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flightfoot · 4 years

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Analyzing Reyna’s romance (or rather, lack thereof) arc and her feelings towards it throughout the series

Recently, Rick published a tweet about Reyna’s orientation, stating “Personally, I see her as romantic asexual and have written her arc with that in mind. (hence the prophecy in HoO) It’s been a struggle for her to figure that out, as she explains in Tyrant’s Tomb. But as always, interpret the text as you wish.”

After reading Tyrant’s Tomb, I figured she was somewhere around ace or aro, so it was cool to see it confirmed that he wrote her with that in mind! Especially since I’m ace myself, and we don’t get a ton of representation. It was just really neat.

In light of that, I wanted to lay out and analyze her arc as it relates to her orientation, to who she’s attracted (or moreso, not attracted) to, starting from her first appearance and continuing through to Tyrant’s Tomb.

Starting all the way from “Son of Neptune”, there’s hints and conversations about Reyna’s love life woven in, with Percy noticing how Reyna reacts to Jason being mentioned.

Reyna grimaced. Percy got the feeling this guy Jason might’ve been more to her than just a colleague. (SON 41)

Percy doesn’t know much of anything about Jason or Reyna or the culture in Camp Jupiter, so he doesn’t have much of a bias towards thinking they’re a couple because of those factors. For Percy to still pick up on Reyna being especially close to Jason is a pretty good indicator that that wasn’t just other people reading into it, seeing what they expect to see from Reyna - something which DOES happen a lot, and that Reyna goes into in Tyrant’s Tomb.

Jason… Percy couldn’t go very far in this camp without hearing that name.

“The way you talk about him…” Percy said. “Were you two a couple?”

Reyna’s eyes bored into him – like the eyes of a hungry wolf. Percy had seen enough hungry wolves to know.

“We might have been,” Reyna said, “given time. Praetors work closely together. It’s common for them to become romantically involved. But Jason was only praetor for a few months before he disappeared. Ever since then, Octavian has been pestering me, agitating for new elections. I’ve resisted. I’ve resisted. I need a new partner in power – but I prefer someone like Jason. A warrior, not a schemer.”

She waited. Percy realized she was sending him a silent invitation.

His mouth went dry. “Oh… you mean… oh.”

“I believe the gods sent you to help me,” Reyna said. “I don’t understand where you come from, any more than I understood it four years ago. But I think your arrival is some form of repayment. You destroyed my home once. Now you’ve been sent to save my home. I don’t hold a grudge against you for the past, Percy. My sister hates you still, it’s true, but Fate brought me here to Camp Jupiter. I’ve done well. All I ask is that you work with me for the future. I intend to save this camp. (SON 181)

Initially when she’s introduced, and in the early books especially, Reyna gives off this extremely dangerous vibe, with Percy especially being nervous about her. Her initial proposition here seems very opportunistic at first, with the emphasis being on the power that comes from being her partner first and foremost, and any more romantic (or otherwise) partnership being implied as an add-on. It isn’t really clear whether she has any actual feelings for him or not.

“The point is, Percy, you are the real power on this quest. You are a seasoned veteran. I’ve seen what you can do. A son of Neptune wouldn’t be my first choice, but if you return successfully from this mission, the legion might be saved. The praetorship will be yours for the taking. Together, you and I could expand the power of Rome. We could raise an army and find the Doors of Death, crush Gaea’s forces once and for all. You would find me a very helpful… friend.”

She said that word like it could have several meanings, and he could pick which one.

Percy’s feet started tapping on the floor, anxious to run. “Reyna… I’m honored, and all. Seriously. But I’ve got a girlfriend. And I don’t want power, or a praetorship.”

Percy was afraid he’d made her mad. Instead she just raised her eyebrows.

“A man who turns down power?” she said. “That’s not very Roman of you. Just think about it. In four days, I have to make a choice. If we are to fight off an invasion, we must have two strong praetors. I’d prefer you, but if you fail on your quest, or don’t come back, or refuse my offer… Well, I’ll work with Octavian. I mean to save this camp, Percy Jackson. Things are worse than you realize.” (SON 182-183)

Reyna’s giving off a “together we can rule” kind of vibe, though for benevolent purposes. And the emphasis on him not being her first choice necessarily but preferring him to other options, along with the casual way she talks about him possibly failing his quest or not making it back compounds the perception that this isn’t really about Percy personally, and not about any attraction she may or may not have towards him, but just what he can offer as far as strengthening the camp goes.

He could tell the audience was over. Reyna was having trouble holding herself together, keeping up the image of the confident commander. She needed some time by herself.

But at the door of the principia, Percy couldn’t resist turning. “How did we destroy your home – that spa where you lived?”

The metal greyhounds growled. Reyna snapped her fingers to silence them.

“You destroyed the power of our mistress,” she said. “You freed some prisoners who took revenge on all of us who lived on the island. My sister and I… well, we survived. It was difficult. But in the long run, I think we are better off away from that place.”

“Still, I’m sorry,” Percy said. “If I hurt you, I’m sorry.”

Reyna gazed at him for a long time, as if trying to translate his words. “An apology? Not very Roman at all, Percy Jackson. You’d make an interesting praetor. I hope you’ll think about my offer.” (SON 184-185)

The bit about Reyna having trouble holding herself together and keeping up this image shows a crack in her earlier portrayal, that maybe she isn’t quite as... impassive I think? As she appears while making her ‘offer’ to Percy. It does make me wonder though, how much of this portrayal of her during this scene was a deliberately planned part of her character arc since the beginning, and how much was Rick writing this in the early stages and slowly figuring out her character along the way. In later scenes, especially in later books, it seemed like less of a purely pragmatic offer, and more of one with at least some twinges of actual desire behind it, albeit only twinges (not like she knows Percy that well anyway).

She glanced up at the warship. Her expression turned a little wistful. “You say Jason is aboard… I hope that’s true. I’ve missed him.” (SON 512)

Even here, though, at the end of SON, the stalwart commander image she tries to project softens a little, and her closeness with Jason, her desire to see him again, is emphasized. Platonic or romantic, she definitely cares for him.

“Enough,” Reyna snapped. “Annabeth is what she says. She’s here in peace. Besides…” She gave Annabeth a look of grudging respect. “Percy has spoken highly of you.”

The undertones in Reyna’s voice took Annabeth a moment to decipher. Percy looked down, suddenly interested in his cheeseburger.

Annabeth’s face felt hot. Oh gods… Reyna had tried to make a move on Percy. That explained the tinge of bitterness, maybe even envy in her words. Percy had turned her down for Annabeth. (MOA 24)

Here’s where there starts being some pretty strong implications that Reyna did actually care about Percy more personally, her romantic offer was for more than just convenience sake. Especially with the ‘maybe even envy’ part. The bitterness could just as easily be from just the rejection, but the envy implies she actively wants what Annabeth has.

“Uh, Reyna,” Jason said. “if you don’t mind, I’d like to show Piper around before the senate meeting. She’s never seen New Rome.”

Reyna’s expression hardened.

Annabeth wondered how Jason could be so dense. Was it possible he really didn’t understand how much Reyna liked him? It was obvious enough to Annabeth. Asking to show his new girlfriend around Reyna’s city was rubbing salt in a wound.

“Of course,” Reyna said coldly.

Percy took Annabeth’s hand. “Yeah, me too, I’d like to show Annabeth-“

“No,” Reyna snapped.

Percy knit his eyebrows. “Sorry?”

“I’d like a few words with Annabeth,” Reyna said. “Alone. If you don’t mind, my fellow praetor.”

Her tone made it clear she wasn’t really asking permission.

The chill spread down Annabeth’s back. She wondered what Reyna was up to. Maybe the praetor didn’t like the idea of two guys who had rejected her giving their girlfriends tours of her city. Or maybe there was something she wanted to say in private. Either way, Annabeth was reluctant to be alone and unarmed with the Roman leader. (MOA 32)

Reyna did have some things she wanted to go over with Annabeth privately, but with the emphasis on Annabeth being able to tell how much Reyna likes Jason, her reacting coldly to him asking to take Piper around the city, along with the way she snapped at Percy for asking to take Annabeth around instead of stating her refusal more calmly, her reactions strongly suggest that she IS hurting from seeing both Percy and Jason with their girlfriends, that she does have feelings for them somewhat, and is trying to suppress it.

“Long story,” Reyna said. “But I remember you well. You were brave. I’d never seen anyone refuse Circe’s hospitality, much less outwit her. It’s no wonder Percy cares for you.”

Her voice was wistful. Annabeth thought it might be safer not to respond. (MOA 37-38)

I didn’t pull quotations emphasizing this specifically, but Reyna’s loneliness and the strain she’s under as a commander, especially having been the lone praetor for so long, is putting her under a lot of stress. I think at least part of the reason for her hints of envy towards Annabeth and coldness about Jason having a girlfriend, is derived from her not really having had the sort of support that Percy and Jason currently have, that intimacy, that ability to drop the walls and image she’s built up in order to lead and to protect herself.

“I wanted to hear it from you,” Reyna said.

Annabeth turned. “Hear what from me?”

“The truth,” Reyna said. “Convince me I’m not making a mistake by trusting you. Tell me about yourself. Tell me about Camp Half-Blood. Your friend Piper has sorcery in her words. I spent enough time with Circe to know charmspeak when I hear it. I can’t trust what she says. And Jason… well, he has changed. He seems distant, no longer quite Roman.”

The hurt in her voice was as sharp as broken glass. Annabeth wondered if she had sounded that way, all the months she’d been searching for Percy. At least she’d found her boyfriend. Reyna had no one. She was responsible for running an entire camp all by herself. Annabeth could sense that Reyna wanted Jason to love her. But he had disappeared, only to come back with a new girlfriend. Meanwhile, Percy had risen to praetor, but he had rebuffed Reyna too. Now Annabeth had come to take him away. Reyna would be left alone again, shouldering a job meant for two people.

When Annabeth had arrived at Camp Jupiter, she’d been prepared to negotiate with Reyna or even fight her if needed. She hadn’t been prepared to feel sorry for her.

She kept that feeling hidden. Reyna didn’t strike her as someone who would appreciate pity. (MOA 38-39)

The loneliness is really apparent here, and very explicit. I don’t think it’s even really about ‘romantic love’, as far as the whole thing with Jason goes, exactly, but... being that high level of priority. Having someone there for you closely. I think she at least thinks that a romantic relationship with Jason, or even Percy, may provide that. And that’s something most people need, regardless of orientation.

“You see?” Reyna said bitterly. “The spear is thrown. Our people are at war.”

“Not if I succeed,” Annabeth said.

Reyna’s expression looked the same as it had at Camp Jupiter when she realized Jason had found another girl. The praetor was too alone, too bitter and betrayed to believe anything could go right for her ever again. Annabeth waited for her to attack. (MOA 253)

Between this sudden attack out of nowhere, Jason disappearing and returning with having bonded with these new people, especially Piper, and having ‘changed’ as she said, no longer having anyone around she’s close to... well. She’s just managing as best she can.

In the center of the line stood Reyna, her metal dogs Aurum and Argentum at her side. Upon seeing her, Jason felt an incredible pang of guilt. He’d let her believe they had a future together. He had never been in love with her, and he hadn’t led her on exactly… but he also hadn’t shut her down.

He’d disappeared, leaving her to run the camp on her own. (Okay, that hadn’t exactly been Jason’s idea, but still…) Then he had returned to Camp Jupiter with his new girlfriend Piper and a whole bunch of Greek friends in a warship. They’d fired on the Forum and run away, leaving Reyna with a war on her hands. (HOH 247)

I couldn’t find much about Reyna’s relationships with others in HOH since she’s barely in the book. From the looks of things, he’d at least believed that Reyna wanted to be with him actively long-term, something which jives pretty well with previous passages concerning Reyna’s relationship with Jason. Makes me curious how exactly they interacted in the past, what went down between them.

Also more emphasis on Reyna being stressed and on her own. That seems to be pretty heavily associated with anything talking about her love life.

So far in the ancient lands, she’d only seen one place on her wish list: Diocletian’s Palace in Split, and even that visit had hardly gone the way she’d imagined. Reyna used to dream about going there with Jason to admire their favorite emperor’s home. She pictured romantic walks with him through the old city, sunset picnics on the parapets. (BOO 75)

And then comes Blood of Olympus, where we actually get to see Reyna’s perspective, her thoughts, instead of having to infer them from other characters’ perceptions of her. The daydreaming about going on trips with him and explicitly ‘romantic’ walks and picnics seems like she genuinely desired that to some extent. Though I do notice those are pretty cliche desires, so that may also feed into the part of her arc with feeling pressured to perform a certain way, to ‘be’ a certain way, and believing that this is how to find happiness.

She found Thalia’s eyes distracting: electric blue, intense, and alert, so much like Jason’s. (BOO 221)

Just wanted to note this bit, since she’s paying special attention to Thalia here, especially her eyes. Though I’m iffy about this representing attraction to Reyna, since Thalia’s eyes are often commented on (at least in their heads) and a major factor in paying attention to them seems to have to do with them being like Jason’s, which could account for the focus.

The giant’s eyes clicked and dilated. Red laser dots floated across Reyna’s breastplate. “Ah, the young praetor. I admit, I’ve been curious. Before I slay you, perhaps you’ll enlighten me. Why would a child of Rome go to such lengths to help the Greeks? You have forfeited your rank, abandoned your legion, made yourself an outlaw – and for what? Jason Grace scorned you. Percy Jackson refused you. Haven’t you been… what’s the word… dumped enough?”

Reyna’s ears buzzed. She recalled Aphrodite’s warning, two years ago in Charleston: You will not find love where you wish or where you hope. No demigod shall heal your heart.

She forced herself to meet the giant’s gaze. “I don’t define myself by the boys who may or may not like me.” (BOO 238)

It just occurred to me that I really have no clue how Orion knows about Reyna’s love life. Like I know Python can provide some intel, but was that detail REALLY that important?

Anyway, this statement by Reyna, “I don’t define myself by the boys who may or may not like me.”, is an important step in how she relates to romance in general, and in her portrayal in the series, particularly in the Tyrant’s Tomb. Before this a lot of emphasis was placed on her being rejected by Percy and Jason, and of at least somewhat wanting to be with them in some capacity, or at least believing that she did. After this she seems more at peace with herself and less focused on past or present pursuit of relationships for herself.

“Once in Charleston, Venus told me something. She said: You will not find love where you wish or where you hope. No demigod shall heal your heart. I- I have struggled with that for…” Her words broke. (BOO 492)

Near the end of BOO, she finally talks to someone about this. A lot of people know, but... well, with the emphasis on how alone she is, how she has to keep up appearances, it doesn’t seem like she’s really gotten a chance to break down and talk to someone. I’m glad she got to do it with Piper. And this proclamation, this prophecy, the seeming hopelessness of it that appears to re-emphasize her being alone, along with implying that she’s broken in some way with the reference to her needing to be ‘healed’... I can only imagine how it would torment her.

Reyna rolled her eyes. “If I had a denarius for every time I got that question… Aside from the fact that Thalia is in the Hunters, and thus sworn to celibacy… why does a strong friendship always have to progress to romance? Thalia’s an excellent friend. Why would I risk messing that up?” (TTT 228)

By TTT she’s had a lot more time to come to terms with her thoughts and feelings about relationships and romance, plus she’s not alone anymore, though the situation is still dire and stressful. While during HOO her being without support and having to manage everything by herself was interwoven with the narrative about her feelings towards Jason and Percy and her lack of romantic relationships, that’s not present here. In fact, it’s the opposite, with her having a strong friendship and having no desire to turn it into something romantic. It seems like those concepts became unbundled, with her having strong support and friendship unrelated to any romance.

Reyna broke a dry branch off a shrub and flicked it into the underbrush. “I went on that quest with Jason, what, two years ago? Venus took one look at me and decided… I don’t know. I was broken. I needed romantic healing. Whatever. I wasn’t back at camp a full day before the whispering started. Nobody would admit that they knew, but they knew. The looks I got: Oh, poor Reyna. The innocent suggestions I got about who I should date.”

She didn’t sound angry. It was more like weighed down and weary. I remembered Frank Zhang’s concern about how long Reyna had shouldered the burdens of leadership, how he wished he could do more to relieve her. Apparently, a lot of legionnaires wanted to help Reyna. Not all of that had been welcome or useful.

“The thing is,” she continued, “I’m not broken.”

“Of course not.” (TTT 233)

This conception about “being broken” is something aces tend to end up feeling, at least without knowing more about asexuality. I didn’t get it as much since I wasn’t surrounded with as much emphasis on dating and sex as a lot of other people are, so I started figuring out maybe I was different from most other people only awhile after having run across the term; I just figured it was normal to have this attraction thing start up sometime later, like late teens or so, and that I didn’t exactly know what people were talking about anyway so maybe I just didn’t recognize it. By the time I figured out that I probably wasn’t going to develop this “sexual attraction” thing anytime soon I already knew about different sexualities and was able to research the topic to see what best description best fit my own experience. So I’m glad Rick touched on Reyna’s discomfort here. With some of the earlier passages I think she may have come to view herself the same way other people were viewing her, as needing a romantic partner to help her, but now she’s realized that was never really necessary for her; she doesn’t need that in her life.

After this, the whole scene with Lester awkwardly asking Reyna out occurs, and she figures out how ridiculous all this stress over who she should be with is, that it’s not something she needs to force herself to do, to dedicate all this time and energy too.

“My whole life, I’ve been living with other people’s expectations of what I’m supposed to be. Be this. Be that. You know?”

[…]

“But the whole time I’ve been a leader here,” she forged on, “I was looking for a partner. Praetors often partner up. In power. But also romantically, I mean. I thought Jason. Then for a hot minute, Percy Jackson. Gods help me, I even considered Octavian.” She shuddered. “Everybody was always trying to ship me with somebody. Thalia. Jason. Gwen. Even Frank. Oh, you’d be perfect together! That’s who you need! But I was never really sure if I wanted that, or if I just felt like I was supposed to want it. People, well-meaning, would be like, Oh, you poor thing. You deserve somebody in your life. Date him. Date her. Date whoever. Find your soulmate.”

