#he just gives off such daddy vibes tbh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

banquetwriter · 2 months

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୨୧ Brat ୨୧

pairing: Rick Grimes ♡︎ fem!Reader

warnings: ୭̥⋆*｡ use of daddy, one spank, dom/sun dynamic, multiple orgasms, pure filth tbh, reader acts helpless on purpose, brat tamer vibes

summary: ʚ Rick forgets your anniversary and he makes it up to you ɞ

Words: 2432

You had your arms crossed a pouty look on your face. Rick rolled his eyes slightly, standing behind you. “Darlin’ please I-I never meant to hurt you,” he said, sitting behind you.

One leg on either side of the picnic bench. His rough strong hands land on the sides of your arms. You let out a frustrated whine, moving forward away from his touch.

“Y/n I didn't realise what day it was I promise I didn't go on the run to hurt you. I just didn't know what day it was,” he said slowly pressing his body up against yours.

You were in the cutest of dresses, your hair done up decently nice (considering it was the apocalypse) even made some of that homemade makeup bullshit.

You look like the cutest most beautiful thing Rick has ever laid his eyes on ever. Had it been normal life and he forgot your anniversary, sure he wouldn't mind you being a brat about it.

But this wasn't normal life. Not everyone had access to a calendar anymore, and sure some people kept track but Rick didn't. And he sure as hell was surprised you did. He knew it was coming up.

It was that time of year again, the spring. “Come on y/n don't be such a brat,” he murmured in your ear. You turned away from his face still giving him the silent treatment.

He let out a deep sigh not having the time to fight with you. “Alright listen this is what we're gonna do. I'm gonna go out and pick up your gift and when I come back I expect you to have left that attitude somewhere else. Do you understand me?” he said in a stern voice.

His hands slightly tightened on your soft flesh. It sent a shiver up your spine and heat to your core. “Fine,” you muttered out. Moving away from him, standing up, and walking to your shared room.

Rick licked his lips, “Alright. I'll be back soon.” he muttered, gripping the door handle and leaving the house.

It wasn't until a few hours later that Rick showed back up in the house you both called home. Slicked back hair, a new shirt, some new lingerie, and a bundle of flowers. He strained his back and walked down the hall.

He looked into your room to see you reading a book lying on your stomach. He lifts the hand holding the flowers up and uses his knuckle to knock on the open door.

You turned around greeting him with a much happier-looking face. You set the book on the nightstand and turned around slightly. You slowly bite your lips looking at your new gifts.

“Well hey there pretty girl,” he says setting the flowers and gifts down on the other nightstand. You let out a small chuckle, letting him crawl into the bed basically on top of you.

“How are you? Less bratty now? Yeah?” he mumbled moving a piece of hair out of your face. You nod with a simple pretty smile that could send Rick down to his knees. He cups the right side of your face leaning down to kiss you on your forehead.

He leans back up eyeing your figure in the tight-fitting dress. You feel your cheeks begin to warm under his gaze. His hand slides down to your lips parting them slightly.

He brushes them slightly sending heat waves to your core. “So beautiful…” Rick whispers looking at your face. His hand slides down further to your jaw, turning your head right and left.

“Sit up on the pillows.” your husband murmurs, moving off the bed completely. You obey scooting up to your pillows and sitting, letting your legs fall open slightly.

Rick stands on the edge of the foot of the bed, hands placed on each end of the bed looking down at you. His eyes were dominantly dark, you wanted to squirm under his gaze.

Rick stands back up tall shedding his shirt off. You rake in his form. God, he was beautiful. Scars littered his chest, and a good patch of hair as well as his happy trail led to the thing you wanted in you most.

“You ready? You want this?” he asks looking at you, a deep look of love in his eyes. You knew that if you said yes this would be the last time you would see that look for hours. Complete domination of a man would overtake him.

And you wanted nothing more than that.

“Yes…daddy” you murmur with a smug grin. He cocks his head to the right slightly. He grabs the comforter of the bed shaking your entire body with a swift move. You let out a gasp.

Rick grabs your hips and thighs and drags you down flush to his body. Feeling a small bulge growing in his pants. You try and wiggle out of his touch, squirming left and right.

Ricks's hand comes down on your hands and arms, “Quit moving brat.” he whispers in a deeply threatening tone. You give him a pout of sadness but you're so turned on.

You felt your sex start leaking with arousal. Letting out a whine of protest lets Rick know that you're far from done being bratty. He leans down kissing and teasing your neck.

His rough lips moved up and down your sensitive skin, nibbling on your jaw slightly. The flat of his tongue dragged up. You moan out trying to buck your hips into him.

His left hand slams down on your hips keeping you in place. “Rick!” you whine out trying to tease him more. He pulls away from your neck and shifts his knee in between your legs putting it right on your unclothed heat.

After Rick left for your gifts you thought it would be a good idea to go completely commando. You realize that it's gonna give you a lot more trouble than it might have been worth.

Rick's knee pressing evenly on your clit wasn't exactly what you needed or wanted but it sure as hell wasn't nothing. Your count began drooling all over him as he moved his hand off your hip and above your head stabilizing himself to bring his left hand to your jaw and neck.

His fingers slip around the sides of your neck squeezing it. You let slip another moan this one getting trapped in his mouth as he leans down kissing you roughly.

His dick straining heavily in his pants at the sight and sounds of you. God, you were a beautiful soul. It was like your body was hand-carved for him. He hoped only to bring you an ounce of the pleasure you gave him daily.

“Rick please…” and you whine out, his teeth clashing against his. Maybe being a brat wasn't such a good idea. You couldn't help it. You wanted all of his attention to yourself. A mean and rough man to take care of you.

Ricks's hand leaves your neck and lands on your face in a smack. You whine, pressing down on his knee, feeling a small wave of pleasure.

Your husband sits up, pushing your dress up to your stomach. Revealing your bare cunt leaking on his pants. “Oh what a poor little brat,” he says, fingers slowly moving to your cunt. He gingerly spreads it open revealing just how wet you were.

“This what's been troubling you?” he asks sticking one of his digits into your sopping arousal. “Mhm!” you nod eagerly. “That's what's been making you such a little bratty girl? Just a needy cunt?” he says in such a mocking tone.

“God no wonder you've been all bratty huh? Needed some good loving didn't you?” he whispers.

His rough voice plus his small ministrations were slowly filling your body with warmth and tingles. “M sorry Daddy,” you admit, trying to grind down on his finger. “Baby girl, why didn't you use your big girl voice and tell me huh? You know I'm always willing to help you right?” he says slipping a second finger in, starting to move even faster.

His thumb presses on your clit starting to rub just how you like it. “M said I was sorry Daddy! You forgot about me n I just wanted you!” you whined. “I know baby I know,” he says keeping his pass, rubbing harder on your sensitive button.

You felt the familiar feeling in your tummy pool, a coil waiting to snap. It felt like pleasure was in your bones, deep-seated love planted by your husband. “You feel so good, m gonna cum.” you whimper letting the pleasure slowly start to take over.

“Good girl, come on baby,” Rick says leaning down again and kissing up and down your neck/ jaw. The coil was threatening to snap, as his fingers pumped in and out, curling to your G spot.

“Oh my god.” you breathe out. Your back arches as your cunt clenches on his fingers. Tingling waves of heat tracked through your whole body.

Your visions dimmed and faded out for a few moments when your breath returned to a more normal pace. By the time you noticed, you felt Ricks's tongue slowly licking up your leaking juices.

“Poor thing, well that's all she needed huh?” he teased you, hands gripping your thighs. You moaned as he barely let your sensitive cunt recover.

His warm tongue moved and curled to your G spot as he moved a hand to finish rubbing your clit. You moaned his name like it was a prayer. Begging to keep going. Your second orgasm came quicker than the first one, between the lewd sounds of Rick eating you out like you were his last meal and his death grip on you; you didn't last long.

You grabbed the sheets, as you started to grind down on his face trying to feel every inch of him possible. “M gonna cum again, please,” you begged, again feeling your body teetering on the edge.

He pulls away keeping his moving fingers on your clit. “Do it. Do it for me,” he says, his words vibrating into your greedy cunt. “Mm, fuck.” you whined. You were sure your poor neighbors were going to complain.

Your orgasm washes over you, feeling your legs shake with the sheer force of your husband's desire. He slowly stopped his movements, pulling away.

His face is covered in your liquid, his hair sleek with a shine from sweat. You looked up at him, body on fire as your breathing returned to normal.

“You alright there y/n?” he asks looking at your almost dazed sight. You nodded ‘yes’ watching as he slowly undid his belt. Letting his pants fall seeing his, what must be a painfully hard erection.

He pulls his boxers down, his dick slapping his stomach once it sprang back up. Your eyes flutter a little looking at his being cock. It was so perfect, almost made for you it seemed.

“Sit up, take your dress off the rest of the way,” he says pumping his cock a few times to get it ready for your needy cunt. You giggle as you follow his directions. Sitting up removing the dress.

You toss it on the floor next to you. Eyeing up your husband, licking your lips slightly taking in the sight of his naked and erect body. You let your legs fall open, revealing your most intimate part of yourself to him.

“Get over here” he barks once again grabbing your hips and pulling you flush against him. You giggle looking up at him, “Oh you think something is funny huh?” he asks, pumping his needy cock with his hand.

“Mm nooooo..” you giggle out biting your fingernail. “S’ what I thought,” he says, grabbing your hand and putting it on your clit instructing you to rub. You obey as you prepare yourself for his cock.

He brings the tip up to your entrance, moving in slightly. Feeling his tip press into you. You gasp in the slight stinging sensation it brings, taking your hand off your body and gripping the sheets.

“I know honey, I know. Just hold tight for a second ok? Almost all the way in.” he says continuing his plummet into your body. You nod angling your hips so he can slide into the deepest part of you.

He makes it all the way in as you both moan out for each other. “Fuck.” he mutters, once again moving your hand back down to have you rub your clit.

He begins pumping in and out of you, slowly of course at first. Feeling your pleasure return for your third orgasm. “Rick,” you whimper out bringing your unoccupied hand to his hair. He follows suit plunging his hand into your hair, mouth roughly kissing you.

His body was flushed with red, as he pumped inside of you slowly coming to his own end of pleasure. You couldn't take it anymore letting your orgasm cleanse through you like a prayer. Your back arched, cunt squeezing him perfectly.

Rick closed his eyes pulling away from your mouth and letting his head rest on your neck. He felt your rapid breaths cool slowly as he quickly fucked himself to his own release.

Letting out a grunted moan as his hot white load shoots into you. He pulls out of you and lets his body rest on top of yours. You left your head kissing his forehead.

He lifts his own head smiling up at you, “there is my pretty girl huh? Just needed the brat fucked out of you.” he taunted you. But just like you knew his eyes weren't dark with dominance anymore, just love filled them.

He stands up walks into the restroom grabs a towel, cleans himself up then gingerly cleans your exhausted sex.

He holds his hand out helping you walk to the restroom, where you clean yourself off completely and use the restroom. When you open the door you're greeted with a halfway-dressed Rick.

With a pair of comfy pants on but no shirt. He hands you an oversized tee shirt with a pair of comfy panties. You smiled pulling them on, resting in the comfortable silence with him. His hands wrap around your waist holding you close to him.

His mouth is attached to yours slowly letting his love for you spill out. Both of you collapse in the bed under the covers to cuddle, his warm rough hands rubbing your body as he encourages you to drink some water.

“Happy anniversary baby.”

