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#this seriously needs to be properly edited
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I absolutely love the idea that Elrond took one look at Annatar and immediately disliked him. He just instantly failed the vibe check. And the best part is about that is that there are so, so many reasons Elrond might've immediately mistrusted Annatar, ranging from drama to comedy. I've compiled a few of my favorites below:
Vague, Luthien-related "not this motherfucker again" senses (always a classic)
Something about Annatar reminded Elrond of Maedhros's description of Sauron, even if he couldn't quite connect the dots at the time (good if you want to be emotional about Kidnap dads)
Annatar's general attitude really didn't fit with his story that he was an emissary of the Valar (if you want to be pro-Valar)
Alternately, Elrond fully believed that Annatar was from the west, but had serious problems with the Valar and didn't trust anyone they'd sent (if you want to be anti-Valar)
Vague foresight visions (for a metaphysical reason)
Elrond thinks that Annatar's appearance in Lindon is just a little too politically convenient (for a very practical reason)
Galadriel had warned Elrond that something like this might happen (I would also listen to Galadriel)
Annatar was being really, really unsubtle about being evil and Elrond was just the first person to point out that maybe the guy asking around about the best way to poison an elf without being caught shouldn't be allowed to stay in the city (Annatar got better at the whole 'evil in disguise' thing in Eregion)
Elrond has already heard enough traveling salesmen in his life and doesn't have patience for another one (Lindon really needs a 'no soliciting' sign)
Annatar made a vaguely offensive comment about Elrond being a half-elf and Elrond ran out of tolerance for that roughly an Age ago (good for him!)
Annatar said that Lindon needed a Maia, and excuse me, Lindon is already under Elrond's protection, it does not need another Maia wandering around causing problems! (Maiar territoriality my beloved)
Annatar said that Gil-Galad needed a Maiarin advisor, and, excuse me, Gil-Galad is Elrond's king, he does not need another Maia to whisper jokes to him during meetings, or to tenderly braid his hair, or to be his messenger bird. Elrond does all that perfectly fine, thank you! (Maiar territoriality, good for them edition)
Annatar and Elrond would've gotten along fine if Gil-Galad had bothered to introduce them properly, but seriously, you can't just toss them in a room together! Everyone knows that Maiar need time to acclimate to each other's presences first! You have to use a wall to separate them for a couple days! (did Gil-Galad even do his research before allowing a Maia-adjacent being to be his herald?)
Elrond absolutely refused to explain his reasons but everyone still listened because at that point they knew nothing good came from ignoring his warnings (smart choice)
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elisa20beth · 11 months
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A Night to Remember
pairing: Jess McCready x Reader
warning: refrences to a fem presenting!reader, alcohol, smoking. Also written at 2am so that obviously requires a warning in itself Notes: your honor, I love her. Also I'm majorly late the A League of Their Own party so I highly doubted people will see this. Crossing my fingers for more Jess content S2, esp. Jess and Lu!!!
fluff, fluff, fluff
word count: 1.5k
summary: Reader decides to sneak out to a gay bar for the first time. Unfortunately Jess sees her and follows her there. Words are exchanged and they realize maybe nothing is impossible...
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You press your ear against the door as you wait for the creaky floors to quiet down as Beverly brushes past your door. You look down at your watch; 10:00 at the mark. Ever since you almost got caught being out past curfew, you vowed to never do it again, making sure to always wait exactly 30 minutes post-curfew before stepping outside your room, Beverly’s snores posing as a quiet melody of reassurance. Right as you heard her door close, you pushed away from the door, striding over to your armoire, where your (f/c) dress was hanging in front. You start to slip out of your satin pajamas as you nervously glance over to the dress.
What if something goes wrong or what if someone finds out, your mind runs. 
You can't risk getting your secret out, not with your baseball future at risk. You finish buttoning up the dress as you turn around to face the mirror. You smooth out non-existent wrinkles as your eyes rake over your image. The small white scalloped collar stood stark from the dark buttons and belt but coordinated perfectly with the pleated skirt, ending just below your knees. 
Taking a deep breath, you move to sit on your bed, rolling your stockings up, pausing as you see your roommate move in her sleep. You slowly get up and move over to the small table at the end of the bed. Choosing a lipstick to match a perfect outfit. If you look good, then you’ll feel good, at least that's what your Ma always told you.
