#english is being mean to me again

[cringefail-clown]

hear me out, but i dont think alt!calliope is that much concerned about canonicity of the story all that much. theres some deeper motive going on here

when john defeats lord english (and gets promptly unsubscribed from life, since his narrative purpose is completed) and davepeta hurls him into the black hole, on the other side in candyverse alt!calliope waits for him to appear and, when he does, devours him to gain the power-up needed to escape the timeline and goes on a hunt for ult dirk to stop him from starting another sburb session

and this is where lord english storyline should be put to rest, but its not as simple as that. this dudes like a cockroach, you just cant get rid of him, he just doesnt disappear, hes always there no matter what, looming over the narrative. and, now thats he was absorbed into alt!calliope, whats left of him? his masterpiece self now residing inside ult dirk

and dirk always had a close connection to caliborn - cal liked dirk the most from all the alpha kids, chatting with him regularly, hal - dirks splinter - became a part of cal and also doc scratch, who was also the host that brough lord english into the universe after beta kids created the green sun (which he also manipulated them into)

basically what im trying to say, dirk wanting to start another sburb session isnt really about maintaining their connection to canon, but it also is about it. caliborn lords over the alpha timeline, and is intrinsically tied to the canon. hes always there, hes already there, and he will always come back. and dirk is narratively tied to the one guy that was responsible with brining him into the story. excellent host, you might say

the point of starting another session is ultimately to bring caliborn back to life, and this is the goal of ult dirk, as the one whos carrying the last splinter of his soul. and thats why alt!calliope is so focused on stopping him. its all about the powerstruggle between the two cherubs, once again

(would also like to point out that rose got fooled twice into bringing lord english into the narrative - once through doc scratch manipulating her into believing deploying the tumor would destroy the green sun, and now through dirk manipulating her into believing starting another session will stop the timeline from deteriorating. girl cannot catch a break jesus)

tldr ult dirk is acting as another doc scratch, and the goal is to revive lord english

but tHATS JUST A THEORY-

#homestuck beyond canon #homestuck meta #dirk strider #ult dirk #lord english #caliborn #calliope #alt calliope #long post #considering what happens to doc in canon... this doesnt bode well for dirk huh #will his head explode again #the hemoanarchist post about lord english being a splinter of dirk only further solidified this to me #maybe ill be proven wrong but i mean. the evidence is there isnt it

[kaladinkholins]

i know I've mentioned my interpretation of mizu's gender a million times on here but i don't think i ever fully elaborated on it.

so on that note i just wanna ramble about that for a bit. basically, it's my reading of the show that mizu is nonbinary, so let me dig into that.

putting the rest under the cut because it ended being pretty long lol. also here have a cute mizu pic of her being happy and most at ease with herself, symbolised by her letting her hair down. <3 ok let's proceed.

okay note that nonbinary is an umbrella term, and applies to a vast range of gender identities, but it's my personal preference to use it as is, simply because i'm not a fan of microlabels. more power to you if you are though, but anyway.

essentially when i refer to mizu as nonbinary it means that i interpret mizu as a woman, but not ONLY a woman. not strictly a woman. she is also a man. she is also neither of these things, she is something in between, while at the same time she is none of these at all. i've said as much many times, but i just don't want people to think that by nonbinary it inherently means a "third androgynous gender" that essentially turns the gender binary into a gender trinary. not only is that going against what the term nonbinary was crafted for (to go against rigid boxes and categorisation of gender identities), but also, not all nonbinary people fall under that category or definition, and that's definitely not the way i interpret mizu.

also, before anyone fights me on this, let me clarify further that gender means something different to everyone. it's not your biological sex or physical characteristics. but at the same time, gender is not mere presentation. you can be a trans woman and still present masculine—either because you're closeted and forced to, or because you just want to—and either way, that doesn't take away from your identity as a woman. same goes for trans men. if you're a trans man but you wear skirts and don't bind or don't get top surgery, that doesn't make you any less of a man. because gender non-conformity exists, and does not only apply to cis people! some lesbians are nonbinary and prefer using he/him pronouns while dressing masculinely, but that doesn't mean they're a man, or that they're any less of a lesbian. neither does this mean that they're a cis woman.

the thing about queer identities in general is that, like i said, they mean something different to everyone, because how you identify—regardless of your biological attributes and fashion or pronouns—is an extremely personal experience. so a nonbinary person and a gnc cis woman's experiences might have plenty of overlap, but what distinguishes between the two is up to the individual. there's no set requirements to distinguish you as one or the other, but it's up to you to decide what you identify as, based on what you feel. either way, by simply identifying yourself as anything under the LGBTQ+ umbrella, you are already communicating to the world that you are not what a conservative, cisheteronormative society wants you to be.

which is why i find all this queer infighting on labels to be so ridiculous. because we're all fighting the same fight; the common enemy is a societal structure that divides us into set roles and expectations purely based on our biological parts. that's why biological essentialism in the queer community is a fucking disease. because by arguing that women are inherently weak and fragile and soft and gentle and must be protected from evil ugly men, while men are inherently strong and angry and violent and exploitative of women, these people are advocating for the same fucked up system that marginalises and abuses women as well as effeminate and/or gay men.

