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hotchfiles · 5 months

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divine rush.

⋅☆⋅ mrsaluado's first xmas event ⋅☆⋅ masterlist

pairing: sirius x fem!reader.

summary: sirius is just very very nervous to meet your parents.

content warnings: maybe underage drinking lol but just fluff

word count: 1,4k

"oh my, you do not look well, pads." that was probably not the best way you greet your boyfriend as soon as you open the door to your home, but it got you by surprise how red and sweaty he looked, he wasn't the type to get sick and he looked absolutely feverish. "are you alright?" you touched his forehead with the back of your hand terribly worried about the boy in front of you.

"i'm fine! just... nervous." sirius replied, his teeth clenched as his eyes traveled to the room behind you. so that was it. you smiled back at him, holding his hand to finally pull him into your house, to meet your parents for the first time.

"you're quite charming, nothing to worry, babe."

"don't think being a good kisser's gonna work on your old man." you laughed out loud but you weren't sure he was actually trying to be funny, his eyes still roaming around your parents' house.

it was a decent middle class family house, not nearly as big as his own, or even the potter's one, where he had been living for the past year. still, it reminded him of his best mate's home in the best way possible: it felt like home. your little cousins were running around, no one telling them it was impolite to do that. most of your family were casually dressed and had christmas hats with the family's last name embroidered.

it was easy to see why you were so loving and understanding and for a second he envied you, the same way he envied james. he had spent so many years feeling like christmas was just a day family got together to make their highest efforts to look and seem better, more successful and richer than the others. worrying if his clothes were alright or if his mum was going to yell at him for it. arrogance was really the only things uniting his family and for a while he thought that was how it was for everyone.

"dad's been doing literal shots of spiked eggnogg, you could try the kissing." that finally got his attention back to you, a boyish grin taking over his beautiful face, following up with the quickest of kisses, his lips barely touching yours.

you nodded and were about to take him to the kitchen to meet everyone, especially your mum and dad, but your mother was quick to notice you both were taking a while at the door, going to you to see if everything was alright.

"merlin, aren't you dashing?" was her literal first words to sirius, excited her daughter had been dating such a beautiful boy, "where's the tattoos?" he was confused for a moment, his arms covered up with his coat, but he gave his hands so your mum could see it, his eyes looking straight at you trying hard to understand what was going on, you simply shrugged, like you had no idea and no involvment in that.

of course you did, you had mentioned to your parents he had quite a few and that he probably would be nervous about it so your mother thought the best way to make him ease up was just to put him on the spot immediately. good intentions, not the best execution.

still, he was getting less nervous by the second, your mother was a blabber mouth, she could talk with a rock, it felt you blinked for a second and she was already pushing him to the kitchen, taking one of the red embroidered christmas hats and fitting it on his head just before she herself introduced the boy to her sisters, who also had no problem showering him with compliments, you followed close behind, trying to hold in how amused you were and when you got to your dad, your mum went to his side, waiting for you to do your part.

"this is sirius, dad, sirius black, the boyfriend i've been telling you about." the fact you talked about him to your parents seemingly so many times had him die and come back mentally about three times before offering his hand so your dad could shake.

your dad gladly did, again, asking him all sorts of questions, about his tattoos, about motorbikes and music and what kind of food did he like. all questions about him and him only, not about his family, not about his blood, not about his name nor money. just him, what he liked, what hogwarts classes was he good at, what quidditch team did he support.

all training he had done as a child on how to behave correctly at family parties showed completely useless as the men of your family fought about who was going to win the quidditch world cup and the women tried to secretly talk about their sex life to one another but were all a bit tipsy on wine to really notice how loud they were.

your dad even offered you both eggnogg, and before any of you could drink it, he got a bottle of firewhisky, already half empty, and added barely a shot to each, his finger going over his lips asking for secrecy, but your mother obviously noticed it. "you're not trying to get the boy drunk, are you?"

"sweetums, let the kids have some fun, it's christmas!" he argued, knowing very well the amount of alcohol he had added wasn't going to do much but that it would be enough for him to create a cool father-in-law image.

you were in heaven, every time you felt sirius' hand brush on yours softly, showing you he was fine as he talked so happily to your family you felt your heart getting fuller and fuller of love for him. at the end of the night his coat was nowhere to be seen, he had leftover containers to take back to the potters and his arms were very very colorful after he decided to let your cousins paint his tattoos.

your parents offered the guest room so he wouldn't have to leave, although he would have to share it with other family guests, but he didn't want to impose so much just yet.

and when it was only the both of you, before he left, sirius took you in the most passionate and grateful of kisses. "i want this for us, doll face, so much."

"what do you mean?" you looked up at him confused, your arms over his shoulders.

"family... this freedom, kids running around, spiking the boyfriend's eggnogg... i hope we get to where your parents are." you could try to hold your emotions, you could try not to cry, but you knew it would be impossible, so you just let your eyes water and put your head on his chest.

you hoped so too, and hearing him say those things gave you a sense of certainty that one day it would be you both having your kid's partner over for christmas, and that thought on its own made that night one of the best of your life up to now.

#lari writes xmas #lari writes sometimes #marauders x reader #sirius x you #sirius x reader #sirius x y/n #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black x y/n #sirius black imagine #sirius black scenario #still working on his fancast i just know it aint ben barnes

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absolutebl · 11 months

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Hi there! I've just returned from a two-week holiday (as I'm writing this I'm actually still driving back home, but I want to get on top of it lmao), so I would like to defer to your knowledge:

could you pretty please provide me with an update on what series ended/started while I was away? I have a vague idea, but I don't want to miss out on the things that didn't get as much promo and are therefore not on my mdl.

if you can, my watchlist will be forever thankful!!

July Report: BL that Stopped & Started & Is worth Your time

Ended July 2023

Step By Step

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one.

This was an office romance between stern boss and sweet subordinate that felt more authentic to an office environment than previous Thai BLs of this ilk. And that authenticity added tension to the narrative and character development (how novel). Now that might be because it has western source material, or it might be because it is actually kind of old-fashioned (it’s been years since I worked as an office grunt). I also really enjoyed the brothers’ relationship, and kinda wished they hadn’t attempted (and failed) to give said brother his own side BL. That one flaw made it a 9/10 for me.

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

La Pluie

This BL takes to task the fated mates trope and what it means to have love chained intimately to predestination. It’s about how faith in destiny before choice diminishes the authenticity of emotion, relationships, and connection. This is a high concept to examine through the lens of a BL.

By activating + examining the soulmates trope this show is challenging a foundation of romance: the idea that there is one person meant to be your one romantic partner all your life. This means that we, as viewers, spend much of the show worried about it having a happy ending, and that’s the source of both its brilliance and tension: would the narrative have the strength to truly challenge its own romantic core? But, ultimately, all this elevated complexity was executed in a somewhat shaky manner with the narrative derailing into some serious pacing issues and characters manipulated by miscommunication.

However, with good chemistry and decent acting all around, plus some excellent high heat and representation of consent and a few other rare tropes, this one has to (like it’s sibling show My Ride) earn a 9/10. I enjoyed it even as it made me think, so despite its flaws:

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Started July 2023 & Looking GOOD

Jun & Jun

Korea Thurs Viki 8 eps

THANK YOU BL GODS. It is so good. Like everything I want in the world. I’m incandescently happy with this show.

It’s office set,

it’s an ex idol,

everyone is pretty as peaches,

and it’s all about remembering somebody’s smell!

I could not be more delighted.

Laws of Attraction

Thai Sat iQIYI 8 eps

(Icky picked it up but they are serving it in a complicated way that may require a VPN.)

Stars the pair from To Sir With Love with the same production team. IT’S SO GOOD. A morally corrupted trickster lawyer with a tragic past, sad eyes, and a beautiful smile that he uses like a weapon. Meets paladin martial arts instructor from other side of the tracks (who is out, at least to his baby sister).