She looked to me to see if I was following. Her words came out hot and fast, as if she’d been holding them in for a long time. “And that meeting with Venus. That really messed me up. No demigod will heal your heart. What was that supposed to mean? Then finally, you came along.”

“Do we have to review that part again? I am quite embarrassed enough.”

“But you showed me. When you proposed dating…”

She took a deep breath, her body shaking with silent giggles. “Oh, gods. I saw how ridiculous I’d been. How ridiculous the whole situation was. That’s what healed my heart – being able to laugh at myself again, at my stupid ideas about destiny. That allowed me to break free – just like Frank broke free of his firewood. I don’t need another person to heal my heart. I don’t need a partner… at least, not until and unless I’m ready on my own terms. I don’t need to be force-shipped with anyone or wear anyone else’s label. For the first time in a long time, I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. So thank you.” (TTT 405-406)

I understand her confusion here about whether she herself wanted to be with someone, or whether she felt like she should enough that she forced some facsimile of those feelings onto herself. I suspect that there were at least twinges of genuine romantic feelings concerning Jason at least - a lot of the focus around romance is in regards to him, and some of her reactions regarding him appeared to be more instinctual to me, like her reaction to him suggesting showing Piper around the city. Now how strong those feelings really were and whether they’d sync up well with a romantic relationship, I’m not sure. Just because you can imagine a relationship being one way, actually experiencing it you may find it’s not for you, that conceptually it’s appealing but not when actually trying to have one.

She doesn’t seem entirely sure of her own feelings as far as dating someone goes either, but she’s letting go of the idea, of the feeling that she needs to figure it out now. She can just... be.

When I was first trying to figure out what the heck my orientation was, I fretted about it for a bit, trying to analyze my own feelings and compulsions. I thought demisexual or asexual, and as for my romantic orientation... bi perhaps?

Eventually I just... stopped worrying over it. At least all that much. Pretty sure I’m ace, but romantic orientation I’m still unsure of, though I’m currently leaning aro. And even in my twenties, I’m not totally clear on it. And I don’t have to be. Neither does Reyna. If she ends up with feelings for someone, of whatever gender, that’s fine. If she doesn’t, that’s fine too. Maybe she’ll end up changing what she thinks of herself, what she believes her orientation is as she has more experiences. Or maybe she won’t. It’s good either way.

Joining the Hunters decoupled the themes of loneliness, of isolation from HOO with the idea of romantic relationships even more thoroughly. She has that sort of camaraderie with them. She doesn’t need to be strong for them, to be the high leader. She has that support, along with not needing to be responsible for so many people’s welfare and morale anymore, all without any romantic pressure. She can just chill. There’s a reason she regards it as a vacation. And seriously, good for her!

Side note: based on the focus Reyna has on male characters as possibly being viable partners while not seeming to consider any female characters in the same light, even listing Jason, Percy, and Octavian (though I kinda doubt that was romantic) as ones she considered, but listing Thalia, Jason, Gwen, and Frank as people she was shipped with, I suspect that she’s hetero-leaning. It’s hardly conclusive evidence though, headcanon what you like.

#reyna avila ramirez arellano #reyna ramirez arellano #trials of apollo #heroes of olympus #toa #hoo #asexuality #analysis #my analysis

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aaronmaurer · 3 years

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TV I Liked in 2020

Every year I reflect on the pop culture I enjoyed and put it in some sort of order.

Was there ever a year more unpredictably tailor-made for peak TV than 2020? Lockdowns/quarantines/stay-at-home orders meant a lot more time at home and the occasion to check out new and old favorites. (I recognize that if you’re lucky enough to have kids or roommates or a S.O., your amount of actual downtime may have been wildly different). While the pandemic resulted in production delays and truncated seasons for many shows, the continued streaming-era trends of limited series and 8-13 episode seasons mean that a lot of great and satisfying storytelling still made its way to the screen. As always, I in no way lay any claims to “best-ness” or completeness – this is just a list of the shows that brought me the most joy and escapism in a tough year and therefore might be worth putting on your radar.

10 Favorites

10. The Right Stuff: Season 1 (Disney+)

As a space program enthusiast, even I had to wonder, does the world really need another retelling of NASA’s early days? Especially since Tom Wolfe’s book has already been adapted as the riveting and iconoclastic Philip Kaufman film of the same name? While some may disagree, I find that this Disney+ series does justify its existence by focusing more on the relationships of the astronauts and their personal lives than the technical science (which may be partially attributable to budget limitations?). The series is kind of like Mad Men but with NASA instead of advertising (and real people, of course), so if that sounds intriguing, I encourage you to give it a whirl.

9. Fargo: Season 4 (FX)

As a big fan of Noah Hawley’s Coen Brothers pastiche/crime anthology series, I was somewhat let down by this latest season. Drawing its influence primarily from the likes of gangster drama Miller’s Crossing – one of the Coens’ least comedic/idiosyncratic efforts – this season is more straightforward than its predecessors and includes a lot of characters and plot-threads that never quite cohere. That said, it is still amongst the year’s most ambitious television with another stacked cast, and the (more-or-less) standalone episode “East/West” is enough to make the season worthwhile.

8. The Last Dance (ESPN)

Ostensibly a 10-episode documentary about the 1990s Chicago Bulls’ sixth and final NBA Championship run, The Last Dance actually broadens that scope to survey the entire history of Michael Jordan and coach Phil Jackson’s careers with the team. Cleverly structured with twin narratives that chart that final season as well as an earlier timeframe, each episode also shifts the spotlight to a different person, which provides focus and variety throughout the series. And frankly, it’s also just an incredible ride to relive the Jordan era and bask in his immeasurable talent and charisma – while also getting a snapshot of his outsized ego and vices (though he had sign-off on everything, so it’s not exactly a warts-and-all telling).

7. The Queen’s Gambit (Netflix)

This miniseries adaptation of the Walter Tevis coming-of-age novel about a chess prodigy and her various addictions is compulsively watchable and avoids the bloat of many other streaming series (both in running time and number of episodes). The 1960s production design is stunning and the performances, including Anya Taylor-Joy in the lead role, are convincing and compelling.

6. The Great: Season 1 (hulu)

Much like his screenplay for The Favourite, Tony McNamara’s series about Catherine the Great rewrites history with a thoroughly modern and irreverent sensibility (see also: Sofia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette). Elle Fanning brings a winning charm and strength to the title role and Nicholas Hoult is riotously entertaining as her absurdly clueless and ribald husband, Emperor Peter III. Its 10-episodes occasionally tilt into repetitiveness, but when the ride is this fun, why complain? Huzzah!

5. Dispatches From Elsewhere (AMC)

A limited (but possibly anthology-to-be?) series from creator/writer/director/actor Jason Segal, Dispatches From Elsewhere is a beautiful and creative affirmation of life and celebration of humanity. The first 9 episodes form a fulfilling and complete arc, while the tenth branches into fourth wall-breaking meta territory, which may be a bridge too far for some (but is certainly ambitious if nothing else). Either way, it’s a movingly realized portrait of honesty, vulnerability and empathy, and I highly recommend visiting whenever it inevitably makes its way to Netflix, or elsewhere…

4. What We Do in the Shadows: Season 2 (FX)

The second season of WWDITS is more self-assured and expansive than the first, extending a premise I loved from its antecedent film – but was skeptical could be sustained – to new and reinvigorated (after)life. Each episode packs plenty of laughs, but for my money, there is no better encapsulation of the series’ potential and Matt Berry’s comic genius than “On The Run,” which guest-stars Mark Hamill and features Laszlo’s alter ego Jackie Daytona, regular human bartender.

3. Ted Lasso: Season 1 (AppleTV+)

Much more than your average fish-out-of-water comedy, Jason Sudeikis’ Ted Lasso is a brilliant tribute to humaneness, decency, emotional intelligence and good coaching – not just on the field. The fact that its backdrop is English Premier League Soccer is just gravy (even if that’s not necessarily represented 100% proficiently). A true surprise and gem of the year.

2. Mrs. America (hulu)

This FX miniseries explores the women’s liberation movement and fight for the Equal Rights Amendment in the 1970s and its opposition by conservative women including Phyllis Schlafly. One of the most ingenious aspects of the series is centering each episode on a different character, which rotates the point of view and helps things from getting same-y. With a slate of directors including Ryan Bowden and Anna Fleck (Half-Nelson, Sugar, Captain Marvel) and an A-List cast including Cate Blanchett, Rose Byrne, Uzo Aduba, Sarah Paulson, Margo Martindale, Tracey Ulman and Elizabeth Banks, its quality is right up there with anything on the big screen. And its message remains (sadly) relevant as ever in our current era.

1. The Good Place: Season 4 (NBC)

It was tempting to omit The Good Place this year or shunt it to a side category since only the final 4 episodes aired in 2020, but that would have been disingenuous. This show is one of my all-time favorites and it ended perfectly. The series finale is a representative mix of absurdist humor and tear-jerking emotion, built on themes of morality, self-improvement, community and humanity. (And this last run of eps also includes a pretty fantastic Timothy Olyphant/Justified quasi-crossover.) Now that the entire series is available to stream on Netflix (or purchase in a nice Blu-ray set), it’s a perfect time to revisit the Good Place, or check it out for the first time if you’ve never had the pleasure.

5 of the Best Things I Caught Up With

Anne With An E (Netflix/CBC)

Another example of classic literature I had no prior knowledge of (see also Little Women and Emma), this Netflix/CBC adaptation of Anne of Green Gables was strongly recommended by several friends so I finally gave it a shot. While this is apparently slightly more grown-up than the source material, it’s not overly grimdark or self-serious but rather humane and heartfelt, expanding the story’s scope to include Black and First Nations peoples in early 1800s Canada, among other identities and themes. It has sadly been canceled, but the three seasons that exist are heart-warming and life-affirming storytelling. Fingers crossed that someday we’ll be gifted with a follow-up movie or two to tie up some of the dangling threads.

Better Call Saul (AMC)

I liked Breaking Bad, but I didn’t have much interest in an extended “Breaking Bad Universe,” as much as I appreciate star Bob Odenkirk’s multitalents. Multiple recommendations and lockdown finally provided me the opportunity to catch up on this prequel series and I’m glad I did. Just as expertly plotted and acted as its predecessor, the series follows Jimmy McGill/Saul Goodman on his own journey to disrepute but really makes it hard not to root for his redemption (even as you know that’s not where this story ends).

Joe Pera Talks With You (Adult Swim)

It’s hard to really describe the deadpan and oddly soothing humor of comedian Joe Pera whose persona, in the series at least, combines something like the earnestness of Mr. Rogers with the calm enthusiasm of Bob Ross. Sharing his knowledge on the likes of how to get the best bite out of your breakfast combo, growing a bean arch and this amazing song “Baba O’Reilly” by the Who – have you heard it?!? – Pera provides arch comfort that remains solidly on the side of sincerity. The surprise special he released during lockdown, “Relaxing Old Footage with Joe Pera,” was a true gift in the middle of a strange and isolated year.

The Mandalorian (Disney+)

One of the few recent Star Wars properties that lives up to its potential, the adventures of Mando and Grogu is a real thrill-ride of a series with outstanding production values (you definitely want to check out the behind-the-scenes documentary series if you haven’t). I personally prefer the first season, appreciating its Western-influenced vibes and somewhat-more-siloed story. The back half of the second season veers a little too much into fan service and video game-y plotting IMHO but still has several excellent episodes on offer, especially the Timothy Olyphant-infused energy of premiere “The Marshall” and stunning cinematography of “The Jedi.” And, you know, Grogu.

The Tick (Amazon Prime)

I’ve been a fan of the Tick since the character’s Fox cartoon and indie comic book days and also loved the short-lived Patrick Warburton series from 2001. I was skeptical about this Amazon Prime reboot, especially upon seeing the pilot episode’s off-putting costumes. Finally gaining access to Prime this year, I decided to catch up and it gets quite good!, especially in Season 2. First, the costumes are upgraded; second, Peter Serafinowicz’s initially shaky characterization improves; and third, it begins to come into its own identity. The only real issue is yet another premature cancellation for the property, meaning Season 2’s tease of interdimensional alien Thrakkorzog will never be fulfilled. 😢

Bonus! 5 More Honorable Mentions:

City So Real (National Geographic)

The Good Lord Bird (Showtime)

How To with John Wilson: Season 1 (HBO)

Kidding: Season 2 (Showtime)

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy Vs The Reverend (Netflix)

#tv #television

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path-of-my-childhood · 4 years

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Billboard Woman of the Decade Taylor Swift: 'I Do Want My Music to Live On'

By: Jason Lipshutz for Billboard Magazine Date: December 14th issue

In the 2010s, she went from country superstar to pop titan and broke records with chart-topping albums and blockbuster tours. Now Swift is using her industry clout to fight for artists’ rights and foster the musical community she wished she had coming up.

One evening in late October, before she performed at a benefit concert at the Hollywood Bowl in Los Angeles, Taylor Swift’s dressing room became - as it often does - an impromptu summit of music’s biggest names. Swift was there to take part in the American Cancer Society’s annual We Can Survive concert alongside Billie Eilish, Lizzo, Camila Cabello and others, and a few of the artists on the lineup came by to visit.

Eilish, along with her mother and her brother/collaborator, Finneas O’Connell, popped in to say hello - the first time she and Swift had met. Later, Swift joined the exclusive club of people who have seen Marshmello without his signature helmet when the EDM star and his manager stopped by.

“Two dudes walked in - I didn’t know which one was him,” recalls Swift a few weeks later, sitting on a lounge chair in the backyard of a private Beverly Hills residence following a photo shoot. Her momentary confusion turned into a pang of envy. “It’s really smart! Because he’s got a life, and he can get a house that doesn’t have to have a paparazzi-proof entrance.” She stops to adjust her gray sweatshirt dress and lets out a clipped laugh.

Swift, who will celebrate her 30th birthday on Dec. 13, has been impossibly famous for nearly half of her lifetime. She was 16 when she released her self-titled debut album in 2006, and 20 when her second album, Fearless, won the Grammy Award for album of the year in 2010, making her the youngest artist to ever receive the honor. As the decade comes to a close, Swift is one of the most accomplished musical acts of all time: 37.3 million albums sold, according to Nielsen Music; 95 entries on the Billboard Hot 100 (including five No. 1s); 23 Billboard Music Awards; 12 Country Music Association Awards; 10 Grammys; and five world tours.

She also finishes the decade in a totally different realm of the music world from where she started. Swift’s crossover from country to pop - hinted at on 2012’s Red and fully embraced on 2014’s 1989 - reflected a mainstream era in which genres were blended with little abandon, where artists with roots in country, folk and trap music could join forces without anyone raising eyebrows. (See: Swift’s top 20 hit “End Game,” from 2017’s reputation, which featured Ed Sheeran and Future.)

Swift’s new album, Lover, released in August, is both a warm break from the darkness of reputation - which was created during a wave of negative press generated by Swift’s public clash with Kanye West and Kim Kardashian-West - as well as an amalgam of all her stylistic explorations through the years, from dreamy synth-pop to hushed country. “The skies were opening up in my life,” says Swift of the album, which garnered three Grammy nominations, including song of the year for the title track.

She recorded Lover after the Reputation Stadium Tour broke the record for the highest-grossing U.S. tour late last year. In 2020, Swift will embark on Lover Fest, a run of stadium dates that will feature a hand-picked lineup of artists (as yet unannounced) and allow Swift more time off from the road. “This is a year where I have to be there for my family - there’s a lot of question marks throughout the next year, so I wanted to make sure that I could go home,” says Swift, likely referencing her mother’s cancer diagnosis, which inspired the Lover heart-wrencher “Soon You’ll Get Better.”

Now, however, Swift finds herself in a different highly publicized dispute. This time it’s with Scott Borchetta, the head of her former label, Big Machine Records, and Scooter Braun, the manager-mogul whose Ithaca Holdings acquired Big Machine Label Group and its master recordings, which include Swift’s six pre-Lover albums, in June. Upon news of the sale, Swift wrote in a Tumblr post that it was her “worst case scenario,” accusing Braun of “bullying” her throughout her career due to his connections with West. She maintains today that she was never given the opportunity to buy her masters outright. (On Tumblr, she wrote that she was offered the chance to “earn” back the masters to one of her albums for each new album she turned in if she re-signed with Big Machine; Borchetta disputed this characterization, saying she had the opportunity to acquire her masters in exchange for re-signing with the label for a “length of time” - 10 more years, according to screenshots of legal documents posted on the Big Machine website.)

Swift has said that she intends to rerecord her first six albums next year, starting next November, when she says she’s contractually able to - in order to regain control of her recordings. But the back-and-forth appears to be nowhere near over: Last month, Swift alleged that Borchetta and Braun were blocking her from performing her past hits at the American Music Awards or using them in an upcoming Netflix documentary - claims Big Machine characterized as “false information” in a response that did not get into specifics. (Swift ultimately performed the medley she had planned.) In the weeks following this interview, Braun said he was open to “all possibilities” in finding a “resolution,” and Billboard sources say that includes negotiating a sale. Swift remains interested in buying her masters, though the price could be a sticking point, given her rerecording plans, the control she has over the licensing of her music for film and TV, and the market growth since Braun’s acquisition.

However it plays out, the battle over her masters is the latest in a series of moves that has turned Swift into something of an advocate for artists’ rights, and made her a cause that everyone from Halsey to Elizabeth Warren has rallied behind. From 2014 to 2017, Swift withheld her catalog from Spotify to protest the streaming company’s compensation rates, saying in a 2014 interview, “There should be an inherent value placed on art. I didn’t see that happening, perception-wise, when I put my music on Spotify.” In 2015, ahead of the launch of Apple Music, Swift wrote an open letter criticizing Apple for its plan to not pay royalties during the three-month free trial it was set to offer listeners; the company announced a new policy within 24 hours. Most recently, when she signed a new global deal with Universal Music Group in 2018, Swift (who is now on Republic Records) said one of the conditions of her contract was that UMG share proceeds from any sale of its Spotify equity with its roster of artists - and make them non-recoupable against those artists’ earnings.

