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#it will be on his bed when it comes home
ofgentleresolve · 1 year
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@theimpalpable sent in: Caradoc attempts to not be as loud as usual; he doesn't want to upset Lamon on his birthday by being too dramatically noisy. So he casually steps inside with Lexine by his side, both of them carrying different items. Caradoc is holding two gift bags, one from himself and another from Lexine; both destined to land on Lamon's hands. In the smallest bag, Lamon'll be able to find a box that contains a cat flower pot, along with a botanical-themed stationery set that perhaps could be useful for his classes. Upon the biggest bag, rests a succulent throw pillow and a plant plushie, these last two being Caradoc's idea.
"Happy Birthday, Lam!" Caradoc says with excitement, grinning from ear to ear. "Look what Lex made for you, ain't they cool?!" His chin tries to point at what Lexine is holding, which is a tray of succulent cupcakes. Worry not! She tried her best to make sure the ingredients were lactose-free. The girl smiles, shoulders gently lifting so the cupcakes can be seen better. "Happy Birthday, Lam."
(HELLO I come here to celebrate Lam's birthday IHWEDHWD, hope this is okay, dear Ferre!!! If not pls feel free to skip! Hope you're doing well, CARE YOU LOTS)
His birthday is, unshockingly, no different from a regular day off, sans the grading and lesson planning that always has an urgent deadline. Not that he minds it- it is rather peaceful and while he is, in all technicalities, alone for the day, he doesn’t necessarily feel lonely. It was his decision not to go home for the holidays. To be with his family mainly because his parents were taking a vacation to Europe alone. And his sister, well, apparently she has a boyfriend from France and he’s invited her to spend the holidays with his family. He didn’t want to third wheel either couple.
( He’s done that one too many times, if he’s honest. )
Henceforth why he spent December 25th in the diner with Ray, who strangely enough also decided he wasn’t going back to Singapore for the holidays. He should’ve known that Ray would have made an OCCASION out of it. And gotten their friends in on it too.
“How did you-“ A pointed ( but still half-hearted ) look on his face towards Ray behind the counter. “You told them, didn’t you?”
Ray shrugs, as if Lam were asking him about, say, the weather. “They’re our friends- of course they’ll wanna celebrate. Besides, you sure you want me in charge of making you a cake?”
Touché, although Lam doesn’t say that outright. He imagines that Lexine probably persuaded Ray to let her take care of providing the food. Between the two of them, she is the baker, after all. And the one with common sense too- no one wants a stomachache on their birthday anyways.
“What are you two- you didn’t have to do this much.” Getting a set of cupcakes is one thing, it’s another to get such a collection of gifts ( if he wants to take the succulent pillow out and hug it for the rest of his stay here, he won’t say ). Licking the icing off of one cupcake though- it feels a bit like a crime to do so- he glances over at Doc, who is being weirdly considerate…it’s nice, but also-
“Just say something. Please” He blurts out suddenly. It’s too weird, Doc not talking and well, being loud next to Ray. “You don’t- it’s weird when you’re quiet.”
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The heat rushes to his face as the urge to hide his face suddenly grows. That’s just the kind of people they are, aren’t they? The kind to celebrate even the smallest of occasions, like HIS BIRTHDAY. “…Thanks. For celebrating.”