Corrupt police.

Spoiled rich kid evil.

Ambitious politician.

Tragic death.

Terrible subs.*

This show is very like Manner of Death but so far it is a much better/tighter story (there's a Devil Judge aura happening). It’s NOT BL but it is fucking phenomenal. And you should watch it. Not wait to binge it. WATCH IT.

On a global scale this might be the best thing currently airing featuring gay romantic leads. Its really fucking good. It’s Lawless Lawyer but more complex character motivation and gay af. Fuck yes please and thank you. FINALLY.

Triggers for violence, beatings, death & torture depicted on screen. Like MoD they are not holding back.

(* A lot of the familial names they are using are not gendered in Thai but translated as such, like “nephew”. This one is gonna go down a lot easier if you know some Thai.)

ALSO:

Stay By My Side - Taiwan Fri Gaga 10 eps

Hidden Agenda that isn’t hidden - Thailand Sun GMMTV YouTube 12 eps

Low Frequency - Thailand Sat iQIYI 8 eps

Started But You Can Probably Wait IMHO

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI)

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki)

Wedding Plan (Weds YT & iQIYI) it's mame so A trash watch is happening!

Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga)

Hope this is what you wanted.

#asked and answered #ABL is your recommendation algorithm #thai bl #taiwanese bl #recommended bl #bl currently airing #step by step series #bl review #recently finished bl #La Pluie #Jun & Jun #Jun and Jun #korean bl #Laws of Attraction #Laws of Attraction series #To Sir With Love #Manner of Death #devil judge #lawless lawyer

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gaslightgallows · 8 months

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September 2023 Writing Round-Up

I just checked my tags, and I haven't done one of these since… three years ago. Exactly three years ago yesterday (9/29/20), to be precise. Which was pretty much when my mental health and my personal life started to crumble in earnest, and it took my desire to write for public consumption along with it.

Most of what I did for the rest of 2020/2021 were either struggling to finish works in progress (and largely failing) or archiving stuff from my LJ days. I didn't post anything in 2022. I was still writing (a lot) but it was either for Patreon (…fuck, right, I have a Patreon) or it was personal, not meant to be shared.

And then Good Omens came back and ended up being really fucking relevant to my life, and @meldanya44 was there urging me to get back into writing for other people besides her. I think it was a good idea, over all. ♥

So… yeah. Thanks, Good Omens fandom, for reminding me that writing is meant to be shared, and that I am a prompt-based lifeform. (I'll be putting up a new prompt list tomorrow, if anyone wants an artisanally crafted bespoke ficlet of their very own.)

Anyway, here's what I did in September:

Authorial Intent (G, one-shot): Michael’s plan to erase Aziraphale from the Book of Life has certain… flaws. A revision of the final season of S2 Ep6, where the Metatron does not make an appearance. (Actually posted at the end of August but this is my list and it counts. Written very shortly after I finished S2 for the first time. Effervescing with joy.)

Put Out the Stars (T, currently a one-shot, planning to continue): Crowley stole the photo of himself and Aziraphale from the shop a long time ago. (Inspired by one of @fellshish's asks. Angst angst angst… with more to come!)

An Invisible Wound (T, one-shot): “I almost killed you tonight.” “I almost got you killed tonight.” Their first kiss, soft and futile, is in 1941. (Bittersweet canon-compliant 1941 truthers unite.)

After the Rain (T, one-shot; for @meldanya44): The Second Coming has come and gone, and Crowley was calling him ‘angel’ again. (Wonderful quiet post-series fluff.)

Like Petals in a Storm (M, currently a standalone but working on a sequel; for @meldanya44): Between the discorporation and the almost-execution, Aziraphale’s having a bit of trouble keeping body and soul together. (My reputation-mandated 'one partner helps another bathe' fic.)

The Taste of Salt (G, one-shot; for @iamhisgloriouspurpose): The lingering taste of ox ribs are bitter and rich in Aziraphale's mouth, and he isn't sure what he believes anymore. (Continues the 'I'm not taking you to Hell, angel' scene in the Ep2 minisode. Nice and angsty. No one seems to like this one and I'm not sure why.)

Pipe Dream (G, one-shot; for @unwholesome-gay): All Aziraphale has ever wanted is to give heaven back to Crowley. (Domestic fluff about Aziraphale buying the South Downs cottage for Crowley. Fun fact: I struggled to write this and finally posted it in dismay and tried to forget about it. And then my inbox exploded with HEARTS, so I guess it wasn't as bad as I thought.)

The Patience of Angels, Chs 1-4 (M, multi-chapter WIP): An old enemy is on the hunt for the demon known as Crowley, and it will take all the powers of one very protective angel to save him. But in keeping Crowley safe, Aziraphale will uncover more of the terrible truths of Heaven than he ever wanted to know. (The longfic I first conceived of in 2019 and then never got around to finishing enough to post, and am now trying to revise the HELL out of in real-time because the original version doesn't work anymore. I love this fic with a burning passion and hope it finds an audience someday… which it probably will if I can update it, y'know, more often than once a month…)

Fics Posted: 8 Word Count: 28,182

I'm never going to be as prolific as I was when I was in the MCU fandom and had a much less-hectic job, but I'd call that a decent comeback. Thanks, everyone. ♥

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens fandom #good omens fanfiction #good omens fic #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #prompt fills #monthly round-up #meldanya44

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adobe-outdesign · 11 months

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Shelmet/karrablast lines review?

I'm going to preface this review by stating that I HATE trade-only evolutions. I'll spare you all from an extensive ramble, but the tl;dr is that they're obnoxious, counter-productive, and ultimately only serve to make it harder to get certain Pokemon.

HOWEVER, with that said, these two lines are the only time the idea of a trade-evo actually seems justified due to the way the two interact with each other. It's still not my favorite thing in the world (I feel like they could just evolve by being placed next to each other in one's party), but at least there's a rationale behind it instead of just abritrary decisions on the part of GameFreak.

Anyway, all that aside, I really like Shelmet here, and it's probably my favorite out of these four. The snail combined with a knight theme is super simple but reads really clearly, and the droopy eye and silly mouth give it a lot of personality. The colors are also nice, with the pinks and greens popping nicely against the neutral gray shell.

My only nitpick is related to the typing—this should've been bug/steel, for reasons we'll get into later.

Accelgor has a completely different, more ninja-esc theme, but this makes sense due to the loss of its shell, which was where all the knight theming came from in the first place.

This design is also good—the lines on the head accent the swirled shape nicely, which is also fairly accurate to how a shell-less snail looks. The pinks and greens once again draw attention to the head, and the brooding expression is great.

I'll admit though, something about the lower body throws me a bit. The body being bandaged to make up for the lack of a shell is great, but the actual shape of the body is so... flat and rigid compared to the nice curves of its head. Maybe if it curled a bit at the bottom too it would have a better flow. The bandages are also a bit too dark in color, loosing some of the contrast Shelmet's lighter gray had. Still, it's decent and gets the idea across well enough.

Gotta admit, I'm not a big fan of Karrablast. The idea of a beetle Pokemon makes perfect sense because it's based off of various kinds of beetles that eat snails and/or pupate in their shells, but Karrablast is just so amorphous and generic that you'd be hard pressed to even recognize it as a beetle, which really makes the theme fall apart a bit. Maybe it's just a me thing, as I'm not big on Pokemon with more "ambiguous" body shapes like this.

I also think it should've had more to do with Accelgor thematically. Escavalier "steals" Shelmet's knight theme, so I feel like Karrablast should've also had a ninja-ish theme to match Accelgor.

All that aside, it's okay. The expression is at least a lot of fun with its little fangs, and the colors contrast nicely compared to the Shelmet line's, but the light blue triangle on the head feels out of place and I'm not a big fan of the weird head-pincers. At the end of the day, it's not terrible, but it does feel like the weak link in this line.