#rick grimes x reader #rick grimes #the walking dead #the walking dead rick #rick grimes x you #rick grimes x y/n #rick grimes x original female character #rick grimes smut

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babyjakes · 5 months

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〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

event | kinkmas 2023

prompt | mutual masturbation

pairing | best friend!ransom drysdale x reader

warnings | very innocent!reader, bordering on little!reader. soft!ran <333 specifically soft for reader. ddlg undertones tbh (no use of the word daddy but ran is daddy af and also tells reader to "be a big girl" multiple times.) reader is having orgasm troubles/anxiety. mutual masturbation (clit rubbing, jerking off through pants.) subtle humiliation vibes (not verbalized.) praise and encouragement. delayed orgasm. he steps in and helps/finishes her off. he also comes in his pants lol. they come together! :D

word count | 886

it all starts when he overhears you on the phone with your friend, admitting you’ve never been able to make yourself come 😭

it somehow leads to him laying you out on your bed, tugging playfully at your jean shorts. “c’mon, baby. i promise, i wont make it weird. i just wanna help you”

and he’s your beeeest friend, your very best friend in the whole wide world, and you know he’s got plenty of experience and knowledge when it comes to this sort of thing, so you try to swallow down your humiliation and go along with it

he kneels attentively in front of you as you rest back against your pillows, shyly pulling off your bottoms. he chuckles sympathetically at your cute little pastel panties with your favorite cartoon characters on them. if it were any other girl, he'd probably make fun of them, but you've always been a sweet innocent baby in his eyes so he can't help but find it endearing 💕💕

"c'mon, cutie. don't be shy, it's just me" you try to remember that he's right; it's just your ran, your safe, wonderful ran, who you've known your whole life

you squeeze your knees together as you pull off your panties. ransom's surprisingly patient with you, "let me see, silly. can you show me how you've been doing it? i can't help unless i know what the problem is"

it takes a bit more coaxing before your knees finally fall to either side of you, revealing your perfect little petals which instantly have ran giving you the biggest heart eyes 🥺💖 "oh baby, you're so pretty down there. aww, are you a little wet, sweetheart? it's okay, don't be embarrassed" as you're squirming softly in front of him

your hands are so clumsy as you try to figure out where to even begin. he's right: you're wet (though you swear this isn't turning you on!!!) your fingers fumble around as you lamely begin poking and prodding at your leaky hole

ran raises an eyebrow at you, not sure whether or not you're playing dumb or just really this clueless. "that's it?" he asks in disbelief, clearly not impressed. you sigh, trying not to hide your face in your hands from embarrassment. "what about your clit?" noticing how you immediately grow more squirmy at his question, he calls your bluff- "come on, y/n. be a big girl and show me" 🥲🥲

you finally bring one hand up to begin rubbing carefully over your little button. you fail to hold in a soft gasp at the sudden rush of pleasure, earning a smile from the man sitting in front of you. "there you go. keep going, princess," he encourages you

as the warm, fuzzy feelings grow, you find the courage to spread yourself out a little with your other hand, giving you better access to your swelling bundle of nerves. ran's grin grows as he watches it growing and pulsating beneath your rubs

"shit, sweetheart. so fucking cute when you play with yourself like that," he curses softly, bringing one of his own hands down to begin palming himself through his pants. seeing him getting worked up by you only turns you on more. you don't even notice when your juices begin leaking down onto your bedsheets 🥲

you become more vocal, holding back fewer of your sweet little moans and whimpers. the noises you're making are clearly driving ran crazy, his pace over his impressive bulge quickening as his face flushes red. "fuck, just like that. keep rubbing that pretty little button for me, baby. look at you, you're fucking soaked"

your fingers grow faster over your throbbing clit, your breaths becoming more labored as you feel pressure beginning to build in your tummy. as soon as you recognize what's about to happen, a familiar sense of doubt hits you as your motions begin to falter. "r-ran," you choke out, big eyes looking up at him for help.

he's immediately leaning down with a worried look on his face, quickly recognizing the problem. "no, no baby, it's okay," he tries to cheer you on, "just keep going, you're almost there"

"can't do it," you frown as your poor clit twitches helplessly after being abandoned so abruptly

"yeah you can, come on. let me help," you can't even think to speak up or stop him before he's reaching down, using his own fingers to resume the stimulation. for whatever reason, you lay back and take it. "spread yourself open for me, sweetheart. just like you did before, there," he hums in approval as your hands fumble to do as he instructed. he keeps his pace steady over your hardened nub, watching as you quickly near the edge once more

"now come on, baby. be a big girl and come for me," with him towering over you, one hand gripping himself shamelessly through his pants while the other works your burning button just right, he's able to coax an orgasm out of you with just a simple command

"there it is, that's my girl," he's beaming proudly as you're finally given your release. the sight of you losing control under his simple touch and order is too much for him to handle; he comes right there in his jeans with a loud groan 😌

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cwunny · 19 days

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omg dating your brother's friends sounds so fun. Just slutting around with all his besties and being all distracting while your big bro's trying to hang out with them,,,

What a great way to flirt with your brother tbh lkasdfklsklaf - sincerely, another slutty little sister. (Oh shit what if we did it together then there'd be *two* of us to be all distracting)

chilling in ur brothers room bc his dorky friends invited u to watch them play smash. their controllers are quickly forgotten as they take much more interest in u <3

hushed giggles fill the room as you’re maneuvered into someone’s lap. “get off me,” you whine, but your protests are ignored by the group. your arms are pinned to your sides as your shirt gets pulled up over your tits. no use in trying to push away their hands when ur outnumbered :( your legs are spread apart by another boy as you’re bombarded with voices in your ear, “relax, stop squirming so much.”, “c’mon, we’re just playing around”, “seriously, don’t kill the vibe,”

your breath hitches as your panties are pulled to the side and cold air hits your cunt. sweet little cunny shown off for a group of virgins who have never been this close to a girl before <33

you whine and plead for your big brother to come help you, protect you, rescue you from his mean, awful friends who are taking things too far, but he furiously palms at his bulge in his gamer chair, fixated on your exposed, leaking cunt.

“spr.. spread her pussy open,” he chokes out, pulling down his shorts to tug at his hardening cock. you’re such a good girl, doing so good for your big brother’s friends, letting them play with your squishy tits and giving them full view of your little girl parts <3

even as you complain and tears well in your eyes, your cunny pulsates. despite your humiliation, you’re still eager to fit in with big bro and his friends. wanna be a good girl, wanna be one of the boys, so you let their fingers prod ur pussy even if ur scared :(( you’re praised for taking it so good, being such a good little sister, not even gonna think about telling mommy or daddy :(

getting passed around by ur big bro’s friends while he watches!! such a perfect slut, taking it all from big scary boys who only see you as a little cunny to finger <3

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junggunz · 3 days

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♡⸝⸝ nsfw alphabet: joker

cw: fembodied reader. typical thirsty rambles. an: thinking about his big ole dick got me giggling and kicking my feet fr.

joker's overall vibe while doing the deed: tap out by daniel di angelo // her way by partynextdoor.

A - Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

So cuddly and affectionate because unlike some people, he isn’t out there slanging dick around all willy nilly. Joker wants to take care of you after breaking your back so expect to be treated like royalty by him.

B - Body Part (their favorite body part on themselves and their favorite body part on their partner)

Joker is another one who gives me very humble energy. Overall, he’s satisfied with himself but he wouldn’t feel comfortable choosing a favorite body part on himself.

This isn’t a specific body part but Joker would really like it if his partner felt physically soft. Whether that be having soft skin or having some extra meat on your bones that make you squishy, I think it would tie into him really liking to cuddle with you. He just likes someone who feels good to hold in his arms.

C - Cum (anything related to 💦💦💦)

Joker is a healthy, fertile man. Bro is cumming buckets. I JUST FEEL IT IN MY BONES. I think he would be a little shy about making you swallow because he would worry about cumming too much or you not liking the taste. After you swallow, he’s definitely not afraid to kiss you.

D - Dirty Secret

Joker is the total opposite of Wooin in a lot of ways. One of them being how reserved he is. He definitely harbors a good amount of secrets regarding sex and he is not going to speak about them so easily. Even if the two of you get to a point in your relationship where trusting you comes as easily as breathing, I feel like he would still be hesitant about telling you his fantasies.

THAT BEING SAID, one of the dirty secrets that Joker is so tight lipped about is that he wants to roleplay with you. Specifically with you dressing up as a sexy nurse then tending to his injuries after a fight and of course, fucking after. He thinks about it every time you bandage him up.

E - Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Joker doesn’t strike me as the type to have a lot of hands-on experience. He might have some experience from a past relationship or two but even that might be a stretch.

Like most webtoon daddies, even if he doesn’t give off the impression he has a lot of experience, you can best believe that he’s gonna be naturally gifted in the bedroom.

F - Favorite Position

Any variant of missionary tbh. The eagle specifically might be his all time favorite.

G - Goofy (are they more serious or playful in the moment?)

Joker doesn’t try to be serious, it’s just…how he is. Even outside of the bedroom, you’re not gonna see him behaving in a super playful manner and even his jokes are more like deadpan humor. During sex, he gets super focused on making you feel good.

H - Hair (how well groomed they are)

Joker isn’t giving me the vibe that he has a jungle but I also can’t imagine him taking manscaping super seriously. It’s more like…he’ll trim it for the sake of being hygienic whenever it’s getting unruly.

I - Intimacy (how romantic are they in the moment?)

Wooin isn’t romantic because Joker has been secretly hogging all of the romance HAHAHA. But nah fr, this man is very romantic. For him, sex isn’t just about pleasure and getting each other off, it’s also a display of his affection toward you since he isn’t really the type to verbally express how he feels.

J - Jack Off (how frequently do they masturbate?)

This man is basically a single dad trying to take care of his younger brothers and puppy. There’s no time to masturbate. I feel like even when he does wake up with morning wood, he just waits for it to go away. The only instance I can imagine him masturbating is when you’re dating him and he can’t physically be with you in that moment so he’ll either jerk off thinking about you or call you to help.

K - Kink

Joker doesn’t strike me as the type to be super kinky but he’s not totally vanilla either. There are a few specific ‘types’ of sex I can imagine him liking a lot. For example, comfort sex. Morning sex. Needy, clingy sex.

As for his kinks…

Marking/biting: Whether it be you leaving marks on him or the other way around, he’ll proudly wear your love bites or scratches on his back.

Creampies/breeding: Joker is very aware of the responsibility that comes with raising children but like…he still wants to bust inside you and mark his territory. Sometimes just the idea of cumming inside you is enough to get him riled up.

Forced orgasms: idk I just feel like this man would thrive off of giving you back to back orgasms. Like…I think this kink would be the one of the few instances where you can get him to dirty talk to you and literally talk you through your orgasm.

Joker gives off so many daddy vibes but like whether or not he has a daddy kink is up in the air rn.

L - Location (favorite places to do the deed)

Anywhere where he can have complete privacy and the ability to focus solely on you. It’s more than likely that he lives with his younger brothers, right? Sooo the two of you probably aren’t gonna have any sexy time at his place. It’s either gonna be at your place or at one of those love hotels.

M - Motivation (what turns them on and gets them going)

Joker seems like the type to be ticklish or have a lot of sensitive spots that if you touch enough, he’ll end up getting turned on. Like most, knowing how much you want him is gonna make him excited as well. He’s definitely giving the vibe where cuddling together and you being extra handsy with him is going to be the most common scenario that leads to sex.

Also, you wearing his clothes really gets him going.

N - NO (what turns them off or something they’re strongly against)

Initially, if you have any sadomasochistic interests, he’s gonna be reluctant to act them out with you. With time, that’s something he can come around to. However, Joker is a firm no on anything too hardcore.

O - Oral (preference for giving or receiving, skill level)

When this man eats, HE EATS. type to suck the coochie right off the bone. Eat it til your legs are shaking and you’re trying to push him away from how sensitive you are. THERE WILL BE NO PUSSY TO SAVE FOR LATER BECAUSE HE DEVOURED IT ALL.

Anywho, Joker is a generous lover. Even if he wasn’t super skilled to start with, he would be a quick learner.

P - Pace

We love a man who can give us some variety. He wants to start off slow so he doesn’t break you with that big ole dick but the moment you start begging for more, you’re gonna wake up a beast.

Q - Quickie (opinions on them/how often)

Joker isn’t the biggest fan of quickies, but he’ll settle for them if that’s all he has time for with you.

R - Risk (do they like to experiment or take risks?)

Depending on what you’re into and wanna try, Joker is more than willing to follow along if it’ll make you happy. In general, he’s pretty satisfied with vanilla sex.

S - Stamina (how long do they last? How many rounds would they like to go for?)

JOKER ISN’T STOPPING UNTIL YOU TAP OUT. AND EVEN THEN, HE MIGHT NOT QUIT. but on some real shit, I don’t think Joker would feel like sex is finished until he’s sure you’re thoroughly satisfied. And after you’re pleased, he’s gonna keep going until he feels like he’s had enough.

T - Toy (how do they feel about using them?)

Joker is neutral toward toys. He probably gets a little confused by some and would want you to ‘demonstrate’ how to use them.

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Joker isn’t a total menace but he isn’t gonna tease super often. I think he would be pretty balanced.

V - Volume (how loud they are and what sounds do they make?)

Joker is another man who gives me ‘yall be afraid to moan? I be in my girl's ear like...’ Besides the pretty standard noises, every now and then when he’s stupid horny he would indulge in some dirty talk.

W - Wild Card

Lowkey…Joker would probably send you some top tier videos/pictures if you asked him. Like, he’s not gonna send you mediocre dick pics with his weiner just standing there like 🧍He sends really nice, erotic selfies. Then the videos…moaning with the sound on. Smacking the camera with the tip. He just knows exactly what to deliver.

X - X-Ray (what’s in those pants?)

