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adjit · 11 months
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So what really happened in Red Robin between Dick and Tim?
Because I am constantly seeing misrepresentations of it, I want to talk about the actual events of Red Robin, and Dick and Tim's relationship during it. It's a favorite storyline for fandom to use and riff on, and so for people who haven't read the source, it's hard to know what is canon and what is fanon.
Honestly? It might be easier to just go read the issues. The majority of what I'm going to discuss here all happens in the first 4 issues of Red Robin (though I cover some stuff through the first 12), and I enjoyed that entire run, but if you'd rather hear a random internet user tell ya their take on it, read on.
This is going under a cut because it's long. But TLDR? Dick is not the bad guy in this situation. No one is the bad guy in this situation. If we had to name one... poor coping skills? And though they do fight, they ultimately reconcile because Tim and Dick are brothers who love each other.
Damian
First things first, let's talk about Damian. Did Dick give Robin to Damian without even informing Tim, so Tim had to find out by Damian showing up in the Robin costume? Not exactly.
So, some technicalities. Damian had worn the costume before the infamous Batcave scene. In Batman: Battle for the Cowl #3, he's given it by Alfred and goes with Squire to save Tim. So, not only has Damian worn the costume before, Tim has seen it.
However, arguably this is also before Dick has accepted the mantle, so the scene in the cave is still notable as it is Dick specifically informing Tim that Damian will be his Robin. And Tim had also worn the costume out for a one-time rescue months before he officially became Robin (also enabled by Alfred), so I'm still of the idea that the cave scene is The Scene about the Robin mantle being passed down.
That being the case, I'm still going to defend Dick anyway.
Firstly, he told Tim before Damian showed up. But it's true that he didn't give Tim a choice, and that Tim was NOT okay with it.
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Damian shows up and talks some shit, Tim punches him in the face, and then storms out.
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Overall, it went pretty terribly! But I'm of the opinion that there was no good ending here. Damian needs the family connection that the mantle of Robin would give him in order to feel accepted, not to mention the close supervision that the duo of Batman and Robin would provide. But Tim is extremely attached to Robin 14 years after this comic and he still hasn't given it up and would never be happy being asked to give it up, especially when he's already lost so many things. One of them was going to end up unhappy. (Fwiw, I'm of the opinion that Dick is right, and Damian needs Robin a lot more than Tim does. But that doesn't mean that that decision wouldn't hurt Tim, too.)
Arguably, Dick could have been a bit nicer when doing this, but let's be fair to Dick: his father figure has just died, and suddenly he has to be Batman, and he now has a young child he is partly in charge of. That's a lot to be dumped on his lap, not to mention that he didn't want to be Batman (he initially refused despite Bruce's wishes, and only took it on after basically being forced to after Jason tried to take on the mantle, killed a bunch of people, and injured both Damian and Tim), and said child is a highly traumatized child who is still in the process of basically cult de-conditioning! So Tim could also be asked to be a lot more understanding than he's being. But Tim's too wrapped up in his own grief to see that. Just like Dick's too wrapped up in his own issues to properly deal with Tim.
He has a lot of shit going on and he can't juggle it all. Tim is coping incredibly poorly with his own circumstances. They clash and neither comes out happy. It sucked. But to say that Dick is the bad guy here... He made the best decision he could when given no right options. I do think that he made a mistake here in his approach, but to call his entire relationship with Tim into question due to it... doesn't make as much sense to me (especially because of the events which follow!)
Self-isolation
So, did everyone abandon Tim? Did his family forget him and leave him out to dry?
Absolutely not. The opposite, really. Tim pushed everyone away, despite them repeatedly reaching out to him.
One thing to note about Tim here is that he is self-isolating extremely hard. Even after their argument about Robin, Dick keeps trying to reach out to Tim. Tim pushes him away. Tim pushes everyone away. And this is not even subtle- it's shown in the text very clearly.
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Multiple people try to talk to Tim, and Tim absolutely refuses them.