Escavalier, however, is pretty fun. Expanding on Shelmet's knight theme, it now has a pair of lances and a large area on top of the helmet somewhat evocative of a feathered headpiece. The shape of this headpiece also helps match with the bottom half of the shell with its curved shape. Overall, a fun execution.

I do think it could've been a bit stronger conceptually though. For one, Shelmet mostly keeps the same palette as it evolves, so it feels like the red accents on Escavalier should've been blue to match its pre-evo; it would also simplify the palette, seeing as it already has Karrablast's blues and yellows on its body.

And secondly, the typing. It definitely feels like the steel-type comes out of nowhere when Shelmet is only bug-type. I think it would've been much better if Shelmet was bug/steel and Karrablast was bug/dark; then when they evolve, it flips, so Accelgor would've been bug/dark and Escavalier's bug/steel now fits with the concept. Minor thing obviously, but it's always bugged me (no pun intended). I still enjoy Escavalier overall regardless though.

As a whole, it's nice to see a line (or lines, in this case) that finally puts the trade evo idea to good use. I think the concept could've been stronger in a few spots, but it's still a fun theme and obvious enough to figure out through the visuals alone.

#shelmet #accelgor #karrablast #escavalier #pokemon #pokemon reviews

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kewpidity · 14 days

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ive made the executive decision to post my sims on here as well, so have this one i did of mandy

i did my best with what i had, like no cc i could find worked for her hair to have horns (everything i found looked terrible) couldnt even find a decent simple headband and this one clips a little, but her hair has the swoopy bangs and i think i nailed the eye shape and how i draw her so i'll take it

she's also wearing a kinderwhore look cause its simply correct

also made her school uniform cause i know its not canon but i think the idea of it being for a catholic school is v funny (dont mind the little knot in it its shockingly difficult to find a simple button up shirt for the sims that isnt super revealing kjfn)

leather jacket moment under the cut that didnt make it to the final look but i figured id share anyway ↷↷↷

#kewpies sims #grimandy #going in that tag as well cause this is about where she is when i imagine her in a relationship with grim

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xiyao-feels · 2 years

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Tbh I feel like something similar happens when people get really angry about LXC allowing LWJ to be beaten -> are people supposed to feel happy about it? It was neither politically savvy nor compassionate. How was he going to cover his brother’s death or permanent disability? Why would people cheer for a dude who chose something convenient yet blames another person for what happened to his brother?

I may suggest that there are options other than getting angry at LXC or feeling happy about it! Sad is a decent option, or anger at the entire system which led to WWX fighting in Nightless City. Or frustration at the limited options available to LXC! You have some options.

As to your arguments: I feel like it would actually have been pretty trivial to blame the fighting at Nightless City for LWJ's death or permanent disability? I mean there was just like...a huge battle. People believe that LWJ and WWX are serious enemies. I feel like this one works pretty well.

Beyond that though—when you say it's not politically savvy, I kind of get the sense you're failing to consider Lan internal politics. It's worth remembering that after LXC sees LWJ trying to save WWX he's worried that being found by someone from another clan could lead to LWJ being executed on the spot. What LWJ is doing is already a serious crime in-universe! And then after LXC goes and gets various seniors who already think very well of him...LWJ heavily injures all of these seniors!

LXC is in charge of the Lan clan, but he's not an absolute dictator; it's clear the seniors have some influence, not to mention LQR. Do you think that they'll all be just dandy if LWJ is unpunished? Of course not! He's seriously seriously trangressed!

I mean, attacking a senior is of course itself a serious transgression. But beyond that...man, I feel like people just aren't taking this seriously, not even in terms of cultural taboos but in terms of—

If someone attacks and seriously injures bunch of politicians who are trying to help them, do you actually expect the politicians to just go "yeah sure it's fine, he can do whatever?"

This is mostly a terrible analogy but the point I'm trying to make is that the seniors LWJ injured are political actors too. Moreover, so are many people who aren't the seniors LWJ injured, but who would be deeply offended by the idea that LWJ can do this and get off scot-free. LXC's not an absolute dictator; he doesn't have complete control over clan; he cannot actually just say that LWJ shouldn't have to suffer any consequences and that's that.

(He also probably actually does himself think LWJ did something wrong in heavily injuring the seniors. I suppose you could get angry at him for that if you wanted to.)

And the thing about this punishment is—you know, I don't know? Maybe he could have gotten away with a lesser punishment and then had LWJ spend the rest of his life in permanent disgrace. Or maybe not! I don't know, and it's hard to say without knowing information we just don't know. But this punishment functions as expiation: it's punishment enough for what he's done that after this he can resume his role and his internal status. He's allowed to keep Lan Sizhui, he's allowed to mostly wander around and do what he likes. I think sometimes the way it does count as sufficient punishment for what he's done, leads people to think he didn't need to be punished at all: after all, look at how the clan treats him! But that's backwards; if he hasn't been punished, he wouldn't still be treated in this way.

#I may regret this

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fanby-fckry · 2 months

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12. 20. 26. 31. 69. Of the new one please :)

Fanfiction Writing Asks

Thank you! :3

12. Do you outline your fics? If yes, how detailed are your outlines? How far do you stray from them?

I outline multichapter fics, because if I don’t, then I the plot suffers.

My outlines aren’t very detailed, though. Usually they’re just bullet points with some rough ideas for scenes/dialogue. Sometimes I even put memes in there.

The bullet point for the Unholyverse version of Dad Beat Dad currently just says, ‘Play dumb Lucifer; Not that dumb!’

Meanwhile, in the outline of my current WoE WIP, A Far Cry From Eden, we have the juxtaposition of me describing Eve’s first impression of each of the Seven Deadly Sins in a decent amount of detail, vs a chapter that was described as:

Totally not projecting my own sapphic experiences and/or fantasies onto Eve, there. No, never. (I’m gay and they’re both so pretty, I can’t help it!)

I do occasionally stray from my outlines, but that’s part of the beauty of making them so vague. I can usually adjust them as I go.

When I was working on Bloodlust and Butterflies, I had quite a few secondary bullet points that got dropped – although I’ll be revisiting the ideas later in other UH3 works – and one that got moved to a different chapter.

I need a plan for my multichapter fics. The plan is subject to change, but it’s still a plan.

20. Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics?

I feel like between the Unholyverse, the Little Demon AU, and my miscellaneous, canon-divergent Geraskefer fics, I should be legally required to answer this with AU, but canon has been looking kinda good lately.

3/5 of my current Ace Alastor Week WIPs have been canon-compliant. And it was kinda fun to work directly within the frame of canon. Like a little obstacle course for me to run. Enrichment.

I don’t think I’ll be switching to a steady stream of canon-compliant fics any time in the near future, but it’s been nice to explore.

26. What’s your least favorite part of the writing process?

Whichever part I happen to get stuck on when my executive dysfunction flares up. Or my psychosis.

If I had a consistently effective treatment for my ADHD and psychosis that didn’t give me terrible side effects, my life would improve sooo much.

Other than that, I don’t have a consistent part of writing that bothers me. Certain subject matter trips me up, and I get writer’s block from time to time just like everyone else, but there’s no part of my writing process that I’d call my least favorite.

31. Do you use a beta reader/editor?

I do! Specifically a beta reader. I edit my own work based on his suggestions. My lovely boyfriend, who now has a tumblr: @giggypoet .

69. What are your favorite fics at the moment?

Obligatory nice.

My favorite fics at the moment are (in no particular order) Death to Death by @moonrose91 , the entire 66.6 Live On Air! series by @prince-liest , and Means to an End by @iirationall .

