#i mean lets face it probably not im just built to struggle ✌

[mrs-mikko-rantanen]

I dont think I'll actually be able to play hockey this year.

#im trying not to cry about that tbh #like #yeah #obviously i should learn to skate first #and yeah #obviously i should take hockey lessons first #i just #i wanna play hockey NOW #its #idk #i just see so many people who seem like theyre good at something with zero effort right off the bat #and ive never been good at anything right off the bat #and so like #eventually #im bound to be good at something right off the bat right? #i mean lets face it probably not im just built to struggle ✌ #i wanna play hockey so so so so so so so so so so so bad #i just want something to go my way fir once this fucking year #and i think part of it is the really sad truth of im in such a bad place mentally that future planning seems so pointless