#i miss my dog so fucking bad ive cried about her every day. i want to be with her. i want to be at home.

[anya-grace]

Hey, I read your Letters to Petra story last night and I couldn't stop crying. This one made me cry manly tears:

And Falco, that soft boy, he was always complaining about the orange strands of hair on my pillows. That was unfair. I needed more than just a strand of your hair. You could’ve shown yourself to me.

If you could write a mini story of Petra visiting Levi in his dreams that would be fantastic 👍

uhm,,, hello, hi 🥺 thank you for reading Letters for Petra 💖 i'm glad you cried char

knee waze, this fic might not be what you have in mind but please accept this 🥺🤲

-

five times petra visits levi in marley

i.

He was at the kitchen of his tea shop as per usual, opting to supervise the tea-brewing process instead and hiding his scarred face from the prying eyes of the customers when Falco entered and handed him a lavender-scented purple envelope.

"What is this?" He asked, leaving the pool of dried tea leaves that he was currently experimenting at.

"Uh...there was a customer outside. She didn't tell her name, but she told me to hand the envelope to Captain Levi."

His eyebrows shot up. He had never heard that title ever since he moved and settled in Marley.

Curiosity filled him as he asked the blonde boy the details about the customer. "You said she's a woman? What does she look like?"

And before Falco could answer, Gabi called from the front desk, seeking help with attending the new customers of his tea shop.

Opening the envelope, Levi saw familiar handwriting that he had never seen for the last five years.

Dear L,

Add some cinnamon to your tea. It's the secret of my blend.

- P.R.

ii.

It was a rainy day in Marley, and Levi's regular sightseeing every Sunday was interrupted by the heavy downpour.

"Tch, what a bitch." He murmured to himself as he grimaced on the mud on the wheels of his wheelchair.

It was only when he heard a soft giggle that he realized that he was accompanied by a woman under the thin roof in front of the small shop.

"I don't think there's something funny," he said gruffly. He couldn't fathom the expression of the woman because of the huge purple hat covering her face.

"You are funny, sir," the woman answered with a hint of amusement in her voice.

Maybe it was the sound of the heavy rain or the fact that it was almost ten years that he had never heard that voice, but slowly, Levi recognized it to be hers, and he wanted so badly to remove her big ass hat to see her face.

The rain stopped as did his heart, and he sat in his wheelchair dumbfounded as he watched the woman walk away from him.

He stared at the spot she left and he saw a yellow hanky on the ground. When he got home, he saw the letters P.R. sewn at the edge of the cloth.

iii.

His birthday wasn't a secret, but Levi doesn't go out of his way announcing to everyone that Hey, it's Humanity's Strongest Soldier's birthday today either.

It was when he received a bouquet on a Christmas morning - which was also the morning of his birthday, that the two brats knew this piece of personal information.

"Uncle Levi, someone sent you birthday flowers!" Gabi screamed from the hallway. While it usually irritated him, his thoughts were on who the fuck sent the flowers on his birthday.

"It says P.R.." Levi snatched the card from Gabi and the girl pouted and her eyes slowly widened, shining with glee.

"Ah! That's the same initials in the letter and the hanky you have in your room, Uncle Levi! Is she your girlfriend?"

Levi shot her a deadly look, "You snooping on my things, brat?"

iv.

One thing Levi loved with Marley (aside from the wide variety of teas and caffeine) was the peaceful community parks.

Although full of people most of the time, the Marleyans kept to themselves, doing their own thing like walking their dogs, exercising, and whatever shitty business they have at the park. This gave Levi some privacy, and a little break from his busy tea shop and the constant bickering of his two adopted brats.

He was enjoying the peace when a little boy poked his side with his dirty little fingers. Levi grimaced, a string of curses at the tip of his tongue, but he was suddenly presented with a piece of paper. He hesitantly took it, and the child ran away from him in a flash.

He saw his face on the paper. It was an illustration of him sitting in his wheelchair at the community park. At the bottom part of the paper were her initials again. Levi grazed his fingertips on the letters, and sure enough, he spotted a small figure with a sketchbook on her hands walking away from the park.

v.

Twenty years wasn't enough to forget the cruel memories of the war.

Every now and then, Levi Ackerman was visited by nightmares, the images of his fallen comrades and the faces of the civilians that he failed to save haunted him in his sleep.

It was a particularly bad night when he felt her touch. His cold body was wrapped in his thick blanket, and Levi murmured in his sleep as he tried to drive away the bad dreams.

He felt another weight dipped on his mattress, and before he could protest, he felt an arm on his shoulder, soft kisses on his forehead, and a familiar humming tone that soothes him and drove away all the madness inside his head.

The next morning, Falco complained about the strands of orange hair on Levi's pillows, and Gabi gave him a knowing look which registered in his brain as "You slept with Miss P.R. last night weren't you, Uncle Levi?"

#anya's fic #woah with the manly tears #i want to rewrite letters for petra so bad #rivetra #rivapeto #levi x petra #sorry anon if this is not what you have in mind 🤧 #thank you for the prompt 🥺 #thank you for reading my fic 🥺

[thegeminisage]

this is not a post for other people to put on their blog last time i said that some idiot reblogged it anyway. don’t be fucking stupid

anyway THEEE ways in which i am going to mcmurder my aunt. my aunt is like. she’s developmentally disabled so she’s like a little kid in a lot of ways, and she can’t help that, but she can help the fact that she’s like a BRATTY little kid, the BRATTIEST kid that ever existed. and so recently she developed coldlike symptoms which she said were allergies from having cut the grass. except then she said she felt like she was dying and then the next day she said she felt fine again. and she kept saying she didn’t have covid and she didn’t need a covid test, and because all of my relatives are tr*mp people, even though she’s not really able to understand politics she repeated what they’ve been saying, which is “if i go take that test they’ll MAKE me have it, they’ll say i have it even if i don’t,” and my mom and i weren’t even totally sure that she actually WAS sick at all, because a lot of times she likes to pretend to be sick when she isn’t (or sicker than she actually is) for attention, and she thinks ive gotten a lot of attention and “special treatment” recently because i have covid and we obviously Can’t have ANYONE, ESPECIALLY liz, getting more attention and special treatment than auntsname, because auntsname has to be the most specially treated person in the universe or that means nobody loves her

and so last night she called my mom sobbing into the phone saying she felt so bad, she was dying, she wanted her mother (who has been dead since 2010), her mother was the only person who could make her feel better now, and of course that activated both my mom’s grief and hysteria and sent her into a meltdown, and we finally got my aunt to agree to a covid test. and she went and took the test today - my mom had to drive her, and my aunt sat in the back so she could be on the side of the window, which meant she had to give herself the test. apparently she did every single thing possible she could to be difficult - they give you an alcohol wipe and tell you to put it aside for later, for cleaning the box, and not to let it touch your face, and she wrung it in her hands the whole time like a tissue. they told her to peel the packaging the swab came in and she peeled it all the way and just let the swab drop on the floor which forced them to give her a new one. she cried the whole time she stuck it up her nose because it huuuurt (it doesn’t hurt) and she couldn’t find the place to break and snap it off to fit in the vial so the people behind her had to wait and there was a huge line, the test took them more than 20 MINUTES to complete and it’s a fucking 5-minute ordeal

and then as soon as my mom dropped her back off at her house, she immediately asked for 1000 things to make her feel better. she wanted gatorade and ice cream and fried chicken and etc etc etc. like my mom doesn’t have enough to do without me around to take care of her. she wanted to know if my mom would take her dogs out for her 2-3 times a day if she wasn’t feeling good and started worrying about what would happen to them if she died and like. give me a FUCKING break??

first of all, you know who’s been taking OUR dog out while i had covid? me. my mom did it one time and he hurt her hand so i’ve been doing it ever since. HE’S NOT EVEN MY DOG. he’s my mom’s dog and i take care of him so she doesn’t have to. i cleaned my own cats’ litter tray. i’ve been making do with the groceries at home and telling my mom not to make special trips. i made half my own meals. hell, i did a load of DISHES. i’ve been telling my mom i really didn’t feel so bad even when i felt absolutely horrible. when i was trying to figure out what would happen if i kicked it i did not include my mom in that discussion because i didn’t want her to worry. i’ve been putting a brave face on it this WHOLE TIME because i didn’t want her to worry. i even did my mom’s groceries for the inventory at work like i usually do because it’s something i can do from the computer. i am about to get started on doing the schedule for her employees RIGHT AFTER I FINISH THIS POST. WHILE I HAVE COVID. to make her life easier!!! all of it was to be as little burden as possible even though i was the one with the plague! and then my aunt who only MIGHT have covid comes along and has to be THEEE hugest baby so she can be the BIGGEST burden and make my mom’s life as difficult as possible. she has absolutely succeeded in taking all the attention away from me because my mom has been super nice to me while i was sick and today she yelled at me for NO reason which means the ~special treatment~ i’ve been getting (not getting yelled at) is definitely over - you know who never gets yelled at by my mom? MY AUNT. she gets that special treatment 24/7 and she doesn’t even know it!!! 

and so now. my mom is telling me to check my temperature as often as i can. because she wants me out of quarantine as quickly as possible. and she says it’s because she’s worried about me and misses me and wants to know that i’m okay but it’s a big flip from “don’t rush it just take it easy” because. she wants me around. to help her take care of things again. because she can’t take care of work and the house and my aunt at the same time because my aunt is demanding 110% of her attention. so like i’m 36 hours fever-free which means i still have 36 more to go, but i’m already done being sick, not because i’m actually done being sick but because my aunt decided she was done letting other people matter. i HHHHHATE her and if covid doesn’t kill her i will. at least if i HAD died last week i wouldn’t be having to deal with her stupid bullshit AGAIN

#/ #// #/// #//// #///// #personal #covid blogging

[theycallmegothboy]

1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!

FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?  -spotify  2. is your room messy or clean? -it’s pretty messy i guess  3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey

4. do you like your name? why? -yeah it’s fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn it’s red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers  14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size?  -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5′6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but i’m saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but i’d smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being “smart” like fuck off lmao   39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy

40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear?  -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)  -it’s pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao  49. what was the last compliment you received? - “i belive in you, my son, you’re an amazing human being“ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -”no it’s a raccoon“ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like “oh yeah that makes sense“ i guess 52. what is your dream car?  -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no that’s nastyyy. weed? that’s fine i guess but wait till you’re like 18.  54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job?  -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?  -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?  -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles?  -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?  -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods?  -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons?  -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce?  -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed?  -wouldnt you like to know? ;))  66. have you ever won a spelling bee?  -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word “turmoil“ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word “owed“ as “ode“ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw?  -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw?  -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crush’s first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?  -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you?  -i dont know but i wear black a lot and that’s pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah  78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% “oh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!“ but i accept that there’s some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there aren’t. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment  81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor?  -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos?  -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos i’m gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules.  84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause it’s prettier  85. what shirt are you wearing?  -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who i’m around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if you’re out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left they’re fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so that’s sus but that’s where our cat came from so they can hang  guess, behind me they’re fine but their boys are loud, to the right they’re fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and he’s dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high?  -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk?  -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate?  -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -”not gonna waste my life, cause i’ve been fucked up“ 95. summer or winter?  -fall. fuck you 96. day or night?  -night but i like it when it’s actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month?  -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of?  -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, you’re the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/

felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope you’re happy with what you’ve done <3 <3

also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3

[racheljchen]

story vomit

-hong kong runaway idea reality in mental hospital? mr robot perfect blue -blue hour love "i wanna be scary" heart break shaves eyebrows red lipstick black panther for asians space? dreamjng of home story about learning to let go and putting yourself first story about choosing happiness, prolonged misery JYN AND CASSIAN IMMORTALS her fingers ruffled through soft locks of his hair, and her heart swelled. it was too little and too much all at once, after all the years apart, how could she have ever doubted wanting to be by his side again? Now that he was in her arms the certainty seemed to settle into an unshakable truth, that she and he were meant to return to each other, circling each other, standing by the other's side no matter the circumstances of the rest of the foolish world. the girl from before, who only knew of solitude, of running, looking over shoulder at every turned would have thought this new certainty unthinkable. it might have terrified her or disgusted her, but the Jyn of now was a different woman. his eyes caught her transfixed gaze and crinkled with a smile she knew better than her own. no words needed to break the cozy silence for the understanding to pass between them. there was nothing she wanted more than to crush his body to hers, to hold him gently and never let go again but the feeling overwhelmed her and she could only continue to cradle his head in her lap, stroking a finger down the jawline she loved. mine. mine. her heart said, touching a body that was not her own, this skin which would pierce me to be bruised, these bones which would shatter her to be broken. hours later, after many hushed words had passed between them, describing in few short words the many hard years that had passed for each of them, as the sky began to flush lilac with the rising  sun, they broke apart with much hesitance. after several failed attempts on cassian's part to urge her to the fresher for a much needed shower, she finally relented breaking the connecting touch betwen them. jyn couldnt contain the tiniest childish pout. how could she miss holding him within seconds of relinquishing the contact? annoyed at feeling like a childish teenager but still petulant to let go. "go!" urged cassian, his eyes crinkling with a grin, and then, of course how she resist grabbing his smiling face again and kissing those grinning lips. cassians arms could not help but to circle around her waist but of course he was the one with the greater self restraint and he withdrew them after a few moments, pushing her gently towards the fresher door. under the hot satisfying spray Jyn allower herself the luxury of a quick moment to just enjoy the comforts of a life not based on the next meal, next job, and the overhanging urgency of survival, before she got to work scrubbing off the unholy layers of grime on her body. as she lathered suds into her hair, the fresher door clicked open with a soft hiss, and she peered through the fogged shower door at cassian, who of course smiled at her again, and she marveled at the ease of his surrending unlimited smiles for her when he was a man of few smiles for the rest of the universe. and with that her traitorous heart was off again, squeezing with the overwhelming painful joy of having him by her side again. cassian rinsed his toothbrush, finished with brushing his teeth. with a mischievous grin he peeled of his under shirt and dropped his trousers to the floor. steam poured out of the fresher as he slipped in beside her, putting his rough hands on the soft slick skin of her waist. jyn hooked her arms around his neck and tiptoed up to kiss him, soft sweet and slow, and they stood under the spray, feeling each other up like teenagers until suddenly Jyn shrieked. "Ah! Sorry, sorry, the boiler tank is small, I've been wanting to install a bigger one-" Jyn laughed despite the freezing spray erasing her comfortable warmth by the second. "get out you horn dog i still have to rinse out my hair" one of them gets executed but comes back to life cassian? comes back to find jyn and their child // cassian as a fire breathing bar tender modern au where they're divorced drug cartel AU krennic and galen in the cia/dea jyn smuggles or deals arms or something cassian is an undercover DEA agent cassian riding a horse, wearing a cowboy hat, smoking patron notices cassian is into jyn and 'gives' her to him "you're a lucky guy" thats just a nice way to say i want to fuck your girl jyn if you do this i can't protect you ive known these guys my whole life and you think you can get into this game for a couple months and i need you to protect me from them i dont mean from them cassian joserra jerome antonio anglés andrez after they settle down: oh where did you guys meet jyn: tinder // divorced soulmates when they meet jyn can tell its something special. she's been around the block enough to know that this one wasn't for messing around, that they meant too much to each other. cassian tamed her and she brought him to life and his friends were all supportive of course, relieved he had found some joy at last, that he finally had a reason to leave the office without putting in overtime more days of the week than not, a reason for brief smiles to stsrt escaping his serious outward demeanor. all they saw was cassian hiding a smile in a tumblr of mezcal st the bar with them, watching jyn dance with han and kes, twirling around them with smooth confidence as they tried not to trip on their own feet. how could it be anything but good? jyn knows cassian would never hurt her on purpose so she lets herself fall too easily, then slowly her life revolved around him. he occupied her throughts, her space, and she became nothing more than a part of cassian, his wife, as honoured and respectable as the role was she became suffocated with being introduced as his wife, people telling her what a great man her husband was, and she became defined by him, strangers assuming insight of her. when she leaves she finds herself all alone, realising all the friends she had were gifted to her by cassian, and the thought infuriates her. not at cassian, never at cassian, but at her past self for allowing this to happen, blind to painfully learned lessons to always have an escape route in sight, to rely on herself first and foremost. when she leaves, the pain is unbearable. she cries and she cries herself to sleep, and when she wakes up she's temporarily soothed her mind betraying her with the false sense that all the pain was just a bad dream and she would roll over and see cassian there, soft and warm and comforting and ready to hold her close and kiss the nightmare away. but the realisation came quick and she would be sobbing again. in the end it was only her stubborn pride that saved her the indignity of crawling back to him on her knees begging. or maybe it was the stone pit on her stomach that said you did this. you hurt him like this, and for what? how can you deserve to try and salvage what was perfectly good before you picked it up and smashed it on the ground just to see how the splinters would fall? when the fog of misery starts to fade though, she is relieved. even as she sits in her crappy, hole in the wall apartment, eating left over pizza for a undignified amount of times in a month, she is so relieved to be free. even if the AC keeps crapping out and she's sweating in February and bodhi has been the only other person to visit her apartment she is so relieved. her thoughts were her own again and she was so happy she could cry "jyn you will always be my family. you know that right?" she doesn't deserve it cassian walking barefoot in the shore wash at blue hour this pain wasn't unbearable but it was a unique brand of torturous. knowing exactly what she wanted was right in front of her, seeing it, touching it in soft polite embraces that lingered just on the dangerous end of perfunctory hellos and goodbyes. she's already had a taste of exactly everything she wants (not needs, not anymore, and that made the pain tolerable but a new unique brand of torturous), and she couldn't have it. she threw it all away. no regrets could be had, she would have never made it here without giving it up, but it certainly didnt help when they sat on the opposite ends of the friends spanning a bar counter and her attention still strayed from whatever kes was talking about to start at his lips, soft  from worrying at the glass tumbler in his hand, hearing the memory of the laugh she only watched escape from him in real life as it was lost in the din of the bar. "i forgave you for literally tearing my heart apart the first time, but as much of a masochist as i am, I can't give you permission to do it again. so what is it jyn?" "come on jyn. it doesn't take an idiot to see how much we still care about each other" their scars are the only soft and tender part on them, new and innocent skin next to hard won calluses cassian's ex wife meet first time when cassian gets backup for his mission huge sexual tension competence porn celebrating successful mission, cassian shoots his shot she reveals she used to be in intelligence "understand this captain andor. i have a lot of respect for what you do. it's horrid work but it needs to be done. matter of fact i started in intelligence. but the one thing i know, is the kind of person that can stand that line of work, the kind of person i was back then, thats not the kind of people i want to break bread with" she pulls rank on him despite him being older and more experienced. "in my branch you get promoted fast because you die fast" cassian was being pessimistic/realist sbout expected bad outcome but young recruit is horrified more massive sexual tension at a bar or something, she goes outside to make out with some rando guy, cassian follows her and chases him off and kisses her. not nice and tender, hatefuck in an alleyway but it's so hot doesn't see each other again fuck in a tent, fuck in the showers start to bond, see each other's honour and kindess. after a bad mission she's doubting herself, unable to sleep, cassian takes her to a secret vantage point. "sometimes i think i'm a dispicable person" "not to me" he kisses her "what, really here?" where they're in constant threat of being walked in on "no." they just make out and its tender snd loving and it scares her off and she avoids him for a while cassian gets captured and held in solitary confinement for months, mentally tortured, starved. tries to escape, gets punished. gets fucked up in the head. draven and elkie are the only one pushing to find him and break him out.  after cassian is found and returns to base he's a shell of himself, spooked, makes intense eye contact with elkie as he passes her but no aknowledgement of their signifigance to each other. after medical checks he's left alone and starts to panic, but before he freaks out fully, she comes into his room with shaving kit and a peach. she cuts a few slices for him to enjoy because hes not really allowed fruit, talks to him and shaves him as he heals she arranges for him to be put in a room with a chatty old soldier who keeps telling him old war stories, and visits him whenever she back on base. after a particularly bad mission. she crawls into his hospital bed in the middle of the night. after he's discharged, she sleeps with him whenever she can, calming him down after nightmares. one night he knows she's sleep deprived and needing to wake up early for important things the next day and tells her to stop sacrificing her sleep to help him. she's quiet before she asks if he is making her leave. he says no, so she just snuggles up to him. he realizes she prefers being woken up all night to sleeping without him. one say when cassian's feeling like he cant stand being amongst the people on the base in the mess hall, she brings him back to the vantage point to have lunch. they fuck but it's making love. something in between she gets captured and tortured. breaks leg. cassian rescues her. cassian cares for her in the immediate aftermath, she wakes up to him asleep in the hospital chair after he comes back from his own mission back on base, superiors want to send her off base to recuperate and get better PT, she really doesn't want to go, she knows she might never make it back and lose her nerve and her mind. their sleeping in cassian's bed and she admits this. he says there's desk work she can do on base. "married officers get first choice of postings" she's stunned by the insinuation "i need to know you arent whoring yourself out out of some misplaced need to take care of me. just because you slept with me a couple times doesn't mean i'm your responsibility." "i need to know you aren't... offering... out of convenience. just a loophole to help me out" "i'm not. i can't live without you anymore" they get married, she takes his name. captain andor and captain andor she drops off the grid for an extended period of time, she sees him in a crowd and he thinks she's a hostile, tries to take her down but she takes off her mask and goggles she dies in his arms CASSIAN'S LITTLE SISTER/DAUGHTER cassian's 16 she's 8, he saves her and has to babysit her for a while around rogue one she's 18 starting to do field work as an agent cassian as fulcrum is not nice or friendly but mentors her and takes care of her she just starts acting like a friend even though she has no reason to treat him like one bonds with jyn they go to each other when they're concerned about cassian, jyn tells her about a miscarriage, she tells jyn about PTSD she doesn't want to admit to cassian later as peace becomes more viable and cassian less cold and jaded, he starts to act like her family and at first it scares her off a bit she's hostile, says you don't have any right treating me like a child considering how you treated me in the past CASSIAN JYN F1 bodhi jyn both trained by legendary race strategist galen erso (betrays imperial team and orson krennic?) bodhi was trained to to compete and be great, jyn was thrown in and not expected by others to be a real competitor jyn joins f1 with saw gerrera's partisans, low midfield team, strapped for cash bodhi drives with his brain jyn drives with her gut bodhi tells her she can be truly great when she masters melding the thinking and control with her raw talent jyn podiums once and is over the moon but cassian isnt happy for her and she doesnt understand cassian says she doesnt understand racing yet, put herself on the line for revenge, had no way of knowing she was gonna survive her dirty trick and she only won when almost half the field retired calls her hotheaded and not ready cassian was an excellent ruthless driver, would drive dirty to make the win very good (champion?) gets into bad crash (jyn saves him?) and retires, join rebellion as race strategist cassian suggests jyn as new driver leia backs him up jyn helps cassian with his PT and tells him he doesn't have to put on a mask for her and he allows himself to show that he's in pain jyn falls asleep in cassian's hotel room and when he tucks her in she grabs him and they fall asleep together at a party after a good win jyn's tipsy and grabs cassian and starts singing and dancing in his face and cassian is laughing and loving every moment jyn's championship title comes down to the last race she gets a rough bump that physically takes a toll on her she has a good lead but she blows a tire and limps home (krennic gets on the radio somehow to try and break her confidence?) cassian: "do your best, bring her home. i'm right here jyn, I'm with you to the end. I'm not going anywhere" jyn wins a championship and retires she's proved herself after no one thought she would, defeated vader for a season she knows she doesn't have a strong chance of doing it again and wants to make room for luke and han so they don't join imperial F1 STORY young hotshot female driver gets put into falling from glory ferrari with him he used to be eyed as the next great talent but in a shit car he doesn't have any accomplishments to show and is starting to lose the hype and his drive to win she idolizes him, after a race where she does very well for a rookie and he delivers good but not great results, she goes into his driver's room and congratulates him on a good drive out of a need to assert control he fucks her he's trying to massage his own shoulder, she says here let me help, get close, talking, he turns to catch her eye and realises how close they are and kisses her fucks her on the desk, hot and dirty after their lustful scramble he comes back yo his senses and is a bit ashamed of what he's done kisses her on the forehead and leaves, saying see you tomorrow they keep hooking up throughout her rookie season, and spending time together in the public eye, her sweet genuine humorous personality tempers his steely cold and focussed persona and media and fans eat it up, everyone loves them as old gruff dude and young hotshot jokester duo two seasons like that as they grow closer there's a picture of him as a f1 rookie giving 14yo her a trophy forehead kisses become a meme she tells him what he already knows, he needs to jump ship from the team he loves in order to win he signs with a top three team as she continues to get more experience at their old team throughout the season they continue hooking up and hanging out in winter break they spend a lot of time with each other, to the point it seems like they're dating but theyve never discussed it he wins a world championship, realises the only person he wants to celebrate with is her she gets signed to a title contender team next time they hook up he's being a tender and says something commitment related she freezes up "what did you think this is" "yeah of course anyone would jump at the chance to fuck their idols, that doesn't mean their idols would be a good person to settle down with" "did u think i would fall in love with you just because i look up to you? im not some groupie. as if you weren't just taking advantage of me the first time, cheating on your girlfriend. im smart enough to know I'm not special, if you did it to her you certainly have it in you to do it to me" "i think we should stop doing this" breakup, theyre both heartbroken he feels betrayed, thinking the girl he's in love with just used him she doesn't want to admit she really did fall for him he gets signed to the same team as her the whole world is super excited to see their chemistry again but they're super cold, barely together, barely acknowledge each other press conference she blows off the question of whether she's excited to be teammates again he gets into tabloids rumored to be dating hot celebs they have a bad rivalry on the track fighting for positions gets double retirement and other bad things eventually he realises she only pushed him away out of self preservation and she mist have loved him to have done so much and cared for him the way she did he apologizes and asks her to give them a chance she's shocked but she agrees, but she says they shouldnt be together until the season is over cue sexual tension she misses him too much and he comes into her hotel room to get a fright shes in his bed and they cuddle she wins the championship after 5 years of being together and racing, he retires proposes to her, to the shock of the world

