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#so feel free to queue this for when you want
Updates, Apologies, and Moving Forward!
Hello everyone! I am not dead, and this blog is not dead. I know I've been gone for a very long time again, and I'm very sorry.
I had to say goodbye to my cat, my emotional support animal, my baby. I won't say too much here, but she was suffering, and unfortunately there was nothing that could be done. My mental health is fragile at the best of times, and while I am okay and safe, it has been a difficult few months for me. I am also a full-time college student with a job, so all of my free hours were spent in grief. It's taken me a while to feel alright enough to come back, but here I am. I'm still passionate about queer representation in media, and I want to continue to share queer characters with the tumblr community. Starting tomorrow, I will resume the 8 times a day posting schedule that I was starting to utilize before my disappearance, as queueing posts makes my life much easier. I'm sorry if I don't respond to notes or asks left during my break. It's a lot to sort through and I value community engagement on this blog more than anything but I am just one person and I can only do so much. Feel free to re-send asks! Going forward, I'll be making a few changes. I am working on a publicly available google sheet of all characters that have been posted on this blog with results that I will link in a visible place so that people wanting to submit a character can (hopefully) quickly search to make sure that character hasn't been posted yet. I also will eventually be looking for another mod, although that will not be until the summer and I will make more posts when the time comes. I will personally be awol for the last few weeks of may and the first few weeks of june due to a job opportunity out of the country, but I am intending to have queued posts continuing to upload at the regular schedule during that time. Unfortunately this means I won't be able to edit mistakes or answer questions, but hopefully any issues can be addressed when I return. Thank you all for your patience, I'm sorry that this radio silence has gone on for so long, but I've thought about this blog a lot during my absence and I'm certain that it's not a project I'm giving up on any time soon.
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jascurka · 1 year
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Szczęśliwego Nowego Roku! | Happy New Year!
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malewifehenrycooldown · 5 months
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I was going to write up a post about my ship with Android 18 but then realised I had to explain the whole 'But what about Krillin?!' question. So here's a meme I quickly put together to demonstrate how the ship works.
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thecodeveronica · 6 days
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Oh boy, Dead by Daylight patch time tomorrow. You know what that means! Time for me to unreasonably get my hopes up for new RE skins to be in the datamine and then feel the crushing disappointment when they aren't!
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mirror-ralsei · 7 months
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laesas · 1 year
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Fucking hell. In what universe is it appropriate to compare real life allegations of abuse to an entertainment reality show. Unreal.
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@defectivexfragmented​ liked this post for a motorbike starter! 🏍️
   Eyes flick over towards Michael, following the line of his gaze to land on the protective covering draped over his motorbike, the bottom half of the wheels plainly showing what sits beneath the fabric. Erik doesn’t drive the bike as much as he used to, but then as Emma (probably correctly) complains on a regular basis, he is becoming something of a hermit.
   “Ever ridden one before?” A nod towards the bike, just so his meaning can’t be mistaken.
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mythvoiced · 2 years
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-. PSA | TENTATIVE FACECLAIM CHANGE Patrick Finch
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Chris Wood | Cillian Murphy
#;ooc#;psa#the wolf;about#i hate him because Cillian is perfect he's got EVERYTHING Patrick has DOWN to the facial expressions he's capable of portraying#never mind the most glaring thing i needed which is those eyes of his and what he does with them the ice cold starkness#his FACIAL STRUCTURE is perfect. did you read that? HIS ENTIRE facial structure i want to throw myself into the mississippi#but it's not as though i will ever be satisfied OH NO i literally never fully like any fc choice i make for Patrick#i've settled and will continue to settle when it's about any other muse because YESH this is the perfect one or YESH this is absolutely#valid and good enough but NOT Patrick has to be a BITCH at all times and I hate him ♥#ANYWAYS feel free to pls ignore the ramblings in the tag for some reason doing stuff with Patrick makes me self-conscious#like how i will be changing his fricking HAIR COLOUR after 9 YEARS of making him a blonde#i'll just make it slightly darker i don't actually mind it all that much i was dissatisfied with his hair for a hot minute now so#WHAT BETTER OPPORTUNITY THAN THIS ♥ this may seem odd but nonsense like this re: patrick is a bit deal to me#he's that muse yknow? The one if you catch my draft IF YOU'VE GONE LIKE IT YOU KNOW YOU KNOW#also what's up i'm changing so many faceclaims what's happening#even his height works lmao Patrick is Not aggressively tall let me tell you that#I'LL ALSO be making some minor adjustments to Patrick's life AS Patrick meaning the part of his bio that is exclusively PAt#;queue
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shunsuiken · 2 months
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DON’T FORGET WHO’S TAKING YOU HOME (and in whose arms you’re gonna be).
pairing(s). kaeya, childe, ayato, kaveh, neuvillette x fem!reader
genre. fluff
wc. 200-400 for each character
an. AND SING WITH ME 🎤🎤 SO DARLING SAVE THE LAST DANCE FOR MEEE michael buble literally left no crumbs with this song i had to write about it omg + ALSO happy valentines day everyone !!! i may not have a valentine this year but im happy to post this for anybody feeling a little lonely today !! you are so so loved okay ?!!! come and collect a kiss from me before reading on 💋 MUAH have a lovely valentines day !!! <33
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kaeya alberich
you’re really good at hiding, kaeya thinks to himself with a huff and a smile on his lips. searching all over the plaza for you was making him break a sweat in his navy blue tuxedo. with another turn around the corner he decides to remove his tuxedo jacket for the time being, folding it over his arm to carry instead.
“no, no, no klee! stop it! you can’t play with your things here, if you blow things up-”
“-master jean will put me in solitary confinement…”
oho, kaeya recognises these two voices very well. he finds it so hilarious that at the end, his feet lead him right to you! not even a single thought was processed as he turned the corner two seconds ago but here you are.
he hides behind the large potted plant, listening to the conversation you and the beloved spark knight share. he stays there until it becomes quiet between you two.
“kaeya, you peacock, i know it’s you.”
kaeya lets out a baffled noise, finally showing himself from behind the plant, offended by the ridiculous nickname you gave him. “snowflake, how dare you?”
“klee, don’t eavesdrop on people like this man when you grow older, yeah?” you point animatedly at your lover, who’s folding his arms and scoffing at you.
klee only giggles, nodding her head. “i gotta go find albedo now!” you watch as she skips off towards the plaza, waving goodbye.
you then turn towards your next problem that stands behind you. “i thought you were out dancing?”
“i was, but they’ll start playing the last dance soon and how can my last dance not be with you?” your lover walks towards you, pulling you closer by your waist with his free arm. you immediately wrap your arms around his neck, smiling softly at his intentions.
you hear an announcement echoing from the plaza before you can reply, and you figure it might have been mika because of how timid the voice sounded.
“good evening everyone, please bring all your friends and company over for the last dance of the night!”
“sounds like our queue.” you slide your arms off his shoulder to grab his hand, pulling him with you without warning.
“oh snowflake, hold on-” kaeya almost trips on air and the sounds of your laughter bounce off the concrete floor and walls as you drag him down the staircase leading to the plaza.
childe
you can never refuse ajax’s request for a dance, because he won’t take no for an answer. especially when it comes to dancing. your feet hurt so much. you’re so ready to just fall on top of your bed and go to sleep. but the only thing that keeps you wide awake, heart pumping and everything is the look on your lover's face.
his gaze usually has this inhumane and dull look to them, but you find that whenever he looks at you or when he participates in something he loves, his gaze finally twinkles. it works so miraculously too. like all of a sudden life was returned to him and he could see.
the smile on your lips grows when you think about this. you think it’s sweet how you’re one of the reasons that the life in his eyes returns.
ajax notices the tighter grip you hold on his forearm, making his lips curl in curiosity. “what’s going on in your head, baby?”
you zone in on the situation, you’re still dancing, and you shake your head in response. “nothing, ajax.” you want to keep your thoughts to yourself but when ajax smiles at you like that, with the most expectant look on his face, you can’t help yourself. “actually, i just thought about the dance.”
he twirls you around to the music before connecting arms with you again. “you just thought about the dance?” his brow quirks in amusement.
“no, no not like that,” you say with a sheepish chuckle before continuing, “i just thought that this number is the longest one so far.”
“well of course,” ajax responds with an eye smile. “it’s the last song.”
“it… is?” you look up at ajax while trying to fight the urge to look anywhere else.
if this is the last song… and you’re dancing with him… then that can only mean-
when the choreography allows ajax to pull you against his chest, he leans down so he can whisper in your ear, “you will be my final dance partner tonight.”
kamisato ayato
these few days at fontaine have been strumming the strings of your heart like a guitar—ayato has been spending so much time with you that you’re beginning to think of such ridiculous conclusions. his eyes that linger on your face, his hand that hovers on the small of your back when leading you out of a hall and it’s just these little things that he does with you that makes you want to claw an entire curtain off its rod. one time he even poured you a glass of wine before taking a sip with the same glass—it’s like he’s forgotten he’s the yashiro commissioner!
thoma and ayaka barely bat an eye. but also, they’ve known ayato for much longer than you have since you were a recent (and lovely) addition to the little family. so… perhaps this is just how he acts?
“uh-huh, when he’s courting someone that is.”
the sentence that thoma said offhandedly is the only thing that rings through your mind. but your thoughts must’ve shone through your expression because ayato is quick on his feet to smoothly guide you off the dance floor, gloved hand still holding yours as he brings you to a less crowded area—the balcony.
“you appeared to be distracted, that’s why i pulled us away,” ayato breaks the silence and your train of thoughts.
he’s still holding my hand—is what you’re repeating in your head. your eyes can barely focus on a single object within your field of vision. your bottom lip quivers at the revelation you’re carefully starting to uncover.
“i am not distracted,” you inhale sharply when you accidentally meet ayato’s gaze. “i…” your brows crease as you try to get words out of your mouth.
ayato brings your hand up to his lips, placing a chaste kiss on the back of your hand and you can physically feel the blood rush up to your fingertips. “would my lady like to return to the hotel?”
your voice leaves your throat in but a hoarse whisper, “what did you just call me?”
you hear a chuckle from ayato and it makes you snap your head around in embarrassment. this new term of endearment rolls off his tongue way too easily, the rascal must have been practicing!
“oh no, no, no, my lady, you must look at me,” a grin appears on ayato’s face at your attempts to hide your expression and when he finally gets you to look at him, you’re caged between his arms.
“why would you call me that?” you whine at his teasing.
“well i just couldn’t keep it to myself anymore,” ayato murmurs, a dust of pink decorating his cheeks. “will you allow me to call you that?”
kaveh
three hours. it’s been three hours since you and kaveh decided to learn a cute couples dance routine ‘for funsies’. whose idea was this again? weren’t you two supposed to be just friends? doesn’t kaveh have a client meeting tomorrow that he should be preparing for?
“so we do this—then this and then we’re supposed to oh—!”
the silence is deafening. the song playing in the background fades as you both stare at each other, even mirroring the same expression. eyes as wide as saucers. lips just inches from connection.
kaveh’s breath fans over your lips and you can hear the audible gulp he makes at the closeness. he’s also entirely aware that the red in his cheeks has reached his ears by now. while you, on the other hand, have started hearing the percussion of your heart in your own eardrums.
“o-oh…” your legs are frozen in place and hang on a second, why haven’t either of you let go?
his hand is respectfully sat on your waist, while the other is occupied holding your hand. you hear him inhale and it grabs your attention before you can get anymore lost in his gaze. his gaze observes your lovely face, eyes flickering from one feature to another as he whispers, “has anybody ever told you you’re pretty up close?”
you shake your head ever so slightly. “no.”
kaveh likes this answer, humming as he ponders for a moment.
your eyes sparkle when that handsome smile of his appears on his lips. he chuckles shortly at your expression, your palm feels so warm when connected with his.
“i’m glad i’m the first to tell you.”
neuvillette
“oh dear, neuvillette,” you chuckle softly, walking towards him as he takes another sip of his water. he stands in a more secluded corner of the hall, briefly greeting guests with a nod of the head. which is why he stands out like a sore thumb—arctic white hair, designer blue suit and a piercing gaze.
but that gaze doesn’t fool you. the dragon sovereign is probably pondering on retiring for the night and is only still present to keep up with appearances.
“yes, lady y/n?” it’s to nobody’s surprise that he heard you from metres away.
when he turns around, your eyes immediately land on the problem you’ve sensed since you returned from the dancefloor.
“your tie,” you reply, standing in front of his figure, nonchalantly raising your hands in preparation to adjust the garment. “will you allow me to fix it?”
the gears in neuvillette’s mind pause abruptly at your question. he certainly has no problem readjusting his own tie. his hands aren’t holding anything else other than his cup of water—which he can definitely put down on a nearby table!
but why can’t he bring himself to say no?
the ‘of course’ leaves his lips faster than he would have liked, but that’s no matter, your expression shows no sign of displeasure. instead, he watches your sweet smile brighten.
when your fingers reach the tie, neuvillette notices how you tiptoe to reach him. so he does what any normal person would do—he leans down.
it catches you off guard, the tips of your fingers just slightly grazing against his neck in the process. you profusely apologise in whispers to which neuvillette can only chuckle at.
“it is no trouble lady y/n, i appreciate the kind gesture.” the corner of neuvillette’s lips curve, his hands neatly tucked behind him as he allows you to redo his tie.
neuvillette’s lips only seem to further break into a smile as he watches you pat on the tie in completion.
“there, all finished.” you look up at the iudex, chuckling, “you ought to learn how to do this yourself.”
neuvillette hums, “perhaps you could teach me.” he takes your hand, gently brushing his lips against your knuckles before kissing it. “but for now a dance shall suffice, would you care to join me?”
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cheaploafs · 2 years
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hi hi! i did not realize that anon feature was off, it’s on now!
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luveline · 2 years
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𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 | 𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫  
part one | part two | part three
summary you’re a single mom living three trailers down. eddie thinks you’re the prettiest girl he’s ever seen. queue lunch break visits, rocky road ice cream, a too-big bouquet, and the rainbow connection.
warnings teen mom!reader, fem!reader, r is junie’s birth mother, fluff, hurt/comfort, eddie being a total girl dad (<3), mutual pining, yearning etc, tw for not having much money, general mom struggles :(, slowburn friends to lovers, tw talk of dying (and past lives)
𓆩❤︎𓆪
You're dozing against the back wall in the kitchen when Benny clears his throat. The grease back here while he's cooking tends to get pretty thick and you're tired to begin with. It's a recipe for nodding off. 
Flinching into a proper standing position, you give your boss an apologetic smile. "What?" you ask, blinking hard. 
"Your boy's here." 
"My boy?" 
"Curly hair, tattoos. Looks like he hasn't showered this week. Or any week, actually." Benny laughs, a chesty, self-satisfied chuckle. 
You rush to his side, careful of the spitting hot grill, and follow his gaze out of the kitchen window. Eddie's about two seconds away from opening the glass door, clad in his smart work uniform. 
"He's not my boy," you say. 
Benny scrapes his spatula across the grill's bubbling surface and flips a burger. "If he's the reason you're tired today, you can consider him banned. He's ruining my best waitress." 
"I'm your only waitress." The door opens. Eddie stops in the doorway and casts his gaze around the room. You hide behind the wall and fuss with your hair. "And no, he's not keeping me up. It's Junie." Isn't it always Junie? She's your baby and you adore her, but that doesn't mean she's getting any easier to handle. The terrible twos are persevering with a ferocity you can't quite withstand, or at the very least sleep through. 
"He eating?" Benny asks. 
"I'll go find out." 
You wipe the oil from your nose and grimace as you walk out into the actual seating area of the diner. It's empty but for one person and Eddie, who grins when he sees you. 
"Hey, sweet thing." 
You try not to show how much you like being called 'sweet thing'. Your face must betray you somehow because Eddie's grin turns smug and he approaches until he's basically stepping on your toes. 
"How's it hanging?"
You snort. "Benny asked if you're eating." 
"What's today's special?" 
"Cheeseburger." 
He fixes your shirt collar. You can feel the warmth of his fingers and the cooler metal of a ring grace your throat. "Yeah, I'm eating." 
You report back to Benny with his order and find the cook's already added two burgers to the grill. He points his spatula at the now grilled and constructed burger for Darren. If you hadn't taken it you'd still know who's it was; Benny's regulars are loyal to a fault. The same old guys come in here day in and day out, and they all want the same thing. 
Quarter pounders. 
You take it, twist around a childish Eddie trying to trip you up and deliver it to Darren, a frowny-faced farm-hand that Benny swears is a nice guy deep down. You've yet to dig far enough. 
Eddie tries to trip you up again when you come back. You glare at him, stepping on his toes gently – more a threat than a real show of aggression – and disappear again through the kitchen door.
"So." Benny throws down a basket of fries before moving to the chopping board with a fresh tomato in hand. "He's your boyfriend?" 
"Do we have to do this?" you ask, joining him at the chopping board. You try to snag a slice of tomato and are quickly tutted away. 
"Is he?" 
"No," you say, trying again for some tomato. 
"Kid, if you don't wait." 
You pout and set back on your heels. 
The burgers sizzle. Benny throws a slice of cheese over Eddie's and lets it melt. Quicker than you can believe, Benny constructs two burgers and fills a red plastic basket with fries. 
He offers them to you. "Lunch break." 
Free food. You smile at him sheepishly and try to take them. He pulls his arms back.
"Wha-" 
"If he's your boyfriend, you better tell me now." 
"Benny, I don't know if you know this, but I'm an adult. Already got knocked up once." 
"And where is he now?" 