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puppyeared · 4 months
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is this your card? ♦️♣️♥️♠️ it isnt but you dont wanna hurt his feelings
#this was supposed to be a warmup but i got carried away.... i havent drawn in so long that its been hard to focus orz#im testing a new brush for fun. again.. i think i can use this for clean lineart..?? im surprised i went as long as i did with the#narinder brush honestly... but i wanna try something new so here we are again#if i could get my shit together id love to draw a model of his van because i have smth really cool in mind..i was looking at pictures#of old wooden caravans like the horse drawn ones and i wonder if i could combine that with the shape of an RV#i like the ones with a door at the rear bc it kinda lookslike a train caboose.. maybe he'd get someone to weld him a custom ride!!#idk how intricate and detailed i can design it without making it a pain in the ass to draw every time BUT i have a general idea#it would probably have a door on the side but idk if itd flip down to make a stage or upwards to make a roof?? and then theres a#curtain behind it where he would come out and do his show methinks.. ive been looking at pictures of camping vans on pinterest for ideas#i dont think he LIVES in the van since i mentioned his home is an old run down theatre when he isnt on the road. i wanna draw that too#but the RV should have enough for long travels like a bed and cabinets..? maybe a net hanging on the ceiling where all his props go#id like to think of ideas for a hometown.. toronto has a huge entertainment district so it would make sense for him to live there#although id also love to base parts of it from vancouver since id love to go back and visit </3#..would there be furth names for those places?? nyancouver... clawronto... whinnypeg (like a horse whinny)...#pawson creek.... purrlington... otterwa.. i love coming up with names lol#my art#myart#my oc#oc#sleight#laikas comet oc#fan character#fur#furry art
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willowser · 1 month
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roommate touya who falls for you bc of your thoughtfulness tho 🥺 when you order food there’s always something for him too. you bring him back coffee every time you do a starbucks run. you share everything you have with him too, like your nice smelling shampoo (even tho you make fun of his three in one body wash conditioner shampoo LMAO). maybe you get the two of you fun pairs of comfy slippers to wear around the house to. you make the house into a home and he’s so smitten because of it
anon 🥺 you gettttt itttt 🥺🥺 i have such a detailed idea for roommate touya i want to write it so bad !!! i just. have such a vision for him in my head.....it's weird that yall are still roommates....bc you didn't even start out as friends.....keigo and rumi both moved out and you were just. together and that was it. and then you got sick of your apartment and picked a new house to rent. and you just. live together and do everything together and it makes no sense !! you're adults !!! but you're too used to each other 🥺🥺🥺 WAAAHHH YOU GET IT YOU GET IT EXACTLLLLLYYYYYY
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caluupin · 1 year
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Idle animation swap! This time Kaveh gets both of the keys :)
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luvring · 8 months
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"everyone's going back to their haikyuu phase" I've been here for like seven years actually
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softesttangerines · 7 months
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As someone who LOVES a good old time travel au, and after seeing amazing fanart of kid!Mihawk i have to let it out!!
I just wanna read a time travel fic where baby Mihawk wakes up and finds himself in the world of adult Mihawk and he's like wtf is going on?
And word goes around that a kid that looks exactly like Hawkeyes and carries the same cross knife as him is roaming around this island and rumors say it's the son he abandoned to fend for himself.
And so, marines and every pirates he ever wronged come after him for revenge and the little guy is just thinking why is everyone trying to get me? While doing his best with his cross dagger to rid of them.
And Shanks, good ol' shanks could have sworn that if his old rival had an 9years old, he would know about it (also he refuses to let the bitter taste in his heart take over unless his own eyes see) so he's skeptical about the whole thing and that's the only thing that gets him to leave his hideout in a reclused ghost island waiting for whatever is his big plan to take place.
News say Red Shanks is on the move after being mia for a few years and everyone got their panties in a twist, what could have raised the emperor from the dead.
He follows from island to island because apparently the young boy knows how to avoid the marines and pirates coming after him.
Till one night, on their stop at some bar on an island that wasn't really on the plan, he sees the boy. Just outside the bar in an alley, where he went to empty his guts from the booze overfilling his body, there stood bloody faced, cross dagger in one hand, a tiny version of his old rival with a bounty hunter's body at his feet.
The boy furrows his eyebrows even more at the new arrival and strikes another pose in case the new guy tries something funny. But Shanks, drunk ass Shanks, who knows his rival by heart is a 100% sure the little guy is in fact his rival for whatever magical reason, there he stands in front of him in the form of an 9years old and Shanks giggles at that -to which the child takes great offense- and just say "hey kid, i'm a friend of your dad's, want me to take you to him?"