During a wide-ranging conversation, Billboard’s Woman of the Decade expresses hope that she can help make the lives of creators a little easier in the years to come - and a belief that her behind-the-scenes strides will be as integral to her legacy as her biggest singles. “New artists and producers and writers need work, and they need to be likable and get booked in sessions, and they can’t make noise - but if I can, then I’m going to,” promises Swift. This is where being impossibly famous can be a very good thing. “I know that it seems like I’m very loud about this,” she says, “but it’s because someone has to be.”

While watching some of your performances this year - like SNL and NPR’s Tiny Desk Concert - I was struck by how focused you seemed, like there were no distractions getting in the way of what you were trying to say. That’s a really wonderful way of looking at this phase of my life and my music. I’ve spent a lot of time re-calibrating my life to make it feel manageable. Because there were some years there where I felt like I didn’t quite know what exactly to give people and what to hold back, what to share and what to protect. I think a lot of people go through that, especially in the last decade. I broke through pre-social media, and then there was this phase where social media felt fun and casual and quirky and safe. And then it got to the point where everyone has to evaluate their relationship with social media. So I decided that the best thing I have to offer people is my music. I’m not really here to influence their fashion or their social lives. That has bled through into the live part of what I do.

Meanwhile, you’ve found a way to interact with your fans in this very pure way - on your Tumblr page. Tumblr is the last place on the internet where I feel like I can still make a joke because it feels small, like a neighborhood rather than an entire continent. We can kid around - they literally drag me. It’s fun. That’s a real comfort zone for me. And just like anything else, I need breaks from it sometimes. But when I do participate in that space, it’s always in a very inside-joke, friend vibe. Sometimes, when I open Twitter, I get so overwhelmed that I just immediately close it. I haven’t had Twitter on my phone in a while because I don’t like to have too much news. Like, I follow politics, and that’s it. But I don’t like to follow who has broken up with who, or who wore an interesting pair of shoes. There’s only so much bandwidth my brain can really have.

You’ve spoken in recent interviews about the general expectations you’ve faced, using phrases like “They’ve wanted to see this” and “They hated me for this.” Who is “they”? Is it social media or disparaging think pieces or... It’s sort of an amalgamation of all of it. People who aren’t active fans of your music, who like one song but love to hear who has been canceled on Twitter. I’ve had several upheavals of somehow not being what I should be. And this happens to women in music way more than men. That’s why I get so many phone calls from new artists out of the blue - like, “Hey, I’m getting my first wave of bad press, I’m freaking out, can I talk to you?” And the answer is always yes! I’m talking about more than 20 people who have randomly reached out to me. I take it as a compliment because it means that they see what has happened over the course of my career, over and over again.

Did you have someone like that to reach out to? Not really, because my career has existed in lots of different neighborhoods of music. I had so many mentors in country music. Faith Hill was wonderful. She would reach out to me and invite me over and take me on tour, and I knew that I could talk to her. Crossing over to pop is a completely different world. Country music is a real community, and in pop I didn’t see that community as much. Now there is a bit of one between the girls in pop - we all have each other’s numbers and text each other - but when I first started out in pop it was very much you versus you versus you. We didn’t have a network, which is weird because we can help each other through these moments when you just feel completely isolated.

Do you feel like those barriers are actively being broken down now? God, I hope so. I also hope people can call it out, [like] if you see a Grammy prediction article, and it’s just two women’s faces next to each other and feels a bit gratuitous. No one’s going to start out being perfectly educated on the intricacies of gender politics. The key is that people are trying to learn, and that’s great. No one’s going to get it perfect, but, God, please try.

At this point, who is your sounding board, creatively and professionally From a creative standpoint, I’ve been writing alone a lot more. I’m good with being alone, with thinking alone. When I come up with a marketing idea for the Lover tour, the album launch, the merch, I’ll go right to my management company that I’ve put together. I think a team is the best way to be managed. Just from my experience, I don’t think that this overarching, one-person-handles-my-career thing was ever going to work for me. Because that person ends up kind of being me who comes up with most of the ideas, and then I have an amazing team that facilitates those ideas. The behind-the-scenes work is different for every phase of my career that I’m in. Putting together the festival shows that we’re doing for Lover is completely different than putting together the Reputation Stadium Tour. Putting together the reputation launch was so different than putting together the 1989 launch. So we really do attack things case by case, where the creative first informs everything else.

You’ve spoken before about how meaningful the reputation tour’s success was. What did it represent? That tour was something that I wanted to immortalize in the Netflix special that we did because the album was a story, but it almost was like a story that wasn’t fully realized until you saw it live. It was so cool to hear people leaving the show being like, “I understand it now. I fully get it now.” There are a lot of red herrings and bait-and-switches in the choices that I’ll make with albums, because I want people to go and explore the body of work. You can never express how you feel over the course of an album in a single, so why try?

That seems especially true of your last three albums or so. “Shake It Off” is nothing like the rest of 1989. It’s almost like I feel so much pressure with a first single that I don’t want the first single to be something that makes you feel like you’ve figured out what I’ve made on the rest of the project. I still truly believe in albums, whatever form you consume them in - if you want to stream them or buy them or listen to them on vinyl. And I don’t think that makes me a staunch purist. I think that that is a strong feeling throughout the music industry. We’re running really fast toward a singles industry, but you got to believe in something. I still believe that albums are important.

The music industry has become increasingly global during the past decade. Is reaching new markets something you think about? Yeah, and I’m always trying to learn. I’m learning from everyone. I’m learning when I go see Bruce Springsteen or Madonna do a theater show. And I’m learning from new artists who are coming out right now, just seeing what they’re doing and thinking, “That’s really cool.” You need to keep your influences broad and wide-ranging, and my favorite people who make music have always done that. I got to work with Andrew Lloyd Webber on the Cats movie, and Andrew will walk through the door and be like, “I’ve just seen this amazing thing on TikTok!” And I’m like, “You are it! You are it!” Because you cannot look at what quote-unquote “the kids are doing” and roll your eyes. You have to learn.

Have you explored TikTok at all? I only see them when they’re posted to Tumblr, but I love them! I think that they’re hilarious and amazing. Andrew says that they’ve made musicals cool again, because there’s a huge musical facet to TikTok. [He’s] like, “Any way we can do that is good.”

How do you see your involvement in the business side of your career progressing in the next decade? You seem like someone who could eventually start a label or be more hands-on with signing artists. I do think about it every once in a while, but if I was going to do it, I would need to do it with all of my energy. I know how important that is, when you’ve got someone else’s career in your hands, and I know how it feels when someone isn’t generous.

You’ve served as an ambassador of sorts for artists, especially recently - staring down streaming services over payouts, increasing public awareness about the terms of record deals. We have a long way to go. I think that we’re working off of an antiquated contractual system. We’re galloping toward a new industry but not thinking about re-calibrating financial structures and compensation rates, taking care of producers and writers. We need to think about how we handle master recordings, because this isn’t it. When I stood up and talked about this, I saw a lot of fans saying, “Wait, the creators of this work do not own their work, ever?” I spent 10 years of my life trying rigorously to purchase my masters outright and was then denied that opportunity, and I just don’t want that to happen to another artist if I can help it. I want to at least raise my hand and say, “This is something that an artist should be able to earn back over the course of their deal - not as a renegotiation ploy - and something that artists should maybe have the first right of refusal to buy.” God, I would have paid so much for them! Anything to own my work that was an actual sale option, but it wasn’t given to me. Thankfully, there’s power in writing your music. Every week, we get a dozen synch requests to use “Shake It Off” in some advertisement or “Blank Space” in some movie trailer, and we say no to every single one of them. And the reason I’m rerecording my music next year is because I do want my music to live on. I do want it to be in movies, I do want it to be in commercials. But I only want that if I own it.

Do you know how long that rerecording process will take? I don’t know! But it’s going to be fun, because it’ll feel like regaining a freedom and taking back what’s mine. When I created [these songs], I didn’t know what they would grow up to be. Going back in and knowing that it meant something to people is actually a really beautiful way to celebrate what the fans have done for my music.

Ten years ago, on the brink of the 2010s, you were about to turn 20. What advice would you give yourself if you could go back in time? Oh, God - I wouldn’t give myself any advice. I would have done everything exactly the same way. Because even the really tough things I’ve gone through taught me things that I never would have learned any other way. I really appreciate my experience, the ups and downs. And maybe that seems ridiculously Zen, but... I’ve got my friends, who like me for the right reasons. I’ve got my family. I’ve got my boyfriend. I’ve got my fans. I’ve got my cats.

Taylor Swift Discusses 'The Man' & 'It's Nice To Have a Friend' In Cover Story Outtakes

Billboard // by Jason Lipshutz // December 12th 2019

During her cover story interview for Billboard’s Women In Music issue, Taylor Swift discussed several aspects of her mega-selling seventh studio album Lover, including its creation after a personal “recalibrating” period, her stripped-down performances of its songs and her plans to showcase the full-length live with her Lover Fest shows next year. In two moments from the extended conversation that did not make the print story, Billboard’s Woman of the Decade also touched upon two of the album’s highlights, which double as a pair of the more interesting songs in her discography: “The Man” and “It’s Nice To Have A Friend.”

“The Man” imagines how Swift’s experience as a person, artist and figure within the music industry would have been different had she been a man, highlighting how much harder women have to work in order to succeed (“I’m so sick of running as fast as I can / Wondering if I’d get there quicker if I was a man,” she sings in the chorus). The song has become a fan favorite since the release of Lover, and Swift recently opened a career-spanning medley with the song at the 2019 American Music Awards.

When asked about “The Man,” Swift pointed out specific double standards that exist in everyday life and explained why she wanted to turn that frustration into a pop single. Read Swift’s full thoughts on “The Man” below:

“It was a song that I wrote from my personal experience, but also from a general experience that I’ve heard from women in all parts of our industry. And I think that, the more we can talk about it in a song like that, the better off we’ll be in a place to call it out when it’s happening. So many of these things are ingrained in even women, these perceptions, and it’s really about re-training your own brain to be less critical of women when we are not criticizing men for the same things. So many things that men do, you know, can be phoned-in that cannot be phoned-in for us. We have to really — God, we have to curate and cater everything, but we have to make it look like an accident. Because if we make a mistake, that’s our fault, but if we strategize so that we won’t make a mistake, we’re calculating.

“There is a bit of a damned-if-we-do, damned-if-we-don’t thing happening in music, and that’s why when I can, like, sit and talk and be like ‘Yeah, this sucks for me too,’ that feels good. When I go online and hear the stories of my fans talking about their experience in the working world, or even at school — the more we talk about it, the better off we’ll be. And I wanted to make it catchy for a reason — so that it would get stuck in people’s heads, [so] they would end up with a song about gender inequality stuck in their heads. And for me, that’s a good day.”

Meanwhile, the penultimate song on Lover, “It’s Nice To Have A Friend,” sounds unlike anything in Swift’s catalog thanks to its elliptical structure, lullaby-like tone and incorporation of steel drums and brass. When asked about the song, Swift talked about experimenting with her songwriting, as well as capturing a different angle of the emotional themes at the heart of Lover. Read Swift’s full thoughts on “It’s Nice To Have A Friend” below:

“It was fun to write a song that was just verses, because my whole body and soul wants to make a chorus — every time I sit down to write a song, I’m like, ‘Okay, chorus time, let’s get the chorus done.’ But with that song, it was more of like a poem, and a story and a vibe and a feeling of... I love metaphors that kind of have more than one meaning, and I think I loved the idea that, on an album called Lover, we all want love, we all want to find somebody to see our sights with and hear things with and experience things with.

“But at the end of the day we’ve been searching for that since we were kids! When you had a friend when you were nine years old, and that friend was all you talked about, and you wanted to have sleepovers and you wanted to walk down the street together and sit there drawing pictures together or be silent together, or be talking all night. We’re just looking for that, but endless sparks, as adults.”

Read the full Taylor Swift cover story here, and click here for more info on Billboard’s 2019 Women In Music event, during which Swift will be presented with the first-ever Woman of the Decade award.

[link to this tweet]

Was there ever a part of you that was like, “Oh shit, I like this darker vibe, let’s go even further down that path?” I really Loved Reputation because it felt like a rock opera, or a musical, doing it live. Doing that stadium show was so fun because it was so theatrical and so exciting to perform that, because it’s really cathartic! But I have to follow whatever direction my life is going in emotionally... The skies were opening up in my life. That’s what happened. But in a way that felt like a pink sky, a pink and purple sky, after a storm, and now it looks even more beautiful because it looked so stormy before. And that’s just like, I couldn't stop writing. I’ve never had an album with 18 songs on it before, and a lot of what I do is based on intuition. So, you know, I try not to overthink it. Who knows, there may be another dark album. I plan on doing lots of experimentation over the course of my career. Who knows? But it was a blast, I really loved it.

I mean, look, a Taylor Swift screamo album? I’ll be first in line. I’m so happy to hear that, because I think you might be the only one. Ha! I have a terrible scream. It’s obnoxious.

Why Taylor Swift's Lover Fest Will Be Her Next Big Step

Billboard // by Jason Lipshutz // December 11th 2019 - [Excerpt]

On why she chose to put together Lover fest: “I haven’t really done festivals in years - not since I was a teenager. That’s something that [the fans] don’t expect from me, so that’s why I wanted to do it. I want to challenge myself with new things and at the same time keep giving my fans something to connect to.”

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austencello · 4 years

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Fadeout - Arrow Music Notes 8x10

The final episode brings the series to a close as the characters deal with a changed world and reality without Oliver Queen. The show brings closure to the characters and the audience as everyone says a final goodbye. Due to this being the last one, almost everything was a musical callback to a previous moment on Arrow which means this analysis is going to be on the long side.

A New World

The music usually chosen for Oliver’s intro speeches includes previous music from the series and often heroic sounding but not with specific meaning. This last one was a little different as it used the heroic justice/league heroes music from Crisis as Oliver explains that he became something else and birthed a new universe. He became the leader of all the heroes and set the stage for a changed world.

The episode begins with one of the most heart-breaking scenes from the series: Moira’s death. The same music “Promise Kept” (2x20) accompanies the scene until things change. As soon as Oliver cuts himself free and stops Slade, his hero theme 2 (“Time to Go Home” 2x01) plays in the horn while he saves his mom, changing her fate. In a similar way, the same music for the flashback of Robert Queen telling Oliver to survive contains the same music as the pilot and the hammered dulcimer plays the hero theme as Mia wakes up in the future.

The Documentary from 7x12 returns as a Memorial beginning with Moira as she tries to wrap her head around the fact that she died in a different reality and that the whole world was a gift from her son. As she speaks, high electronics play “Honor Memory” (1x02) which originally played for Oliver when he tried to honor the memory of his father, torn between how he would honor his father’s sacrifice and mission to right his wrongs as a Vigilante and how he may appear less honoring as Oliver Queen, especially in the beginning. It returned several times as Oliver dealt with the fact that his father was less honorable than he believed. He grew over the seasons recognizing with the help of Felicity and others that he did not need to carry the burden of his father’s past but continue his own legacy of heroism and love, sacrificing himself to save not only the world but those he loved, including his mother who now has chance to honor him.

Dinah, Rene, and Diggle speak to the Documentary team about Oliver and the changes he made both for them and the city. The music hearkens to the synths and lower bass sounds that the original documentary had. Rene drops by after Diggle talks to the camera discussing the fact that crime has disappeared overnight thanks to Oliver, but Diggle is not ready to believe that the mission is over yet. As they talk about Oliver saving the city, hammered dulcimer (one of Oliver’s instruments since the pilot) accompanies the scene. His instruments and presence is felt throughout the episode even though he himself is not visible in the present time.

Diggle and Rene meet up with Roy, Dinah and Laurel to toast to Oliver with Vodka and discuss what they are planning on doing next. Piano and higher electronics play a theme from 7x10 that had been used for Emiko and Rene’s conversations when Rene shared that he wanted to help the city. Now, he shares a new stage of that dream by running for Mayor after Lance steps down with his endorsement and Dinah shares her upcoming promotion. The piano (Oliver’s instrument) plays the theme as another sign of Oliver’s gift to his team and city for a better future.

Rene asks Diggle when Felicity will be coming in for the funeral and Diggle replies that she might not make it as she hasn’t gotten out of bed since they received the news of Oliver’s death. As he shares this, a piano version of “Being Happy” (1x07) plays. This theme is usually over electronics (“Own Worst enemy”) in the strings. It originally was with Oliver and Tommy’s tough relationship as Tommy believed Oliver was a murderer but at the same time recognized that Oliver’s choices especially in lying to everyone closest to him took a toll: “If you are alone, you’ll never be happy.” Oliver responded that his happiness wasn’t what was important. However, one of the beautiful growing parts for Oliver was that over time, he did accept happiness and others into his life, especially the love of his life and his daughter Mia. The theme comes back in 7x22 as Oliver and Felicity happily share a life together with baby Mia, a life of happiness and everything Oliver deserved. But now he is gone and Felicity is left alone, grieving. This music is in the piano (Oliver’s instrument) but stripped down to simple piano chords, getting rid of all the other instruments and even changing to minor/sadder chords. It’s an echo of the happiness that they had.

While many people were brought back to life in this new reality such as Moira, Quentin, Tommy and Emiko, there were two notable exceptions: Robert and Laurel. Laurel from Earth 2 struggled with this knowledge, feeling guilty that it was because of her that Quentin did not have his daughter back. She goes to talk to him about it as “She was my rock/Canary Flies Away” (4x20) plays. This theme was first heard as Quentin struggled with Laurel’s death throughout season 4 and 5. Later on, it was used to forge connections between himself and Laurel 2 as Quentin recognized her as family while still knowing she wasn’t his original daughter. Here, Quentin tells Laurel in a fatherly tone that nothing needed to be fixed about her which is why Oliver didn’t change anything in regards to her.

Flashbacks

Diggle remembers when he joined the team and Oliver wasn’t letting him go at on the field yet. As Oliver appears and crosses another name off the list, high electronics play reminiscent of “On the List.” Although the melody is a little different, the atmospheric electronics are the same and then the hammered dulcimer plays a new melody as Diggle asks Oliver when the list/mission will end and Oliver responds that it will never end. The high electronics return as Diggle tries to help Oliver and bring down the body count, to convince him that there are other ways of justice beside killing them.