anyway. i'm going on a tangent. this was meant to be a blue eye samurai post. so yeah back to that— the point i'm trying to make is that there's no one way to identify as anything, and everyone views gender in a specific way.

so with that being said, yes you can definitely interpret mizu as a gnc cis woman and that's a totally valid reading. however, interpreting her as nonbinary or transmasc also doesn't take away from her experiences with misogyny and female oppression, because nonbinary and transmasc folks also experience these things.

me, personally, i view her as nonbinary but not necessarily or always transmasc because i still believe femininity and womanhood is an inherent part of who mizu is. for example, from what we've seen, she does not like binding. it does not give her gender euphoria, but is instead very uncomfortable for her both physically and mentally, and represents her suppressing her true self. which is why when she "invites the whole" of herself, she stands completely bare in front of the fire, breasts unbound and hair untied. when she is on the ship heading to a new land in the ending scene, she is no longer hiding her neck and the lack of an adam's apple. we can thus infer that mizu does not have body dysmorphia. she is, in fact, comfortable in her body, and relies on it extremely, because her body is a weapon. instead, what mizu hates about herself is her face—her blue eyes. she hates herself for her hybridised identity, hates herself for being a racial Other. hates that she has no home in her homeland. these are not queer or feminist themes, but postcolonial ones.*

* and as a tiny aside on this subject, i really do wish more of the fandom discussion would talk about this more. it's just such an essential part to reading her character. like someone who's read homi k bhabha's location of culture and has watched this show, PLEASE talk to me so we can ramble all about how the show is all about home and alienation from community. please. okay anyway—

nevertheless, queer and feminist themes (which are not mutually exclusive by the way!) are still prevalent in her story, though they are not the main issue that she is struggling with. but she does struggle with it to some extent, and we see this especially during her marriage with mikio, where we see her struggle in women's domestic spaces.

on the other hand, though, she finds no trouble or discomfort in being a man or being around other men—even naked ones—and does not seem stifled by living as one, does not seem all that bothered or uncomfortable navigating through men's spaces. contrast this to something like disney's mulan (1998), where we do see mulan struggle in navigating through men's spaces, as she feels uncomfortable being around so many men, always feeling like she doesn't belong and that she's inherently different from them. mizu has no such experiences like this, as her very personality and approach to life is what can be categorised as typically "masculine". she is straightforward and blunt. her first meeting with mikio, she tells him straight to his face that he's old while frowning and raising a brow at him. she approaches problems with her muscles and fists (or swords), rather than with her words or mind. compare this with mulan, who, while well-trained by the end of the movie, still uses her sharp wits rather than brute strength. this is a typically "feminine" approach. it's also the approach akemi relies on throughout the show—through her intelligence and persuasive tongue, she navigates the brothel with ease. mizu, in contrast to someone like mulan and akemi, struggles with womanhood and femininity, and feels detached from it.

thus, in my opinion, mizu is not simply a man, nor is she simply a woman. she is both. man and woman. masculine and feminine. she has to accept both, rather than suppress one or the other. her name means water. fluid.

as a side note, while i do believe mizu is nonbinary, i also primarily use she/her pronouns but this is a personal preference. i find it's easier, plus it's what the creators use, and because, in general, being nonbinary simply doesn't necessitate the use of they/them pronouns. nonbinary is not just a third gender. it's about breaking the binary, in any which way, and that's exactly what mizu does.

also, i'd also like to mention that one of show's head of story even referred to her with the term "nonbinary", rather than simply "androgynous" (see pic below). and it's possible this could be a slip up on his part, in which he believes the terms are interchangeable (they're not btw), but regardless i find it a very interesting word choice, and one that supports my stance.

so anyway yeah that's my incredibly long rambling post.

TL;DR nonbinary mizu rights 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 congrats if you reached the end of this btw. also ily. unless you're a TERF in which case fuck off. ok i'm done.

#mizu blue eye samurai #mizu bes #blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai meta #sorry if this is redundant btw i just cant stop thinking thoughts :3 #btw i am a mixed* southeast asian who is also nonbinary. just in case that's important context #by mixed* i mean i'm asian+asian but diff ethnicities lol. i dont have a white bone in my body god bless<3 #my whiteness is purely learned thru cultural osmosis + bcs my parents taught me english as a first language (boooo 🍅🍅🍅) #also i live in the global south so i think EYE know a thing or two about being gnc in a society of rigid awful gender roles‼️ #so likeee i think its ridiculous that its an either-or thing #mizu can be nonbinary while still being a woman of colour ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #also ummm as much as i love queer themes and gay people i wish people would talk more about the racial otherness / community aspect #as mentioned in the post above #you don't need to read bhabha's whole book btw but just take a look at some of his ideas and you'll get what im talking about #like the fact that the fandom mostly ignores those themes in the story makes me feel like :( :/ #cuz to me THATS the thing that spoke to me most and its a shame that its just not talked about enough #i mean i know why thats likely the case. but still. #whoops im rambling again 🤪 #fandom.rtf #shut up haydar #meta dissertations.pdf

[sisterdivinium]

Finding "the meaning" to a show that could have had up to five or seven seasons but was cancelled after the second is somewhat like trying to understand a novel composed of seventy chapters by having read only twenty — there is a whole wealth of information which we do not possess that could alter our reading of any given element or of the entire thing in itself.