Chastised, you mumble, "He's not my boyfriend," and Benny finally hands over the food. He looks like he might try to ruffle your hair if you stick around, so you knock open the kitchen door with your hip and make a speedy exit. 
"What's with the face?" Eddie asks as you sit, reaching for the hot plate balancing across your forearm.
"I think Benny just tried to give me a dad talk." 
He laughs like this is the funniest thing he's ever heard. "Really? What did he say?" 
You shake your head. That's not a bag of worms you're interested in delving into right now. Your brains too fried, and the food smells great. Your stomach aches with hunger. 
"You want a coke?" you ask. 
Eddie stands up. "I'll get them. Sit down, okay?"
You sit down and shove a greedy handful of fries into your mouth, turning in your seat to watch Eddie talk.
He leans over the metal ledge of the kitchen window. It's quiet enough to hear him laugh, hear him say, "No, sir," in a tone that borders sarcastic. 
He wields a five dollar bill at Benny, who shoots him down.
"Put it in the Junie jar," Benny says. 
"Junie jar?" Eddie questions, though he's smiling. 
Your eyebrows furrow at the expression. You've never heard it either. 
"I don't bother pretending she spends it on anything else."
"You got that right." 
You flush with heat all the way to to the tips of your ears and turn back to the table before Eddie can catch you watching. 
He throws himself into his seat like he's collapsed. The twin cokes in his hands upheave and then splash back into themselves, an impressive and ridiculous show of skill that makes you gasp. 
"For you." He shoves a glass down next to you. The ice cubes clink. 
"Thank you," you say, and don't waste any time digging into your food.
He squints at your eager eating, though he waits until you've taken the worlds biggest bite of your burger before he asks, "Hungry?" 
You swallow before you mean to and have to take a big sip of your drink to avoid choking to death. "I didn't eat breakfast." 
"How come?" 
You can't take his concern. Your eyes drop this hand where it picks through fries, no rings in sight. He’d told you once he can’t wear them at work, because he gets really warm and the rings are costume jewellery. His hands look bare without them, but they’re very nice hands. You follow the stark line of a bone down from his knuckles and focus in on his simple wrist watch as you explain. 
"It took me an hour to get her to finish a slice of toast this morning. I usually wouldn’t make her finish, but she's not eating well." 
You don't have to say who. Eddie tips his head back to eat a handful of fries like a courtesan eating grapes, all grandness. 
"Teething?" 
"She has all her teeth already," you say. A laugh bubbles up, delighted at his suggestion. 
"What do you think it is?" 
You wipe the corner of your mouth with a napkin and shrug. Eddie sees straight through your forced nonchalance. 
"No, seriously. What do you think?" 
"I don't know. Maybe she's gonna come down with the flu. She didn't sleep all night either, and…" You rub your tired eyes with the backs of your hands. "I don't know. I hope she's feeling better at pick up, but I doubt it." 
"How are you feeling?" He says 'you' softly, almost crooning. 
"Tired, Eds." 
"I can see that." 
The door opens and a breeze whips your ankles. You hide them further under the table and cringe when you kick Eddie straight in the foot. He only raises his eyebrow at you and kicks you back. "What's your problem?" he mumbles under his breath, smiling. 
When the burgers are gone and there's only a couple of cold fries left, you and Eddie fall into conversation about tonight. He's finally playing a gig after months without one, and you're riddled with guilt. 
"I wish I could come," you tell him, feeling gutted that you won't see him in action. 
You wonder what he looks like on stage. Sometimes it's hard to coalesce the Eddie you know and the other Eddie, rocker Eddie. He's so sweet. The image of him on stage and sweating, rocking out, you can't summon it. 
You clear your throat. "I'm sorry we can't." 
Eddie shakes his head quickly, fingers playing with the chain around his left wrist. "Don't worry about it. Junebugs's gotta sleep. You gotta sleep." 
You pick at your nails, shame-faced. If you were a good friend you'd go and see him perform, but you're a good mom so you can't. Maybe you could get a sitter… only you don't trust anybody to look after her. Not the way you would. And people can be evil.
Maybe I could take her to the Hideout, you think tentatively.
You couldn't. It's too loud, it's too rowdy. You're not sure they'd even let you in with a baby. 
"Sorry," you say again, dropping your cheek into your palm. 
Eddie doesn't smile. He turns his wrist, the back of his hand to the table and his palm open between you. 
"Don't be sorry," he says. He watches your face and slowly, slowly, mischief creeps into his expression. "How about I give you a private show?" 
Your breath catches in your throat. 
"You and June've never heard me play. I could bring an amp. June can play drums. You'll sing." 
His allocation shocks you out of your thoughts. "Why can't you sing?" 
"What will you do, then? If I sing?"
You flounder.
He lifts his coke to his lips and smirks at your silence. "Exactly." 
"Eddie, I can't sing." 
He waves his hand at you rather than answer. 
"I won't sing." 
"Oh, you won't?" he asks, tone enough to make you cross your legs under the table. He rolls his eyes. 
"No. Let Junie do it. She's always singing." 
"And you'll-? What?"  
You shrug. He imitates you, over-exaggerated enough to make you gasp a laugh.
“Is that supposed to be me?"  
He ignores your question in favour of his own. "You'll do nothing. Typical." 
"You're getting too big for your boots, Munson," you warn, sliding his plate on top of yours. 
He stacks your empty glasses. The two of you stand and linger. He should go back to work. You should too.
"I'll come over tomorrow?" he asks finally. 
"Okay." You look over him in his clean clothes and neater than usual hair and can't help smiling. "I'll see you tomorrow," you say quietly, opening your arms just slightly. 
Eddie takes the hint and wraps his arms quickly around your shoulders, careful of the plates in your hand. He rubs them once, a good, grounding pressure across the breadth of your back. Your nose presses against his neck. He smells like aftershave and cigarette smoke and skin. 
Before you know it he's pulling away, the end to an amicable embrace between friends. Almost disappointing, not quite what you want anymore, but a relief and a comfort all the same. 
He chucks your chin. "Tell Junie I miss her." 
"I will."
"Okay." He turns to walk away. "Bye, sweetheart," he shoots over his shoulder. 
"Bye!" you call. 
The door shudders in his wake. You stand there watching until Benny clears his throat pointedly and asks you to come and make some more coffee. 
You rush through the rest of the day. You finish earlier than you should because Benny's in a gracious mood, thrusting your tip jar into your arms with a command to get some sleep. You promise you'll try your best and head out for the daycare. 
Junie's asleep in a bean bag by the baby gate when you get there. You stop dead in your tracks. She has her shoes and coat on already, her backpack in her lap. You look up at the childcare worker in charge today, a nice lady called Deborah, quizzically. 
"She's been like that for an hour. I'm sorry we couldn't keep her awake." 
You pout at Junie. "Why she got her coat on?" 
"She insisted. Screamed bloody murder. Think she was excited to see you," she says, smiling softly. 
You smile in return. "Thank you, Deborah. Have a nice weekend.”
Deborah nods and disappears back into the play room. You open the baby gate with likely less dexterity than you should have as a mom and drop to your knees in front of the beanbag, careful not to make too much noise. You're wondering if you can carry her to the car without waking her up when her foot moves, then her arms. They fall to her side as her eyes open. 
"Hey, baby," you say, feeling weirdly emotional. She looks so lovely and pretty, and if she's sick that's gonna pluck your heart strings (and cause a boat load of problems). 
"Mommy," she mumbles, eyes bleary.
"That's me." You reach out to squeeze her little thigh. "My poor girl, what's the matter? Does your tummy hurt?" you ask carefully.
She blinks. 
"Why're you sitting here all by yourself? You didn't want to play with Adrien? Or Lucy?"
When she doesn't reply you take her backpack and thread your hand through the strap, offering your open arms to her. She can barely sit up, her movements slow and sluggish. 
"Here," you murmur, sliding your hands under her armpits and pulling her into your chest. 
She finally smiles, hands bunched up at the collar of your shirt. You leave some room to look at her and she looks at you. You're surprised she's not whining or crying. 
"Hey," you say again, amazed at her droopy smile. "You look like you've had a good day." 
Her head drops forward. You think she's nodding, though that might be wishful thinking. You don't even know if toddlers can nod. 
Of course they can nod, you think to yourself scathingly. I mean… can they? 
And Junie isn't like most toddlers. She hasn't really done anything by the book. She meets milestones when she wants to, sometimes early, sometimes really, really late. 
You pat her back, her nylon coat crinkly under your hand. "Ready to go home?" 
You stand up with her clutched to your chest. Usually you'd have her say goodbye to Deborah or the other daycare workers but Junie doesn't look like she knows her own name right now. You frown at her and encourage her forehead against your chin, trying to gauge if she's a little warmer than usual. 
"I missed you," you tell her honestly. You miss her every single day. "I want to know everything you did today. Do you remember what you did?"
Junie pushes against your chest with her hand as you walk out of the daycare centre and into the parking lot. 
"Did you do… colouring? Or… building blocks? Did you sing?" you ask, grinning. 
You cross the road, and when you look back she's staring at you, straight into your eyes. 
"Hi," you say with a laugh. 
Her hands rise to your face, fingers thankfully clean and warm against your wind-bitten cheeks. You slow, gazing down at her expectantly. She raises her chin as high as she can and smiles big. 
"You want a kiss. I can tell," you croon smugly. 
She kisses you. It's a little drooly as baby kisses always are, but it's the best thing that's happened to you all day. It's always so surprising when she initiates affection. That she loves you just as much as you love her. 
You steal another kiss. 
"Guess what?" you ask, reaching a hand to stroke a little baby hair back. 
She says a word that isn't real. It sounds like 'mod'. 
"It's payday today, which means…" You beam at her. "Ice cream!" 
That grabs her attention. 
-
Eddie can't believe it. "You had what without me?" he asks over the phone. 
Junie herds your knees, arms around your legs and face turned to the TV. You stand slumped against the wall where your phone is plugged, curling the landline's coiled cord around your finger so Junie can't grab it. 
"Ice cream," you supply helpfully. 
His voice isn't easy to understand. The Hideout is a very loud place. Eddie's practically shouting down the line. "I can't believe it." 
"It couldn't be helped. She needed to be tempted." 
"Tempted! Has she eaten anything else?" 
You look down at the girl in question and reach down to rub her back. "Oh yeah. She ate like, an entire bag of lays, one of the big ones. She still smells like honey barbecue." 
"Nothing else?" 
You sigh, that creeping, ringing thought edging in. You're a bad mom. 
"I made her cereal, and celery sticks and sandwiches and little cut up peaches and- and she won't touch any of it," you say, like you're promising. Your tone begs to be believed.
There's a loud racket. Eddie shouts, "What did you say? I can't hear you!" 
You repeat yourself. You miss the start of what he's saying, but you catch, "-not your fault! She's probably just having a moment. You remember when she kept throwing her bottle? She doesn't do that anymore." 
You nod. "Yeah, maybe it's like that. She's figuring she has choices." Not the best timing for your kid to decide she's gonna get picky. 
"Exactly! Or maybe she is sick. Does she look sick?"
You look back down at Junie and feel across her smooth forehead for the twentieth time today. "She doesn't feel warm." 
"Good. I'm sure she-" You miss the rest. 
"I can't hear you," you say with a small laugh. "I can hear the drum kit though. Are you going on soon?"
"I said, 'I'm sure she's fine.' And yeah, couple of minutes." 
"Okay. Um. I'll let you go, then." 
"Okay." A small gap where you think he's hung up, but then, "Can I talk to her?" 
You bite back a smile. "Sure." 
You kneel down. Junie looks a short fall from suspicion, though her arms quickly reach out for a hug.
"June, d'you wanna talk to Eddie?" 
"Eddie?" she asks, turning to the door. 
You catch her hand before she can walk away. "No, babe, on the phone." 
You sit down flat with your legs crossed and encourage her to do the same. She doesn't not want to be encouraged, eyes still trained on the door. 
"Baby," you say, though you're bringing the phone to your mouth as you do. "Are you still there?"
"Yeah, I'm here." 
"Okay, I'm gonna pass her the phone and you're gonna have to talk straight away, because she doesn't know how it works. Alright?"  
"Yeah, alright. Bring on the junebug." 
You press the phone to Junie's ear. She looks startled and then annoyed, shoulder hiking and head moving in like she might push it away. You can see the moment she realises Eddie is on the other side, her lips part and her eyes widen in wonder. 
She listens for a while, flabbergasted. You think you might be able to hear his voice. Not what he's saying, but his bubbly baby tone. 
"Eddie," she says suddenly. She looks at you, says a bunch of nonsense words and babbling punctuated by Eddie Eddie Eddie. 
"Are you listening to him?" you ask, excited at her recognition. 
She grabs the phone out of your hand and stares at it. You try to wrangle it back and put it back to her ear. She is not happy. 
Hardly news that your toddler's mood may swing, you shove the phone between your head and your shoulder and wrap her up in your arms with a placating shush. She starts to cry regardless. You think they might be crocodile tears. 
"Eddie?" 
"Sweetheart, I gotta go, okay? I'm sorry if I upset June–" 
"You didn't, you didn't, she–" 
"– I'll make it up to you, I swear."
"– misses you, I think–" 
"See you tomorrow, okay?" 
"Okay. Good luck!" you say. The line's already dead. The dial tone makes your ear prickle. 
You feel upset for a second. It's a mess of feelings. You're too tired to deal with any of them. 
"Eddie?" Junie asks, hands pulling at the hem of her nightie. 
"Just mommy," you say with a smile. The longer she looks at you the easier it gets. "You wanna go to bed and cuddle?" 
She laughs and runs away from you.
"I'll take that as a no." 
-
Eddie knocks the door and doesn't get an answer. 
He pauses, a bouquet behind his back and his acoustic guitar heavy around his neck, a grocery bag hanging from the crook of his elbow. It's a very heavy grocery bag. He'd figured he has a lot of apologising to do this afternoon. 
It seems like there's no one home to apologise to. 
"Girls? It's me." 
Still no answer. 
"Eddie," he adds, like a loser.
He thinks he can hear small footsteps. 
"Eddie!" 
He laughs to himself. "Junebug? Where's mommy?" 
"Hello?" you call finally. 
"Hey, can you let me in?" 
He keeps the flowers hidden firmly behind his back as you open the door. He hears the deadbolt, the chain slide free and then the regular old lock unlocking, and you pull the door open and suddenly he can't breathe. You look that pretty. 
"Eddie!" Junie shouts, to his pleasure. 
You grin brilliantly as he steps over the threshold. 
Junie's arms are quickly around his legs. She's in a sweet blue dress and frilly socks looking almost as pretty as her mom does, hair neat and tidy, face pristine. 
You're nearly matching her. You've a soft white shirt on, tucked into a simple blue skirt and a cardigan to match. 
You barely stop to look at him, flitting back to the kitchen where you’ve brown paper bags upended, the fridge and freezer doors both wide open. "Sorry, I'm just putting the groceries away. How did the gig go? Did you rock the house?" You giggle to yourself.
Eddie wants to scream, you’re that endearing. “It went great. Awesome. Not sure I rocked the house, but it was metal.”
"Amazing! I- I'm sorry I didn't hear you, I was in my own head," you say as you go, stepping over toys and frozen peas and Junie's Muppet Babies backpack like a natural. He notices your small white socks and feels himself slipping that little bit further into a terrifying feeling.
He doesn't have time to tell you it's okay, or that he wishes you’d been at the gig, or to watch your step. Junies's babbling for his attention and he'd rather die than not give it to her, moving the grocery bag he has hanging from his hand over her head and tossing it toward the couch, where it lands and spills. 
"Okay, June, I'm gonna pick you up," he says quickly, pulling the guitar over his head. He props it up by the open doorway, Junie tugging at his jeans the whole while. 
"So demanding!" he teases, scooping her up to prop on his hip and unveiling the flowers at the same time. 
You aren't looking. He nudges them towards her face and shakes them gently. 
Junie can't decide what's more fun, the flowers or Eddie. She wraps her arms around his neck as best as she can but stares at the flowers with a dawning comprehension. 
"What are these, baby?" he asks, holding them lower so she can see them all in view. They're mostly red. There's some whites too, big round roses among other flowers he can't name. 
"Red," she says quickly. "White. Yellow, blue, green." 
She's not right, there aren't any yellows or blues, but he can only blame himself for drilling them into her the way he had. She's showing off that she knows them all, and she deserves some praise. 
"Good job! Red, white," he shakes the bouquet enough to reveal a few small pink ones, "pink flowers. They're pretty, don't you think? Pretty as you and mommy?" He hums to himself, patting her back thoughtfully. “Maybe not that pretty." 
You're not listening. If you were he's not sure he could say it, not while you're looking like you do. You're always pretty, always, but right now he feels like he did the first time he saw you. Just gone. 
Junie tells him something, a more factual tone and air about her. He rubs the top of her upper arm encouragingly, asking, "Is that right?" 
"Do you want food?" you call. 
He sets June down on her feet and she hates it until he wraps her hands around the bouquet's neck. "Can you give these to your mom for me? Please?" Junie stares at them. "For mommy," he adds, pointing at you where you're closing the cabinet door. 
Junie, the tiny smarty-pants that she is, runs to you. Eddie's a coward for it, but he doesn't think he can give them to you himself under honest pretenses, doesn't think he could admit that he'd been thinking about getting you flowers for a while now. Much easier to have her give them to you. 
You make a sound like you've swallowed a gasp and stare at them. 
"They're nice, right? I saw them and I thought they'd make a good apology for last night." 
You don't take them. You can't contain a smile, but you don't take them. 