Mans is like 201cm/6’6” tall. Joker got a whole ass tree trunk in his pants. If he slaps you with his dick you’re gonna get a concussion.

Y - Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Joker has a relatively low sex drive. While dating you, it might spike a little more but I think his mind is usually more focused toward his other priorities.

Z ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 - (how quickly they fall asleep after.)

Joker would probably only go to sleep if you did too. And when he does fall asleep after sex, he sleeps like a baby.

bonus!

Which feeling is a greater ache?

Craving Joker’s touch so immensely, it physically pains you on top of causing you mental and emotional distress? Or is it the throb of his cock stretching you beyond your limits when he finally slips inside you?

He’s so hot, hard and throbbing as he fills your little hole. His breath hitches as he watches his cock sink into your sopping pussy. The view is so good for both of you, amazing even, and it has you moaning in unison. It floods you with warmth and makes you giddy on the inside when he’s balls deep in you. Your thighs shake like leaves and your toes have already gone numb, but despite that, it’s safe to say that wanting him is more agonizing than this feeling. But god, does the feeling of his tip bumping against your cervix when he’s fully sheathed within your walls make you wanna cry out. It’s pain flavored pleasure that makes you want to both scream with elation and whimper from the intensity.

“Shh, shh…just relax.” Joker soothes you, his large hands gripping your hips and lifting them up before pulling your body closer to his.

Trying to calm you down while tethering on the brink of insanity was surely one of the most difficult things Joker has done. However, he really needed you to ease up on him. Gripping him tight like that had him feeling like he was going to burst.

Bodies perfectly slotted together, moving as one now that you had relaxed; the intoxicating feeling of Joker filling you finally getting to your head. Drunk off the ecstasy flowing between the both of you, Joker pulls his cock all the way out as a means of fighting off the overwhelming desire to brutally fuck your cervix. Eyes drifting down to the tip of his shaft pressing against your entrance before pushing back into you, you can’t ignore the thick, glossy shine of your arousal covering him. Slick with your juices, it’s easy for him to slip back inside then start off at a mild pace. Not too fast or too slow, but each thrust is deep and hard; the maddening sensation of his thick cock hitting all the right places getting you ridiculously close to your finish in such a short time.

“Feels so good in you, baby.” Joker grunts out between sharp snaps of his hips, a shaky groan falling past his lips when he feels you squeeze around him at the sound of his words.

Hands slipping from your hips and settling on your thighs, Joker pushes your legs back to venture further into the depths of your heat; your pleads for more fuelling him to give you everything he’s got.

“A-ah, it’s so fucking deep!” You whine out, but your hips are canting up towards him and your legs are spread apart; ankles resting on his shoulders.

“You can take it, you always do.” He murmurs in a gruff voice, movements unfaltering as he feels your walls sucking him in, somehow managing to get even wetter.

Splitting your pulsing heat open, Joker buries himself deep; bullying into your cervix until your eyes are rolling back. Where your bodies meet, it’s a nasty mess thanks to your pussy drooling all over him but the night was only beginning. Your first orgasm wasn’t enough to satiate Joker; he was ready to coax more from your soft and pliant body.

#windbreaker x reader #windbreaker smut #windbreaker headcanons #windbreaker scenarios #windbreaker joker #joker x reader #joker smut #joker scenarios

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spacequokka · 1 year

Text

BTS Kinks & Turn Ons

Right, so I lost a bet with @iibonniee and she got to choose the next thing I posted from my project list. It’s also Tipsy Drabble Friday so guess who’s vibing~ This is more drunk headcanon than my other birth chart interpretations so be prepared for some certyfied shitposting.

Seokjin || Venus: Capricorn, Mars: Cancer || Kink: Roleplay

The bedroom is his stage and best believe he’s ready to put on a show. Be willing to follow his head and take direction to have the night of your life. Specifically, says he likes big tits, so there’s that. Can be a nympho at times.

Yoongi || Venus: Aries, Mars: Cancer || Kink: Daddy Dom

Yeah, I said it. Likes being in control, caring for his partner as well as punishing them (sugar and ice). Loves giving gifts he can use or see in use. Honestly a softie under that grumpy cat look. Very good at after care and dealing with subspace without going overboard. 10/10 best daddy. Tends to fall in love, especially with people who consistently hype him up and support his ideas.

Hoseok || Venus: Pisces, Mars: Aquarius || Kink: Phone Sex

Lures you in with sweetness and fluffy playfulness. Sensitive and romantic. Loves to surprise you. But will also call you up and turn you on no matter where you are or what you’re doing. At work? Touch yourself under the desk. At the mall? Find a dressing room and let him see what you have on under that shirt. Needs to hear you get off. Wants to make sure he stays on your mind when he’s not next to you.

Namjoon || Venus: Scorpio, Mars: Cancer || Kink: Orgasm Control

Deeply devoted to pleasing you and is fucking amazing at it. Just imagine that beautiful mind focused on making you cum as many times as you can take it. Of course, this comes at a cost: you cum at his command, over and over, until you use your safeword. Don’t tap out, baby. Will thoroughly fuck your mind before he does your body. Prone to jealousy and will ensure you remember no one else will ever fuck you as well as he can. And I ain’t even mad, tbh.

Jimin || Venus: Scorpio, Mars: Scorpio || Kink: Praise with dom tendencies

Not Serendipity coming on when I get to him. Even if you don’t know shit about astrology, you know looking at double Scorpio, it just makes fucking sense, right? Like, of course, he is. Little menace to my bias list. Alrighty, so another pleasure giving king who loves your attention. (Charlie Puth didn’t lie.) Can’t stand your mind being anywhere but on him when he gets you alone. Will fuck you stupid until you fall apart so he can put you back together to his liking. Save yourself. Lives for training and breaking you in. Sounds possessive but really it’s you possessing him. He’s that devoted to you when you steal his heart. It’s only fair, no? Will gladly let you lead once you’re as drunk on him as he is for you. There’s little he won’t do for you after that.

Taehyung || Venus: Aquarius, Mars: Capricorn || Kink: Brat Taming

Thinking about that time I read @tatertotthethot‘s The Dom Next Door and Tae had a tat on his hand that said YOUR THROAT HERE like yes. He’d thoroughly enjoy the challenge of getting you to submit. He wouldn’t even have to do anything special to punish you. Just ignoring you when you’re acting out is enough because you know the pleasure you’re missing out on. Like why bother? When you get it together, he’ll toy with you until you’re crying and shaking then punish you with dick. We support Big Dick Tae in this house. Lowkey and determined with a slight temper and a need to stay in control.

Jungkook || Venus: Libra, Mars: Scorpio || Kink: Auralism

A gentle lover who wants to make your relationship work. Just wants to be treated fairly and share everything with you. 🥺 What gets him going is your voice, the little moans you make when you taste something delicious or when he hits that spot just right. It seems simple, but does so much for him. Especially when your mouth’s right by his ear. He’ll do everything he can to hear your voice. If you leave him a voicemail, you can bet he’ll save it just to listen to later when he can’t get his hands on you.

#bts headcanons #bts smut #seokjin smut #yoongi smut #hoseok smut #namjoon smut #jimin smut #taehyung smut #jungkook smut #bts x reader #seokjin x reader #yoongi x reader #hoseok x reader #namjoon x reader #jimin x reader #taehyung x reader #jungkook x reader

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dilucsfav · 11 months

Note

OH EM GEE HIIIIII !! FOR THE SUB THINGY COULD I REQUEST XIAO, SCARA, GOROU AND KAZUHA IF YOU CAN???? ABSOLUTELY NO RUSH AT ALL, TAKE YOUR TIME RAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH

omg HIIII!!!

HELL YES I WAS PRAYING SOMEBODY WOULD REQUEST THIS

this is gonna be so fun to write!! i had a lot of fun with dom genshin men acting like subs, it’s time to do sub men acting like doms😻TEHEHEHSHS THIS EXCITES ME

…. i have never written for some of these characters (gorou, scara, ALBEDO!!!, etc etc) but i’m so excited omg

i’m so sorry i’ve been so absent HELPPPP my energy has been so low and shit but i’m really trying to write more i promise I HAVE SO MANY FUN REQUESTS I WANNA WRITE AHHH

there were so many men i wanted to write for this so i’m sorry it took a while </3 but yes here you all go!!

Dom!genshin men x sub!reader (ft. scaramouche, xiao, kazuha, gorou, albedo, tighnari, childe)

warning(s): nsfw, slight? knife play, blood, marks and bruises, choking, spanking… yeah all the good shit, put ur big boy panties on😩

scaramouche

im sorry but he wouldn’t give a rat’s ass about your pleasure when he’s being dom-

would force you to choke on his dick with no mercy ong, just making you take it all deep and hard and mhmmm

IM SORRY LMAO IM JUST IMAGINING HIS SMALL ASS BEING DOM AND TRYING TO BOSS YOU AROUND AND ITS MAKING ME GIGGLE-

IMAGINE CALLING HIS FUCKING 4 FOOT 3 ASS “DADDY” OR “MASTER”- IM SORRY I 😭😭

sorry these are supposed to be good hcs mb

anywho he’d be a very mean & stubborn dom, and low key kinda abusive-

WOULD slap you if you’re a brat/didn’t do something right that he asked of you. like NOT SPANKING but like SLAPPING

would absolutely get off to seeing you bleed/using a knife on you💀

^^AND CRYING TOO??? yeah he’d probably hit you so hard or fuck you too much until you’re a crying mess cuz he’s into that and we all fuckin know it

“Say it again, (Y/N). You wanna be stuffed with cock so fucking bad, huh? Admit it.”

would call you dirty slut, whore, yada yada all that shit

IM SORRY YALL LMAO I DONT VIBE W SCARA IN THAT WAY BUT HOPEFULLY ITS SOMEWHAT ACCURATE 💔💔💔

Xiao

xiao please fuck me

anyways

so mean but such a soft dom at the same time, you get me?

when hes thrusting n shit, he’d totally go slower and harder rather than quicker and not-as-hard

…. cuz let’s be honest… if he went FAST… literally would be digging your fucking grave cuz his inner demons would definitely conquer the fuck out of your tushy

IM SORRY IMAGINE HIM GOING EXTREMELY FAST AND JUST GOING “EVIL CONQUERING” DURING IT-

i’m sorry please laugh at my jokes

honestly there isn’t really any kinks that i can think of that’d he’d be into?

in general, i think sex with him would be EXTREMELY intimate & sweet. like throughout it he’d pleasure you but he’d be so careful about it and so sweet💔💔 he’d have moments where he’d get carried away but it never goes too far

his teeth latching onto your neck while he’s fucking you HELLO!!!!!! CONQUER ME PLS

“You’ve been so, so good for me. Do you think you can take it all, (Y/N)?”

dude his dick would be to die for- cuz it’s not super big, in fact it’s pretty average size, BUT ITS SUCH GOOD DICK LIKE HE GIVES SUCH GOOD DICK AND WE ALL KNOW IT. LIKE HE KNOWS HOW TO MOVE IT IN ALL THE GOOFY FEEL GOOD AREAS N SWEET SPOTS N EVERYTHING

^^imagining his body all sweaty while he’s towering over you, fucking you, watching your expression and panting, brushing this thumb over your face and praising you but in a way that he’s asserting that he’s in control?

PLEASEEE

dude i’m sorry i’m sorry but i need to write just regular hcs & scenarios w xiao SO I CAN WRITE ABOUT RIDING HIS DICK CUZ GODDD

anyways i’m getting too carried away with xiao, next friend to write about-

Kazuha Kaedehara

soft dom. one hundred fucking percent. no way in HELL anybody can convince me he’d be a mean dom.

ngh ngh ngh THATS THE SOUNDS HE’D MAKE, THATS THE BEST WAY TO DESCRIBE HIS WHIMPER/MOAN WHEN HES GIVING DICK

tbh he’s just so gentle but so teasing to you too- he’d absolutely embarrass you and get you all flustered and have no regrets about it

“Mm… feels good here, (Y/N)? Look me on the eyes and tell me, my flower.”

would hit ALL the sweet spots and we all know it

pls pls he’d intertwine yours and his fingers and squeeze your hands super tight while he’s doing it with you, god god while also asking if you’re comfortable? omfgggg

…… do i think kazuha kaedehara likes seeing you tied up? ………. kinda

IDK CAN YALL SEE IT??? CUZ IDK I FEEL LIKE HE’D JUST ENJOY IT, OR AT LEAST HOLDING YOUR HANDS ABOVE UR HEAD?? PLS with that little innocent look of his /////////…

he’d do this awfully attractive chuckle during it I CAN JUST FUCKING PICTURE IT

oh holy shit he’d absolutely lift your legs onto his shoulders so he can kiss your thighs and just hold your legs cuz cuz coz UHHSHSHSHSH

legs legs what’s on the menu? legs legs what’s on the menu? legs legs what’s on the menu? *clap clap clap clap* LEGS!!!!