You pick up your handbag as you slowly twist open the metal doorknob. Sliding out into the dark hallway, you glide down the stairs, stepping into the non-squeaky areas of each step. You stop in front of the last obstacle; the loud front door. You hesitantly reach out for the ornate door knob and slowly twist it. Opening the door enough, you quietly slip out and speed up to a brisk walk out into the open world. But even through all your planned and careful actions, you fail to notice the figure leaning on the porch fence, smoking a cigarette. 
As you walk past the shed, you turn around to glance at the place you've called home for the last month. The home of the Rockford Peaches. Being a part of the team gave you a sense of confidence you didn’t have before, even though it wasn't as high as your teammates like Greta, Jo, or Jess. 
Jess. You didn’t know when it started. Was it when you heard her complain about screwing up at the try-outs that first night, or when you bonded over Beverly’s strict rules, or when you saw her ferocious mindset the first time you saw her? All you knew was that when you started to fall, you fell hard and fast. You had never felt like that before. Maybe the occasional pretty girl who caught your breath at school back home, but nothing like this. You couldn't let yourself live like this any longer, keeping it a secret for so long. You didn't know if you were doing this for her or yourself but you couldn't let yourself quit now. So you turned around, with a new sense of confidence as you marched towards the safe haven to figure out who you were.
Jess looked up to the sound of the front door softly closing, moving her eyes towards your figure, all dolled up. She’d always find a bit of fun in teasing you, enjoying how meek you would become as a result. Besides Carson’s late-night practices and the games, there wasn't much to do, causing her to get bored, a lot. 
As she watched you walk towards the shed, away from her eyesight, she put out her cigarette and started to follow you, curious about where you were going, past curfew may she add. Ten minutes in, she realized you were heading in the direction of the gay bar Lu and she frequented often. It didn't come as a shock to her; on multiple occasions, catching you staring at her, quickly turning away when you realized she’d seen. But a smile rose to her face as she realized it confirmed her suspicions. Maybe she'd actually have a chance.
Watching you stop, she quickly hid behind the car parked near the curb as she saw you close your eyes, breathing in deeply before you opened the door and escaped from her view. Walking back around the car, Jess made sure to take her time before making her presence known, allowing you to get comfortable before scaring you off. 
As you stepped inside the building, you felt a sense of safety and love rush over you as you started walking through the hallway, pieces of art adorning the walls. Approaching the main area, you felt your heartbeat quicken, worried if you would feel welcome. Yet that worry faded away as you took in the scene. Couples mingling at the bar and dancing the night away. Sounds of joy and love filled the room, joining the lively voice and signing into the mic. You make a beeline towards the bar and slide into an empty seat. 
“Welcome to the Moxie Salon, what can I get for you sweets?” The bartender asks as you look up.
“Umm,” you start, “Could I just get a beer?”
“Sure can! Say, I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before” He adds.
“This is my first time but I don't think it’ll be my last” You finish with a smile.
The bartender mirrors your expression as he turns back around. You look around at your surroundings, feeling a sense of serenity. 
“Hey, could you make that two beers?” a familiar voice adds. 
You freeze up as you feel someone slide into the empty seat next to you. You refused to look up as you felt their burning gaze.
“What brings you here (n/n)?”
You felt your cheeks burn as you slowly met Jess’s eyes, “I-” you started to sputter.
“Hey,” She reassures you, “Your secret is safe with me”, mockingly zipping her lips and throwing away the key.
“Besides,” she adds, “You’re not alone. You’re just like me- just like all of them”.
You give her a grateful smile as the two beers slid towards you. Both of you take a sip as you enjoyed each other's space quietly, Jess breaks the silence a few minutes later: “Am I the first one to figure it out?”
“I hope s-” you stop, “Wait, what do you mean figure it out? Was it obvious?”
Seeing your nervous expression, she lightly chuckles before adding: “Not really, just the many times I’ve caught you staring or how you react when I’m near you” she finishes, bumping your shoulder jokingly.