#fanby answers #letmelickyoureyeballs #and they were mutuals #also:#moonrose91 #prince liest #iirationall #fic recs #fanby: uhverse #fanby: uh3 #fanby: woe #fanby: an age of upheaval #ask game #hazbin hotel #id in alt text #the boyf #<- mentioned

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aphverse-confessions · 6 months

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I don't hate Mystreet, sure it's bad(<underestimation) but like- it could be worse. There were decent concepts that were handled terribly, and there were moments where you could tell that Jess genuinely tried. I'm not saying it's good, but I see a lot of missed potential and poorly executed ideas that give a chance for the community to expand on that potential and actually have good writing. (Heck, I would never have learned to write if Mystreet didn't come around and inspire me to make something better)

Sorry if this is confusing, it's hard for me to explain my opinions

#aphmau #aphblr #aphverse #aphmau confessions #aphmau mystreet #mystreet #anon I get what ur saying #she laid good foundation and executed the concept poorly #but the foundations allowed for fan creativity and inspiration

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emersonfreepress · 1 year

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Sorry if you've answered this already but, what does the nerve stat mean? What lowers/increases it? Will there be any consequences if it's too low or high? Cheers :)

I don't think I have! Honestly, it's still a bit of a work in progress, along with the Remorse, Stress, and Thrill stats. I think going over them all should give you an idea of what I'm trying to do with them, but they're very subject to change.

Stress - pretty straightforward: stressful shit increases Stress 😆 High Stress can fuck up your execution of certain choices and will be noticed by other characters in day-to-day life. New Kid's Stress goes down when they engage with their hobby, when something good happens to them, or in positive social interactions with the ROs or their family.

Remorse - also pretty obvious: feeling bad feels bad! Expressing guilt or regret over your crimes and immoral actions increases Remorse. Compassionate MCs can gain more Remorse than Cutthroat MCs over certain things. I think this stat will also be relevant if I decide to make all action choices available during Missions... like instead of blocking off a particularly cruel choice for MCs with high Compassion, they would still be able to do it but they'd take on a bunch of Remorse. I haven't decided all of the situations that Remorse on its own can impact yet, but I imagine the success of attempting some out-of-character monster shit when your Remorse is already high would be a disaster 🥰🥰

Thrill - Relishing in your crimes and manipulations. This one's very much in development (like, in the earliest prep portion lol I don't even got the seasoning out yet) because it needs to be included, but I'm not interested in writing a colossally destructive or gleefully violent killer MC. Thrill is meant to relate to all actions that significantly go against the law or societal expectations. So obviously your Thrill can increase due to how you react in Missions but doing shit like sneaking out to a punk show with Rupan/Rohan (one way you can spend Halloween 🥰) would also increase it. I once had it as an opposing variable with Remorse, but that doesn't feel right since Thrill doesn't have to be directly tied to cruelty and evil.

Nerve - Finally! It's the ability to successfully carry out difficult or complicated actions despite external distractions or personal feelings. High Nerve is great if you are, for example, trying to get your Compassionate MC with High Remorse to do something terrible. You would still be able to try with low or decent Nerve, but with a chance of mixed results or failure. However, having high Nerve in a situation where all of the normal people in the room are freaking the fuck out? It's not necessarily a bad thing... but it does stand out.

These kinds of variables could probably be applied to things like artistic or academic performance too, but so far I really want to stick to applying them to social interaction and criminal activities only. Keep it consistent with the game's stakes. There should be no debate about the New Kid's talent, but their morality should always be in flux.

ok i talked way too much about this bye!!

#hope that answers the question?#if it helps #i think of kile as having high thrill and gabe as having high nerve #lovely anon #answered #mechanics #nice to finally get that all typed out in a succinct way lol

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heliads · 2 years

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All By Design Chapter Two: you don't ever say too much

Y/N L/N is Icarus incarnate, a falling star of a singer who only feels bliss when she's burning down. Nikolai Lantsov is what becomes of golden youth when finally forced into harsh reality. Both of them need something to save their reputations. The solution? A relationship to turn the tide of the tabloids. The only problem is that they really, really can't stand each other, and that makes faking endless love impossible to bear.

this chapter's song: lavender haze

chapter one / series masterlist / chapter three

This has only been going on for a week and a half, and Nikolai Lantsov can already tell that it’s not going to work out. Nine days; that’s all it took. Anyone with a brain could figure that out from the start. He certainly did. Why in the world would dating Y/N L/N of all people ever be able to solve a single thing?

He’s still infuriated about it, but at least he manages to keep his cool on the outside. Nikolai has long been used to following the script, sticking to the story until the words written for him become indistinguishable from his innermost thoughts, but this time it’s wearing at him like nothing else. Y/N L/N. Saints, if he’d heard about this even a year ago, his past self would never have been able to let him forget it.

It makes no sense, this plan. The idea is decent, but the execution is terrible. A good PR relationship never hurt a soul. It’s a classic tool, one that’s been pulled out in cases of distress about a hundred times before. Nikolai’s reputation may live and die as long as he’s still around, but even millions of years in the future, there will still be celebrities faking love to keep themselves relevant.

After all, isn’t that what Nikolai is doing? He grew tired of the way the headlines talk about him and he wanted something to change. He has always been Hollywood’s golden boy, and the moment he started to fade towards something as secondary as silver, he couldn’t take it anymore. It is dreadfully conceited, but at least one person in this fake relationship is thinking about the consequences of their actions. He doesn’t think Y/N has cared what the press thought about her since the day she was born.

She’s the polar opposite of Nikolai, to put it concisely. Few people on this earth were raised in the Lantsov household, he gets that. The first words he ever spoke were probably coaxed out of him with the sole purpose of being immediately sent to the nearest reporter. There are expectations that he has always met. His parents were famous in their own right, old world superstars who could never adequately deal with the changing of the times. They invested in Nikolai so he could handle the passage of the decades for them.

Ever since, he’s been fighting a losing battle trying to keep his family name out of the mud. If the rest of the world were content to just prop his parents up on a pedestal and let them desiccate there forever, he’d probably be far better off. Instead, Nikolai has to run himself ragged trying to make enough good decisions that the press focuses on him instead of whatever has become of his parents’ delusion of keeping the past alive.

Needless to say, it’s a lot of work to keep his ledger clean. Nikolai doesn’t know what people really think about him– do they hate him, for example, for trying so hard when they’ve given up– but he knows what they say, and that’s enough. They praise him over champagne at crowded parties and curse him over wine alone at night. It is the only thing he has ever known and it will be the only thing he will ever know. His life will stay the same until the day his heart can’t take the stress anymore and finally gives out.

Nikolai had assumed that the rest of the rich and famous would feel at least half the desire to keep his streets clean as he does, but he is quickly learning otherwise. If there was one person in the world who has an outlook on life as far removed from Nikolai’s as possible, it would probably be Y/N. Of course, she’s the woman he has to date for camera purposes. It’s as if everyone wants them to fail.

In all honesty, they probably do. He can count on a few people in this mess, but not many. Y/N has her PR officer, that relentless weapon of a woman affectionately referred to as Zoya Nazyalensky, and Nikolai has his two agents. Twins Tolya Yul-Bataar and Tamar Kir-Bataar have been at Nikolai’s side for quite some time. He doesn’t know what he’d do if they were to abandon ship, but they’ve sworn to stick by him quite a few times, so that’s at least one front on which Nikolai can rest.

Tolya and Tamar are deeply needed. There was a time in Nikolai’s life in which he was certain that he couldn’t do this, he couldn’t be his parents’ little prince with the weight of the world on his shoulders. He tried to run away, or get as far away as he possibly could given the fact that his every movement is closely followed by a sizable portion of the population. The twins found a way to keep him steady, and in the end, Nikolai is here again, still smiling at the cameras, still finding ways to stick together all his cracked pieces before someone notices.