[ohtheseboysilove]

Sexy panties to dirty nappies [Ben Hardy x F!Reader] IV

Words : 4, 200 K +

Warnings : angst, fluff, smut

Summary :  Reader is eight months pregnant. The only problem ? She just find out. Yep, pregancy denial. Now, they only got one month to be ready for the baby. Ready…steady…go !

Note : Not you’re not dreaming !!! The new chapter is here after 16325 years of waiting !!! I think we got two maybe three more chapters before the eeeend

🌼Request are open🌼☀ Masterlist ☀

“It’s impressively well-done for a fake pregnant belly”

“It’s a real one”

“I mean look at the details and all, I can’t see the strap to take it off! ”

“I told you it’s my real skin, you dummy”

“You’re almost convincing sweetheart but you can’t be– holy shit ! Your fake stomach just fucking kick me !”

“Joseph, for the tenth times, I’m pregnant and the kick you just felt, it’s our baby girl” You scoffed as the ginger man looked at your belly with wide eyes.

“But– I saw you in a thigh dress last month, I’m sure I wouldn’t have missed your...” He gestured to your swollen abdomen. “...imposing hum state”

You and Ben had currently some of your closest friends at your place and they were all shocked by the new but they mostly congratulated you for the baby’s coming. Joe couldn’t believe the pregnancy’s denial thing, not that he thought you were lying, he just had a hard time to process.

“Do you have any idea for a name ?” Lucy asked with a soft smile.

You and Ben glance at each other, whining a bit.

“Not really. I love Lottie but Ben don’t want it” You pouted childishly.

“It’s not even a name ! It’s basically Charlotte’s nickname but you don’t like Charlotte, it’s not my fault baby” Ben chatted back before tacking a sip of his beer, earning a roll of eyes from you. “You don’t like any of my idea, you had reject every name I proposed !”

“We’re not calling our daughter Esmeralda, Ben” You huffed as you lay back in the sofa, wiggling to find a comfortable position. “And Isabella is out too, I’m not giving my kid the name of the dumbass from Twilight” Joe snorted and shook his head, patting Ben’ shoulder.

“These names are rather lovely (Y/N)” Commented Gwilym with a shrug.

“Didn’t ask for your opinion Lee” You scoffed and snatched the crisp’ bowl from his hand, munching loudly the snack.

“Don’t worry, the hormones drove her mad, she’s mean with everyone Gwil” The blond winked at the brown-haired man. “She’s probably gonna cry in less than half an hour”

“Piss off Benny” You mumbled, moving like a worm on the sofa, the baby was jumping around your belly and the task of relaxing was nearly impossible. “What about Mina ? It’s cute”

“I love it” Lucy and Gwil nodded enthusiastically, Joe just shrugged.

“Nah, I’m not fan” The blond scratched his chin, thinking about other names. “Kelly ?”

“Urgh, no way. I was bullied by a Kelly in school, she was a real bitch” You shook your head, a hand massaging your swollen belly. “Ophelia?”

Your boyfriend whined and you sighed dramatically. The brainstorm for a name continued for a good twenty minutes, everyone proposing a name until you and Ben found one you both agreed on.

“Ellie. It’s perfect” You smiled and Ben smiled back, both of you reassured to find a name before the arrival of your daughter. “It’s short and adorable”

“Well done Gwil” Lucy gave a thumb up as he smiled proudly for finding the name.

“Mine was better” Grumbled Joe with a childish pout. “You could put as a her middle name”

“Ellie Skywalker Jones” Ben nodded and glanced at you “What’s do you think babe ?”

You raised your middle finger to the two men before wrapping protectively your belly with your arms.

“I think neither of you will be allowed in the hospital for the birth, I don’t trust any of you”

**

After a promise of paying the restaurant’s note next time you all going out, your friends accepted to help you to get the baby’s room ready. You were painting one of the wall in a light blue as was Lucy, both of you chatting during your task.

Joe and Ben were trying to find a way to put together the crib which it and more baby’ stuffs had arrive earlier during the day.

“So...do you feel ready for the baby hon ?” You stopped your movements and glanced at Ben who was already looking at you. You both knew the answer.

“Fuck no” Gwilym, Lucy and Joe laughed at your perfect synchronisation and Ben winked at you.

“But it’s not like we have any choice...it’s gonna be hard but we will find a way, right Benny ?” You asked and smiled lovingly when the blond stood up to plant a sweet kiss on your lips.

“Of course, baby. We can manage a little human, million of people do it, so we can do it too” He ignored the exaggerated aaaawwwww of Joe and pressed a second kiss, on your nose this time. “But maybe you should rest for a bit now. You have been standing for hours baby” He gave you his famous puppy-eyes and for once, you didn’t object.

You hummed in agreement and sat in the rocking-chair, giving some rest to your swollen ankles. Ben smiled with relief and went back to the crib as Gwilym was hanging few decorations above it, following your instructions.

“I was wondering guys...since you’re not going to the concert next week, can I have your tickets ? I met a really pretty girl the other day and if–“

“What ? What concert ?” You cut Joe with a frown.

“Queen + Adam Lambert, did...did you forget ?” Gwilym looked at you and Ben’s dumbfounded faces and get his answer.

“Holy shit, is it next weekend ? I completely forget it !” You slapped your forehead with shock. This surprise baby made you forget the concert you were waiting for practically a year. “Fuck, I will be still pregnant for the gig !” You stood up and cursed loudly, looking dramatically at Ben. “What are we going to do ?”

“What do you mean ? We’re not going, baby” The blond stated the situation like it was the most obvious answer ever. You scoffed, outraged by his reply and he shook his head, feeling the fight coming. “(Y/N), you’re eight months pregnant, you’re not going to any concert”

“But it’s Queen ! I’m waiting for that since I’m a little kid !” You reacted like a brat but honestly, the only thought of missing the gig made your blood boiled. “I’m going !”

“You’re not going anywhere” Ben snapped and crossed his arms, looking firmly at you. “Joe, you can have our tickets, there are in the kitchen, behind the echography of Ellie”

Lucy and the two boys looked awkwardly at each other at your bickering and quietly exited the room to let you both speak alone.

“Joe, you better don’t touch my ticket !” You warned as he shook his head and closed the door behind him. “I’m going Ben, I don’t need your permission” You humphed angrily and finished to put the big cloud sticker on the wall, ignoring Ben’s deep sigh.

“(Y/N), don’t be stupid please. We have standing’s tickets, you can’t go in crowd and stand for three hours in your state” You knew he was right but his tone was annoying you. He was scolding you like if you were a kid. “Be serious for a minute, I want to go too but I’m not going because you can’t”

“But I want to go” You whined and felt tears watering your eyes. You hated crying but since you were pregnant, every little thing that upset you, also made you cry. “I’m sure we can exchanged our standing tickets for seating tickets...”

“I said no, it’s too dangerous ! Jesus, stop being so childish (Y/N), for fuck’ sake ! We’re going to have a baby, if you don’t want to be a bad mother, you need to grow the hell up” Your lower lip was trembling after Ben’s harsh words, trying to suppress your sobs. The blond cursed and immediately regretted his words. “No, babe, I’m sorry. That’s not what I wanted to say, I–“

“Save it Ben” You cut him, coldly and made your way out of the baby’s room, sniffling quietly.

You were hurt. Very hurt. His words stung in you like poison, you were already doubting about your capacity of being a mum and now it was even worse. The rest of the flat was empty, your friends probably left at the uncomfortable situation. Great.

“Baby, please. Forgive me, I didn’t mean any of this. I’m just fucking nervous” Ben pleaded as he followed you in the kitchen. “I’m sorry” You ignored him and graciously wiped your nose with your – Ben’s – jumper’ sleeve before grabbing a cookie’s box, crunching one of them angrily. “Babe, talk to me, please”

“Fuck off” You replied and made your way to your room, slamming it in Ben’s face and carefully locking it behind you.

“(Y/N), let’s talk about it, you can yell at me as long as you want” He knocked on the door but you stayed silent. You muffled your cries with your hand and slid in your bed, feeling exhausted. Hormones were amplified all of your emotions and maybe you were overacting a bit but you couldn’t control yourself. For now, you were vexed. “Baby, I’m sorry, I really am. Please, let me in”

Ben’s voice was sounding lower as you slowly drifted into sleep, mouth half-parted as small snores echoed in the room.

**

When you woke up, you were feeling much better. Hungry and craving for cuddles. You felt stupid to react so dramatically, Ben would never hurt you on purpose and he wasn’t totally wrong about what he said. He was a bit clumsy with his words but he didn’t mean any hurt. You unlocked the door and went looking for Ben, walking frankly around the messy flat.

“Ben ? Frankie ?” You heart started racing violently as the thought that he left you all alone. That it, he had enough with you and left you and the baby.

You put a hand on your chest, feeling it raising quickly under the anxiety. You started crying and kept calling Ben’s name with a weak voice. You were ridiculous, deep inside, you knew he didn’t leaves you but your emotions were all over the place, messing badly with your rational mind. After five long minutes of more sobbing and intense fear, – raising a baby all by yourself ? Nightmare – the front door open.

“In, Frankie. Good girl” Ben cooed as the dog immediately ran to you, her little tail wagging excitedly. “Baby, what’s wrong ?” the blond looked at you worriedly and quickly closed the door before joining you on the sofa.

“You’re back” You murmured with round, teary eyes that made Ben’s heart melted.

“Of course, I’m back, baby. ‘ Was just walking Frankie” His big, warm hands flew to your wet cheeks, brushing it softly. “I’m not going anywhere, I already told you that (Y/N), you stuck with me forever, you and little Ellie” He pressed his lips on yours, several times as you sighed with relief, your fingers clenching around his forearm. “I brought you this veggie burger from Byron that you love so much” He added in a whisper, his mouth curled in a cheeky smile.

“With sweet potatoes ?” You asked with the sweetest, hopeful voice, Ben’s chuckling softly at your tone.

“Two portions of sweet potatoes for my pretty girl” He confirmed and you kissed his cheeks, wiping your wet eyes with a hungry smile. “I’m gonna make your plate, ‘kay ?” You nodded and he disappeared in the kitchen, Frankie immediately stealing his spot.

You scratched her ears with a loving smile while she rolled on her back, exposing her tummy for some more rubbing, her cute little pink tongue poking out. The blond came back, two plates on his hands before putting the little stool, to rest your feet on, in front of you. The sight of the deliciously greasy burger made your stomach grumbled loudly. You both silently ate your dinner, Ben stealing you soft glances from time to time, your plate resting on the top of your round belly as you eagerly stuffed your mouth with chips.

“About what I said earlier...”

“No, Ben, let’s forget that okay ? You were right, I acted like a little bitch, I was being stupid” You took a large sip of your soda and waved him off, licking your greasy fingers.

“Hey, I shouldn’t have talk you like this either, ‘m sorry baby” His plump lips pressed on your shoulder, making you smiled inevitably.

You wiped your fingers into a napkin and slid them on his cheeks, bringing in face to yours, kissing him cheekily. Ben moved the plate from the top of your tummy and pushed him away somewhere on the coffee table without breaking the kiss. You sat on his lap, bowing your neck to keep your lips connected, trying to ignore the soreness of the gesture but with your massive body between the two of you, it wasn’t really easy.

Ben lips trailed down your neck, nipping at your skin as you softly gasped at the nice sensation. But then little Ellie decided to wake up, giving this steamy moment a weird dimension. The baby was pretty energetic, kicking hard until Ben stopped, sighing.

“Is it only me or you also find weird to make out when this little cockblocker is awake ?” He narrowed his eyes, looking suspiciously at your swollen belly.

“Definitively” You pouted and let a light peck on his cute nose before getting back on your spot, your hand rubbed on your tummy. “Shush baby...aren’t you a jealous little thing ? Not letting your mama getting a well-deserve quickie on the sofa, that wasn’t really nice” You cooed at your belly, your daughter kicking back even harder at the sound of your voice.

“Can’t wait to have this little girl out of her Mummy because this is my spot, and I don’t like sharing” He gave you smug smile and avoid the cushion that you threw to him. “What ? I’m sick of using my hand, didn’t jerk myself off that much since high school. Miss our long, hot night of sex very much” He whispered the last sentence into your ear, bringing a shiver down your spin.

You whined. Loudly.

“Me too baby. God, that awful, I’m so horny and I can barely move” You cried as your gently tugged on Ben’s hairs. His gorgeous lips teasing you as he ran a tongue on it.

“As soon as we have a night just for ourself, m’ gonna take care of you, no cockblocker and no big belly to stop me this time” He brushed his lips against your lobe and moved away, his eyes matching your excitation. “Soon, baby, soon”

You nodded with a pout and grabbed back your plate, munching your burger as you ignored the knot of desire in your lower belly.

“Do you want my pickle ?” His fingers wiggled the large american pickle in front of your lips, mouth twitching up in a cocky smile. “It’s leaking, wanna taste ?” You knew he was teasing you and he was having too much fun with his dirty talk, he rubbed the head of the pickle on your closed mouth, knowing damn well that the baby was too awake to do anything right now.

His amused face turned into a most serious one when you decided to play his game too, giving a kitten lick on the pickle, your doe-eyes looking right him innocently. You hummed appreciatively and chuckled as his Adam’s apple bobbed visibly. You wrapped your lips around the vegetable, sucking on it with exaggerated noises only destined to frustrate him more. His cheeks were becoming pink at your gestures, his free hand sliding into his pants, palming himself at the sight, imagining your lips wrapped around him rather than this stupid pickle.

“You like that Ben ?” You murmured in a slutty voice, trying your best to not burst in laugh at his flustered state. Men were really weak. He nodded softly, groans leaving his parted mouth as his cock was throbbing in his hand, begging for some release. You put back your lips and moaned loudly around it, your hands pressing on his thighs cockily. “That what you get when you tease me, you twat” You crunched on the pickle and moved back, giggling at his wide eyes and burning face.

“You’re...the devil, woman” He chocked out in a strangled voice, stopping the movements of his hand. You stole the rest of the pickle and ate it nonchalantly, ignoring his pleading look. “Babe” He rubbed his nose on your neck. “Baby” He whined against your skin, his hot breath tickling you. “Please, my love. Need you. So badly” He caught your hand and pressed it onto his boner, showing you how much he needed you.

“Humm, what do I get if I land you a hand ?” You purred with a cheeky smile, your fingers brushing on his hard-on.

“Everything you want baby, please” You grinned in satisfaction and pressed your lips on his jaw, biting it slightly as your hand wrapped around his length, earning a loud gasp.

“Alright, you owned three girl nights once the baby is born, whenever I want” You glanced at him and he rolled his eyes but nodded anyway, he slid down his jeans and underwear, exposing his magnificent purple-head cock to you. “And you give me a massage tonight” You added with a smirk, your thumb teasing the top of his leaking dick. Ben sighed uncomfortably at your sweet torture and nodded eagerly, his hips bucking into your grip. “And a real massage baby, not a five-minutes-and-im-too-tired one ! With the relaxing oil I bought last–“

“Jesus (Y/N) !Yes, yes, yes ! Everything you want baby, can you just jerk me off ?” His head was threw back in the sofa, eyes closed and face twisted in need.