Oliver still goes after the bad guy on his own and kills everyone in his way in a classic Season 1 vibe. In the same fashion, the music reflects Season 1 fight music: string patterns, electronics, and brass but without most of the classic Arrow themes until the end. The brass glissando is heard as he zips up out at the end and then the Arrow string pattern and the hero theme (brass) plays as he lands and decides not to kill but just apprehend the bad guy. The brass hero theme was actually used quite sparingly in Season 1. Outside of the pilot “Setting up the Lair” in guitar harmonics, it was often heard in snippets - 2 or 3 notes instead of all four such as in “Damaged.” While that does occur throughout the all Seasons also for musical effect, in the first Season it is because he is not fully a hero yet. The entire motif is heard in the brass (a heroic sound) in 1x14 when he reveals himself to Felicity and then she and Diggle saves his life. She is the light that can see the hero he becomes and it is through her faith, the loyalty and morality of Diggle, and the decision no longer to kill after Tommy’s death, that set him in motion to move from a killing Vigilante to a hero. In fact, it isn’t used in the Title theme until Season 2 as Oliver begins this shift and the theme is heard much more frequently in fighting scenes such as “A Different Way” (2x01).

Theroy

Thea and Roy reunite again after Roy freaked out and left her over the past year or two. After trying to apologize (with bad timing), the two of them search for William together as “Team Continues Without Oliver” (3x11) plays in electronics and percussion in their running and jumping off roofs, which includes Roy’s Arsenal Theme. Roy proceeds to apologize for leaving her and proposes. While he does so, “I can’t lose you twice” (1x20) accompanies the scene. This theme accompanied several couples such as Laurel and Tommy’s relationship, Laurel and Oliver (1x23), Felicity and Oliver, and Roy and Thea. It first played for Thea and Roy in 1x20 as Roy is determined to find the vigilante, telling Thea that his life is connected to his own and she agrees to help find him. At that point, they would have no idea how true that would become even to the point of Roy saying he was the Arrow and taking the fall so that Oliver could stay and not go to jail in Season 3. This theme returned when Thea found Roy/Jason in 3x22 giving him back the Arsenal jacket and they end up kissing. They both have had different journeys to find themselves and the heroes they became. Having died and come back to life has given Roy a new perspective that he wants Thea in his life for always which leads to this moment.

Thea doesn’t give him an answer right away until after William is found and they meet up in the Queen mansion. She first asks him to promise that he will never freak out and leave without talking to her. The music is accompanied by clarinet (one of Thea’s instruments) first heard in 5x15. It originally played when Thea tells Oliver she is leaving and not to ask her to stay as she needed to figure out who she was. This theme then returns in 6x16 (“Take Good Care of Her”) as she and Roy plan to leave together to destroy the Lazarus pits. Roy told her that he was going with her because all that mattered was that they were together. She found both her calling and was able to leave with Roy. Despite the bumps that happened since then, she realizes she doesn’t want to waste anymore time without Roy by her side and says yes to his proposal.

Mia and Felicity Return

Sara brought back Mia to attend Oliver’s funeral and she tries to “channel her mom” at the computers as Dinah finds her. While not being to tell much about the future, she does share that something happened and making her feel like she has already failed at being the Green Arrow and living in her father’s legacy. Different instruments enter in with strings, brass, a low electronic bass (used more for Mia) and then hammered dulcimer as Dinah tells her that Oliver would be proud of her. Hammered Dulcimer is one of Oliver’s instruments since the pilot and it represents how he would be proud of her as well as continuing on the legacy through his instruments as well as a bow and arrow. Electronics enter which were used both for Archer and the future as William is revealed to have been kidnapped, making Mia live through her brother being kidnapped in both the past and future.

Wlliam’s kidapping brings back everyone who had been on the team including Felicity. As she appears in the bunker, oboe plays the first two notes of the Olicity theme “The One I Love/Convince Him” (2x23, 3x20). Having even part of that theme in their instrument as she appears to come out of her grief for losing the love of her life for the sake of their son is poignant but it is also presented in a happier (major) mood as she brings joy, light, and hope to the team as well to viewers who have missed her presence. As she hugs Diggle and Dinah and greets the team, guitar harmonics (Oliver’s instruments) and harp (Felicity’s instrument) double a pattern from “New Suit” (4x01). At that point, Oliver was discouraged after Lance told him he was responsible for bringing all the darkness into everyone’s life which was one of the reasons he didn’t want to return from his life in Ivy Town. He felt like the only way to fight darkness was to be darkness and he didn’t want to be that type of person anymore. Felicity reminded him that he didn’t have to be that person anymore and that he wasn’t alone. Now years later, Oliver has become a better person and furthermore, inspired a room of heroes to fight for the city, the world, and to bring Oliver’s family back. The oboe plays one more note as Felicity passes Mia signifying their relationship even though Felicity is not aware of it yet. Classic sounding Arrow music starts as Diggle calls them to suit up.

Mia is the one who finds her brother, landing on the roof as her hero theme (7x08) plays in the electric guitar. After the scene transitions back to her from the Flashback fight, string patterns and a low continuing electric bass note crescendos in the music that is very reminiscent of Oliver’s fight music as she chooses to not kill him and make the same decision that Oliver did, following in his footsteps.

Felicity finds out from Sara and Diggle that the young woman she is seeing with William is her daughter. They ask if she wants to meet her but she is a little reluctant since baby Mia is at home. She doesn’t want to rush the fact that she gets to watch Mia grow up. As she processes this, guitar harmonics play a theme from 7x16 when Felicity and Mia reconnect after Mia, Connor and William rescued Felicity. At that point, Mia was angry and confused with her mom who had told her heroic stories of her Dad that conflicted with the villain story the world was telling her. But regardless of hating vigilantes and hating her mom, she started to understand it was for her protection. Felicity told her that she was so much like her father and was proud of her. The theme returned in 8x03 as Mia was confronted with the possibility of losing William, terrified to lose the only family she had left. Now Felicity sees her daughter, a hero who saved younger William. It is a theme of love, connection and a family that had been broken by the loss of Oliver and fear to lose each other, but restored through Oliver’s sacrifice so that William, Mia, and Felicity will have each other in this reality.

Dinah brings Mia’s attention to the news reporting a new Green Arrow, most likely part of a new generations inspired by Oliver. As she hears this, it starts with electronics reminiscent of the future and then adding strings with the first part of Oliver’s Arrow theme moving into something new including high female voices as Dinah reminds Mia that Oliver would be proud of her. It provides an epic quality in the music, a reassurance that Oliver is looking over Mia with an almost otherworldly sound and that she is in fact part of the new generation of heroes, following in her father’s footsteps.

Saying Goodbye

Diggle comes to terms with the fact the mission is in fact over for himself and family in Star City. He meets Dinah and Rene as they share plans for their future as well as saying goodbye to the bunker. He tells them that according to Sara, Oliver became something else as Spectre and so he liked to think Oliver was still with them, watching over them. As he says this, the piano plays Oliver’s slow Arrow theme “I forgot who I was” (1x05) in the manner used for intimate moments for Oliver when he shared his heart for those closest to him, including 6x03 when he thanked Diggle for helping him become the Green Arrrow. Musically, it seemed to confirm that Oliver was watching over them. As these three share about their future, having become better people due to Oliver and each other, and then turning off the lights, a music theme from the flash forwards play (7x10) in high electronics (almost bell like). Originally it was for the Mark of 4, having promised to be there for each other and yet these promises were broken as the team had splintered. It also played when the kids showed up in the bunker in 8x04 as Oliver was trying to process that his grown-up kids were there. Using this theme again as the world has changed and the 8x09 episode showed a brighter future for all of them, returns to that original intent of being there for each other even as they go their separate ways. A version of the Arrow theme plays as the lights go out for the last time.

Quentin gives a speech to honor Oliver and reveal a statue looking over the city. Harp and piano play as it begins with a beautiful and quiet version of Oliver’s hero theme as Quentin thanks everyone for coming and begins by admitting that for a long time he hated Oliver and blamed him for Sara’s death and the violence in the city. The theme changes as strings are added as he talks about how became an honorable man and proof that anyone can change. Oliver wasn’t just a hero but a good man. The theme that plays as the statue is revealed is “United Campaign Speech” (4x04) first heard when Oliver started his campaign as mayor, focusing on the theme of being united and working together. Oliver’s dream in becoming mayor was to save the city in the light and not just in the shadows. Right before he gave his speech (written by Thea), Thea told him the reason they had so many supporters and interns to help was because they believed like she did, that he was going to save the city. He said the same thing in his speech: he returned with one goal to save his city which is possible with the help of friends, family, loved ones, those they trust, and those they need to trust again. This dream may not have come true in way Oliver foresaw, whether it was with the List in the beginning or being mayor in the middle, but ultimately he did save the city which was revealed to be written on the statue as the Arrow theme plays. It became possible because of the people he loved and who loved him back who all stand there to honor this hero, the man who changed their lives.

Everyone gathers at the funeral as different characters interact or meet for the first time. Thea asks Moira why Oliver didn’t bring back Robert as “Sad Moira” (1x10). “Sad Moira” was first heard as its own melody when Oliver checks on Moira after Walter was kidnapped and in similar situations in seasons 1 and 2 when she was missing her children or Walter. Now, Moira is missing both Oliver and Robert as she acknowledges that Oliver would never have become the man he was if it hasn’t been for the loss of Oliver. The theme is also heard as the counter-melody/harmony in “I forgot who I was/Own Worst Enemy” (2x18) which is all about love and loss for the Queen family. It was used in moments for Oliver with Moira, Thea, William, and Emiko. This counter-melody plays one last time as Emiko comes to meet Thea, another proof of Oliver healing his family in a place that had been broken.

Tommy and Laurel meet as Tommy is trying to wrap around his mind of previous realities where he died and the fact that he is meeting his wife’s doppleganger. Tommy and Laurel’s theme “Surprise me” (1x03) plays as he shares that he married Laurel 1 in this life.

Mia meets Felicity for the first time as an adult as high synths and violins play which is used in emotional moments especially with Felicity. There are echoes of a melody like “Honor Memory” (1x02), giving space for the emotions as Mia tells Felicity that she got to meet her dad who taught her how to be a hero as echoes of Oliver’s hero theme are heard.

Felicity asks Diggle to share a few words as they stand around Oliver’s tombstone. Diggle shares that Oliver changed a lot since they met 8 years ago, becoming a better man who inspired all of them, bringing heroes into the world, but most importantly a brother to him. He still recognizes that the mission of hope and justice will continue beyond Star City with Oliver living on in the people he inspired, even though the world is less bright without him in it. He says he doesn’t see what the future holds as glimpses of the future are shown to the audience with Mia returning to the future, Rene running for mayor, and Diggle receiving the Green Lantern ring. The music for this whole speech is “Forgive Us/Goodbye to Roy” (3x19). In the beginning of the theme, Oliver believed Roy was dead and blamed himself, while Diggle and Felicity revealed that it was a ruse to protect Oliver even though Roy would have to be in exile. This was hard for Oliver to accept but Roy was willing to take the fall for the man who saved his life and gave him purpose. It was a theme of saying goodbye and self-sacrifice. Now, it is Oliver who has made the ultimate sacrifice to save all of them. But there is also hope of a future, first for Roy and now for all of the heroes head out on their new journey. Oliver’s hero theme plays in the piano at the end as it focuses on his tombstone: husband, father, brother, son, hero.

The Reunion

As Felicity prepares to leave in the future, the music is sad and full of loss playing “Everyone Left” (5x02). This was used in 7x22 when Felicity, Mia and William were at Oliver’s grave before she left so it makes sense for that to continue as she has been waiting a long time to see Oliver. A high electronic changes locations (almost heavenly) as she walks through. The music is in major (different for a show set in minor) bringing light and happiness with piano and strings as Felicity arrives in a version of the QC office. Harp (Felicity’s instrument) and piano (Oliver’s) play Oliver’s hero theme as she looks at his picture with the red pen in her mouth. It is a quiet intimate, peaceful moment as she turns and sees Oliver smiling at her and the harp quietly plays a repeating note as she greets him and they kiss. Then the Olicity theme “The one I love” (2x23) plays in the cellos as she tells him that this is so nice despite being a little confused that they were in a version of his old office. One of the ways it is made so quietly peaceful is the lack of any movement under the main theme, usually piano or harp moving underneath. Everything is stripped away except their love theme as they see each other for the first time in 20 years. Oliver tells Felicity that he wanted to meet where he first saw her and the flashback from Season 3 is shown. Violins, female voice, and guitar harmonics are added as he continues that they have all the time in the world to tell her about it. Musically having the voice brings memories from 3x20 and 3x23 when they drive away reminding us of Oliver declaring: “I’m happy.” Oliver and Felicity have found peace and happiness as they are reunited with their theme soaring before the Arrow theme plays one last time as the show comes to a close.

Extra Notes and Thank-you:

I decided not to do a deep dive into the Olicity theme since I have done that a lot in the past and this was already crazy long. But for those of you who are interested, I have list of every time the Olicity theme has been used (minus this episode).

https://austencello.tumblr.com/post/182940428674/list-of-olicity-themes

I decided not to review 8x09 at this point. As a back-door pilot, it picks up some older themes like Mia’s theme which occurred a lot but most of it was new which makes it harder to analyze. We shall when/if the show gets picked up whether I will write about the show.

Thanks to all you for your kind words regarding my “Goodbye to Oliver” cello arrangement I made last week. I really appreciate it!

Finishing this is a bit bittersweet. I would never have imagined Oliver’s journey to end up this way (I would never have guessed Olicity would be one of my favorite ships of all times at Season 1) but neither would I have imagined when I started watching this 8 years ago, that I would be analyzing the score for 4 and a half years (103 Arrow Music Notes!), make and meet friends from around the world, interact with Blake Neely on Twitter, arrange the score for cello, work on music collaborations with @jorahandal, and meet a lot of the cast at conventions. It’s been a lot of fun and quite a ride. Thank you to all who have been on part of this journey with me as well as to Blake Neely, Nathaniel Blume and his whole team for creating such great music throughout the seasons.

For of those of you asking what is next...I’m going to take a break from music analysis as my life gets a little busy over the next few months. I’m hoping to shift to a few more arrangements and analysis of some of my favorite Jane Austen and period dramas over the next year or so.

@academyofshipping @ah-maa-zing @smoakmonster @herskirtsarentthatshort @mel-loves-all @dust2dust34 @dmichellewrites @pulpklatura @cogentranting @withgraceandlight99 @scu11y22 @almondblossomme @green-arrows-of-karamel @hotcookinmama @latinasmoak @callistawolf @jbuffyangel

#arrow music notes #arrow 8x10 #oliver queen #olicity #john diggle #theroy #moira queen #thea queen #roy harper #felicity smoak #mia smoak queen #quentin lance #laurel lance #blake neely #nathaniel blume

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goingoverthegardenwall · 5 years

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Chapter 6: Lullaby in Frogland

Let’s look back. Way back. Back before the dawn of animation, before the dawn of film, well before Ruby or Spears or Disney or Iwerks or either Fleischer Brother. Back to 1835, in a town named Florida in a state named Missouri when a boy named Samuel was born.

Like Ub Iwerks, Sam was raised in Missouri. And like Max Fleischer, Sam’s family took a financial hit when his father’s work stopped (this time due to a premature death rather than the decline of tailory), giving Sam a practical approach to employment. He left school at age eleven to become a printer’s apprentice, then moved to his older brother’s newspaper as a typesetter and occasional columnist, writing humorous articles and drawing cartoons. But unlike Beatrix Potter or the animators we’ve covered, visual art wasn’t in the cards for Sam.

He moved to the East Coast to work for other papers, bouncing between cities before returning to the midwest to embark on a career he’d dreamed of since he was old enough to dream: piloting a steamboat. He thrived on the water, and kept writing about his work along the river, but everything stopped when the Civil War closed off the Mississippi. So Sam headed west to work for the same brother who once ran the newspaper, now a politician in Nevada (I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out that this brother was for some reason named Orion). Sam tried mining, and it didn’t take, but he’d gotten pretty good at writing and set off for San Francisco to get back into his jocular brand of journalism.

It was here that he had his first success, a short story published in his paper called Jim Smiley and His Jumping Frog. But, like a certain frog we’ve covered in this series, Sam wasn’t huge on permanent names. Within a month, the story was reprinted as The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, and Jim Smiley’s name was changed to Jim Greeley. Until the book version came out, when it was changed back to Jim Smiley. And this whole time, within the story, it’s a mystery whether Jim’s real name is actually Leonidas (it turns out that it isn’t, but it might be). None of this should come as a surprise for Samuel Clemens, who wrote under the names of Josh, Thomas Jefferson Snodgrass, and most famously, Mark Twain.

“I knew you were special.”

Over the Garden Wall is, among other things, a story about the importance of solid communication. After five episodes spent building up our heroes as a group of friends, all it takes is one episode of terrible communication to throw it all away. The specific issues vary, despite leading to a similar result of not verbalizing their thoughts very well: Greg’s youth stops him from articulating his rapidly changing ideas, Wirt’s anxiety leaves him too timid to speak up or too rambling to be clear, Beatrice’s true intentions make her obfuscate the truth, and Jason Funderburker straight-up can’t talk. Or so we think.

This time he’s named for American statesmen George Washington and Benjamin Franklin, which fits the continuing vintage Americana vibe of the series—while I figure it’s a coincidence, it should be noted that Mark Twain’s Jumping Frog was named after American statesman Daniel Webster. Surrounded by other frogs that walk around and wear fancy garb, our frog is more anthropomorphic than ever, standing on his hind legs and dancing along with Greg. But it’s still a shock to hear him open his mouth and sing, a shock that soon cedes to the realization that the frog playing the piano at the beginning of the series is singing the Jack Jones song in the montage that follows.

Lullaby in Frogland is Jason Funderburker’s episode through and through, so much so that it’s the first time we hear of his namesake, Jason Funderberker. This is an episode where Wirt rejects Greg’s assertion that their frog is “our frog,” a plot point that’s paid off in their last conversation in the series. This is an episode where Greg wonders aloud if he can be a hero, sees the frog set off on a diverging path immediately afterwards, and accepts it, because he’s willing to sacrifice his happiness for the good of others. And it’s an episode where the frog returns after a harrowing betrayal, showing that even when all seems lost, there’s still room for hope. Over the Garden Wall (the song) might not sound like a traditional lullaby, but it soothes us into a cold night as the sun sets on the first half of Over the Garden Wall (the show).

