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fantroll-purgatory · 5 years

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World: Alternia

Name: Eunoma Lesedi

(The Greek goddess of law and legislation, name translates to good order/governance according to good laws + the word for light in South African)

Age: 9.5 sweeps

Theme/Story: Law/Politics/Mutation? I think I just thought it was a cool idea for a mutation and liked the backstory I came up with for her

She is a rare fuchsia with an even rarer mutation, which would under normal circumstances entitle her to a culling. That is had she not been taken pity on by her mother. She had no idea why she showed her such kindness. It was probably a combination of the similarity of her look to that of the rainbow drinker and the opportunity for the mother to insure a proper ruler was raised for a change. She was raised in the caverns by her jade guardian with other jades acting as sisters but now that she is old enough to take care of herself she has been sent off to live in an old abandoned desert hive which long ago belonged to a jadeblood who raised a virgin mother grub like Kanaya. It is deep enough in that sandy deathtrap that she doesn’t have to worry about anyone finding her. It gets pretty lonely and she misses her mom and sisters but it also allows her to focus on her work and studies. (There is A L O T going on in this backstory, but I think it’s kind of workable? I think there needs to be considerable intent in why she was saved, however. This isn’t the kind of thing a Jade (especially not many of them) would do lightly. Eunoma might not learn why yet, but there has to be a motivation, a goal they’re trying to achieve. Perhaps the Fuschia blood is part of it? Maybe they’re some Jades who wanna stage a full on rebellion and want to use her as a figurehead? An albino Fuschia taking down the Condesce would be a potent political symbol.)

Goals: One of my ancient OCs I wanted to fix up but turns out I need some help! So a general overview/everything (Alright, here we go!) (As a heads up, I took pity on you and am not deleting the other trolls you submitted in rapid succession, but for future reference- please don’t do that.)

Strife Specibus: 3dentkind

(Uses a trident she made herself with the help of her mother) (I’m really getting “Raised to be a political symbol” out of this. Why would she be raised to be just like an Heiress if there wasn’t a purpose behind it? Logically she’d otherwise be raised to be more Jade than anything.)

Fetch Modus: Idk honestly

Blood Color: Fuchsia

Symbol and Meaning: Pira, Sing of the Visionary

Handle: luminousJurist

Quirk: Ta|k in a ca|m yet cønfident vøice. (Proper punctuation, replaces L with | and O with ø) (Like this. Simple is often the way to go.)

Special Abilities: Her mutation, which would best be described as form of albinism that mimics rainbow drinker looks and abilities (meaning she can stay out in the sun) (hmmmmHMMMM I am unsure how exactly this would work- Kanaya could just go out in the sun before she was a Rainbowdrinker. I guess you can just handwave it as “unlocking dormant parts of the Fuschia genome” or something. Trolls have a tenuous link to biology as it is.)

Lusus/Guardian: Raised by a jadeblood in the caverns with other jades acting as her sisters before she left, mainly because she was always presented as a mutant jadeblood (which is also why she is hiding her sign, wearing it as a necklace under her shirt) by her mother in order to have her be more accepted (My main gripe with this is that it’s very unlikely, unless she never really interacted with the other Jades, that they wouldn’t know she’s not a Jade. Troll tears are tinted, and wrigglers are highly pigmented. Also all it would take is a slight cut and the jig is up. I think you’ve got to make them more complicit in the hiding and raising if this backstory is gonna come off as plausible.)

Interests: The crime, mystery and legal drama genres, whether it be books, movies, shows or games. She is also fascinated by law and the legal system and she loves studying about it, writing reforms and planning how to bring justice and order into Alternia when she claims the throne. Calligraphy is also something she finds fun to do while brainstorming. Her only non work related hobby is collecting plushies. (I like this a lot. I bet she reads about Redglare and gets mad all the time. Maybe she’s a big Summoner fangirl? He was a mutant who raised a rebellion against the culling system.) (I’d ordinarily recommend having more hobbies that aren’t “work” related, but given your character’s history, it makes a lot more sense for her to be fixated on it, even if she doesn’t realize that quite yet.)

Personality: Eunoma is obsessed over making the right decision and being a fair and just ruler. She has first hand seen and felt the cruelty of Alternia and while she is honest to a fault and rather blunt, she does this not to hurt feelings but because she feels it is the right thing to do. She is pushing herself into indifference and molding herself into the perfect middle man, erasing any opinion which might sway her judgement. Still she is disciplined and harsh, mainly on herself but also others, a strict believer in following rules to the letter and always scrutinizing her own actions. She thinks she can always do better, a perfectionist to whom nothing will probably ever be enough. She is uptight and antisocial, awful at working and even just talking with other trolls, as social cues tend to go over her head and even her own emotions very much confuse her, not to mention those of others. But on the other hand lies and motivations are something she understands and sees through all too well. She is good at predicting what people will do and spotting a liar or faker from a mile away. (We got a Mind player here! I’ll talk more about this later but you’ve got a solid character written in here. But I think you’ve got something mixed up in here: You open saying that she’s opinionated and blunt, but latter say she’s indifferent and grey-aligned?) (I think you meant “impartial” as in, “having no bias”, though. Which would make a lot more sense. Obsessed with being equal- having a character flaw of not quite getting the difference between Equal and Fair would help flesh her out, especially given that she’s right at the age where she’d be viscerally learning that difference.) (I think “follows the rules to the letter” is a little... odd? For someone who’s only course of action on the current law system would be to die messily. I think her having her own code of ethics that she strictly follows would be much better (especially with her classpect) than being a blind rules follower. She’s a path-maker, not a path-walker!)

Lunar Sway: Prospit (I think an interest in that “genetic destiny” thing that Trolls love would do her some good with this. Get her a little more going with the flow, taking threads of the past and weaving them into changes today. Seeing herself a bit in The Sufferer and The Summoner and other ancient rebellions would do her a lot of good, I think. Give her some motivation.)

Title: Mage of Mind

(She suffers form being an overly logical outcast and needs to learn to not only let loose but also let people in, she is way too defensive from having to hide her whole life and needs to learn to open up and allow herself to feel emotions) (I do think Mage is the way to go with her. The Active Knower, the Leader and Shepherd as opposed to Seer, the Teller and Teacher. She’s someone who NEEDS to get up on her soapbox and tell the world that this isn’t how it has to be, that we can make other choices, and she’s making those choices right now.) (Pathwise, I think she needs a bit more spirit of her own. Her Dolorosa-stand in needs a firmer hand in her development if she is to grow as well. There needs to be an interplay of “I know you THINK you know what’s right, Mother, but I KNOW what needs to be done, and I’m going to DO IT my way” by the end of her arc.)

Land: Land of Forums and Debate

(The Denizen has devided the people of her land and pinned them against each other. With corrupt politicians, censorship and high tension in the air, this whole place is one wrong word away from a civil war. It is her job to fix the corrupt system, unify the people of the land again and open up constructive discussion.) (She’s gotta win the arguments and lead the people! A pale girl in a world of fountains and marble! It’s pretty classic, but it fits her development as already-being-half-there on her Classpect, but needing the extra push to really do it.) (This was a much easier review than I expected, my comments are mostly for guiding this vision of her to completion as opposed to full overhauls. You’re most of the way there!) -SA

#fuchsiablood #tyrianblood #seadweller #submission #SA Review

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