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#mishanks#Ok so here I'm running with the fandom's theory that rayleigh is mihawk's dad#And after getting all these murder attempts on his person he's just so fckn tired of anyone that approaches him So he's completely on guard#when this red haired dude comes out of nowhere n tells him he knows his dad#Which no one did before all they did was charge at him screaming HAWKEYES YOU'RE GONNA REGRET WHAT YOU DID#And here's the thing#he may be inclined to believe the red haired guy because no one knows his relation to rayleigh#so this guy must really know his dad and he's tired of running all the time he just wants his bed and parents#so cut him some slack when he follows a random one armed red haired pirate#On the other hand the crew is equally creeped out and charmed by the little fella because even young he still installs the chills in them#How can he be as equally as skilled as he is cuuuuute#They try their best not to say it to his face because he threatens to stab them at any given chance but they cant HELP IT#it's Dracule Fucking Mihawk as an 9years old!!!! Ofc he's cute#Shanks cant fucking wait to get his adult Mihawk back to tease the shit out of him about the little version of him lol#When they got him to rayleigh he fckn cried because that's his fckn son znd the last time he saw hus baby that way was more than 30years ag#Mihawk is just confused as fuck why is his dad's grey n have much more wrinklesBut it's still one familiar face so he just sticks to him#The red haired pirate keeps telling him that he should look for him when he gets home but he doesn't understand!!!#He also keeps challenging shanks on a duel once he discovers he's a swordsman and keeps on losing#And truth be told shanks is embarrassed as fuck because it took him his rival being a child for him to win over mihawk#opla#one piece#mihawk#dracule mihawk#red haired shanks#shanks
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I wish I could walk into a room and greet him with “hey, handsome” for the rest of my life
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skunkes · 8 months
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google search results for kitties cuddling
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zappedbyzabka · 8 months
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Sacrificial lamb and all that
#baby baby baby#He said :(#and#he said ☹️#The way Kreese stared at him and hovered like a hungry wolf ready to pounce the whole time#the way Johnny tried not to cry and sweat and went straight into the arms of his predator like he has for YEARS#because he’d been literally in Kreese’s hands. Given to him and left with him. for YEARS.#And the way he stared up at him so desperate and melted into his grasp#let him swipe his hurting nose and obeyed when he made him do something he didn’t want to#because who else does he have. And his mom wasn’t there. and he had to go home with bruises all over him and no one#to Sid. to be mocked and laughed at some more. to cry all alone in his bed thinking about how the man he trusted and loved hurt him#And I think Kreese was more jealous. murderously so. that Johnny clearly wanted to be on good terms with LaRusso rather than so mad he lost#and by the time he realized he went too far and he lost his little champion—whom he ‘loves most besides CK’—he decided to get revenge on#Miyagi and Daniel. because it’s THEIR fault he did that to johnny in the first place. he hates them both with a passion. HE was humiliated#in front of his boy and the rest of the cobras by Miyagi. and Daniel…he changed Johnny. he practically took him away from Kreese.#Man is delusional cause that’s 10000% how he sees things#and GOD the way he begs Johnny to come back in ck. and then hurt him more because ‘thats what was best for him’#and Johnny moves away from his touch and stares at him like an abused animal but still lets him stay#because he still loves him despite everything#he knows Kreese is in his own reality and does love him. but he realized his worth to an extent#realized its not okay for Kreese to have done all those things to him#and brainwashed him#and he was being victim blamed the whole time Kreese came back to cobra kai#I cant.#I’m SCREAMING. everything was taken from him but it was his fault because he ‘shouldnt have let Kreese come back’#Only unobservant idiots ignore the fact that he was abused his whole life just so they can hate on him constantly.#johnny lawrence#cobra kai#karate kid#Still love Kreese though
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merakiui · 1 year
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some thoughts about jade leech as a stalker.
(cw: yandere, nsfw, stalking, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, obsession, mentions of death/strangulation)
Jade does not love often. In fact, he has a rather small supply of love, which is reserved for his hobbies and family, so when he loves something other than those two things it can only mean trouble. When Floyd has something special and doesn’t share... Well, naturally Jade’s going to want it. He’s never been inherently greedy. Rather, he’s always let Floyd have everything: the larger half of a bluefin tuna, the shinier stone, the bigger seashells, the slice of cake with more frosting, his uniforms whenever Floyd’s were dirtied or damaged. And in return Floyd has, for the most part, shared his things with Jade. This has always been their normal. 