“So romantic my love” You joked and slowly started moving your hand up and down, nails slightly grazing on him, bringing your lips back on his neck. “How do that feel ?”

“So good baby. So so so good” He whimpered as your other hand went on his balls, massaging them gently. “Shit, how can you hand be so much better than mine ?” The blond kept his eyes shut, chest panting as his release was quicky building.

“For the same reason than I prefer your fingers in my pussy rather than mine” You murmured against his lips, grinning at his long and deep moan. “Feel so nice when you touch me, always hitting the right spot” You bit his bottom lip, quickening your speed around his cock.

“God, I love this dirty mouth of yours” He breathed as he opened his lust-filled eyes. “Kiss me” You pressed a simple kiss on his mouth, earning a disapproval groan from your boyfriend. “A real– fuck, a real kiss baby”

“I taste like pickle Ben” You giggled and wrinkled up your nose. “Yuck”

“Like I fucking care, gimme a kiss baby” You happily complied and slid your tongue into his mouth, adding some pressure on his hard member as you other hand flew back on his neck. “Oh my– feel so good! I’m gonna cum baby! Shit shit shit !” He sang in a high pitched voice as you praised him until he jerked in your hand with a throaty groan.

You wiped your hands covered in sticky cum on Ben’s shirt who gave you a dirty look but didn’t say anything. You just jerked him off, knowing you wouldn’t have any release in return, he better kept his mouth shut.

**

Few days later you were doing your exercise of the day : Walking to the elevator, get in it, walking even more graciously to the box letters, grabbed the mails and then going back to your flat in the same way. It was noting but it made you sweated and groaned every time.

You sat – more like grovelled – into the sofa, patting a sleepy Frankie and looked over the mails, putting the bills on the table with a grimace. You made your way to Ben’s office, dropping his work mails on the desk but your eyes fell on a large envelop, with the name of his agent on it. You furrowed your brows and took the envelop, wondering what it was. You curiosity would kill you one day.

“I hope for you Benjamin Jones that I’m wrong and it’s not what I think it is...” You mumbled with annoyance, trying to see through the envelop.

Ben had the bad habit to accept projects before talking to you, to avoid a drama. We ask for forgiveness, not for authorisation. But now you had a baby coming very soon and if you found out this asshole was away for a photo shoot or an interview somewhere else than in London...someone gonna be in big troubles. You were becoming angry and scared. He wouldn’t do that, he couldn’t. Now you were pacing in the room, trying to relax and not becoming too paranoiac. Too late. You grabbed the envelop and looked for the little knife that Ben used to opened his mails.

“Watcha doing ?” You dropped everything on the floor with a loud gasp, catched red-handed. Ben smirked at your guilty face, walking to you. “What did I do for you to search through my boring work stuffs hum ? That not where I keep the naughty photos my fans send me, you know that” He joked before placing a kiss on your hair, rubbing gently your belly.

This wanker came back from the gym quicker than you expected.

“And why are you trying to make go in early-labour, you ass” You groaned in a loud breath, heart beating quickly from the scare he just gave you. The blond chuckled, clearly picking on your mood but he was used to it now. “What is in this envelop ?” You shook it in front of your boyfriend’s face.

“Hum...nothing” The british lied and quickly grabbed the mail from your hand, taking it away.

“Benjamin! What is it ?” You slapped his chest to make him drop the envelop but he shook his head, refusing to tell you.

“Nothing baby, I swear ! Just boring work” He smiled innocently to you and it made you even more upset.

“Oh my god Ben ! Tell me ! You better not leave the city during the first year of  your daughter’s life or I’m gonna castrate you !” You shoved an angry finger in his chest before pinching roughly one of his nipple, making him gasp painfully.

“Fuck (Y/N) ! You hurt me” He whined like a child but at least you get the mail back in your hand. You smirked at him and started to open it under Ben’s annoyed gaze. “Okay, go on, you minx, ruin my surprise” The blond crossed his arms and rubbed his torso, mumbling about his nipple hurting.

You chewed your lips in hesitation, maybe it was really a surprise and you were just acting bratty. You sighed and gave him back the mail, half opened. You pouted and walked away, hormones making you crazy. You wanted to cry, to yell or just taking a nap you didn’t know. But the envelop was still in your though, making you wondering too much. And Ben being the perfect boyfriend he was, knew that too. That why he came sit next to you on the sofa, handing you the mail.

“I wanted it to be a surprise until the last minute but I know you gonna drive yourself mad with this, so here, open your present” You squealed in excitement, sending him the wider smile ever. “But please don’t go in early labour, that would literally ruin my present” He added, throwing an arm around your shoulders.

“Can’t promise anything Benny” You crutched your nose, taking out two shiny pieces of paper from the mail, eyes practically popping out of your face. “No, you didn’t ! Oh my god Ben !” You let out a scream in high-pitched voice and the blond covered his ears as the sound but a satisfied smile was on his lips.

It was two tickets for a Queen + Adam Lambert concert but this time, it was not standing but seating tickets, on a private balcony, much better for a very pregnant woman. You quickly wiped away the few tears on your cheeks and grabbed Ben’s neck, kissing his mouth several times, babbling several thank you.

“I’m glad you’re happy, baby” You buried your head into his neck, his large palms rubbing your swollen belly, his head on yours.

“I though you didn’t want me to go with little Ellie” You murmured against his skin, feeling overwhelmed by love for this incredible man.

“Well, it way safer tickets and it’s probably the last very exciting thing we’re gonna do before the baby so...yeah, let’s go see Queen” He replied with an amused tone.

“You’re damn right, Jones” You put your hand over his, both of you giggling at the kick from little Ellie “See, she is very excited too ! Baby girl gonna dance with Mommy on saturday night !”

Ben gave you a warning look and you pinched your lips, amused.

“Or we can just occasionally wiggle on our seat to not worry daddy to much” You added with an innocent smile.

“Much better” Ben agreed with a grin.

**

Tag list :  @ixchel-9275 @jennyggggrrr

#ben hardy x reader #ben hardy x you #ben hardy #ben x reader

[selfship-uncharted]

The Fugitive part XII

part I - part II - part III - part IV - part V - part VI - part VII - part VIII - part IX - part X - part XI - part XII - part XIII - part XIV

A/N: Thank you so much as always for your support! A/N2: English is not my first language. Pairing: Arthur Morgan x OC (Claire Russell) Warnings: a little angst, violence, sexual assault (not explicit), blood Words: 3,250 (Geez... that’s not like me at all :’) ) Tags: @asiramhera @missdictatorme @zoilalove213   @avast-you-dirty-dog @lowkeyofsassguard

Special thanks to @asiramhera for being my beta-reader. Tons of love for you!

The sound of the key opening the cell woke them up. The headache instantly made its appearance, more on her than on Arthur.

She blinked several times before seeing that it was her cell that was being opened.

In front of her, there was a policeman, behind him, Theodore looking at her with severity.

Even though her headache pained her strongly she stood up quickly. Arthur stood up too, holding firmly the bars between them staring at the newcomer.

Theodore walked in the cell, Claire instinctively walked away from him bumping against the wall feeling his intense gaze analyzing her.

The silence between them was suffocating her, her heart was beating fast ready to break her chest, she didn't expect Theodore to go get her in prison, she hoped they would be free to go in the morning and just reach home like nothing ever happened.

Claire with fear dared to look at her husband not knowing what he would do. She didn't have to wait longer. Theodore outraged slapped her violently making her fall on the ground.

"You son of a bitch!" Arthur shook the bars with impotence wanting to punch that bastard.

Theodore briefly looked at Arthur but ignored him. He got close to Claire and took her arm and dragged the girl out of the cell.

"I hope this will be enough to close the matter." He gave some bills to the policeman to buy his silent about Mrs Cornwall having spent the night in prison. The policeman grabbed the bills and nodded.

Arthur saw powerless how Theodore took away Claire, knowing that nothing good might happen to her. He kicked frustrated the bars that didn’t let him go.

Then, Arthur heard Theodore's voice excusing himself after distinguishing the sound of a thud. He had bumped into Hosea, who apparently was coming to get Arthur out of prison. The old man noticed Claire and was ready to salute her but she was too self-absorbed to see him and he decided it was maybe not a good time.

Theodore opened the door of their coach and pushed Claire in it, he jumped behind her and closed the door. He hit the ceiling of the coach with his cane to order the driver to take them home.

Claire was scared, she could easily tell that Theodore was irate, he was so tense, Claire had never seen him like that and she didn't know what he might do to her.

"I didn't want to believe my father's words..." He started chewing every word. "He told me you were a whore... It seems he was right." Theodore in a fast movement grabbed Claire's hair making her head lean backwards. "I've tried to be good to you. I've given you all the space you wanted, I tolerated all your caprices, I let you spend our fortune how you please without a word, and this is how you repay me? Betraying me, making fun of me with a buffon, a stray dog?"

"You are hurting me..." Claire involuntary protested trying to free herself from his grip.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Mrs Cornwall!" Theodore tone was completely sarcastic, even evil.

Theodore threw Claire to the front bench, holding her wrists strongly. "I asked you for one thing. One. Simple. Thing." He took her wrists in one hand while she tried to get rid of him kicking him, but he was already between her legs. "And you are going to give it to me the good way or the bad." He lifted her skirt.

"No!" She cried. "Get your fucking hands off me, you fucking bastard!"

"Shut the fuck up!" He slapped her even harder than he did in prison. "You stay still."

Claire's eyes were filled with raged tears, she bit her bottom lip, she didn't want to cry in front of him, she didn't want to give him that pleasure.

"He is way more gentle..." She started with a tremble in her voice but looking straight up into his eyes. Theodore stopped unbuttoning his pants and looked at her puzzled. "When he kisses me, every part of me is burning from desire..." She knew she was playing a dangerous game but she was determined to piss him off as much as she could. She was not going to enjoy it and neither would he. "And when he gets inside of me..."

"Shut up." He warned her grabbing her face, squeezing her cheeks.

"I can't wait for him to impregnate me with his seed." She spat out with hatred.

"You fucking whore!" He slapped her several times with fury while she cried in pain. With her blood rolling down her chin from her lips she helpless saw how he ripped her shirt exposing the underwear, ready to remove that annoying corset.

Suddenly the door was wide open and a hand took hold of the backside of Theodore collar and dragged him out of the coach.

Claire panted recovering her breath and trying to understand what was happening. She got out of the coach and saw Arthur straddling Theodore punching him not leaving him time to recover from every fist he received in his face.

"You son of a bitch! Don't you dare put your hands on her ever again!"

Claire looked around her, they weren't in Saint-Denis no more, they were so busy fighting each other that they didn't realize that the coach changed its speed and its direction.

"Arthur, stop! You are going to kill him!" Claire turned around to see Hosea on his horse and holding the reins of Arthur's horse.

"You piece of shit..." Arthur released Theodore from his grip letting him fall nearly unconscious on the ground obeying Hosea.

Claire looked at her husband, his face was completely covered in blood, he was whining from pain, he was pathetic.

"You all right?" Arthur cupped her face to make her look at him.

She just nodded covering herself with trembling hands. She bent down her head to hide her tears that been falling for a while. Arthur noticed the blood coming out of her lips, her red cheeks from all the slaps and pressed his jaw in anger, if he saw that earlier he would have hit Theodore even harder.

"It’s okay now..." He whispered pulling her to him. "I got you. I got you..."

The second time he said that it was softer than the first, making Claire bury her face in his chest, trying to put her mind in blank to forget what just happened and feel safe in his arms.

"I'm afraid I might interrupt," Hosea cleared his throat grabbing Arthur’s attention. "But we should get out of here, I don't think the police will take long to get here."

Arthur then realised that he actually didn't have a plan, he looked at Claire thinking of what to do, where to take her, she returned the glance with a plea in her eyes and tightening her grip on his arms. She didn’t want to come back to that city.

Hosea sighed with impatience. "It's obvious you have to take her to the camp, she can't go anywhere else after this..." He pointed Theodore with his chin.

Theodore was crawling in pain in the ground and reached for the hem of Claire's long skirt. She stepped back instinctively releasing herself from his grip.

"Claire... You are mine..." He whimpered being unable to stand up. "If you go with him... You are dead to me."

How dare he? After all he did to her? Those last few days have been a nightmare for her. Claire looked at him with bitterness and pity, she closed her fists in hatred.

"So be it..." Claire took off her wedding ring and threw it to him. She didn't wait for any reaction of him, she went to Arthur's horse and mounted it.

"Are you coming?" Claire was holding the reins waiting for Arthur to get on the horse.

Hosea looked at her with a smile of amazement. He liked that woman.

***

Shady Belle was a big abandoned manor that the Van der Linde gang was using as a camp. Around the mansion there were several tents, some bonfires were litten and people sat around them keeping them alive.

The horses stopped before getting into the camp. Arthur helped Claire to get down the horse, Arthur saw her looking around her with insecurity.

“It’s all right, Claire.” He said softly. “You are safe.”

They walked into the camp, Arthur’s arm around her shoulders but his eyes checked his surroundings like looking for someone.

Claire noticed some curious eyes going to her, there were many kinds of people there. Even a little toddler who ran to his mummy's skirts asking who was that strange lady.

“Mr Morgan!” an old lady come to them with surprise in all written in her face. “What is this all about?”

“Miss Grimshaw, this is Claire…” Arthur cleared his throat. “Russell. Mrs Russell.” He quickly looked back at Claire then turned to Miss Grimshaw again. Miss Grimshaw inspected Claire, her awful image, the blood in her lips, the red cheeks, the state of her dress. “Could you please….”

“Of course!” She said raising her hand to make him say no more. “Come with me, child.”

Miss Grimshaw took Claire by her shoulders and dragged her away from Arthur. Claire instinctively turned around to see him.

“Be with ya in a moment.” He reassured her.

“I’m going with her.” Hosea tapped Arthur’s shoulder and walked with the two women.

Arthur nodded. “I’d better talk to Dutch...” He fixed his hat and went to the gang leader room inside the manor.

***

Miss Grimshaw took Claire to one of the tents, and invite her to sit on a chair.

“Tilly!” She yelled. “Need some help her’!”

A beautiful black young girl appeared seconds later.

“Yes, Miss Grimshaw?” She eyed Claire from tip to toe surprised to see a stranger in the camp.

“Assist Mrs Russell to get herself clean and take care of that horrible wound.” Miss Grimshaw’s order was quickly executed. Tilly delicately cleaned Claire’s lip wound as the trace of mud in her face from the riding to the camp.

Tilly discerned the sorrow in Claire’s eyes. They were red from crying, her cheeks were still burning from the slaps. She felt sorry for her even though she didn’t really know what happened to her.

***

Arthur went upstairs to find Dutch in his room standing by the window holding a book. He didn’t seem to have any interest in the book since he was looking through the window.

“Who is she?” Dutch asked not bothering to turn to Arthur, his eyes locked outside the house.

“The news sure run fast.” Arthur chuckled nervously, he wasn't sure why he felt so agitated, he was afraid maybe Dutch would get angry to him having brought a stranger to the camp even if they did that quite often, but now it wasn’t the right time to bring more people in, or that he might make it more difficult for her bringing her here.

“I remember her.” Dutch was looking to where Claire was. “Mrs Russell, isn't it?”

“Yeah…” Arthur’s sight fell on the floor.

“I can't help myself but ask how you two met.” He closed the book he was holding and turned to see Arthur's reaction. “Don't get me wrong, son. I don't see how a woman of her status would mix it up with…”

“Someone like me?” He smirked bitterly.

“Let's just say, with outlaws.” Dutch clarified himself.

“Long story….” Arthur sighed.

***

“Everything good, ladies?” Hosea Matthews stepped in the tent going by Claire’s side resting his hand on her shoulder to reassure her. “It’s okay, child. You are safe with us.”

“What happened?” Tilly couldn’t help but ask.

Claire pressed her jaw and looked away at her memories. She could still feel Theodore’s grip in her wrists.

“Her husband was... badly beating her.” Hosea explained patting Claire's shoulder, feeling her going tense.

“The poor girl!” Gasped Tilly. “Don’t worry, Mrs Russell. We will take care of you.” She took Claire’s hand into hers and gently squeezed it. Claire looked at her with surprised. She wasn’t used to that kindness, only from her dead maid Marianne.

“Mr Matthews! Mrs Russell needs some privacy!” Miss Grimshaw scolded the old man. She gave some new clothes to Claire she found in an old trunk. “Now, hush!”

Hosea felt obliged to leave the ladies alone.

***

“I am all ears.” Dutch's invitation came accompanied by an intense stare at the cowboy.

“I… her father… she…” Arthur didn't know where to begin, he didn't want to lie to Dutch but at the same time he wanted to protect Claire, he was afraid that if Dutch knew her relation with Cornwall he might use her and put her in some kind of danger. “Some months ago, she ran away from home. Her father paid me well to take her back… That was when I spent some weeks off the camp...” Arthur waited for a reaction in Dutch before continuing but he didn’t do anything. “We saw again at the mayor's party… since then, we met... occasionally…”

“Did you sleep together?” Dutch question hit hard on Arthur. The cowboy bit his bottom lip annoyed.

“I don't see how this information is of use to you.” Arthur tried to hide his discontent.

“You are right. Out of curiosity.” Dutch smiled trying to make him relax. “How she ended up here?”

Arthur took a deep breath. “You see… hhm.. she sent me a note about having information of Cornwall.” At those words, Dutch eyed him intensely. “We met in a local tavern and started to drink… quite a lot… we got drunk.” Dutch nodded understanding the situation. “You know… I'm not a good drunk…” Arthur excused himself. “We got involved in a fight and ended up in prison.” He wasn't proud of it, Dutch could felt his guilt in his voice. “This morning… Theo… her husband came to take her out… He… that bastard beat her… I… I couldn't stay still. I had to do something. She is a good woman, she doesn't deserve that!”

“So you beat him up and took his wife, is that it?”

Arthur slowly nodded, to hear it out loud make him realise how stupid he was.

Dutch looked back through the window to see Claire, he found her a beautiful, refined woman. Still, he didn't understand how that young woman of her status would get interested in Arthur or interested in giving him information about Cornwall or how she have information about him anyway. Somethings didn’t make sense for Dutch, he had some unanswered questions stuck in his mind but maybe wasn't the time to ask them.

“She can stay with us.” Finally said Dutch at Arthur's relief. “Let’s just hope Mr Russell won’t be looking for her here.”

***

Claire finished fixing her clothes with the help of Tilly when Arthur stepped in.

“Now, you look beautiful, Mrs Russell.” Tilly smiled at her gently rubbing Claire’s arm to comfort her.

“Call me Claire.” Claire corrected her with a sad smile. She felt strange using her father’s name again, but to use Cornwall’s name was out of the question. If it was for her she would erase both men from her life.

“Of course, Claire.”

Arthur cleared his throat to alert them of his presence. Both women turned around to see him. Claire’s and Arthur’s eyes locked into each other but neither of them said a word. Arthur stare at her being unable to say a word, he liked the clothes Miss Grimshaw gave to Claire, but he was so worried about her and all the situation he brought on to her.

Claire feeling his intense gaze she blushed and looked down. Noticing the blush in her cheeks Arthur scratched the back of his neck and bit his bottom lip nervously looking somewhere else.

Tilly easily caught the tension between the two of them with a smile on her face. Not that every day you saw Arthur Morgan being nervous around a woman.  

“You have her ready.” Tilly announced to Arthur with a smirk. She turned to Claire to add: “Don’t worry, Claire, you are in good hands.” Tilly left them alone not before gently bumping to Arthur's shoulder to whisper him to take good care of Claire.

“Now what?” Claire asked trying to hide the tremble in her voice.

“You can stay with us.” Arthur explained to her getting close.

“So, I’m part of the gang?” She chuckled nervously.

Arthur let a deep breath escape his lips. “Claire, I can’t lie to you... We are wanted men…”

“I know… I read in the newspapers about Blackwater, Valentine… I know…” She tried to dismiss him, she didn't want to hear any excuse from him.

“No, Claire, listen to me.” Arthur cupped her face to look straight into her eyes. “Having brought you her’ I…. You might...”

“It’s okay, Arthur.” She raised her fingers to cover his mouth to stop words coming out of it. “I understand... I really do. But...” She deeply sighed, Arthur moved his hands to her shoulders. “I prefer to be here, with you, than in that golden cage with… that bastard. So, no matter what awaits me here, I am staying with you.”