Still, there are always patterns that weave a story into a cohesive unit and they can help us to better grope in darkness towards comprehension. One such pattern in Warrior Nun appears to be how the consequences to mistakes, "sins" or evil deeds committed by characters manifest.

Basic storytelling usually requires characters to act on something so that complications or resolutions may arise from their choices and move the plot forwards. In Warrior Nun, many of these actions are quite tragic in nature: Suzanne's arrogance and pride lead to the death of her Mother Superion; Vincent's allegiance to the higher power he believed Adriel to be inspired him to kill Shannon; Ava's flight from the Cat's Cradle ends up damning Lilith as she is mortally wounded and taken away by a tarask... All of these events have negative outcomes and heavy repercussions on all characters directly or indirectly involved. Something changes permanently because of them, be it in the world around them or within the characters themselves.

And yet, it would seem that all of these dark deeds not only move the story forwards but might also have overall positive results. We would have had no protagonist without Ava — and she would arguably never have received the halo to begin with had she not been murdered. What's more, on a personal scale, the horrifying crime she suffers is, in the end, the very thing that allows her a second chance in life, a new life.

An act of outside evil permits Ava to grow and develop, shows her a path she would not otherwise have found. Without her own season in some sort of hell, Lilith would not have been able to advance towards other ways of being and understanding beyond her very strict limitations. Vincent and Suzanne would not have embarked on their own journeys of enlightenment without having caused the pain they are responsible for.

Beatrice might have been paying for someone else's mistakes, but she, too, is given the chance to grow into herself through it. The afflictions that torment these characters advance the overall plot, but they also advance them, as individuals, as long as they are willing to learn and keep going despite the calamities large and small that they are faced with. Beatrice keeps going after parental rejection, Mary keeps going after losing Shannon, Jillian keeps going after losing her son (in part through her own actions, adding insult to injury)... Trouble and the adaptation that follows it, if one is open enough to learn from the experience, motivates the characters, propels them forward, teaches them.

The problem of evil has occupied the minds of many a thinker throughout the ages, given how the very existence of it, evil, might call into question that of God (a good, omniscient, omnipotent one, anyway). A common way of justifying suffering (and also God), then, is by claiming, as Saint Augustine, that "God judged it better to bring good out of evil than not to permit any evil to exist".

Now, it would be rather ridiculous to say of Warrior Nun that it follows in Leibniz's footsteps, also because this philosopher, expanding on the augustinian concept, attempted to defend the goodness of a real God with his "best of all possible worlds" while all we have is... Well, whatever/whoever Reya is.

But there seems to be an inclination towards some sort of optimism as a worldview nonetheless.

Betrayals reveal truth and grant knowledge (Vincent's culminates with the coming of Adriel, which allows us to know of the threat of a "Holy War" and thus prepare for it; Kristian's gives Jillian much needed insight, William's lights up the fuse for the fight to be taken more seriously...), crimes committed willingly or not open the way for Ava (Suzanne's killing of her Mother Superion causes the loss of the halo, which is transferred to Shannon, whose death opens the gates for Ava to walk through after being herself murdered by sister Frances)... The magnitude of these positive outcomes is perhaps not "balanced" when compared to the evil that brings them about, but there is still something to take out of the catastrophe.

However tragic the tones of a given event, the show itself appears to shun the predetermination that makes tragedy as a genre; if everything is connected, here it at least appears to not necessarily drag everyone into their horrible dooms.

What's more is that this lurking "optimism" matches really well with our own protagonist's personality.

And it makes perfect sense that Ava would do the best she could with whatever she is given.

Life for her, in the conditions she experienced after the accident, would have been unbearable without some sort of positive outlook on life. However deadpan, the joking and the "obscene gestures" and whatever other forms of goofing around beside Diego are a way of turning a portion of the situation in her own favour. Proverbial eggs have, after all, already been broken right and left — might as well make an omelette of whatever remains.

Humour is just another way of looking at the bright side of something, or, at the every least, of mitigating the utter horror it might bring. If the show allows for moments of lightness, if it lets us laugh, if it takes us through a perilous voyage which still bears ripe, succulent fruit instead of the rot of pessimism and its necessary contempt for humanity, it is because Ava herself sees things in this way. It isn't gratuitous or naïve in this case, but a true survival strategy, especially as it is confronted with the morbidity of Catholicism.

Here is a religion that soothes its faithful with the promise of reward in the afterlife — how else does one charge into battle against the unknown, risking one's own death along with that of one's sisters, without the balm of believing that we shall all meet again eventually, "in this life or the next"? How else does one come to terms with the ugliness and the pain of this existence if not by looking forward to a paradise perfect enough to make all trials and tribulations here worth it?

True nihilism would have annihilated Ava. Her present perspective is what avoided the abyss.

And there is nothing Panglossian to her attitude or what the show might imply by giving us her view on things. This isn't about "the best of all possible worlds", but of making the best of whatever situation we're in, of taking what we have and doing something with it, something good, something of ourselves. It isn't God making good out of evil, but our choices.