But this time Floyd makes no mention of sharing when it comes to you. In the past, when they were particularly interested in someone, they would share them. Or, in other words, torment that person in equal succession. Azul has been their prime target for years now, and it doesn’t look like either of them will stop their relentless pursuit in seeing how fast they can get Azul to grouse or groan or sigh. You might think they live to see Azul’s misery, but truthfully they want to accompany Azul as he carves misery into the hearts of the poor, unfortunate souls who thought it wise to do business with deep-sea beasts. Teasing him is just a bonus. 
When it comes to you, Floyd is his usual authentic self: blunt and honest to a fault, dangerously so. But that’s what makes his twin so fun. Floyd won’t sugarcoat the obvious. If he dislikes you, he’ll make it known. Jade, on the other hand, will speak syrupy sweet lies in an effort to maintain proper goodwill, even if he detests you. You’ve never really interested Jade, so he can’t say he hates you. But he can’t say he loves you either. To him, you are just a powerless human in a habitat that does not suit you. Really, even with all of the tricks and traps you pulled to beat Azul at his own game, you remained boring to him. He didn’t pay you much mind after everything had been resolved and you’d been free to return to Ramshackle. That should have been the end of his story with you. 
But then, some time later, you start to make frequent appearances at the lounge. It doesn’t take Jade long to learn that you only show up when Floyd’s on shift, and it also doesn’t take him long to theorize that you might have fallen for his brother’s unique charms. It’s sweet, in a way, how Floyd lights up when he sees you, how you smile a little more brightly when he speaks to you, how your laughter is so very buoyant when Floyd lifts you into the air and spins you happily. Jade’s content to watch from the sidelines, pleased to know that his brother has found a friend in you. That might make it easier to trick you into a contract.
He’s so set in this way of thinking, only viewing you as a pawn or a stepping stone towards some bigger end goal. But when Floyd brings you back to the dorm and you become more than a constant in Jade’s life, he starts to wonder what makes you so special. What is it about you that has his brother so enamored? What makes you irresistible? What parts of you are appealing? Jade thinks it might be how quick it is you submit when Floyd’s got you pinned into the mattress, face first, rough hands spreading your thighs apart, so he can sink into you more easily. Floyd likes that; he likes the weak things that crumble under him. He likes to push things to breaking. He likes to mark and bite and bloody and bruise and shred.
Jade likes to fix. He likes to mend, and then break, and then mend all over again. He likes the process, the psychological science behind a simple gesture, much like how he takes great pleasure in playing god over the plants in his terrariums. They say a budding serial killer starts small—with animals like rabbits or squirrels or cats. Jade starts with plants. He’ll put them in stressful environments—in soils with nutrients that don’t quite work—and he’ll watch them wilt, mottle, mold, and decay. He’ll watch them struggle to adapt, he’ll watch them yearn for water or sunlight, and only when he’s certain they’ve had enough he’ll give them proper, healthy care. It’s fun, the way he has so much control over something as dynamic as a plant. But plants cannot protest, cannot fight back, cannot act in the same way humans do. 
But it’s quite satisfying to pluck dried petals from a withered flower, almost like a morbid game of effeuiller la marguerite, and not hear a single scream.
So Jade is fully expecting Floyd to tire of you, to break you enough until boredom sinks its fangs into him and he moves on with his life. And what Floyd breaks Jade fixes, so he’s very ready to glue your heart together when Floyd shatters it. He’s ready to offer a handkerchief and his ear should you need to vent. He’s already prepared his speech: “I must apologize on behalf of Floyd. You know very well how he gets. If I can be of assistance in any way, please let me know.”
Unfortunately, you remain intact. Months pass, Floyd continues to love you, and your relationship unfolds like a lotus in early morning. Jade continues to observe. Floyd has never been one for privacy, so he’s seen every kiss, every bite, every inch of exposed skin. Hell, he’s sat at his desk and tallied Mostro Lounge’s monthly expenses while Floyd fucked you dumb on the other side of the room. He’s even made eye contact with you when you happened to gaze his way while his twin was buried balls-deep in that tight hole of yours. He wonders what goes on in that head of yours. Perhaps there’s nothing substantial within. Floyd’s scrambled your brains enough, so you could just be useless now. Though that wouldn’t be very fun, would it? He knows there’s more to you than you let on, especially when you play top and take every inch of Floyd, riding him so skillfully, and all Floyd can do is dig his fingers into your hips to guide you along to the rough, erratic pace the both of you have set. 