“Damn, girl….” He lowered his head hiding his face from her. Claire couldn’t say what was with him but she felt his hands shaking holding her shoulders.

“Arthur? Are you okay?” she asked concerned.

“Yeah… I guess…” he said more to him than to her. “Come, I'll show you around.”

***

After meeting the gang and spending some time with them the night fell Arthur guided Claire inside the manor to his room up on the first floor.

“I know it's not what you're used to…” Arthur removed his hat closing the door behind them.

“It's okay… really…” Claire looked around her, all the manor was falling apart for nobody took care of it in a long time, Arthur’s room wasn’t an exception. She noticed some pictures on a wall. “Can I?” She asked permission to Arthur to take a closer look.

Arthur nodded and Claire got close to those pictures.

“Oh my, is this you?” Claire pointed to a photo she could easily tell it was Arthur, Hosea and Dutch some years ago. “How old you were here?”

“Don’t remember… 18… maybe?” He rubbed his nose embarrassed. “That’s ma father… he wasn’t a good man.”

“And this I guess your mother?” Claire smiled at Arthur who was flustered by talking about himself. Claire then noticed another picture in a frame, it was of a young beautiful woman. “And she? She is beautiful.”

“That’s an old story…” Arthur took down the picture against the table hiding it.

“Oh, an old sweetheart of yours?” Claire teased him feeling his discomfort.

“Don’t wanna talk about it….” Arthur jaw was visibly tensed and his eyes looked sadder than usually.

Claire understood it was a delicate matter. Maybe a sweetheart he wasn’t over yet. That hurt a little. She sadly smiled and sat down on his mattress.

“So, we are going to share, this?” She raised an eyebrow to him.

“I can sleep on the floor, if you want.”

“Seriously, Mr Morgan?” Claire faked offence. “There is enough room for us. If you hold me tight.” She added with a mischievous smile.

Arthur shook his head, she was hopeless.

#Arthur Morgan #Arthur Morgan x OC #Claire Russell #RDR2 OC #RDR2 fanfic #art post #The Fugitive

[jungxk]

just one

filed under: the fuckboi saga. for @suga-kookiemonster who puts up with me gushing about jungkook on the daily and still hasn’t blocked me ily xoxo

notes: the only guy on campus who’s track record trumped that of your best friend’s - park jimin - was jeon jungkook. not that that was a problem...until he set his sights on you. 

warnings: eventual smut, swearing, bad habits (mentions of drinking, smoking etc)

genre: humour, drama, romance, college!au 

wordcount: 5.4k

part i // part ii // part iii // part iv // part v // part vi // part vii // part viii // part ix // part x

"what did i tell you about calling before midday?" you grumble, but jimin is already pushing his way past you before you can finish the sentence. he takes a gulp of your coffee when he thinks you aren't looking, earning a hearty slap on the arm.

"i have a good reason, i promise," he says, hands raised guiltily. his tee is tucked into his jeans at the front, so unreasonably attractive even at this time in the morning. he flashes you a pleasant smile. "i ran out of milk and your place is closer than the store. also, come to my party tonight."

"fridge door, next to the juice. and no."

"come on, hear me out," jimin starts, but you're already padding back to your room. he uses your groggy state to snake an arm around your waist, yanking you back into him effectively. you've never been a morning person and this isn't the first time he's used that to his advantage. usually you'd be at least mildly aware that you don't even have a bra on, but you're so sleepy you can barely acknowledge how the underside of your breast brushes his forearm. you can only hope the same goes for jimin, who's snuggling into you cutely - the classic puppy dog tactic. "it's not even a party, just me and tae and a few others. bring the girls if you want, we'll order some takeout. super chill."

"that's what you always say," you rub your temples. "and the next thing i know jisoo is throwing up on the side of a car and seulgi's in a fist fight."

"i mean it this time," he smiles again, turning you around like a rag doll to face him. "you never come over anymore! it'll be fun."

"what are you talking about? i was literally there yesterday! we had dinner, remember?" the warmth of jimin's hand pushing you onto the sofa would've made you give in on any other day, but all it does now is make your eyes feel extra heavy, ready to go back to bed. it was always like that with jimin, teetering on the end of touches that could be flirty, could be friendly - you could never really tell. it had been so long now you learned not to question it. besides, jimin was a touchy guy. a social butterfly and all that. he'd grope anything with a heartbeat and you were no exception, best friend or not.

"first of all, eating cereal in my bed while i play fallout is not dinner," he says, carding a hand through his ashy hair as if to make sure you don't forget how handsome he is while he's convincing you. "i found a marshmallow chunk in my pillow case by the way, so thanks for that. but what i mean is, you always work so hard. you deserve a little fun and the last time you came to one of my things was, what? two months ago? it's like you don't like parties!"

"i don't like parties!" you say, folding your arms. "you know this, jimin. especially not the sticky, humid kind. i’m an introvert in disguise, remember?"

"what if i clean? like vacuum and everything?"

"do you even own a vacuum?"

"not the point," he presses his lips together so his cheeks puff out. "i miss you."

you hold back a shit eating grin. "you miss me?"

"yeah," he props his elbow on the back of the sofa to face you. "ever since senior year started, i hardly see you letting loose. and i get that it's not the same as before, i just," your eyes soften and he avoids them vehemently. "whatever. maybe i just miss seeing you all dolled up."

he isn't exactly lying. ironically, you found yourself becoming even more isolated nowadays, especially with graduation looming in the not-so-distant future. ever since you switched your science major to arts, your parents made it abundantly clear that there wasn't a chance in hell they'd support you. financially or otherwise. while not joining your family's long line of doctors and engineers had its perks - the main one being you weren't painfully miserable anymore - it also meant you had nothing and no one to fall back on if your career went tits up. and while overworking yourself with projects and internships in preparation wasn't such a loss since it was a subject you were actually passionate about, jimin was right. too much of anything wasn't good for anyone.

"dolled up, huh..." you say, and he perks up immediately at the resolve slipping in your voice.

"yeah. i forgot what you look like with lipstick on," he peers at you hopefully. because occasional bad habits and fickle personality aside, jimin really did care. and him coming all the way here just to make sure you didn't slip back into how you used to be was testament to that. "and not the skin colour ones, i mean like actual colours."

"they're called nudes."

"and not even the good kind," he huffs, shifting closer because he knows you're about to break. "so? what do you say?"

you look up at him one last time before sighing in defeat. "i'm not bringing jisoo," you say, but he still beams happily. "if she catches tae with his tongue down another girl's throat it's gonna be your birthday party all over again, and i don't have the strength for that. and i'm leaving before midnight. i have an early class tomorrow."

"that's fine!" jimin says with a grin that takes up almost his whole face, soft cheeks glowing. he leans in close enough for you to get a whiff of his comforting, intoxicating cologne. "as long as you can make it."

"just a few friends and takeout, right?" you poke his chest warningly. "nothing crazy?"

he nods. "nothing crazy."

x

x

x

"yeah, there's no way in hell i'm going," jisoo says around a mouthful of pasta. you're currently all curled up on your bed like always, even though there's a perfectly good living room, not that you mind. ever since your parents kicked you out, having the girls crowded in your room made you feel cosy. less alone. "i'm either gonna clock taehyung into next week or screw him on the porch. i'd rather avoid both instances."

"do you even remember what he did?" seulgi asks, genuinely curious. "i think i was breaking up a cat fight at the time."

"no, you joined in," you correct, but she ignores you.

jisoo chews her food thoughtfully. "i think it was something to do with another girl? julie? jennifer?" she takes another second to think. "to be honest, no not really. but the point is i remember how he made me feel and that's just as important! if not more! but that doesn't matter," she says, training her eyes back on you. she points her fork. "what we should be worrying about is ____."

"you're right," you sigh, burying your face into your koala plushie. "i haven't shaved my legs in like, centuries. i'm considering telling jimin i'm sick, that's how badly i don't wanna deal with it." you rub your scratchy knee against seulgi to prove a point. "see? i'm like a porcupine! getting even one leg bald by tonight is like, a three person job-"

"not that," jisoo says, waving your leg away when you stretch it to her. "i have wax strips in the bathroom, you're fine. what i'm talking about is jimin. i know i say this before every party, but i'm like, a thousand per cent certain he's gonna make a move on you."

even seulgi laughs at that. "here we go again. what are you gonna bet this time? that skirt you ordered came in the mail by the way."

"i'm calling dibs on her new lipstick," you point to the one on her vanity. "jimin broke my brown one! he put the cap on without rolling it down first. i thought it was an accident but after this morning i think maybe the fucker broke my favourite nude on purpose."

"ugh, typical," seulgi shakes her head in disgust. "men are so dumb. don't tell me it was the limited edition one that i got you?"

"it was!" you wail, covering your eyes at the memory. "i actually cried."

"hello!" jisoo claps her hands between the two of you. "can we focus for a second?"

"deciding which of your stuff to steal next is focusing," seulgi offers.

jisoo narrows her eyes. "stop acting like the pair of you won't take my stuff anyway." she turns back to you, her expression looking far more serious than what the conversation permits. "what are you gonna do when jimin confesses to you tonight, hm? should seulgi let him fuck you in the bathroom or do you wanna be cockblocked until he's sober enough to kiss you with no tongue?"

"how about neither?" you sigh. "babe, when are you gonna give all this up and just believe me? me and jimin are friends."

"i'll believe you when it sounds believable!" she huffs. "come on, coming all the way over here to get you to come to his party because he misses you? asking you to get dolled up for him? this is peak fuckboy crush culture, i don't know why you don't want to accept that!"

"because it's jimin!"

"exactly," jisoo looks at you carefully. "it's jimin...can you honestly say you've never thought about it?"

you don't say anything, because you both know the answer. but in your defence, so did everyone. park jimin was gorgeous and friendly and naturally touchy. he always knew the right thing to say and was charming to a fault without even having to try. everyone and their mother thought about him in a romantic context, even you put your hands up to that. you may have briefly entertained the idea back in the beginnings of your friendship but it was quick to pass. even though he was friends with literally everyone, not many people could say they were close to jimin like you, and that made you so happy. there was nothing else to want.

"well, if you ask me, whether he's in love with her or not is irrelevant," seulgi butts in. "i'm not letting that clown near her tonight or any other night until he buys her a new lipstick."

"wow, you're right," jisoo nods, sinking back into the pillows. "forget what i said. cockblock him until he at least coughs up a gift card."

x

x

x

"just a few friends and takeout, right? nothing crazy?"

"nothing crazy."

"this is crazy," seulgi hisses, hands wringing out your arm defensively when you both pass a couple dry humping on the front porch on the way in. "it's not even that late!" the gush of musky air that hits you both in the face when you walk in is enough to render her speechless after that.

it definitely took some getting used to after a few weeks being cooped up in an art studio or at your desk, but it wasn't something a few drinks couldn't fix. it's only after seulgi wanders off and leaves you to your own devices does taehyung find you in the corridor, with that smile that shows all his teeth, big arms wrapping around your neck so you have no choice but to squish your face into his shoulder.

"____! i thought jimin was lying when he said you'd show up!" he says, manoeuvring you round the corner where the music is a little more muffled. he keeps his hand around you even once he's steadied you, the contact going straight to your head. it didn't help that literally every one of jimin's friends were as beautiful as him. his dark eyes study you carefully, and you know that look. "is jisoo here?"

there it is, you smile to yourself. "not tonight, tae. sorry."

he pouts, fingers tapping patterns on your side. "did you tell her i was sorry? about jennie? it all happened really fast and i..."

"didn't you finger her in the garden?"

"yeah, but she blew me! what else was i supposed to do?"

"tae," you pat his chest soothingly. if it was any other guy you'd be talking in colourful expletives, but taehyung really was a puppy in a boy's body. he had the attention span of a peanut despite meaning well, and you were just a tad too nice to reprimand him for it. at least tonight. "i think you should consider that maybe the jisoo boat has officially sailed. reigning her back in will only do more harm than good, you know?"

"will it though?" he has a twinkle in his eye. which in your experience, is not a good sign.

"that wasn't a challenge, taehyung." you frown.

he winces. you only call him taehyung when you're super serious or super drunk. and since the drink he gave you is still half full it wasn't wise to bank on the latter. you were always sweet, friendly to a fault, but when it came to your girl friends even you had your limits. "okay okay, fine." and before barely a millisecond passes, "so...did you come with seulgi?"

"for the love of god," you mutter, passing him. you definitely needed another drink.

x

x

x

when jimin sees you across the sea of bodies in the living room, he can't hold in his giddiness. you look particularly pretty tonight, with your hair down and a attractive red stained lip colour (of his choice). watching you blossom into such a soft, captivating young woman over the last couple years made him so happy. maybe too happy. jimin had a tendency of breaking things closest to him when he got too invested, and it was a miracle you weren't one of them - yet. he does his best to handle you with care even though you aren't a fragile little thing anymore, his touch radiating that as he snakes an arm around your waist.

"oh!" you squeak, turning back to look up at him with wide eyes as he tugs you into his chest. you're so pretty. "jimin!"

"when did you get here?" he smiles, effectively pulling you away from the group of friends you chatted with. he lowers his mouth to your ear like he's sharing a secret, chest close against yours. you gulp. every little thing he does always feels so intimate, and it was harder to ignore that when you had a bit to drink. "if taehyung hadn't let me know you showed up i might've missed you."

you brace a hand on his shoulder to steady yourself, your feet a little wobbly after that last shot. "wouldn't be the first time. do you even know half the people here?"

he shrugs playfully. "am i supposed to?"

you sigh. "jimin, what did i tell you about lending out your house and booze to people who don't know your last name?"

"hmm," he tips his chin up and pouts his mouth thoughtfully so that his cheek dimples, fingers interlocking behind your waist securely. the action is enough to make onlookers dubious of your ‘friendship’, and you don't blame them. but you quickly push the thought aside in favour of jimin's alluring eyes. "something about how its telling of my generous and lovable character?"

you pinch his chin until he squirms into laughter. "try again, hot shot."

x

x

x

"what was that?" seulgi hisses in your ear on one of your many trips to the bathroom. thankfully since its a house party you aren't crowding into a stall together like you would a club, giving her enough space to sit on the rim of the bathtub while you fix your hair. "like is it me, or is jimin extra touchy with you tonight?"

"not you too," you groan, ruffling the roots. "for the last time, jimin is just being jimin. can we please talk about something else?"

"okay, fine," she says, getting up to fix the back of your hair that you can't see. "while prince charming was sweet talking you downstairs, some guy came up to me asking about you. ever heard of jung hoseok?"

you pout thoughtfully. "red hair? kinda loud? i think so..."

she smacks you playfully. "what do you mean you think so? the guy is so pretty i started feeling insecure about myself! and i'm wearing my lucky underwear!" she says, making you laugh. "anyway, apparently he's in one of your political arts classes and hasn't had the chance to talk to you yet."

you wince in the mirror at her. "i don't like where you're going with this..."

"____, babe. just get his number. there's nothing wrong with just talking a little," seulgi says gently. she knows how close you keep your cards to your chest, and with good reason after all you'd been through. you only had a few close friends and sociable as you seemed, letting people in was difficult for you. but if anyone genuinely wanted more happiness for you, it was seulgi. you never dabbled with guys if she didn't give them the all-clear. "he seems like a nice guy, really. and you know i'd never just say that for the sake of it."

"i know," you smile, dipping in to hug her. "i'll think about it."

x

x

x

jimin, being the center of attention that he is - the walking social hub of any given five mile radius - considers himself pretty good at handling the unexpected, especially at house parties. the unexpected being a broken vase, vomit on the carpet, a fist fight in the kitchen. normal stuff. what he isn't prepared for, however, is jungkook rocking up well past one in the morning, already making eyes at some girls even when he's barely got the other foot in the door.

jeon jungkook doesn't usually turn up to these parties, because...well, he never usually turns up to anything. but everyone knew his name, of course, because jungkook's track record was the only one that trumped jimin's - to the point where it bordered on myth, and with good reason. the guy was built like a steakhouse and still had the handsome, innocent face of a boy that meant well even though he rarely ever meant well.

which in all honesty wasn't a problem. jimin loves jungkook like his own, really. he's known him since he was pre-pubescent and acne prone and lord knows he'd fight a losing battle for that boy because that's what brothers do. regardless, when jungkook all but lets his line of vision land somewhere near your pretty smile from across the garden, jimin smacks him upside the head. "no."

"the fuck," jungkook spits, rubbing his undercut. "i didn't do anything!"

"yet," jimin finishes, stony faced. "i'm just stopping you in your tracks so your bad habits can catch up." he entertains jungkook's sceptical expression before huffing. "____ isn't one of your play things. she's a good person and no offence, but she really doesn't need any of your shit in her life."

"she's your friend, not your girlfriend," jungkook clarifies, and jimin can see the way his eyes fight to peel away even with ten feet and thirty bodies between you. 

maybe it's the alcohol but he can't help the way his gaze keeps naturally drawing back to you; it wasn't out of the ordinary for him to set his sights on a girl for the night, but you were so...different from his normal pickings. so...fresh. you didn't try hard and you didn't need to, kept to yourself and remembered every ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ - jungkook liked that. jungkook really liked that. "how is it i've never run into her before?"

jimin isn't stupid enough to use the words off limits because that's just fanning the flames with this kid. he's older than jungkook but he still resorts to puffing out his cheeks and lying through his teeth like a five year old. "she doesn't like you."

"she doesn't know me," jungkook flashes his glittering smile at him, the devil incarnate.

"everyone knows you, kookie," jimin says into his beer, too quiet to be banter but too loud for jungkook to ignore. he cards a hand through his ashy brown hair, doesn't look jungkook in the eye but may as well with how serious his voice goes. "please. just leave her out of it."

jungkook presses his mouth together, dimples pinching at the sides resolutely as he sways his gaze to some giggling redhead instead, because that's what brothers do.

x

x

x

somehow you always end up in this position - the drunk friend having to help the drunker friend. but the drunker friend isn't usually seulgi; in the intoxicated hierarchy on a night out you always fell snugly between jisoo and seulgi, but not this time. this time, you find yourself on the porch with seulgi's head cradled in your lap after she emptied her stomach out on the lawn, frantically tapping on your phone for an uber just as it dies.

"fuck," you grunt, throwing it back into your purse before rummaging through your roommate's. you visibly cringe at how sticky it feels, covered in god knows what and refusing to switch on. "this can't be happening..."

you're forced to prop seulgi up against the side of the house while you hurry inside to search for jimin. it was well passed late but the crowd was still hot and heavy, your short stature making it difficult for you to peer through the sea of bodies. you almost cry in relief when you finally locate taehyung in the kitchen, his hands instinctively grabbing your elbows to pull you out of the crowd and steady you when you teeter over to him.

"tae," you start, almost dipping straight into his chest if he didn't have a hold on you. "have you seen jimin? i need a ride home, seulgi's done for tonight."

"i'm pretty sure he's busy," he says apologetically, gesturing upstairs. "as in, took some girl up to his room an hour ago kind of busy."

"fuck," you sigh, head lolling back. "seulgi's still outside...”

"here," tae says, pulling you into his hip with one hand and reaching for his phone with the other. the contact is nice, warm. comfortable to the point where you find yourself snuggling your head into his shoulder. tae glances down at you against him with a pleased smirk. "easy there, princess. keep your head up while i call you an uber, okay?"

"i can take them," a sudden voice intervenes, your chin lifting up to peer over tae's chest. the boy beside taehyung offers you a small smile, so disarmingly attractive you lose your words. he's got round eyes that glitter even in the dim kitchen lighting, connecting with yours in a way that makes it impossible to look anywhere else. "i'm parked just outside. only had a few beers and even that was like, hours ago."

"are you sure, jungkook?" taehyung asks, still keeping a protective arm around you.

"'course," he turns his attention back to you, your skin prickling inadvertently under his gaze. he's so tall you have to look up at him a little. "and you said your friend's still outside, right? the quicker she gets home the better."

you nod. "thank you..."

"jungkook," he smiles, teeth glittering as he plucks you smoothly from taehyung's hold and into his. you're so focused on the weight of his hand around your back you forget to say bye to tae, letting jungkook guide you through the packed hallway and back outside. maybe it’s the booze but his jawline is amazing even from this angle. "i'm a friend of jimin's."

"yeah, i know," you giggle finally. "everyone knows you, jeon jungkook. you're just...different than i expected."

"different?" he pries softly, the quick lift of his brow making you giggle again. "different how?"