Killing innocent people and feeling no remorse will never be the best someone can aspire to do. Sister Frances, cardinal William, Adriel all learn this the hard way.

Those who do their best find that, somehow, they can move on from whatever it was that paralysed them. Ava, most of all, knows what it is to be stuck, frozen in place; she can never be the character who refuses to grow, even through pain, lest she condemns her spirit to the same fate her body is all too familiarised with. Those around her wise enough to let themselves be touched by her, by the dynamic power she carries, walk forth with her and live.

It says very little about "God" that Warrior Nun should adopt its heroine's views and seem "optimistic" as it progresses — but it speaks volumes about the values it presents for pondering, of the inspiration its protagonists provide, and of the multiple reasons why this is a story unlike most others.

#warrior nun #ava silva #you know it's actually very funny to type this as someone who is very schopenhaurian with hints of nietzsche #but i AM doing the best i can too :) #again i will reiterate that i don't think this apparent optimism has anything to do with the classic theodicy #if anything i see it more as a cry in favour of antitheism -- this is YOUR life fuck god #life is shitty so carve out your own makeshift paradise out of the wreck you are given #and don't make things harder for anyone else in the process if you can avoid it #(but that might just be the luciferian in me speaking lol) #anywho this post is a translation of one i wrote not too long ago in cryptic english and a ton of tags #so if it seems familiar that's why #also i do find it rather telling that whenever i try to delve into how the show structures things i talk about ava #i don't set out to analyse her -- but in analysing the show i must analyse her as well if by the edges #which again points to how finely woven she is to the fabric of the entire thing #remember how i said ava is a representation of free will? #well this whole bringing good out of evil thing also touches upon it #saint augustine maintains that it is precisely free will that allows us to do it -- to choose good #of course he means it in a sense of being free to pursue god rather than evil but you see the parallel still works #(this is the post i mentioned in the last reblog. figured i'd go ahead and throw it in the wild since there are more brewing) #analysis and similar #exercises in observation

[morethanwonderful]

God do you ever think about how the world of darkness and violence, especially but not exclusively Will's darkness and violence, is represented by water throughout Hannibal? How when Will is at his most feverish and almost kills Abel Gideon in s1, he's constantly hallucinating water flowing from places? How he dreams of a glacier breaking? How he imagines his prison sink overflowing with blood when he tries to have Hannibal murdered? How Bedelia lays in the bath and imagines herself submerged when she's with Hannibal in Italy? How Will's final and most honest act is to plunge himself and Hannibal headfirst into the ocean together?

Water (and sometimes great amounts of blood in the place of water) is darkness and violence. It's Hannibal's world. It's the overflowing desire to harm. It's also, in its representation of violence, Will's true self and true desire for that violence. And he throws himself into it when he takes Hannibal in his arms after killing Dolarhyde.

But more than that, for his entire life, Will's place of safety has been boats. Never far from the water, but never into it. Always floating along just on the surface—that was Will Graham's safe place and his world before he met Hannibal.

#full disclosure I'm digging back through the archives of this blog rn to check some stuff wrt tagging #which means I ended up being reminded of another REALLY good meta post on this subject #and it makes me feel so insane every time I think about it #GOD what a good show #I gotta rewatch again. my god #hannibal #will graham #will graham my beloved #hannibalposting #nbc hannibal #english major hours

[capfalcon]

btw media literacy is not the same thing as english class and i am please begging people to read more about media literacy because it is so far from english class, signed sincerly someone with a degree in media studies

#media is MEDIA #and media literacy by definition is not about #pulling meaning from literature/written word #media is tv entertainment advertising etc #music too #media is MEDIA once again. it is not fucking literature #and media literacy is not just understanding what you read. it is about #being able to parse and filter and analyze IN REAL TIME because you have done the prior work in #recognizing where media comes from the global forces at play the social forces and cultural background that relates #media literacy is so far from english class that it actually hurts me #and media literacy as well is about action! #its about fighting back against untruths and seeing what the truth really is #and by saying its the same as media literacy thats just. wrong #like. saying media literacy is the same as english class actually makes my blood boil #media literacy is a very specific term with a very specific definition. and im not shitting on the person who made that post #but i would go so far as to say its entirely inaccurate. #they are not the same and they are not comparable and acting like they are #makes the world LESS media literate. #jordan rants

[todayisafridaynight]

it’s actually kinda crazy how the rggo stories are real lol genuinely felt like i was reading fanfiction. They 100% had a minedai shipper hiding among the rggo writers

iirc one of the writers for rggo was. Not To Say A Minedai Shipper HOWEVER he was pretty earnest about how good together daigo and mine were so ..... not too far from the truth me thinks .....