Adelaide’s true nature is foreshadowed by Beatrice’s sudden hesitance to bring the brothers to the pasture after several episodes of nagging, but the twist is made tragic by Wirt finally letting his guard down enough to be happy. He sings a completed Adelaide Parade with Greg and joins the dance before collapsing into the most earnest laughter I’ve ever heard in a cartoon. He’s a good enough friend to notice when Beatrice is “uncharacteristically wistful,” and takes a risk by playing the bassoon instead of just giving up. He’s still got growing to do—it’s one thing to blame Greg for getting them in trouble by throwing away the ferry fare and forcing them to sneak aboard, but another thing to literally shout “Take him, not me!” when confronted by the frog fuzz—so it’s clear that his journey isn’t over yet, but he doesn’t even get a full episode of peace before everything blows up.

The whole steamboat sequence flows between simple delights, like saluting the captain mid-chase, the revelation that the frogs love music more than they hate trespassers, and the repeated gags of three gentlemen frogs snatching up flying flies and a frog mother dropping her tadpoles. Everything just feels calm, even when antics are afoot. Wirt gets to save the day with his bassooning, Greg gets to feel rewarded in his knowledge that his frog is special, Jason gets to sing a song after being silent throughout the series, and Beatrice seems, for now, to come to a sort of peace about things after several clear attempts to sidetrack the boys. This is the only episode to feature two major stories instead of one, but the steamer segment is rich enough to feel like a full episode. If only we could’ve stopped here.

All roads lead to Twain when it comes to depictions of steamboats as a go-to American icon, which is why he preceded this discussion of Lullaby in Frogland: I’m not claiming Mickey Mouse wouldn’t have been successful if his first cartoon was about something else, but I’m certainly claiming that we wouldn’t have gotten Steamboat Willie as it was if Ub Iwerks hadn’t grown up in a Missouri whose lore was shaped by Twain’s tales of the river. But while the author is the root of the episode’s many influences, I think the most fascinating branch that we borrow from is The Princess and the Frog.

2009 was a great year for animation, seeing the release of Coraline, Fantastic Mr. Fox, The Secret of Kells, the surprisingly great Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, and the first ten minutes of Up (also the rest of Up, if I’m feeling generous). The first two on that list are my favorite of the year, twin stop-motion masterpieces that I’m always in the mood to watch, but The Princess and the Frog is a brilliant last gasp from Disney’s 2D animation studio. It isn’t the final traditionally animated film they made (that would be 2011′s Winnie the Pooh), nor the final fully sincere princess movie they made (that would be 2010′s Tangled), but it marks the beginning of the end for both trends: for better and worse, modern Disney animation feels the need to loudly subvert old tropes and wouldn’t be caught dead in two dimensions.

Lullaby in Frogland’s connection to The Princess and the Frog is certainly visible on the surface level: both feature a long sequence starring frogs on a steamboat where a lead character must pretend to be another animal and play a woodwind instrument to get out of a jam, and both involve our heroes seeking help from a wise woman far from civilization (even if only one of these women is actually helpful). But it’s the somber nostalgia factor that binds these stories closer than anything, the knowledge that this is the end of the road for this type of tale. The ferry’s gotta land somewhere, and the cold is setting in as the frogs begin hibernating for the winter, but there’s still more story to tell.

The second story of Lullaby in Frogland is scored throughout by a haunting string and piano rendition of Adelaide Parade, and Adelaide herself is immediately captivating. John Cleese returns for the second episode in a row, but as both of these episodes aired the same night, it feels like a consistent through-line: in the first half, he’s an eccentric who might be a deranged maniac but is actually harmless, and now he’s a witch who might be harmless but is actually a deranged maniac.

Adelaide gets a compelling amount of detail for someone who’s barely in the show. We don’t get any explanation about her fatal weakness to...fresh air? Coldness in general? Either way, like the Wicked Witch of the West’s lethal reaction to water, it’s absurd that someone like her has managed to live this long. She never says what she needs a child servant for, why she has scissors that seem custom-made for Beatrice’s specific curse, or what her spider-like deal with yarn and wool is (she has a black widow hourglass on her back, but also reminds me of the Greek Fates with her emphasis on thread). We never find out how she’s connected to the Beast, whose theme bleeds into her music as she proclaims, without much prompting, that she follows his commands; her goal of using children as zombie slaves seems counter to his goal of turning them into trees to fuel his soul lantern. But this blend of unexplained characteristics and seemingly inconsistent motives only makes her more enthralling to me, because she feels like the major villain of another story who just happens to intersect with ours.

What makes Adelaide even more compelling on rewatch is that her scissors, despite their gruesome method for curing the curse, do end up working. Which means she did mean to help Beatrice out as part of the deal. At no point does Adelaide lie, and given Beatrice knows she’s bad news as she lures the brothers in, it becomes clear that for all her villainy, Adelaide is an honest witch. I’m always down for baddies that tell the truth, but it’s of particular interest when we compare her to the Beast, whose whole deal is lying.

The only liar in this episode is Beatrice, even if she wanted to set things straight without hurting anyone; she values her friendship with the boys so much now that she’d rather make herself a servant to Adelaide than just tell them she’s dangerous and reveal that she lied. By the time she’s willing to tell the truth, it’s too late, and not even saving Greg and Wirt by killing Adelaide is enough for Wirt to forgive her. Considering he knows in The Unknown that the scissors he uses to escape the yarn can save her family, he was also listening in on the end of the conversation before entering the house, which means he must have heard that she was willing to sacrifice herself, but that doesn’t matter either. Beatrice gave the boys hope, and no matter how badly she tried to stop it, the encounter with Adelaide transforms Wirt. Where he was once nervous and unsure, and was then briefly optimistic, he’s now sullen and untrusting.

But again, in comes Jason Funderburker, croaking and hopping on all fours once more to bring some light to the darkening series. He doesn’t do much for Wirt, but allows Greg to quickly get over whatever trauma he had about getting webbed up in yarn; he’s remarkably quiet about it, but it’s important to remember that he was betrayed, too. Whether he doesn’t understand exactly what happened or is just quicker to forgive, Greg is fine with Beatrice, allowing us to focus harder on Wirt’s reaction from now on.

It’s all rain and winter for Wirt until the end of his adventure. But the show isn’t content to leave him even slightly forlorn: when it gets too dark, he has a frog to swallow a lantern to light the way, and when it gets too cold, he has a brother to cover him in leaves, and when he falls, he has Beatrice to help pull him back up. Even the Woodsman tries to save him in his own way (talk about folks who are bad at communication). Bad things happen, and people make mistakes, but the bigger mistake is allowing that to close you off to others, or to never forgive friends that are genuinely sorry. Our heroes have taken the ferry to the other side, and now the story can shift to one about the folly of abandoning all hope.

Where have we come, and where shall we end?

On top of Jason Funderberker, who’s set up as a major rival to make his eventual reveal one of the show’s best jokes, Wirt gives Beatrice a general summary of Into the Unknown three episodes before we see it play out.

#lullaby in frogland #over the garden wall #otgw #steven universally #mark twain #the princess and the frog

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jawnjendes · 5 years

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i’m tired too | shawn mendes

university au summer vacay babey, shawn x goth gf

*******just letting yall know that the chapter before this, girl you’re trouble did not appear in the tags when i posted it, so if u havent read it go ahead and do that now :P

masterlist | series playlist

My tongue was between my teeth as I focused on my reflection in my little compact mirror. Carefully, I filled in my eyebrow with dark brown powder, ignoring the people sitting on either side of me on the couch. Having two sets of eyes on me made it hard to carve out the enhanced version of my face, though. I tried to shift in my seat to get them to focus on literally anything else, but neither of them let up.

“She’s so good at that,” Mom said in admiration. She was sitting on my left.

“Isn’t she?” Shawn agreed in the same tone. He was on my right.

I paused and sighed. The previous evening, Aaliyah pointed out that my mom and her brother had some uncanny similarities. I thought she was just bringing light to the fact that they both… adore me. But they had the same mannerisms, like talking with their hands. They were both optimistic as well, unlike me… and my dad. I pretended not to see any similarities until now. I was just glad Aaliyah wasn’t here now to triumph in her discovery.

“Are you guys gonna do this the whole time?” I asked, looking back and forth between the two of them.

“Well, you’re so pretty,” Shawn said, bringing a hand up to stroke my cheek.

I leaned away from his touch. “I just did my foundation!”

My mom laughed. “She won’t let you touch her either! I’m glad it’s not just me!”

Shawn gave me a surprised look. He learned just a little too much about me in the last twenty four hours, and it wasn’t stopping anytime soon.

Luckily, my dad, who had been scrolling through his phone on the other side of the couch, piped up. “Shawn, I heard you play guitar?”

That started the music conversation. I was glad to have the attention off of me for once, all anyone asked me about these days was my stupid hospital stay. Plus, I could finish my makeup in peace. Not to mention, Shawn was still convulsing and crying in his sleep, so things were… not ideal at the moment. But he got to talk about his love of music, which was something my dad could relate to.

“You know, I used to be in a rock band,” he said. “Back in eighty-seven, me and my buddies played shows from my parents’ garage. That’s how I met Lucy. She was standing at the front of the audience for every show. We only had about ten people attend if we were lucky, but she was always there.”

Mom placed her hands over her chest fondly. “I think music has a beautiful way of bringing people together.”

You wouldn’t be able to tell just by looking at my mother, but she lived for heavy metal. She was the one who introduced me to the symphonic metal bands I listen to now.

“Oh, a hundred percent,” Shawn agreed. Then he told me parents that he and I met at one of his shows at a coffee shop.

Today was much more calm than the last. My parents slept on it, and they decided that they were just happy that I was live. I was just glad they stayed at a hotel, too. I couldn’t imagine being holed up with them after not living with them for a majority of two years. I also wouldn’t know how to explain why my boyfriend was yelling in his sleep every hour.

I really did miss my mom and dad. It kicked in when they had to go home at the end of the week. I was supposed to be home too. None of this was supposed to happen this way.

After my parents were gone, I was able to get around the apartment by myself. I didn’t need a babysitter anymore, so I tried to be happy about that. However, my incisions still kept me from doing anything strenuous, which meant I had no excuse not to return to work anymore. Most of what I did was sit behind a desk in a tiny office, so I made my first day back that Friday. I figured I might as well make some type of income to, you know, pay for my books for the next semester and uhhhhhh fucking live. I had to find my independence again somehow.

Anyway, my first day back at work was as mundane as it always was. It was like I wasn’t even gone for three weeks. Stacy gave me a professional “welcome back” and then hit me with the work I missed that I needed to catch up on. I spent the morning adding up gas receipts, entering vehicle information into the computer, and booking service appointments over the phone.

In the afternoon, Jason and Luca came in for their shifts. They approached the window of the office and stopped in their tracks.

“You’re here?” Jason asked in disbelief. “Weren’t you quitting?”

Clearly, no one knew or cared where I had been lately. I mean, I must have told Stacy to keep it confidential while I was high on morphine. Even then, I wasn’t exactly popular here.

“I had surgery, and now I can’t hop on a plane home,” I explained shortly.

“Oh, so you were dying and you weren’t planning on telling us?” Luca said, holding a hand up to my face in a dramatic fashion. “How dare you.”

I blinked once and then got back to adding numbers from the stack of receipts. The two of them entered the office, and that was when another question popped into my mind.

“Who covered me while I was gone?”

“Not me!” Jason said as he went to his desk at the back of the office.

Luca stood by mine and puckered his lips like he was thinking to himself. That said it all for me.

“Shoulda known.” I rolled my eyes. “Not a goddamn thing was done, and it’s month-end.”

“Hey, Stacy told me to book appointments,” Luca said defensively. “I lost commission these last few weeks because of that. I sell cars. I’m no receptionist.”

Bet he didn’t even book appointments either. Bet Stacy told him to cover all of my responsibilities. Luca just did not give a flying fuck about anything.

I spent my lunch hour in the car. Normally, Shawn would have come to meet me so we could eat together… or not eat. He was working too, though, and from the texts he sent me, he had been working on a flower arrangement for a wedding. He was going to be busy all day. When did we become a boring, married couple?

“You’ll never believe who they put to cover me while I was out,” I typed out in a text to Shawn. I munched on my white rice as I sent it.

“Who?!” he replied within a few minutes. I could almost hear the enthusiasm.

“Fucking Luca. He did fuck all, so I have a bunch to catch up on. Plus, it’s the end of the month, so we all have to close a bunch of sales and warranties and all this other boring crap. I’ll be home a little late.” Send. More white rice. God, I’m tired of rice.

My phone buzzed again while I was scrolling on Instagram. Shawn had replied. “Aw. Ok hon. I’m gonna have a couple of friends over tonight, just letting you know. Some of them want to see how you’re doing.”

“Ok. I’ll see you at home.”

“Love that you see my place as a home now :)”

Uhhhhhhhhh… Who’s gonna tell him? Who has to remind him that I was staying at his place for convenience, because I am recovering from a surgery? That I literally almost died and my complications kept me from travelling long distance…? Who’s gonna tell him?

I was horrifically fatigued when I got home. I seemed to have forgotten that stressing over numbers and annoying phone calls was mentally straining. Maybe travelling by car wasn’t a great idea either, but how could I not drive? I had a job to go to. I had an apartment to get back to. As I walked up to the front door, I wished that I didn’t have to worry about things like income and bills to pay. I just wanted to lie down and not get up again.

Walking into the apartment, I realized I probably wouldn’t even get to do that.

First of all, the door was unlocked. Shawn had given me a key, but apparently I didn’t need it this time. I was met with music and laughter as stepped over the threshold. I found people, strangers, when I peered into the kitchen.

It was a small kitchen, but there were five frat boy looking guys all holding plastic red cups. Among them were three breathtakingly pretty brunettes. I’m talking Instagram models, wearing sparkling crop tops and skin tight leggings. They were all laughing about something until they saw me at the doorway.

“Rock on, emo queen,” one of the frat boys said, holding up the rock and roll sign.

Yeah. Even in my work uniform, which was a button up with the company name on, was in fact black. Not to mention, the eyeliner I had put on in the morning smudged so much throughout the day that I now looking like a raccoon having a mental breakdown.

Awkwardly, I continued padding down the hall, finding more people standing and talking amongst themselves. Again, more ridiculously pretty girls and their dates. All I could smell was weed. I tried to keep a stink eye off my face, but it was the only thing that made people move out of the way so I could get to the living room.

Finally, there were people I recognized. Brian, Connor, Teddy, and Shawn were among a bigger group of strangers sat on the L-shaped couch. So this was a couple of friends?

Shawn noticed me first and raised his arms in the air, making me notice the red cup in his hand. “Look who’s here!”

That caused several pairs of eyes to turn to me, causing me to feign a smile. Everyone raised their drinks and cheered. Oh god, I was in a room of drunk toddlers. I was in a whole ass apartment of drunk toddlers. And my fucking boyfriend was the toddler hosting the other toddlers.

“Come, sit here,” Shawn said, waving me over. “I missed you!”

I still felt awkward and tired and far from the vibe everyone else was currently on. I stepped over and went to take the empty space next to Shawn, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me onto his lap. My face went hot at the gesture, but not because of the affection, or the fact that he chose to rest his hands on top of my thighs. His chin rested on my shoulder, and I could smell the alcohol in his breath. Oh jeez.

“Man, let your girl breathe!” Brian joked, seeing the discomfort on my face.

“It’s fine,” I said sheepishly. I noticed several empty plastic cups and shot glasses on the coffee table. It wasn’t even ten o’clock yet.

“Yeah,” Shawn agreed, “I mean, I’d sit on her lap, but my poor baby had surgery. Wouldn’t wanna hurt her.”

Before I could retort, Teddy spoke up. She, too, had her own cup and was very obviously under the influence. “Oh yeah! How did that go? What even happened?”

I was going to reluctantly explain, but Shawn spoke for me again.

“My little fighter looked death in the face and said ‘fuck you!’”

Several gasps and fascinated expressions came from the group on the couch. I resisted the urge to plant my face in my hands. There goes my business, out in the open for everyone to put their noses into.

“You almost died?” Connor asked in shock.

“Ooh, story time!” Teddy announced. “Spill! Now!”

Been home for ten minutes, and I was not in my pajamas lying under the covers. For me, this was a couple of steps away from a worst case scenario. All eyes on me, expected to talk about things I wanted to keep quiet about. And it was all prompted by my drunk boyfriend, of all people.

“I had a bowel resection, and then I hemorrhaged,” I explained curtly. Then, I moved Shawn’s hands off my thighs and got to my feet. “And now I have to stay here and recover for the whole summer. The end.”

Some people booed at the length of my story. I’m sure I was expected to tell an awesome tale about the battle against my infected guts, but I was really not in the mood for that. I had to tell the story twice at work, and that was enough for me. I didn’t really care about being a massive party pooper at the moment.

“Baby, where you going?” asked Shawn as I stepped away from the group.

I sighed and turned back to him. “I’m gonna change out of my uniform, and then I’m going to sleep.”

He pouted and got up to approach me. He came up close, so things felt a little more private. “Come have fun with me. We never have fun anymore.”

The plea in his voice was a jab straight to the heart. But I couldn’t find it in me to change my mind and stay with him.

“I’m not really in a party mood,” I said apologetically. “I had a long day, I’m really tired.”

Shawn’s face fell even more. His hazy, tipsy eyes filled with concern. “You want me to kick everyone out? I’ll do it! I’ll do it right now!”

I quickly got ahold of his wrist before he could rally the troops. I already had enough guilt on my shoulders. “No! No, no, no, don’t do that.” I held his hand in both of mine, and I ran my fingers over the swallow tattoo. “Have fun with your friends. You’re right, things haven’t been fun lately, and I’m sorry for that. You deserve a good time, even if I’m not there. Just have a drink for me, okay?”

He could have put out some things about how the party would be better if I was there. He could have sweet talked me into sitting on his lap again for the whole night. Instead, he squeezed my hand and said, “Straight tequila, right?”

Relief washed over me. “Yes. Remember to drink water too.”