(please tell me i don’t sound like a dumbass and that somebody gets that song reference)

honestly kazu is totally a pro with his fingers… i don’t make the rules, i just write them

that made no fucking sense anyways

Gorou

IVE ACTUALKY NEVER WRITTEN FOR GOROU IVE BEEN WANTING TO FOR SO LONG HES SO MS HINA BBG

i’m sorry i’m cackling at the idea of gorou being dom but

ok but if he’s the dom one, it’s probably if he’s… in heat

^^YOU KNEW IT HAD TO BE SAID CMON CUS WHEN ELSE IS THIS MF PUPPY ENERGY MAN GONNA BE DOM? exactly.

so with that being said, we all know what “puppy energy” is like… puppies are very fast therefore Gorou go vroom vroom in that hole-

am i making too many dog jokes?? this is going to make me sound disgusting im going insane

so anyways … yeah so he’d go super fast and he wouldn’t really talk too much dirty he would just be VERYYY vocal and would pant and whine and grunt and all that shit

imagine him whispering “yes yes yes…” as he’s yknow GOD SAVE ME FROM MY HORRENDOUS SINS

he would hold your face as he’s going absolutely feral stop and then give you sloppy little kisses all around cuz he loves you 💔💔

i don’t think he’d bite & leave hickeys to “mark his territory” or whatever… that’d be a different character in heat 🌝 (that character comes later in these headcanons hehe get it because this text is green get it and anyways nvm)

so anywho he’d definitely leave smooches all over you and would just make you feel so loved and would give you ALLL the fucking attention

instead of being the type of dude to say that shit like “good girl/boy” “good job” “you’re doing well”… i can’t really see that idk maybe that’s just me??

^^ i think he’d probably say more things like “you’re so beautiful when you do that” “i’m so grateful to have somebody like you” yknow???

“(Y/N), don’t stop that, please… you should just look at how amazing you look right now.”

he’s so cute though definitely a soft dom that would make you feel all good n happy n loved and hhhhhhhhhhhh

Albedo

FINALLY I CAN WRITE FOR ALFREDO SAUCE HOLY FUCKING SHIT

please IVE WANTED TO WRITE FOR HIM SO LONG PLEASE YALL DONT EVEN KNOW HES LITERALLY MY FAV GENSHIN CHARACTER YALL PLS

anyways

jesus omfg he’s such a hot dom GUYS GUYS IVE BEEN WAITING TO RANT TO SOMEBODY (besides my magnificent partner they are so amazing for listening to my bullshit) ABOUT HOW DOM ALBEDO WOULD BE IN BED

for starters he’d tie you up. not just wrists but fucking ankles too

also while he’s fucking you he’d give you this look of like?? as if he’s studying you?? yk like examining you for a test or some shit yess me next master ngh🌝

would also have this look of just DISINTEREST while he’s going ham with you, like almost like he’s bored??😭😭 just so unphased

^^ just imagine him staring at you blankly PLEASE THAT IS SO INCREDIBLY FUNNY TO ME CUZ ITS SO TRUE IDK (and it’s hot)

absolutely he’d tame your attitude so fucking fast. such a big tease omg help

honestly he’s totally a giver- like he’s kinda not human so bro prolly dgaf about some of that shit anyways but imagining this scrumptious man slightly creasing his brows before releasing? eye and ear candy

(guys i promise i don’t just like him cuz of his massive fucking cock i actually just like him cuz his lore i swear-)

“Oh… did that feel nice, (Y/N), hm? Right there, was it?”

let me be your test subject pls

would rub your head?? afterwards?? THATS SO FUCKING RANDOM BUT IT WOULD BE SO AWKWARD TOO LIKE ITS HIS FORM OF PRAISE OR SOME SHIT

his aftercare is literally “ok put ur pants back on, let’s get back to work”

why am i attracted to emotionally dismissive gentlemen?

Tighnari

ah yes, i missed writing for tighnari

shit he’s so he’s so

unlike gorou (when he’s in heat), tighnari doesn’t necessarily have to be in heat to be dom…

god he’s such a fucking tease, he’d EMBARRASS THE FUCK out of you and would just laugh

another man that just takes it slow but OH HO HOOO IS HE FUCKING GOOD AT IT

teaser whilst also he’s twirling your hair with a finger, rubbing your lip with his thumb, smirking at you, voice low, hand rubbing sweet but suggestive circles all over you YESS PLS SIR

“Tsk… so needy, aren’t you, (Y/N)? You can’t wait very long at all for it, can you? Go ahead and ask me for it then, little slut.”

he has such attitude 💔💔💔

sex with him is the definition of “breeding you” cuz it’s just that… intense… just hot n sweaty and mhmm we all know fs

would bite your back, stomach, chest, legs… would leave bruises n hickeys ALL over you omfg with no shame at all

he wouldn’t give you anything unless you asked or begged for it NICELY ofc

^^would rub your head with a small “good girl/boy” praise too YUMMYYYY

even though he’s a big tease, he’d also make sure you’re okay with everywhere he’s touching you and would make sure to give you a nice lil aftercare session right after <333

Childe

jesus yall i had a childe phase-

i mean he’s cool n shit but like idk i don’t vibe with him much anymore🙁 HES SO FUCKING FUN TO WRITE FOR THOUGH!!!!

he’d spank you, tie you up, shove your face into the sheets and make you take it, would laugh at you if you cried… yeah he’s fucking mean in bed

^^ he’d know what’s too far n shit but yeah

^^^ ALSO IS IT JUST ME WHOS ALWAYS GOTTEN HUGE VIBES THAT CHILDE IS DEFINITELY INTO SPANKING YOU?? like there’s definitely other characters BUT ESPECIALLY HIM LIKE???!?!?!?!?

sex with him is so hot help, probably hurts so fucking bad because his dick is probably massive but it’d feel so good and would be so worth it

i’m going to rot in hell for being such a whore

this is so foul to say but he’d make you wear a skirt while he… yeahhh from the back 🤰

I MEAN AM I WRONG??

^^ mf probably wants to see you in a maid dress & cat ears n shit too he seems like he’d be so down fucking bad

he’d totally grab your face and make you look at him while he’s doing his shit

“Feels nice, yeah? You want me to keep going?”

no matter how dom he may act, he will never not whimper

^^^I CANT SEE HIM GROANING LMFAOSO HES TOTALLY A WHIMPERER

…. and he’d get off to seeing you cry. or rather wants to see you cry

^^ CUZ HE’D BE ALL “aww does it hurt that bad? I’m sorry…” AND ACT ALL CHILDISH

nasty man smh

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dangerouslyknown · 1 month

Note

Hi! Please do headcanons for gojo like you did Higuruma x

Satoru Gojo Headcanons 💎

A/N: Thanks for the request! My JJK obsession is hitting like a truck. I hope I delivered these Gojo headcanons well, mwah

Contents/Warnings: General headcanons, relationship headcanons both SFW & NSFW. Reader/partner is referred as "his S/O" or by they/them so gn!reader

General Headcanons

He used to play Moviestarplanet. He was sooo popular too. He had lots of friends and he made the silliest movies/artbooks which people loved

He likes to sing and usually he sings whatever is stuck in his head on random occasions, without really trying to sound good

...but oh boy if you ever get the chance to do actual karaoke with him... He sings beautifully when he puts the effort in. What a gorgeous voice, it almost surprises everyone

He goes crazy about Lady Gaga's songs and he loves to do silly little performances whenever he hears any of her songs

Gojo is also a Swiftie???

Somehow I feel like he is TERRIBLE when it comes to spending money. He hasn't had a day in his life where he had to worry about financial stuff, so...

He's the type of guy buy an expensive ice cream machine, then accidentally break it and buy a new one like it's nothing

He used to troll people online as a teen...

Actually, he probably still does it for the heck of it. He isn't one to do anything super offensive, but he enjoys messing with people

SFW Relationship headcanons

He hasn´t been in many relationships in his life, mostly because he rarely lets anyone close. Bro has trust issues :(

He dislikes being vulnerable in front of others, but his S/O is who he shows his true self. It is not something to take lightly

He KNOWS he is attractive and it flatters his ego when he is complimented on it, but if one wants to win his heart, you need to go deeper than that. He wants a person who truly appreciates him beyond looks

His love language is gift giving. He will gift his S/O anything they desire, and it´s his way of showing he cares. He gets excited like a kid in a candy store when he brings his S/O something and waits for them to open the gift

Most of the time it doesn't even have to be anything expensive. Of course he likes to spoil his S/O, but sometimes he just sees something small, which reminds him of them and he decides to buy it

Then, his unofficial love language is being annoying. He would ask "would you still love me if I was a worm" and whatnot

Related to that, he would act all smug and probably provoke arguments with his S/O just to entertain himself (but he's not malicious about it of course!)

When he sees something romantic, he would say "Ewww, sappy romance stuff" and then do exactly those things in private

He likes to show off with his relationship? Y'know, like posting about it in social media and PDA

This also ties to when he holds great pride in the thought that he's able to protect them no matter what. Maybe he's also a bit jealous and likes to show others that his S/O truly is his, and only his

Looooves to dress in matching clothing with his S/O!

Also, if he'd play online games with his S/O, he'd definitely want to do matching usernames (Sometimes it'd be cringe, but that's a part of why he loves doing it)

(NSFW under the cut)

NSFW Relationship headcanons

Leans towards being more kinky tbh

This man likes to have fun, okay? He is super adventurous in the bedroom. He's always coming up with new ideas for his S/O and him to try, and he usually is the one to initiate

He'd love to bring in ropes, blindfolds, toys of all kind and everything you could think of. He wants to use them on his S/O, but isn't against the idea being toys or ropes used on him either blindfolds wouldn't even work on him though

He´s a fan of playing with the dynamics. The vibes he gives is 50% pillow princess and 50% daddy, so there's never a dull moment when he switches up things with his S/O

He lives for teasing in the bedroom. You are not going to get anything easily from his arrogant ass: If he's a sub, he's going to be a brat. If he's a top, you need to beg him

He is capable of being serious during intimate time, but most of the time there's going to be funny and goofy moments

I could 100% see him doing something like slapping his dick against his S/O's face, then grin. At the same time it's hot but it's also hilarious (in his opinion)

Speaking of his cock, I think it's bigger than average. Length is impressive, then girth is more average-ish

Definitely very vocal during sex. He will not shut up whether it's whimpers or dirty talk

I think he loves to fuck his S/O from behind. He loves to kiss the back of their neck, their shoulders and all over their back while going at it

#jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #satoru gojo #gojo headcanons #gojo x reader #satoru gojo x reader #gojo imagine #jjk #dangerouslyknown #dangerouslyknownworks #dangerouslyknownrequest #gojo satoru #jjk x reader #jjk headcanons #jjk gojo #jujutsu gojo #Gojo relationship headcanons

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genz420 · 18 days

Text

Cabin 12 Headcannons 🍇 🎭

Masterlist | Rules

Content: Cabin 12 headcanons

Warning: Memiton of addiction, but Dionysus is the god of wine so..