That’s another reason Nikolai deeply needs this relationship ruse to work. If the tabloids get bored, they’ll start digging. They might even find a reason to look into why no one had heard much of him during a select period of a few years in the past. There are things that he would like to keep private, and if dating pop superstar Y/N L/N means that those secrets stay buried, well, he’ll do as good a job as any of feigning love. Nikolai has been acting his entire life. He could make anyone believe a lie, even himself.

That would make one of them committed to the act, at least. Nikolai isn’t too sure about the other party involved. He saw Y/N’s reaction firsthand to the idea of dating him, and although he can’t blame her for not being too excited about it, he needs her to get on board with the idea. She has to do this as much as he does. It would do her some good to at least try and make it work.

It’s easy to blame her for the fact that they can’t stand each other, of course. In reality, it’s not as simple as that. Nikolai is deeply biased against her, perhaps just as much as she seems to dislike him. They’re both sprinting in the other direction as fast as they can, but when their hands are tied like this, neither of them can escape for long. They’re going to be together, Saints damn it, but that doesn’t stop them from trying to fight it.

It’s been nine days of this, and already that’s nine days too long. They’re just too different, that’s all. Y/N sees Nikolai as some sort of monolith standing in the way of her own freedom. He sees her as a thunderstorm descending upon his carefully laid plans. They’re both going to wreck this thing unless they just get it together.

Unfortunately, the act of getting it together is far too hard for either of them to bear at the moment. The ruse has already gone public; they were seen together once, twice in the public eye. Enough paparazzi cameras have snapped their photos for the rumor to go viral. A few carefully staged photos later and the world is head over heels for the least likely couple to ever strike the fame scene in years.

At the start, everything was going to plan. Reporters and podcasters, talk show hosts and bloggers were all going crazy trying to connect the dots to make their story make sense. Everyone thought it was damned brilliant– two people who could never be more different managing to fall in love because at the core, they’re the same sort of soul. It’s enough to make anyone choke on the saccharine purity of it all.

The problem is that Y/N and Nikolai just cannot act like they’re in love for the life of them. Nikolai has always played a false part in whatever room he was in, but this role might be his most challenging one yet. He sees her and he wants to put up a fight. They can’t lock eyes without exchanging a glare or two. It’s impossible to do anything else.

At first, they were able to disguise it fairly well. No one on the other side of the screen had any idea how long it took to get a few usable selfies of Y/N kissing his cheek that they could post as a confirmation. Nikolai was a few strikes away from holding a solemn funeral for the jacket he was forced to give to her so it seemed like they were sharing clothes. They had two ‘dates’ out in the public eye, one on the beach and one in a crowded restaurant. It took every fiber of strength in Nikolai’s body to make it through both.

Those were only the first outings, though, and at that point the rest of the world was so caught up in trying to figure out how they met and who must have asked who out first to really think about what was going on. Whatever questions they initially asked have been buried under more pressing information by now, such as why in the hell they would ever be able to tolerate each other long enough for this to work out.

Everyone’s starting to realize it, though. They can tell now how little Nikolai and Y/N like each other. He’s already seen countless videos of self-proclaimed body language experts analyzing the stiffness of Nikolai’s arm around Y/N’s shoulder, the way she’s always turned away from him whenever they walk together. It is obvious to anyone paying decent attention that they cannot stand each other for a second. This is, of course, the truth, but the truth isn’t what they’re after here.

No, the whole point of this is to make it convincing, and if they only last two weeks, it’ll be the sorriest story to ever hit the papers. Nikolai is not in the mood to fail, and if he could ever claim similarity with Y/N in any way, it’s that she isn’t the type to give up, either. They both need this to work, even if what they want more than anything is for this to be over already.

They both agreed to it, though, and that means they have to stick it out until the end. The nice thing is that the ruse was never meant to be permanent. Nikolai was given a date when he’ll finally be able to break this off for good: two months from now, a Friday so they can get the full press swarm to descend just in time for the weekend. He’s already marked it on his calendar with bright red ink and perhaps even a smiley face or two.

Until then, he’s going to have to suffer through it. That’s what he was trying to do already, but evidently his torture was evident enough to anyone with a decent pair of eyes. Nine days pass by from the first meeting and Nikolai finds himself dragged back before his PR team once again. This time, they’re hosting a joint session. Tolya and Tamar sit on either side of Zoya. Y/N arrived before him this time, and as he takes a chair next to her, he can’t shake the feeling that they’re both misbehaving schoolchildren about to undergo a lecture from a disappointed principal.

Zoya starts off on the tirade of how they’ve both deeply messed up by hating each other and letting the world see it. Although the chastisement is directed to both of them, Nikolai can’t help feeling like he’s unfairly getting the brunt of it. That could just be the fact that he has both twins glaring at him instead of just Zoya. Then again, Nikolai is fairly certain that Zoya’s glower could make up for the combined fury of a small nation.

Zoya’s fingers are steepled in front of her. “I don’t even know why I’m bothering to list out all my grievances, both of you are well aware of why I’m upset. The whole point of this was that you were going to act like you were in love, so act like it. You’re not supposed to hate each other, or at least not in public.”

Y/N arches a brow. “It’s a little difficult to act like I’m head over heels for someone I just met a week and a half ago.” The second part of her complaint goes unspoken: especially when that someone is him. Nikolai, demon incarnate.

Zoya looks like she’s fighting to not roll her eyes. “I don’t care if the two of you want to kill each other in private. Do what you want, but don’t do it in front of the cameras, for the Saints’ sake. I shouldn’t have to tell you this. Are you this unfamiliar with the concept of a PR relationship? We’re not trying to set you up for happiness, just a chance to redo your reputations. Which are falling apart, in case you’ve forgotten. Your little lovers’ spat isn’t exactly helping that.”

Nikolai chuckles. “Well, it’s good to know that even when we mess up, we can count on your startlingly good humor to encourage us towards success once more. Everything makes sense now.”

He says the last bit with a knowing glance towards Y/N. Her face twists in a scowl. She looks as if she wants to fervently deny ever having talked to him in her life about Zoya or anything else for that matter. How dare he make it seem as if they’ve been so much as forced acquaintances! The sheer force of her indignation makes him smile. He’s cruel like that when it serves his fancy best.

The twins exchange looks and Tamar speaks up. “Listen, everyone here knows what we need to accomplish. All we’re asking is that you put your personal feelings aside. This has to work or you’ll be in a worse spot than before because they’ll know you’re trying to save your respective reputations.”

“And nothing could be worse than admitting weakness in public,” Y/N mutters. For once, Nikolai agrees with her.

Zoya claps her hands together briskly. “Alright, then. This was a warning, I don’t want it to happen again. If you need another warning, it’ll probably be too late anyway.”

She stands up. Nikolai moves to follow suit but Tolya holds up a hand.

“Actually, how about the two of you stick around a little longer? I feel that it would be good if both of you really talked about this. It’s important that everyone is of the same mind in a matter like this.”

Nikolai can feel himself sparking with irritation, but before he can argue his way out of this, Tamar nods along. “Yes, I think that sounds good. You two have been avoiding each other for long enough, this might actually lead to some breakthroughs.”

Despite Nikolai’s best attempts at telepathically screaming his lungs out at her, Tamar just smirks at him and leaves the room alongside her brother. Zoya shoots Y/N one last dangerous look, then sweeps from the room. Just like that, they’re alone.

Tamar isn’t wrong, Nikolai has been doing his best to spend as little time as possible with Y/N as he can. Can he really be blamed for that, though? Every time they speak, they fight, and that’s surely just as bad for the press to see as them forcing themselves to endure each other’s company.

Y/N folds her arms across her chest and looks at him dourly. “I thought you’d be better at this. You know, seeing as pretending you’re something you’re not is literally your job.”