“I gotchu, honey.” Then, he leaned in a pressed a sweet kiss to my lips. “Keep the bed warm for me.”

The taste of alcohol on his lips made me one percent more likely to join him in the festivities. The other ninety nine percent yeeted my ass to the bedroom. Once I was alone, the crushing feeling of deliberate isolation sent me to the surface of the bed.

I was the type of tired that kept me from actually sleeping. I could sleep through plenty of external noise, living in a college dorm was enough experience. It was just my foggy brain and burning throat getting in the way. I grabbed my Switch from the nightstand and played Smash Bros, tuning out the sounds of people having a better time than me.

Every so often, I heard people cheering or chanting, “chug, chug, chug!” I remained curled up in bed, fighting people online to get my frustrations out. Taylor Swift’s Love Story came on around 1AM and everyone screamed the lyrics, while I brought my t-shirt to the bridge of my nose to catch oncoming tears. I felt guilty and selfish every moment I wished Shawn was here to spoon me til I fell asleep. He spent so much time worrying about me, he deserved to forget it all once in a while. God knows I wanted to do the same, but my insides were still recovering.

I had put my Switch away and I was lying on my side by the time people were saying their goodbyes out in the apartment. Some guy was praising Shawn for having such “epic parties” as they put it. Weird, this was the first party of his that I witnessed. We’ve been together just over six months. How much of himself was he holding back because of me?

“Whoo!” I heard Shawn yell, followed by a glass shattering loudly.

The sound woke me up a little. Meaning, my legs got me standing and dashing out to the living room. My eyes scanned the place, which was now vacant of people and full of trash, but I found Shawn sitting on the floor just outside the hallway.

The place was a mess. Half empty cups, food, and mysterious stains covered every surface in the apartment. I was only worried about my boyfriend.

“Hey, cutie,” I said affectionately, bending down so we were at eye level.

Shawn’s eyes were hooded, but sparkling. He gave me a toothy grin and held up a peace sign.

Then, Teddy emerged from the kitchen. “Oh, did I wake you? I dropped a cup, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I wasn’t exactly sleeping,” I told her, still looking at Shawn. I waved my hand in front of his face, only for him to blink slowly. “Uh, how much has he had to drink?”

Teddy chewed her lip as she thought about it. “I lost count after his fourth shot.”

“My girlfriend told me to have ten tequilas,” Shawn slurred, belching right after. “I think I had like, six.”

I held my breath and waved off the stench. Someone was in for a long night, longer than normal. I didn’t think he would take me seriously, but then again, I did not tell him to have ten shots of straight tequila.

“Oh yeah, he mixed his liquor too,” Teddy said.

I sighed and moved Shawn’s long arm over my shoulders. “Okay, vamos mi chulo. Let’s get you to bed.”

Teddy stepped in to help get the six foot toddler to his feet. Shawn stumbled and swayed, his long arms hanging heavily on our shoulders. I baby talked him as we slowly strolled to the bedroom, and I told Teddy I could take it from there.

Shawn burped again as we got closer to the bed, and he groaned. “Ugh… this isn’t fun anymore.”

“Okay, let’s go to the bathroom,” I said, steering him the other way.

It took a minute to get him positioned in front of the toilet. It took less than a second for him to lean over the bowl and return everything he drank. As much as the sights and sounds of vomiting brought me dark and lonely flashbacks, I went and sat on the edge of the bathtub. I rubbed Shawn’s back and practically waited for it to end.

Once that was overwith, I really couldn’t go back to sleep. I managed to lay Shawn down on the mattress. The sparkle in his eyes was gone, now replaced with chilling emptiness. I took the liberty of pulling his leather boots off his feet, and I removed his socks as well. Then, I draped the comforter over his long body.

“Stay with me,” Shawn mumbled, his arm reaching out to me. “Let’s forget all the bad shit…”

It seems that no amount of alcohol could make him not think about the last couple of weeks. My heart began to ache all over again.

“Go to sleep, okay?” I said gently. “I’ll be with you when you go to sleep.”

Shawn whined. “You always die in my sleep. I love you too much to let you go.”

I had a feeling that that’s what he had been dreaming about. But I really could not get myself to lie down with him. I was too antsy from the vomiting.

“Wait for me, okay?” I told him, stroking his hair. “I’m only gonna be a few minutes, and I’ll come back.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

He’s drunk. He’s going to sleep no matter what.

Once Shawn was all tucked into bed, I left the room and quietly shut the door behind me. In the living room, Teddy was picking up plastic cups and shoving them into a giant trash bag. I really wasn’t expecting her to still be here. Wordlessly, I began helping her clean up. Anything to get my beating heart to slow down.

“What were you doing this whole time if you weren’t sleeping?” she asked me. “Was the music too loud?”

“No. It wasn’t anything from the party,” I replied, scooping up paper plates and used napkins. “Just had a long day. I wasn’t in the mood for a party.”

“Oh.”

She glanced at me a couple of times as she dumped more trash into the bag. This was supposed to be the part where I bare my soul to my boyfriend’s friend and make her my friend, but… Enough of my business was out there already.

Teddy, however, was persistent. “So, how come you didn’t want visitors at the hospital? Or when you got out, for that matter?”

I busied myself with fixing the sofa cushions so I could come up with a decent answer. “Uh, I like my privacy. Especially in moments where things are messy.”

“Hm. Well, aren’t messy moments the times when you need friends the most?”

That thought lingered in the air as we continued tidying up the living room. I could have had my video game club friends there, or Shawn’s friends, but instead I left most of the burden to Shawn himself. What kind of a person am I?

At last, Teddy got the last of the garbage in the bag, and she tied it shut. Then, we moved onto the kitchen. More cups, spilled booze, and the broken glass from earlier. Oh, how I did not miss house parties. I was at the prime age of partying, being 21. I should have been the type to be as drunk as my boyfriend was, to just have fun and forget the stresses of life. But I found myself on a completely different level than the people who were here tonight.

“Do you stay up late often?” Teddy asked, trying to fill the silence yet again.

We both paused as the sounds of loud, monotonous humming came from the bedroom. Teddy scrunched her brow and tilted her head. My shoulders tensed with chills, like ice cold water had been spilled down the back of my shirt.

“To answer your question,” I told her, “yes.”

She followed me to the room, but she stayed at the doorway while I went to Shawn’s quivering body.

“Baby, wake up,” I said urgently, shaking his arm. “Wake up, it’s only a dream, baby…”

He was on his back, head moving from side to side in harsh moments. He groaned, completely spastic, so I coaxed him some more.

My voice shook. “Shawn… please. I’m here, please-”

His eyes flew open with a loud gasp. He sat up, breathing hard and fast. I placed my hands on his broad shoulders, getting his attention.

“Hey, look at me. You’re okay, it’s okay. You’re safe.”

Brown eyes were wide with panic, and then sadness. Within a second, they were filling with tears, and Shawn was wrapping his arms around my waist. With a shaky sob, he buried his head in my neck and cried quietly.

I had a pained looked on my face while he wasn’t looking. I just held him and stroked his hair. I was whispering the things I always said when he was in this state. “You’re safe with me. It was just a dream, it’s not real.”

I was able to coax him back to sleep for the time being. It was only going to happen again, though. I didn’t know how to stop it from happening.

When I stepped out of the room again, I leaned against the wall by the doorway. Teddy was gone, probably fled the uncomfortable situation. Can’t say I blame her. I sighed heavily and brought the palms of my hands to my misty eyes. I was beyond exhausted now. I was at a loss.

A hand went on my shoulder all of a sudden, making me jump. I looked up, finding that Teddy was still here, glass of water in her hand. Her blue eyes were concerned and upset, like the world had just ended in front of her. I pushed past the feelings, though.

“Sorry, I didn’t know you were still here,” I said, my voice thick with emotion. “Uh, did you need a ride home?”

She shook her head and held up the glass. “My fiance is coming soon. Here, drink.”

I offered a weak smile and accepted the gesture. As I sipped, Teddy said something that threw me off.

“He told me he was handling his nightmares. Had it all taken care of.”

“Why would he say that?” I asked in return.

“Didn’t want anyone to worry, I’m guessing. But I can see how tired he is. I can see how shaken up he is. I mean, he never goes as hard as he did tonight with the liquor. And worst of all, he hasn’t written a song in weeks. He hasn’t been in the studio at all.”

And it was my own damn fault.

“Does he tell you what he dreams about?” I dared to ask.

“No,” Teddy said. “I don’t think he tells anybody. I think he needs something beyond our help.”

“You’re right. I need to talk to him about this, because I know he’s not gonna talk to me.”

She placed her both her hands on my shoulders. “Hey. I’ve seen Shawn with quite a few girls over the last couple of years. I’ve never seen him head over heels until you came along. He loves you so much, he can’t fathom the idea of losing you. He loves you so much that he won’t talk to you about this because he doesn’t want you to feel bad.”

I wasn’t sure if that was supposed to make me feel better, because I was barely coherent as I spoke. “I already do…”

For once, I was up and running before Shawn was. His last nightmare happened around six in the morning, and after that he slept normally. The hangover probably had something to do with that. I left him a glass of water and painkillers on the nightstand, and then I went to the kitchen to attempt a type of breakfast.

By the time had eggs scrambled on a plate, Shawn was stumbling out of the room, glass of water in hand. He rubbed his eyes and yawned, and then he ran his fingers through his curly hair. He was still in the navy blue t-shirt he wore last night, but he ditched his jeans and went for the underwear look.

I met him halfway from the kitchen, presenting him with his mediocre breakfast. “Morning, sunshine.”

“For me?” he asked, and I nodded. “You’re the best.”

He sat at the round glass dining table as opposed to going to the living room. He must have been really hungover. I sat next to him and basked in the silence as he ate. My hands were tingling from the nerves.

“How ya feelin’?” I asked in a stupidly gently voice, reaching over to rub his arm.

He hummed through a mouthful of eggs. When he swallowed, he spoke. “My head is pounding. But I took the pills you left for me. Thank you for that, by the way. Who cleaned the apartment?”

“Me and Teddy. After you knocked out, we just decided to tidy up so no one had to worry about it the next day.”

“Well, thank you. One less thing to worry about.” He ate in silence some more, and then spoke some words that truly had me puzzled. “I slept the whole night for once. Feels good.”

Must be nice to not remember your night terrors. However, I had to tell him.

“Shawn…” I said slowly. “You woke up like five times. You had a panic attack one of those times.”

He slowed his chewing, staring at the table top in thought. He stayed quiet, and it freaked me out. He practically shut down, and it scared me for multiple reasons.

“I don’t know how to help you,” I admitted, watching him carefully.

“It’ll wear off,” he said weakly.

“You don’t know that.” I had to be firm. “I don’t know what you’re seeing in your sleep, but I know it scares you so much that you won’t talk about it. And you talk about everything, so that’s how I know it’s bad.”

Shawn looked down, still silent. Not giving me a possible solution to this. Does he even want help? Or am I just exaggerating and losing my mind?

“You don’t have to talk to me about it,” I continued. “Just talk to somebody. Last night, Teddy told me that you were taking care of all of this, but you’re not. I don’t know how you’re functioning during the day, because I’ve been exhausted and sleep deprived. I know you are too, and I’m not the only one who sees it. I, I don’t know how much longer I can watch you go through this.”

Again, he was quiet. He was never quiet. Shawn was feisty and passionate, ready to say anything to prove his point at any given moment. He had strayed from the Shawn Mendes I loved in such a short amount of time. It was happening so fast, watching him slip through my fingers. It felt like I was the one in a nightmare.

“Please,” I mumbled, my voice quavering. My bottom lip began to quiver.

Shawn suddenly looked up at me, eyes wide at the sounds coming out of me. Even when he was sinking, he still paid more attention when I was about to cry.

“I’ll, I’ll give you my therapist’s number,” I offered, losing my composure. “I-I don’t know if she’s taking anymore clients, but I-I-I’ll give up my sessions for you. I’ll do anything if it means you’ll get some help. Shawn, I… I’m begging you. I’m begging you to get help, because I don’t know what to do anymore… a-and it’s because of me why you’re like this, a-a-and I’m sorry-”

I gasped when I realized Shawn had placed his hands on either side of my face. His thumbs rubbed my tear stricken cheeks, and he spoke calmly and gently.

“Okay,” he said. “Okay, I’ll get help. I promise. I don’t wanna go through this anymore either. I promise I’ll figure this out.”

I guess that’s how I knew I was falling in love. The want and need for him to be okay was so great, there was nothing I wouldn’t do to make that happen. The fact that he was not okay was ripping me a new one. I couldn’t even breathe when he slept. I couldn’t even think about how much I wanted to be in California, because then I’d have to think about leaving Shawn all alone. Who would talk him down from his night terrors?

My hospital stay alone triggered nightmares and eerie silence from him. But what would Shawn have done if I had died altogether?

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes smut #fourtristattoosspring #shawn x goth gf #if this doesnt show up in the tags imma fuckin riot #im jk ill just cry again probably #i may have cried writing this lulz

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i-am-masterkittens · 4 years

Note

You better prepare yourself cause these are Quite A Few Questions 👀👀 3, 4, 11, 12, 15, 21, 23, 31, 33, 39 and lastly 40. Wow. 11 questions lmao

Thank you so much 😭😭❤

3. rant. just do it (I am going to put my whole ass rant under the cut because BOY IS IT LENGTHY. Also tw child abuse, pedophilia, self-harm and I think that’s it.)

4. do you think its ok to separate the artist from the art? No? Like I guess if you want to, that’s fine, I’m not gonna hate you for it, but for me personally I’m gonna try to avoid it as much as possible. If a bad person creates a masterpiece, I’m still not gonna support them.

11. what unusual talent do you have? Uhh mild body contortion? Like I can’t touch my toes for the life of me but I can twist my body really weirdly and bend all my fingertips backwards by a lot. I love freaking people out by doing that.

12. what’s the most interesting schools gossip you’ve ever heard? I have audio-based problems meaning I have trouble understanding someone when they speak and also remembering what they said, so I can eavesdrop on the juiciest gossip and forget the next day. However, I do remember this one thing about some kid named Evan being a vampire, which I distinctly remember because Jake talked about it, but I don’t remember how it came up.

15. what’s a question do you constantly get asked? One would think it would be “omg are you left handed?” Or something similar, but I don’t think anyone’s ever asked me about it. One question I do get a lot is from my boyfriend, “why are you so cute?” It makes me shy and I have to hide my face.

21. what’s a conspiracy you believe in? That there are Warrior cats living somewhere in the world (from the warrior series). Which I guess isn’t a conspiracy, but I believe in it!

23. if you could break one of your bad habits which would you choose? The inability to take care of myself. I mean, if someone wasn’t there to remind me every day, I would never remember to take my medicine, or brush my teeth before bed, or even get dressed half the days. I wouldn’t call it lazy, it’s more of a “I’m too tired to take care of myself”. That’s mental illness for you babey!!

31. you can change one thing in your life right now. what are you changing? OH. I would totally delete every disease in the world. This whole quarantine thing is making me sick physically, emotionally, and mentally, because I am not allowed outside at all and the lack of fresh air, meeting people, and vitamin D is stressing me out and well I feel bad almost all the time now. Not to mention all the cool stuff I was gonna do for my 2020 graduation. 😔

33. what do you think about a lot I sometimes wonder if my best friend would let me call him Jakey or Jakie as a nickname but I’m too shy to ask because I am baby.

39. describe your asthetic Okay so I call it “Pretty-Cryptid, Baby-Softcore.” Because I am baby AND a cryptid. I’ll be eating baby carrots from the bag and staring out the window one minute then I’ll want to be snuggled under lots of blankets the next. I also really love pretty things and colors. Pastel purples and blues? Hell yeah! Pats on the head? I love you. A demon with ethereal vibes and pretty jewelry is standing next to me in bed and telling me everything’s going to be okay? OGHOHOHHHHGH ❤❤❤❤ Anyway I want a pretty monster dad, please?

40. answer with one of your ‘school memes’ (inside jokes you have with your class/grade) with no explanation Mr. Wise.

Here’s my rant:

The basis of it all is just that I would probably sleep forever if I could.

I guess that isn’t all quite a rant, so I’ll start of on a mild note. What the fuck is happening to my dreams? I’ve been having these weird ass dreams about people taking care of me and genuinely wanting to become a parental figure to me. They all wear masks, two of which look exactly like SCP-035 and SCP-049, but there’s this one dude, I don’t know him, but he wears this mask with holes in it. Apparently his name is Jason? This isn’t the first time I’ve had a dream about someone who I didn’t know existed, I’ve also had dreams about Monika from DDLC before I knew who she was, and even about how she died. It was creepy as fuck, and I sure hope my dreams don’t come true because I’ve had dreams of the future more than once.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get into the heavy stuff, starting with my parents.I know I’m not the only person to have shitty parents, but that doesn’t stop them from being shitty. And before I get into anything, please please, please don’t report them to anyone. It’s probably weird to hear considering all they’ve done, but the guilt will probably kill me literally, and I still kinda love them, I mean they’re my parents and they took care of me. I don’t want anything to happen to them, and I don’t want to have to hurt myself because I did something to them, even if it was indirectly.

It used to be physical abuse, but it’s evolved into verbal as I grew up. Whenever I used to get in trouble, I would get so fucking terrified of what was going to happen to me. My dad, who was mostly absent from my life, (hence my constant wishing for a fictional character to be my dad, and probably a HUGE factor for what’s happening to my dreams lately) was also the most heavy handed with the hitting. He would spank me so hard that I would be crying and my butt would be red for hours. And it was so SO obvious that he liked my sister more than me, because it was always me who ended up with the red butts, and she’d get away with a loud yelling at. Meanwhile my mom would just hit me wherever she could with whatever she could, including a wire coat hanger when she was doing laundry.

And I recognize that I was a problem child, both physically and mentally because of my internal deformities that cause a lot of health problems, but also my weird boyish mentality and energy (I was into roughhousing a lot). But even then, just yelling would be enough to make me stop. Hitting me the way they did only made me learn how to lie to them and hide when I did something wrong.