The cabin with the closest siblings in my opinion

I feel like Mr. D would only have 2-4 demigods at a time

So that leads to them being super close

They all tend to have the same features of curly hair and purple eyes

A dead giveaway to who is their parent

They would all tend to be on the bigger side

Not that they are not strong, they are

But they would not have the typical Greek god look

Their beauty would be intoxicating though

Like the type of beauty where it’s obvious god is real because it’s not fair

Best hair in camp tbh

Also, Mr. D claiming them would be totally different from his usual trick with demigods and trying to get wine

Just straight up points at them and announces that they are his spawn

Some are the typical party-lover extroverts who can make friends with anyone and everyone

Then there are the theatre lovers introverts who have a close group of friends but when it comes time for the play of the summer they give the best performance that the camp would ever see

Mr. D def makes the camp do plays

He is the god of wine and theatre and can’t have wine

Would force the campers to do theatre to make them just as unhappy as he is

Big English teacher making students read Shakespeare vibes from him

Not Drama teacher vibes

But no matter what kind of kid they are, they would totally memorize Hamilton to spit the Hermes cabin

Because Hermes is Lin-Manuel Miranda

They are rolling with the LGBT+

Whether queer themselves or the biggest ally ever

They are also the campers who give the best advice and the type of friends who are always the go-to shoulder to cry on

They are the Camp therapists. Let's be real

I feel like they would get along best with the Demeter, Apollo, and Aphrodite cabins

They have the best relationship with their godly parent

Because no one can convince me that Dionysus doesn’t love his children

I feel like they would either have a horrible sense of direction or the best because of Ariadne

Addiction gene goes hard

Might not be to a substance, but they all definitely have that one thing they can’t live without

Especially have one drink that they love

I like to think that they all have a thirst that can’t be quenched unless it’s with that one drink

Also, they have the best or worst palates ever

Like that one person who only eats chicken nuggets and fries or the one who will eat everything and be a snob about it

They are cat people, not dog

Would definitely be responsible for the export of Strawberries

Bec even if the Demeter cabins help, when a Dionysus kid grows the strawberries it is hard to stop eating them

The most unserious counsellors in camp

Would definitely take a bribe not to report something

Because their dad ain't going to do shit in punishing them

Chiron might tho

Also, the worst people to play cards with

They def cheat and win

But if they are not winning they become the biggest sore losers

Uno is banned in the cabin for sure

Dionysus demigods are the best for the reason of not having daddy issues in a camp where everyone has daddy issues in some way

They can’t shit-talk their dad

He’s right there

I also think most of them get to camp at a young age and are probably not year around campers

But the ones who are year around make sure that camp, during the off-season, is hospitable

Would probably team up with the Hermes cabin to sneak in movies and mortal world media

They plan the best parties for the campers

They are the type to join a cult and end up becoming the leader

Dionysus campers are often overlooked but I just feel like they would be the backbone of camp

#dionysus #cabin 12 #children of dionysus #pjo series #pjo fandom #pjo tv show #greek gods #pjo x reader #percy jackson #demigod reader #demigod #percy jackson x reader

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nevernonline · 7 months

Note

Hello, I was wondering if I could make a request for Seventeen 🥺🥺, how would he react to seeing you breastfeed your baby in front of him?🫣

hiii nonnie!! of course <3 I'm sorry this took a second keke. I was nervous to make it feel right, thank you sm for the rec!!

I just did coups-hoshi for now so it's not too long if you want some more lmk <3

SVT's reactions to you seeing you breastfeeding and taking care of your child in front of them:

choi seungcheol:

he would melt immediately!! ik this man would be the biggest softie seeing his two loves enjoying themselves.

I can picture him catching his s/o off guard while they're casually resting as he comes home excited to see the two of them 😭

would come over to them without even saying hello verbally just giving a small kiss on each of their heads to join them sitting adjacent and watching with his little smile.

obvi the queen kkuma would come to enjoy being with her now larger family. (she is the light of MY life)

kkuma and baby cheol matching hair clips, when tbh?? (why can I write all day abt dad cheol idk??)

yoon jeonghan:

would be amazed he met someone who actually wanted to raise his child. not because he didn't think anyone would, just because he knows it has to be hard staying home while he works.

he would tend HAND AND FOOT while they take care of the baby, they worked hard so he would be working his ass off making them both so so happy.

constantly found giggling and buying the baby the cutest little gifts and playing with their sylvanian families families together.

seeing his s/o breastfeeding would def not be a surprise to him!! he'd be so happy that they just feel comfortable sharing the entire experience with him.

hong jisoo:

im so sorry shua as a dad would make me melt fr??

i can't even imagine the matching daddy x baby fits.

he'd sing softly to the baby while his s/o breastfeeds

Joshua def would make their s/o a killer ass playlist for while they feed just so the baby can have a chill time during feeding and so!! his s/o constantly thinks about them while they're doing so if he's not present.

hover dad <3 but in the best way!! knows he's busy so any little chance he can have to spend with his family he takes.

would be so excited about their child's first trip on a plane, probably to visit la and introduce them to the "LA Vibes"

100% best dad and husband a person could want.

wen junhui:

absolutely has read so many parenting books to understand how much goes into the process so he is always informed and not asking you too many questions if you're stressed.

when he saw you breastfeeding for the first time, he'd definitely be intrigued not in a seggsy way just in a genuine curiosity type of way.

he'd be really clingy asking you if you need his help for anything, pumping, diaper changing, etc.

above and beyond dad type like his s/o wouldn't even know what hit him.

him trying to teach your newborn his name >>>

playing you and your baby sweet piano medley's while plastering his cute smile all over the room.

def would enjoy sharing baby food

NEVER leaving your side, but in a helpful way, he'd def drop everything to be by your side like the best partner ever???

kwon soonyoung:

he's the mom 100%

I can picture him just literally going mush over the fact he has a child?? like??

would be tactile as hell to you while you breastfed, just crawling in the chair behind you to wrap his arms around you and his child, he has to be a part of it ALL.

showing everyone photos and videos 24/7 of the family he created. like he's so PROUD!!

compares his and his s/o's baby photos to see who their child looks like more and even if it isn't him, finds the smallest comparison to his features and gives them a nickname from birth based on that.

maybe a clumsy father at times but in the most endearing way.

makes choreography to cool baby songs and shows them off while his s/o feeds their baby for entertainment.

sings really soft and sweet love songs over a baby monitor.

286 notes · View notes

rinhaler · 1 month

Text

Get Your Passport, 'Cause We Runnin' Off

CHAPTER SUMMARY : the day of the big trip has arrived, and you're stuck with your bully for the whole ride there. maybe he'll be nice for a change...

boyfriend!yuuji itadori x f!reader x bully!megumi fushiguro

WARNINGS : 18+, PG chapter tbh, daddy kink mention??, attempted/thwarted bullying.

WORDS : 3.9k

notes : every friday was a funny joke right guys? right?

LAST CHAPTER ┊ MASTERLIST ┊ NEXT CHAPTER

“Are you sure you don’t need a ride tomorrow?” Gojo queries as he helps fill your fridge and cupboards with food he picked up for you. It's his way of an apology without actually saying the pivotal words. He told Yuuji he’d look out for you, and he will keep his promise. A few groceries are bound to make him look good in both your eyes and the eyes of your boyfriend.

“Yeah I’m sure. Toji is picking me up from here and then there’s a coach to take us out of town for our field trip.” you inform him.

He offers a smirk and silences himself as he continues to empty the bags. It's a devious look, and you know he has something to say. You aren't sure if you even want to know, but there's just something so irritating about Satoru Gojo that makes you think you'll die if you don’t pry whatever it is out of him.

“Could the reason that you’re declining my offer be that I don’t have what Toji has?” he wonders. You quirk your eyebrow in confusion; hoping it will prompt him to continue. “I mean, Toji has a perfect doppelgänger, right? A mini me, closer to your age.”

“What are you implying, Gojo?” you speak, an accusatory tone bleaching your words.

“Do you… like Megumi?” he inquires.

You wish you never asked.

You can’t help but scoff at that. He couldn’t have found a more inappropriate tree to bark up. Like Megumi? You can barely even stomach looking at him. He’s evil incarnate and, quite frankly, you hate him. You’ve tried being nice to him. You’ve tried being cordial. There isn’t much you haven’t tried to make your life easier when it comes to Megumi, nothing works. So liking him is completely out of the question.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” you laugh, helping him with the last of the shopping so that you can shoo him out quicker. He watches you frantically pick everything up and put it away, he can tell what you’re doing.

Did he touch a nerve?

“I’m with Yuuji,” you halt, a revolted look in your eye informing him of your now soured mood. “I mean, are you… stupid? Megumi has been bullying me since he moved into my art class, actually. So, maybe you should—”

“Alright, alright. No need to get defensive.” he snickers, pulling a lollipop out of his jacket pocket to suckle on as he heads towards the exit.

“I’m not being defensive. You’re being annoying.”

“Yeah? Well why is it that you’d rather take a ride with Papaguro over me. Is it him you like?” he pushes. It’s like he’s trying to make you snap.

“I. Have. A. Boyfriend!” you remind him, yet again, “Toji is hot, yes, in a friend’s dad calling you kiddo type of way. I guess. But he’s just that, a dad. He treats me like his own kid, and I have no interest in him passed being friends.” you explain, hoping to satiate Gojo’s curiosity enough to make him drop the subject.

“Do you call Yuuji daddy when you fuck? Giving off major kink vibes right now, sweetheart.”

“Get out.” you demand.

“Huh? Wait I was just—”

“Out! Gojo, out! You’re done. Get out of my house.” you tell him with a completely straight face. He holds his hands up in surrender as he makes his way towards your front door to leave. You’ve never met anyone as insufferable as Gojo in your life. Not even Megumi is as bad as him. You watch him from your door as you see him walk towards his car. When he opens the door, you decide to offer him some parting words. “Toji doesn’t like you very much, it’s like he doesn’t trust you. And I’m not sure if I do either.”

“Do you know what Toji did to his own kid? Abandoning him after his mother died?” he questions.

“Yeah. I do.”

“And you trust that guy and not me? Tch.” he sits behind the wheel and starts up his car. “Thought you were smarter than that, babe. I’ll see you around.”

The wait for Toji to pick you up is nauseating. It’s your first ride with both him and Megumi in the car. The younger Fushiguro had opted to catch a ride into school with his sister when he heard the news of Toji becoming your new chauffer. But with Tsumiki at work and zero desire to risk taking the bus and missing the coach, his dad became the safest option.

He sits in the back, much to your surprise, giving him the freedom to manspread across the backseat. Toji couldn’t coax many words out of you, your nerves were shot. Of course you said good morning and told him that you were doing okay, but that was as much as he could get.

“Be nice to her today, shit head.” Toji orders. He laughs when he feels Megumi kick the back of his seat in protest.

You shake it off. Everything. His voice, Megumi’s defiance. It all crumbles away as you look out of the window and pretend you’re a cloud.

“Looks like rain…” you sigh. They both hear you, but neither of them comments. The sky couldn’t be bluer and the sun is blaring down. Even the sidewalks are hot to the touch if you were to walk on them with bare feet.

“I’m serious Megumi. No funny shit today, best behaviour.”

“Tell him I’ve been nice to you so he shuts his fucking mouth. I’ve not been giving you any shit, have I?” Megumi speaks, kicking the back of your seat, eagerly awaiting a response. You sigh, and smile. But why should you keep covering for him? Today is going to be hellish whether he leaves you alone or not.

May as well get him in trouble with his darling dad.

“Are you counting when you locked us in the bathroom together? Or the other day when you when you called me an entitled bitch? Besides that, no. You’ve been so lovely to me ‘Gumi.” you hum, continuing to look out of the window.

The argument that breaks out between them goes completely over your head. The only thing on your mind is the sky. You wonder what colour the sky is where Yuuji is right now. Will he look at it and think of you, too? What is the sky like for him? Are you even on his mind? You wish he’d call, you long to hear his voice.

“Little bastard. I know you’re stupid, but I’m wonderin’ now if you’re fuckin’ deaf too. Because I’m sure I’ve told you to quit picking on her.” Toji scolds.

“I’ve done worse. Snitch.” he mutters under his breath.

“Listen to me, Megumi. Leave her the fuck alone. I won’t tell you again. She hasn’t done shit to you so stop making her life difficult for no God damn reason. Thought Yuuji was your friend, so what the fuck is all this for?” Toji continues as he keeps looking in the mirror so that he can stare at his son. It goes ignored as Megumi slumps back into himself and plays his music through his headphones loud enough to deafen the world around him. “Why didn’t you tell me about all that shit he did, princess?” he asks. You shrug your shoulders, ignoring him similarly to how Megumi was.

What a pair of brats.

He lets you both out of the car and stops you both from going anywhere before he says what he needs to say.

“You. Best fuckin’ behaviour or I’ll kick the shit out of you when you get home.” he warns his son as he ruffles his hair. He leaves right after that, heading in the direction of the coach eager to get a good seat. “And you, princess, call me if anything happens. I’ve got a meeting later but other than that I’m free. I’ll drive down to wherever the fuck you’re going and pick you up myself if he acts up.”

“I’ll be fine, Toji. Enjoy your day.”

“Yeah, you too.” he smiles, “Have a safe trip, kiddo.”

You feel yourself smiling and blood rushing to your face at the new nickname he’s bestowed upon you. It wouldn’t have made you as giddy if not for your meaningless conversation with Gojo.

Kiddo, huh? How embarrassing.

Maybe he was right about you having a daddy kink, after all.

You’ll have to let Yuuji know when you speak to him.

The coach is full of students and teachers, and most of the best seats are taken. Though, you do manage to find two unoccupied seats together, you manage to snag them before anyone else does.

Megumi is a few rows ahead of you on the opposite side of the bus; you catch him looking over his shoulders a few times at you. A furious deathly glare in his eyes, clearly still bitter over you ratting him out to Toji this morning.

He’s sitting alone, too, like he often does.

It surprises you that the mean girls of your class aren’t fawning over him.