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Tim is pissed even at the idea that Dick might be checking up on him. And Tim and Steph's relationship is super rocky right now, and he takes her concern for him poorly. Part of that can be attributed to an ongoing fight between them, a lack of trust implicit there, but combined with everything else it's also clearly Tim pushing away all of his lifelines.
Cassie also comes to try to check on him- after he dodges her attempts to contact him, she flies all the way to Gotham. But when told that a man who everyone knows as dead, and whose body was recovered and buried, is still alive, she doesn't believe him. (And considering Cassie has already dealt with Tim's grief regarding Conner and his suuuuuper rational reaction there, one might understand even more why she doesn't believe him right away.) And Tim immediately pushes her away for it. He doesn't try to give her any explanation, doesn't respond to her concern, he just immediately cuts the cord.
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(And just a note that when Cassie doesn't know who else to turn to about Tim? She turns to Dick! Because she knows how important Dick is to Tim. And yes, right now Tim is mad at Dick and resents that Steph and Cassie go to him, but that doesn't change the fact that when people think about caring for Tim, Dick is the first person they go to.)
Dick and Tim's argument
Did Dick refuse to believe Tim, despite Tim having evidence, call him crazy and threaten to throw him in Arkham? NOPE.
That is entirely fanon. And one of the more pervasive, and annoying, misrepresentations of Dick's character, as it causes people to talk shit about him.
So. What actually happened? (We're getting into full pages here because I am not letting anyone get this conversation twisted.)
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Dick shows up and speaks to Tim compassionately, though decisively, about the fact that Bruce is dead and they need to learn to move on and deal with that grief in a healthy manner. He then offers help to Tim once more, and is rejected, Tim instead opting to start a fight in classic emotionally-repressed Bat tradition. (Which, sidenote, do you think they do this just so that panels during a long conversation are more dynamic instead of two people standing there talking to each other?)
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Tim pleads his case to Dick....to an extent. Notice, however, that he never mentions that he has any reason to believe what he does. Doesn't even try to convince Dick to believe him, really. Just insists that he's right after he makes a good case on why he does in fact sound crazy.
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And then, Dick offers help. He suggests that Tim talk to a therapist. This person is, notably, NOT ARKHAM ASYLUM. Isn't even secretly Arkham, because they're in Metropolis!
And, frankly, the idea that someone suggesting therapy to his brother who is dealing poorly with grief has been equated to "calling him crazy and trying to get him thrown in jail/committed" is absolutely bonkers to me. I know that it's more likely that someone escalated the stakes for drama in their fanfic or something, and for some reason that's the version that circulated, but from here to there is a LEAP. And for people to claim it's canon is frustrating to say the least.
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And finally. Tim tells Dick to let him leave. And Dick does. Dick stops trying to stop Tim, and lets him go. He trusts in Tim enough to let him do what he thinks is right, even if Dick himself disagrees. He does it because Tim asks him to.
Is it a mistake? Maybe. Does it make Tim forgive Dick for choosing Damian as his Robin? Definitely not. But it's very clearly not because he doesn't care, not because he's too busy to pay attention to Tim. It's an act of respect, of treating Tim as an equal who is capable of making his own decisions. In that way, it's showing his trust to Tim.
I have an entirely separate post on the subject of why Dick not believing Tim is narratively supported to make later (EDIT: posted here!), so I'm gonna go on a little Tim rant here instead. Because this post isn't long enough.
During this time, Tim is consistently begging for people to believe in him, while also refusing to play all his cards. The picture that started his hunch is never brought up. Frankly, I'm not sure that even if he did show it to everyone that people would believe him, but I think it's telling that he doesn't.
First, I kind of see it as Tim engaging in a "relationship test". They're the kind of thing that only people who are deeply insecure or in a bad place think to do- if I stop talking to all my friends, how long will it take people to notice? Who's going to notice that I'm upset without me saying anything, who really cares about me? If I share an insane theory, who is going to believe me point blank?
They're the kind of thing that is....not healthy in any way, shape, or form, and really aren't fair to the people you're testing. Sure, someone "passing" the test may show that they care for you (and, ultimately, the only person who believes Tim without reservation is Kon, once he comes back- and that unquestioning belief and loyalty is meaningful), but "failing" the test doesn't mean that they don't care. And they're ultimately a sort of self-sabotage, because you know that most people are going to fail because you know the test is unfair.
