#idk I just feel too long too short too unbaalanced

[cherrysnax]

it’s probably just the depressions and the dissociative disorders but I often feel like I’m just possessing my own dead body

#i feel wrong. fake. gone. in a way that I can never explain #i few twisted like im watching someone just. wither away and I want to help them but it’s me #everything feels so heavy and so weird #and idk it’s like the small things #my lips seem to move different my eyes seems slightly too far apart #my reflection takes too long to change #just a second too long #am I losing my fucking mind #n of course this isn’t helped by the misfit toys #hm. that’s very specific wording that I personally don’t use #I’m not gonna dwell on it too much but I see u #either way #idk I just feel too long too short too unbaalanced #it may be the drink. I feel so much resentment for so many people rn it’s insane but but but the stuff I use to help w my bpd rlly works #just cause I feel like ass at one moment doesn’t my feelings r right n even if people constant treat me like SHIT it doesn’t actually mean #they treat me like shit I just perceive it #at least Chevys back home for another day. so many of those thoughts go away when they’re around #I just wish my brain knew it wasn’t like. always go time I want to be able to relax fr #esp since my ass does NOTHING IM JUST A SACK of shit or something idk #it’s 2am I have to be up at 8 lmaooo i fuckin hate it here. I’ve gathered that I’m just depressed and nothing is actually wrong #well I mean there is. I’m very mentally ill and am constantly surrounded by stressors so I’ll never really be able to heal until I leave #but besides that things r pretty okay :’) I will be okay #I thought abt my butch once and now I’m 60% less breakdowny I love lesbianism