This sort of stuff went on until about middle school, where it turned into more verbal threats about kicking me out of the house, as well as calling me names and making comments that dropped my self esteem very low, including stupid cow, bitch, and even telling me to hide my body and never wear bikinis or short shorts or crop tops (which I was already sensitive enough about because of my scars and the bump in my abdomen because of my knotted intestines, which gives me digestive issues if I eat too much). Dad almost completely dropped off the disciplinary train, only yelling at me extremely loudly when he got angry, but other than that I did pretty much nothing with him.

Because of them I’ve become extremely paranoid when it comes to touches that aren’t meant to be 100% comforting, and I’ve never been able to fully trust anyone for fear of getting hurt, (I’m sorry Jake :( if it makes you feel better though I trust you the most out of anyone else) and I get nervous when speaking up because I always got shot down by my parents.

It’ll be okay though because I have my boyfriend who I’ll get to live with soon, even if it’s just for the summer.

This isn’t everything that they’ve done, but it’s the majority of it, and even though they do good stuff with me sometimes, like my dad cooks breakfast or takes us out to eat, or we all go on nice vacations together, and it makes me feel guilty that I’m making them look bad, and worry that I’m oversharing or being too sensitive, but then I remember what they do and have done, and remind myself that I’ll only visit during holidays.

When I was 13, I came into contact with a pedophile. My first one out of at least 2 that I remember. I’m going to spare the details, but he tried to roleplay sexual situations with him, and convince me to undress in front of him, and that’s when I cut contact with him, and faked my death. I’m so, SO fucking sick of pedos, and pedo apologists, saying there’s nothing wrong with the age difference, when pedophilia has done nothing good to or for children. It gave me severe PTSD, to the point that I can’t say any words relating to reproduction, and visual-based sexual content will cause me to have flashbacks and panic attacks and cause me to scratch myself. Thanks pedos! Fucking hate you all! Please die.

And before people say I am overreacting, I’ve had this huge trigger since I was 13 and that is not something a kid should go through. And the reason why not a lot of people know about what happened, it’s because of the fear that I harbored, that people would laugh at me, and might use my triggers against me, which made things even worse, and it wasn’t until my boyfriend triggered me (accidentally) that I finally told someone, and it made me feel better that I could rely on him.

Other than that, another rant is about my boyfriend. I mean, he’s a good boyfriend, and he’s nice, but sometimes he comes off as insensitive and it makes me upset. That’s most of the reasons why we fight. Another big thing is lack of affection/attention, which might seems strange since we’re always hanging out, it seems, and cuddling, but sometimes he falls asleep on me and I get bored and don’t know what to do, or sometimes he ignores me to play video games or talk to other people. I am very touch starved so I need constant attention and contact or else I get worried, and I don’t know if he knows this or not, but he definitely comes off as ignorant sometimes.

He makes up for a lot of stuff he does, but it doesn’t make what he did go away, and I wish he’d realize that and change because he keeps making the same mistakes.

My last rant is going to be about myself, and that I feel like a shit person! I feel like I always make things worse! I feel bad for every decision I make! I feel like I’m too clingy to my boyfriend and that I ask too much of him sometimes, and it makes me feel like shit because what I want and how I feel afterwards are different things and wow! Time for scratches! Also I want to have the power to always know what to do and say to make everyone happier and feel better! But then I get scared I’m gonna make a mistake and instead of trying to help I ignore them and go wow! I am a very shit person for ignoring them! And now my heart hurts because I got another heart palpitation by panicking! Wow I have a shit body! My heart deformities might kill me in my sleep! Wow! I am so insecure about everything I do and every way I look. I just want to become small and disappear sometimes. I miss you Jake. It’s hard for me to tell you I love you because it’s such an intimate phrase and my boyfriend was the first to hear it from me. But I’m glad you’re the second, even though we were so close to it. Somewhere in an alternate universe we’re together, and that makes me happy. I hope I we can become platonically intimate again, I remember holding your hand at night and it made me feel a little bit better at that camp.

My body just always hurts. I have to take a lot of medicine, and between all my heart, lung, and intestinal issues, on top of all my mental issues, majority of which have gone undiagnosed because my mom is in denial and refuses to get me to any sort of therapy; all of that combined makes me tired constantly, and I just always have stress, and a little headache in the back of my head.

I’m still hurting a lot, but I hope to get better. I have lots of ideas for the future, and I want to complete them before I go. I hope I make it past 2020, with many of you in tow.

I’m so tired.

I’m sorry if I made you sad.

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fromtheringapron · 5 years

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WWE SummerSlam 2016

Date: August 21, 2016.

Location: The Barclay Center in Brooklyn, New York.

Attendance: 15,974

Commentary: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, and Corey Graves (Raw). Mauro Renallo, John “Bradshaw” Layfield, and David Otunga (SmackDown).

Results:

Kickoff Match: The Usos (Jimmy and Jey), The Hype Bros (Mojo Rawley and Zack Ryder), and American Alpha (Chad Gable and Jason Jordan) defeated Breezango (Fandango and Tyler Breeze), The Ascension (Konnor and Viktor), and The Vaudevillains (Simon Gotch and Aiden English.

Kickoff Match: Sami Zayn and Neville defeated The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray and D-Von).

Kickoff Match, First in a Best of Seven Series: Sheamus defeated Cesaro.

1. Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens defeated Enzo Amore and Big Cass.

2. Raw Women’s Championship Match: Charlotte defeated Sasha Banks (champion) to win the title.

3. Intercontinental Championship Match: The Miz (champion) (with Maryse) defeated Apollo Crews.

4. AJ Styles defeated John Cena.

5. WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson defeated The New Day (Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods) (champions) via disqualification.

6. WWE Championship Match: Dean Ambrose (champion) defeated Dolph Ziggler.

7. Nikki Bella, Natalya, and Alexa Bliss defeated Naomi, Carmella, and Becky Lynch.

8. WWE Universal Championship Match: Finn Balor defeated Seth Rollins to become the inaugural champion.

9. Brock Lesnar (with Paul Heyman) defeated Randy Orton via knockout.

My Review

SummerSlam 2016 is one long ass show. I’m aware that’s a bit of a redundant statement because, in the age of the WWE Network, every show is long and, more often than not, they’re also ass. However, the point still stands: this show is a whopping 4 hours and it’s not something you can digest in one sitting on a rewatch. For the record, I totally support making the SummerSlams and Survivor Series and so on seem just as big and important as WrestleMania. It’s fine by me for WWE’s Big 4 to feature absolutely stacked cards. Unfortunately, in modern WWE, this approach also results in the shows running out of gas midway through and some of the matches going on way longer than they should. The 2016 edition of the summer classic isn’t exactly the worst example of this trend, but it definitely shows similar signs of fatigue.

On top of that, it’s such a heel-dominated show. It’s only occasionally satisfying. In their crusade to make the audience finally embrace Roman Reigns, the WWE would pile on the heel victories in hopes the crowd would pop like crazy once the Big Dog got the W in the main event. It’s inherently flawed psychology to think the crowd is just going to accept a long-awaited face win from just anybody. That can really only work in a particular situation. Needless to say, it often failed because while Roman would get the W, the crowd still hated him. Worse here is that he doesn’t even wrestle on this show. So who was this booking supposed to benefit? I guess you could make the argument for Finn Balor, whose Universal title win remains a highlight of his WWE tenure. Even then, it was rendered irrelevant 24 hours later, as Balor would vacate the title due to injury.

With all that in mind, it shouldn’t be surprising that such a heel-heavy show ends on a rather depressing note. Brock Lesnar pummels Randy Orton into a bloody mess and that’s it. That’s the show. Fade to black. It would’ve been fine if placed somewhere in the middle of the card, but it’s such an awkward way to close up shop. They did have a pretty workable story going into the match, and I’m not gonna pass up the rare occasion to see Orton get beaten into oblivion, but talk about deflating. The whole thing winds up looking like a pale imitation of Lesnar’s squash of John Cena back at SummerSlam 2014. Oh, and there’s some drama with Shane McMahon at the end because, as we all know, that’s exactly what the WWE needs: more McMahon family drama!

The far more successful dream match is John Cena vs AJ Styles. Truly something special. It’s essentially the same finishing move and near-fall spam fest that plagues every major WWE main event, but I don’t mind it here. This is meant to be an epic blockbuster between two of the biggest stars in wrestling of the post-Monday Night War era. It makes perfect sense for both guys to throw all of their deadliest ammunition at each other right out of the gate. Styles was in the midst of one of the hottest stretches of his career at this point, but Cena deserves just as much credit here. It’s kind of amazing. For all the times he’s proven that he can rise to the occasion in a big match situation, there are still anti-Cena bros to this day who’ll deny it every step of the way. His record of putting people over isn’t perfect, especially at SummerSlam, but what he does for AJ here is pretty selfless. I don’t think even his haters can deny that.

Overall, SummerSlam 2016 isn’t a bad show by any means but, again, the length ensures it will inevitably start to drag. A shame, because there’s probably a pretty good show somewhere in here. It’s nice that the WWE is trying to make the biggest party of the summer feel important, but too much partying can make even the most diehard fan eventually feel pooped.

My Random Notes

I can only imagine what someone like Jon Stewart really thinks of WWE’s comedy. I mean, he’s probably had plenty of experience doing his best with bad material, but you’d have to think he had to grin and bear it here at several points.

In light of Sasha Banks’ recent spat with the company, I can really see why she’d be frustrated with her booking. Would it have killed them to have her hold the Women’s title for longer than a month? I know an injury is cited as the official reason she dropped the belt here, but it’s still the first of several instances of them yanking the rug out from under her.

Man, Enzo and Cass were so frickin’ over. They’re such laughing stocks now that it’s quickly become lost to time how much the fans were digging them. Of course, they only have themselves to blame for fucking it all up, but they really did have something special there for a bit.

Dean Ambrose in his black torn shirt gives me some serious Bobby Heenan singlet vibes.

Funny how the pre-match hype package for Dean vs. Dolph centers so much around who Dolph Ziggler is because, as I’ve stated here previously, I still have no frickin’ idea who Dolph is supposed to be. He’s some anonymous hybrid of HBK, Mr. Perfect, Billy Gunn, and an ‘80s Trapper Keeper with literally no individuality. I find it ironic that he later got into a storyline where he kept changing gimmicks only to never find anything of his own. What a summary of his entire WWE career.

Hey, Balor may have had to surrender the title 24 hours later, but at least this meant him getting another run with the belt in the future, right? Right?!?

Man, Nikki Bella was so frickin’ over. Why does it feel like I’m repeating myself? In all seriousness though, people can hate on the Bellas all they want, but in no way should it be surprising that they still get big pops. They’ve done more for WWE’s mainstream visibility than a lot of other superstars allegedly have.

Speaking of Nikki, crazy to think that she’s only one in the six-woman tag to not hold the Smackdown Women’s title.

I can’t be the only one who felt a little kick to gut when they showed fans waiting outside the now-deceased Toys R Us. I don’t need another reminder that my childhood is dead.

When did Lana drop the accent? I don’t watch Raw and Smackdown weekly anymore, but it horrifies me to know I let this travesty pass me by.

I know some people were upset they allowed The New Day to surpass Demolition’s record for the longest reign as tag champs but I’m totally okay with the decision. Sure, they occasionally get into terrible storylines like this ringpostitis shit, but they’re incredibly over, sell a ton of merchandise, and can wring out some entertainment from even the worst material. If they really wanted to insult Demolition, they should’ve given that honor to The Ascension.

#wwe summerslam #finn balor #sasha banks #roman reigns #total bellas

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autistic-witchlighter · 5 years

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Charmed Reboot Season 1 Episode 10

Rating: 5 out of 5

Plot: “The sisters seek advice about Harry; an unanticipated threat leads Maggie to a newfound strength; Galvin shares shocking news with Macy that could change everything.”

This is beyond a shadow of a doubt the best written episode this season and my favorite episode hands down. However I wish this plot had extended over to two episodes. It felt like it was a little too much jammed into one episode. Saving Harry should've been two episodes the way it was built up.

Positives: The episode had me crying and clutching my chest. Maggie's and Harry's arcs this episode were emotionally devastating. That is saying a lot because often I don't get this emotionally invested this early or this severly. The few moments of comedic timing was on point. I was emotionally connected to most of the important characters. The villians were very interesting and thought out. The Sarcana plotis progressing wonderfully. Nico is back. I'm wondering if she is investigating Mel, Jada or both.

Negatives: I only have a few but they're not too severe. 1) Macy discusses and uses her magic in public in front of many people simply to impress Galvin. She is supposed to be the logical one. She should realize that could lead to exposure. 2) Galvin gets more frustrating and boring as each episode goes by. This isn't just because I hate the actor. Even if he was played by a good actor, I would still dislike the character. He started with so much potential but it's been squandered. Plus this whole freaking out over your partner being a virgin is a worn out trope. It was used on Jane the Virgin multiple times and and it was frustrating there and that's a show based on virginity. 3) I wished the effects budget was larger. The episode and villains were so good but the effects took away from it because The CW needs to give Charmed a larger budget. This isn't a complaint with the show but the network.

References to the original (This section contains spoilers for the original series.): I got some intense original Charmed Ones vibes from all three sisters this episode. Macy and Maggie gave me Phoebe vibes. Mel gave me Prue and Piper vibes. Maggie also gave me Piper vibes. Macy had the interoffice romance of boss/employee with Galvin like Phoebe did with Jason. However the roles have been reversed with the Charmed One being the boss. Mel gave me Prue vibes with being very vocal about hating her sister's half-demon ex. Mel also gave me Piper vibes about hating the elders and 90% of what they stand for. Mel telling off an elder and putting them in their place was such a Piper power move. Maggie gave me Phoebe vibes from because of the obvious Parker/Cole thing but also Piper vibes because the spell she used reminded me of a combination between Piper's fearless spell and The empathy blocking potion in season six that the sisters and Chris used in season 6. Also, The Sarcana are reminding me of the avatars. I'm wondering if that was intentional, I'm assuming it is because it feels too similar to be accidental.

Theories/What I’d Like To See: I'd like the feed between The Sarana and The Elders to escalate. I don't want to see like a full out battle this season because that could be a good main plot for season two but I would like to see it become less of a stalemate.

Favorite Character This Episode: Maggie with Harry being a close second.

Favorite Quote/Interaction: Oddly Galvin had the best line. Galvin referring to Harry as their "White Person" was hilarious.

Tidbits: I had trouble following along with the Harry flashbacks. I was helped out by @thelaziestmotherfucker who helped explian things I didn't understand. Go show them some love. They make great Charmed reboot gifsets.

Please join me again for next week's episode. In the meantime, please send me asks and/or messages. I would like to get more involved with the community.

#charmed cw #charmed reboot #charmed remake #charmed 2018 #cw charmed #the cw charmed #the cw #charmed cw season 1 #charmed 2.0 #maggie vera #sarah jeffery #mel vera #melonie diaz #macy vaughn #madeline mantock #ellen tamaki #niko hamada #rupert evans #harry greenwood

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andrewuttaro · 5 years

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New Look Sabres: GM 44 - CAR - No Answers

When Jeff Skinner got the All-Star Weekend’s Last Man in Atlantic Division spot this afternoon it felt like we had won something. It’s always fun when it feels like a whole community is behind something but this insistence seems to be a thing with team that don’t win many things. Our closest friends to the north had a few of their players get together in a hotel room and make a video campaigning for Morgan Reilly to be this division’s last man in. We have our guys and we stick by them, especially when we don’t have the mystique of banners blurring our vision. Jeff Skinner, a Toronto boy himself, came into this first game against his former team of eight seasons on a wicked tear tallying 29 goals in 43 games. His agent has also surely ended the telephone tag with the Buffalo Sabres front office to begin contract talks in earnest. For several reasons I think I speak for many Sabres fans when I say hanging a few goals on this Canes team, especially by the stick of Skinner, was a tantalizing idea entering tonight. The 2006 series is a little before my time so the crux of my hatred for Carolina is really rooted in the Whalers night and their treatment of our boy, Jeff. That trade in the rearview mirror last summer and the organization looking for a scoring winger now as if they didn’t have one for eight years, sets the stage for an excellent playoff trash talk: Carolina, Your loaded lineup is clearer to everyone outside then it is to any of the old-fashion tools you have in your front office. You got a GM smart enough to recognize the brilliance of post-game rituals but not smart enough to understand y’all were one goalie away from contention last summer. A Playoff series with you would be a fun confluence of circumstances that would create a small City of fun narratives not least of which would be both teams having being out of the playoffs for so long. Y’all don’t have it, though. You certainly don’t have the goaltending to win a series and of the glut of skilled skaters who would make it difficult for the Sabres to go sweeping these Canes together are less than the sum of their parts. Sabres in 5, and your uninspired team back into the basement! Let’s get down to some Friday night fun!

The first ten minutes of this game was remarkably similar in chances and overall pace. It was back and forth pretty consistently well Carolina seemed to give up the more juicy rebounds and overall chances. Then just about the screwiest goal against for the Sabres this season happened when noted trade bait Micheal Ferland put the puck high on Carter Hutton and the puck went almost straight up. It bounced off the top of the net back toward Hutton and Marco Scandella came rushing into help only to help knock it in. Lucky bounce: Carolina up 1-0. There would be more screwy goals in this game unfortunately. With Jack Eichel back in this game he centers a top line of Skinner and Tage Thompson. Thompson got his opportunities last game; more than that he’s looked great lately and you got to think the patience Phil Housley and this coaching staff has had with him is paying off. That’s a fun top line and after the Sabres held off the Canes push through the remainder of the first it gave us some fun. Rasmus Dahlin was right in front of Curtis McElhinney and put one past him but not in before Jeff Skinner swung in and evened up this game at 1 with twenty seconds left in the first. Even better, it was a powerplay goal for a club that rarely scores powerplay goals. Even better: screw Carolina and their foolish management for cutting loose our sweet Jeff for having a couple concussions several years ago! An NHL team traded this guy! I know we said the same thing about Ryan O’Reilly but guys, this shit is the real deal this time!