Jade watches fondly from the shadows. Floyd likes to have access to your neck and shoulders; he likes to take you from behind while leaning down to bite into soft flesh. But Jade thinks it would be much nicer to gaze upon your face, to kiss salt from your eyes, to pepper your jawline with tiny pecks, all while peering into eyes that house a beautiful soul. He thinks it would be nice to hold you down, have your legs wrapped around his waist or thrown up onto his shoulders, while he bottoms out. If it were Jade, he’d take you in every position, but he’d find the most pleasure in eye contact. There’s something intimate about it, much like how there’s intimacy in the hands that wrap around a throat. You have to be close to someone when you’re restricting their airflow; you have to squeeze until veins pop, until your hands are sore, until your fingernails have burrowed so deeply into skin that the crescent moons color crimson. It takes minutes to strangle someone, and every minute is spent staring into the wide, terrified eyes of a desperate soul on the verge of death.
Jade likes the way you smell, the way you speak, the way you laugh, the way you are, in every meaning of the word, so very filled with life. Even down to the way you breathe and gasp and moan and cry, you are life itself. Jade wants to bottle that for himself—pluck you from Floyd’s flower pot and place you in a terrarium with the most potent elements just to see how long you’d fare. He wants to save you from those same conditions, sandwich your face between gloved hands when he’s kneeled to your lowered height, and whisper about how it’s okay, about how you’re safe, about how he’d never truly hurt you. Jade knows that loving someone is a very special thing, but the way he loves you is not quite pleasant. The love he has for his hobbies and family is natural. Normal. Simplistic and familial. 
The love he has for you is murderous and frightening. Some days he looks at you like you’re prey he’s not yet devoured. Like you’re to be his first victim. 
Jade starts small. He takes tiny trinkets—a keychain, a pencil, an accessory. He stores these in a shoe box under his bed. When Floyd brings you over and clothes are cast aside, he swipes your undergarments for himself. He won’t wash them until he absolutely must. He’ll have the soft fabric wrapped around his dick later that same evening when Floyd’s fallen asleep and he’s up late contemplating love and lust and life and death, and he’ll cum to the thought of you. Sweet, adorable, oblivious you. 
He’s what one would call a persistence predator—a hunter who gradually wears his prey down over time. He takes from you, watches you, listens to you fret about missing things to Floyd, who promises to find the bastard who’s messing with you and squeeze them until they’re blue and purple. Jade smiles at that. Floyd wouldn’t really do that to him. Sure, they’ve hit each other when they’ve fought and roughhoused on occasion, but the punches were never truly meant. Sure, they might have been thrown playfully or angrily, but they were all temporary bouts of strength. Floyd wouldn’t truly hurt him, so to hear these determined promises and to see how you relax around him... It’s really cute. Jade wonders how much more he can take from you. 
And he wonders how much more you can take before you’re splintering. 
Really, you got lucky that Floyd picked you first. He’s far more merciful. Far more sweeter. Far more loving. At least Floyd is honest with his (at times) rough nature. At least he makes it known that he wants to bite you until you’re bleeding. But Floyd can’t stand whining. He hates it when people cry about things he can’t bother to care about, and lately you’ve been whining about this stalker you think you have for weeks now. Floyd’s told you you’re just being a scared shrimpy—that there is no stalker, that you’re probably just misplacing or losing these items, that none of them really matter because they’re replaceable. 
Jade gets lucky when Floyd finally washes his hands of you, officially fed up with your whining. And what Floyd damages Jade fixes. So when you’re in tears, distraught over the break-up and your missing items and your stalker and the fact that the door to Ramshackle was left unlocked again and that you feel like someone’s living in your shadow, Jade arrives to rescue you from your fear. You don’t even hesitate to cling to him and cry, spilling your worries in waterfalls. Perhaps it’s because he’s a familiar face. He is a reflection of Floyd, after all. 