“I’m so sorry, it’s just that being away from home, it felt like a lot of things suddenly clicked”
“Don’t be sorry. Besides, I enjoyed it”, Jess teased you as she hopped off the seat and nodded towards an empty table.
You follow her lead, pulling out the wooden chair and sitting down. Jess lit a cigarette as you guys would spend the next hour talking, laughing, and enjoying each other's presence; a haven away from the strict rules that run society outside. As The night begins to slow down, people filtering out of the warmly-lit room, Jess stands from her chair, putting out the cigarette before holding her hand out to you, helping you stand up. 
“You ready to head out?”
“Yeah,” you mutter as you stare at each other, soft smiles gracing each face.
And yet as you weaved through the smaller crowd, never once did she let go, only moving to rest her arm around your shoulders once you stepped outside into the cool Chicagoan night breeze. Your feet fell into a similar pattern as you felt her warmth encase you like a warm blanket. Butterflies filled your stomach as you felt her grip tightening and loosen up on you periodically. 
As the house came into sight, you feel yourself deflate, not wanting to end the night. And as she led you up the stairs, she stopped in front of the door, turning to face you. She looks down as she grabs your other hand and looks back up to meet your eyes.
“I had a lot of fun tonight and I’m glad I got to finally meet the real you”
“Maybe we could do it again sometime?” you hopefully add.
Jess replies with a sweet kiss to your cheek, smirking as she sees your expression, “I’d love to”, turning back around to walk through the door;
You smile to yourself before following her, watching as she walks up the steps before disappearing into her and Greta’s shared room. You slowly make your way back to your room before slipping out of your dress and back into your pajamas and falling into your bed, passing out with dreams replaying the night over and over again; Jess’s plaited hair and the cigarette behind her ear seared in your brain till the morning and for many nights to come.
Maybe your dreams weren't impossible after all.
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janesgms · 7 months
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Asteroid Industria
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✨️ Industria (389) Persona Chart Edition ✨️
Having a 5th house stellium can indicate that you will work in the creative field or with children in general, it can also indicate that your own children will interfere in your career like bringing your children with you to your job (and this can cause problems to you depending on the planets we're talking about).
career examples: being a teacher, a pediatrician, a performer, an artist
Sun conjunct mercury indicates your job has a lot to do with communicating yourself/speaking in general, your job is a lot about languages or just communicating in general.
career examples: being a teacher (again), a singer, a mailman, etc. it reminds me of hermes in greek mythology
Having a 2nd house stellium is a huge indicator of having a job that brings you financial comfort and gains in general, you're probably the "official" supporter of the house financially.
Virgo stellium in this chart shows someone bery hardworker, to the point where it's even obsessive depending on the planets and aspects, people can even take advantage of you because you have no problem with doing the "dirty work".
7th house moon is an indicator you have a soft heart in your job space and a lot of peoole with bad intentions take advantage of your kindness, you need to set your boundaries, seriously.
3rd house venus = gossips about your love life in your job space?? 👀 just a guess
Neptune square moon can indicate that you're very uncertain or lost when it comes to choosing what your heart wants for a profession, you feel like there isn't a dream job for you and you'll just get on with life lol. I think this also applies specially if you have pisces personal placements or a stellium in this chart.
On the other side, and kind of surprisingly, moon conjunct neptune can indicate that you've always dreamt about a certain job and it fits you like a glove.
Mars in the 8th house can mean you like to work alone, secretly, you don't like to be ordered around much and you hate when people invade your privacy in your work space.
Having a libra venus in this chart can indicate your beauty and charm have a huge impact on your job.
celebrity example: Taehyung from BTS
Having a libra midheaven can mean your aesthetic has a huge impact on others, you can influenciate a lot of people from your profession.
celebrity example: Lana Del Rey
I think Taurus stellium is a huge indicator of talent and a gorgeous aura in general that makes people pulled in by you in your job space. You'll probably work in the comestics/fashion area (sometimes people forget that venus also rules taurus but let's give them some credits too here lmao)
Mercury in the 5th house: you communicate yourself so pretty, so beautifully in your job, your words and/or voice let people in awe, this has a siren effect but not necessarily a singing voice. Your words can be hypnotizing and your diction too
7th house venus or stellium can indicate your romantic life impacts on your job immensely, even negatively if you're not careful. Also, it can mean you'll find your significant others in your profession field.