#snap chats #im doing lawyer speak where i dont present things as hard truth lest i get a lawsuit (read: getting corrected) #but im like 90% confident something along those lines is real and canon to rgg's staff. allegedly of course #it really is so unfortunate rgg didnt go an official english release for rggo but i also get it but still .. unlucky .... #it just makes the rggo stories feel like some type of iceberg trivia yk what i mean #or like something you turn to for a vague fun fact from a fan magazine from 2007 yk what im sayin. onea those typea things #like guys i promise this isnt an obscure fact. relatively. technically ???? #its just locked behind this mobile game that doesnt even do character stories anymore. i think. i dont think they do chara stories anymore #they do event stories stlil im pretttyyyyyy sure ?? again 70% confident please dont sue me #but yeah anyway. will we ever get the rggo stories to have an official english release or acknowledgement Shrug #for now they'll be somethin fun to turn to when we get bored. or when we're- as my beste puts it- being menty at 2AM

[sysig]

Last man standing (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #ZEX #It's lonely at the top :( #Poor dearest is worse for wear ah </3 #This scene made me cry ;; #Like it was sad when he wrote down his missing canonmates but going back in and writing everyone else's names ;;;; #Even his shaky alliances! Even the people he hasn't seen for a while!! Wehhh <3 <3 <3 #You soft heart ;; I see you Admiral ♥ #Also had a lot of fun writing in VUK ZIX again hehe ♪ #The translations from VUK ZIX to English aren't exact - for starters they're upside down haha #So if you started from the top down it would actually read KINLEZ NATPAK but I figured that wouldn't be as readable #You read from the bottom up! I also still headcanon it being written/read from left to right #So he started with Zelnick then Fwiffo then Tanaka and so on #Although I did change it up for the second one - Teisel then Xelloss then Xigbar then Asch and Van #The more I think of it the more I'm surprised there's no H :0 #Even just as a demarcation of a pause before during or after a syllable #The ''sh'' sound makes complete sense tho hehe <3 #Any incorrect shaping of letters/poor handwriting on my part can totally be chalked up to ZEX not being used to human hands! #Totallyyy lol #I really like the way specific syllables are shaped - like how Teisel and Zelnick almost share the same shaped between ''SEL'' and ''ZEL'' #How Z is a more connected extension of S just agh it's so pretty <3 <3 Eco_Mono really did such a lovely job with it ♪ #And then certain ''incorrectly'' spelled syllables still turned out so pretty! Like the ''ANA'' in Talana - look how swoopy and continuous! #The ''BAR'' in Xigbar looks really cool - honestly reminds me of the fanweapons I made ages ago for I? think? Xigbar's apprentice?? #It's been too long I don't remember now lol but it's cool to me in particular because of that!! :D #Fwiffo looks so funny haha - Tanaka has a cool star-like kind of letter in his name?? Man it's just so neat <3 #As for ZEX - I mean he made it this far :( Not one to give up easily that's for certain ♥ Tenacious #I want him to be happy :'0

[kittycowboy]

Jamaican patois my beloved U are suxh a helpful referwnce

#ITS SUCH AN INTERRSTING LANGUAGE TOO the number of other languahe influences is crazy #i wld LOVEEE to know more abt hlhow the grammer and vocab is effected bt them #it more or less uses english as a base #but words like me/my/I/etc. are all simplified to “mi” (I THINK) rather than having multiple versions #would be interested if thats how west african languages work or if thats jusy a product of it being a creole #the participles are so interesting too #the function to cobjugate verbs but work entirly differently than that of english #i wonder again if thats an infkuence of west african languages #then there are paticiples like “fi” which have a TON of different uses where english ones tend to only have one #it expresses posession or obligation. it can be used as “for” in some cases. so cool #I mentioned this with “mi” but often the pronouns dont have much change between like. position #i forgot the word. I mean like “He” and “Him” are the same word (im) #“they” “them” and “their” are all the same too (dem) #theres also a plural you which I always enjoy #it has a lot of notabke similarities to spanish esp. jn the different “to be” verbs #which is cool bcs I wld usually thnk it wld be omitted from a pidgin and creole #it does have spanisha and portuguese jnfkuence but considering its mainly english and west african languages it makes me wonder if #WA languages also have that equative abd locative “to be” verb

[lizzydizzyyo]

So fucking sad that David Archuleta put his life on pause for some stupid missionary period taking two years when his career was literally shooting up (eventually killing it until it sizzled out), not to mention doing a whole PR manouver when he was "caught" in a gay bar from a grainy cctv screenshot (which is not a bad thing btw) but he ended up becoming a public queer ex-mormon anyway. All that effort and bullshit. Man. Imagine if he went ahead with his career in 2012-2014 instead, he might even come out earlier because 2013 was literally the gay coming out year. Can you imagine. Can you imagine how spoiled we would have been as an archie if he did that instead. CAN YOU IMAGINE.

#david archuleta #me #god sometimes i just wanna fucking bawl out so bad for him he got is sooooo good back then #i still listen to his new music but like it's just not hitting the same #he was literally my biggest music motivation until i started learning piano and writing my own songs more professionally #biggest motivation to learn english too bc he also vlogged back then #he was such a big BIG part of my life and i still have the deluxe versions of his first two albums #i mean maybe it's fate because this is when i pivoted to loving dan and phil but still #idk man all the things that could have been with this man #i even still read his autobiography chords of strength sometimes #anyway if you can't tell yes I'm listening The Other Side of Down on repeat now #and having so many feelings about it #i still have dream of being able to see him live but i mean come on there is no way he can ever tour internationally again

[heloflor]

It just hit me that we're getting a game where the main protagonist is called "Peach" and the main antagonist is called "Grape".