“Oh dear,” he’ll whisper, stroking your back, allowing you to bury your face in his chest and sob. “There, there.”
You can’t see his expression, but there is a smile spreading on his lips. And his eyes are alight with cruel glee. 
“Would it make you feel better if someone accompanied you to your classes?” Your feeble nod is all he needs. “In that case, shall I spend a few days at Ramshackle with you? I’m certain whoever’s pursuing you won’t get very far if I’m around.”
And he’s right. Your stalker never takes anything again. They never leave the front door unlocked. They never trail behind you, taking shelter in your shadow. That’s because he’s your stalker, though you never managed to figure that out, and this time he doesn’t have to dwell in shadows or on the sidelines. This time he can stand before you as a friend, a soon-to-be lover, and perhaps a lifelong mate. 
Jade does not love often, but when he does it is as beautifully painful as tearing the wings from butterflies. 
#meraki mumbles#yandere twst#n/sfw#i think my favorite thing about writing yandere jade is how brutal and remorseless he can be#it's probably because he grew up in the harsh environment of the sea#which would naturally harden anyone and make them more predatory than a prey#it's probably also why he (and floyd and azul) see nothing wrong with murder#yes it's morally wrong and very much illegal#but in the ocean it's eat or be eaten and really do you think jade is going to let some other predator snap his darling up? :)#challenge: write one yan jade thought without it spiraling into a thought about his murderous rizz#challenge failed </3 he is a walking danger you cannot tell me he wouldn't think of the most horrifying things when it comes to darling#more jade thoughts!!! consider an artist (painter/sculpter/etc) jade who is absolutely obsessed with you (the nude model from his art class)#because you're the one who has finally inspired him and broken his months-long artist's block#and also because he'd like to paint you in the most vicious red#or jade who has broken into your home and is living there in secret without you knowing#sometimes he sleeps under your bed just to hear your steady breaths#he never rearranges anything in your house but he does do the dishes or clean up messes you've made#you can never remember if or when you cleaned these things but you never think much of it#jade stands at your bedside when you sleep at night and he watches you#you'll happen to wake and you'll spot him but by the time you've scrambled to wake up and turn the lights on he'll already be gone#so you're left to wonder if he was ever there in the first place or if you were still dreaming#he is the terror that you will never see until it's too late
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cqcandchill · 3 months
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just a goofy pic spam of my fave little guy 🥹
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yourlazykitkat · 3 months
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starryficsfinishwen · 10 months
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HAPPY ACTIVATION CHROME MY LOVE (IM SORRY I AM LATE IN POSTING UR GIFT)
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I-
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SCREAMING CRYING IN PUBLIC WITH EARPHONES ON READING THIS LETTERRRRR
also-
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👁️👄👁️ you are giving me to many thoughts chrome
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aaandbackstabbed · 8 months
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countess-of-edessa · 5 months
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“are the girls going to help you make pierogis?” well no one else is fucking gonna are they? no one else in this house has functional fucking hands apparently