Nikolai forces himself to grin at that, even if he feels more like baring his teeth in a snarl. “I assume that’s a reference to acting and not anything else. I would hate to think that you’d want to hurt my feelings.”

Y/N’s smile is incredibly bitter. He’s almost impressed by the sheer quantity of resentment that she’s able to pack into a slight twist of her lips. “And who could possibly want that? Then again, if I wanted something to hurt you, I’d probably just stay here a little longer. After all, we’re both so awful for each other that even the podcasters are starting to pick up on it.”

“Obviously it’s a problem,” Nikolai replies, “but if you’re calling my acting skills into question, believe me when I say that I can give a legendary performance. As for you, though, I’d be a bit more concerned. Music videos aren’t exactly the pinnacle of a dramatic showcase.”

Y/N’s eyes widen. “Oh, you think you know anything about performance? I’ve moved entire stadiums to tears. Trust me, Nikolai, if there’s one thing I can do it’s put on a good show. If you have no script to walk you through every syllable, though, I don’t know how well you’d do.”

Nikolai laughs. It might be even half genuine. “I’d like to see you prove that.”

“You’re on,” Y/N returns, and the fire of competition in her eyes tells him that she might finally be convinced.

So is he, as it turns out. If he can’t be brought to act like he’s in love with her for the sheer purpose of saving his legacy, he can at least do it to beat her out. Nikolai is about to put on a performance worthy of at least an Oscar or two. He’ll be so good at it that even the twins will be impressed.

He stands and offers Y/N a hand in mock solemnity. She shakes it with equal fervor. It’s on, then. Whatever happens next, at least they won’t go down for lack of effort. If Nikolai didn’t know better, he’d say that he’s almost looking forward to seeing what becomes of them. Certainly the rest of the world will agree.

grishaverse tag list: @rogueanschel, @deadreaderssociety, @cameronsails, @mxltifxnd0m, @story-scribbler, @retvenkos, @thatfangirl42, @amortensie, @gods-fools-heroes, @bl606dy

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silvertsundere · 1 month

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Silver Talks AniManga (21/04/24)

I actually haven't watched BA yet cause there aren't any (good) subs out atm and it's prob gonna take a couple days so if I have something to say about this episode I will next week but anyway

green - new series/new to me blue - finale/completed

Anime

Jellyfish Can't Swim in the Night Ep 3

that was a really good ep, helps that I can relate to kiui a lot more than the other 3 too. tomita miyu did a great job as her and the direction was really good too. I saw the "twist" coming early in the episode and when they explained the story for the play I figured where it was going but it was still very well executed. now that the main cast has been assembled I'll be looking forward to what shenanigans they get up to

Kaiju 8 Ep2

also a good ep, think I liked it more than 1 despite a couple awkward bits that were better in the manga like the window opening. which speaking of opening the op sucks ass holy, I wasn't a fan of the ed in the previous ep but I was like "well it's just generic radio pop it's not that bad" but they really goofed it with the op huh. they're clearly desperate to make this a hit in the west considering how popular the manga is over here too but getting mainstream artists to do your op/ed isn't gonna help. I mean look at mashle, s2 was a lot more popular and even the manga sales got a huge boost cause of how much people liked the op. shoulda went with something catchier like that instead but whatever but anyway, I also really liked the shinomiya scenes, she's one of my favourites so it was fun seeing her in action. looking forward to her getting more scenes next ep and showing off

Wonderful Precure! Ep12

one of the best eps so far, to me, we even got some sakuga crumbs. from when the designs originally leaked yuki had my favourite design by far and her being a cat girl was good too. she's also the only one so far to commit violence which is exactly what I was hoping for. she'll probably stop it in the future cause of the other cures but I'll cherish it while I can. it's kinda weird that they made her blonde in the human form but I guess it's so the transformed and human form don't have the same hair colour. I love her voice tho, not really seen her in any roles except hoshi syoko from imas but that's a good one. she was also beryberie in the previous precure season so it's a pretty big upgrade to go from a side chara to a main cure, good for her. but yeah, I figured from the start yuki/nyammy would be my favourite and seeing her in action now solidified that idea even more, I'll be looking forward to seeing more of her in the coming eps

Manga

Kyokuto Necromance Ch1

this new series is by naba fusai who did aliens area a couple years ago. gave that a 4 in the end but it wasn't a terrible manga by any means. this one felt a lot better tho, you can really tell the author leveled up a lot since the previous series ended, the art is a lot sharper and easy to read. the chapter itself was pretty similar to the aliens area one but more engaging. they did a good job setting up the basic premise and giving a decent understanding how stuff works anyway, the powers system is similar to stands so that's cool, it's fun to see other people's take on araki's baby. we're gonna have to see with the next few chaps but just from chap 1 I think this could survive for a good while

Shadow Eliminators Ch19 (Finale)

Despite the 3 score I don't got much to say about this. Unlike something like ichigoki or ichinose fam which were REALLY bad so I had a lot to talk about, or something like aliens area or super smartphone which weren't completely terrible cause they had some neat ideas, I basically have nothing to say about this. The art and designs are REALLY good as easily the best part about this manga but everything else about it was pretty generic and forgettable. I would give this author another chance but they would have to spend a lot of time cooking to come up with something more compelling than this. They would probably be better off and teaming up with someone else and letting them do the story while they do the art cause, again, that was really really good and significantly better than the average series we get better luck next time mr kento, may you avoid the U19 club

Astro Royale Ch2

hey that was a pretty good chap too, it felt a lot like an early OP chap which is cool, I said on ch1 that we'd have to see with the next few chaps how this would go but if it continues having the same energy from these 2 chaps I could totally see this being the next long runner in the magazine. ofc it could go south in the next handful of chaps but it's a veteran author so I have some trust it won't

#silver talks animanga

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mik-mania · 2 months

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i keep forgoring to do daily fantroll facts so heres some bits i typed up:

Antemh had a rough upbringing. His lusus was a feral wolfdog mixed with probably some other animal. His lusus tough on Antemh--he could be likened to Bro Strider in how he raised Antemh to be a resilient survivor. Antemh's lusus would engage Antemh in terrible fights, and he didn't hold back. It's impressive that Antemh made it to adulthood because his lusus had a high rate of grub deaths. No fight move was too dirty to use, teaching Antemh that he couldn't trust that even his caretaker would hold back. This has led to Antemh being always somewhat on guard and hypervigilant. Antemh's final fight with his lusus was a fight to the death--his lusus would not have stopped until Antemh was dead or near-death. Antemh killed his lusus but at a high emotional cost.

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Acklin grew up knowing she was loved. The Martinet was afraid to raise her by hand in close quarters, worried that he would fumble her grubhood as his mother had his, so Acklin grew up with a good amount of freedom to an extent. While she was allowed to be her own person, she also quite literally grew up in a bubble, as The Martinet was worried about anything happening to her. Acklin was quite sheltered growing up, leading to her gentle and thoughtful nature. She's never quite had any real world struggles, meaning she's had plenty of time to persue intellectual and social studies and philosophize. Despite the introduction of the young mothergrub being relatively recent, Acklin's always had a sense of what she was meant to become as an adult and never really challenged the idea. It was a comfortable thought, although she felt somewhat melancholy about the inevitability of the future, preferring the present and wishing it could stay as it was.

////////

Safron had a normal upbringing. He had on-planet friends, a decent home, and a lusus that took care of him. Growing up, he wanted to become an astronomer or maybe even a magician. He was optimistic as a kid and benefitted greatly from having no affiliation with any clown groups. However, once he was off-planet, he found himself struggling. His upbringing had not prepared him in the slightest for adulthood.

Safron's lack of connections in religious circles left him with no real career path, most purpleblood jobs being in relation to the churches. He had no desirable traits or skills--the only thing he'd ever really been good at had been socializing and being charming. His difficulty in finding a suitable job and being too proud to take a lower class job resulted in him being on the streets. Jobless and homeless, Safron soon found that he *did* have a talent: smooth-talking.

