay down for a bit in the Nurse's office with an ice pack, so that was nice, and Richard took him out as congratulations for passing math finally.

"Took you til graduation but hey! You made it!!"

He did..he did make it didnt he?

Graduation went as well as anyone could have predicted. Which was shockingly well! Ace wasn't even the trouble maker there! It was some other guy named Adam....who thought it would be funny to steal a few awards and hide them, making everyone sit around for an extra hour.

Ace and Richard didnt mind, sneaking close to eachother to talk and make fun of everyone, already reminiscing about thier prom that they barely attended, and what all they would be doing after graduating.

"thinking about getting a job out of town maybe...or in town and moving one day." Richard told him. "Yeah? sounds good...sounds good..." Ace told him. "What about you Ace?" "Hmmm? Oh uhh...I dont know...maybe work at the mechanics shop for a bit...." He wanted to go with Richard, where he went he wanted to follow, where he would go he wanted to be there with him. Where Richard went he wanted to be there home, to welcome him, or vise vera.

"Im gonna miss our study days.." Ace weakly confessed. "Dont have to! Might go to college and we can help eachother!" Collage...he forgot all about that, college...oh what would he do with College? What would he go to school for.. "Heh..yeah college..yeah...." the conversation ended quickly after as everyone was ushered into the Gymnazium where graduation was being held.

Richard passed with a very high score, all things considered, and Ace passed with an Honors in history and english...

He passed with honours in two of his classes...

The summer was hot as always, even when it was heading back into fall, but while speeding down a strip of the well known and worn path of Castlerock, hte Cobra gang was once again rasing hell for one last time, yelling, screaming, causing hell for one last time.

Why the last time? Well Ace was starting work soon, as was Richard, and they found a college the next town over, offered dormitories, and thier work would be in that town. So this was the last time to raise hell before making the long drives to work and start college.

The summer was full of swimming, fun, fights, more theft, and of course, Richard and Ace being together constantly. That brat of Richard's brother even joined them a few times.

As the day was winding down to a final end, and everyone was dropped off, Richard stuck with Ace walking with him to his house. "So...You wanna admit it?" He asked out of the blue. "Admit what?" Ace sounded confused as he said this. "Admit that your a homo, a fairy like my brother teased you about~" Ace could deal with meny meny things, but Richard getting that chim in his voice? He couldn't ever deal with it. "NO! Im not!! Fucking door won't open!" Ace always fumbled whenever Richard made him flustered, he couldn't help it the guy had him wrapped around him like string.

"Come onnn~ Admit it Acey!" He leaned against the door nearly pinning Ace against the door as he gave him a quick little kiss.

"Im not!!" Ace finally got the door open and rushed inside with Richard following closely behind. "I think you are! We always make out! Kiss! I know you've gotten off to me and well come on what guys moan each others names and give each other hand jobs Ace!?!" Richard had a very valid point to all that..

"Its not! Its! Its not! Not!!! Its only faggy if you fuck another guy!!" Ace was red now. "Oh so you giving me head in the car at lovers peak doesn't mean anything~" Oh he had a point.. "NO! IT! No it doesn't!! You have to...to penetrate them...you know...like with girls.." Ace told him.

"Well i mean...we got time, got all night, next week we start getting ready for collage~ dont see why not...Come onnn John!!" Ace didnt sya anything he just stared at a spot on the floor while leaning up against the wall. He wasn't expecting this tonight.

"I dont know..." He softly spoke out. "I'll be gentle! i wont hurt you!" "Yeah but we dont even know how to do that! Why do you think we've stuck with hand jobs! And Whos gonna penetrate who Dick!" Ace was yelling and more scared and anxious than anything, "How about I take care of you on the bed doll~" "NO! Not tonight no!! fucking goddamn whisky always makes you a horndog!" It didnt take Ace long to march upstairs to his room.

"There's a first for eveything you know Richard..." Ace sighed out and laid by Richard. Both glowing in the aftermath of thier orgasms, thier first, penetrate orgasm at that. "Yeah...yeah there is....fuck..." Ace recovered fairly fast from his orgasm, and was smoking, while Richard laid our catching his breath. "What do you mena theres a first for eveything?" Richard asked him. "Oh you know....first time to fall, first time to hurt yourself, first time to....lose someone..first time to...smoke, to drink, to nearly drown, to kill, to...to everything." He had a sour taste in his mouth suddenly. "First time to love~ First time to fall in love and last time, first time to kiss the most handsome guy in all of Castlerock, first time to moan your name and you mine, first time to go on a date, first time to cuddle~" Richard was curling up on Ace dragging him down to get him to go to bed with him and put his cigarette out.

Ace gave in and put it out before cosying up against Richard in the bed.

There really was a first for everything wasn't there?

#stand by me #ace merrill #stand by me fanfic #ace merrill fanfic #fic #ace x eyeballs #ace x richard #i dont remember their weirdly cutesy shipname....#not beta read at alllll #kiefer fans come get yalls JUICE #kiefer sutherland #i want this fic SEEN DAMNIT #fact! ace merrils name is john...and he was only 16 when he tormented the bkys in the film!! i had lkts to do and go off of✨️✨️

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