#every Christmas i think about the time we came home from mass and my father said “finally! now we can relax.” and sat down at his computer#and played video games for the next three hours while my mother and sister and i stood six feet away from him in the kitchen making#200 pierogis.#it’s crazy considering the amount of stuff he gets done for him on a daily basis that I would never even think would be done for me by anyo#like bed made for him/all meals/all dishes/food put on his plate for him because he refuses to do it himself/pretty much all errands#whenever he wants tea he just says that want out loud and it gets brought to him by magic#i mean or anything else! he once said “did you say we were having cappuccinos today?” just to no one in particular and we all knew no one h#had said anything of the sort. and then he was given one!#of course he goes to work from 8-6ish every day but other than one day a week it’s remote and has been for years and i can hear him#he is pretty much never not on the phone gossiping with someone#and i don’t begrudge him having a not physically intensive job or anything but im just trying to think of the things he has to do#he makes my mother mow the lawn. i do it when i am home because i think that’s disgraceful.#if my mother begs hard enough he'll do the least amount of yard work possible if it’s something we can’t physically do by ourselves.#but on a daily basis it’s just go to work/eat the breakfast brought to you/eat the lunch brought to you/come downstairs eat the dinner made#for you/play video games until you go to bed in the bed that was made for you in the morning#and on non work days it’s just eat/video games/bed#and like all this to say#he complains more and has a worse attitude than anyone I have ever known in my life#whenever he encounters a minor inconvenience he's talking about how it never ends and he never gets a chance to rest for once#literally any day that’s not spent in complete and total stagnation is considered a failure#he hates when my mother and sister and i are happy like we can’t even play music and laugh in the kitchen while we cook and clean up after#meals because it distracts him from his video games and his YouTube videos about video games and the war in Ukraine#he gets mad when we laugh too much lol like dude you’re pretty lucky you have daughters who can have fun while doing the dishes#considering you haven’t done them in like 20 years#word to the ladies out there btw: my parents used to clean up after dinner together when they first got married. so watch out lmao
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hella1975 · 1 year
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thought about my old house for more than two seconds and almost cried so i did the smart thing and looked at the pictures of it on rightmove to see how the new owners (they have lived there since 2015) have completely ruined it (they redecorated) to the point it's unrecognisable (got an extension) and im literally ugly sobbing about it. they let my mother's garden die
#YOU DONT UNDERSTAND THERE USED TO BE CONIFERS THERE AND I REMEMBER CLIMBING SO FAR UP THEM#AND MY GRANDAD SEEING ME THROUGH THE BRANCHES AND SMILING AT ME AND SAYING 'HELLO' SO SOFTLY#BACK WHEN HE WAS NICE AND I REMEMBER THERE'S A BACK ALLEY BEHIND ALL THE GARDENS ON THE STREET#THAT YOU CANT SEE IN THE PHOTOS AND ME AND THE TWO BOYS NEAR ME USED TO SPEND HOURS AND HOURS#RUNNING ABOUT AND GETTING DIRTY AND BREAKING INTO THE NEIGHBOURS' GARDENS AND GETTING IN TROUBLE#AND NOW ONE IS IN A MILITARY SCHOOL BECAUSE HIS PARENTS GREW SCARED OF HIM#AND THE OTHER GOT INVOLVED IN GANGS AND GOT CAUGHT WITH A KNIFE IN SCHOOL BUT I SAW HIM AT THE LOCAL A FEW MONTHS AGO#AND HE'S STILL ONE OF THE SOFTEST BOYS IVE EVER MET AND HE SMILED AND SAID HE WAS GLAD I WAS DOING WELL#AND I REMEMBER RUNNING UP THE STAIRS WHEN MY MUM WAS ANGRY AND I REMEMBER RUNNING DOWN THE DRIVE#WHEN MY DAD CAME HOME AND I REMEMBER MY OLD DOG AND HOW MY MUM EXPLAINED THE NAMES BEHIND EVERY ROSE#I REMEMBER BEING SCARED OF THE CELLAR AND I REMEMBER LEARNING TO PLAIT MY OWN HAIR ON THE STAIRS#BECAUSE MY SISTER REFUSED TO TEACH ME AND I REMEMBER HOW COLD THE ATTIC WAS#I REMEMBER SLEEPING IN MY MUM'S BED AND I REMEMBER THE CAT DYING#I REMEMBER CLOSING MY EYES SO TIGHTLY BECAUSE I THOUGHT ID SEE SANTA AND THAT MEANT HE WOULDNT COME#I REMEMBER CRYING IN THE BATHROOM WHEN MY SISTER TOLD ME THE EASTER BUNNY WASNT REAL#I REMEMBER MY MUM BRUSHING MY HAIR IN THE KITCHEN BEFORE SCHOOL AND I REMEMBER HOW WE PAINTED THE WALLS#THAT'S MY HOUSE IT'S BUILT FROM ME AND NOW I CANT EVEN RECOGNISE IT#THAT WAS THE LAST PLACE I WAS TRULY HAPPY NOTHING BAD HAD EVER HAPPENED TO ME#AND NOW IT'S FOREIGN TO ME#im about to start dry-heaving this is evil and sick and twisted childhood homes come with their own ache i think#hella goes home#<- not quite but v much fits that tag
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