Pluto sextile sun means you impose yourself beautifully in your profession, you have an impact on others in a gracious but unforgettable way.
1st house moon can mean you pour your heart out when you're really trying hard to leave an impression through your job. This can also means you care a lot about how others perceive your appearance and this affects you really personally
5th house venus is so pretty, I wish I had it in my chart lol, this person really knows how to use her creativity to make her job properly, she has a natural talent for what she does.
Having a combo of positive aspects between the moon/venus/asc in this chart can indicate your femininity is very in tune in your profession field, you can come off as really beautiful and "in form"/put together when you're working, you just know how to have the ideal vibes, you know? This is very beautiful.
1° Sun means you can show your ego pretty easily when you're in your job space, unless neptune is aspecting it or it's in pisces, then you can hide it pretty well, but you still can be very certain about your abilities and even your appearance, this can indicate a natural leader.
A Leo or Aquarius MC is the true trendsetter of their professional field, they have the best ideas and they're always ahead of others, they can be really inovative. Leo can do it in a more traditional way that still works and leave an impact, in a big and colorful way, aquarius make it in a standing way that leaves people shocked with their ideas, they do that crazy thought that others are scared. The Leo MC knows that they're the royalty and the Aquarius MC knows that they're the mastermind. This duo can work greatly together, their ideas mix pretty well.
1st house Mars in aries are such fast workers!! they do their job pretty fast
I've talked about virgo stellium, but Capricorn stellium are the TRUE workaholics and they do the hard job without an ounce of laziness, they're down for anything as long as it makes them satisfied with fulfilling a useful meaning to them and with ✨️money✨️ of course lol
Speaking of capricorn, having a Capricorn MC means you have fame of doing your job impeccably, you're not joking in your area lol.
If aries/1st house placements are fast workers, taurus/2nd house placements are the opposite. They appreciate the details very much and they hate doing a job for the "half", they can be slow workers but their talent makes it worth it.
8th house pluto and/or mars can indicate you're pretty envied in your job space 🤫 be careful with gossips, lies and secrets...
Scorpio moons do not put their souls in their jobs, their jobs ARE their souls, they pour everything in their profession. They turn their traumas in art
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r3starttt · 5 months
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Streamer gf! Ellie
M.list
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Im obsessed sorry
Streamer gf! Ellie whose wall is almost filled with guitars even though she only plays with one specific and does it just for you.
“Y’all wanna see the guitars? I only use that one actually” she moved her chair to show it properly, pointing her index finger at one that was lying on the floor
“Want me to play? I haven’t done it in a while”
Streamer gf! Ellie who remembered everyone that she had a girlfriend once she went super viral (and got made fun of bcs there was no way she could even approach to any girl without getting nervous and it seemed)
Streamer gf! Ellie who made you appear on stream with her after that just to prove you were in fact real and dating her.
“For today’s stream I’m gonna show y’all my wife, be nice, but not too much” she grabbed you by the wrist, bringing you closer to the camera and only showing you from your nose down.
“I told y’all to not be so nice, why’re you even calling her mommy? What’s wrong with you people”
Streamer gf! Ellie who got insisted on doing more streams with you so she started to play with you on stream (ofcs your favorite games most times) and bringing you with her anytime she played any horror game.
Streamer gf! Ellie who started to play Minecraft with you once a week on stream (having more views those days too) because people loved the dynamic you two had for that one game specifically.
Streamer gf! Ellie who ended up showing your face by accident while trying to adjust the camera and panicked once her chat told her because she thought you’ll get mad or something
“What do you mean? No I did not-“ she started to open like ten different tabs on her computers, checking something desperately and trying to push you so you wouldn’t see the screens “what? What happened?” you asked, confused.
Ellie was panicking but the chat didn’t seem to take it so seriously so you laughed at her too, still fully confused and trying to understand whatever the screens showed. That until you saw you face on a clip “Did you just show my face?”