And that's exactly what it is: self-sabotage. As previously mentioned, Tim is massively self-isolating during this part of the arc, and pushing people away because they "don't believe him" is just one facet of that self-isolation. But he also doesn't try to get them to believe him, doesn't even give them that chance, because his ultimate goal is not to actually get anyone on his side, but to push everyone away. That's not to say that he secretly doesn't want people to believe him, but... he's acting mostly irrationally. He wants people to believe him but won't let them close enough to meaningfully give them the chance to do so.
Second, as much as Tim says that he's positive he's right and he's going to prove it, he's straight up lying, and he's actually not that sure at this point. And he's probably terrified that if he does show his proof, that someone will see it and still not believe him, and he'll have to face the fact that his only piece of evidence is extremely flimsy and that his conviction is based much more on grief than it actually is on logic.
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So. Yeah, no one believes him. And that does suck, and it's a hit to him. But he didn't exactly give them a chance. He's preemptively cutting people out before they have a chance to hurt him or point out where he's wrong.
Tim is still a pitiable character here. He's a disaster and a wet puddle of a man who is living through the worst time in his entire life. But he's not a poor victim, scorned by his family and the world at large, thought to be crazy for no reason at all! Instead, he's (much more interestingly, imo) a kid dealing with his grief incredibly poorly, self-isolating and refusing every outstretched hand, clinging desperately on to his last hope that maybe his world hasn't changed as much as it seems like it has.
Blackest Night
Blackest Night is a huge crossover event that happened during the Red Robin run; technically speaking, you can skip it without missing anything in the plot of Red Robin, but it does have some good moments that highlight Tim's mental state and his relationship with Dick.
So, Tim leaves Gotham, but when Black Lantern Rings start bringing a bunch of people back from the dead in the form of zombies, including Dick and Tim's parents, Dick calls him back to Gotham. And Tim, looking at the decaying zombie corpse of his parents, is also arguing that he can save them.
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When faced with an evil zombie that is trying to kill him, Tim still says "I can still fix this, I can save him". And Dick, as compassionately as ever, tries to talk sense into him. It's the exact same situation as with Bruce, but this time Tim is absolutely wrong.
And with this situation as a parallel, I think it's a lot clearer how unreasonable Tim's mental state is. He might seem like he's just a misunderstood genius in Bruce's case because he happened to be right, but the fact of the matter is, he's not thinking clearly. And he'd cling onto the same hopes even when he's wrong. With Bruce's case, he got lucky.
Also! This panel.
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Even with all of this between them, Tim still answers Dick that he trusts him, with no hesitation. Of course.
Reconciliation
So, does Tim come back to Gotham, replaced and forgotten, and become isolated from the rest of the Bats?
Nope! There is, actually, a reconciliation of sorts between Dick and Tim. Admittedly, there is no scene where Dick outright says he's sorry, and Tim says he forgives him. But in my reading, there are interactions that serve a similar purpose, if you read between the lines.
After Tim finds proof of what's been going on with Batman, had a whole thing with the League and the Council of Spiders, and blown up a bunch of League bases, he returns to Gotham where Ra's is enacting a plan to get revenge for Tim acting against him: destroying Batman's legacy. Everything he loved and everything he built is in the crosshairs.
And when he's trying to figure out what Ra's is planning, he meets back up with Dick.
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Tim is spewing crazy theories, and with absolutely no proof or explanation, he turns to Dick and asks him to trust him. And this time, Dick tells him, Of course. The fraction between them that preceded Tim's departure from Gotham is repeated, and this time Dick tells Tim he trusts him, and asks what he can do to help.
(This time, Dick does call Tim crazy, while he's muttering to himself. And then he chooses to trust him anyway.)
Granted, this is not an actual apology. But it feels like a second chance. One more bid for connection, and this time Dick meets him in the middle and reciprocates.
Anyway, since when do siblings actually verbally say "I'm sorry"?