It was nothing but good vibes going into the second. Then things really opened up. There was powerplay going each way in the first. In the second there were five; favoring Carolina of course but five. This middle frame is when Carolina outshoots Buffalo who outshot them in the first. The Sabres powerplay had an opportunity early in this period to get ahold of this game and it failed to because we almost forgot how the PP goes on this team with that Skinner goal, eh? Starting at 4:30 into this period three goals happened in 1 minute and 12 seconds. First it was grizzled Canes legacy veteran Justin Williams who skated in from the left wall on Hutton and put it over his near shoulder. Thirty seconds later Evan Rodrigues, Jason Pominville and Johan Larsson come streaming into the O-zone and even though that sounds like the setup to a joke the goal Pommer scored straight as an arrow down the middle was no joke. It was 2-2 for a precious, brief 42 seconds before the most fun name in the NHL Sebastian Aho got a goal in off Rasmus Dahlin’s skate. Hutton had no chance. The rest of the period allowed us to catch our breaths but offered no solace when Sebastian Aho got in another freakish bouncer through Hutton’s legs at 12:27 into the period to get Carolina up 4-2. The Sabres attack seemed to struggle to set up anything in the O-zone for the rest of the period before everyone’s drunk uncle Johan Angry Larry Larson got into a fight he decisively lost against Justin Faulk. The second intermission was nothing like the first: no good vibes this time. Only prayers the third period Sabres come alive and get us this win. Everyone hates Carolina in Buffalo in spite of everyone’s cousin living there according to how many Sabres fans appeared to be at that arena.

Whatever secret mojo the Canes selectively have from season to season, game to game, well they found it. I am not going to bitch and moan about the bounces on the ice because that is the weakest sauce out there. The Canes broke up everything in the third period. Bad bounces aside the Sabres got to the net a handful of times in the in the final frame and just could not get one through. Sabres powerplay: oh you know how it ended. Nothing, nothing happened except my excruciated groans frightening my cats and awaking my wife. That is, until the final five minutes of this game when Kyle Okposo goes all the way down the wall and rode the goal line in and shot the tightest angle goal humanly possible. That makes sense coming from the sex-man: it made me think if Pommer and Okposo can score in this one maybe we can get a November style comeback. My hopes went up and not long after Hutton went off for the extra man and Buffalo called a timeout. Trailing by one goal with less than two minutes left you see the guys gather around the bench where assistant coach Davis Payne strategizes with the olde clipboard. Housley has had some trouble with his behind-the-bench staff or at least that’s the hot rumor right now. Payne seems to be the deployment and strategy guy in situations like this. Sure, the Canes didn’t score an empty netter but this game ended 4-3 and I can’t help but look at the Blue and Gold struggling to get some O-zone time in those last minutes with the extra man and think maybe a shake up behind the bench wouldn’t hurt right now. This loss stung and all the Skinner narrative aside, no combination of right wings for him and Eichel got it done as the panicked shuffling began in the third. I’m not saying these last six games have been so rough because deployment has ruined us, Eichel was out for a few games, but whatever it is they got to figure it out. Carolina is a team you have to beat in the back half of this season especially.

I also hate how the Sabres have been back passing and dumping and chasing for the last dozen games or so. That shit kills teams, it’s not aggressive and it’s not what made this team get ahead in the first half of this season. That first half was a lot of luck but also a lot of making your own chances. This team made few of their own chances tonight and this revolting loss to the Hurricanes is the result. It’s Tampa, Edmonton, Calgary and Vancouver now before the bye-week. If you think any of those teams will be a walk in the park you haven’t you haven’t looked at the standings lately. The Buffalo Sabres are going to fall out of their playoff spot and I don’t feel bad saying it now. It’s inevitable now. The question really is can they get it back: can they? Jack’s going to look a better as we go here but it’s going to take the whole team to make good on the risen standards of this season. The Sabres answered a goal with a goal in the second period of this game but right now it really feels like they have no answers for a team that is damn near in free fall. What’s going to turn it around?

I apologize for this cloud of depression over your Friday night but hey, that’s not my fault is it? Tampa Bay is tomorrow and I find myself on another trip east this weekend so you probably won’t see that postgame blog until Sunday night. I got to be honest: unless we have a fun little upset to talk about I don’t anticipate there being a lot of enthusiastic recapping going on in that one. In spite of that: share this blog with your friends and drop a like. While you’re doing those things drop a comment as well. Maybe you can answer me this: What will it take to get the Sabres on the right track again at this point? Just like the boys in Blue and Gold I don’t have any answers right now for that.

Thanks for reading.

P.S. I think I am happy with Skinner getting 8 mil AAV over 7 years to as much as 9 mil over 7 years. I think he’s reasonable enough to know he won’t be making Eichel money.

#buffalo sabres #hockey #carolina hurricanes #nhl #blog

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popentertainmentconcertreviews · 6 years

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Herb Alpert & Lani Hall – World Café Live – Philadelphia, PA – April 23, 2018

World Café Live took a Tijuana taxi south of the border the other night when legendary trumpeter Herb Alpert and his long-time wife Lani Hall (who used to be the lead singer of Sergio Mendes and Brazil ‘66) shared many of the swinging jazzy compositions from their 50-year plus careers.

Two of the defining lights in popularizing 60s jazz and giving it a Latin vibe, Alpert and Hall (separately, and yet together) mixed swinging jazz beats with traditional Mexican cantina rhythms, pretty much creating the smooth jazz genre (we’ll withhold our opinion on whether that is always a good thing). Alpert and his band The Tijuana Brass was best known for rollicking instrumentals like “Tijuana Taxi,” “The Spanish Flea,” “The Lonely Bull,” “Whipped Cream,” “Rise” and “A Taste of Honey.” (You may not recognize the slightly generic titles, but if you are over 30 undoubtedly you’d recognize each of the songs.) With Sergio Mendes and Brasil ‘66, Hall wrapped her distinctive jazzy vocals over such classics as “Mas Que Nada,” “Like a Lover,” “O Pato,” “The Look of Love” and the superlative cover of the Beatles’ “Fool on the Hill.”

Alpert is a renaissance man, beyond playing on, arranging and producing many albums over the years, he has worn many hats and had many interests. He was the “A” in the venerable record label A&M Records, which introduced the world to many huge artists, including Sergio Mendes, the Carpenters, Cat Stevens, Peter Frampton, Styx, Supertramp, Bryan Adams and Janet Jackson. He also founded another label, Almo Sounds, which is best known for breaking Garbage. Alpert has also been painting for over 50 years – several of his works of art were used as stage backdrops for this concert. (Between the paintings, old photos, vintages clips of their bands, current music videos, etc., this 83-year-old trumpeter schooled many much younger artists on video stage production.)

However, 44 years into their marriage, the couple can still put on one hell of a show.

The concert started with Alpert’s newest video, a commentary piece with a lovely, mostly instrumental take of the Louis Armstrong standard “What a Wonderful World.” Then the band started out with a series of terrific covers, everything from a sultry version of Michael Jackson’s “Human Nature,” to a nearly unrecognizable jazz re-up of Van Morrison’s “Moondance.”

Alpert was a terrific host, good naturedly cracking wise at himself – “There I am before I started dying my hair gray,” he said, pointing to a photo of himself in the 60s. When Alpert took lead vocals on one of the few songs he ever sang, “This Guy’s in Love with You,” he also openly acknowledged his vocal limitations. He also took questions from the audience about his long career. These included telling a story which was both funny and tragic at the same time, about one instance when Alpert loaned a trumpet to his good friend Chet Baker, who was going through some hard times and needed it to make a new recording. Baker (best known for “Let’s Get Lost” and “Almost Blue”) was a brilliant player whose career never reached the heights deserved because he was also an infamous drug addict. Within three days, Baker had pawned the instrument for money to get a fix.

The couple had so many hits that both smashed their biggest classics into medleys. First there was a wonderfully fun mashup of eight of his biggest hits (“Rise” [a 1979 Alpert solo hit], “Whipped Cream,” “The Spanish Flea,” “The Lonely Bull,” “Casino Royale,” “MC's Shuffle,” “Tijuana Taxi” and “A Taste of Honey”). A little later in the show, Hall took center stage for a Brazil ’66 medley (“The Look of Love,” “Upa, Neguinho,” “The Fool on the Hill,” “Never Say Never Again” [a Hall solo joint from the 80s], “Like a Lover” and “Mas que Nada”), with Alpert adding trumpet on some of her songs.

The band also did a wide-ranging and tasteful group of covers, everything from two Beatles songs (“Something” and “Michelle”) to a nice take on Jason Mraz’ new-millennial hit “I’m Yours,” which was accompanied by a charming video exposing men’s adoration and fidelity to the trumpet. There was also a swaying medley of hits by bossa nova legend Antonio Carlos Jobim (including “Aqua de Beber,” “The Waters of March,” “Corvocado,” “One Note Samba,” “The Girl from Ipanema” and more. Alpert and Hall also did show stopping versions of standards like “Bye Bye Blackbird,” “Fly Me to the Moon,” “Putting on the Ritz” and “I’ve Got You Under My Skin.”

It was a sweet and smart old-fashioned show, the kind of thing that you would see in Vegas back when Vegas was still cool. Late in their careers, Alpert and Hall have every right to slow down and maybe even retire, but if the licks are still this hot, why would they possibly want to do that?

#Herb Alpert #Lani Hall #2018 #Concert Reviews #World Cafe Live #Philadelphia #Jay S. Jacobs #Jim Rinaldi

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aion-rsa · 7 years

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Latour Predicts an Action Packed 2017 for Southern Bastards

The fictional setting of Jason Aaron and Jason Latour’s Eisner-winning “Southern Bastards,” Craw County, Alabama is a powder keg waiting to explode. The fuse was lit in 2014’s series’ opening arc when Euless Boss, the local crime lord and high school football coach, murdered a man named Earl Tubb. It’s been a slow burning fuse, especially in 2016, when the series only released three issues. But Earl Tubb’s Marine Corps member daughter Roberta has finally arrived in Craw County, and will soon enact her plans for vengeance.

RELATED: Latour On Finally Tying Up His Loose Ends with Brunner & Renzi

2017 is sure to be a big year for the series, as Boss contends with Roberta, several new and soon to be introduced power players, and his team’s losing streak. We spoke with Latour about the plans for the book, why Roberta Tubb was given a slow burn introduction into the larger story he and Aaron are telling, and how important it is for him to have a book to draw, especially now that he’s known for his work as a writer on books like Marvel Comics’ “Spider-Gwen.”

CBR: There were only three issues of “Southern Bastards” published in 2016, and I imagine that’s partly because you and Jason Aaron are really busy guys. Was it also because you guys want to give the series the time it deserves?

Jason Latour: Yeah, we went into this never expecting anybody to really buy our football-murder comic. [Laughs] We knew we had a chance to do something interesting because we were both so invested in it, and because people who knew Jason A’s work knew that “Scalped” was really good. But the book has been about 10,000 times more successful than I ever thought it would be.

Part of staying the course, to keep it on the level of what we both expect and get out of it, is to put the comic out that we feel comfortable with. Like you said, both of us are very busy with our careers, so we’ve got a lot of fingers in a lot of pies. That hasn’t helped our schedule, no, but there was definitely an organic story-centric need for a recharge at the end of arc number three.

We’re just very committed to making sure this comic is served when the meal is ready. [Laughs] There’s a lot of comics out there that people can consume like fast food. They can get them on demand. They can get them when they’re greedy for them, but this is a comic we try to treat exactly like good barbecue. You cook the pig until it’s right; when the pig is done, it’s done. When it’s gone, it’s gone, and you close up for the day. I’m certain that frustrates some people, but I’m also confident in the product and the effort that goes into making the comic that only we make, the way only we can make it.

That said, I really thank people for being patient because the readers that have been loyal to this comic have gone above and beyond normal fandom. I can’t speak highly enough about their passion for it. It’s really endearing and gratifying and energizing.

November’s #15 focused primarily on the imploding world of Coach Boss, but we did see a little more of Roberta Tubb, who is in Craw County doing recon. What made you and Jason want to give her such a slow burn introduction? And will we finally see what Roberta is capable during the current arc?

Yes, the end of this arc is probably conceived as the most action packed thing we’ve done. It will heavily involve bringing Roberta to the forefront and her enacting the first step of her plan. Hopefully, everything draws together, and by the end this story will have one of the most explosive arcs we’ve done to date.

Easing Roberta into the story was really necessary, because this is a story where the premise has always been that the bastards have won the day. They’re in charge. Wanting to see people like Coach Boss toppled, or feeling conflicted about Coach Boss and not knowing if you want him to fail or not is all very important to the way this comic works. That needed to be set up slowly.

We sort of introduced a white hat early in Earl Tubb, but introducing the real protagonist so soon would have done the comic a disservice, especially considering that, thematically, a big part of this story revolves around setting up this a very toxic and masculine environment. You have to see the consequences of that and get to know the players and the lay of the land before you introduce the person who could potentially up end it in Roberta Tubb.

It was a big gamble on our part where we knew that our fourth issue threw people a curve ball, and then we asked them to wait a long time for any real release. But I think the small releases people have experienced do seem amplified by that.

With “Southern Bastards,” you can always expect us to be true to the story that we’re telling, whether that takes a little longer to actually make the comic, or it takes a little longer to play out some elements. Sometimes what you expect isn’t necessarily what you’re going to enjoy.

Issue #15 also introduced readers to a new power player in Craw County, the mayor’s wife, Leddy. What can you tell us about her? How big a role will she play in the series moving forward?

We’ve plotted through a lot of the next two arcs, and more and more, Leddy keeps popping up in conversations. Where she comes from and her actual hold over things are stuff that certainly needs to be explored. She’s an interesting antagonist or foil for Coach Boss. I am a little hesitant to go into how much we’ll see of her, but she’s definitely going to be a player moving forward. In many ways, she seems like a good mirror for Roberta.

I’m curious about another new character who appears on the cover of “Southern Bastards” #17. He looks a lot like an older Burt Reynolds, and appears to have a pet monkey. Who is he?

[Laughs] That’s Colonel Quick McCluskey. He is a character who we both very quickly (pun embraced) have fallen in love with. I told Jason Aaron that there will be a point in the future where people might look back on this comic and instead of saying that’s where the book jumped the shark, they’ll say that’s where they introduced the monkey. [Laughs]

He is a rival crime boss that supports a rival football team. I’ll leave it at that. He’ll definitely be a major player in this next arc, and maybe even moving forward beyond that. He’s been a lot of fun.

When things are very serious, they sort of reflect how absurd life is. So to me, McClusky fits that sort of Coen Brothers vibe we’re both big fans of. So ridiculous, he’s terrifying. We’re always trying to feed stuff like that into this comic because that’s the way I think we both feel about real life.

One of the things we’ve been reminded of throughout “Southern Bastards” is how big an impact the past has on the present. It looks like March’s issue #18 will show how the past impacts Roberta.

Yes. It was Faulkner who said, “The past is prelude.” That’s the most educated book learned thing you’re going to ever hear me say. [Laughs] I think that’s true of both “Southern Bastards” and “Loose Ends” [a series by Latour, Chris Brunner]. Both Southern fiction and Crime fiction share this obsession with how the ripples of past mistakes can become this tidal wave in the present.

Issue #18 is by me and Chris Brunner. That’s a chapter I’m writing and he’s drawing. What Roberta is going to be weighing in that issue is just how much her father, Earl Tubb, actually got what he was looking for in the end. And how much of the impact he made on her growing up has led her to Craw County — and to this seemingly inescapable momentum that’s put her on a collision course with Coach Boss.

Chris is drawing issue #18, but you’re the regular artist. How does it feel to have a book where you can go and draw when you’re doing so much writing these days?

It’s very difficult, but also invaluable. As somebody who’s drawn his whole life I need that gear shift. Writing is something that I take very seriously, and I’m very fond of . . . when it’s going well. [Laughs]

For me, there’s sort of a meditative quality to drawing. Once I’ve done a lot of thinking about the storytelling on the page I then actually have to execute it. That’s a very time intensive process where you have to sit there and basically break your back over the board for a couple hours every night. It can be almost mechanical at times— but I think it really helps me think through what I want to do creatively. So writing and drawing are two things that are very intrinsically linked for me. I may eventually scale back on drawing some (as if it’s even possible for me to do less, right?) because it’s a lot harder, but I don’t ever want to quit. It’s all storytelling, and that’s what I love.

Does being a working artist improve the collaborations on the other books you’re writing?

I definitely think it has. I’m very fortunate to say that I’ve done every single creative task when it comes to making comics, except being an editor… at least formally. I even lettered “Loose Ends” by hand. I’ve done every one of the jobs on both a creator-owned and professional basis, and I’ve done them to varying degrees of success.

It certainly helps when you’re collaborating on a comic, because on one hand, you know what you’re talking about, and on the other hand you know how it feels to sit in that chair and be that other person. I imagine there have been some times when my experiences doing those other tasks have gotten in the way, but more times than not they’ve helped with communication and the empathy you need to keep those relationships alive.

You know how they say directors should take acting classes so they know exactly what to yell at the actors? [Laughs] That’s sort of what it’s like.

What else does 2017 holds for “Southern Bastards?” The Image site suggests the next issue will hit in January and we’ll be getting one issue a month for the next several months.

That will be the attempt. We don’t want to have too many long gaps on this next arc. Issue #15 is out now. Issue #16 has gone to the printer. There’s issue #17 and then Chris Brunner is drawing #18 from a script I wrote. The last two parts make the arc an even six issues, and will put us to right around the end of Spring for the conclusion.

 Then there’s talk of me potentially tackling a floating issue all by myself, on both writing and art. If that happens or not is contingent on lots of stuff, but it’s something I’m very excited about. Then we’ll probably take a break and assess when we’ll come back for Volume 5 from there.

So I can’t stress enough that we’re far from done with this comic. 2017 is hopefully going to be a more productive year. I’ve been joking that we did less issues in 2016 because we knew it was gonna be a bad year and we want people good and ready to tear shit up in 2017.

Truthfully, I’d say we’re roughly approaching the midway point to the series and I’m very hopeful and excited about what’s to come because every time Jason and I have creative jam sessions about where we’re headed, I leave feeling more and more excited about it. Which is strange for me, given that I never thought I’d draw a comic bigger than a one shot. [Laughs]

So staring down the barrel at a series that could potentially run 30-40 issues is really intimidating, but also exciting. I’m just very grateful for everybody who supported us at this point and I hope they continue to enjoy the little football murder comic that could.

The post Latour Predicts an Action Packed 2017 for Southern Bastards appeared first on CBR.com.

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