He became self-serving. Safron began to associate with shady characters, taking on odd jobs and negotiating deals here and there. He developed into being a bit of a skeezy guy. After a few run-ins with the law, his final arrest led to his execution... and you know the rest.

#safron zurgaz #antemh deonis #acklin firini #typin these out to get an idea of what i wanna do for the asks

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anxietywithfloof · 10 months

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Warning: This is a long post that i need to make for my own mental health, so if you don't want to look at this all, then I recommend going to the tl;dr section at the end, but if you do read, thank you.

Also, no names will be put because I DON'T want anyone to be dragged into this shit either. Don't go looking for them either, as I will refuse to give names of anyone. Thank you.

I don't care if you like, share, reblog, whatever. I'm not doing this for fame or to call out anyone. I just want to rid this of myself and to move on and to forgive those that I'm potentially leaving.

With all that out of the way, let's begin:

I have an announcement.

I'm taking a break from the commewnity. For a while. Idk when I'll be back, if at all. I might still talk to a few members of the commewnity, but don't expect anymore OCs from me if i decide to leave it forever. Everyone has proven they don't like them anyway. I'm angry, had multiple breakdowns, and a counselor told me this was my best bet to have my mental health be better.

Let me tell my POV.

I want to put this to rest, never to be a problem ever again.

All from the moment this shitstorm started.

My second ever reference sheet.

It was terrible, to be frank. I didn't know how to draw a Mewtwo at ALL, as well as how to execute my ideas in a drawing format or how to make a skeleton for drawing poses and such. Hell, I deleted it off of my Tumblr AND my phone because I hated it that much later on. All I knew is that I wanted one that represented me. My anxiety, my imperfections that I see in myself, my creativity. I made it and wasn't sure of the looks. It looked weird and I wasn't sure. My boyfriends and all my friends told me they loved it, however, so I went with it, nervous as hell.

This is the start of a mistake I made.

At this point, I had a couple of friends in the commewnity and I was doing decent. At least...I thought.

I wanted to join a Mew and Mewtwo server that was VERY popular, with some amazing, incredible artists and members in it, so I asked to get in.

I never got in. Still haven't.

They said they were "weary/wary" of me, which at the time, didn't make sense and...after a while...I lost, losing a friend in the process...

This was a while ago and I no longer wish to be in. It won't happen regardless, so why should I care anymore.

But the thing is...all the mods were too. From the old and bad ref that, at THAT time, I had changed and it was a bit better.

Informed it was because of my character, I tried to fix it. And, after a couple of iterations, is how you see them today. Marla. And I probably will rework them more in the future because they're a really interesting character that I want to make lore and deep characterization for.

I deleted all the old ones and that became what she looked like. Everything good, right?

Except it wasn't.

I found out other members talked about me, never even letting me KNOW about it, all behind my back saying they were uncomfortable about me, always pulling up that same damn old ref sheet that I deleted long ago and I HATED. They started saying it was a fetish character, a kink character, an NSFW character.

Marla. Is. Not. NSFW.

She's never been one and never WILL be one. NONE of my characters are, in fact. I'm a minor! I'm 16! Why the HELL would I make a character intended to be an NSFW character and post them out in the open?! What's worse?? Even though I cleared that up, they STILL think that no matter WHAT I say AND they still are holding onto that old damned ref that I didn't have confidence for in the first place.

Then they started saying they were wary because of other things, like accounts that were recommended (to which I do NOT know why they were bad for a small amount of time. Only thing I can think of is maybe because of the controversy. Maybe I accidentally followed an account that was 18+ that didn't state they were on the front. Idk. I still don't 100% know, but I think it's been fixed), to my desperation at the time to be in the server, which I get, but you have to understand that I came from a school that bullied me relentlessly and made me feel alone 24/7, so this felt like a chance at finally being heard or seen, to even my fucking ARTSTYLE and OUTCOME, to which, I need to say this. I have no control of my artstyle. My artstyle is the result of COUNTLESS practice and finding different tutorials to borrowing techniques of my favorite shows, so I'm sorry if the artstyle makes you wary of me. I can't control my own artstyle. I'm trying to IMPROVE and make it more refined, but I can't outright get rid of my artstyle. And I ALSO hate the outcome of my art sometimes. I'm not the best at angles and that feeling of "ugh. This looks off...even though I made it" happens to ANYONE that draws as a hobby. I've deleted FAR more artworks than I've posted because it looked off or I thought it could do better. So, I'm sorry my efforts also weren't enough. I really am. Like, genuine.

It's gotten to the point where I don't feel comfortable posting ANYTHING because I'm worried mods and others in the server or in the commewnity will hate me MORE for it for even MORE misconceptions and false reasons I don't know of yet. I've felt alone. Shunned. Bitter. Felt like I wasn't good enough for a chance at redemption. I've asked multiple times if i could do anything to be even in any way I could, but nothing.

If I wanted to feel like this again, I would've stayed at my old school. It's gotten to the point it feels like bullying or gatekeeping or just outright shunning me from others because of all this.

So I'm taking a break.

To those people, I've forgiven you. I've forgiven you for all this.

If you want to talk about it and work anything out...I'll be on Tumblr... and I hope we CAN work things out. But for now, I won't be giving attention to the commewnity for a while.

I love the community and I love the creativity hosted in it, but I need to do this for my mental health. I'm sorry to everyone who considers me a friend in the commewnity and I hope this whole thing can finally be solved and this whole thing can finally pass, being able to actually talk to creators and not be shunned for honest mistakes and misconceptions.

Thank you for listening and I hope everyone's daycare be a bit brighter. Mine included.

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TL;DR, an old ref I don't like because I didn't know what I was doing with the design is being hanged over my head as well as misconceptions of my characters, especially Marla, causing me to be isolated and I need a break from it.

If you want to speak, private chat me on Tumblr or Discord. You might need to wait until after I get home from school, bit I'm willing to chat or clear things up.

Thank you.

I'm sorry.

#long post #tw ed rant #rant #tw long post #finally sharing my point of view and how i see things because i dont know every reason they are weary.#this is all i know so far and my experienxes to back it up as well as my answers to thw misconceptions #i love you all commewnity #controversy

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duhragonball · 1 year

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Dragon Ball GT 43

✨GT Stands for Garish Travesty✨

✨”Good” “Ideas”, Poorly Executed✨

So the “idea” here was to have Goku fight Frieza and Cell in Hell. We already saw this in DBZ 195, and it didn’t even go down, because Pikkon swooped in and took out both of these guys and King Cold before Goku could get to them.

But still, this could be a good time. The plot here is that all the classic villains have returned to invade Earth, and Goku’s trapped in Hell with Frieza and Cell, so this seems like a decent set up for some great action. You’ve got plenty of star power, and even if Goku has these two outmatched, it’s a two-on-one deal, so maybe it can still work out.

Except for one thing. This is Dragon Ball GT, and for some reason they decided that this episode should look like absolute dogshit.

Frieza kind of looks all right... I guess? He looks pretty crappy, but he seems more or less recognizable.

But Cell looks like some shitty new character wearing a Cell costume. His eyes are too big, and he just looks wrong in every shot.

This is just a really unpleasant episode to watch. I knew this was coming, and I thought I was prepared for it, but man, it’s just ugly. There are some off-model characters in episodes of DB and DBZ, but somehow this one just sinks to a completely different level.

It’s something about the eyes, I think. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but everyone looks really wrong. And unfortunately, there’s a lot of close up shots of the characters, all looking like misshapen bootleg action figures.

This is so bad. I’m not even kidding a little. If the episode had a better plot or script, I could forgive the bad animation, but no. It sucks in every possible way.