"just," your teeth sink into your bottom lip when you eye him up and down and jungkook swears he's got head rush just from that. you take him in, broad torso stuffed into a leather jacket that's straining at the seams, hair pushed back to reveal his handsome face. even the tattoos poking through the v of his t-shirt makes you splutter back a laugh, so picture-perfectly badboy. "...cute."

jungkook doubles takes. he wasn’t exactly expecting that adjective. "cute?"

"yeah," you say, but you're already turning your attention to seulgi now that you've reached her, slipping an arm around her to haul her up. you wobble a little since you're quite unsteady yourself, jungkook quickly ducking down to help you. "where's your car?"

"over there," he tilts his head in the direction of a jeep, propping seulgi's limp arm around his neck.

"who's this?" she slurs sleepily into your ear, but she's loud enough for everyone to hear. "he smells nice."

"your guardian angel," he answers. "with a truck."

"hm," seulgi considers carefully, even while you and jungkook bundle her up so she's lying across the backseat. she's already got her head nestled into your purse like a pillow by the time you manage to climb into the front. "ya seem nice. ____, give him a suck on my behalf when we get home."

jungkook discreetly grins to himself while you're busy with strapping in your belt. "he's not taking us home like that, babe."

"why not?" she grumbles, eyes barely open. "you waxed your legs!"

"here," jungkook says, his face suddenly close as he leans in to pull your seat belt over you. if you looked up you know you'd be millimetres apart, forcing you to stare dumbly down at your torso while he buckles you in, giving the stap a final tug so it settles comfortably between your breasts. it's such a quick action you barely register how practiced it is, like he's done it a thousand times. a more pressing matter is at hand anyway: seulgi was right. he does smell good. "there, all set."

your mumbled thanks barely carries over the sound of the engine starting, and thankfully you're not trashed enough to forget your address. jungkook rolls the windows down so the night air sobers you up a little anyway, finally free of that musky feeling of being in a room filled with too many people. "ah, i missed this...jimin hasn't taken me on a night drive in ages."

"you and hyung are close, right?" jungkook asks, arm up on the wheel in that way that makes boys look irresistible. "he talks about you a lot."

"oh yeah? funny, he never mentions you." you muse.

"really? not at all?"

"i think he called you chlamydia on a stick once," you ponder. 

jungkook huffs, and you can't help but laugh at his pouty expression. he finds himself drawn to it, almost entranced by it; even with your messy hair and smudged makeup, your smile is so effortlessly beautiful. he can see why jimin hid you away from him for so long. "i don't blame hyung for wanting to keep you to himself, i guess. girls as beautiful as you don't come by often."

you smile to yourself and it doesn't go unnoticed by him. "very smooth. don't forget to ask for my number when you help me out."

jungkook tongues his cheek, exhilarated by the challenge. "you think i'm flirting with you, noona?"

you keep a calm demeanour but even he sees the way you eye the veins in his big hands while he drives. but watching the rough of his palms skirt smoothly over the leather is near hypnotic. "i think you're trying to flirt with me, jungkook."

"maybe," he admits with a shrug. "so would you give it to me?"

"what?"

"your number."

you regard him properly. "do you want me to?"

"yes," is his bold reply, calling your bluff without hesitation. jungkook's sheer confidence makes you falter for a moment, his attitude so relaxed you can't tell whether he was taking any of this seriously or not. he meets your eyes from across the console with a small smirk that renders you speechless yet again. "not that jimin hyung would approve. but you're a big girl who can decide for herself, right?"

you blink, before shaking your head with a laugh just as he pulls into your road. jungkook waits patiently for an answer while he parks up by the curb, relishing in the way you eye him oh so carefully. you're tip toeing that fine line between drunk enough to speak your mind but not drunk enough to forget in the morning, so there really wasn't a better time to put all his eggs in one basket. you wet your lips at him and he's sure he’s hit bullseye, but then you're grabbing his chin and pinching it like you would with jimin. "you're cute, jungkook. now help me get her inside."

he blinks, his brain taking a second to catch up before he has to manually tell himself to move. getting seulgi out the back of the car wasn't easy but he's just glad she didn't throw up on him. you call a quick thanks over your shoulder before dragging her in and kicking the front door shut behind you, jungkook finding himself back at his steering wheel more riveted than before.

"fuck," he swears to himself, pulling out his phone and getting up taehyung's chat. "i need her number."

x

x

x

you barely plug your phone into charge with both eyes open once you've put seulgi to bed, and even then jimin's contact is the first thing to appear on the lockscreen. even though you’re halfway in bed with a makeup wipe in one hand, you force yourself to reply.

[jimin 3:42am] you get home okay? tae said you needed a ride, sorry

[you 3:45am] np ur friendsh jungkook gave usf a lift

[jimin 3:45am] jungkook? like jeon jungkook?

[you 3:49am] well unless you know anyt othrer jungkooks yh

[jimin 3:49am] is he there right now?

[you 3:51am] wht no he just dropped us off

[jimin 3:52am] thats all???

you frown, like that was any of his business. but you're honestly too exhausted to pick a fight.

[you 3:53am] yh thats all u nosy fuck

[you 3:54am] anywyh im dead now so gn

#jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook au #jungkook scenario #bts x reader #bts scenario #bts au #jungkook college!au #jimin college!au #bts college!au #bts x you #bts fic #jungkook fic #jimin fic

[megaanycolouryoulike9-blog]

Eighth of April 2019

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrz8NuALuj8Hello everybody 

I know no one is reading this so that hello everybody was pretty useless. I am going to be using this tumblr as my diary. Maybe in 200 years after I’m a dead crazy scientist some random person will find it and realise how fucked up I am B)

Today was a bad day, all cuz of me

When I woke up I was in a bad mood. Im always in a bad mood

My boyfriend loves me a lot. I dont know why Im so suspicious of him cheating on me, deep down I know he would never do that to me. His ex girlfriend is really pretty and she likes him. He doesnt have a lot of friends so he was going to hang out with her. I am so happy for him that hes making a friend but a part of me wants to cry cuz Im scared of what will happen. I know that im being a selfish, out of line bitch, but i dont know how to stop it. even worse, he thinks its cuz i dont trust him. I got really sad when he was gone and cried for a few hours. But I felt a bit better and walked my dog and ate lots of food and I was really proud of myself. Then when my boyfriend came back I was being a bitch to him for no reason

Its really weird. Im genuinely happier for him than I am jealous of her. But for some weird reason it doesnt cancel out. I just feel both happy and sad. I know hed stop talking to her if i just asked but i’m not going to cuz im so happy for him. so instead i make myself go through this all

Then I had another breakdown. I love my boyfriend more than anything but he doesnt comfort me anymore. He takes everything that happens to me to heart and blames it on himself but its not his fault at all. 

He says i’ve changed, which scares me because i think it means that he’s less in love with me. He got mad at me today and said Fuck you to me twice which he never does, and that he doesnt care if i love him or not. I dont know if he meant it, i hope he didnt, but i know he probably did

i wish my brain was a switch and I could turn it off. I wish i was a robot on autopilot that predicted every next move purely on logic, like those automatic planes and cars do. 

Sometimes i wish i wasnt here anymore. I dont know who to tell, ive told my therapist but shes just a therapist. I want a friend so bad, im not going to be a burden on my boyfriend so i wont unload my issues on him. 

Its 7:30 and all of this happened at 2 pm so I feel a bit better. I apologised to all my friends for neglecting them. Hopefully they understand what its like to be me

I wish someone could just read my mind to see Im not a liar and I feel all this stuff. Sometimes its like no one beleives me. My boyfriend thinks its all because of him, my mom still doesnt fully believe me but I know its because of her cultural background, to my therapist im just another source of cash. I dont know what to do

I dont want to die cuz Ive been thinking about the stuff Ill miss out on. Like getting married and having a baby and decorating my very own house

Im going to stop talking about sad things because theres more to life than sadness. I figure that you decide what to give attention to, and im going to try stop pitying myself and pretending like im a helpless cause

I’m just as worthy of love as everyone else, even if im a bit selfish and dumb. I need to work on my insecurities and recognise that my boyfriend loves me and wouldn’t play with my trust. I need to realise that my friends aren’t out purely to get me, and that not all people are my enemies

On a good note, I’ve been listening to the division bell a lot. Heres my favourite song from it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrz8NuALuj8

Ive decided that I really like pink floyd. I wish i didnt have feelings or anything or anyone to please and i could just lay back on the beach all night and listen to this song over and over. That sounds very cheesy ik.

I dont know what else to write. Im a bit hungry but dinner isnt ready yet. Im supposed to make a salad but I’m lazy and dont want to. I miss my boyfriend but hes asleep because hes in a different time zone to me. I dont know if ill ever show him this tumblr because I dont want him to know how sad I am. Im scared he’ll think its his fault again

Ive talked about my boyfriend a lot but i havent told you about my family at all. My mom is from Japan, shes very traditional and conservative. I know she loves me, even though she demonstrates it in questionable ways. My dad is the best dad in the entire world and he loves me a lot. i know he loves me because he cares about me and sacrifices so much for me, like my mom.

I love my little brother so much. He’s so sweet. He’s never said a bad thing about anyone, and I doubt he ever will. He’s a bit dumb, but maybe thats cuz hes still a baby. Im very protective of him cuz hes the only one younger than me, and hes like a STAR!!!! All he ever does is make everyone around him happy

My older brother is a bit of a nut. He’s really smart though and he loves me too. Hes protective of me but i think thats every big brothers job. My oldest brother is strong and tall and hes protective of me too. I dont get to see him as much cuz he started college but he always buys me frozen yogurt so its cool.

I think thats all im going to say for today. im tired and I have work to do. Bye tumblr, i love you!!! Thanks for listening:D

[briteboy]

okay i’m gonna be real with you. i have...a LOT...of messages. going as far back as like...january? probably? i know...i’m so bad...don’t crucify me. i tried to get through all of them but there were a lot that i didn’t have a worthwhile reply for so i’m sorry if i didn’t answer something you sent :{

so here we have: a lot of nice things, a lot of santisms, reactions to the lou and cillian punchout, a few responses to my portfolio and other stuffs...i wanted to put astrology asks in at the end but it’s...a lot more than i thought it was and it’s 3 am so i’d rather die than answer all of those LMAO sorry. i’ll get to it next time

Anonymous said:

u can delete the snorting cum asks but it will still follow you for eternity

okay so I saw the ask about snorting cum and it reminded me of a time that cum came out of my nose. It was gross but my boyfriend and I laughed it off. idk. I thought it would be a funny thing to share!! i'd understand if you didn't want this on your blog!! (maybe it makes you laugh!!)

wELL. WE’RE OFF TO A GOOD START HERE. i’m screaming at this...i hope nothing EVER comes out of my nose ever in life...i hate this but ur right it did make me laugh

(Winry anon again) Also, did you get her name from FMA Winry Rockbell because if so I love it

hehe...yes...

hornybodies

this is what bartsim calls me and i hate her for it

whats the truth bitch

I DON’T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT THIS IS ABOUT BUT I’M LAUGHIGN

i never realised how much i actually missed santi but now im CRYING AND I WANT HIM BACK IN EVERY SINGLE POST WITH LOU BY HIS SIDE LIVING HAPPILY EVER AFTER PLEASE

I missed santirat's beautiful face there are literal tears rn

me too...i hate that i miss him so much it’s so freaking dumb...i haven’t cried to my own story in a while but i bet i’m gonna once santi’s comeback rolls around. i’m already bracing myself

nvm u can have the lovely rat back, that way my heart wouldn’t be hurting like it is now

honestly yeah that’s fair

Been silently following your blog and though I'm more of a "ghost"(? What does that even mean¿) follower, I can't help but express just how chocked I am to see Santi again OMG. Gutted Lou has had a flashback, she does not deserve this. :'(

hello casper the friendly ghost...i love having santi pop up with surprise flashbacks hehe...ur right though she DOES NOT NEED THIS in her life, but it will get better for her soon do not fret my ghoulish friend

I need more pics of Lou and Santi together I’m not satisfied, thankssss

ELI AND MIYU GETTING SO EXCIted WHEN LOU TOLD THEM SHE LIKES GIRLS MY HEART :’)

HEHEH i love it cause that’s literally how my friends and i act, it was fun to write in a scene :~} i’m glad you liked it :’}}

Yeah when I cut my hair short everyone assumed I liked girls I found it kind of odd, but I didn't care too much. It mostly just made me end up realizing all the shit lgbt people go through, one time a guy literally went up to me and my friend, my bff who no one really knew was a lesbian was terrified because he said "oh dont worry lesbians are hot, but gay guys are just disgusting" it ended up he was talking to me, i just rolled up a piece of paper as tight as I could and smacked him on the head

EWW first of all that guy can take his weird fetishization and homophobia elsewhere thanks...i’m glad you threw a paper ball at him LMAO. but yeah on one hand, coming from ignorant/straight people it’s like “uhhhh why would you assume that about me”, within the lgbt community it’s like...common ground...an inside joke...i guess? so it’s weird. the link between hair, clothes and sexuality is can definitely be harmful in certain circumstances

fiona is my spirit animal and i love her ok thanks for coming to my TED Talk

that was illuminating thank you

i re-read santis story and i s2g i've read it so many times idk, but like its so easy to read i dont mean like emotionally but it flows really well. and like its not too confusing i hate when people make overly convoluted stories in an excuse for being deep its some good shit good job my dude

AKJSDKGKSJD THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i never expected anyone to read it oNCE let alone REPEATEDLY...that really makes me so happy though because it’s definitely something you have to go back and read to catch all the details. ahhhhh thank you so much, i never ever want my story to be too complicated so i’m glad you don’t think it is!!

im crying because your recent post reminds me so much of my relationship with my mom when i was younger... she was always out of a job and sometimes we had to resort to living with other family members, it was all really hard on her and especially with having a kid she had to take care of at the same time. even though these are fictional characters, it’s comforting to know that other people have gone through the same situations i have. i love fiona and lou so much, they’re my heart and soul <3

OMG ;_________; i’m crying i’m so glad it resonates with you...i had a lot of friends growing up who were in similar situations and i think i kinda based lou and fi’s relationship on that, so you’re definitely not alone <33 i’m so glad you love them i love u

basically what I’ve learned from these asks is that Gianni is a perfect god-like human and I want one

he is. one time an anon told me they were like santi but they wanted to be rooney and i was like “i’m both santi and rooney on different days and i want to be gianni.” now u know why

hi, i just wanted to pop in and say that i really, really love your blog and i admire your editing skills SO much, i think you are EXTREMELY talented and i don't think you get told that enough. i've been following you for awhile now and i am in love with ALL of your stories, characters and edits you've put out! you're really an inspiration to me and i hope someday my edits can turn out as good as yours!! i don't have reshade so it's harder for me, but i'm trying to learn!! ok have a good day :-)

OMFG ;-; I DO GET TOLD IT A LOT AND IT STILL SEEMS FAKE...you don’t have to go out of your way to compliment me ;___; but thank you so so so much i’m crying...it makes me so giddy that i might inspire someone like WHAT...i don’t even know what i’m doing half the time i edit so u will definitely be able to catch up to me one day even if you don’t have reshade, i know it. i edited without reshade for like 2 and a half years on this blog so you can do it i promise!! have a good day/night/life i love u

fuck my succ

I'm in need of some giannti in my life

we all need some gianti in our lives

Hey! I just wanted to say that ur an amazing writer. You portray everything so well, it’s insane. I want to be a writer someday and I hope my writing is at least somewhat close to yours. Have an awesome day my dude💕

WOW I’M CRYING...i still have a lot of room to grow and so do you, i hope you are able to become the writer you want to be :’} and thank you so much for the wonderful compliment i’m emo have a great day as well

aver is my queen, confirmed.

avey is everyone’s queen confirmed

oksy but listen, look up the model Charlotte Ray Spencer

i did but i couldn’t find her?? all that came up was ray spencer obituaries in charlotte, SC LMFAO...charlotte spencer is an actress tho it seems, is that...who...? omfg

MAY I JUST OFFER THIS NEW SONG OF THE NEIGHBOURHOOD CALLED VOID BC I HAVE A FEELING SANTI WOULD LOVE IT (it's also meant for my aggressive sadboi oc)

OH I LOVE THIS IT FITS PERFECTLY WITH THE PLAYLIST I’M MAKING FOR THE NEW ERA OF SANTI...THANK YOU I’M TOTALLY ADDING IT

I had a ectopic pregnancy when I was seventeen but I feel like I got off lightly compared to Molly. Your story is so beautiful in so many ways, I think it’s incredible how much character development you’ve managed to pull off honestly I’m amazed. Thank you ❤️

omg ;_______; i don’t even know what to say to this, but it means so much to me i can’t even put it into words. thank you thank you thank you so much, and i’m so sorry you had to go through that as well. molly was an extreme case and i hope no one has to go through what she went through. i’m glad you’re okay now, and thank you so much for reaching out to me and reading my story at all ;-; <3333

just a heads up: the links button on your ccfinds blog goes to the femmefinds url still

oh yeah i know i’m gonna be real with you...i’m too lazy to fix it lmAO

Luv your stick n poke tats u posted!!! Could u do more? Maybe on diff places on the bod?? Ur so talented. Xx

omg that was FOREVER ago...maaaaaybe in the future...we shall see...but thank you <33

Can u do a family portrait for all ur characters like u did w Lou!!!

oooooh hehe i probably will in the future!!

Kill v maim is one of my favorite songs of all time omg it makes me wanna wear ripped jeans and a leather jacket and cover myself in glitter and smash some windows with a baseball bat MMMMMM

HELL yeah me too...i become a cyber punk alien vampire when i hear that song

maybe do a casting call posted here ? u have many followers and im sure a good chunk live in ur area and would be willing to model ^_^

omg SCARY...i probably could tho tbh that’s a good idea, thank you!

hi sunny, what program do you use to merge your cc and what do you use to detect and remove broken cc that just doesn't work in game anymore? thanks!

i actually haven’t merged on my new laptop yet but i used s4s for merging and there’s the mod conflict detector!!

My game hasn't been working since the first Cats and Dogs patch but I uninstalled and reinstalled and it finally works again 😭

sunny!! would you recommend your computer to play ts4 on? has it good graphics, can handle the highest settings and so? i really need a new computer but i have no idea which one to go for

yes i would recommend it!! i have reshade, ultra settings and like 8 gb of cc.

thanks for answering my ask eee ur story is probably the best ive read on here and yeah. i love how everything connects and everyones just so real. you dont have to post this i just wanted to thank you for being my inspiration and making me smile, laugh, cry, and scream in the middle of the night with your characters.

I LOVE U...it still sounds so fake to me when people say i inspire them, i don’t even know how to respond to all this ;-; just thank you for sparing a glance my way and resonating with my creations. <3 we scream and cry 2gether

I listened to Separator by Radiohead on repeat whilst reading Santi’s story and now that song just reminds me of him and Lou. I’d totally suggest listening to it’s so good! As is your story :3 xxx

oh radiohead that’s good sh*t...i’m listening to it now and i feel the santou vibes...especially when santi’s feeling out of his mind and she’s the only one who can calm him...haha cool..anyways THANK YOU!!!!

how do you make poses for the roof? i'm not sure how i can know if the sims will clip into the roof or float

honestly i just...eyeball it...because all roofs are different and you can’t put them into blender so. i just winged it lmao...i just made a pose that looked like it could’ve been lou climbing out the window, only the rig was still ground level, and then i used alt + 9 to lift the teleporter onto the roof as best as i could. that’s why it probably wouldn’t be a very practical pose to release, because i have no way of making it easy to use 

Lou punched him and I knew it would happen. 😀👌 nice, nice I like Lou whopping ass.

hehe i’m glad you enjoyed it...who knew she had a freaking hook like that

ok a theory... santi went to look for molly's mother and yea

omg tell me cillian sings every other freckle at some point

OMFG well...that song came out in 2013 and the current flashback year is 2008 so. i would personally murder cillian myself if he was still in lou’s life 5 years after this honestly

hey kitty girl! i was wondering if you could answer this teensy lil question i got. im writing a "story" anddd i was trying to figure out how to make some parts not cliche. like i hate reading about whatever and being like girll ive done seen this before so i just needs to know. kisses

i absolutely love how this is worded and the fact that u called me kitty, very cute. anyway...this is pretty broad, perhaps you could clarify what kinda cliches you want to steer clear from? a lot of the time when i know something is gonna be cliche and there’s no avoiding it, i just kinda own up to it and try to subtly point out how cliche it is and somehow that makes it work out better...like being self aware somehow adds another more realistic element to the story that makes it better? idk...anyway dm me if you need help!!

so.... lou can remember more of what happened? this is good! go 2 the police bitch! tell them!!!!!!!

she should!! but the only problem is she doesn’t have proof. so... 🤔

how do you write your stories in a way that everything is organized and you're certain and not confused with everything? i mean, do you have any way for writing that let you develop your stories with not so much difficults? i'm trying to write an story for months but i only have a few of the most important events on my mind, i don't know how to develop another important details, i always feel that everything is confuse or crap

hmmmmm well my mind is very ah convoluted so it’s a wonder any of this comes out even somewhat cohesive? but basically i have a very good memory and utilize google docs a lot hahaha. i’ve gone in depth about my writing process here!

whats a good way when it comes to starting a sims story? i mean like the first post? :/

ummmmmm maybe test the waters a bit and just make a post introducing your character(s) first? or dive right in and get sh*t started. it could go either way tbh

boyish by japanese breakfast is a santixlou bop

oh sh*t!!!!!! i love japanese breakfast!! and i love this thank you!