And almost as if you summoned them, you feel a tug on your hair from behind. The redhead. The blonde traps you in by the window as she takes a seat beside you. Your heart is racing.

You’re sick of this.

Sick of them.

Sick of everything.

And having these two harass you the entire way is going to make this an even longer journey than it already is.

“Maybe we could ditch the group and have some cocktails.” the redhead jokes from behind you. “We had a great time last time we all got drunk together, right?” she snickers, earning a laugh from her friend in the process.

They become stiff and polite in an instant, and you don't even notice. You're too focused on using the window as your escape once more, imagining yourself as a drifting cloud with the hope it'll help you drown out their cruel words for the rest of the journey.

You gasp when you feel fingers digging into the fat of your underarm, gripping harshly enough to make you yelp.

“Get off me!” you shout.

You assume it's one of the girls trying to hurt you.

But you're wrong. Very wrong.

It's Megumi.

Is he trying to rescue you?

He tilts his head in the direction of the seats he's sitting in, telling you that he wants you to come with him. Noting that Megumi often chose words over actions, you decide he was the lesser of two evils and go with him. You pick up his backpack that he used to save your seat and get yourself comfortable beside the window.

“Is there a reason that you two keep bugging her? I asked you for one favour that you couldn’t even fucking follow. Are you trying to make up for it?” Megumi wonders. He speaks in hushed tones, but it’s still loud enough for you to hear.

“We’re doing it for you, babe! We know you hate her, and—”

“I’m not gonna fuck either of you, y’know? I was using you. And I didn’t fucking ask you to do anything for me after the club. Leave me and leave her alone.”

They both look at you with disdain. You can’t help but laugh, quickly covering your mouth and looking out of the window to disguise it. Their expressions are too funny not to laugh at.

They're acting as if you casted some witchcraft over Megumi to make him turn on them. If they had any common sense, they’d realise he is just an asshole who uses people to get what he wants. His thigh rests against yours when he sits back down. It’s nice, for some reason, feeling caged in by someone as threatening as Megumi.

He’s done this before in a way that sent fear directly to your heart. He did it to intimidate you.

But this… is different. It’s protective.

His head rests back against the tall back of the coach seats as he listens to his music. His head lolls to the side, and for whatever reason he decides to open his eyes.

And, of course, he’s greeted to the sight of the girls. His eyes roll and he proceeds to flip them off, clearly done with entertaining them for a second longer.

“Why did you do that, Megumi?” you ask, genuinely curious as to why he decided to save you from them.

“Shut up. Listenin’ to my music.” he hisses back.

You shrug your shoulders, knowing it’s best not to push him. You reach down to pick up your sturdy tote bag and pull out a colour by numbers book and a pack of felt tip pens.

You hear him scoff when you pull down the tray on the back of the seat in front of you so that you can start to colour in. It goes over your head, though, instead of making a biting remark you simply flip him off with a smile.

You hear him clear his throat and turn his body away from you. His eyes flutter closed, and you can only assume he’s trying to nap. It’s fair enough, you think, the coach trip is three hours long. Maybe he didn’t get much sleep last night.

He grunts as he turns back to face you. Though he seems a little disoriented. Does he realise he fell asleep? He’d been lightly snoring for ten minutes.

He looks down at your colouring book, grunting in disapproval as you continue doing your best to remain within the black lines.

“God I fucking hate you.” he mutters.

“Excuse me? You’re the one who dragged me over here!” you snap back.

“Yeah, that was before I knew you were the type of person to colour things in wrong. Why is the fucking dolphin purple?” he laughs a little as he speaks, clearly amused with himself as he berates your colouring skills.

“I like purple. It’s cute!”

“Give me a page, I’ll show you how it’s done.”

“Huh?”

“Give me a page.”

“You want me to rip out a page of my brand new—”

“I’m bored! Give me one to colour in properly.” he demands.

You flip through the pages heading towards the back. There are a few pages you want to do yourself, so you refrain from tearing them. He studies your face and the changes in expression as you see pages you like and want to keep for yourself. Until finally, you find a page with a lion in the wild. It’s so cute, you almost don’t want to give him it. But before you can change your mind, he snatches the book out of your hand and tears it out carefully himself.

“Hey!” you object, but it’s too late.

“Shut up. You’d only ruin it anyway. You know lions aren’t green, right?”

“You shut up.” you moan at him, returning to the page you’d been colouring and dipping your fingers into your pack of felt tips to get another pen. You barely blink before they’re missing from your hands and have been stolen by Megumi as he fishes around looking for a colour he needs. “Those are mine!”

“Heard of sharing?” he responds.

“You’re meant to ask if you can share.” you inform him. “You are the worst art student I’ve ever met. Don’t you have anything of your own?”

“Just shut up and colour your stupid purple dolphin, princess. Be a good girl and share your pens.” he teases as he begins to fill in the lions fur in a golden yellow.

You cannot stand how easily he can get into your head. Because now you are second guessing yourself and your decision. Maybe a purple dolphin wasn’t the brightest idea. But you do like purple! It takes more than a moment to calm the storm in your mind as you battle against his words and your feelings.

There are tons of artists who used colour ‘incorrectly’. Henri Matisse’s Femme au Chapeau springs to mind in a vividly clear image. You decide that you won’t stop there. Every single colour you are about to choose will be ‘wrong’. Why not make the sea pink and the trees blue? Maybe the sand will be red and the sky yellow? It’s your God damn colouring book that you paid for with your own money.

Colouring alone passes an entire hour. Megumi can’t believe his eyes when you show him your finished page. You have a prideful look on your face. And he nods. Is that… approval?

“I actually don’t hate it.” he tells you.

“Thanks. I think?”

He presents his own, looking slightly disappointed in comparison to yours. It’s wrong, but so very right. It’s fun and exciting to look at. His, on the other hand, is boring. It’s how it should be, but it isn’t as entertaining as yours.

“Give me another one, I wanna make it like yours.” he demands.

“A please wouldn’t hurt once in a while.”

He takes your book from you, looking for a page he’d like to colour in. His fingers hover over an elephant you had your eye on. You’re begging that he doesn’t tear it to colour in himself. You scrunch your eyes as you prepare to hear the all too recognisable sound of paper ripping. But instead, a simple ‘tch’ leaves his lips as he flips the page.

“Please may I take this page?” he asks, pointing at a bear in the woods. You nod, grateful that you have the elephant all to yourself. You both get to work, and you are both filled with glee as he begins to colour the friendly brown bear in a sky blue colour. You decide to colour your elephant red, although you regret it almost instantly. You hope you’ll be able to fix it.

“So, you still haven’t told me why you saved me from those girls.” you remind him, prodding for information as to why he decided to be your knight in shining armour.

“So?”

“Why did you rescue me?” you bluntly ask.

“Why did you rat me out to my dad this morning?” he questions back. It steals your breath for a moment, you have no idea what to say.

Why did you do it? You’re just mad at the world, you suppose. He hadn’t actually done anything particularly awful. Nothing to scare you or force a lump in your throat, so you had no reason to tell Toji. But you did. You’re suffering without Yuuji. Why should you be the only miserable one?

“Why did you call me ‘Gumi?” he torments with a sinister smirk on his face.

“I’m sorry about this morning. And, thank you for saving me. It’s been tough since Yuuji left, and—”

“I don’t care.” he tells you, pulling his headphones back over his ears as he starts to colour again. You shrug, assuming you won’t hear from him again until he finishes his up-and-coming masterpiece. “You piss me off, y’know?”

“Feelings mutual, trust me.”

“Listen. I’ve never had a friendship with a girl before. I just sleep with ‘em, normally. But you’re not a dumb cunt on legs like the rest. I wanted to try with you, for Yuuji, but you’re so fucking nosy.” he informs you.

“You’re disgusting. You’d known me all of two minutes and decided I was a good for nothing whore. I didn’t do anything to deserve any of the things you did to me.” you tell him, doing your best to keep your volume lowered so nobody around would be able to hear you.

“Maybe, maybe not. I don’t like talking about my personal life with anyone and you just… you know. Anyway. My dad’s a selfish asshole but he’s trying, and that’s because of you. So I suppose I should be thanking you for that, at least. And he wants me to be nice to you, so that’s why I saved you. I’m sure if you grew a fucking backbone you’d be able to handle them yourself.”

“I used to have a backbone until you started bullying me and destroyed my confidence.” you whined at him, earning a chuckle.

“I said I’m done with you, with that. I don’t know why I’m so desperately craving Toji’s approval but here we are. I can’t help but hate you, but I’ll have your back when it comes to those two. And… if I’m mean, I’m just fucking with you.”

“Shut up.”

“If my dad likes you there must be something off about you. He’s shady. Dangerous.” Megumi tells you. You shake your head, dismissing him.

“Toji is a big teddy bear. He doesn’t scare me, but you do.” you hum. “You’re fucked up and you know it. I don’t trust you as far as I can throw you and I’m sure it won’t be long before you’re making my life hell again.”

“Teddy bear? Ugh. You’re not fucking him, are you? My dad?” he fake gags as he thinks about it a little longer than he intended.

“Why do people keep asking if I have a crush on your dad?” you whisper to yourself. But, you’re a fool, because of course Megumi heard you. He raises an eyebrow, clearly intrigued by your accidental statement. “Gojo.”

“Fuck sake, those two. Ignore him, they’ll both do anything to one up each other.” Megumi huffs, a disapproving shake of his head punctuating his statement.

“So you go way back with Gojo too, like Yuuji? How do you know him?”

“See, nosy.” he scoffs. “A story for another day, maybe. Or just ask your new best friend Toji when we next carpool.” he mocks you, finally blocking you out with his headphones again as he pours all of his focus into his bear colouring.

It’s such a small world.

How have you found yourself falling into this tight knit circle of family and friends who all seem to know each other? It’s crazy that they are all so close and yet so far.

Megumi and Toji are father and son but they are practically worlds apart in terms of closeness. Yuuji hates Megumi like he thought he never could. The Fushiguro’s are both related to your ex Naoya. And Toji, Yuuji and Megumi all have a connection to Gojo.

Megumi mentioned that Toji is shady and dangerous, but you don’t get that vibe from him at all.

Gojo on the other hand has an incredibly seedy aura about him. He’s sweet to you, sure, but why? Just because Yuuji told him to be? Is anyone really that nice? It’s like he’s going above and beyond to make both you and Yuuji happy. You can’t tell how Megumi feels about the white haired menace, but you know that Toji loathes him.

Why?

What the fuck is going on with the men in your life?

84 notes · View notes

honoviadakai · 3 months

Text

Rating the Hazbin crew based on how much I trust them to drive me places 🚗 😈

(This idea comes from @not-just-another-hazbin don’t think I didn’t see your reblog my friend, it’s been making me cackle for a week now 🤣)

Charlie 🏨🎶:

8/10

Oh this is the SAFEST person you could get in a car with

Although

9 times out of 10, she’s probably not the one driving

It would be Razzle and Dazzle

That being said

When she DOES drive, you’re guaranteed to get from point A to point B in one piece

She’s a little too safe though….

She follows all traffic laws to the letter

And that wouldn’t borne a problem…if you guys weren’t in hell

Traffic laws in hell are a suggestion more than anything else

So more often then not, people are yelling slurs and insults at you two

Also, she’s lowkey a s low driver

She refuses to go above 30mph unless absolutely necessary

And that’s usually never with her

So if you have an appointment at 4pm and she’s the one driving you

No you don’t

It’s at 2pm

3pm at latest

She honestly gives off massive “trying to be the cool mom” vibes when driving

But her some slack, it’s the daddy issues that make her give that vibe

Vaggie 🦋🗡️:

8/10

She’s pretty ok at driving tbh

She’s gonna keep you safe and she’s more than capable of navigating you through the hellscape of hell’s roads

But her road rage is insane

Like you’d think someone like Husk has horrible road rage right?

Nah

It’s Vaggie

She genuinely might actually start ramming into people if they’re being truly unreasonably unhinged and threaten your safety

She truly just wants to keep you safe so that’s exactly what she’s gonna do

Just keep your seatbelt on…please

She’s also just not gonna let anyone eat in her car

No exceptions

Alastor🦌📻:

-100/10

Why…oh why in the ever loving FUCK would you get in a car where the RADIO DEMON was behind the wheel!?!

Get out of the car!

NOW!

He’s gonna cause an accident on the freeway on purpose!

And god help you if you say you’re in a hurry!

He’s gonna grove even slower than Charlie!

Like 5MPH kind of slow!

DO. NOT. LET. ALASTOR. DRIVE!