This was my introduction to Dragon Ball GT, by the way. In 2004, I bought a strategy guide for one of the games, Budokai 2, and it came with a DVD of this episode. The idea was to promote GT, which would be airing on Cartoon Network later that year. I assume they picked Episode 43 because of all the star power. In addition to the main cast, you also have Cell, Frieza, Nappa, 17, and Dr. Gero. It’s like a damn reunion. Except the episode sucks ass. Everyone looks terrible, and even thought there’s a lot of fighting going on, all of it is pathetic.

All right, let’s dive in to this turkey.

In brief: Goku’s fight with Cell and Frieza sucks because none of them take the fight seriously. All I wanted was for Goku to blow the bad guys mind with some Super Saiyan 4 action, but instead he refuses to transform at all. He still does an overblown power-up any way, but he doesn’t transform. Goku still styles all over these two, and they can’t even touch him. When Frieza tries a ki disc, Goku rides it like a surfboard. Then he grabs a needle spike from the scenery and weilds it like his nyo’ibo. So he’s just recreating his classic look from the old days. That’s how seriously Goku is taking this. Cell fires a Kamehameha at Goku, and he just knocks it back at him with his stick. Cell gets blown up by his own attack, and the ki disc slices Frieza in half.

But that doesn’t matter, because Cell and Frieza are already dead, so they just come back and keep fighting. We don’t see them regenerate or anything, because the animators are lazy, as well as bad. Cell manages to sucker Goku in and... catches him with his tail?

Yeah, so he tries to absorb Goku and assimilate his power, the way he absorbed 17 and 18 to achieve his perfect form. But... that’s not how Cell works. For a moment, it seems like Cell has actually increased his power this way, but then Goku just forces himself back out of his tail, and escapes. This is stupid.

So Frieza and Cell use a new technique to turn the tables on Goku, the Hell Buster. This traps Goku in a ki structure, which they then launch down into the lower depths of hell. So they’re not really defeating Goku so much as relocating him to some place else where the environment will finish him off.

Then this old lady subjects Goku to four different torments on the “Hell Pilgrimage”: She cooks Goku in a giant stew pot, then subjects him to tickle torture, then a sauna, then she freezes him with a big machine.

Frieza promises that they’ll come down there to finish him off. So if they could do that Hell Buster move from the start, why did they even bother attacking him with anything else?

Meanwhile, the Earth is being besieged by all the other villains, like... uh... the Saibamen! Remember them? Well they’re back! Yeah, who else have we got?

More Saibamen! Wow, look at them go. This is pretty bad news for the Earth. It’s too bad Goku isn’t here to put a stop to this. But it’s not just Saibamen plaguing the world. No, there’s also...

... Saibamen. I don’t remember there being this many of them before. Did they have an orgy or something to make more?

Goten and Trunks just sort of watch all this with a mixture of disgust and fear. Uub literally flies over and asks them to step in and help. I have no idea why this is happening. The Saibamen aren’t even that tough. Uub just flies through the streets, taking them out with one hit apiece, but Goten and Trunks seem reluctant to pitch in.

Meanwhile, Pan and Mr. Satan are being chased by... General Rildo. Can we go back to the Saibamen, please? Gohan shows up to save them, and now we’ve got Rildo vs. Gohan, a dream match if there ever (yawn!) was one.

Okay, so this appearance by Rildo is the only confirmation we have that he died in Episode 23. This episode makes zero effort to reintroduce the character. He doesn’t even get any lines! Shouldn’t Rildo be using his final form in this thing? Is he helping the bad guys because of his loyalty to Dr. Mu? Or is he actually loyal to Baby? Shouldn’t he be asking where Baby is during all of this? I mean, either he wants to keep working for Baby, or he should want to kick Baby’s ass because Baby killed Dr. Mu.

Or, you would think he’d want to stay in Hell to fight Goku, since he’s supposed to be stronger than anyone else on the bad guy team, remember? Goku said his ki was “even greater than Buu’s”.

Oh, and Nappa’s also here. He blows up an entire city, which is the most any of these guys seem to have done since they invaded, but then Vegeta confronts him. Strange that Vegeta waited until after the city got destroyed before stepping in, but whatever. At least this promises to be an interesting scene. Nappa’s no match for Vegeta, but they know each other well, and you could get some drama out of this encounter if....

Yeah, Vegeta one-shots him. Never mind.

Then Gero and Mu show up and introduce Vegeta to their latest creation, “Hell Fighter 17.” He bursts out of the rubble and there’s flames and everything, and Vegeta doesn’t seem too impressed. Then they fight, and Vegeta doesn’t bother turning Super Saiyan. He can’t hit Hell Fighter 17, but since he won’t transform, it makes it seem like he’s not even trying.

As they fight, Hell Fighter 17 telepathically contacts his counterpart, the original 17, and asks him what’s taking him so long. Remember, the plan was for both 17′s to link up and fuse into a single, invincible warrior. Apparently Hell Fighter 17 is having some trouble with Vegeta, so he’s anxious to get that boost in power. Well why did they go picking a fight with Vegeta, then? They could have waited for both 17′s to combine, and then gone after him.

Instead, Original 17 tracks down his sister, Android 18, and invites her to join them. We’ve yet to establish how Gero and Mu are controlling the original 17, but presumably they’re using Hell Fighter 17 to do it, and now Original 17 is using the same trick to influence 18. Except Gero’s team never told him to do this, so I have to assume this wasn’t part of the plan.

Let me add some context here. Nobody has seen 17 in years. It was assumed that he got resurrected at the end of the Cell Games, but they never actually showed 17-- dead or alive-- until the very end of the Kid Buu fight, when he makes a cameo appearance to send energy to Goku’s Spirit Bomb. This episode is set sixteen years after that battle, and no one ever says anything about keeping in touch with the guy.

In fact, in the previous episode, it’s strongly implied that Trunks had never met 17 before the ambush. He sensed 17′s ki, noticed it was similar to 18′s, and figured it out that way. Which is bullshit, by the way. 17 and 18 don’t have ki signatures for Trunks to sense.

So when 17 confronts 18 (and Krillin and Marron), it’s the first time they’ve been on screen together since 17 got absorbed by Cell. That was 23 years ago. It’s never established whether they’ve been in contact during that time, or if this is their first meeting since 17 was wished back to life. This is a stupid way to reintroduce a character.

I think the idea with this arc was to focus on 17, because he was the one villain who never got killed or rehabilitated. We never found out what happened to him, and this arc would finally address his final fate. But it turned out to be a colossal shitshow, in part because 17 is mind-controlled the entire time, so we never find out what he wants, or what he’s been up to all these years. Instead, we just get two versions of him, and one of them hypnotizes 18 for no obvious reason, and the other one fights Vegeta in a weak, watered-down brawl. If anyone liked 17 enough to be excited about this arc, Episode 43 has made sure to punish them for their enthusiasm.

Meanwhile, Goten, Trunks, and Uub are still zapping Saibamen, literally repeating shots of them zapping Saibamen earlier in the episode. And Gohan is still fighting General Rildo, and not much is happening there.

And Goku’s frozen. Good times.

✨Positivity Page✨

Perhaps the one decent shot in this episode is this one where Vegeta watches Hell Fighter 17 surrounded by flames. He doesn’t look much like Vegeta, but at least he looks very handsome and cool. It’s like he bribed the animation director to make him look good for one shot.

✨Is this episode worse than “The Roaming Lake”?✨

Hell damn yes it’s worse than “The Roaming Lake”. That episode was really pleasant to look at. Not like this garbage dump.

The only real question is whether Episode 43 is the worst episode of GT. That’s a tough call, because it has to compete with the Para Bros. and Doltaki. But Episode 43 definitely has a safe spot in the Bottom Five.

✨The Blade Braxton Memorial Haiku*✨

Hells Pilgrimage stop

Number 5: Hell of watching

GT 43.

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