So is lou like into cillian in a way? Making him kinda be in her type

as of right now (in the flashbacks)? HELL fucking no. but you’re right, she did say those things in the future to santi. so 🤔

Everyone guessing shit stupidly annoys me haha. I'M UNOBSERVANT AND I DON'T WANNA GO BACK AND CHECK SHIT, LET ME LIVE. *Like* if you a ~dum~ reader who doesn't want every bit of foreshadowing called out. lol

i respect this honestly whenever i drop the hottest foreshadowing of 2018 i never expect my inbox to flood like it does but here we are and i am amazed

CILLIAN NEEDS TO FUCKING FIGHT ME (TYPING THIS ON MY COMPUTER BC I SAW HIS DINOSAUR ASS AND CHUCKED MY PHONE OUT THE WINDOW)

i’m screaming...i’m so sorry it’s my fault about your phone but like also i’m poor i can’t pay for that

i'm studying your latest posts because they're beautiful and my hatred for that long necked bitch is intensifying -- what makes me burn even more is that he's still wearing her necklace, can we say let the bitch burn?

burn babey burn

Why don't you use quick tags?

i’m dumb is why

CILLIAN IS SUCH A SHITASS I HATE HIS FACE WHY R U DOING THIS TO ME

BRUHHHHH THE DINOSAUR LOOKIN ASS BOY IS B A C K run

WAIT THE NECKLACE. HE STOLE THE MCFUCKING NECKLACE BROOOOO

What if Fi's blue eyes are from... Cillian..?

wHY did you have to make him cute and fucking cool though? I still hate him but it's harder.

NVM I JUST LOOKED AT THE POST AGAIN HES WEARING HER NECKLACE INHOPE SHE CHOKES HIMS WOTH IT THIS TIME

I SCREAMED AT THIS SERIES OF QUESTIONS OISDFNGJKDSKJN yeah sorry he’s conventionally attractive but unsettlingly so and i feel uneasy when i look at him and plus the fact that he’s literally evil so .

im like, to 90% sure that cillian is in ace joker. so that song might have reminded lou of him...

this was sent right after that scene of lou hearing the song at pippin’s, so

My conspiracy theory is that cillian is Lou's father. Speakimg of which are we gonna get to that soon, I'm dying of curiosity;.;

I’M LAUGHING I THINK U MEANT FIONA’S FATHER AKSJDKJGDSJ but yeah well. You’ll See

what do u resize ur photos to?

whatever 33% of 1920x1080 is i forget. i have a resizing + sharpening action so i just run that

im about to kill those kids if they keep fucking with my baby

THESE BITCHES BULLYING MY BABY LOU? CATCH THESE HANDS

me @ these ugly kids:

Who are the best creators for mens clothing? I struggle so much to find good cc creators with men specifically!

badabing badaboom

I’m not sure if you’ve converted things before but do you know any good sims 3 cc to sims 4 tutorials? Or your followers?

errrrrr i have no idea i’m sorry :x

would you consider making like a photoshop psd file with all the layers in your editing process?

omg...heck no it would be so unhelpful OMFG mostly because my editing is just my own action + shading and highlighting unique to that pic

would you ever do an editing timlapse of your gameplay pics? 💖💖

ahhhhh maybe!! probably in the future!

OMG HEATHERS WAS FILMED AT MY HIGH SCHOOL AND IM JUST HYPED UP SEEING IT BEING MENTIONED ON THIS ACCOUNT!!

OMFG THAT’S RAD...i’ve literally only seen it once tho i’m fake

I'M SHOOK. my friend kinda asked me out and I wanna say yes but my parents won't let me date. I'm 18! I need your advice! -signed 18 and alone anon

um UR 18 BUDDY UR AN ADULT...DATE WHOEVER THE F*CK U WANT HONESTLY

Can you pretty please link some photoshop tutorials you recommend? I really want to make my photos more cinematic and like your's without totally copying you or someone else. All I do right now is sharpen, color balance, and add some noise and then resize. I really need some more ways to get better looking photos such as yours.

ahhhhh the problem is i don’t know of any i’m sorry...lmao this is totally unhelpful :\ i have my own editing tutorial which is outdated but can probably help you out with the basics of lighting effects and shading n stuff?

Heyyy, I saw that you answered a question about making a ps action like your reshade, and I just wanted to say that I would love that! Unfortunately Mac users like me, can’t use reshade unless boot camping Windows onto our computers...☹️ and your reshade is just soooo pretty...

i don’t know if i’ll be able to replicate the reshade effect totally but i could release the action i’ve made for myself? it warms up screenshots but is totally adjustable to your liking for different color tones so in that way it’s kinda similar to the reshade. i’ll seeeeee what i can do...i know the woes of mac users all too well, my friend

i just wanna give lou a big ol cozy hug :o((( pls

pls hug her she needs it.

Do you post on tumblr from your phome or from your computer? Just curious.

mostly from my computer, sometimes i answer messages on my phone while i’m out and you can tell because autocorrect actually makes me use proper capitalization for once in my life

how many hours have you played the sims? for me i have 4,070 hours. haha help

OMFG i think mine is like...900 or something...i can’t tell if that’s too much or too little, but it’s definitely inaccurate

if i could only look at one person's tumblr from now on it would be yours. ur literally the queen of tumblr #shookaf and also i really hope i die before you ever say ur leaving tumblr cause when u do, i will legit die and bury my own grave. i really appreciate u and hope one day i can be on ur level but rn im at level 1.5 while ur up in the millions :D

I’M SCREAMING PLEASE I AM A PLEB.............i cry u flatter me too much ;-; i genuinely hope i never leave this place because it’s been so fun and it’s helped me evolve so much as an artist and a writer, plus i made some of my greatest friends on here. so i hope that day never comes!! but who knows life is wild. anyway i’m sure you’re actually like at level 578 and are just being modest. it’s okay you don’t have to be humble

i think its so cool that you and wanderlust and other simmers use multiple worlds to make your own town and stuff. idk why but thats just so cool to me and i would have never thought of it. love your blog and story <3

omg!!! well i couldn’t resist, i love a bunch of them and can’t limit myself to just one ya know. plus the more i thought about it, the more my gen 2 story kinda centers around these kids from this one town and the town itself is very relevant. so i felt like i had to make my own!! and i’m very excited to get started with that hehe

I just met a guy named Rodrigo Santiago and I sCREAMED HOLY SHIT

Update (tho idk of you got the first one): I just got a text from a classmate named Rodrigo Santiago. I'm sCREECHING

no freaking way. there’s no way i don’t believe...i want proof...

YOU SO FUCKIN PRECIOUS WHEN U SMILE

dont worry about posting this or do idc but i just wanted to say you should write about whatever you want and not care about whether people think you condone it or not. if i (a gay male) were to write about lesbians its not like im saying YOU HAVE TO BE LESBIANS BLAH BLAH BLAH you know what i mean? or if im writing about a robbery doesnt mean im like condoning robbery so like idk you do you boo and keep it coming ;D ilysm btw

OMFG no yeah i get it, i mean i think now especially in this online environment, people are hyper aware of Problematique things and so they’re a little too quick to point fingers without looking deeper than the surface. and whatever it’s fine people are always gonna be like that because people are mostly inherently judgmental, especially when it comes to consuming media. artists/writers face stuff like this all the time because people refuse to look past the surface, hence why works have gotten misconstrued all the time. but yeah i really appreciate this sentiment, thank u i love u

hope this isnt a weird question but what is the image size that u used for your character page?? thnk u 💕

omg it’s 300x300

have u listened to visions of gideon by sufjan stevens i was listening to it while reading ur stories and it made me so :(

oh my boy sufjan aka gianni’s personality claim i love him...and this song is :{ but i love even if it’s from the nasty age gap peach fucking movie

If i was married to Jamie and he treatin’ our daughter like that… oh I swear HES GOT TO GO!

it’s 2 am i’m so tired answering all of these i forgot who jaime was for a sec i was like um why are we talking about GoT anyways good night

how does alpha hair work with reshade? it seems so good in your screenshots and i’ve seen that in others screenshots it looks bad? whats the secret?

well good morning haha jk i never went to sleep anyway here u go

hooow do you make adorable toddlers in ts4?? teach me, gimme some advice please :(((

chubby cheeks! big eyes! small faces! little but plump lips! a good skin! dats all

how did u get ur sim onto the fire escapes?

ze teleporter mod, that’s it

I snickered at the, THE RETURN OF SANTI. Like I imagine it written in red horror lettering and santi just busts down the door and says ho ho ho im back bench, Did U miss me?

honestly i own a calendar and if i knew a definite date u already fucking kNOW it would be up there

ahhh im sorry for asking but im wondering how you find voice claims?? i'm looking for some for my sims, but it's tough to find one that's *right*, you know?? and your voice claims are great!! thank you <3

OMG voice claims are HARD, i literally just like “collect” them over time...i have a list in my phone of voices i like/may use in the future lmao, but try to think of actors or musicians and search interviews/movie or tv scenes with them speaking!!

i don't even read your story but i still follow you because i love your personality, sim style and just your whole entire tumblr

u follow me for ME? UM...what are u doing here...i’m so sorry (i love u...)

do you have a different reshade preset for flashback screenshots and for the present ones?

i do not!! i just edit differently

what happened to the honeycomb?

OMFG it’s still there...but we legit haven’t seen it since girooni’s wedding so um...it’s gonna have to get a makeover. i’m gonna do it when girooni come back home so i can finally show rupi working there like...wow...she deserves to be seen

lou's dad is the biggest asshole and i am waiting for the day that bitch dies

us when he dies

shit theory: caroline goes to find and confront cillian about what he did in teen lou timeline. care ends up forming a crush on cillian and goes back to meet him several more times, but cillian ends up liking lou more which makes caroline jealous. and that's why they don't speak currently, 'cause cillian ruined lou's life in more ways than one.

uM holy fuck that’s all i got to say

pls tell me that Caro killed the dude that choked Lou (or beat his ass)

god i hope so !

how many people do you follow? are you “strict” with who you follow?

i follow 264 people and yeah i’ve gotten a bit stricter with it just cause like...i only want to follow people whose content i truly care about/will actually notice on my dash

would you ever do a sim dump?

probably in the future, it seems like people want more male and female sims from me SO

ramona got some moves tf

the girl is out here bobbing to the chicken dance like nobody’s business

have u seen the end of the fucking world? if u did what are your #thots

UM......................i watched the first episode ‘cause i heard so much about it and um.............................it was so bad OMFG i hated it. way too edgy for me. completely missed the mark. not into it at all. hard pass

CAN LOU PLEASE HAVE A MAN IN HER LIFE WHO IS NOT A COMPLETE TWAT PLEASE

HOPEFULLY ezra will follow through with that and i don’t necessarily mean in a romantic way but like...as her new roommate MAYBE he will be a blessing we can HOPE

I'm not sure if you've been asked this or not, but your poses are so good and I was wondering if you have ever considered making a pose pack? Sorry if this came off as rude! I love your posts!

i will probably in the future!! but first i gotta figure out which ones i’d actually include

okay so this is random but I just wanted to say that I absolutely love your sims stories. Everything is so perfect and I'm forever shook because I can't believe the "sets" you use are actually the game. Your sims are so fleshed out and you are a huge inspiration to me. Anyways sorry if this was weird but I'm like obsessed with ur blog. bYe

AJHSDHJFSD THANK YOU!!!!!!! yes somehow we work miracles into this game can u believe it...ahh but thank you so much, it means everything that i would inspire you in any way...like what...omg

Santi is actually standing outside present Lou’s apartment wondering where the fuck he went wrong

he’s been there for 6 months just on the street standing there please someone let him in .

LOUUUU OH MY GODDD SKKDSNSJDH MY BABY. SO THATS HOW SHE GOT THE SCAR. WOW

there it is fellas. this message is sooooo old i’m so bad

Have you read/heard of The Lunar Chronicles

i have not!! but i’ll jot it down!

I was wondering if you’ve ever had any problems with skins? For me some on the palm side of the hand it’s noticeably darker than what the skin is supposed to be.. like the rest comes out find but the hands are darker.

hmm...that’s weird, i haven’t seen that. i think it probably depends on the skin? or maybe your sim detail settings?

santi my daddy, honeybodies my mommy, lou looking like a cutie when she saw dat tiny puppy. my name is rappin anon, and i just wanted to say, ur are my favorite simblr basically saving my day. rappin anon OUT

o...my god

i love u

i love u...

#nonsims #saviorhide #sunny answers #where is the anon that loves these...i always think of you when i make these...enjoy

[feycreature]

even numbers for Iarralei and/or uneven numbers for Ghost?

under the readmore:

for iarralei:

Do they have a fear of an animal? If so, what animal?

shes probably not fond of stags

Do they like cuddling?

yes!

What do they look like?

ive posted a picture of her im not gonna describe her

What are their good and bad traits?

uhhh shes kind and patient but very stubborn and hard to befriend

What is their favourite room to be in, in the house they live in?

Shes Homeless

Can they do magic?

yes

What is a pet peeve of theirs?

being asked to do things more than once

What is their sexuality?

bi

Have they ever been in a romantic relationship?

yeah

Do they have a pet?

iarralei cant even take care of herself

Are they a supernatural being?

yes

Can they play an instrument? If so, what instrument and what can they play?

nope

Have they ever been in a physical fight before? If so, with who? Who won?

multiple times, considering that shes still alive its safe to say shes winning

If they could have one wish, what would they wish for?

her brother back :(

Do they have a job?

not anymore!

Do they get stressed out easily?

no

Have they ever broken the law?

absolutely but im not sure specifically how

Have they ever rode a horse before?

probably not?

Do they get along with others easily?

nnnot really

If I wanted to draw them, what would be distinct physical features that I would have to know to draw them correctly?

hollow cheeks, dark circles that make it look like shes been punched in the face, fuckin filthy, tired sort of droopy eyes, pale grey skin

Do they live with anyone? If so, who?

nope!

Do they know more than one language?

she speaks i think common elvish and.. something else i cant remember off the top of my head

Have they ever won a contest before? If so, what for? What did they win?

shes 230 im sure she won A contest at some point

What does their room look like?

Shes Homeless

If they got called out by someone, what would they do?

walk away wordlessly

Have they ever been axe throwing?

maybe?

Do they know how to fish?

probably not

Do they own their own baby pictures?

no

Do they like to show off?

no

What would be their dream vehicle?

a very classy horse

Who, in their opinion, makes the best food?

probably her brother,

Did they ever change their appearance?

oof yeah

Do they like glowsticks?

yes!

Are they a day or night person?

night!

What do you, the creator of this OC, like most about them?

shes a person intrinsically tied to death and depression who has devoted her life to making sure people dont die before their time and dont suffer

Do they currently have a significant other? If not, are they going to get one later one?

uhhh she has a fuckbuddy

Who is one person that can always make them laugh?

Her Dead Fucking Brother

Who would be their cuddle buddy?

i. i wanna say avi. someone needs 2 cuddle the boy. but also ruby

If they had a nightmare, who would they run to?

TAKE A GUESS. TAKE A WILD GUESS.

Do they like other people’s children?

no

Does anyone make them have butterflies in their stomach?

not really

What is their neutral expression?

the same as her every other expression

What is something they can’t leave home without?

all of her belongings shes Homeless

Do they liked to be tickled?

no

What is a joke that they would find funny?

the entire invisible duck bullshit

What was their childhood like?

pretty nice! shes always been Depression but she spent a long time living with her brother and crashing with friends after parties, she had a good time

Do they take criticism well?

no

Who do they like to make jokes with?

she doesnt

and for ghost:

What is their favourite food?

im gonna say burgers

What do they wear to bed?

at some point probably boxers or nothing sdfgh but now just his clothes

Do they have a secret handshake with anyone?

nah

Do they like chocolate?

not particularly

Do they have any artistic talent?

yes! he draws good!

Do they believe in luck?

yeah

Do they believe in dragons?

he fuckin better

What was the last thing they cried about?

im mr loverman, and i miss my lover man

Do they have a best friend? If so, who, and what makes them their best friend?

not sure how to answer this!

What does their relationship with their family look like? Are they close? Distant? Ect.

pretty distant

Do they have a familiar?

no

How do they usually wear their hair?

Fluffey

What type a high schooler are/were they?

friendly slightly rowdy partyboy

What is their favourite holiday?

christmas probably

Do they wants kids? If they already have kids, do they want more?

he wants so many kids so bad im gonna cry

Do they know how to drive?

cars dont exist

Did they ever dye their hair before? If so, to what colour? Did they like it?

nope

Do they own a plant?

no

What is their favorite gif?

gifs dont exist

Do they have any tattoos?

nope

What is their favourite breed of dog?

silken windhounds

Where is their dream vacation?

home

Are they a quick learner?

id like to think so

If the world were to end in 24 hours, where would they be and who would they be with?

he would be in bed with a person i cant name

If they could have an extinct animal for a pet, what would they have?

i dont know enough extinct animals for this :(

Have they ever shot a gun before?

yes, ingame

What is something that they want but can’t have?

im mr loverman, and i miss my lover man

What is something they always wanted to do but too scared?

I CANT ANSWER THIS HERE BUT IF U KNOW. OOF.

What makes them standout among others?

hes a fuckin. tiefling cowboy warlock with a cool sword and scale mail and a phd

What is their favourite song?

mr loverman by ricky montgomery

What is their favourite book?

hes vain as hell probably one of his own fdhgjkhsd

Are they approachable?

yes!

What makes them smile?

most things

What is something that is simple, but always makes them smile?

remembering the good hes doing

Are they allergic to anything?

i dont think so

Who is their ride or die?

i cant name them here!

What attracts them to another person?

being pretty and past that, being kind and vulnerable and loving. he agrees to confidence being sexy but vulnerability is the Most attractive

Have they ever partied too hard and their friends had to take them home?

yeah

Who would cheer them up after a long day?

oh wow the same person i cant name

What object to the care for the most?

the small box in his pocket

How would they react if someone broke into their home?

probably with punching

What is something that they are good at?

being a charming sweet old southern man

Do they like to cook?

he could burn cereal

Who is someone that they rely on?

the same fuckin person i cant name

Have they ever been a sword fight before?

yes?

Do they have a place that can go and turn off their brain?

not physically

What are they like as an adult?

charming old southern dude!

Have they ever jumped out of a plane?

planes dont exist

Have you ever drawn them before? If you are comfortable with it, would you post a picture?

already have

#prince-kraehe #god. so much

[itoshit]

Opening the door, I was met with Vee, laying on the bed. None of us talked, and as I noticed tears running down her face, I couldn't prevent the tight smile from showing up.

Hey Venus

I knew what I was doing. I knew Vee would be mad, but I also knew that I hadn't have any choice.

Your hair... you did it for me?

Yes I did

No I didn't. I just thought that I would be able to attract more chicks that way

You're funny Manji'

She cracked a smile at my reply, but I didn't reflect her expression.

Manjiro will do yeah? Look Venus.

Approaching her and sitting by her side, I turned to her, resuming my talk.

It was dumb of me. Everything really. I think... how could I put it. You're a nice girl, but I don't think you're a good match for me. I need my woman to be more courageous and less of a crybaby you know? So yeah, it was fun while it lasted, but I kinda grew tired of you. Not to be mean though, it happens every day. I don't want to waist more time on you, so as soon as you're healed, you can start your life again alright? Koko could help you with money, we'll buy you a new apartment.

Vee didn't seem to listen anymore, her eyes were on me, but she didn't look as if she was believing me.