"I'm sorry if I made any trouble for you," he says tentatively. 
You drop your hand on top of Junie's head. Your tone is warm, each word reassuring. "No, you didn't. She just… you know, she has a routine, and she loves when you come around. She missed you. That's not your fault." 
"Okay, good. I missed her too. Nobody can jam out like she can.”
Junie whacks you in the thigh. Eddie's starting to think he did something wrong because you still haven't taken them from her, your eyes as unreadable as the way your hands move, rigid and curling. 
You shake them out and finally take the flowers. 
"Thanks, baby," you say. Then, looking at him. "Thank you." 
"You can get me back," he says. 
Shell shock turns to eagerness. "Yeah, anything." 
He picks up the spilled groceries and brandishes them at you. In one hand is this week's dessert, a huge carton of rocky road ice cream, the fancy kind with big chocolate chips and fluffy marshmallows on top. In the other, a plastic jug of your favourite drink. 
"Find room for these in the fridge?"
Since accepting them, you've yet to put down the flowers, holding them protectively to your chest as you take what he’s offering and carry them into the kitchen.
June runs full pelt at his legs and he doesn't hesitate to pick her up. 
"You're so happy today!" he cheers, saccharine sweet as she burrows her little face into his collar. "Have you been having a good day with mom? I love your matching outfits." 
You try to hide how the compliment affects you, face buried in the freezer. He knows without a shadow of a doubt that your freezer has ample room, you don’t need to look for space. and he can see the way your hand tightens around the bouquet. He loves how shy you've become lately over his compliments, no matter how small. It's worth the possibility of making a fool of himself to see you flustered. 
Junie reports back on the day. Eddie listens intently for words he might understand but finds none. 
He doesn't let this bother him, leaning against the counter behind so he can hold Junie low on his stomach to watch her expressions flicker, hands encapsulating her back. She looks happy, obviously, but she also looks very intent on something. 
"Yeah?" he asks, tilting his head toward her knowingly. "Was the grocery store exciting? Did you do anything else?" 
"Duckies!" she says. 
"Duckies? You saw ducks?" he asks curiously, looking to you for confirmation. 
You're still holding your flowers to your chest. 
Junie chatters. "Duck, duck, duck." 
"What's she talking about?" he asks, pulling her up enough for her head to rub against his chin.
"Oh, we went to the duck pond. She was obsessed," you say. 
"Right, right. Can't say I blame her.” 
"Trying to explain why they weren't yellow took some dedication." 
Eddie smiles at you softly. "You can put them down, you know." 
Your eyes flicker between him and the flowers. "I- nobody's ever got me flowers before. I don't know what I'm s'posed to do with them. I don't… have a vase." 
He hadn't realised he'd be the first guy to get you flowers. It makes him wanna wrap you up and hug you, because how is it fair that a girl like you never got flowers? Not once? 
"Shit," he says instead. 
He flinches hard and looks at Junie. She's too busy with her hands in his hair to notice what he's said. He apologises anyways. 
You roll your eyes. Eddie's relieved to see it's with obvious fondness, a funny lopsided smile to your lips. 
"If she starts dropping s-bombs, you're the one who has to deal with it," you warn. 
"I will.” 
He takes a step toward you and you take a step toward him.
You hum and hold the flowers up to Junie as he had before. "Aren't these just something else? Look how pretty they are! Why don't you pick one, baby?" 
Eddie shifts her onto the right side and you both watch her touch them, hands adorably careful as she feels the leaves between her fingers and pokes the fuzzy yellow centre of a flower with white, round petals. 
"That one?" you murmur, pulling it out from the rest with the same adorable carefulness. 
Junie accepts the flower and immediately shows it to Eddie, ecstatic.
“Yellow," she proclaims. 
"And white," he says, ruffling the petals with his index finger. 
She smells like talc and you, that soft jasmine perfume, and her hair is fragrant where it tickles his face. He indulges and hugs her that little bit tighter. She indulges him in turn and hugs him back, the flower petals cold and silky against his neck. 
"How do you…" You scratch the base of your neck. "Do you think I could squeeze all the stalks into one glass?" 
It's only a bunch from the grocery store but he thinks a glass might be a little too small. "Maybe you can split it? Have one in your room, one in here." 
You set about following his suggestion, snipping away the cellophane with a pair of scissors and acquiring two tall glasses. The stalks are tall. You trim them down and begin arranging them. Eddie has no clue why you're being as particular as you are but he's happy for you to do as you please, traipsing into the living room where Junie seems to have been running rampant before his arrival with intentions of cleaning up.
He closes the front door and bends at the waist to let Junie back on her feet. 
She goes down easy enough. Eddie turns on the TV to keep her occupied while he whips around the room. He wants to clean (as best as he can) before you see him and tell him to stop. He puts your small handbag and Junie's backpack at the sideboard by the door. He sweeps up all of her toys and tucks them under the television as you would, then moves onto the rogue dirtied pajamas on the floor. They're Junie's favourites, the ones with tiny strawberries that she always chooses when given the option. 
Your laundry basket isn't anywhere in the living room or kitchen. He attempts to sneak past you where you're still arranging flowers intently. The sight of you stops him in his tracks. 
I need to get her a vase, he thinks. And another bouquet.
You turn to him, a pleased expression turning your features from pretty to chest-achingly lovely. 
He holds up the pajamas and then keeps on down the hall to the bathroom, even as you chasten, "Eddie," with a fond exasperation. 
You showcase your first bouquet upon his return, sheepish, awaiting judgement. You're conflicted tonight, a handful of emotions shaken and stirred. 
"Tada," you sing. 
"Looks sick, sweetheart. If this whole waitressing thing doesn't work out for you, you could definitely be a florist."
You huff a laugh. "Oh, for sure." 
"I'm serious. It looks really nice." 
He thinks maybe he can see the way you might've been before, in that moment. There's something so young – and you are young, as he is, as he keeps forgetting – about your face and how you take praise. You look like you want desperately to brush it away, and you look like you want him to give you more. 
He stands close enough that you're forced to turn back to the counter where the second bouquet is taking form. "This one looks nice too." 
"I thought I'd put the prettiest one out here." You lean back and your shoulder presses to his chest. "And then the reject in my room," you say, chin lifted to look him dead in the eye. 
He feels heat crawling up his neck and decides to fight fire with fire, even if the fire is entirely imagined. "Do you often have rejects in your bedroom?" he questions with a smarmy smile. 
You laugh. Far from the polite and prim giggling you'd used when you first met, though that was cute, too, this laugh is something else. He wishes he had a tape deck with him to record it, play it back. 
"Only if they're very pretty," you say. You place the last of the flowers into the second bouquet. "And these ones are beautiful. Thank you, Eddie. You didn't have to get me flowers." 
"I wanted to." 
Your head falls gently against the top of his shoulder. He stands very still. 
The faucet drips. The TV plays. If he listens, Eddie can hear the sound of kids outside on their bikes, shouting and jeering. 
Like this, he can see the curve of your neck, the hill of your chin. He can see the pillows of your lips and the slopes of your cheek. The darling shape of your nose. He knows a kiss would fit there well, fit there perfectly, if he would only raise his hand to your shoulder. Turn you ever so slightly.
Even the flat of your forehead begs for affection. He can almost feel it from looking at you – the warmth of your skin under his lips. He can't decide whether he'd kiss you from temple to temple, or smack dab on your crown. Between your brows, at the tail of them. The corner of your eye might work.
Anything would work.
Eddie lifts his hand. Careful not to startle you, he cups the side of your waist like he had before a hundred moons ago when you'd cut his hair in this same kitchen. He spreads his fingers wide and inches over your soft abdomen, feeling for the shape of you. 
You turn your cheek into his shoulder. He lets his lips touch the back of your head. 
Plinking echoes from the living room sudden enough to startle you in tandem. Kids caught with their hands in the cookie jar, you and Eddie both turn to the living room and come away from one another. You're more confused than Eddie at the sound; a split-second and you're out of reach. 
He closes his hand and follows you. Now past the obscurification of the cabinets, he can see that Junie's finally noticed his guitar and has pulled it down flat on the floor. 
She plays with the strings enthusiastically. Eddie can't bring himself to care at her roughness when she looks the way she does, curious and entertained, giggling her contagious baby laugh. 
"I forgot you brought that," you say, looking to him, he suspects, for a cue. A silent, Is she allowed?
Of course she is. “I told you I'd give you a private show."
"What happened to the amp?" 
"My hands were full." Eddie sits on the floor to Junie's left. "Whatcha doing, trouble?" 
She hits the neck. 
He takes her hand in a gentle grip and encourages the side of her finger across the strings. 
She laughs thick and sweet as honey. "Brmm," she imitates, lips pinching between giggles as he helps her do it again. 
"You're a total rockstar," he says. 
You kneel opposite. "She's gonna lose her mind when you play something." 
Eddie feels very smug at what's to come. 
You let Junie play for a time, and then you open your arms and she walks around to your side, sitting on your thighs. She continues to reach for the guitar, seems sulky when Eddie picks it up, and quietens when he plays an experimental note. 
"Are you gonna sing? I've heard you sing before, you know? You're not bad." 
You wrinkle your nose. 
First, he plays the Muppet Babies theme tune for June. She gets excited and starts to hum. You have to hold her in your lap to stop her from messing him up. He wouldn't mind if she did. He's hoping, maybe one day when she's old enough to understand, he could get her behind her own guitar. He's not kidding about starting a band. 
He drops his eyes to his fingers, shaking his head on instinct to try and shake away the thought. 
June sings and sings and eventually, quietly, you start to sing too. You’re purposefully not trying but any flatness is easily made up for by the familiarity of your voice alone. The way you talk, so charming and careful, the sweetness of your newfound shyness and the rough hint of ever-present tiredness you carry, it all seeps into your singing. Eddie adores it.
Junie almost gets some of the words right. It's very exciting for you, Eddie can see it in the tilt of your head. You enunciate precisely and he slows the tempo to give you time. 
"It really sounds like she's almost there. She definitely said 'dreams come true,’” he says as the song ends.
"You think?"
"Definitely. Do you want to sing it again?" he asks, words falling into a high-pitched sugar, eyes on Junie. 
"More?" you add, a slight correction. Junie doesn't know what 'again' means yet, but she understands 'more'. 
"More," she says seriously. 
You go through it one more time. If he plays slow to drag out your reluctant singing, that's his business. 
He unveils his next song with a dash of edgy stage presence. "For my next song, I'll be playing what can only be described as the absolute pinnacle of music." 
He sounds legitimate. 
Your eyebrows pinch together at his sombre attitude. "Sure." 
"I'm gonna play it as true to form as I can, but… I don't have a banjo. So…" 
He plays the first few seconds of Kermit The Frog's The Rainbow Connection. 
When he sings, he does it after an internal pep talk consisting of a scathing, Be brave, idiot. 
"Why are there so many, songs about rainbows. And what's on the other side?" he sings, trying and failing to sound like Kermit. He abandoned that pursuit immediately in favour of his regular voice. Thankfully it's a slow song. Simple. It doesn't take much to play, either. The real challenge are the lyrics, which he doesn't really know. "Rainbows are visions, but only… illusions?"
You bob your head appraisingly, hands crossed over Junies front, cheek pressed to the top of her head. 
"And rainbows have nothing to hide." 
You’re making it impossible to concentrate, looking as earnest, homespun, and ridiculously pretty as you do. Pretty in more than just your looks. The way that you watch him, the way you rub a pattern over Junie's ribs, it’s all so indicative of your heart.
He fucks up the rest. Bad timing, amateurish fingering over the struts, lyrics that escape him. You'd never know he could play Master of Puppets a month after it's debut from the way he performs now. 
You cheer, gathering Junie's hands into yours to help her clap. 
He blushes like a fool. 
Dinner tonight – take out. 
You're prouder than you should be when Eddie asks, "Can I help you cook tonight?" and you get to say, "No, you can't. I'm not cooking." 
You'd never shake your head at a frozen pizza but there's an irreplaceable satisfaction that comes from getting hot food delivered. Maybe it's the convenience, maybe it's that you don't have to cook it yourself. It might even be the grease. Whatever it is, it tastes better than any freezer food ever could.
You've trapped Junie in her high chair. Diaper changed, pajamas on, bib in place. You rolled her sleeves all the way up and gave her two slices of cheese pizza cut into small pieces that have been blown on for a more than generous amount of time and tell her to go ham. She doesn't bother with her plastic fork and you don't blame her, eating your own pizza in a similar fashion. 
Rather than sit opposite you or next to Junie, Eddie has opted for the chair on your left. Junie on your right, your daughter eats with an animated little grin that apples her cheeks, giving her that chubby baby-like smile. 
"You see her smile?" you ask, taking a big bite of perfect crust. You have to stop yourself from sighing happily, fingers covered in crumbs. 
"Yeah?" Eddie asks, pizza sauce or his face like a little kid. 
You sit back in your chair so he can really see her. "She's always been a smiley baby, and when she was much smaller all her smiles were so chubby cheeked. She was chubby cheeked. Now when she smiles like that she makes me remember her when she was a baby." 
"I'm not surprised she was a smiley baby if she had you… D'you miss having a baby?" 
"Watch yourself," you say, and then giggle as all the blood drains from his face. "Kidding. I don't know if I miss having a baby baby. I mean, she's so little, she's practically still a baby. But I do kinda wish I could go back and hold her as a newborn." 
Eddie wipes his cheek and stands up to get some paper towels. He wipes his face and hands and grabs the juice from the fridge to fill his glass (that's basically still full) and then yours (the real reason he'd stood, you reckon). 
"Was she heavy?" he asks.
You worry for a moment he's humouring you. It's clear how much you love Junie, you know it is, and that shows in how much you want to talk about her. You'd never expected that part, though of course it makes sense – sometimes she smiles and you wanna call the newspapers – and you don't think Eddie's insincere. He seems like he genuinely wants to know and that's enough for you to want to round the table and throw your arms over his shoulders. 
"I think…" You pick up your glass and hesitate with the rim to your lip. "I think if you'd held her back then, you wouldn't think she was heavy." 
He practically smolders, bringing an arm up to tense his bicep. "Thank you." 
You laugh at him. "Shut up! I just think, you've been good with her ever since you met her. When I held her for the first time it's a good thing I was laying down. I probably would've dropped her." 
Eddie takes Junie's sippy cup to fill. You'd say it was a waste if he hadn't bought it himself, she's too busy eating her weight in cheese to care about something as rudimentary as juice. 
"You would not have dropped her." 
"I would've." 
"You wouldn't have! And if you did, it would've been an accident. Next point, they don't have skulls, right? No harm, no foul." 
"Who told you babies don't have skulls?" 
"...I'm not at liberty to say." 
You eat the rest of your crust and shake your head at his misguided education. "They have skulls, Eddie. The scalp is super soft and fragile for ages, but they definitely have skulls. You know what they don't have?" 
Eddie squeezes Junie's shoulder as he walks behind her. "What?" he asks in alarm, passing you to sit down again. His knees touch the side of your thigh.
"Kneecaps." 
His hand stops on the way to the pizza box, body frozen. 
"What?" he asks, his alarm doubled.
"Swear down. No knee caps." 
"Don't they need them? For crawling? I feel like knee caps are more important than skulls." 
"If you didn't have a skull you wouldn't be able to breathe," you say, though you're guessing. 
"What use is breathing if you can't move?" 
You turn to him to take him in properly. You beam, because this is an outlandish conversation and you're enjoying every second of it and he looks just as happy as you feel. 
"Do babies need to move? June could never move again and I'd still look after her,” you counter.
"Sweetheart, you're cheating." 
"I can't exactly breathe for her-" 
"What are you talking about? Of course you could. I don't know how but you'd find a way, Y/N, I know what you're like." 
Your teeth click together, a funny retort squashed down by his unexpected admittance of faith. He always does this; Eddie loves to tell you the kindest things anyone has ever told you like they don't cost him a thing. 
"I would," you agree, blinded by love rather than supported by any logic. 
"Mommy," Junie says, like she knows she's the topic of your hypothetical devotion and she wants in. "More pizza"
"Please?" you tack on, though her small sentence had impressed you to the point of elation. You turn to her already with your hand in the pizza box. 
"Pizza," she says. You love the way she says it, like the 'zuh' sound at the end is a complete surprise. 
The pizza's cold enough by now to give it to her intact. She's amazed at the big slice you put on her plate, picking it up with a coordination you know is taking a lot of effort for her. 
"Good job, baby," you praise, using her distraction to pull a little string of cheese off of her messy cheek. 
She takes a huge bite. You watch her worried she's gonna choke, and feel Eddie's knees press deeper into your thigh as he moves forward to join in. 
"Is it weird that she's impressing me right now?" he asks. 
You giggle and roll your shoulders back until you can feel the brush of his hair against your shirt. "No, she's awesome."
For dessert, you insist on plating up. Or bowling up. You scoop a more generous than she should really have portion for Junie, something similar for Eddie, and a normal portion for yourself. 
"On the couch?" Eddie asks. 
You can see him cleaning up Junie out of the corner of your eye. You wish he wouldn't but you're grateful that he does. His attentiveness makes your hands feel heavy in that you remember you have them, and you remember what it's like to want to hold someone else's. 
"Yeah," you say, though eating on the couch makes you nervous. You don't want to ruin it. You're lucky you even have one. 
Eddie scoops Junie up easy and pats her back.
“You put away a lot of cheese, kid. A lot. Was that yummy or what?" 
She burps. His laughter is roaring and boyish as he applauds her. 
"You're patting her back, she's gonna keep burping.”
"That's what you're supposed to do for babies, isn't it?" 