And then... quick summary, in case you want the real details for the following events:
Ra's sends assassins after all the people Batman cares about to distract Tim from the fact that he's getting Hush (who is impersonating Bruce Wayne) to sign over Wayne Enterprises. But Tim wins because he finally stops self-isolating and gets his many friends to protect everyone who needs protecting while Tim faces off against Ra's. (Which is, ultimately, a climax of his character arc for this story- reaching out and trusting people again. Team up guy back in action!)
Tim's able to keep Ra's busy long enough that Lucius can file the paperwork to make him the majority shareholder of Wayne Enterprises, thwarting Ra's' attempt at a takeover. However, Ra's wins the fight, and Tim ends up plummeting to his death out of the window.
And then Dick catches him.
Later, Dick asks Tim how he could have planned for Dick to be there to save him.
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And Tim says "You're my brother, Dick. You'll always be there for me."
This scene has been talked to death, because most people are at a consensus: this is a fucking lie. Tim didn't know that Dick would be there, and was fully prepared to die.
However! I'm not here to rehash this. I just want to add my take. It's a lie, but. Tim is a good liar. And every good liar knows that the best lies have a grain of truth in them.
I do believe that Tim didn't know that anyone would be there to save him. But I also believe that he fully means what he says here, that it's not just to placate Dick. Tim is telling Dick that he trusts him, that he believes in him, that they're brothers. It's forgiveness.
I could keep citing all the places where Tim shows an unconditional belief in Dick that happen after this arc, to prove that their relationship is truly mended after this and that they don't continue fighting, but that happens often enough that you could just read any comic including Tim and Dick and I'm sure Tim will say some fanboy shit eventually.
So, that's it! If you take nothing else from this post, take this at least: Tim and Dick LOVE each other, and they might fight, but they forgive each other, and if you try to talk shit about Dick Grayson, Tim will be one of the first to fight you, guaranteed. Suffice to say:
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shivunin · 8 months
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Hi, I just wondered what your favourite part of the Fenhawke romance was? Like, a scene/moment that really made you fall more in love with him? I love your writing so much!!
Oh, that is very kind of you to say! 💗I'm glad you enjoy the things I've written. I've really been enjoying writing for this ship, especially the past few months c:
As for your question...
Man, that's tough. I have a hard time picking one thing---I mean, *gestures to all the fic* you know? But I can narrow it down to a couple of scenes/elements:
The fact that a romanced Fenris still calls you "my friend" even after the act 2 romance scene. This is just...the bedrock of their relationship to me. Yes, that night went very poorly (understatement, I know), but at the core they are friends and he trusts Hawke in a way he's likely never had the cause or opportunity to trust someone before. I believe he never stopped loving Hawke, and it was a matter of laying those feelings out and understanding them one at a time. Romantic love not replacing platonic love or eclipsing it, but building or twining together is just... *chef's kiss* that's the good stuff.
The moment during the romance conversation in Act 3 when you can see Fenris go from hoping (painfully hoping!) that there is still some way he and Hawke can be together to actually believing it will happen. There is a shift in his body language that I could watch (and...have) over and over.
The element of choice? This is not going to be coherent, but the fact that he is learning for the first time what it means to have options and preferences, and he spends a lot of time exploring and understanding himself...and after all of that, the thing he keeps coming back to is Hawke. I think it's gorgeous. A song with refrains of pain or fear and choruses of decision and hope. He's loyal to a fault, in many ways, but understanding how much of himself exists to share and then still choosing to share it is just...man. I said this wasn't going to be coherent lol, so there you are. "If there is a future to be had..." like he doubts its existence but he's willing to chance it for Hawke. Man.
But, honestly? I've played DA2 a lot of times and never romanced another character, even though I've played through multiple romance storylines in each of the other games. I can't shake the Fenris romance. Every time I open a new playthrough, I tell myself that this is the time I'm going to romance Isabela, and every time Fenris rips that dude's heart out and I just......alright, yeah. Okay. Here we go again.