Angel Dust🕷️💕:

6/10

He’s an average driver tbh

Well…

When he’s being chill/sober

He’s pretty good at staying out of trouble and getting you from point A to B in the time you need

Now if he’s having a manic episode or had too much coke….

Please for the love of god buckle up

He’s speeding so fast it makes Sonic the Hedgehog look like a tortoise

He’s there for a good time, not a long time and he wants to see some shit get wrecked

But tbh he might not let you in the car if he’s doing this

He doesn’t care what happens to him

But you?

Your safety matters so much to him…

Thankfully he hasn’t done stuff like that in a long time so for the most part, he’s a good person to go to if you need a ride

Husk🐈‍⬛🥃:

9/10

He’s got the soul of a grumpy old man and he drives like one too

First of all

He’s gonna complain when you ask him to take you anywhere

He’s gonna drive you ofc

But he’s gonna act like you took him away from something important

It was booze

You took him away from his quiet drinking time

How dare you

He’s gonna get you from point A to B as quickly and as safely as he can

Nothing crazy, he just wants to hurry back home with as little chaos happening as possible

Low key I feel like he plays country, blues and/or rock music from around the time he was alive

It’s mostly sad music if you really listen to the lyrics

He honestly doesn’t care if you eat in the car but if you make a mess, he’s making you clean it

It’s honestly like getting a ride from you’re very tired and jaded uncle

Niffty🐞🪡:

-90/19

Absolutely not

First of all

Look at her

She’s like 3 ft tall

How is she supposed to reach the pedals or look over the steering wheel????

Second

Even if she was tall enough to drive properly….would you honestly get in the car with her???

The best way I can explain her driving….

And even then…I think she’s 1000 times worse than this guy

She’d tumble it hard enough to make it explode while you’re both still inside

And she’s laugh gleefully….

Just get a cab…it’s much safer

Sir Pentious🐍🥚:

-60/10

I know he’s capable of piloting his war machine

But piloting a ship and driving a car and very different for him

Ships are easy for him

But cars????

It’s like reading a foreign language to him

You’ll eventually reach your destination sure

But the town you just passed through is somehow on fire

And so is the car

And it’s only being held together by duct tape and prayers…

Just walk

Your chances of coming home in once piece is much higher that way

#Hazbin Hotel #charlie morningstar #Vaggie #hazbin hotel vaggie #Alastor #alastor the radio demon #hazbin hotel alastor #Angel Dust #hazbin hotel angel dust #Husk #Husker #hazbin hotel husk #Niffty #hazbin hotel niffty #sir pentious #hazbin hotel sir pentious

119 notes · View notes

choke-me-joey · 1 year

Note

Can I get #27 JQ?

Yes yes yesssssss thank you for this dom Joe is my faaaave 😫😫😫

27. I'm going to fucking ruin you.

Joseph Quinn x reader

Content warning: 18+ content minors DNI, rpf (don't like don't read), I have no idea how fashion shows work, unprotected rough piv sex, Joe has slight dom vibes in this???, daddy kink, squirting, creampie, the usual tbh

Hoe-vember masterlist

Amongst the crowds at the Dior show of Paris fashion week was not the place you'd ever have expected to have your fiancé lean in, seemingly with just a sweet, innocent kiss to your cheek, and growl into your ear "Just you wait until we're alone, I'm going to fucking ruin you."

Your cheeks immediately flush and you pray that nobody notices. You keep up your smile for the cameras. This was your first public appearance as a couple, ever, despite having been together for just over a year now, and he decides to do that?!

Fucker.

You squeeze his hand to let him know you heard him, and shoot him a small smirk. His manager directs you through the insane crowds, your heart fluttering as Joe was trying to help her get safely though the crowd as she was pregnant. God he was such a fucking sweetheart. How can someone be so sweet and so utterly filthy at the same time?! It just wasn't fair.

Once you were safely inside, Joe had a couple of interviews so you just kind of floated around awkwardly until they were over. Then there were countless press photographs, and to your suprise Joe was keen to have you by his side in every single one.

"Mr Quinn, over here! Mr Quinn, who is your lovely lady friend?" The reporters were shouting, and the flashes firing off repeatedly were starting to give you a little headache.

"This is my girlfriend, Y/N," Joe shot a grin at the cameras and immediately the shouting grew louder, the reporters yelling left, right and centre.

"Y/N! Y/N! Over here!"

"Who are you wearing, Y/N?"

"Congratulations on your relationship, Y/N!"

You stuttered over your replies, not used to being in the spotlight like this. Joe stepped aside, grinning, letting the photographers snap away at you.

"Miss Y/N, look here please, that's it!"

"Beautiful!"

"Y/N, you look stunning!"

"Isn't she breathtaking?" Joe grins as he joins you again for some more couples photos, sliding an arm around your waist and squeezing your side. You turn your head and kiss him, and the place practically explodes.

After a whirlwind of a day, you let out a sigh of relief when you and Joe are back in your peaceful, albeit ridiculously fancy, hotel room. You sit on the chaise lounge and reach down to undo your heels, which have pretty much made your feet go numb now.

"Don't you dare." Joe growls from across the room. "Leave the heels on."

"Joe, babe, my feet are killing me-"

"Leave. The. Shoes. On." He moves towards you, jacket, shoes and shirt abandoned leaving him in just the crisp black trousers and black socks. The dominance in his voice causes you to shiver and clench. "Come here." You do as you're told, standing up and walking over to him. He pulls you into a kiss, a real kiss this time not the sweet pecks you'd been exchanging all day. A kiss that lets you taste him, all mint and smoke. You can't help the groan that escapes you as you feel his cock already tenting, and you reach between you to squeeze, making him hiss. "Fuck, do you know how much I wanted to sack this whole thing off today and just come back here and do nothing but fuck you?"

"I gathered from your little comment earlier that you were a bit horny," you giggled, continuing to slowly palm him through his pants as he trailed kisses down your neck.

"A bit? Babe, you have me permanently horny but this dress..." He holds you at arms length to look over you. "Shit, I've wanted to be balls deep in you since you put it on this morning. You look fucking insane."

"You have such a way with words, Joseph." You shoot him a coy smile. He smirks back at you.

"Dunno about words, but can I have my way with you? I meant what I said earlier, I'm not gonna be nice, love. Wanna have you screaming."

"Please" you whimper, squeaking in surprise as he whips you around, practically whipping the zip of your dress down and pushing it off you. He curses at the sight of you in your heels and underwear. Once your dress is out of the way, he leads you over to the massive table in the middle of the lounge area, pecking a soft kiss to your shoulder blade before roughly pushing you down chest first onto the table. You hiss at the cold wood against your skin but stay there, your ass in the air and surely a damp spot on your panties.

"Fuck, look at you." Joe sighs from behind you, and you hear his belt undo and the trousers fall to the floor. He shoves his boxers down just below his bum and comes closer behind you. You feel him peel off your underwear and he chuckles at the string of slick that clings on to the delicate lace. He rids you of those, flinging them somewhere in the room. He brings his hand to your face. "Spit."

You do so, and you feel another wave of arousal flood through you as you look over your shoulder to witness Joe lubing up his cock with your spit. It was so dirty and you loved it.

Joe makes eye contact with you, raising an eyebrow in silent communication to you. You nod, and he grabs your head and pushes your face down into the table at the same time as he pushes his cock into you. You scream into the table, the stretch and fullness of him almost too much.

"Fuck, Joe!"

"That's not what you call me when my cock's in you, is it baby?" He grunts, pulling all the way out and slamming back into you again, the rough drag of his perfect cock through your walls and over your gspot had your eyes filling with tears, it was so good.

"Daddy." You gasp, clutching the table as Joe starts a rough and beautiful pace, satisfied with your answer. "Fuck, daddy, s'fucking good."

"Yeah, babe? Shit, you feel so fucking good, so tight and wet for me, been thinking about this all fucking day, the way you looked in that dress was driving me mental." Joe grunts, his thighs slapping against the backs of yours. He sneaks a hand down to circle your clit, making your pussy involuntarily clench around him. "Oh fuck, babe-" he groans, a warning tone to his voice. "-gonna make me cum if you do that."

"Fuck, Daddy, please!" You sob, the coil within you winding tighter and tighter the harder Joe fucked you. "Harder, wanna cum, wanna cum so bad, please, please, please-"

Joe smirked as you babbled underneath him, revelling in the feel of your pussy sucking him in and clamping around him. He lightly slaps your clit, knocking the wind out of you as you cum, suddenly and violently with your legs almost giving way beneath you. The sound that leaves your mouth is heavenly, Joe commits it to his brain forever, before flipping you over, placing your back on the table and your legs over his shoulders as he continues to fuck you, chasing his own release.

Your eyes roll back; the feeling of him so deep and so deliciously rough paired with his fingers rubbing over your clit quickly was enough to send you over the edge once more, a small stream of liquid gushing from you, coating his lower stomach and pelvis. Joe swears loudly, cumming on the spot, his own orgasm taking him by surprise. You whimper at the feeling of him releasing spurts of cum into you; it was your favourite feeling in the entire world.

"Shit...shit...fuck, you-" Joe struggles to catch his breath and form a sentence. "You squirted. You fucking squirted."

"I'm sorry," you groan, cheeks flushing as you bury your face in your hands. "I didn't think I could, I've never done it before-"

"Really?!" Joe grins down at you, unable to hide how proud he was of himself for making you do it for the first time. "Oh, baby, we're going to have so much fun..."

#joseph quinn x you #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn smut #kats hoevember event #joseph quinn x y/n

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jjwho · 10 months

Text

Who is your Next Lover

Pile 1. Pile 2

Pile 3. Pile 4

Pile1

Cards pulled out: Five of pentacles, ten of pentacles reversed, seven of wands reversed, three of swords reversed.

Okay pile oneee

Oof so what im getting is that your person might feel left out in the cold, having it ruff especially if its financially, maybe their parents are divorced because of financial issues.

This person really genuinely has it ruff, like they mightve unexpectedly lost a lot of things, like family and espically money, I'm seeing a scene of being in their parents debt and repaying their debt.

Shame man and I see them always surrender so easily and just saying yk fine I'll pay for their debts even though they should. I feel like this person is trying to stay optimistic

This person is someone who has it really ruff but still smiles yk. Hides the pain through a smile and just tries their best and stays optimistic even though the circumstances are bad. I do feel they are trying to ket go of pain and grief but shame man you should take care of them😭🥲

Physical traits:

-Might look German, Dutch or Afrikaans or raised there

-Dark skinned

-Youthful appearance

-Doe eyes

Awww so innocent. I hope that helps you pile one. Just know this is a general reading si nit everything is gonna resonate

Pile 2

Cards pulled out: Revered- King of pentacles, death, ten of swords

Upright- The High Priestess

Okay pile 2 so uh

This person might not have the best background or past, cause this person might of been very unstable with money and just an unstable person. May come off as cold and rude and greedy. Now they also have a fear of change, they don't want ti change their old habits for some reason. Or didn't want to.

Now maybe they are trying ti change that now, but it takes a really long time for a man or woman like that to change so yeah. Just live your life and don't stay with this person if they aren't gonna treat you well.

They also might come off as mysterious at first or they have a thing for mysterious people and this person really has a thing for desire like he can't control himself and just takes and tales that's what im getting.

(Sorry very toxic masculine energy that's why I called it a him.)

Physical traits:

-oop they may appear to be more feminine, but personality might be masculine

-They have nice nails

-Curvy

-Asian(Asian also means Indian people)

Okay hope that helps pile 2222

Byeee

Pile 3

Cards pulled out: five of cups,ace of pentacles,seven of cups, seven of pentacles revered

Okay pile 3 sooo

Your next lover is giving me daddy boss vibes

Like this person gots lots of money and opportunities and shit, but idk this person is always focused on the negative, this person is a workaholic doe

This person just needs to set their mind straight, like this person might have a kit of set backs or procrastinate or put their decisions on hold which they shouldnt cause.

Money.

If yk what I mean.

But that's really all that I'm getting tbh, they might a little lazy too when it comes to live, not too experienced in it and enter really been in love. To focused on work yk.

Physical Traits

-They got abs-

-Freckles

-Strong arms

-summer aesthetic

Damn they work out. Hot for uuu

Okay byeee hope that helps pile 3333

Pile 4

Cards pulled out: eight of pentacles, the devil, judgement, ten of swords reversed

Okay pile 4 so uhm damn

So you might know this person from work, might be a new worker, they work really hard and might attract a lot of the higher ups. They're confident in there work too, now they might be a bit of a sexual person who's a bit obsessive and yk very sexual and naughty ooop. Yeah yeah. Like a dark but attractive aura. Pure and cool at work but sexy and whatever around outside yk yk.