He stands under the harsh kitchen light with his face turned away and down toward Junie, hair a mess of flyaways, t-shirt covered in shiny toddler fingerprints over one shoulder and jeans slipping down low on his hips. Your explanation comes breathlessly. "When you give a baby a bottle they suck in too much air and it gives them trapped wind. You burp that kind of baby. Not greedy almost three year olds." 
"She is not almost three." 
"I think I'd know, Munson." 
"She's like, two and a half at most." 
"I'm rounding up for emphasis," you say, and glare at his eyebrows rising. 
He pats her back some more anyways. She burps again and he laughs even more. "Juniper The Burpiest," he says to himself as he walks away, voice fading as he settles down across the way on the couch. 
Junie has crashed and burned, warm thick cheese and dough putting her quickly into a close to listless state in his lap. He faces her out toward the TV and she leans heavily against his chest with his hands around her torso, propping her up. You shepherd in the desserts. 
"Gimme Junie's," Eddie says. 
"She's gonna fall asleep," you say, but pass it over anyhow. 
Eddie places the bowl of rocky road in her lap with a hand between to stop from making her legs cold and starts to spoon ice cream into her mouth. She accepts. It's adorable to watch. His face over her shoulder, Junie's face slowly deflating, eyes bleary and blinking as her lips close lazily around the spoon. She barely flinches at the cold. 
You eat your own ice cream in the seat next to them and wonder if this is forever. 
Eddie wipes her chin with the side of his hand and watches her head fall. He wears a loving smile. It makes you want to cry, to know someone else loves her. 
You let all your weight fall against his shoulder and eat your ice cream casually. This is the least casual thing you've ever done. Spoon in your mouth, you press your cheek to the top of his arm and glue your gaze to the TV. 
You swear you can feel his eyes on you, but when you chance a look he's watching the TV, head inclined to yours ever so slightly, a hand brushing Junie's hair from her dozing face. You're weak. You give yourself over to what you want and turn your nose to his arm. He smells lIke he always does, warm in the truest definition of the word. 
You close your eyes. After a few minutes, you feel Eddie take the bowl from your hands and set it next to Junie's. You want to open your eyes and say sorry but they’re heavier than you'd thought, and you can only manage a murmur of sound. 
His hand sliders under your elbow and curls around your arm. His head drops on top of yours so softly you almost don't feel it. 
You doze, digging your face further into his arm, feel the curve of it under your cheek and the cut off of his sleeve rising. 
A frayed thread tickles your cheek and you complain without thinking, sighing your annoyance. 
"What?" Eddie asks. 
You raise a hand to rub at your face and eyes. "Tickled me." 
"Did I? M'sorry." 
"T-shirt. Did you cut them yourself?" 
"You know it. Was going through a phase." 
"Going through." 
"Say it to my face," he says. Soft, teasing. 
You lift your head and find him smiling at you. 
He has a beauty mark under his eye, occluded near completely by his eyelashes. You can't believe you've never noticed it before. 
"You have a freckle," you whisper.
"Where?" He nods. "Under my eye?" 
"Yeah." 
You sit up and stare at him. He closes his eyes and tilts his head back. "I've never seen it before," you continue, still whispering. "It blends in with your eyelashes." 
"I think you're the first person to see it who isn't my mom. No one ever looks at me this long,” he says quietly.
If his eyes weren't closed you'd never have had the courage to do what you do next. You raise your hand with his cheek, thumb pressed to the skin beside his nose and fingers slipped under his ear. You turn his face toward the light. Eddie lets you without complaint, his breath warm where it fans over your thumb. You push your fingers further until they've threaded into his soft hair, your thumb brushing up under his eye. You part his mess of dainty lashes with your thumbnail until the beauty mark is clear in view. 
"That's so sweet," you whisper, awed. 
Eddie readjusts Junie in his lap with an overabundance of caution and doesn't speak. He's lax under your touch. 
"It's really pretty. You had it since you were a baby?" 
"I think so." 
You laugh under your breath. 
"What?" he asks. 
"It suits you." Something pretty hiding in plain view. 
"I heard," he says hedgingly, "that freckles are a sign of how you died in a past life." 
"Yeah?" 
"Yeah. Bet it was something really gross, like a parasitic worm-" 
"Ew." 
"Or someone stabbed me. Or shot me. With an arrow." 
"You're only twenty. Your past life would have still been in this century." 
Eddie opens his eyes just to glare at you. "Don't deprive me of a badass past life. How would you have had me die?" 
You push his hair from his face. "You know what I heard about them?" 
"What?" 
Fun to whisper with him like this. Like you’re younger than you are, trading secrets in the dim light. 
"I heard they're kisses from a past life." 
You raise your second hand to his cheek and cradle his face. 
Eddie leans into it. “You wanna give me one for the next?” he asks, a short fall from salacious. 
Your breath doesn’t catch. Your hands don’t shake. “Is that what you want?”
He falters. Bravado slips. Your heart skips a beat, worried maybe he doesn’t like you the way you’re thinking after all. 
“Y/N,” he says.
You can’t hear his rejection. You won’t. 
You close your eyes and kiss his cheek. Your nose slides over his skin, the heat of his blood under the surface warming your palms, and you steal a second there, two, breathing in his smell. If this is all you get, you can be okay with it. Eventually.
You pull away. 
“Thanks, sweetheart,” he says. You can’t tell if he’s joking or not.
𓆩❤︎𓆪
thank you for reading! | my masterlist | this fic is multi-chapter 
if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡
please forgive any mistakes and how long it took, i have been a bit unwell! hopefully it won’t be too long before part four :3
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neteyamsyawntu · 19 days
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Violent Little Thing
Neteyam x Bratty Na'vi!Reader
✨Friendly Disclaimer: The content of this story contains aged-up characters! If this is something that makes you uncomfortable, please feel free to click or scroll away. The last thing I want is for anyone to read something they are uncomfortable with, however if you decide to interact with any negativity, you will be blocked from my blog as a result.
Warnings: 🔞MINORS DNI🔞, vulgar language, angst, smut, size difference, brat behavior, dom Nete, P in V, friends to lovers, belly bulge
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Things hadn’t always been so… intense between you and Neteyam. Once you were nearly inseparable, tied at the hip since childhood. It was an understatement to say that you were with each other at every waking moment, whether it be through sparring, training, hunting, or even weaving together. While most in the clan saw you as wild, Neteyam was your rock. When it became apparent that you weren’t going to grow much more than your current height and the others in your age group began to heckle you for it, Neteyam, aside from sending a few poison laced stares their way, helped you train to push your body so that you wouldn’t fall behind. Yet as the two of you grew older and matured, or rather when Neteyam’s training as the future Olo’eyktan became his main priority, the two of you spent less and less time together, until at last you couldn’t help but think that Teyam was flat out avoiding you.
Any advances you made to bridge the growing gap between the two of you only fell flat, until you were tired of fighting. Fighting for him and the relationship you once had. You accepted that this was just him “growing into his own” and “fulfilling his duties as future Olo’eyktan”, yet still a small piece of you couldn’t help, as you watched him from afar where Neteyam had brought your training group to strengthen your fighting strategies with a tang of longing in your chest. Today’s main focus was on using your natural surroundings to your advantage. The spot that Neteyam had chosen was the most dense of forest that you could get for such practices; with winding tree roots and vines galore to climb, swing, and push off of to make quick escapes or sneak attacks. Today, you realized, would be no different from any of the previous training days. Despite the forced proximity between you and Neteyam, he still refused to look your way for more than a few seconds while explaining instructions. 
Your foot tapped against the ground, tail swatting behind you impatiently as you watched two members of your group twist and weave through the lush flora, avoiding punches and kicks from one another, waiting for your turn. “Don’t worry, Y/N. If you can’t reach one of the vines, I’ll give you a boost.” A low voice sounded from behind you. Tehkani, offered you a smug smirk as you threw him a glare over your shoulder. Great mother this male was insufferable. It wasn’t that Tehkani wasn’t attractive, quite the contrary in fact. His downfall however was that he was one of the cockier men of the bunch to say the least, his ego could be compared to the size of an ikran's wingspan. 
You gave him a dramatic scoff in response as you turned back to face the scene ahead of you, and for a moment, you could have sworn, Neteyam’s ear twitched, angling in your direction from where he stood with his arms crossed a few feet in front of you, watching the two na’vi himself. “I don’t think assisting your opponent is part of the assignment.” You say to Tehkani without meeting his gaze, making sure to have the right amount of bite in your voice. Your spine straightens at the sound of his smooth chuckle from behind you and bristle as you feel his breath against the back of your ear to where he had leaned down to whisper, “Oh I don’t think they’d be able to tell… this area is so dense, I’d bet there’s quite a few things that could go unnoticed.”. As if right on queue, you observe as the muscles in Neteyam’s back tense. 
Interesting…
Making sure to keep the direction of your gaze subtle, you turn your head slightly to the side, “And by ‘a few things’ you mean…?” You ask Tehkani, keeping your own voice low, pushing back the wave of nausea that manifests in your stomach when the male brushes the tip of his nose against the shell of your ear, “I mean… with all of this thick foliage and how tiny you are… I’m sure no one would notice if we were to sneak off and maybe… I don’t know, have a private sparring match of our-.”, “-Tehkani.” The growl in Neteyam’s voice has you snapping your attention to him in an instant. He hasn’t moved from where you last saw him, but his body was now angled in an open stance, partially to keep an eye on the two other na’vi that were still sparring through the obstacle course. “If you aren’t offering any useful observation or training advice, then I suggest you focus on the match ahead of you.” To his credit Tehkani held Neteyam’s stare, despite the full intensity of the future Olo’eyktan powered the glare that Neteyam was throwing his way. 
“Actually Teyam, Y/N and I were talking about having a warm up match before it reached our turn on the course.” Damn was he arrogant, yet the tick in Neteyam’s jaw sent a trickle of satisfaction down your spine, his eyes flicking to your own for only a moment. “That won’t be necessar-.”, “Actually I think it would be a great idea.” Your own words seemed to surprise even you as they left your mouth. Neteyam’s gaze once again shot to you, his eyes assessing as he pondered what in Eywa’s name was going through your head. 
It was common knowledge that you really only tolerated the males in your training group, especially when so many of them saw your height as a weakness, so the idea of you actually accepting Tehkani’s offer? Once Neteyam was done trying to read through the aloof expression on your face, he turned his gaze back to Tehkani with a look that was… different. His upper lip curled slightly to partially reveal his fangs, eyes glowing with a predatory… What was it… possessiveness? You could hardly stop the low hiss that left you as you gave Neteyam your own assessing look, now crossing your arms and swatting your tail in outrage. The utter nerve for him to look at anyone like that because of you— not when he refused to even have a casual conversation with you— refused to spend any time with you outside of training in months.
You braced yourself once you realized what you had done when that heated gaze now pinned you to the spot as Neteyam announced to the rest of the group, “Training is over for the day, you are dismissed. Head back to hometree.”. The rest of the na’vi, although a bit confused, heeded their karyu’s words and began making their way back home. You held his glare, knowing that when Neteyam had excused everyone, that it applied to everyone except you. Fine. If he wanted to play that game, you could play too. Fixing your expression to something a tad more inviting you throw a glance to Tehkani as he was still debating whether leaving you alone with the fuming future leader was in your best interest, “I’ll find you when I get back, okay?” You forced your voice into a collected and velvety sounding calm, wrapping up your little display with a gentle brush of your tail against Tehkani’s leg. The male straightened, his eyes now eating every inch and curve of your body up, before giving a slight nod, remembering he was supposed to be playing the roll of the nonchalant playboy and offering a hushed “Sure.” Before turning making his way to catch up to the others, “No. She won’t.” Neteyam spat after him.
Tehkani paused a moment, throwing glances between you and Neteyam like he was watching a game of tennis, before looking to you for… perhaps reassurance? To which you just gave him a curt nod and click of your tongue. That sent him on his way.
 Neteyam didn’t take his eyes off you as he waited a few minutes for the sounds of his students to disappear into the forest. Arms still crossed over his muscles chest as he spoke, “Care to explain yourself?”. You gawked, scoffing at his arrogance. Surely he couldn’t think you were wrong in this instance. “Last time I checked, you were never entitled to any explanation of my actions.”. Your heart clenched at the words. It hurt to challenge him face on like this, but even still, part of you knew that this had been a long time coming. “I am entitled to one when it’s your actions that are distracting from my lessons. So I’ll ask again. Would you care to explain yourself, Y/N?”. 
The further reeling of your upper lip felt all too natural as you bared your fangs at Neteyam, “You’ve got to be kidding me.”, “Am I?” Neteyam challenged with a voice of startling calm and control, “Yes. Cause this has to be some kind of a joke for you to suddenly be acting like this— like I mean something to you when you very clearly have shown me that isn’t the case.”. Neteyam bristled, taking a step toward you to which you matched in retreating a step, “You really think you don’t mean something to me?” You feel like you couldn’t have rolled your eyes any harder, “Oh save me the bullshit, Nete. You’ve hardly even so much as looked at me when we aren’t at training.”
Neteyam let out an elongated sigh, lifting a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, “So I suppose this is all your tactic to get my attention then? Well congratulations Y/N. You’ve got it. Happy?”. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. It’s like he was treating you as if you were nothing more than a spoiled child. Rage coursed through your veins like venom as you chanced a step toward him, tail raised up high in defiance, “No Neteyam! I haven’t been happy since you shut me out of your life and made me nothing more than an obligation rather than your friend!” There it was. Everything you had kept bottled up, and here you were half ready to throttle him over it. 
Neteyam’s eyes widened, his arms dropped to his sides. He had half a mind to look… startled, as if you had physically struck him. “You truly think I don’t care about you?” His voice was now gentle, almost cautious, his face painted in blatant anguish. “I know you don’t.” The words came out with a regrettable trembling. “Friends don’t just push each other away without giving any sort of reason.”. Neteyam’s ears flattened, his head dropping as he looked at the ground briefly, trying to fight for the right words, but he knew what he’d done. Known all the times you’d approached him that he’d always given excuses that he was busy or straight up walked away. “I know… It’s just. These past few months, with my preparations and shadowing my father I-.”, “I don’t want to hear it, Teyam.”. 
Neteyam flinched at the outburst, cocking his head slightly, “Y/N, you don’t understand how stressful these last couple of months have been. I have been exhausted-.”, “Then you could have told me- asked me for support! But instead you chose to shut me out.” You argued, arms splayed out as if putting yourself open for attack, putting yourself at his mercy and presenting your vulnerability.
“I was trying to figure it out for myself.”, “You abandoned me!”. Pain and regret rippled over Neteyam’s features, his shoulders sagging if only briefly, blinking rapidly as he tried to find the words, tried so desperately to say something that would mend the wound that had been gouged in your relationship. He took a step forward, “I didn’t- Y/N you mean everything to me! You think I wanted you to shoulder my burden for me?”.
“Fuck you!” The words explode from your throat before you can give them a second thought. Neteyam stops dead in his tracks, his chin tilting slightly upward in silent disbelief with a huff of a breath, his jaw tightening as his eyes survey you before him, “Really?”. The lethal tone in which he says the word is like a jab to the gut leaving anxiety to now bubble in your stomach in its wake. Then he inclines his head, eyes narrowing with a heaviness that makes your knees weak, “I suggest you choose your next words very, very carefully, Y/N.”. You suck in a shaky breath as he dares another step toward you, then another, until your back meets the rough bark of the tree behind you. Your ears flatten, nose crinkling slightly in annoyance at your own obliviousness that ended in you being cornered, yet you refuse to give him the satisfaction of thinking he has even an inkling of power over you, so you lift your chin in defiance, forcing yourself to meet the gaze of the future Olo’eyktan standing before you, so close that the height difference between you now blatantly obvious, the top of your head just barely reaching his collarbone, which only proves to make you clench your teeth at the constant “one up” he’s always had on you. 
“Fuck. You.” You hissed the words with strict emphasis, “Fuck you and your self righteous bullshit that you like to parade around the clan. I’m sure it’s real hard for you to hold all of this power over everyone.”
 “Stop it…”
“This sense of privilege you carry just for being the son of Toruk Makto.”
“Y/N…” Neteyam spoke your name with such an edge you never recognized in his voice before, that you would’ve shuddered otherwise, but you didn’t care.
“The mighty warrior, who excels in everything. Future Olo’eyktan and major pain in my ass.”
“Enough!” The growl behind the words finally snapped you back to the present, as if you weren’t in your own body to begin with. You assessed how close the proximity between the two of you had become. The two of you were practically sharing the same breath, Neteyam’s broad chest rising and falling rapidly with heavy, rugged breaths. Yet despite his heavy breathing, nothing in Neteyam’s face showed any signs of the rage that was sure to be fuming under his skin. No, instead his face only bore a mask of pure icy calm. “Get away from me.” Your words were hardly more than a whisper as you held his gaze, fighting not to crumble under it, yet his voice reflected the calm on his face, “No.”.
“Get. Away.” You spat through ground teeth. Again you are met with resistance, “I will not.”. So now it was your turn to resist. Baring your fangs in a snarl you raised your hands, sending a brisk yet firm shove to his chest. Neteyam staggered only slightly before regaining his composure, his amber eyes never leaving yours for even a second, “Again.” Was he using this as a training moment? Your blood rose to a boil in your veins as you raised your hands again, stepping forward to try and utilize the strength in your body to push past him, yet the moment your hand met his chest, Neteyam’s had captured your wrists, now causing you to stagger back as he pinned them above your head. 