Is...is that why Nintendo called her that ? Because fruit ?

(Granted it probably sounds better in Japanese if that's her name there as well)

#Super Mario #Nintendo Direct #Princess Peach Showtime #Flor talks #I mean 'grape' definitely isn't the kind of name I was expecting out of a villain #but then again with that logic 'peach' isn't that smart of a name either; we just got used to this being her name #(btw I'm not english so have no issue having a character named 'Peach'; but if her name was 'Pêche' it would weird me the f out) #(all this to say the name 'Grape' actually doesn't sound bad to me; but I can understand why english-speaking people are weirded out by it #hence also mentioning how Japanese people won't find it strange if it's the same name overseas) #(my only issue with it is that it doesn't sound like a villain name) #also unrelated but I AM SO EXCITED FOR THAT GAME HOLY SHIT !!!!! #and again I am so SO glad Nintendo is keeping Peach's actual personality instead of whatever the movie was trying to do with her #like I love small details such as her cowering a bit when Stella goes on her hair; like yes Peach is going to save people #but she's still being herself doing so

[raayllum]

Gosh yes, your tags on that last post. Like, I don’t blame people for liking Viren, for enjoying his character, for finding him sympathetic (or attractive, even if I personally don’t). He’s a compellingly written character! But don’t be offended if people hate him or find him evil… he’s the villain, that’s literally his role in the story

"How dare this villainous character do villainous things" / "how dare the protagonist get narratively rewarded for making good choices" like do y'all even hear yourselves sometimes, y'know?

especially when - and i cannot stress this enough - tdp is for children and will ultimately have a happy ending. this isn't a grown up drama or tragedy or even a grimdark fantasy by any means. it's a hopepunk high fantasy story. people who further retaliation and violence and push people into inherently defensive positions are the 'bad guys'

like i love viren! i think he's very well written and interesting. he's a great examination of how we can lie to and martyr ourselves in a search for security that is also about status & wanting to feel special, about the harm done when trying to win a rigged system rather than solidarity in tearing a system down and making a new one. i appreciate his dry/deadpan sense of humour. he's also one of two primary antagonists in the first 3 seasons. and like, all that can coexist? it's multifaceted character writing? we all presumably passed grade 10 english class?

i also cannot emphasize the importance of being able to separate audience reaction or response from what a piece of art is actually doing or saying enough. "this story is bad because it was personally upsetting to me" without examples given or analyzed it is not well, analysis, it's just a currently very unfounded opinion. and sometimes stories are supposed to be personally upsetting, so like. you also gotta know your lanes

it's why subjective analysis is very useful but learning structural (objective) analysis is arguably more important. something can be structurally pretty weak but very enjoyable (frozen). something can be abysmal enjoyment wise but very structurally solid (1984, which i'd argue isn't meant to be enjoyed, either). and it's important to know the difference if you want to write actual analysis rather than opinion based stuff. analysis isn't necessarily better than opinion based pieces but analysis is more expansive because it can cover the subjectivity and the objectivity and more. which is precisely why i can read "the iliad" and think "wow that was good" but if i wanted to write an essay on it i'd have to do a lot more thinking because i'm demanding something greater of that artistic experience by virtue of wanting to expand on it

a lot of people take "art for art's sake" as a statement regarding the fact that art - which is inherently symbolic in its construction, even in what meaning we construe to words themselves - doesn't have to mean anything and fighting back claims that art should mean something. but i think of "art for art's sake" is more worthwhile to examine under the lens of "this art doesn't exist for the sake of capitalist consumption, but amid it, or sometimes precisely in spite of it" and like. very few things artistically have zero meaning precisely because meaning is also "what was the reasoning behind this" and if there is none (think a tattoo you got "just because") that's typically a subjective reflection of the creator and still indicative of their personality. sometimes the meaning is meaninglessness (nihilism is still a creation in response to us searching for meaning, after all)

i'm getting into the weeds now but the point is that there's definitely been an upswing in recent years of people thinking opinions = analysis and while that often is the case (particularly if that opinion is expanded upon enough to be grounded in the text and the text's context) it absolutely is not as often actual analysis as people think it is

#the english major strikes again #thanks for asking #i was in the atla fandom casually from 2013 to 2016 and when i say Head Empty fandom dear g o d #and ppl get very butthurty about it y'know? which i think stems from a general anti intellectualism #bc who needs the fucking humanities and History in times of crisis am i right #but like. legitimate experts in their fields do know more than 16 yr olds online who think #the curtains aren't blue for any particular reason #like to engage with a text you have to operate under the assumption that Everything has meaning and then #parse out the patterns and then debate what meanings are being ascribed #how they may be integrated interpreted or completely unintentional b the author but still very much ther #tag ramble #anonymous #i feel like ppl very much shield themselves with their own perceived intellectualism and #i know so many ppl who are significantly smarter than me and i fucking love it bc i get to learn #it's not a threat it's an opportunity #what's that one socrates quote??? 'the first step to knowing is knowing you know nothing' #or something along those lines

[indi-glo-archive]

one thing i've noticed lately that I don't think I can talk about on my actual fandom sideblog (yet) is the fact that i'm just having a fundamentally different fandom experience to what I think the majority of people in fandom are

A lot of people focus on shipping over everything else. Like, "I don't care about realism or good plot or character consistency or anything that really makes a show good, I just want my two faves to kiss" levels of focusing on shipping. It's like instead of caring about the actual show or even those actual characters, they choose to focus on their relationship instead.