Some who likes fairness though. Very strong taste in justice. And someone who stands up for themselves and other yk yk.

Sexy, hardworking, good morals, sexy again.

That's all that I'm getting tbh

Physical Traits:

-Doe eyes

-Light skinned

-Brown eyes

-they might not smell the best tho-

Hope that helps byeee

#free tarot #tarot community #pick a pile #astrology #intuitive readings #pick a pile reading #pick an image #psychic readings #tarot deck #free readings

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vendetta-if · 1 year

Note

LMAO IMAGINE IF THE CHARACTERS SEE THEIR RESPECTIVE POLLS 🤣

MY MC WOULD BE CHEERING FOR HIS DADDY AND ASH WHILE SECONDARY CHEERING FOR LUKA AND RIN 😉😁

also on a much more normal / thirstier ide note, can i get a scenario where the RO has been having a rough and stressful week 😖 and MC is worried about them, so when it's the weekend and the RO just returned from work, they enter their room to see a VERY EXTRAVAGANTLY decorated room with scented candles everywhere, the room itself is dimly lit by the candles giving off a very romantic vibes 😎 and lo and behold on a king sized bed covered in rose petals is th culript, i.e. MC dressed in (whatever you want them to be wearing, could be a maid dress, a qipao, maybe a lingere or nothing at all, depends on you or the RO 😏) with a rose clutched in their mouth. "wanna have some dinner?" MC winks.

SORRY I'M JUST HORNY ALRIGHT TOO MUCH ANGST IN THIS BLOG AYO WHERE MY HORNY BROS AT

😂 Viktor would smile awkwardly—maybe if he were younger, he would be more proud about winning the poll by quite a significant margin over his brother 😎

Luka would be so embarrassed while Jackal is on fight mode, standing in front of him protectively and possessively. Luka is already taken! Get away from him! 😠😤

Grandpa is just standing there stoically and menacingly 😐 Not a lot of stuff amuse him a lot; he suppose he’s still pretty attractive for his age, then 😆

Takashi is laughing awkwardly while Rin is sulking. He’s a bit flattered inside to be able to almost beat the big ol’ man Morozov himself 😂

Newton has never been in a poll where he got such a low number of votes. If he were younger and still single and unmarried, he would be quite insulted 🤣 Well, it still stings even now, but he already has his wife and kid; he doesn’t really care about the poll 😕

😆 If you’re looking for fellow horny enthusiasts, you can join my Discord Server if you want to. I have special horny channels and you can start a discussion there or join in any discussion. As for the steamy scenario 😳

Ash

MC could be wearing anything and Ash would find it hot, tbh 😆 But let’s imagine it’s the classic lingerie. Ash would be blushing and smoking. “D—Dinner? Do you want me to order some takeaway?” They try asking. After MC makes it clear what they mean by “dinner”, Ash would almost faint in place 🤣

Rin

MC would be wearing a collar and some ropes tied around their body as the only articles of clothing 😏 As soon as Rin sees you, they would smirk. “Dinner, you say? Oh, sure, let’s go to one of the fancy restaurants downtown now, no need to change outfits,” they would tease MC.

After MC makes it clear to them what they meant by dinner, they would hum, “Oh… Why don’t you just say so clearly from the beginning?” Their smirk widens. “Well, I’m starving and you better be too.”

Santana

MC would be in a state of half-dressed, bonus points if it’s some kind of formal or business formal clothings; shirt, dress, skirt, garters, gloves 🤭

Santana would smile as they see MC on the bed, the stresses and weariness of the day are evaporating away. “Dinner, huh? Are you sure you don’t want to have some real dinner first before we do this?” they ask playfully.

Skylar

For Skylar, I would imagine MC wearing some kind of sexy superhero/villain costume 🤣 They don’t mind whipping out their own for the roleplay (just don’t tell the Agency about it 😂).

A wide grin breaks on their face immediately as soon as they lay their eyes on you. “Oh, what a delicious dinner! Don’t mind if I do!” Dive onto the bed 🤭

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winters-hysteria · 2 years

Text

nsfw aged up f. hargreeves nsfw alphabet

you've been warned, minors din

A= Aftercare (what they're like after the act)

i feel like five would seem like he's trying not to care but seeing you laying there all pretty after he's ruined you turns on his absolute *need* to make sure you're okay

B= Body part (favorite body part their own or their lovers)

his favorite part of himself is his hands. they're strong and really nice looking, and he can use them to grab you/push you around roughly and/or gently pin your wrists down

fav part of you is your ass. there was this one scene (can't remember the episode) but he stared at somebody walking out the door with a really weird smile and his eyes popping out and idk i feel like he'd do the same thing to you walking out a door, just stare and then klaus walks over like "eheheheh whatcha lookin' at buddy buddy boy bro brother homie" and he's just like "oh nothing nothing that interests ur gay ass anyways"

C= Cum (anything that has to do with it)

he'd love to finish inside you, but even if you don't let/want him to (which he will totally respect) he likes to cum in your mouth or your breasts, even if you are a part of the itty bitty titty community

tbh i think he'd like that even more bc (he has a size kink i'll get into that next )

D= Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory)

he has a SIZE KINK. a really really nearly insatiable size kink.

i believe he'd like it if his S/O was really small / petite cause it makes him look SO MUCH BIGGER than you and goddammit if he doesn't get even hornier when you're on your knees for him and he looks down to see ur pretty lil hand wrapped around his cock

E= Experience (do they know what they're doing)

seeing as i write for five in his 20s, i think he might know sort of what he's doing but he's gonna need a lot of guidance. he also likes to play dumb when it comes to touching you cause he likes seeing you touch yourself and also it helps a lot with him learning what and where to touch

F= Favorite position

uhhhh this mfer's favorite position is 100% cowgirrrrrl

he loves seeing you on top of him I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH

either that or having you below him is just *AAAAAAA*

G= Goofy (how serious are they)

he can be really really serious, but this man does crack jokes in the bedroom from time to time.

H= Hair (grooming habits)

he keeps himself pretty nicely groomed, cause yk carpet matches the drapes

and also i hc that he just feels gross if he doesn't

I= Intimacy (in the moment romantic or rough/dirty)

god oh god oh god

the can be *SO* rough, but during nights when he has you all to himself, it's slow, sensual,,,, mmmmmmm yummy

J= Jack off (do they masturbate and how often)

he does this whenever you're not around, but his right hand will never ever evah substitute for the feeling of your warmth clenching around him.

K= Kink (kinks what they like possibly unusual)

bondage, daddy, sadomasochistic power top, dom/sub vibes, possibly a little bit of wax play, definite knife play, coffee kink, mommy kink mommy kink mommy KINK, power play, size kink, choking kink, degradation/praise, roleplay

L= Location (where they like to get it on)

literally anywhere but prefers his bed or yours so he can tie you up

M= Motivation (things that makes them tick/turn ons)

you could probably wave to him and he'd be half hard, like baby you don't need to do anything just move two steps to the left and ur gonna get your pussy pounded

N= No (turnoffs or absolutely won't do)

he absolutely will not get you pregnant, bitch. you've got a world to save, he doesn't have time to be a dad.

scat, piss, vomit, necro, that type of stuff

O= Oral (receiving or giving and how skillful they are)

fuc-king hell he loves giving, but won't ever say no to a good ol' bj

P= Pace (how fast they are and how long they last in bed)

he can last a l o n g time.

he also won't change his pace unless you beg for it

Q= Quickie (do they prefer fast and hard)

he likes quickies, but really prefers to go nice and soft and slow with you

R= Risk (do they like to try new things)

he's open to it, but ya know he doesn't want to hurt you.

S= Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts)

im saying about ten or so and then he gets tired

T= Toys (are they game for using sex toys on themselves or lovers)

has a whole ass collection of bad dragon products to use on you

U= Unfair (how do they tease or do they enjoy suspense themselves)

oh lord this man will tease you until you are barely conscious..

"you like that little slut?"

the HEAVY breathing *UH*

when you do dominate him, he loves to be teased and will literally scream your name when you finally let him cum.

V= Volume (are they loud, what sounds, and do they talk)

definite heavy panting, but since he doesn't really have a filter he moans a lot too

he will degrade/praise tf outta you baby

W= Wild card (random sincannon of any sort)

okay but he wants you to top him.

he gets tired of topping sometimes and just wants to let you take over.

so do it, baby.

do it.

X= X-ray (what's down below in dem pants)

i'm thinking he's a little above average, 7 inches or so

thick, veiny, and a pretty pink head :>

Y= Yearning (sexdrive level)

he is ALWAYS horny and always looking for some way to grind against you or just fuck the shit outta you

Z= Zzzz (do they sleep after if so how quickly after)

so he falls asleep about an hour after because that's when his body just starts to shut down, but he doesn't realise that so sometimes he'll be standing upright doing something and then all the sudden you have to catch him bc he just fell asleep standing

#five hargreeves smut #7-up tag #7 up tag #number five smut #umbrella academy

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tweedlebugged · 1 year

Text

Squinting at the latest dndads episode suspiciously and poking it with a stick. Because on the one hand, it definitely feels like something sus is going on under the surface here and Anthony’s going to pull the rug out any minute now.

On the other, this is a show called Dungeons and Daddies and you kind of have to accept on admission that the characters can and will twist the logical rules of the universe into a pretzel in service of a really good goof. So there’s no way to tell right now what seems a little weird For the Drama and what seems a little weird For the Bit.

Take Jodie. Last season he was this badass demon and objectively the most put together dad, and now he’s this kind of pathetic loser trying to get back with his ex. His ex who he’s definitely been broken up with for over two decades at this point, given that he was already dating Scam during the Church of the Doodler stuff only a few years post season 1. And he was a really involved dad who is obviously disappointed in Nicky for not being part of Taylor’s life, but also he seems totally indifferent toward Hermie and pinches his nose when he has to be near him? It’s weird! And he acts so eager to use these kids and is VERY obviously trying to manipulate them—the whole chosen one thing tbh, and giving scary “secret” information and telling her she smells so super evil when she’s just…not lol—but then gets worried and tries to stop Scary when she does something that will actually hurt her. Officer Foster sir what the fuck is your deal?

But also—Jodie the cringe fail King of Hell is hilarious and Jimmy could just have been leaning into that new persona because it’s good radio. And it was! So who knows!

And Glenn. We know he canonically helped found DADDIES and was working to take down the Doodler (fighting at the Church, putting in the super fast elevator) and Nicky continued to be involved for years after, so clearly the Close/Foster family cared about the Doodler stuff at one point. So how did Glenn end up with the Doodler’s anchor and why is he maiming children to keep them from getting it? Children he should probably recognize and care about at least a little! (Although to be fair Taylor and Link are both still wearing skull masks)

But ALSO—and I say this lovingly—Glenn does have a slight history of being a selfish garbage man, and even though his character grew a lot by the end of season 1 it still wouldn’t be outside the realm of possibility for him to have looked around after his friends were gone, realized all of his loved ones were actually safe, and decided to fuck off to do cool things in hell instead. Especially after the other kiddads betrayed Nicky. Anthony did say that he’d let the players decide what happened to their characters, and while I don’t know Mr. Frederick Wong personally “fighting 666 demons in mega hell with the love of his life” does have the exact vibe of an ending he’d choose for Glenn.

So is Glenn under the influence of the anchor somehow? Is he actually one of the Likely family in disguise? Or is Freddy taking full advantage of being Glenn again to play out this character to its logical and EXTREMELY funny conclusion? Impossible to say!

And finally Agent Schmegan and the FBI. All that work hunting Nicky to the point that he had to abandon his family and stalking Taylor until they had an opportunity to draw out his dad, all so they could capture Nicky and torture him into letting them into hell. And now suddenly all they needed was text message permission from some random unrelated teenager and they could open a portal themselves? That’s fishy! And they had special weapons designed to take down Nicky, who said if they ever captured him his dads would be dead, but now Jodie can fight them all by himself without much issue? Feels a little like a scam, actually!

BUT ALSO—the 12 soccer players have been tied to the FBI since the FBI was introduced, and it makes sense to play out those stories at the same time. And since you can only go to hell once, bringing the FBI there now could take them out as a threat to Nicky. Which is more a narrative move than a comedy beat but would still be very funny when he loses his excuse to be an absentee dad and has to actually interact with Taylor. And his ex wife. And her new boyfriend.

This post isn’t going anywhere, the episode just reminded me why trying to theorize about Dungeons and Daddies is like trying to connect a conspiracy board with silly string (affectionate)

#I don’t know what’s happening here but I know I’m having fun watching it #dndads #dndaddies #dungeons and daddies #dndads glenn close #dndads jodie foster #nicholas foster #nick close #is there a better tag for him this man has too many names

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