Your pulse quickened as you watched him with wide eyes, noses now brushing against one another. He was close. Too close. Close in the sense that it had your blood boiling for more reasons than one. You felt as if the heat in your blood might very well melt you as Neteyam lowered his head to slowly run the tip of his nose down the column of your neck, “Neteyam…”, “You always were such a violent little thing.”. You choked back the whine that threatened to escape your throat as Neteyam’s lips met the space just above your collarbone, “I’m not… I’m not little.” The words came out a bit more breathy than you had anticipated, mentally cursing yourself when you felt Neteyam smirk against your skin. “Aren’t you?” He countered, letting his teeth graze your skin where his lips had been. 
Your breath hitched at that, head falling back in silent defeat, “Fuck off Sully.” You spat, one last attempt to get some sort of control on the situation, yet your resolve was so close to slipping. Neteyam pulled back, a quiet fire roaring in those golden eyes of his as he gripped your jaw in his hand, forcing your gaze to meet his, “You’ve always had such a foul mouth.” He purred, now eyeing said mouth in contemplation, but you would give him no room for contemplation. You would get the upper hand one way or another. With that, you crashed your mouth into his. 
The kiss was rough and sloppy as a mix of lips, tongue and teeth tangled and fought for dominance. Neither of you would back down so easily. Your body cried out as Neteyam pressed his weight into you, hands gripping your hips as his fingers dug into the smooth skin there. You took the opportunity to fist your own hands into his braids, tugging at the roots of his head, only to have a moan ripped from you as Neteyam captured your tongue in his mouth, giving it a firm suck. Your body trembled against his in anticipation, your hips subconsciously grinding against the stiffness beneath Neteyam’s loincloth that now bumped against your stomach. 
Wrenching your mouth from his, your half lidded eyes slid over Neteyam’s face, giving a slow and precise rock of your body against his bulge, “Already hard after a single kiss? I’m shocked Nete, I thought you were going to make me fight for it.” You breathed against his lips as he dove back in for more, briefly parting only to respond, “Eywa, you’re such a…” he broke into a growl, pressing his lips to yours again before continuing, “I wouldn’t be acting so high and mighty if I were you.”. You craned your neck as Neteyam descended from your lips to leave a trail of kisses down your jugular, “Oh? And why not?” You breathed, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, while the other hand stayed firmly lodged in his hair. “Because…” Neteyam let out a breathy groan before dragging his tongue from the base of your neck, all the way to your jaw, then to your ear, “I can smell how badly you want me.” A lick up the shell of your ear, “How wet you are for me.” And then his lips closed around your earlobe, making your body squirm against his, whimpering out pathetically as Neteyam guided your hips to move against him rhythmically.
“Mmn great mother…” you whined following his movements to relieve some form of tension that was building between your legs. “Tell me what you want, yawne…” ‘yawne’, your heart hammered at that, yet you could only respond with another whimper. “Use your words.” You groaned in frustration pushing off of him enough to spread your legs somewhat, letting him stand between them, “Touch me… please Nete..”, “Oh, the brat has manners… I thought I was going to have to make you beg.”. Your skin felt hot against his calloused fingers as he let one hand drift from your hip to the band of your loincloth, skimming it teasingly, “Fuck you.” You groaned, bucking your hips in attempts to entice him further, get him right where you wanted him. “Such a dirty little mouth…” Neteyam growled, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth, “Don’t worry, yawne. I intend to.” And with that, his hand plunged past the band of your loincloth, his fingers grazing along your pussy lips that were indeed drenched in your arousal. 
Neteyam swore as he gathered your wetness on his fingers, spreading and massaging it over your clit. Your body trembled, toes curling as you bit into his shoulder, trying your hardest not to let yourself be completely vulnerable. The game was still on and if he wanted you to break for him, he’d have to earn it. Almost as reading your thoughts, Neteyam slipped a finger passed your entrance groaning into your ear at the tightness of it, “You’re so wet, yawne… all for me?” Neteyam mused. Smug ass. “How do you know part of that wasn’t for Tehkani? -Ngahh!” As if answer, Neteyam forced a second finger into you, thrusting deep enough to make his point, ripping a cry of pleasure form your throat, “Don’t you dare say his name while I’m fucking you with my fingers.” Neteyam hissed, nipping at your jawline, “By the time we are finished, I’ll make sure my name is the only one you remember”.
Your back arched, perching yourself on your tip toes as Neteyam’s fingers found the spot that made you into a moaning mess as they began flicking and curling against it. Your hips sputtered against his hand, nails biting into the skin of his back. Your eyes filled with pleasured tears as the knot in your core threatened to snap, pulling tighter and tighter, the song of your pitching voice having Neteyam brace his other hand on the tree beside you, “Go ahead, yawne… say it.”. “Mmn!” You whined helplessly, burning your face in the spot between his neck and shoulder. “Say my name, ma’ yawntu..” Neteyam’s rasped voice purred against your hairline, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Haah… T-Teyam!!” With another flick of his fingers a bolt of lightning shot through your body, having you shuddering against him, as the tears that had brimmed in your eyes now flowed hot down your cheeks. 
Giving you a moment to collect yourself, Neteyam peppered tender kisses along your face before gently removing his hand from your loincloth to fully take in his drenched hand. His soft chuckle brought you out of your dazed euphoria as you looked between his hand and your sodded loincloth, “I don’t think you’ll be able to wear that back to the clan.” Neteyam mused with a cheeky smirk, catching your half hearted glare just as he brought his hand to his lips and began licking it clean. The sight had the ache between your thighs manifesting all over again, biting your lip as you beheld the show before you, all while untying the straps of your loincloth and allowing it to drop to the forest floor between you.
Neteyam’s eyes darkened, half lidded with lust, kicking away the garment as he mirrored your action, making quick work of his own loincloth before tossing it alongside yours. You tried not to look. Tried and failed as the utter girth of him had your thighs clenching together. “I meant it, when I said you were everything to me.” Neteyam hummed, lifting your chin with a finger, forcing you to meet his gaze as his other hand gave his cock a few firm pumps, “Now let me show you exactly how much you mean to me.”. You were nearly beyond words as you spared another glance between his legs, licking your lips as you looked deep into his eyes, “Good… fuck me like you mean it, Nete…”.
Neteyam’s eyes flared at your words, a deep rumbling brewing in his chest as he leaned down, elbows hooking under your knees and hoisting you up and spreading you wide for him, pinning your body against himself and the tree. Your arms were around his neck in an instant, eyes glued to his own before your mouths finally reclaimed each other. This time the pace was sweeter, gentler, knee buckling, if it weren’t for the fact that your knees were now pushed up to your breasts. Then, oh so gently, Neteyam lowered you until his tip prodded at your entrance, his teasing swipes not lasting long once you whined in protest, desperately trying to move your hips to drop onto him. Once he had made the descent, lowering you onto his cock, your whole body melted into his, letting the feeling of him stretching you out consume every conscious thought in your mind. 
“Mmph…Great mother… you’re so tight, yawne- fuuuck.” Neteyam cursed into the crook of your neck, slowly stirring his cock inside you before lowering you down more and more, inch by delicious inch, until he was fully nestled inside of you. A prominent pressure prodded at your lower abdomen, your face a mix of pleasure and slight discomfort as you adjusted to the feeling, “S.. so deep…” you mewled, clinging to him like a babe, your body trembling oh so slightly.
Never had you felt so incredibly full, so completely. Your mind whirled as you willingly gave into him at last, nuzzling your cheek against his own. The action had your scent forcing its way into Neteyam’s nostrils, consuming his thoughts as he groaned in response, returning the favor with a brush of his own cheek and a gentle stirring of his hips. “Oh Eywa…” you whimpered, matching his rhythm to ride along with the slow movements of his hips. “Ahh that’s it yawne… shit… I won’t be able to hold back if you keep moving like that.”. An invitation and yet another challenge, whether he realized he had given it or not. Your hips moved with further motivation, speeding your pace enough that had Neteyam’s eyes rolling back, groaning against your neck. 
When Neteyam opened his eyes again, you gasped to find his pupils were nearly fully dilated, repositioning you by placing both of your calves in his shoulders, his hands now grasping your hips in what could be considered bruising if it didn’t feel so good, so right. Then before you could even begin to beg him to move, Neteyam lifted your hips, sliding you off of his cock until only his tip remained, then slammed you back down with a quickness that had you gasping for air. Again and again, over and over, Neteyam repeated this, fucking into you like his life depended on it, your body bouncing and bucking along with his every thrust. The pressure in your stomach, you realized, was definitely the feeling of his tip brushing the inside of your stomach, owning and claiming every inch of you, inside and out. 
Neteyam’s name became a prayer on your lips, your moans and cries as well as the sound of squelching and slapping skin echoed off the towering trees around you. “Mmmn… you are mine, yawne…” Neteyam groaned against your lips, eating up your moans with primal delight.
“All…”
Thrust 
“Fucking…”
Thrust 
“Mine…”
Thrust
With that final thrust you were sent into your second climax, clenching around his length as you rode out your high. Neteyam swore gripping your hips harder, biting into your shoulder as his cock twitched inside of you before spilling into you, fucking each and every drop straight into your womb. 
The two of you stood in silence for a moment, still catching your breaths, bodies sticky with sweat as you came down from your highs. Neteyam hummed in satisfaction, his tongue slipping out to lick at the bite mark that was now throbbing on your shoulder. “Sorry…” Neteyam breathed, gently nuzzling the spot with his nose as if it would take the ache away, yet you were more focused on the strain in your legs from holding this position. Even still you couldn’t help the small laugh that fell from your lips, “It’s ok, we’re even now.”. Neteyam cocked his head as he pulled away to look at you, the space between his brows pinched in confusion, “I said some… terrible things to you today, I think I deserved getting bit into.”. Neteyam then returned the laugh with a chuckle of his own, shaking his head, “No… you spoke your mind today. You’re right. I was a terrible friend and I neglected you.”.
Another silence fell as Neteyam brushed his cheek along the spot in your shoulder, then your neck, then your own cheek, blissfully basking in each other's scents, “You could’ve come to me you know… talked to me about it.”, “I know…” Neteyam whispered, “I know that now… and I promise I won’t shut you out again..”. Neteyam sighed pressing a kiss to your temple, holding his lips there for a short while before finally saying, “I never… want you to feel like I abandoned you. Never again.”. You held back tears as you rested your forehead against his, “We’ll do better. Both of us. Hopefully as a bit more than friends now.” You half joked, yet the seriousness you were met with when Neteyam pulled back to look into your eyes startled you, “I meant it when I said you are mine, Y/N. Mine and only mine… that’s why…” Neteyam held you close, continuing to brush his skin against yours over and over again in a manner that had you giggling softly, “When we walk back to hometree I want my scent to be on every inch of your body.”.
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feeder86 · 8 months
Text
Taste
Mike could remember how his breath caught in his throat when he saw Bruno for the first time. Having always been so slim and athletic himself, it was as if all of the blood in his entire body rushed down into his groin and he felt lightheaded; his heart racing with lust for the man in front of him. Bruno was the epitome of Mike’s dream man: taller than everyone else in the bar, large and very, very fat. He was flaunting his chubby physique with pants that were clearly too small; his butt crack on show, as well as the lower half of his gut that pushed out over his belt. There was a buzz around him at the bar. It was rare that a man so large came in here and it was obvious, from the twitching hands of the bear-loving guys around them, that there were many who wanted to touch his remarkably overfed body.
Mike stood behind him at the bar, waiting to be served, feeling like he was invisible in the wide man’s shadow. Even the scent of him, slightly sweaty in the humid environment, was turning Mike on; his large love handles shimmering gently as the bodies crowded around. Finally, with a space opening up at the crowded bar, Mike squeezed himself next to the big man, waiting to be served as well. He looked to his side and smiled shyly, without speaking. Even then, the eye contact, however brief, made Mike’s hardness flex in a way that made him hope he wouldn’t be served too quickly in order to allow the bulge in his crotch to calm down.
“Mine’s a beer,” the big man stated confidently to Mike.
“Sorry?” Mike spluttered back, surprised that he had been spoken to.
“My drink. I’ll have a beer,” he repeated expectantly.
“Oh… I wasn’t…” Mike mumbled, full of embarrassment. “I guess I…”
“Geez, relax, would you! I’m just joking,” Bruno chuckled, raising hand and finally ordering his own beer. “And what would you like?” he offered Mike, as if by way of an apology for causing Mike to get in such a fluster.
Mike accepted the offer and found himself following the heavy man out of the bar queue moments later. It seemed as if the big guy had come here alone, leaning against a small, high table where he could view the entirity of the bar. “Are you a chaser?” he asked Mike in his usual plain manner.
Wishing that he could act cooler, Mike mumbled once again, unsure how best to answer. “I’m not sure,” he lied. “I guess I could be.”
“You’re cute,” Bruno smiled, after formally introducing himself. “Do you want to touch my belly? Most guys in here seem to want to.”
With a free pass to feat his eyes upon Bruno’s large gut, Mike wasted no time in admiring it’s size and shape. He checked with the big man one last time, then let his electrically charged fingertips spread over the fleshy skin. Pure heaven.
“You’re pretty good at that,” Bruno nodded in approval. “Gentle. Sensual. I bet you’re good at giving a massage.”
“I’d be happy to work on your whole body if you like,” Mike shot back, unsure where his sudden boldness had come from, and immediately feeling a little embarrassed by it.
“Maybe,” Bruno chuckled. “If you play your cards right tonight,” he added, leaning into the table and seemingly about to take some time to really invest in finding out a lot more about his new admirer.
It was strange to think back on how shy Mike had been that night. Although Bruno still never failed to make him feel flustered and aroused, he liked to think, nine months later, that he at least managed to keep a cooler head around him. Being in a relationship with someone that he found so attractive should not have been as much of a challenge as it had seemed to be. His parents and friends had taken one look at Bruno and allowed their sizeist prejudices to rise to the surface. Mike had heard no end of slanderous things about Bruno that had been said to him: that he was lazy and greedy, selfish and unambitious. It was all based entirely upon his weight, and Mike knew it. They seemed to hate how much Bruno felt comfortable in his own skin. It was as if they were offended by it; believing that Bruno should feel ashamed and insecure, just like every other 400lb man of his stature. How dare he simply not care about being so fat?
There were sighs whenever Bruno went to grab Mike’s hand and show him affection in front of others. Perhaps it was the way that Bruno dressed that most irritated people and made them feel embarrassed in his company. He enjoyed his clothes being overly fitted and figure-hugging. For him, a t-shirt shirt should be over-long and tucked into his tight shorts, displaying the full arch of his gigantic gut, or else it should be too short, allowing the fat of his underbelly to show through and catch the breeze as he walked about. However, it was also his grotesque appetite that Mike knew his dad in particular found especially repulsive. He wasn’t wrong in saying that Bruno was always eating something or searching in the cupboards for snacks. He found it cheeky and rude how Bruno would help himself in their kitchen, and when he once upturned the milk bottle to chug it straght from the refrigerator, Mike’s dad had raised his voice in a way that Mike hadn’t heard since he was small.
Mike’s friends and family didn’t understand though. They didn’t realise how far Bruno had come to be in the sort of shape he was in now; how he’d always wanted to be a big man. Back when he’d started college, Bruno had been incredibly slim, and even lanky, given his great height. He’d documented his body well by taking lots of pictures during those early days and continued to do so as he began pushing his appetite to the extreme. His body had responded in just the way Bruno had wanted, as a doughy belly began to form on his slim frame. 
Mike felt an arousal he’d never experienced before as Bruno guided him through all of the pictures of him over the years: the time when he’d started to get love handles, the first signs of his double chin beginning to show. Even from quite early on, his butt had started taking on a fair amount of fat. Bruno had said this had been down to the way he’d tried to limit his exercise so much and make those calories as effective as possible when fattening his body. It had taken time; especially at Bruno’s height. Even when he’d left college, his fat stomach had still been faily easy to conceal under baggy clothes. It was only once he’d started working and had his own place that Bruno’s overeating and weight gain really started to turn to very obvious obesity. Bruno recalled with glee the time when his weight started impacting his everyday life: when he’d become too heavy for store-bought clothes, the stairs becoming more intense to walk up. He’d embraced each one of these changes, accepting the fact that his lovers would now purely be confined to those who enjoyed his fatter body. He’d taken on several feeders, of all shapes and sizes, but he’d never committed to any of these other guys in the way that he had to Mike. 
Sometimes Mike would pick up the guy’s empty clothes off the floor and just admire the sheer size of them, hardly comprehending how lucky he was to have such an oversized and greedy boyfriend. Twenty to thirty pounds a year, that was Bruno’s steady gain rate, realised by maximising his opportunities to overeat and consume as often as possible. As Bruno himself had said, fattening his skinny college body had been a lot simpler than pushing the fat on now he was well over four hundred.
Mike often wondered what it was that Bruno saw in him. Whenever they were out at some sort of bear event, it was obvious how much attention the big man could command. Mike had become accustomed to the grumpy stares of jealousy as he held his enormous boyfriend’s hand. Bruno claimed to like how constantly aroused Mike was for him. He could submit and take a pounding, yet also take the reins and feed Bruno far beyond his daily calorie goals. Not that such a mission was often required. Bruno was, if nothing else, highly motivated to overeat, and always so very self-sufficient. Despite the many hours Mike had spent feeding Bruno in the past, he knew that the big man would most likely be just as big, even if he was still single. Everything to him was so erotic, from the new stretch marks and shape, to the retirement of old clothes and the reactions of those who had not seen Bruno in some time. Every last little chance encounter was a reason for the guy to get aroused, and that horniness was more than infectious.
