#shsjdjdjjs sorry im just gonna rant in the tags here

[ijustwantagoodurl]

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#shsjdjdjjs sorry im just gonna rant in the tags here #dont bother reading this or anything i just need to vent a bit #my back hurts and i sometimes cant breath and theres always this Lump in my throat when i try to eat #and i Have been eating my regular two meals a day but theyve been getting smaller and smaller and that worries me #i LOST my coffeecup in this house somewhere which makes me sad #dad seems pretty shaken up by Something and theyre both gonna b gone for most of this month #i am BEHIND on applying for colleges i should already b applying and not still searching #i havent done laundry in a while and i feel bad for my binders #SPEAKING OF im takin this week off of binding and im on my period which SUCKS ASS but i gotta take a week off sometime this month #ive only told tim but it turns out that teles has a gf? and theyve been goin for a month but somethin struck me as off?? idk tho #maybe i just wanted something to seem off when he was talking abt her #i think im taking it p well #also asdrubal is staying with us for a Month and its interestig feeling Put Off by being gendered in spanish bc it can just seem like #like i forgot spanish rules when i call myself a ingenierO instead of inginerA and thats somethin #raine is in my thursday Gay Group at school which is interesting #i dont have a therapist yet but my parents still seem to busy to bother asking #i recently realized that i have a lot of people who consider me a friend but only a few who /i/ consider a friend #cuz theres tim aleK chels #amber i guess? #maddy but idk if shes even in town any more and shes not the type to just chat #id say teles but were not at a Comfortable Talking stage yet so #idk its bc i listen and care abt what people say and thats a Lot more than most will do for others ig?? #maybe its just bc all my potential friends are teens???? idk tho it seems ridiculous to b snobby and be like tEeNs when im still one ya kno #magic seems to be crawling back into my life and at this point in time im too tired to try and stop it or fight it #my shoulders are sore and in pain #ive set a reminder for tomorrow tho to treat myself and buy things for myself #im gonna bother chels abt that nice ass pen she has and buy myself some records and new binders #maybe ill bike over to a bank and put all my cash into my account?? #i wish i had the strength to get rid of all the things i hoard #aleX texted today bc they were having a panic attack but i was at work and they were being manipulative towards tim yesterday and idk