A couple examples of this are the 9-1-1 drama that's going on rn. I don't watch that show but from what I've seen it's a great example of this. and, imo, people's opinions on Simon/Daphne from Bridgerton s1 are heavily influenced by wanting the ship over anything else. I think Simon's reasoning for not wanting children is perfectly ok reasoning to have. If he doesn't want to have kids or get married to spite his dad, if he chooses to ignore love to avoid those things, then that's his choice! It's not pathetic or goofy or negative at all for him to make a choice and stick to it, and it certainly isn't something he needs to get corrective SA'd about unless you just want to see him and Daphne fuck and you care more about that than them as characters.

idk. it makes fandom feel really shallow for me, someone who enjoys meta with depth and nuance more than mindless shipping at any cost. I already knew the overwhelming bigotry made it pretty shallow, but the shipping-only mindset adds another level to it. It's just not something I personally enjoy very much

#i shouldn't be in the club. i should be in english academia #i had so much fun in my one college english class. but i don't think i'm gonna switch majors about this though. it's not that deep #anyways! i don't think this is everyone. i mean i had a decent enough following as indi-glo #and that was while shitting on people. not even doing meta people wouldn't consider as controversial #but i think it's common enough in the fandoms i'm in that it's hard to find people who aren't like that. which isn't super fun for me #it means i can't talk about a lot of things i find interesting if i don't want a repeat of indi-glo levels of hate #i'm not in the mood to be mass blocked in a fandom again. but the threshold of things you have to do to be mass blocked in a fandom #is actually so low. which adds to me being bored bc i can't talk about a lot of the things i want to talk about #also to be clear this isn't me going on the fandom site and complaining that there's fandom on it #i'm not upset about the existence of fandom. i'm 'in' multiple fandoms. i just don't like how fandom operates #i do get that most people aren't here to form english academia essay worthy opinions on fuckin heartstopper though. i get that #i do wish ppl were more open-minded when people have more nuanced opinions about the show/characters #that happen to go against their ship or w/e. but i get it i guess

[always-a-joyful-note]

Okay but in honour of Artistic Partisan being released on engstars, I'm going to be very self-indulgent and talk about how Hell Screen (source) coded it is. And yes I'm talking about Akutagawa Ryunosuke's short story about the (spoilers to come) painter obsessed with art and his beloved daughter who got sacrificed in all sorts of ways (then died) in order to inspire him to paint a scene of the Buddhist hell at the commission of his shady patron.

I mean, maybe it's just me but I think Artistic Partisan perfectly captures that line between obsessive creation and passionate artistry, flip flopping back and forth as the line "si vis artem, para bellum" (play on the latin "si vis parcem, para bellum" if you want art/peace, prepare for war) is chanted in the midst of it all. Like how could that not capture the artist's desire for eternity, longevity, beauty while also having the both threatening but invoking intense melody that gives it that edge of action and danger? It's so Hellscreen in the way that Hellscreen is a very bleak depiction of the battle that is art (with questionable beauty being produced but a definite masterpiece of expression regardless). Yes, the artist wants to live forever but, be warned, because the world of art is not one of peace. It is filled with blood and sacrifice and battles. Artistic Partisan is the warning song (but also a praise, almost, of art), Hellscreen is the story of the song ignored (but still proof of how war really does create art).

Just....man. They went hard on this one. If you want art, prepare for war indeed.

#i do have to say here that i dont really think that you ALWAYS need war to create art #just like you dont need war to have peace #but the sentiment remains #am i probably overanalysing an idol game? #yes.....but remember i come from the bsd/orv/link click fandoms so im not gonna stop.... #ALSO MORE SONGS NEED LATIN IN THEM #can you imagine all the kpop and jpop and cpop's english all replaced with one of the dead languages instead? #i would probably listen to more music if it had dead languages in it honestly #anyway im being insane again please forgive me #enstars #ensemble stars #fandom spamdom #stuff i say #poems and related #also i have to say thank you to bsd bibliophile for so many good japanese lit sources and links #but yeah....i went insane over the song first because of the latin then because short stories... #i mean i did say my nazuna-velveteen rabbit was only one of the literature comparisons i went feral over #if i have time there will probably be one more...or maybe more if i read more enstars stories rip some please help

[mycological-mariner]

Crying while reading The Flight of the Heron. Keith really is just out here calling Ewen “my Achilles” nine times in two pages