With Bruno’s birthday approaching, Mike began to feel a little anxious about what to do for it. Last year, they had only been dating a couple of months, and so he hadn’t gone too overboard. However, four months ago, for his own birthday, Bruno had arranged an entire weekend away to visit Mike’s hometown; the one that his family had left when he was just eleven. It was incredibly sweet and thoughtful, not to mention remarkably satisfying to show off the town he knew so well to the man that he had fallen so helplessly in love with.
Mike thought about buying an enormous cake, or an entire banquet of food to surprise Bruno with on the big day. However, when considering  how much Bruno ate in a normal day anyway, he didn’t really feel that he could make it all that special. Bruno’s hobbies weren’t any help either. There weren’t any special video games coming out anytime soon and the hot summer sun was zapping the large chub’s energy levels daily.
“What would you like to do for your birthday?” Mike finally asked, having exhausted his entire creative reserves. However, Bruno dutifully denied needing any sort of fuss, claiming that birthdays were nothing special for him.
Mike persisted. With only a couple of days remaining, he was feeling desperate for an idea to delight his lover for his birthday. “I guess maybe there is one thing I might like,” Bruno began cautiously, as if he had been thinking of the idea for some time.
Breathing a sigh of relief. Mike nodded enthusiastically, wanting to hear Bruno’s thoughts.
“Well, maybe we could try a little role reversal that night?” he asked tentatively.
Mike furrowed his eyebrows. “Role reversal?” he asked. He already thought they did that, having quite an active, versatile sex life.
“I mean… maybe I could feed you for a change? Just for one night,” Bruno added hastily, trying to express the idea in baby steps. “I used to be quite good at it, back in the days when I played around with lots of different feeders and gainers. They all said I was good at it.”
Mike mumbled awkwardly. Despite the length of time he’d been with Bruno, he’d never anticipated the man making a request like this. “I thought you loved my body how it is?” he asked, knowing how hard Mike worked at the gym classes he attended.
“Oh, I do!” Bruno nodded emphatically. “I love all body types. It’s just a one-night kinky idea I had.” He shrugged, then laughed at how ridiculous this scenario was. “It’s not about changing you, and if it’s not your thing, it’s fine. I’ll think of something else.”
Mike considered for a moment. “No, wait…” he mumbled; his brain trying to catch up. “It’s fine,” he shrugged. “It’s for your birthday,” he nodded, feeling that a little sacrifice like this would help show Bruno how important he was to him. “Let’s… let’s do this.”
The bus-worker strikes had completely messed up Mike’s day as he arrived home late on Bruno’s birthday a couple of days later. It was nearly half seven already and he’d been out of the house for almost thirteen hours. He apologised profusely, but Bruno already knew how much chaos the strikes were causing on the city, having seen it on the news. He could see the tiredness in Mike’s eyes and offered to forego his birthday treat in order to let Mike head to bed. However, Mike was having none of it. He tried to rally himself, heading for a shower and coming back in, feeling more refreshed. They ate a normal meal and chatted about much of the same things as they usually did.
“Come sit down,” Bruno smiled, patting his extra large, personal chair in front of the TV; a wicked, horny grin plastered across his face.
Mike did as he was told. He never sat in Bruno’s chair and it felt strange to him now; so roomy and worn-in. He stood briefly once again as a hugely fat Bruno kneeled on the floor in front of him and pulled down his pants so that he could play with him more effectively. Right away, the fat man’s expert tongue set to work, making Mke take huge long sighs of pleasure. He put his hand on Bruno’s head for a moment to stop him. “Honey, it’s your birthday. I should be doing this to you,” he worried.
Bruno shushed him and set back to work, making Mike’s legs twitch as he came close to cimaxing at least a couple of times. Then, just like that, Mike suddenly felt a long, chocolate cream cake getting pushed between his parted lips. He chuckled, having been caught off guard completely. He’d almost forgotten about this part of their horny evening. Where had his kinky boyfriend even hidden those cakes? Still, he chewed and swallowed, having accepted this would be exactly the sort of thing he would be getting up to that night.
Bruno’s demeanor was entirely different. His hands caressed and stroked Mike’s body like he was a precious, god-like being; his large, chubby hands stroking his flat stomach and fondling Mike to keep his hardness as he pushed in another cream cake, then another. Yet, still Bruno was edging him, making him think his time had arrived, then pulling it away.
Mike had never felt such a rush of different emotions. At one point, he would feel dominant and pampered, being hand fed and pleasured by his lover. But then, the next, Bruno would stop everything and chuckle at all the food smeared around his face, declaring him to be a ‘greedy boy’, before resuming as before. 
Mike’s stomach was getting tight and yet he still hadn’t climaxed. The shape of it was distended as Bruno rubbed his giant hand over it with a wicked smirk plastered across his face. Mike stared at his boyfriend’s chubby hands as they gathered the fattening foods and felt as those wide, sausage-like fingers he had long admired, now stuffing it all into his open mouth.
“You’re such a good little piggy!” Bruno teased him as it was clear just how full and aroused Mike was at that moment; those expert hands now whipping his erection up into a dangerous frenzy that could tip him over the edge. Mike stared down at his body, having never seen himself so bloated, nor felt his stomach quite so full. Then, that was it, the moment that Bruno chose to let him climax, just as his eyes settled on the little swollen midsection that was now his stomach. The feeling was intense; more so than Mike had ever encountered before and he let out an embarrassing multi-toned moan that only highlighted just how caught out he had been by the whole experience. He felt utterly spent and withered like a dead flower, being taken to bed by his enormous lover.
The next morning was much the same as any other. Bruno thanked Mike for indulging his kink to let him feed him, and chuckled as he apologised for how bloated and full Mike felt, right up until dinner time that day. But Bruno hadn’t stopped lamenting about how much he had enjoyed it and how well Mike had eaten. He recreated the moan Mike made when he climaxed as if it was the sexiest sound he had ever heard, eating more than usual, as Bruno tended to do when he was aroused.
Perhaps it was the way that Bruno recounted that night over and over that made sure the experience never left Mike’s mind, but now, even the thought of it was making Mike feel horny. His memory was crystal clear as the image of his bloated stomach came back to him each and every time he ate.
“I see you guys are still very happy,” commented Danny, one of Bruno’s gainer friends that Mike had been introduced to when they first started going out.
“He’s wonderful!” Bruno gushed, rolling his big arm over Mike’s shoulders. “I’ve never been this happy with anyone before.”
Mike blushed and smiled, always enjoying how open Bruno was about his affection for him. “Thanks,” he mumbled shyly.
“Mike also had his first, er…” Bruno began cheekily, looking across to Mike as if to gauge whether he should share these sorts of intimate details. “He had his first feed the other week,” he finally finished.
“Seriously?” Danny laughed aloud, his jaw dropping in surprise. One look at Mike’s athletic form and no one would ever have suspected that he would be open to try feeding.
“No… it wasn’t like that,” Mike tried to explain, feeling that Danny was suddenly seeing him in a whole new light. “It was just a little birthday treat for Bruno. That’s all. I didn’t want to do it.” 
“He fucking loved it!” Bruno went on; full of excitement to explain; like this had been bottled up inside him ever since it had happened. “He ate like a pig and then squirted absolutely everywhere afterwards. Shall I do the noise you made when you came?” he asked Mike with a cheeky smirk. 
“No!” Mike shot back with blood rushing to his face.
“Well, well, well!” Danny smiled to himself. “I never would have picked you for a gainer!”
“I’m not!” Mike tried defensively. “It was just a one time thing!”
“Sure,” Danny teased him. “That’s what they all say!” He winked and laughed, letting Mike know that he was only joking with him. Then the conversation changed, leaving Mike feeling surprisingly disorientated as they went back to discussing more mundane affairs. His heart was racing. Was he annoyed at Bruno for sharing their intimate secret like that? Or was it something else?
A few more weeks passed by. Bruno had made some significant progress with his weight, to the point where his tummy was starting to fall out of the t-shirts he had worn when he and Mike had first gotten together; arousing them both beyond belief. Bruno had wanted to celebrate, getting high on some weed and stuffing himself full, just as he had done in his early days, back in college. 
“I fucking love you,” Bruno growled, barely able to focus properly. He slapped his big gut and grinned. “I’m getting so fucking huge with your help, and I love it!”
“Well, I’m very pleased to be of some assistance,” Mike chuckled back, in much the same way any sober guy would, speaking to someone so high.
“And you know what else I love?” Bruno asked mischivously.
“Oh yeah? What’s that?” Mike smiled back, indulging Bruno with his attention, despite the fact that he knew the big man would never remember any of this in the morning.
“I love how chubby you’re getting too!” Bruno whispered as if not wanting to be overheard by a thousand invisible people that surrounded them.
“I’m not getting chubby,” Mike laughed, rolling his eyes at how far gone Bruno was by now.
But Bruno simply threw his head back and smiled with complete joy and happiness. “Oh, I love that!” he moaned with pleasure. “I love how you don’t even realise it! It’s so fucking… insanely hot! You’ve got a little chubby paunch and you haven’t even noticed! It makes me so fucking horny. If you only knew how much fucking butter… and cream… and oils I throw into your food when I cook! Oh, you’d be so fucking mad if you knew!” he giggled to himself; still with that blissful smile as he drifted off to sleep.
Mike stood up, resisting the urge to touch his body and feel. His heart was beating with a peculiar speed, considering how little attention he usually paid to the ramblings of Bruno when he was high. Calmly and without speed, he took himself to the bathroom and shut the door. He saw his face in the mirror, much like every other time he was in here. Pragmatically, he lifted his shirt from his body and dropped it onto the floor. He realised quite quickly that he hadn’t scrutinised his body in quite some time, especially given how quickly the mirror steamed up in this tiny bathroom whenever the shower was running. And yet, the shape of him was all wrong. Since when had his stomach looked so swollen? As he brushed with his finger against his belly button, he noticed a strange, alien fluttering beneath the skin. Unlike the sleeping Bruno in the next room, he hadn’t just gorged himself to create such a bloat. No, underneath his skin was an entirely new, and surprisingly thick, layer of fresh blubber. He grabbed it and pinched at it, surprised at how much he could hold between his fingers and thumb. He turned to his side and noted with horror how very much the shape of it curved out enough to look like a paunch, just as Bruno had said. 
Throwing down his sweatpants and underwear, Mike turned and inspected his rear, only to discover peculiarly plump glutes where his tight butt had once been. His fingers delicately traced the marks on his skin around his waist where his underwear had been quietly digging into him and he bounced on his toes, seeing a ripple of fat flutter through developing love handles. 
Just what had happened to him, he thought with horror, pressing his fingers into his face and realising that there was indeed a little padding of fat growing under his chin. His body was so altered and he hadn’t even realised it! His focus had been so squarely on Bruno, it had left him blind to all else. 
Yet, there it was, as he prodded and poked, grabbed and jigled: the very thing that had led him here, into a kinky relatioship with an ever fattening 440lb man; his raging hard-on, pumped full of blood and throbbing with lust at the sight of his own reflection. Mike’s hand reached for it, as if from pure instinct. Then, with very little time needed, he stroked it up and down, up and down, until it ejaculated with a violent force all across the mirror.
The next morning, Mike awoke to the smell of frying bacon. Bruno was always up early after a session like the one last night, and he generally consumed more than usual the following day. The big man re-entered their bedroom with a grin, passing a large plate of greasy goodness to Mike; it’s hefty portion cleverly camouflaged by the more extreme size of Bruno’s own plateful. 
Instinctively, Mike accepted it, only remembering Bruno’s confession from hours earlier as he was halfway through. Just as he had anticipated, Bruno didn’t remember much from the night before. Once he’d finished the box of doughnuts, he claimed that his mind was a blur, and Mike knew there was no point in bringing up what had been said. However, he did notice, for the first time, how much Bruno was casually glancing over to check on his lover’s progress with the food, inexplicably eliciting a surge of blood into his groin. Throughout the day, Mike also noticed how much Bruno’s eating and snacking habits were rubbing off on him. Whenever Bruno headed to get something for himself from the kitchen, he would always return to the couch with something small and seemingly insignificant for Mike as well. How long had Bruno been doing that without him even registering how these incidental, accidental calories must have been bloating his usual diet?
There were other revelations as well. When Mike went for dinner at his parents’ place one evening, he noticed straight away how small their dinner plates seemed in comparison to what he was now so used to, living with Bruno. He ate it all up, yet his stomach still churned with hunger, even as he left to head home. Then there was the night that he went out for food with his friend, Martha. He’d worn something loose and relaxed, given how much he was starting to notice his paunch in all his other clothes, yet Martha still picked up on a differene to his eating, laughing at how quickly he ate and how full he filled his mouth. Mike blushed. The way Martha described the way he was eating seemed to be exactly how Bruno gorged himself. It had been one of the traits that had turned Mike on the most about his huge boyfriend: the way he ate so ravenously, taking enormous mouthfuls that filled his cheeks and then swallowing it all down and starting again. But had it become a habit that Mike had subconsciously picked up himself as well? Was he now eating in a way that was reminiscent of his 450lb boyfriend?
There was an easy solution to all of this confusion that Mike felt. All he had to do was ask Bruno what was going on. Was he noticeably fatter than he used to be? Was Bruno overfeeding him, as he had claimed that night when he was high? However, Mike had never been particularly great at facing issues head-on. In fact, he found the silence and the ‘not talking about it’ to be strangely comforting. He could forget it was happening and attempt to convince himself that it was all just a kinky little fantasy that was playing out in his own head. That was, until the obvious strain of his pants, underwear and t-shirts started to become too much. Mike remembered how flustered he had been when someone in work had called him out on his weight gains, prodding an outstretched finger into his middle and laughing. He remembered the plethora of emotions within him: embarrassment, shame, disappointment. However, it also supercharged his libido to an insane extent, giving him a boner that he had hardly been able to shift for a whole week.
Upgrading his work pants became the logical strategy, not wanting to generate too much attention to his new shape, nor rip them open if he were to bend over. Likewise, his shirts could look unprofessional if they were to strain any more than they currently were. Mike looked in the mirror and nodded in approval. Yes, these would work well. His new body shape was nicely concealed with ease if you could ignore the slight puffiness to his face. It was certainly something he could learn to live with without too much worry. But that was before the fat started to build up more in his chest. He’d noticed a slight bounce under his shirts for a few days, but it was only when he stood in the mirror that he realised how pointed and full his nipples now appeared. They began to show through, even when he wore his most flattering of shirts and t-shirts. Then Mike could see Bruno staring at them hungrily, knowing exactly what he was doing, and loving every second of it.
It was only a few weeks later, when the concert tickets arrived that Bruno had booked for Mike as a Valenetine’s Day treat, that the enormous Bruno made his next big move. Mike had been gushing about what an amazing gift his thoughtful boyfriend had surprised him with, and kicking himself instead for having forgotten Valentine’s Day altogether.
“You really didn’t get me anything, huh?” Bruno asked with a bemused smile.
“I’m so sorry. I just don’t know where this month has gone. It feels like yesterday we were taking down the holiday decorations,” Mike tried as an excuse.
“That’s okay,” Bruno smiled, grabbing Mike’s butt and rubbing it suggestively, as he tended to do quite often these days, having become seemingly very obsessed with the shape and feel of Mike’s glutes. “I’m sure you can think of a way to make it up to me.”
“I’m positive I could,” Mike smiled back suggestively, turned on by his lover’s chubby hands touching his softer body; his shirt being lifted off.
Bruno headed straight to his target; his tongue sliding over Mike’s nipple with an expertise unkown to Mike beforehand. 
As Mike moaned, Bruno’s hand massaged it’s way into Mike’s groin until the increasingly thicker legs parted to grant him better access. “It’s time you had another feeding,” the enormous, horny man whispered as he lifted his head to kiss Mike.
“Another one?” Mike asked, as if it hadn’t been months since his last one.
“Another one,” Bruno nodded, leading his porky lover to the big chair by the TV and sitting him down. “Right now!” he stated with a smirk.
Deciding not to argue, Mike waited patiently as Bruno disappeared and then returned with mountains of supplies. Where had he hidden all those things? 
Mike sighed and let his head flop back into the chair. Bruno had clearly orchestrated the whole thing, knowing that Mike would forget all about Valentine’s Day, given how busy he had been in work. “All right… Just this once,” he chuckled, surrendering. After all, he really should have remembered their Valentine’s Day. No excuses
This new feeding was kinky from the offset. Bruno’s hands rubbed and pinched at Mike’s extra pounds more than usual, and he pushed in the food with a lot less compromise than he had last time. “What a greedy little pig…” the man whispered between sucking Mike off and pausing at just the right moments to prolong the experience.
There was a swirl and great gushing of chemicals and pleasure in Mike’s brain throughout the entire process. He thought he would climax, then not. He thought Bruno’s teasing couldn’t get any better, and then it did. He’d almost forgotten how arousing his feeding had been last time, and then it all came rushing back with ten times the original intensity. 
“Are you going to keep getting fatter for me, Mike?” Bruno asked, expertly stroking his lover’s hardness as if he really might let him climax this time.
Mike moaned. The answer was obvious. “Yes,” he nodded submissively, desperate to feel that final pleasure.
“Say it. Promise me!” Bruno ordered.
Mike inhaled as much as he could as the orgasm built and his legs twitched with the impending climax. “I promise. I’ll get fatter for you. I’ll eat whatever you want me to!”
“Are you a gainer?” Bruno asked, suddenly deadly serious.