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sciderman · 8 months
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Hey sci what are you favorite musicals
to the surprise of no one my favourite musical is probably book of mormon,, i think i just love the genre of musicals that make you belly laugh
youtube
recently i watched the spongebob musical and honestly... has no right to be as good as it is
youtube
underrated genre that are my favourite: showtunes about living in blissful denial. that involve pink sequins.
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brother-emperors · 7 months
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I see your dog-coded Agrippa and Cassius, but what about Crassus ? Kind of like feral dog coded
for me, Crassus skips the dog coding allegations on account of no one being able to put a leash on him, and there's no person he seems to be singularly devoted to in a way that dictates his actions
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Dating The Praetorship of Marcus Licinius Crassus, Martin Stone
like, there's Sulla, but Crassus also did a lot of that of his own accord, and Sulla shut the door on him politically so Crassus climbed in through a window and worked a different aspect of Roman society-politics with magnificent skill. he ALSO skips the dog allegations because if anyone is bringing someone to heel, it's Crassus doing it to other people. there isn't a specific person that Crassus' actions can be dedicated to in a way that makes me think of a dog the way Agrippa's actions for Octavian do.
I also don't think he's feral! what he is: really fucking ruthless, or has the potential for ruthlessness, which isn't the same thing to me as being feral. and being ruthless is not uncommon for Late Republic politics
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Lucullus: A Life, Arthur Keavney
but its that pivot point between being firm, ruthless, and likeable that makes him interesting. he's actually. he's--
okay, so in my mind, he's Machiavelli Prince coded. there are only two Romans I have ever made a compare and contrast analysis using Machiavelli's Il Principe, one is Augustus, the other is Crassus. and for once my connect the dots of thematic tomfoolery has something I can cite, someone ELSE has also made a comparison to Augustus
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Dating The Praetorship of Marcus Licinius Crassus, Martin Stone
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ohhyperbola · 3 days
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mccncutter · 1 year
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It's Munday! ( yes I know its 11pm shush )
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ask-thomassaggs · 7 months
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Hello there. Robert has made it mandatory that all C.O.G.S. Inc. employees have these mandated blogs. Myself included.
While I mostly may be busy working, I may find time to answer any inquires.
Did I forget to water Bubby again...? I could just be worrying too much...
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master-k0hga · 16 days
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| T A K E S H I |
[ Category: The Promised Land ]
| There we go, the old sport himself.... Y'know,,, the guy who runs the organisation to not only get goods sent around the Promised Land and help his family owned business going, but to also keep the peace and all that shit... His family has been best buddies with the Royal family of the Golden Palace after all for generations, so he's in good hands if ever they are swamped with work or are being threatened...!
Takeshi is a pretty stoic kinda guy, takes his work seriously, and definitely takes his relationships of all kinds seriously as well! If anybody goes out of line or breaks his trust, not only will he shut you out; But you'll be exiled, punished and potentially snuffed out... But he's needn't do that since nobody has personally nor professionally stooped that low to him.... Yet
He's a very reliable and trustworthy fellow, and despite how intimidating he looks to many; He's someone who is definitely worthy having in your life.. Hardworking, competent, surprisingly very comforting! He's a saint compared to his family's shady history...!!
.. And he must be a really cool guy, Tammy is dating him and they plan of getting married someday!
☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
INFO
Name: Takeshi Species: Ice Elf (Origin Kind) General Personality: Serious, independent, hardworking, trustworthy, protective, actually very welcoming, quite stubborn, strong Height: 9ft "2" Relationship Status: In a relationship
Extra Info:
Takeshi took over the Frostclaw Traders organisation after his father's passing when he was 18; The organisation was actually something incredibly different before his grandfather took over and completely re-did everything from the ground to what it was known as previously.. Which used to be a cult of sacrifice, blood, greed and all now frowned upon by the newer generations while what had happened prior was approved of by the acenstors of both the Golden Palace and Frostclaw. Takeshi wishes to keep to what the organisation means nowadays; Trades, peace and a very well fed supply of resources all around the Promised Land
Despite being just a mere Ice Elf, Takeshi and his late family were of a "pure breed" which are actually referred to as "Frost Folk", the Ice Elves themselves just seemed to have "dwindled" ever so slightly and "softened" their physical attributes through the years whilst Takeshi himself remained of his origins. The only vital differences is that their skin appears more pale and could potentially glisten like icicles in the sunlight, their eyes pale with sharp white pupils and fanged teeth like vampires (minus the blood sucking). The Origin diet mainly consists of ice and herbal teas as they cannot process meats or heavy foods; Diet practically being mostly of liquid or things that can melt easily on the tongue
He actually wields two blades, and carries a small dagger that was passed down from his mother on his 10th birthday; He never uses the dagger however keeps is as a good luck charm. The dual blades were passed from his father a week before his father's passing years ago
He's 31 years old and appears to have been that age for the past decade; Unknown to this anomaly, he fears something that the indescribable horrors his ancestors has committed have punished him, cursed to become immortal as he watches his loved ones slip away.. Either that or he has lost track of time, thus losing track of his age, not even Tammy knows how old he potentially could be
Usually he and his partner tends to take turns when it comes to business, Tammy deals with the papers, the contracts and phone calls while Takeshi focuses more on the meetings, the agreements and engagements to keep the organisation going at a steady pace; Although it is joked around by his girlfriend that he cannot sit still in a phone call and listen to the other "unintelligible imbecile" on the other side, and also he needs reading glasses so he doesn't accidentally agree to something he "refuses to acknowledge" or "accept"
He's quite stubborn, even though he cannot deny it, his own parents, although had not outright acted on inherently "evil activities" by the standards of their ancestors, but his father specifically had to agree to certain "distasteful procedures" just to keep the Frostclaw Traders alive up to now; Takeshi personally believes his parents, most specifically his father, were saints when they were alive. A part of him is still a child at heart when he's naive about his family and their actions
Takeshi runs and leads the main branch of the Frostclaw Traders organisation within the Glacier Mountains of the Promised Land, which is also the main hometown for the Ice Elves, however that isn't to say he does not have other branches opened out within the realm itself to make his business efficient. Almost every corner within the Promised Land has Frostclaw services, ranging from stock, resources, even a couple small postal services; He has no doubt hired and even promoted most of his members of his business to run and manage the other branches (with helps of the civilizations within the regions). It is also thanks to King Aurelius that Takeshi is able to expand this business thoroughly to keep the realm in well managed conditions
Although not directly, he did have a bad couple of run ins with a few of Kira's henchmen when they tried to infiltrate the hometown of the Ice Elves to steal some valuables and other "secret documents and treasures" for whatever purposes, though being quite the fighter and his defences are, they scared them off successfully without too much lost
Ice Elves bleed a teal blue, however Takeshi being of the Origin era; his is a luminous blue and (believe it or not) has a gold shimmer.. So if you see a pretty luminous blue "paint" with a gold shinmer, that isn't paint that's Frost Folk blood
+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +
But uhm.. Yeah, s'pose that's about it for him- The main guy who runs the business, maintaining it while keeping his people happy, comfortable and safe from the threats of the opposing sides. Although not as directly involved or connected with the threat of the Deceit and their goal, the Frostclaw's alliance is with the Golden Palace, so Takeshi and his people are prone to be harassed or threatened.. Not like that'll stop him from continuing on with his family run business and trying to make this strange realm a safe place to live..
Takeshi, obviously like the others, was also a former Yiga OC of mine before I changed them up entirely! And funnily enough in the BotW era where I had them be part of the Yiga clan, Takeshi originally was gonna be like the next leader after Master Kohga retires and lets him take over before I made them all into their own thing.. Takeshi hasn't really changed personality-wise since he's always been a hardworking and independent person, but leading a business along with those close to him makes it very easy to get the job done, even if he is potentially cursed to become an immortal being who's been punished for his ancestors sick and twisted endeavours.. (Or is his fear of living alone is making him succimb to his paranoia)... But uhm.. Yeah!
Believe I only really have a few former Yiga OCs who are in need of re-purposing entirely before I'm actually done with the basics for them, and then after that I'll have to go back to sorting out my Zareans species and other non related OCs..
Still loads to do but oh well-
. Takeshi, Art © Me . DON’T RE-POST .