#not to mention! #‘MY warrior’ and other forms of the possessive #mother fucker??? #and then the book ACTUALLY PULLED the ‘only one bed thing’ like please #I seriously thought y’all were over exaggerating the homoerotic tension and you were WERENT #if anything it was downplayed! #’my Achilles’ stfu man #and his whole ‘I’m really going to miss him I hope we meet again one day but I’m sure he doesn’t feel the same’ #JESUS Mary and JOSEPH son! #and yeah do I get why he dipped? of course. it makes sense for the story and his character #doesn’t mean I have to like it lol #man really stole this man’s clothes and left a farewell note omfg #HE DIDNT EVEN BREAK PAROLE BUT HE STILL LEFT A GOODBYE NOTE #i hate this book #it’s making me feel emotions #and I KNOW they’re gonna meet again - it’s literally a trilogy of books #but omg that reunion is gonna hurt isn’t it #if I were ewen I would ABSOLUTELY be pissed and freaking out! ofc I’m thinking he’s gonna snitch on us to the English! #oooh it’s juicy. and keith being such a lil bitch rubbing on ewen to get a rise out of him and then immediately apologising #this reads like fan fic in the best ways possible #and now we have to go back to England UHG #I will keep everyone updated whether you like it or not. likely not but fuck it #I need to have a little scream about this book #anyways #flight of the heron

[tacobellebandit]

Having transient aphasia was scarier than when I first had a migraine with aura. When I went partially blind (because of the aura) I could google what was happening and feel reassured, but with the aphasia I couldn't even even put my symptoms into words to google it, much less read up about it (tho now I have after the fact ofc)

#luckily it was a short experience #I read a tumblr post and it was just incoherent to me #But after a couple posts including one that i had read and understood earlier in the day #I realized that /I/ was struggling with it and it wasn't the posts being written badly #Reading each individual word and trying so hard to focus on the meaning #But it was like i was reading something in completely incomprehensible broken english #That was an experience 😔 let's not have it again

[vocalsynthbdays]

hi um i was wondering if you could but my favorite vipper/utauloid on your list 👉👈 their name is Mochizuki Kei and they are themed around and released on Halloween

oh sure !! and thank you for the ask !!!

i was going ot post them last year, and if you look at my last years halloween post under the cut youll see me discussing them there iirc, however i didnt post them as i wasnt sure of how to refer to them , and what their creator is presenting them as and stuff ?

the utau wikia says that kei is just called a transphobic slur by their creator

and shows they rather be refered to with feminine terms

also the fact that they are specifically being described as "becoming" a cool beauty, rather than like, dressing as one, makes me think this is more permanent, like transitioning, rather than crossdressing

ive also had people say that the most accurate translation of the word used to describe their gender is just "trap", which absolutely is transphobic

i think a better translation of "otokonoko" is more like "crossdresser" though ?? calling a character who says they want to be refered to in feminie ways a crossdresser instead is transphobis either way though

which makes it seem like this is like, a transfem character being presented in a transphobic way by their creator to me ??

as such, as a trans person myself, i didnt want to uncritically post about a character who is seemingly being refered to in such a transphobic way without knowing more about them and being sure that what im writing is true

kei reads a bit like grell from black butler to me ig ASDHKJASHDK like, a character who is being called male but says theyre a woman and wants to be refered ot with feminie terms ?? i have no idea what words are used to dscribe grell in japanese though, im only bringing this up as have another example to compare kei to

i could totally be all wrong about this though ???? i know that japanese words for gender do not easily translate to english, as they come from a different culture and society, so the words used specifically within that culture and society need to be viewed within that context to fully make sense, if you get what i mean,, and ik that my views and knowledge of gender as a person living in the uk and being on the (largely american) english-speaking internet are going to be different to those of people living on the other side of the world to me, so i get that my interpretation of kei could be completely wrong

to me in my knowledge though, the fact they want to be refered to with feminine terms and want to "become" a cool beauty seems to be pretty indicitative of them just being transfem, rather than a crossdresser like their creator says

i really cannot be certain though, and i am completely open to being corrected by anyone who knows better, or can give anything on this topic !!

so since i have such doubts about kei, their gender, what to call them, and how they translate from japanese to english, i decided not to post about them ahskjdhjkasdh

tldr: i didnt post kei because to me they seem to be a transfem character being presented in a transphobic way, but i dont know japanese and cannot be sure that is the case, so i chose againt posting them

#ask #I HOPE THIS ALL MAKES SENSE ???? #its 2am so this might all just be nonesense bs #i hope its at least enough to explain my thought process at least #AND SORRY FOR THE MASSIVE WALL OF TEXT HAIKSHDJKASKLDJA #also !! i japanese there are different ways to say “I” like first person pronoun #and this can change depending on gender #and in kei character profile they go to call themself “boku” #a mascule word #then switch to “watashi” #a more feminine one #as far as im aware #however this cannot be translated into english #due to our ungendered “I” #and os has been switched to being in second person with “he” and “she” in the translation im shwoinh #this is also why im refering to kei with they them #as not only might i be wrong in reading them as transfem #if they are transfem taht doesnt mean they would use she her in english necesarrily #yea i hope this all makes sense !!!!! #again if anyone knows better than me please help #correct me on where im wrong or just bring forth better knowledge or anything #also even if kei is in fact being refered to in transphobic ways by their creator #ill still be posting them #i just want to have the information i need to be able to explain taht #also thank you for the ask !!!!!!!!! #gives me an excuse to go off about how i dont understand keis gender #and to cry for help from those who know better #looks up at you with my puppy dog eyes #meoww #please someone help me make sense of this