#that i self sabotage and dont even look into yhe internships i want

[timelord-of-the-moon]

...

#whats realy sad to me is that every since it started I can never go back to life before the pandemic #every day is so hard and even though this past year its felt like its close to being over #it will never be the same as before #my social anxiety is worse i have no friends and i realy just crave simplicity and comfort in life #and like i just wish i was older becuase i turned 21 the first year of the pandemic in the worst of it #becoming an adult is hard enough but i am so stunted i feel #not just like 21 can drink and party i dont give a shit about that its like i should be getting my life together #and like yeah ive sort of fallen into a career in theatre and i fill a much needed space in my college theatre program #which im greatful for them paying me for for a year now #but fuck it doesnt feel like i had a choice or a say in the matter #and thats besides the point #another problem and why everything feels so fucking complicated is that i dont have a plan for after college and its so stressing that #that i self sabotage and dont even look into yhe internships i want #i am so sad.. all the time. #but man i realy wish that i didnt have to live out my first years as an adult like this #at 20 i was not prepared at all for the pandemic #and now at 23 i feel so lost #i just wish life was more simple and straightforward becuase nothing is #and especially at my job as SM everything is so fucking complicated and i always feel like i dont even know what im doing #fuck just ignore me #but if anyone has any adivse please let me know