“What?” Mike asked back, completely thrown by the word and the thought of it being deployed to describe him. He looked down at his body, so completely altered and swollen, not just with the food he had eaten that day, but with the pounds and pounds of pure blubber he had amassed over months and months. He’d let it all happen to him without so much as a second thought. His gym subscription had been a pointless outgoing from his bank account for weeks now. He really was… a gainer.
“Say it!” Bruno demanded, knowing that he had taken Mike over the edge and he was running out of time before he would squirt everywhere.
“I’m a gainer!” Mike shouted as he came. “I’m a gainer!”
The smug smile couldn’t be wiped off Bruno’s face over the next few days, even as Mike had panicked and asked if they could take this new direction of his quite slowly. Bruno had agreed, without any sincerity whatsoever. Mike found that his portion sizes had almost doubled overnight and Bruno immediately began experimenting with new pet names for him, like ‘piggy’ and ‘hog’. They’d also had more sex than even in the early days of their relationship; both allowing the eroticism of food and bloating to overtake them.
As Mike’s paunch swelled into a full gut, he hardly recognised his own kinky reflection. He’d started adopting items from Bruno’s old wardrobe from the time when he’d just finished college. The comments on his weight from colleagues and friends had stopped, just as Bruno had warned him they would; the seriousness and speed of his rapidly increasing weight startling them all into silence. Aside from eating a little bit more, Mike could hardly understand why it was all happening to him so quickly. Pants he had bought only weeks before, were now unable to close; the buttons on his shirts straining to contain the expanding flesh behind them. 
Likewise, Bruno had packed on weight at a greater pace than usual, gaining his annual 25lbs in only three months of Mike becoming an official gainer. His double chin had continued swallowing up his neck and his remarkable gut had a new, more extreme width and sag to it than ever before. The gainer bug inside of him was more ravenous than it had been in years - and it showed!
“Look at you two!” laughed Bruno’s gainer friend, Danny. “Fuck!”
Bruno smiled proudly, lifting his enormous t-shirt up to show off the huge expanse of skin and faint stretch marks across his own monstrous stomach. Meanwhile, Mike held back, unused to such attention and merely smiling at how delighted Bruno was to have gained so much weight.
“And look at you!” Danny marvelled, seeing the stout stomach that was pushing its way out of Mike’s torso. “I hardly recognised you!”
“He’s still a little shy about it, aren’t you?” Bruno grinned at his boyfriend, giving his wider butt a little pat at the same time.
“I can’t believe you finally let Bruno have his way with you!” Danny smiled at Mike. “He’s been wanting to fatten you up ever since you two met.”
Mike looked across at Bruno with surprise. “Since we met?” he asked in alarm.
Bruno smirked, despite the truth slipping out. “Of course I did,” he laughed. “Ever since I first laid eyes on you, I just knew that with a little time and patience, you’d make the perfect piggy for me!”
“Piggy, huh?” Danny chuckled, watching their interaction with more than just bemusement.
“He loves it!” Bruno smiled back excitedly; his tone full of mischief, just as it always was when he was about to overshare. “If he’s eating something and can’t quite finish it all, all I have to do is…”
“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Mike jumped in, full of embarrassment.
“Take a look at his butt too!” Bruno insisted, spinning Mike slightly so that Danny would see.
“Jeez!” Danny marvelled, seeing Mike’s previously tight glutes now so overwhelmed with the fresh fat that had both widened and rounded out his once pretty little rump. “Not to mention those love handles!”
Mike’s face flushed.
“He’s at that stage where everything is starting to jiggle, all over his body. Such a turn on! In fact, he’s already gained his first hundred pounds!” Bruno boasted.
“First?” Mike asked to clarify, trying to keep his composure and hide the erection that the seemingly throwaway comment had just given him.
“It looks like this fatty really got to you, didn’t he?” Danny chuckled, proudly throwing his arm around Bruno’s big shoulders, like he had acomplished something monumental.
“Yeah,” Mike nodded in agreement, looking on at the man he knew he never wanted to be without; the man who had changed his life in multiple ways - and all for the better. “I guess he did…”
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cyripticchronicler · 2 months
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Love Potions and Unspoken Desires - Sirius Black
A mishap with Amortentia has you and Sirius head over heels for each other. Except, your feelings are genuine. But what is his were too?
A/N: I haven't posted in forever and I'm so sorry! I've been busy with school and have been studying a lot. I'm really proud of this one shot though and I hope everyone likes it!! If there are any errors or constructive criticism you want to give please tell me <3
Warnings: Slight mentions of abuse, kissing
Masterlist
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The torch-lit halls guide your way as you walk towards Potions, mind racing at the mere thought of the lesson. You wrap your arms around yourself in an attempt to make yourself more comfortable, trying your best to keep your back straight. 
They slump as soon as you enter the room.
“You’re late,” Professor Slughorn announces loudly causing your cheeks to heat. Everyone's heads whipped around to face you and you prayed to Merlin the ground would swallow you up whole. 
You clear your throat so your voice doesn't come out scratchy, “Sorry, Professor. I was helping out in Transfiguration.”
He nods in dismissal and you take that as your queue to find a seat, eyes scanning the crowded room for an empty spot. Your eyes land on the only free seat next to Sirius Black and you tense.  You can barely be in the same room as him and now you're going to have to sit next to you? Merlin, you wish this day was over. 
And he looks so pretty today too. His hair was freshly washed, Gryffindor tie slung loosely around his neck, and shirt sleeves pulled up to his elbows. 
A pointed cough snaps you out of your thoughts and you hurry towards the seat, cheeks flushing in embarrassment. 
You’re pretty sure everyone just saw you check out Sirius Black. 
Could this day get any worse?
Turns out it could. 
You go to chuck your bag underneath the table but miss by a long shot, the bottom of your school bag hitting Sirius in the face, causing him to let out a surprised groan. Some people behind you let out a laugh and you squeeze your eyes shut, kicking your bag underneath the table and sitting in your seat. 
You barely make eye contact before you look away, muttering a hushed ‘sorry’ and attempting to catch up on the notes you missed. 
“Today we’re making Amortentia. Can someone tell me what this is?” At the lack of answers, he turns to you with a pointed look.
You raise your hand nervously. “It’s the most potent love potion. When consumed it causes a powerful infatuation or obsession in the drinker towards the person who administered the potion. it does not create genuine love; rather, it amplifies preexisting feelings or creates an artificial attraction.”
“Very good. Five points to Gryffindor.”
You nod your head awkwardly and look back down at your notes. 
“Write down the ingredients and instructions and then get started. You’re going to be working with the people next to you.”
You tense up, head snapping up. Sirius chuckles next to you and you turn to face him. 
“Looks like we’re working together, Love. I’ll go get the ingredients.”
You nod your head awkwardly, too shocked to respond. Did he just call you love? Are you okay?
Your cheeks heat and you groan internally at yourself. Stop blushing you dipshit. 
Attempting to distract yourself, you make quick work of cleaning the workspace, spotting Sirius talking to James and Remus out of the corner of your eye. James smacks Sirius’ back, whispering something that causes Remus to shake his head and Sirius to grin. 
He comes back a minute later, ingredients in hand. 
“You seem to know a lot about this potion, you ever used it on someone?” He smirks teasingly causing your cheeks to flush. “No,” You mutter quietly, “I just like making potions.”
He nodded in acknowledgement, eyes searching your face. You look away quickly, his stare burning your face as you pour some ingredients into the cauldron. 
You continue the work in comfortable - for him at least- silence, working with him easier than ever. 
You were finished in no time, grinning in triumph as you tried not to breathe in the strong smell. 
“Well done you too! Grab a vile and bottle some up why don't you.” Professor Slughorn smiles, hurrying off to another table whose cauldron is smoking. 
“Good job, love. I might have to work with you more,” Sirius flirts and you jerk in surprise, hand flying back and knocking the vile that he was holding with your own, Amortentia effectively spilling over you both. 
His eyes grow dilated in seconds and you assume yours do the same, heart thumping and palms sweating as you stare up at him with heart eyes. 
“I-I'm so sorry.” You force out, too focused on how he looked at you like you hung the moon. 
“For?” He questions, seemingly in a daze. He looks down at his shirt and grins. “Right, it’s no problem, Love. You can do nothing wrong in my eyes.” He flirts and you go back to respond but are successfully cut off by James. 
“Sirius! You’re in deep shit, man.” He laughs, slapping him on the back. You track the hand, wishing it was yours instead.
Sirius doesn’t respond, too busy grinning at you. Merlin, this potion is good.
“Dear, dear.” Professor Slughorn mutters as he comes to inspect the chaos. “Right, it will wear off soon. You’re just going to be partially in love with each other for a bit.”
Sirius grins, “I am in love with her-” James cuts him off with a hand on the shoulder, dragging him towards the door. “I’ll just keep him away until the potion wears off-”
“The class isn’t over-” Professor Slughorn protests but James is already gone. You frown in disappointment, already missing Sirius. 
It was a few hours later, the potion's effects still thrumming through your blood, your infatuation for him stronger than ever. You were distracted the whole day, mind always seeming to stray away to thoughts of Sirius. How pretty he looked, how he’d let you put his hair up, maybe even braid it, how he’d smile at you. He’d probably be great in bed too- 
“You’re doing it again.” Lily mutters, face scrunched up in disgust and you groan in shame. “It’s like my feelings for him have been amplified by 100. It’s amazing but unbearable at the same time.”
She grabs your hand in comfort, grabbing the mashed potatoes with her other hand and piling them onto her plate. You’re in the Great Hall for dinner, loud chattering filling the crowded space. From just a few feet away Sirius and his friends sit and if you listen hard enough you can hear James’ obnoxious laugh. 
“I'm sure the potion will wear off soon,” Alice reassures from beside you, grinning at you in hopes of making you feel better.
You shake your head in disagreement. “It’s only been two hours and these potions can last for days.”
“We just have to keep you away from him. How hard can that be?”
Very hard, you realise, eyes widening at the sight of Sirius Black stalking towards you, encouraged by the jeering of his friends. 
“Hello, Love.” He smiles, eyes soft as he admires your face. You sigh, chin resting on your hand, too distracted by his beauty to respond. He seems too distracted by your beauty to call you out on your silence.
“Fucking hell,” Lily whispers from somewhere behind you but you pay her no mind, continuing to smile at Sirius as he does the same. 
A loud laugh from James who still sits at the table, snaps him out of his daze, “W-would you want to have breakfast with me tomorrow?”
You nod immediately, smile blinding, probably losing a few brain cells from how intensely you were nodding. 
He flashes his pearly whites, “Great! I’ll meet you in the common room at seven?” He questions and you nod, too distracted by this freckle you just spotted right underneath his eye. He doesn’t make a move to go, eyes tracing your jawline slowly. 
“Okay!” You jump at Lily’s hands on your shoulders, slowly dragging you out of the hall. “Time to say goodbye.” You and Sirius both frown. “Don’t be like that, you’ll see each other tomorrow.” She grabs your arm and waves it back and forth, “Now say bye-bye.”
“Bye,” You whisper, cheeks flushing. “Bye, Love.” He mutters back. 
“Why did today of all days be the day nothing turned out properly!” You whine, head falling in defeat onto your folded arms that rest on your dresser, abandoned mascara bottle hanging loosely in your hand. 
Lily coos softly from behind you, distracted by getting dressed. “Sweetheart, you look amazing. You’re not having a bad eyelash day and your hair looks great! Sirius is going to fall to his knees when he sees you.”
You look up from your arms slowly, meeting Lily’s eyes in the mirror, “You think?” You question hopefully. She nods. “And my eyelashes look okay?” She nods again and you smile softly. “Thank you,” You stand up, moving to get dressed. “I don’t even know why I care so much, it’s just breakfast. I swear this love potion is making me go crazy.”
“Sure, it’s the ‘love potion’ that’s making you go crazy,” Lily mutters sarcastically from behind you but you’re too busy daydreaming about Sirius’ eyes to notice. 
“Hello.” You mutter, successfully gaining Sirius’ attention as he turns to face you. He’s dressed in his uniform but he’s obviously tried to tidy it up a little bit. His usually loose tie wrapped tightly around his neck, his white t-shirt tucked into his freshly ironed slacks. “You look nice today, but-” You walk over, hand gripping his tie and losing it. “That’s better.”
You notice a faint blush on his cheeks and grin. “Thank you, love. So do you. Are you ready for breakfast?” 
You nod you both start walking to the hall together, his hand brushing yours slightly. You take in a deep breath for confidence, trying to calm your racing heart as you link your fingers through his. 
He doesn't pull away. 
You make it into the hall a few minutes later, taking a seat beside Sirius. James attempts to sit across from us but one look from Sirius sends him sitting at the end of the table beside Remus, a pout on his lips. 
“You didn't have to send him away,” You mutter, feeling bad. 
“He’ll live. Besides, I wanted to spend time with you.” Sirius states, causing you to blush. He grabs your plate, piling it with the stuff you get every morning before handing it back to you.
“How do you know what I eat for breakfast?” You question, face scrunched in confusion. Sirius pauses his movements of piling his own plate, cheeks tinted pink. “I-I guess the potion has made me more aware of what you eat.”
“Yeah, but the incident happened after breakfast yesterday.”
He shrugs, “Huh, I don’t know then.”
“Have you-”
“Do you like to read? There's this really pretty bookstore that just opened up in Hogsmeade. Maybe we can go after breakfast? Get some butter beer too?”
You decide to let it go, “Yeah, I’d love to go. I’ve been meaning to get some more books to read, too.”
He grins, eyes sparkling in delight as he stares into your eyes, “Great! It’s a date.”
“I don’t believe you!” You laugh, knocking your shoulder against Sirius’, hands linked as you make your way down the snowy path to Hogsmeade.
“It’s true!” Sirius insists, pulling you closer, nose red from the cold. He looks so pretty, you think. If only his feelings for you were true. 
“And Euphemia let you stay after that? She must have a heart of gold.” You tease playfulling, relishing in his laugh that warms your insides. 
“Oh she does, I owe her my life.” Before you can question him he’s pulling you towards The Three Broomsticks. “Now c’mon, let's get you a butterbeer before you freeze to death.”
You comply, following him into the warm building, the quiet talks of chatter greeting you as Sirius leads you to a table in the corner. 
“So,” He begins, leaning forward for suspense. “Tell me something that you’ve told no one else.”
You impulsively grab his hand, letting it warm up your cold one. He doesn't mention it as you speak, “Um, in first year I once walked in on The Grey Lady and The Bloody Baron trying to ‘get it on.’ I was too traumatized to tell anyone.”
He stares at you, shellshocked. “Well- That’s certainly not what I was expecting. Is that even possible?”
You chuckle quietly at his shocked impression, “No, actually. They kept on going through each other. It was horrible to watch.”
“Your poor eyes,” He winces in sympathy, squeezing your hand tightly. 
“It’s still engraved in my mind. It’s put me off kissing ever since.”
He freezes slightly. “So you haven't kissed anyone?” He questions quietly, eyes shining in delight. Your cheeks flush, “No.”
He takes in a breath, leaning forward and you instinctively do the same until your noses are brushing. “So if I were to kiss you right now, I’d be the first one to ever touch these precious lips?” You nod and his eyes squeeze shut. 
“Fuck.” He mutters under his breath. “Can I-”
“Here are your two butterbeers.” You jerk back at the unexpected voice, watching as Sirius does the same. “T-thank you,” You mutter to the waitress who is already gone, taking a big gulp of your butterbeer in the hope of cooling down your flushed body. 
You sit in silence until it gets too awkward for you and you attempt to start a conversation, “We’re still going to the bookstore after this, right?”
He jumps, not expecting you to speak before he breaks out into a relaxed grin. “Of course, Love. I’m not much of a reader but I know you are.”
“Oh, that’s sweet. If you don’t want to go then we can just head back-” “I want to go. I want to spend time with you.”
“Oh.” You curse internally. You’ve already said ‘Oh.’ “Thank you? Yeah, thank you.” He laughs, “Don’t thank me, love.”
You flush, “Sorry-” “And don't say sorry either.”
You nod, “Sorry- I mean, shit.” He laughs at your ramble causing your cheeks to go bright red. You attempt to turn the conversation around, “What do you mean you owe Euphemia your life?” He visibly tenses and you curse. Fucking idiot.
“You don’t have to- That was rude-” He links your fingers together, placing them on the table and successfully cutting you off. 
“It’s okay. I trust you, love.” He grins but it seems fake. “My parents and I never got along, and after I joined Gryfindor things started getting worse. Whenever they got violent I went to James and Euphemia would take care of me. My family successfully kicked me out last summer and I’ve been living with James ever since.” He falls quiet and you squeeze his hand. 
“I’m sorry-” You cut yourself off at his glare. “I hope you’re okay.”
He manages a grin, a true one this time. “I’m okay, especially with you.” He teases causing your cheeks to flush. 
“That’ll change once the potion wears off,” You attempt to joke but Sirius is silent. “Yeah…”
Crickets. 
“Want to go check out the bookstore?” You grasp at any shred of confidence. 
Sirius practically jumps out of his seat, taking you with him. “Let’s go.”
—-
“I had fun tonight.” You state, awkwardly standing by the steps that will lead you to your dorm. Sirius stalks closer towards you. 
“I did too,” He grins, diamonds in his eyes as he brushes your hair behind your ear before cradling your cheek gently. “Remember to tell me what you thought of that book,” He shrugs down at the book in your hand, unable to keep his eyes off you.
“Yeah. I should go…” You make no move to leave and Sirius makes no move to remove his hand from your cheek. 
“You should,” He whispers, eyes trained on your lips, swollen from how many times you’ve bitten it out of nervousness. 
And then his lips are on yours. 
And then you're kissing him back. 