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floralovebot · 1 year
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winxers i am asking you hand in intolerable hand please help me i know you listen to music don't pretend !!
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myearts-uwu · 1 year
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Yk I kinda wonder a bit, but do you have any Malaysian artists that you recommend follow for their art? Since I'm like learning to draw again so I kinda wonder if you have any recommendations 👉👈
Ooo, Malaysian artists, huh? See, I know that I have followed several Malaysian artists but I don't really remember any of them ;-;
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nyan-bynary · 1 year
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Not to jinx it by talking about it too early but I might be able to get a visa to visit Canada at some point in this year!!!!
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Another ask for you!
What do you think of Xue Yang? Since you asked me the same thing.
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Xue Yang, Xue Yang, Xue Yang...
He’s one of the people I really like as a character, but really don’t like as a person. I find him so, so interesting throughout the Yi City arc, especially motivation-wise. He seems to be driven by one of the typically villainous motivations at first, that being non-proportionate revenge, but as that arc continues we see that his feelings are changing and that motive becomes like more of a mask to himself – he’s trying to convince himself he’s doing this for revenge, he’s trying to convince himself the only emotion he feels towards Xiao Xingchen is hate, even when there’s clearly more to all that, because it being anything else would completely destroy this idea of himself he’s built up in his head. There’s a really good meta about the motivation behind his actions trying to make Xiao Xingchen a ‘bad’ person, and it’s all so interesting!
Like you said, he has a chance to change, but doesn’t take it when the cards are on the table. I think it’s almost shifting responsibility off himself? Like how he refuses to accept that he’s at fault for Xiao Xingchen’s death, instead blaming everybody else. I feel like he almost thinks “well, I’m a bad person, that’s just who I am and it’s not my fault” and wants that to absolve him of blame.
And the thing is that none of his conflicting motivations and depth make him any better of a person! At the end of the day, he’s still killing and torturing innocent villagers, he’s still making Xiao Xingchen kill unknowingly when finding out would and did drive him to suicide, he’s still the reason that he died, he still killed Song Lan and A-Qing in horrible ways. It plays into the ‘love is an action word’ theme explored by @rynne in the meta I reblogged – he may have these conflicting feelings towards Xiao Xingchen, and I’d argue that some of it was a twisted love, but that does NOT make him a good person and does NOT make their dynamic healthy, because at the end of the day, his actions are what they are. You can’t choose what to feel, but you can choose what to do with that, and what Xue Yang continues to choose because of this mindset and absolution of blame is not the right thing to do at all. And none that means that his life with the Yi City crew would have been happy if Song Lan hadn’t turned up, because making somebody do something completely against their morals without their consent is not okay, whichever way you cut it. He wanted and had a fantasy of living a happy life, but again, his actions didn’t match up to that and were ultimately what caused that fantasy’s downfall. 
And another thing that makes him interesting, from a narrative standpoint, is the thematic parallels are everywhere, especially between him and Wei Wuxian. Like you already said, they had a similar childhood – both grew up poor and on the streets, for example, both went through circumstances that could have made them want to enact revenge, both are very smart and talented. But the thing that separates them is their choices, and that Wei Wuxian chooses to move on and be kind, whereas Xue Yang traps himself and is consumed by his resentment (and chooses that even when feeling other things). I also saw another post a while ago pointing out the parallels between Wei Wuxian being willing to give up a hand for his sect and Xue Yang destroying his clan for his finger, which has stuck with me. There are definitely parallels with other members of the cast if you search for them, but him as a parallel to Wei Wuxian is what sticks out the most.
So yeah, he’s a very interesting character, and I’d agree with you when saying he's probably the most interesting main antagonist. The gap between what he feels and convinces himself he feels and what he does is so interesting to explore, and you don’t really see that with anyone else (...I mean. Of course Shen Qingqiu in SVSSS exists, but that’s a post of it’s own. It is interesting comparing them though, especially since their choices are practically opposites – they both try to convince themselves they don’t care about somebody they clearly do care for, but whereas SQQ always chooses even impulsively to protect LBH, XY does... all that).