You're lying

Guess I will have to be more convincing them. Passing a hand through my hair, I grinned at her.

Look Venus, the sex was good, but you're getting too attached. You even said to Kakucho that you liked me! Really? Baby I was keeping you around because I pitied you. To be honest, I wanna fuck other girls now.

I needed to hurt her. To make her let go of me.

Senju wanted to see me tonight so... yeah.

Vee started being more aggressive with me, explaining it by the request that I had for her to be mine and me to be hers. I knew all that, and of course I wanted us to be together. But it wouldn't work. Not with an angel like her.

Look Venus, don't be a bore yeah? Don't act like we were together or anything. I don't like you, I stayed because your pussy was good. End of the story! I need to get ready for my little date, so I'm gonna go now. So huh... have some rest yeah?

Patting her uninjured leg, I didn't wait for her to answer and I winked at her, exiting the room.

As the door was closing, I closed my eyes, breathing deeply.

I was used to all that, but this time, I would make sure that the person I held close to my heart would stay alive, regardless of my feelings.

Sacrificing my happiness didn't look that bad if that meant for Vee to stay alive. Would I be able to see her with someone else? No. Did I even have a say in the matter? No.

-Mikey

I- I feel so bad rn??😭😭

And I hope you ate after !

OHHH OKAY MICHAEL!

I don’t like you. I pitied you. I don’t want to waste anymore time on you.

I knew he was lying. I knew every word he said to me was nothing more than fabricated bullshit he probably came up with on the drive here. There wasn’t any way somebody could fake the things we said to each other, the things we did. I knew that. So why was there a small part of me that was hurt? Who was contemplating the possibility that they were true. Of course it wasn’t… right?

I waited in that bed, saving my forgiveness for when he’d burst through the door five minutes later groveling at my feet, begging for mercy. I waited, despite the tears on my face that somehow knew he wasn’t. I waited and waited and waited. He never showed. That’s when I sobbed, big, heaving, blubbering ones. I sat there crying for what felt like forever, until I couldn’t even produce tears anymore. And then I got angry.

Pressing my nurse’s button, I ripped the IV out of my wrist and the other machines checking my vitals, watching blood trickle all along the sheets. I didn’t care about it. I couldn’t stay another second in this fucking place. If Mikey wanted nothing to do with me after I healed, then I’ll do him something better. The nurse ran in panicked, eyes wide. I watched her gape at the sheets, at the flatlining monitors and then at me. I didn’t even give her time to speak. I had already begun to stand.

I need to get out of here, I told her, lifting myself up from the bed.

She charged at me, trying to push my shoulders back down but I wouldn’t budge. What are you doing? Your wounds haven’t healed yet!

I repeated myself, but she was still panicking, going off about something I refused to care about. Irritated, I take the collar of her scrubs and yank, bringing her close to me. Listen to me, I need to get the fuck out of this building and if you don’t help me, I’m going to find a fire escape and do it that way. Or maybe I’ll jump out of the window, break my fucking neck. Can you live with knowing somebody died on your watch because you wouldn’t help them? Would you be able to stomach it?

The words coming out of my mouth were unrecognizable to me. I got petty with my friends and said shit I didn’t mean, but this was cruel and excessive. I guess this what Mikey was turning me into.

I let her go only after she nods her agreement, looking ready to burst into tears by the second. First, I’ll need a disguise. No matter what Mikey had just told me, I knew he wouldn’t let me out of his sight if he caught me doing this. And being trapped around Mikey was not going to fly. Fuck no. Where’s the clothes you came in wearing?

I-In my bag in our locker rooms, she stammered.

Bring them. I need to change.

She went out of the room and came back, bag in trembling hand. I dressed quickly and keeping my head down, I allowed her to sneak me straight out of the building and around the back where her car was parked. Then I asked her to drive me somewhere.

What? I can’t d—

Why not? I asked without caring to consider her feelings. The poor woman probably didn’t get paid enough for this. Is there anybody else Bonten gives a fuck about that requires you giving them medical attention?

N-no.

Good. I grinned. That means you’re off for the day. Now drive. You don’t have to worry about Mikey, this is what he wanted. A half truth considering he certainly wouldn’t have wanted me to be out of his life this quickly, but I skipped a few steps for my sanity and his life. If I had to be in his vicinity I probably would have killed him.

We got in the car and sped off, me giving her directions as soon as she started driving. I watched the building grow smaller and smaller in the rearview, doing my best to ignore the thudding in my heart. The pain. The stress of everything I had been through on top of this bullshit. My thigh throbbed dully in reminder beneath the bandage. Eventually, we arrived at the destination of my choice, and I was sure to thank her for everything she did. I couldn’t give her anything but gratitude. I didn’t have any money. My phone was still in that torture room where I left it, and all the shit Mikey bought me most likely didn’t survive in that collision that got me kidnapped in the first place. I was grateful for that last one. I needed no reminders of him.

I quickly hopped out of the car, hobbling toward the door of the place I had requested to go. The nurse, who’s name I realized I never asked for, pulled out of the yard before I even entered the door. Couldn’t say I blamed her. I pressed the ringer on the door, pushing on it when it buzzed open. Immediately the stench of animal hit me full force. The sound of dogs barking and cats meowing brought a smile to my face.

Then I heard him. Who’s at the d- His words got caught in his throat, most likely at the sight of me.

Hey, Dee. I had cried all my tears out for the day in that bed. I could only express my emotions in humor. The boss hasn’t fired me yet, right?

Then I started to fall, but he caught me just in time, sobbing my name into my neck. I hugged him back tightly, heart bursting for an entirely different reason now. I was safe. I was home.

Six months came and went in a blur. I spent most of it being interrogated by police and interviewers alike. I kept my stories the same. I didn’t know my kidnappers. I never saw their faces. I never knew why I was kidnapped. Despite the fact that I could draw a detailed picture of Mikey’s face in my sleep, I didn’t sell out Bonten. I had gotten into the last predicament by them thinking I was an enemy, I didn’t want to prove that I actually was one. And besides, I wanted nothing to do with him or atleast that was the story I was feeding myself.

I never saw Natalie again. I didn’t know what Mikey did with her, and I didn’t have it in me to care. My conversations with Angel and Tati stopped a bit after they realized that too. I was glad. I was starting to grow tired of pretending I missed the traitor, and they were tired of pretending like they didn’t resent me for being the one who made it out.

Darren and I were practically inseparable. He had become my right hand, driving me around to physical therapy, helping me assimilate back into society, and still managed to keep the last bit of normalcy I had before I left during work, cracking jokes as if nothing happened. From the outside looking in, it almost was as if nothing did happen, but you had to look closer. I couldn’t sleep at night. Nightmares plagued my dreams every waking day, either of Koda, Mikey’s men who had groped me, or Mikey himself. The only time I managed to sleep was on my lunch breaks, much to Darren’s dismay. But other than that? I was okay, doing what I loved again and surrounded by genuine people.

Now Darren was convinced that what I was missing was a social life. Just come out with me, Vee. It’s just drinks at a bar with a few of my friends. We’ll even leave before 11pm.

Because your bedtime is 10, I teased, laughing when he nudged me.

I’m serious, he whined. It won’t be awkward I promise they already know- He cut himself off.

Perhaps that was the most awkward part of all of this. Everybody knew me now as the girl who survived her ‘kidnapper’. Imagine what they’d think if I told them that technically he wasn’t my kidnapper. They’d probably faint if they found out I fucked him too.

It’s okay, Dee. I was all over the news. They’re bound to know.

Still, they’re not assholes. They won’t treat you any differently. I promise. And if you’re still uncomfortable we could leave and I’ll never bother you about this again for the rest of my life. Pretty please?

I mentally groaned. Darren could get annoying when he was pleading, and it wasn’t like I had anything else to do. My routine consisted of home, work, school, occasional grocery store, gym and repeat. Nothing else exciting.

Fine, I relented, trying not to smile at his loud whoops. But I’m leaving at 10 alright?

Alright, he cheered, hugging me. Let me text the guys right now! This is going to be awesome! You won’t regret this , Vee.

I sure hoped so.

#yeah FUCK mikey #he thought i was just gonna stick around? fuck him! #and i finally ate :P don’t worry #SORRY THIS IS SO LONG MOD I TIMESKIPPED THE BITCH #🗝; citizen #🗝; mikey #🗝; chronicles of vee: vol. 1

[diamond-anon]

Psst do all of the get to know me questions

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? it was a while go, with a girl i went on a date with to 6 flags

2. Are you outgoing or shy? very shy

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? my friend brook at school tomorrow and a camp friend in march

4. Are you easy to get along with? sort of

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? my ex best friend but we hardly talk

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? I tend to be attracted to other people with autism which is good for me

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? doubt it but id love it

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? not really anyone 

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? not at all

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? my dad, we talked about M*A*S*H

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “thank you I’m so glad you enjoyed it”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? seasons of love, light my candle, belief, 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? yes but only people I trust

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? sort of

15. What good thing happened this summer? I went to camp

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?absolutely

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? I think there is life in other universes so we cant reach them

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? ew no 

19. Do you like bubble baths? yes

20. Do you like your neighbors? I don’t trust either side 

21. What are you bad habits? I pull out my eyelashes and 

22. Where would you like to travel?

23. Do you have trust issues? very much so

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? warming my voice up in the morning

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? my boobs. I don’t want them.

26. What do you do when you wake up? I cover my head up with blankets

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? not really

28. Who are you most comfortable around? I’m not completely comfortable with anyone 

29. Have any of your exs told you they regret breaking up? yes

30. Do you ever want to get married? yes but I don’t see that happening

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? nope I keep it short

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? laura osnes and Jeremy Jordan oops

33. Spell your name with your chin. duamonf

34. Do you play sports? What sports? I miss playing soccer

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? tv

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? yes pretty much constantly now

37. What do you say during awkward silences? I don’t feel the need to fill silence unless I’m nervous 

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? sweet, willing to help with my disabilities and someone to grow and build with

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? I like spencers bc its fun and hot topic bc merch 

40. What do you want to do after high school? I don’t know I didn’t see myself making it past 15 

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends on what they did

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? nothing… I’m usually quiet

43. Do you smile at strangers? I try to

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?outerspace

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

46. What are you paranoid about? almost everything 

47. Have you ever been high? two days ago 

48. Have you ever been drunk? I’m a literal alcoholic

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

51. Ever wished you were someone else? pretty much every day

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? probably that I’m autistic

53. Favourite makeup brand? I don’t wear makeup

54. Favourite store? I’m not sure

55. Favourite blog? I love too many but all the anons 

56. Favourite colour? red or black

57. Favourite food? Mexican or chinese

58. Last thing you ate? burrito

59. First thing you ate this morning? half a bagel

60. Ever won a competition? For what? yes I used to do well in spelling bees and my soccer team won a SoCal tournament

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? ive been suspended several times for fighting

62. Been arrested? For what? yes,having a weapon on me

63. Ever been in love? yes

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? it was with an asshole guy who broke up with me while i was in the hospital for a suicide attempt65. Are you hungry right now? no

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? yes, I don’t have many irl friends

67. Facebook or Twitter? neither

68. Twitter or Tumblr? tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? sort of? I’m watching newsies on netflix

70. Names of your bestfriends? Kathryn, Megan, Brooke, Jason

71. Craving something? What? idk.. being loved

72. What colour are your towels? sort of a cream color

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? one and one body pillow to elevate my leg

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? I sleep with one

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I’m not sure, theyre all very small

75. Favourite animal? fox, elephant, hedgehog

76. What colour is your underwear? red

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? mint chocolate chip or peanut butter chocolate 

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? black

80. What colour pants? grey

81. Favourite tv show? M*A*S*H

82. Favourite movie? big hero 6

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? mean girls

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? 

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? 21 jump street

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? dory

87. First person you talked to today? megan

88. Last person you talked to today?

@avocado-anon

89. Name a person you hate? rainy

90. Name a person you love? idk

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? several

92. In a fight with someone? not rn

93. How many sweatpants do you have? last I checked I had 14

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 5

95. Last movie you watched? big hero 6

96. Favourite actress? all I can think of rn is laura osnes so her 

97. Favourite actor? Jeremy Jordan (I rewatched bonnie and clyde and I’m thinking about it)

98. Do you tan a lot? I don’t like the sun. it makes my head hurt

99. Have any pets? a dog

100. How are you feeling? not good

101. Do you type fast? very

102. Do you regret anything from your past? a lot

103. Can you spell well? when I write yes, not outloud

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? very much

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? yes

106. Ever broken someones heart? yes, when I broke up with my abuser

107. Have you ever been on a horse? I work with them so very often

108. What should you be doing? painting a poster for my friends birthday

109. Is something irritating you right now? that I cant think clearly

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? yes

111. Do you have trust issues? very much

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? my therapist

113. What was your childhood nickname? I did but I’m not going to tell you

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? only to mexico

115. Do you play the Wii? yes 

116. Are you listening to music right now? yes I’m listening to my musicals playlist

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? of course

118. Do you like Chinese food? LOVE IT

119. Favourite book? the perks of being a wallflower

120. Are you afraid of the dark? nope I love it

121. Are you mean? kind of

122. Is cheating ever okay? no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? not at all

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

125. Do you believe in true love? yeah

126. Are you currently bored? yes

127. What makes you happy? singing

128. Would you change your name? already have

129. What your zodiac sign? capricorn

130. Do you like subway? ew no

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? ask them out

132. Whos the last person you had a deep conversation with? my dad

133. Favourite lyrics right now? all the lyrics from you will be found

134. Can you count to one million? technically I can but I don’t want to

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? that I’m straight

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? I can only sleep w doors closed

137. How tall are you? 5 1

138. Curly or Straight hair? i like straight hair

139. Brunette or Blonde? I like blonde

140. Summer or Winter? winter

141. Night or Day? night

142. Favourite month? january

143. Are you a vegetarian? no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? dark chocolate

145. Tea or Coffee? coffe

146. Was today a good day? fuck no

147. Mars or Snickers? snickers

148. What’s your favourite quote? yeet yeet chicken feet

149. Do you believe in ghosts? yes i see them

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, whats the first line on that page? “tell me about darry” from the outsiders

#about diamond

[razzledazzlefoshazzle]

1-200?

200:

My crush’s name is: Cassie

199:

I was born in: 1998, Australia, NSW

198:

I am really: I am really annoyed that you wanna know so much about me anon y u do dis

197:

My cellphone company is: Optus

196:

My eye color is: Brown

195:

My shoe size is: 11 Australia Mens

194:

My ring size is: i dont know

193:

My height is: 181cm or 5′10″ i tihnk

192:

I am allergic to: NOTHING I AM UNSTOPPABLE

191:

My 1st car was: No Car

190:

My 1st job was: I was an assistant at some guys authentic pizza shop. He was an asshole and i shouldve killed him before quitting.

189:

Last book you read: Ready Player One

188:

My bed is: My bed is my one true love and warm machine luv u bb

187:

My pet:  I have 2 dogs they’re fluffy love muffins called Pepsi (boy) Bella (Girl) ill post photos of them later!

186:

My best friend:

@schotts-fired

at this point i have as many memes with Kat as i do my real life best friend.

185:

My favorite shampoo is: Really nice smelling ones.

184:

Xbox or ps3: PS3

183:

Piggy banks are: Piggy banks are dumb i have a golden pineapple for my spare change.

182:

In my pockets:  earphones.

181:

On my calendar: every friday i do stuff but thats it

180:

Marriage is: cool

179:

Spongebob can: produce good memes

178:

My mom: Isnt nice i probably wont talk to her once i move out.

177:

The last three songs I bought were?Buying? Songs?

176:

Last YouTube video watched: Masculinity by Mr Sark

175:

How many cousins do you have? at least 3

174:

Do you have any siblings? 3 Brothers and a Sister ive seen twice

173:

Are your parents divorced? Yes

172:

Are you taller than your mom? Hell yeah shes a goblin at like 150cm.

171:

Do you play an instrument? No

170:

What did you do yesterday? I slept, watched movies, complained about the internet being down.

[ I Believe In ]

169:

Love at first sight: Not unless its a dog

168:

Luck: No but if someone does something better than me they’re lucky >:(

167:

Fate: No

166:

Yourself: No

165:

Aliens: I wish they would fix everything

164:

Heaven: Questioning my religious beliefs lately

163:

Hell: ^

162:

God: ^

161:

Horoscopes: No but they’re funny to read

160:

Soul mates: No.

159:

Ghosts: NOT BUT LIKE ALIENS I WANT THEM TO BE REAL GHOSTS PLEASE BE REAL.

158:

Gay Marriage: Yah its about as good as straight marriage

157:

War: its about as shit as i am

156:

Orbs: what are these?

155:

Magic: Refer to both ghosts and aliens.

[ This or That ]

154:

Hugs or Kisses: Hugs

153:

Drunk or High: Drunk

152:

Phone or Online: Online

151:

Red heads or Black haired: Red Heads

150:

Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes

149:

Hot or cold: Cold

148:

Summer or winter: Winter

147:

Autumn or Spring: Spring

146:

Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate

145:

Night or Day: Night

144:

Oranges or Apples: Apples

143:

Curly or Straight hair: Straight

142:

McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds

141:

White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: White Chocolate

140:

Mac or PC: PC

139:

Flip flops or high heals: High heals like healing in video games am i right?

138:

Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and Poor

137:

Coke or Pepsi: Coke

136:

Hillary or Obama: Obama

135:

Burried or cremated: Burried so i may rise again!

134:

Singing or Dancing: Dancing

133:

Coach or Chanel: What

132:

Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks:Who

131:

Small town or Big city: Big City

130:

Wal-Mart or Target: Target

129:

Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Adam Sandler

128:

Manicure or Pedicure: neither? 

127:

East Coast or West Coast: East coast cause western australia is a bunch of weirdos

126:

Your Birthday or Christmas: My birthday cause giving gifts is hard and spending time with people is easy.

125:

Chocolate or Flowers:Chocolate

124:

Disney or Six Flags: Disney

123:

Yankees or Red Sox: is that sports?

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122:

War: War Never Changes

121:

George Bush: He definitely did sleep with that woman.

120:

Gay Marriage: Good again!

119:

The presidential election: Trump is a rollercoaster of emotion ranging from bad to worse. At least the memes are good!

118:

Abortion: Choice

117:

MySpace: Had some pretty good games on it

116:

Reality TV: awful

115:

Parents:  My parents? Out of the 4 ive had i like one of them.

114:

Back stabbers: What kind of question is this i hate them.

113:

Ebay: Dont use ebay really.

112:

Facebook: The thing i use so real life friends can contact me its trash.

111:

Work: My experiences have been, less than pleasant.

110:

My Neighbors: I dont know any of my neighbours but they’re rude and dont reply to my hello’s.

109:

Gas Prices: i dont fucking know

108:

Designer Clothes: I dont care for clothes i wear tshirts and trackies all the time.

107:

College: No opinion on call egg.

106:

Sports: Fun to play boring to watch

105:

My family: i like my dad and my brothers

104:

The future: must be better than now?

[ Last time I ]

103:

Hugged someone: someone i wasnt related to like a month ago

102:

Last time you ate: literally always

101:

Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: last friday

100:

Cried in front of someone: fucking years ago i dont cry in front of people anymore

99:

Went to a movie theater: like a month ago

98:

Took a vacation: never

97:

Swam in a pool: 3 months ago

96:

Changed a diaper: never

95:

Got my nails done: a year ago

94:

Went to a wedding: also a year ago

93:

Broke a bone: never

92:

Got a peircing: never

91:

Broke the law: never

90:

Texted: couple hours ago

[ MISC ]

89:

Who makes you laugh the most: myself, anime

@schotts-fired

88:

Something I will really miss when I leave home is: the internet

87:

The last movie I saw: Taking of Pelham 123

86:

The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Finding my happiness again

85:

The thing im not looking forward to: my ex making social interactions awkward again

84:

People call me: Jack

83:

The most difficult thing to do is: get out of bed, finish breakfast

82:

I have gotten a speeding ticket: no

81:

My zodiac sign is: Sagittarius 

80:

The first person i talked to today was:

@whoneedsasociallife

79:

First time you had a crush: Primary School one of my Teachers

78:

The one person who i can’t hide things from: Nobody.