And your back is against the wall, his tongue pushes into your mouth, and he’s holding your waist. You can't breathe and you're scratching your nails down his shirt-clad back until he groans against your mouth in pleasure. 
And then you’re pulling away. “Stop,” You whisper against his lips.
He stops immediately, taking a few steps away from you, “I-I’m sorry. I should’ve asked.” His lips are swollen and wet and you want nothing more than to kiss him again.
But you can't.
“No, I’m sorry.” You hide your face in your hands, back against the wall. “I-I should’ve said no to the date. I just- I wanted so badly for your feelings to be real. That you’d actually like me but it’s not fair on you. And I’m sorry.”
He looks at you like you’ve grown another head. “I do like you.”
You shake your head, “Sirius-” “I do! I’ve liked you for years. I’ve been wanting to tell you but you just make me so nervous-” “Sirius-”
“C’mon, listen to me-” “This is the potion!” 
“The potion wore off hours ago and you know it!”
You slump against the wall in defeat, legs against your chest as you look away from him. You know he’s right. The once amplified feelings you had for him are more sane and you no longer feel like you’d kill every single person who so much as looked at him the wrong way. 
“You can’t like me back. I don’t believe you.”
He crouches down in front of you, hands shaking as he reaches to touch your knee. “Why don’t you believe me, my love?” He questions, his voice much quieter than it was before.
“Because you’re Sirius Black,” You whisper like it explains everything. And it does. He’s Sirius Black, the golden boy who could have anyone he wanted.
“And you’re you. If anything I don’t deserve you. You’re smart, beautiful, way out of my league.” You open your mouth to protest but he cuts you off. “But I’m going to work every day to be the man you deserve because I want you. So badly it hurts.”
“I want you too,” You mutter shyly, you look into his eyes that still look at you like you’ve hung the moon. 
“Aw my love,” He pulls you closer, breath fanning your cheek. “You’ve had me for a long time.”
Taglist - If you want to be removed feel free to comment. I won't be offended :)
@aremuslupinsimp
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de4dlyniightshade · 4 months
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just thinking about dom!spencer taking our virginity 😔😔😔 i want him
honestly i'm forever and always gonna be a sub!spencer truther BUT!!! anything to do with a dilf x virgin!reader i will CONSUME THOROUGHLY!
queue the headcanon segment bcs idk how to stfu;)
softdom!spencer!:
he'd be so sweet and gentle through the whole thing, making sure to praise you and reassure you and tell you how beautiful you are:,)
"pretty girl/boy/baby" is a MUST!!! loves the way you blush when he calls you that.
all the praise in the world!!! i can't stress enough how much he'd praise you. "that's it, doing so good, baby" COME ON. SPENCER REID WRITTEN ALL OVER IT YOU CANT TELL ME OTHERWISE.
makes sure that you finish. doesn't matter if it takes all night. he's a strong believer that if both participants don't finish then there's no point even doing it.
would melt at your noises, telling you that you didn't need to hold them back and not to be embarrassed to be loud.
makes sure to go really slow when entering you, he wants to make it as comfortable and pain free as he possibly can so you'll look back on the memory fondly rather than remembering how badly it hurt.
lots of kisses! would give you so many soft little pecks on your shoulder, neck, cheeks, forehead and lips ofc.
aftercare for the next 14 business days, would run you a bath or shower and get in with you, washing your hair and body and just holding you under the warm water. would tell you at least 100 times how well you did and!!! would make your favourite snack and watch your favourite movie while you cuddle.
kinda harddom!spencer!:
would literally go feral trying to not fuck you into next year as soon as he feels you wrap around him.
sloppy making out is a must, he can't get enough of how you become so fucked out that you can hardly even kiss him properly.
dumbification!!! almost loses it when you start babbling incorrectly and would say some shit like "what's the matter? fucked dumb already?" with a shit eating grin.
"good girl/boy" all the fucking way, all the fucking time.
he'd be gentle to begin with as not to hurt you but as soon you tell him he can go faster he runs with it and starts pounding into you, hands gripping your hips to keep you still.
makes sure to fuck you good so you'll come back for more and basically become his personal fuck toy.
literally almost cums on the spot when he sees tears fall from your eyes at how good he's making you feel.
can't help but leave marks on your neck and shoulder while he's fucking you so that others will see them.
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finelinevogue · 10 months
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when in rome
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summary - just a few random clips from a holiday to rome
word count - +3k
pairing - husband!harry x reader
a/n - can’t lie… this could literally be set anywhere and there’s no real plot, but i hope yous enjoy it all the same <33
at the airport
“Hey, give me that.”
Harry holds out his hand for you to pass over the suitcase to him, claiming that he should be the one to pull it not you.
You were originally going to have two suitcases, but it turns out that neither of you were packing heavy and so one suitcase it was.
“I’m not incapable.” You sigh.
“I’m not saying that. I would just feel better if y’let me pull it.” Harry plucks your fingers off the handle one by one, distracting you with a kiss as he does so to make it easier for himself, before claiming the suitcase for himself.
“I’m not gonna argue with you at this time in the morning.” You give him another sigh.
You walk behind Harry as he directs you from the Uber to the terminal door.
It is holiday time and you and Harry have decided on a getaway to Italy, Rome. One of the most romantic cities in Europe and famous for its history and pizza.
Harry decided that you would fly Economy, rather than taking the jet, because it was more practical for a bunch of different reasons that you didn’t really understand.
Hence why you are grumpy now.
You had to get up at 2AM, to get and Uber and be through security before your flight leaves at 7:30AM.
Clad in one of Harry’s oversized hoodies and gym shorts, your legs are cold, your eyes are heavy from tiredness and your body aches from the run Harry made you go on yesterday.
You rub your eye free of sleep and accidentally bump into Harry as he’s stopped.
Harry is wearing a similar hoodie to you, because he couldn’t wear his favourite one due to lending it to you, running shorts and of course a pair of sunglasses and a hat.
“Sorry. After you.” Harry politely lets an old couple pass, which is why you were stopped short.
He turns around to you to make sure you’re okay and smiles when he sees you unattractively yawn. You look like a small kitten who has just been awoken.
“There better be a coffee shop somewhere in here.” You say as you walk through the doors.
The airport is already busy with hundreds of people buzzing to get out of this dreary country and into hotter destinations.
“Also, I love your fans, but I swear to God if one of them approaches us this morning…” You say.
Harry chuckles, “Yeah? What will you do, love hmm?”
“Turn into the Hulk.”
“I feel sorry for them already.” Harry smiles and you hit him in his arm as a joking reply.
You stand together in a snaking queue to check in and then to get through security, until you’ve made it to the other side successfully. Also, without anyone publicly exclaiming that Harry is here.
You hold Harry’s hand as you walk next to each other out of security.
“Y’wanna get coffee first? Or find somewhere to sit?” Harry asks you, hoping you’re listening but he can’t tell because your hood is up.
“Dunno.” You say indecisively, beyond tired.
“Let’s go find somewhere and then I’ll go get us coffees, yeah? You can just sit and look pretty.” He squeezes your hand.
“No. I wanna stay with you.” You wrap your other hand around his forearm and hold him close, pressing your face against his arm also.
“Okay, okay. Well let’s go this way then.”
Harry directs you to the coffee bar and you both stand in another queue as you wait to order.
“Y’want your usual?” Harry asks and you nod.
When Harry’s called over, he makes sure to bring you with him and scans the bakery section one more time.
“Hi honey! What can I get for you?” The woman behind the counter asks.
“Morning. Hi. Um, can we have one croissant, one pain au chocolat, one black coffee and one latte with a shot of caramel please. Thank you.”
As Harry pays on your shared bank card, you thank him with a small voice.
“Thank you.” You hug into his arm more.
“It’s okay.” He kisses the top of your head. He wants to kiss your lips, but he also wants to remain as PG as possible in such a public space just in case someone is secretly filming.
After you’ve collected your order, you go and find a table to sit at. You find a small booth that overlooks the runway, so you can watch the planes take off. Harry knows it’s one of your favourite things to do in an airport, so he chose this spot on purpose.
You make small talk as you eat, both of you sat on the same side of the booth so that you can lean on Harry to rest once you’ve finished.
You talk about the planes taking off and your potential itinerary for the next couple of days. Harry just listens to your rambles as he finishes your pastry too, because you couldn’t finish it.
“Can I sleep on you on the plane?” You ask.
“‘Course y’can, baby. Think we have a window seat and a middle seat.”
“Can I sit by the window?”
“Yeah. You can lean on my shoulder if y’want.”
“Please. Thank you.”
“Anything for you, love, you know that.” He kisses your forehead again.
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checking in
You get out of the Uber first.
It is already so humid here in Rome and it’s just gone midday.
Your hotel is right in the centre of Rome, just a few streets over from the Trevi Fountain and then a few more streets over from the Gucci store too.
Harry made sure to book somewhere that would be accessible to the majority of everything. Money wasn’t an issue. In fact, it wouldn’t surprise you it Harry even booked the most expensive hotel in Rome.
The porter greets you and takes your suitcase for you. Harry tops the driver and thanks him with the Italian he’s been learning.
Harry takes your hand as you walk inside, thankful for the air conditioning in the building.
“Buonjiorno.” The man behind the desk greets you.
“Buonjiorno.” Harry replies. “We’re here to check in?”
You were a little early but decided you would try to check in anyways.
“Of course. Name, please?”
“Styles.”
“Both of you?”
“Yes.” Harry can’t help but smirk as he speaks. You nudge him, because you feel the same way.
“I have… Uh, Y/N Styles and Harry Styles?”
“Sí.” Harry nods.
“For 4 nights?”
“Sí.”
“Okay.” The man shuffles around some papers and types some things on the computer. “So your room number is 406. This is the fourth floor. You can take the lift up, which is just over there. Breakfast is included, which will be on the terrace between 7 and 10.”
“Amazing.” You smile for what feels like the first time since landing.
You’ve been so tired that you have found it hard to keep your eyes open and pretend like you’re alive.
“The pool is on the roof and will be open 7AM until midnight. The gym facilities are open all the time. Room service is three euros per call. These are your key cards and we hope you enjoy your stay.”
“Grazie.”
“Grazie.” You and Harry both thank the man and make your way over to the lift.
A few minutes later and Harry is opening your hotel room door.
You step inside and immediately fall in love. It’s decorated with marble floors and high ceilings with gorgeous artwork - probably that inspired of the Sistine Chapel.
The bed is a large queen size bed with lots of pillows and comforters. There’s a long chair at the foot of the bed and a sofa just across from that.
The most captivating thing about the room is the three sets of french doors, which all open onto a small balcony. There’s sheer curtains draped over the ceiling length doors, softly blowing in the wind.
Beyond that is the view that money did actually buy.
A view of the majority of Rome. You could see St Peters perfectly and Harry mentioned that the sun set will be visible from this room too. All the small buildings below and the little people on their way to work or tourists wandering.
“And?” Harry prompts.
“And what?” You twirl around to see him wandering over, after having shut the door and abandoned the suitcase.
“Is this okay?”
“Is that a serious question?” You raise your eyebrows.
You open your arms as Harry walks into you, wrapping his arms over your shoulders. He breathes you in and squeezes you tight and you follow suit.
“Mm. Want you to have the best time.”
“Harry, babe, this is perfect. More than perfect. Thank you for everything.” Your voice is muffled by speaking into Harry’s jumper.
Harry kisses you on the head a couple of times.
“Do y’want to go for a nap and then go have a wander?”
“Yes please.”
“M’kay.”
It doesn’t take you both long to get comfortable in the bed. Harry opens a door to let in a better breeze and the air con is on full to make sure you don’t overheat.
Harry lays behind you, where you’re laying on your side. Your hood is off now, because Harry likes to lean his face into your neck when you sleep. He likes to breathe in your homely scent and warmth.
His hand lays on your stomach, underneath his jumper, and rubs little circles with his fingers.
You start giggling and Harry asks what’s up with you.
“Tickles.” You hum softly, quite relaxed by the funny feeling.
“Does it now? Y’skins so soft, so I can’t help myself.”
“Won’t be soft forever. Especially if you keep on trying to get me pregnant.”
Harry kisses your neck and leaves a little mark with his teeth. His hand spreads over the span of your stomach and holds it there.
“Won’t care. When you’re pregnant, I am only going to love you and your body twice as much.”
“You say that now…”
“And I’ll say it again when the time comes.” Harry cute you off from any more deprecating thoughts. “Now shush. I’m trying to make sure you get your beauty sleep.”
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exploring back alleys
You and Harry walk hand in hand down a busy street in Rome.
It is so hot and humid that your bodies are so sticky from the heat, but you hold onto each others hands nonetheless because you are simply that attached to one another.
Harry leads the way, walking around the crowds of tourists and past random shops selling art and Rome tat.
He turns around and catches you admiring all the colourful buildings and wonderful Roman architecture, and he can’t help but smile at your wonderous face.
You feel a tug on your hand Harry’s holding and giggle a little when you feel him pulling you towards a back alley.
He runs a little quicker and you have to keep up with him. You check behind you to see if he is running away from something, but no one is following and you think he’s mad for running now.
“Harry!” You laugh as he makes a harsh right and pulls you down another side street.
This one bends slightly in the middle so you can’t see the street entrance either which way.
You don’t have the time to ask any questions before Harry is pushing you against a brick wall painted apricot. He holds his hands on your face and presses his lips hungrily onto yours.
You’re not only hot from the weather, now, but also from how attracted your husband is in this moment.
You groan as he steps forward so he’s leaning infinitely close into your body. You sigh when he moves his head to the side to kiss your better, cupping your hands over his to get a guide on which way he will move next.
When he pulls away you sadly pout.
He laughs at your expression and decides to kiss you again, even longer this time. He kisses and kisses you until you make the move to pull away, before you pass out from lack of breathing.
You laugh first and then Harry follows.
Both of you have never felt happiness like this. Just happy being simply together.
“You’re so…”
“I’m so what, baby?” Harry laughs breathlessly.
“I don’t even know.” You laugh, cupping his cheek and flitting your eyes between both of his as you try to decided which one is prettier. “I do know that I love you, like a lot.”
“Only a lot?”
“Well, like as much as the universe is big.” You give him a warm summers smile.
“Oh well that’s alright then.”
He leans forwards and seals his lips with yours again. You kiss him with all the love you have pocketed for him and don’t let him go until you hear footsteps approaching.
It’s a man and his daughter on their way somewhere.
As they walk past, Harry and you loosen your hold on one another as you don’t want to display too much PDA.
Once they’ve gone Harry giggles.
“What?” You ask.
“Just thinking how that’ll be me someday. Lost in a city with our daughter ‘cause I’m too stubborn to use a map and she’ll probably be distracting me with her gorgeous face she got from her mum…” He trails off.
“That was an intense thought, babe.”
“Mm. It’s been on my mind a lot lately. Having a baby with you, I mean.”
“It’s been on my mind too.”
That’s all that’s said, but you both smile at each other knowingly that as of today you’re starting your future together.
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dining out
Harry looks divine.
Dressed in an unbuttoned white linen shirt that sits on top of a white vest, with a pair of dark navy blue cotton shorts and his rusty old white vans, he has never looked so gorgeous.
It’s the subtle burn and tan of his skin that has you melting for him.
You are currently clipping his hair back with one of your small hair grips for him. He can do it himself, but he prefers it when it comes from you.
You’re both freshly showered and very hungry.
Sweet Disposition by the Temper Trap is playing in the background as you both get ready for dinner in your hotel room. After walking through Rome for the day, you spent some time in the swimming pool together and then showered together before getting ready.
“Y’look beautiful, m’love.” Harry says, watching you through the mirror.
“Thank you.” You speak softly, cheeks flushing over his compliment.
“This red dress on you is just… it’s perfect. You look perfect.”
Your red mini dress shows of your legs that Harry admires so much, and paired with a pair of platform sandals you look like a model straight from Vogue.
“Feel pretty, actually.”
“Good. Y’look prettier than anyone has ever looked in that dress.” Harry knows how to charm you best.
“Baby, you need to stop complimenting me otherwise we’ll miss our reservation.” You laugh, finishing clipping his hair.
“Can’t help myself. So lucky you chose me.” Harry picks your ring finger up and kisses over the ring that symbolises eternity between you.
“I’ll always choose you. You are too handsome not to.”
An hour later and you’re sitting at the restaurant.
Harry pulled your chair out for you and made sure you were comfortable before sitting in his own chair.
The restaurant is on a lovely little side street, decorated with fairy lights across the terracotta wall. There are ivy vines growing there too and the atmosphere is just peaceful.
There are a few families and other couples here too. It’s not a very fancy restaurant as Harry admitted that the best restaurants in Italy are the most homely and authentic ones.
The waiter was already fetching some water for you whilst you looked the menu.
“What are you thinking, baby?” You ask Harry, from where he is sat across from you.
“Maybe just a Margarita pizza.”
“Really?” You question his taste in food.
“Need something simple but good tasting tonight.”
“Okay, well at least get the bruschetta with me for starters?” You ask, wanting to share something with him.
“Sounds good, yeah.”
When the food comes, you feed Harry some of your pasta whilst Harry gifts you a slice of pizza. Both dishes are beautiful and cooked perfectly.
You both laugh and have the most amazing evening.
The best moment of the evening is when an old couple walk past you, holding each others hands.
“You two are so beautiful together.” The old man says.
“Thank you so much.” Harry smiles and holds your hand in his from across the table.
“Your love reminds me of ours. Precious. Forever.” He goes on to say and you have to swallow back the tears from how sweet his words are.
Harry smiles at you.
“Definitely forever.”
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