As a person, though? Well, that’s self-explanatory. 
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softnasty · 1 year
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have a date tomorrow with a guy who's like ~*my type*~ i guess based on the guys i've been on dates with before/fallen for which is simultaneously great and not great for me lol i'm fairly certain we'll have chemistry irl because not my first rodeo, but also, this type of guy means "not living in the same city/continent as i do" because i sure always manage to get dates with people who are incredibly inconvenient to fall for anyway
maybe i can handle this in a very chill way like i did with W last summer and not get carried away and continue in that vein and maybe this is just a fun summer thing ! we shall see
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leogichidaa · 2 years
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Regulus calling Kreacher his friend is like a dude calling his favorite prostitute his girlfriend. Only worse, because at least that guy is paying the prostitute for her services and she is not magically bound to his will. But sorry, bro, a slave you order to clean your room is not a friend. That ain't friendship. If that elf is your friend, hand him a gd sock and invite him out for a beer. Enslaving your friend is not prosocial behavior.
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grvntld · 2 years
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(ノ*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)ノ*:・゚✧♡ — consider me a dyosa puddle of soft and mushy feels once my furbaby wags his tail and jumps on me for some embrace and kisses
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silasbug · 1 year
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fondly thinking about my best friend.
no idea how she's managed to stick it out with me this far but i'm amazed that after over 6 years she still has enough patience to tolerate me.
when i don't feel like i'm good enough, she reminds me of who i am. when i make mistakes, she doesn't treat me any different. when i'm highly dysphoric, she just /gets/ it and shows me unrelenting support and encouragement. she's my #1 hypeman, and i am hers.
there isn't another person in the world that's been able to make me feel even.. remotely okay in my own skin, about how i look and how a body feels (i would also say about who i am, but i'd be lying).
i realize that i've always had a bit of body dysmorphia and generally don't enjoy looking at my own face because it's.. very uncanny to me. i don't have a proper sense of style. but she always just?? has something nice to say and she does it so genuinely that you can actually believe that she means what she says. because she's the same.
i'll go out looking like a 12 year old boy and she's just. fucking. there for it. she'll cheer for it. do it with me. and then we'll walk around the block looking like two lil' dudebros together because we own the same clothes. and fucking hell.
this girl is too good to me. i absolutely don't deserve her.
sometimes it's hard to believe that someone like her exists.
and that i get to be witness to it.
there's caveats, of course. we talk so rarely (we go weeks without), the interests we share are few and far between and there's.. so many things i could never tell her because i will never get over that fear of losing her.
there is no right moment and there isn't a time and those are things i neither need nor want her to know, because it would change the way she sees me.
and i guess that seems callous and detached and dishonest.
but we are there when it matters. i am there when she needs me and i will always pick up her pieces.
i want her to have a good thing. she sees me as a good thing.
so i'll let her have me this way.
#the one person i've not yet managed to hurt and i don't think i ever fucking will#i'd throw myself off a damn cliff first#this girl just saw me one day when i showed up to school. decided i /seemed/ too cool for school and adopted me over the summer.#like what. how. i am THE lamest guy™ AND SHE somehow STILL thinks i'm cool what a nerd UGH#it's just sad that we're at the point where we have little to tell each other because our lives are so different & we live far apart#at least we can take naps with each other and just chill out when we meet. we can just.. be in the moment together and enjoy it.#and that is still. everything.#also like. i generally don't take selfies but i did a few days ago because i thought i looked kinda cool and i told her about it and#she really wanted to see & she is the only person i'd ever send selfies to and she just...#'bug those last three could work as a hot fuckboy tinder profile' LOL bless her that's the funniest shit i've ever heard#IDK IT'S that thing where you love and care so much for someone that they become infiniely more attractive than they are at first glance?#but she's the only person that i'd ever actually be able to believe. because she is so fucking genuine.#i'll also never get over the fact that she is the smartest and most studious person i know but listens to the most anti social german rap#like LMAO okay girl! you go! i hate it but i love you#it's just a funny contrast that she listens to the filthiest shit imaginable hahaha#personal
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