77:

Last time someone said something you were thinking: Constantly

76:

Right now I am talking to: Nobody

75:

What are you going to do when you grow up: Anything hopefully ill be happy

74:

I have/will get a job: Someday

73:

Tomorrow: Movies with dad, night with friends

72:

Today: nothing

71:

Next Summer: nothing

70:

Next Weekend: also nothing

69:

I have these pets: 2 diggity doggos

68:

The worst sound in the world: the sound my computer makes when it bluescreens while music it playing

67:

The person that makes me cry the most is: my ex

66:

People that make you happy: almost nobody

65:

Last time I cried: like 5 hours ago

64:

My friends are: trash shit garbage

63:

My computer is: absolute trash after so many issues im planning on getting a new one

62:

My School: sucked complete ass i was abused by a teacher

61:

My Car: doesnt exist

60:

I lose all respect for people who: no answer

59:

The movie I cried at was: anything that involves any form of friendship and love, or dogs dying

58:

Your hair color is: brown

57:

TV shows you watch: read my about

56:

Favorite web site: tumblr/youtube

55:

Your dream vacation: the fucking moon

54:

The worst pain I was ever in was: I had a cough last year that completely killed my voice and tore up my throat, coughed up blood

53:

How do you like your steak cooked: Well Done

52:

My room is: Clean and tidy af

51:

My favorite celebrity is: none

50:

Where would you like to be: in the future

49:

Do you want children: no

48:

Ever been in love: yes it fucking ruined me

47:

Who’s your best friend:

@schotts-fired

we already have more memes than my irl best friend

46:

More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends

45:

One thing that makes you feel great is: memes

44:

One person that you wish you could see right now: nobody tbh

43:

Do you have a 5 year plan: nope

42:

Have you made a list of things to do before you die: climb Mt. Everest, thats it

41:

Have you pre-named your children: nope

40:

Last person I got mad at: myself

39:

I would like to move to: a place with good internet

38:

I wish I was a professional: Twitch Streamer

[ My Favorites ]

37:

Candy: Red Licorice

36:

Vehicle: Shopping trolleys i guess

35:

President: Obama

34:

State visited: I dont travel

33:

Cellphone provider: Optus

32:

Athlete: None

31:

Actor: None

30:

Actress: None

29:

Singer: None

28:

Band: None

27:

Clothing store: None

26:

Grocery store:None

25:

TV show: Doctor Who

24:

Movie: Cant remember

23:

Website: Tumblr/Youtube

22:

Animal: Dogs

21:

Theme park: Wet n’ Wild

20:

Holiday: New Years

19:

Sport to watch: None

18:

Sport to play: None

17:

Magazine: None

16:

Book: Ready Player One

15:

Day of the week: Friday

14:

Beach: Nobbys Beach 

13:

Concert attended: None

12:

Thing to cook: Potato Bake

11:

Food: Pork Ribs

10:

Restaurant: Any place that sells pork ribs

9:

Radio station: None.

8:

Yankee candle scent: what

7:

Perfume: no

6:

Flower: any that can go in my hair like a hipster

5:

Color: Purple

4:

Talk show host: John Oliver

3:

Comedian: Louis C.K.

2:

Dog breed: Shiba Inu

1:

Did you answer all these truthfully? maybe i dont know myself

Fuck you anon you cant stop me im dedicated as heck and butts fight me.

:Update: I went and updated these cause my internet came back!

#asks #about me #question thing

[dimsumdamsel]

92 truths that you dont really need to know about me but im gonna tell you anyway ! !

rules: once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. at the end, choose 25 people to tag!

tagged by: @slavshiro ohoo THANK YOU ILY

LAST… [1] drink: water [2] phone call: my mom just called me to tell me to turn the stove on [3] text message: the love of my life, sonia!!! [4] song you listened to:  말이야 (I Mean That) by CLC!!! quality song  [5] time you cried:  dec 8 when i thought i only got 10/60 on my calc final cause i had an anxiety attack in the middle of it and called my cousin on her birthday and cried to her about being worthless and how my parents deserve a better daughter, one more like my successful brother :^) i havent cried since then because im even more dead than ive ever been :^)

HAVE YOU EVER… [6] dated someone twice: nope, i dont want to relive any of my past relationships; i mean it ended for a reason so? but maybe for a future relationship if it comes to it?? theres still an extremely low chance of it happening though lol  [7] been cheated on: not that i know of but probably not [8] kissed someone and regretted it: ksjngkejrnkgne yeah, elementary school with isaiah mike lmao what a mistake  [9] lost someone special: mmmm not recently  [10] been depressed: i’m honestly not sure– like its not bad enough to where i would need medicine but i do feel down, empty, and find it hard to be happy a lot?? its mostly cause of school but baHhhhahaH yikes dog pictures never fail to cheer me up though [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: im a good girl, i dont plan on drinking until im legally allowed to lmao even than, i probably would still be reluctant 

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS: [12] orange (orange clothes are ugly though) [13] cream / white !  [14] dark blues ! 

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: sweats honestly no, i havent made any new friends for a couple years now? i mean i met people form key club but i dont talk to them often  [16] fallen out of love: i guess  [17] laughed until you cried: i think so  [18] found out someone was talking about you: yO SO MY FRIEND TOLD ME TODAY THAT SOMEONE I DATED KEEPS TELLING MY OTHER FRIEND THAT HE MISSED ME AND honestly get over me please, like its been like what nine months now and youre not going to get anywhere with mulling in the past? dont bother other people about this because they dont want to hear it.  [19] met someone who changed you: NOT IN THE PAST YEAR KFKNDFKE [20] found out who your true friends are: i never have fake friends? like even if they wanted to gain something from me there would be nothing to get lmao [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: nAH

GENERAL… [22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: probably a little more than three fourths [23] do you have any pets: i have a six inch fish, my dad has a six inch fish, and my mom has two smaller three inch fish (the ones my dad and i own are at least five years old now and the ones my mom has are less than a year old) [24] do you want to change your name: nope, my parents chose it for me and i want to honor that, plus i dont think any other names would suit me  [25] what did you do for your last birthday: i went out to eat kbbq with sonia and then stayed home for the rest of the day !!!!! thank you sonia ohoo i would’ve just spent it doing nothing wihtout you kjngkjer [26] what time did you wake up: 6:30 am [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: dinking around on my phone probably [28] name something you cannot wait for: short term: the week to end, long term: owning a dog  [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: 3 minutes ago  [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i wish i was more confidant about myself and my ability to do things  [31] what are you listening to right now: good luck by aoa [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: i know a tommy??  [33] something that is getting on your nerves: :3 [34] most visited website: “tinklr dot hell” [35] elementary: i miss my elementary school friends : ( [36] high school: fuck the counselors  [37] college: high school + more crying honestly, i like it though, i feel more free (at least in the running start program lmao) im waiting to see if UW seattle and bothell want me next year though and i really want to die at the though of them not accepting me cause i’ll just be an even bigger disappointment to my family lol  [38] hair color: dark brown but a chestnut-ish color in the sun (i really want to dye my hair so its that chestnut color all the time though) [39] long or short hair: i like short hair but i currently have long hair thats three or four inches under my armpits, i plan on cutting it soon though [40] do you have a crush on someone: no serious ones, just the “wow he smiled at me “ and “gOd he held the door for me i am Snatched” kind of little crushes [41] what do you like about yourself?: i like that i was able to make good friends [42] piercings: ears [43] blood type: B+ i think– not completely sure if im + or - but i know its B for sure [44] nickname: none, just pet names from sonia and jiejie by gil ohoo [45] relationship status: single and not really looking for anything, i just want a dog [46] zodiac sign: sagittarius [47] pronouns: she/her [48] fav tv show: i surprisingly have a lot of favorite american shows like bones, psych, monk, criminal minds, leverage, saving hope, pushing daisies, ghost whisperer, basically all shows on ion tv minus law&order, then theres gravity falls and bobs burger, and then a bunch of animes and dramas [49] tattoos: none but ive always wanted one either on my wrist or inner arm ! [50] right or left handed: right handed

FIRST… [51] surgery: never  [52] piercing: ears [53] best friend: lisa! we’ve literally known each other since we were born and shes always going to be my favorite cousin and one of my best friends [54] sport: track  [55] vacation: dont remember very well?? i saw some vcr tapes of us going to disney in 2001 though [56] pair of trainers: ive never had any trainers, just running shoes?? i had small red sandals that squeaked whenever i walked when i was a kid though 

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: nothing [58] drinking: water (ive been drinking so much water lately but i’m always thirsty so i lowkey think theres something wrong with me) [59] i’m about to: knock out  [60] listening to:  情歌王 by leo ku (its like a compilation of classic love songs thats 13 minutes long but i could sing the entire thing karaoke style easily)  [61] waiting for: death  [62] want: to not disappoint my parents, my friends, or myself anymore  [63] get married: eventually i guess  [64] career: student, scribe/visual interpreter/reader/proctor for my college’s DSS 

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: hugs !  [66] lips or eyes: eyes ! ! which is funny cause making eye contact with people makes me Uncomfortable  [67] shorter or taller: taller please, im tired of being the taller friend and i want to feel small for once  [68] older or younger: older, i’ve had enough with younger guys lmao  [69] romantic or spontaneous: romantic but spontaneous is good too  [70] nice arms or nice stomach: arms i guess  [71] sensitive or loud: sensitive?? [72] hook up or relationship: relationship wtf i dont even get how hook ups work alright  [73] troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant lmao 

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? no what the heck [75] drank hard liquor? nope  [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? lost contacts (which sucks cause i wear hard contacts since they cant make soft ones with my prescription and only replace them once a year, thankfully i can use the ones from previous years) but never glasses  [77] turned someone down: no  [78] sex on first date? yikes no  [79] broken someone’s heart? ya but it was for the best [80] had your own heart broken? ya but i was never that sad about it [81] been arrested? no oml i sweat every time i see cop cars [82] cried when someone died? no one close to me has died so far, but i def cried at the ladies’ code car accident  [83] fallen for a friend: nope 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? i want to  [85] miracles? yes but i have yet to witness any [86] love at first sight? mmmm to a certain extent– i think its mostly based on looks but when you get to know them that when the real love happens [87] santa claus? used to exist probably  [88] kiss on the first date? depends  [89] angels? yeah, why not 

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: sonia del casal : ) [91] eye colour: dark brown [92] favourite movie: listen ive watched your name (kimi no na wa) a grand total of sixteen (16) times and i could still watch it another ten times (i love to suffer)

tagging @sweet-hunny, @hideous-kojimmies , @panda-p-king, @puervy , @otonai , @izumiiz , @hxanns , anyone cause yikes i dont know very many people

#no need to actually do it if i tagged to too btw #its just for fun and whatever #thank you for tagging me again though ohohohoh ily #dimsums demise

[we-are-the-sickness]

just do em all

1. selfieMoBile
2. what would you name your future kids?Vienna if it's a girl or James Taylor if it's a boy 
3. do you miss anyone?Definitely 
4. what are you looking forward to?Death rn
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?My friends n their memes they KNO how to cheer me 
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?I think it depends on how much of myself Ive share w them ya know?
7. what was your life like last year?Confused and sad 
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?@my mom u did dis
9. who did you last see in person?My parents
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?Generally
11. are you listening to music right now?Nope I just woke up lol
12. what is something you want right now?Peace n quiet 
13. how do you feel right now?Lil sad
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?Last night 
15. personality descriptionTired mom friend who loves memes n loves to be light hearted bc she's been heavy hearted too damn longJst wanna raise bees
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?YES FAR TOO LONG
17. opinion on insecurities.I'm sad that we all have them
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?Fuck no
19. have you ever been to New York?Nope but I wanna!
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?The entirety of hardwired to self destruct like there's not one bad song !!
21. age and birthday?18 and my birthday is today whoop
22. description of crush.She smol she funny she lame as hell but she's also beautiful in the most innocent way she tries to make herself tough but Ive seen her from every angle and that's why I love her so much
23. fear(s)Clusters of holes yuck
24. height5'1
25. role modelCorey Taylor & James Hetfield
26. idol(s)^
27. things i hateWhen things aren't organized, petty arguments, when someone can so easily fix something but they just won't cause they are suborn 
28. i’ll love you if…U put memes in my mailbox
29. favourite film(s)Every xmen ever
30. favourite tv show(s)Daredevil, Grimm, bloodline, and I'm already calling that iron fist is a fave
31. 3 random factsI need to peeI have a justice for all poster on the wall in front of meMy toe nail is still broken
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?It's p equal as of right now
33. something you want to learnTo sing better
34. most embarrassing momentI was at our local butcher shop I was only a little ginger toddler happy as can be loved going to this place w my mom, I usually could walk around and look at BBQ sauces or something while mom chose what we needed. It was thanks giving time and I saw this box that I THOUGHT had a turkey in it on top of this table. I just touched the box and suddenly the table fell over then shelves and shelves of sauces started falling over it was a domino effect and still to this day I don't understand it
35. favourite subjectAstronomy 
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?Raise beesSurround myself with peace and love and mountainsAnd have someone to share it w
37. favourite actor/actressBen m that is all
38. favourite comedian(s)JOHN MULANY
39. favourite sport(s)Archery coz I do it lmao
40. favourite memoryPlaying tag with my dog when I was a kiddo
41. relationship statusComplicated bc of distance
42. favourite book(s)Corey's....
43. favourite song everNo leaf clover 
44. age you get mistaken for25
45. how you found out about your idolWhen I was a kid our cable got turned off a lot so I spent a lot of time in my room with my dads construction radio listening to music. That's how I discovered everyone.
46. what my last text message saysHit that motherfrkn like button
47. turn onsU also enjoy peace and not hurting me constantly
48. turn offsU hurt me constantly and have a shit attitude and don't want organization
49. where i want to be right nowAway from here
50. favourite picture of your idolI WISH I WASNT ON MOBILE
51. starsignAquarius 
52. something i’m talented atIdk painting? Giving advice? Who knows
53. 5 things that make me happyHerY'allMusicWarm airCDs
54. something thats worrying me at the momentEverything 
55. tumblr friendsSO MANY
56. favourite food(s)Mexican food,,,
57. favourite animal(s)Wolf n bears
58. description of my best friendThey are kind and funny and make everyday brighter ❤️
59. why i joined tumblrAn old pal asked me to join 
60. ask me anything you want:0THANK U ❤️💗❤️

[wejustsurvive]

1-150

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? i actually think its haley XD if not her then sam2. Are you outgoing or shy? im in between. new people make me shy, but i can be outgoing with people im comfortable with3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? meh4. Are you easy to get along with? i think so5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? i can take care of myself thanks6. What kind of people are you attracted to? the wrong kind7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? who knows8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? nope9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? not at all10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? probs emily11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? thank you 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? 

Clairvoyant, you used to say, dead bird, how does it feel, i think your nose is bleeding.13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? i LOVE IT14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? yes 15. What good thing happened this summer? i camped my life away16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? isnt that what a boyfriend is?17. Do you think there is life on other planets? obv.18. Do you still talk to your first crush? nope19. Do you like bubble baths? nope20. Do you like your neighbors? yeah my neighbor is my grandma, we have tea every morning

21. What are your bad habits? seeing the good in people after they have fucked me up. Always trying to help people.22. Where would you like to travel? all over canada, and greece, and thailand23. Do you have trust issues? yup24. Favorite part of your daily routine? lmao blazing? idk i dont have much of a routine25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? my stomach26. What do you do when you wake up? hate my life27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? darker28. Who are you most comfortable around? sam29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? ummm not really, kyle said we could of worked through our shit when we first broke up but i believe we were made to be friends30. Do you ever want to get married? yes i do, i want my papa to walk me down the isle31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? soooo long32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Any and all Avengers. JS33. Spell your name with your chin. hnaqy7l4eyu34. Do you play sports? What sports? LMFAO 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? tv36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? yee37. What do you say during awkward silences? well this is fun38. Describe your dream girl/guy? someone willing to go the extra mile just like i am39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? second hand stores40. What do you want to do after high school? die41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? yes i do42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? im v sad and anxiety43. Do you smile at strangers? yes44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? bottom of the ocean45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? my animals46. What are you paranoid about? people hating me and driving with weed47. Have you ever been high? all day er day48. Have you ever been drunk? YUP XD49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? not really, i wish people would actually find out about some things...50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? black lol51. Ever wished you were someone else? every second52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? lol everything on the outside53. Favourite makeup brand? urban decay54. Favourite store? i dont have one55. Favourite blog? not anymore56. Favourite colour? pink57. Favourite food? sushi58. Last thing you ate? some chippies59. First thing you ate this morning? People eat in the morning????60. Ever won a competition? For what? LOL NO61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? nope62. Been arrested? For what? nope63. Ever been in love? is this love?64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? jon browne, caught on video. Was not expecting it65. Are you hungry right now? no66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? i dont have tumblr friends anymore :’(67. Facebook or Twitter? twitter68. Twitter or Tumblr? twitter69. Are you watching tv right now? nope70. Names of your bestfriends?kyle  haley suzie emily71. Craving something? What? ugh72. What colour are your towels? grey72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 273. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? no real animals74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? too many for a adult75. Favourite animal? tigers76. What colour is your underwear? leopard print XD whoda guess77. Chocolate or Vanilla? vanilla78. Favourite ice cream flavour? ????? something fun79. What colour shirt are you wearing?light blue night with cats 80. What colour pants? i never wear pants when im home81. Favourite tv show? supernatural 82. Favourite movie? fuck too many, something avengers83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? mean girls84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? 21 jump street85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? janice86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? the turtles maybe87. First person you talked to today? my Dog and yes hes a person88. Last person you talked to today? ive only talked to my dog XD89. Name a person you hate? My uncle90. Name a person you love? my Aunt Mary91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? YEEE 92. In a fight with someone? Like maybe? ask them, theyre the ones sending anon hate93. How many sweatpants do you have? 2 pairs, need more for work94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 595. Last movie you watched? ant man and the wasp96. Favourite actress? honestly no clue. i dont pay attention to that stuff97. Favourite actor? if i have a favourite its not for their acting skills so98. Do you tan a lot? nope and nope99. Have any pets? i have a zoo. And honestly im so proud of my family i wish i could introduce everyone i care for to them100. How are you feeling? honestly tumblr, not great. Ive been down the last couple months and i keep trying to get back where i was mentally but i having a hard time. Many things are getting me down and i want to fix them but somethings are out of my control. And i never taught myself how to cope with that101. Do you type fast? pretty fucking fast i work on the computer A LOT

102. Do you regret anything from your past? I regret little things, like not speaking up and telling people how i feel from the start. Its fucked up a lot in my life. But without going through and doing what i did i wouldnt be the compassionate person i am today.103. Can you spell well? sometimes when i dont overthink it104. Do you miss anyone from your past? yes105. Ever been to a bonfire party? YES AND I WANT TO GO TO ANOTHER106. Ever broken someone’s heart? honestly, i have a couple times. Im not proud of it and i wish it could of been different but life happens107. Have you ever been on a horse? yes i love horseys108. What should you be doing? moving on and letting go109. Is something irritating you right now? yeah thats one way of putting it110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? lmao yes111. Do you have trust issues? so many112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Sam, always sam113. What was your childhood nickname? bird114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yes i wanna go back to alberta115. Do you play the Wii? not anymore116. Are you listening to music right now? i was117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? yes118. Do you like Chinese food? YES119. Favourite book? acheron or Fahrenheit 451120. Are you afraid of the dark? not anymore121. Are you mean? people perceive me as mean sometimes because i like to be honest these days122. Is cheating ever okay? no its not.123. Can you keep white shoes clean? bitch i dont buy white shoes124. Do you believe in love at first sight? hahaha i belive in lust in first site 125. Do you believe in true love? yes126. Are you currently bored? umm not the word i would use so no127. What makes you happy? when my animals are healthy128. Would you change your name? i wanted to when i was young but nah129. What your zodiac sign? gemini130. Do you like subway? yes131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? tell him to cool his jets. Been there done that. Did not work. We are happy as friends and get a long way better132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? honestly probably emily133. Favourite lyrics right now? i love this question

This is your life, there's no way to run from itThe doubt in your brain, or the pain in your stomachI only have the one complaint at the momentDon't paint me black when I used to be golden. 

 134. Can you count to one million? nope, dont have an attention span that long135. Dumbest lie you ever told? i work for telus136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? open for the cats137. How tall are you? 5′5 and a half138. Curly or Straight hair? wavy139. Brunette or Blonde? blonde140. Summer or Winter? summer141. Night or Day? night142. Favourite month? june143. Are you a vegetarian? nope144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? milk chocolate145. Tea or Coffee? tea146. Was today a good day? i just woke up, no147. Mars or Snickers? mars148. What’s your favourite quote? its on my wall

The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift. 

 149. Do you believe in ghosts? yup150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?  the books close to me are all notebooks. page 42 is blank