Her eyes shifted to you, not saying a word “El, did you? Really?” once she heard you laughing it was like the sudden tension on her body disappeared almost immediately, letting out a small laugh as well “Well everyone, meet the wifey” your hand slapped her arm, not to hard but with how dramatic she is; she pulled away from you ‘oww’
Streamer gf! Ellie who tried to make a vlog and failed because she doesn’t know how to hold the camera properly (you ended recording everything for her)
Streamer gf! Ellie who social media is full of shit posting, kitties and you (likes every edit her fans make about you)
Streamer gf! Ellie who once did a bet with you during stream and ended up getting long nails because she lost almost immediately
Streamer gf! Ellie who wears lots of “I love my girlfriend” shirts on stream
Streamer gf! Ellie who spoils you a lot and likes having small dates with you, like building legos together, doing movie marathons or going shopping. Just anything where she can spend her money on you and have a nice time together.
“Babe, wake up” you were covered in blankets, hugging a pillow and trying to cover yourself from the warm but very bright rays of sun that entered trough the open spaces in between the contains. Groaning the moment Ellie started to pat your back because that meant she was either hungry or bored and needed you up too.
“El, let me sleep… cuddle with me, Mhm?” the way she chuckled made you turn around, trying your best to open your eyes properly “I have a surprise for you” her sleepy voice elicited a smile on you “yeah?”
She got under the blankets, crawling to you until she was practically on top of you “yeah, and I don’t wanna be late” her lips pressed on your forehead, hands on your face making small circles around your cheeks with her thumbs
Streamer gf! Ellie who insists on you making your own YouTube channel or something like that because people love you a lot and you would be a very talented influencer
Streamer gf! Ellie who got excited when you first opened an account somewhere to interact more with the fans and did lots of spam about it
Streamer gf! Ellie who begged you to get a cat. She wanted the orange + black combo originally but ended up getting a gray kitty she found on the street (and it’s obsessed with it, it’s her baby) She named it either a stupid name or something game related
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Streamer gf! Ellie who apologizes a lot for having to go on stream during the weekends or when you’re free and feels bad for not being able to spend more time with you
Streamer gf! Ellie who always goes to cuddle with you and the cat after every stream and asks you to tell her everything about your day
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l4long-winded · 5 months
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o.s. the phone call regarding the onions
summary: richie won't stop calling and despite how busy carmen is, he picks up the phone. he didn't know richie would take so long to tell him about his trip to the farmer's market, let alone how impatient you would be in his lap (carmen berzatto x afab!reader)
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reflection: i wrote this last night and edited it this afternoon. i find i have a hard time writing dialogue because i always want it to flow with my other descriptions. it's tricky for me, so this was an interesting challenge for myself. indulgent? yes. but intriguing nonetheless. as always, enjoy, and feedback is always appreciated!
warnings: cursing, kissing, phone call during sex, riding, religious allusions, more cursing, pussydrunk!carmen (the best kind), longwinded descriptions, slander of the elderly, cynicism, filth, secret girlfriend!reader, humorous dialogue, richie being richie, set before or during season 1 ig, double entendre ending, very slight dirty talk, overuse of the word "cousin" (please let me know if there are other warnings i need to add)
word count: 2,101
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“Are you even listening to me, Cousin?” Richie’s voice irritates Carmen’s eardrum drastically more than it usually does, and that’s saying something considering how his tone and words always sift right under the flesh of Carmen’s forearms to scrape against his bones. He should really tell Richie to shut the fuck up, to get to the godforsaken point of this overdrawn story about his trip to the grocers, but Carmen can’t find the speech in him to do so. As a defensive and sharp individual, Carmen seldom runs into the issue of not being able to come back with a witty remark of his own speckled in a seasoning of honesty, but his brain’s already having difficulty concentrating on his shallow breathing. If he loses focus on that particular aspect, he would never hear the end of it. Richie’s too much of a pain in the ass to hang up on, in fact, he’s part of the reason Carmen’s in this predicament.
Richie just had to keep on calling over and over and over and over again. Carmen’s phone buzzed and buzzed and buzzed and the motherfucker on the other end would not take the fucking hint. Carmen recalls catching the flustered, frustrated, and deprived expression on your features as you looked at him, disappointment in your blown pupils because you knew you had to climb off his lap in the middle of your shared fun. Carmen assured you that it wouldn’t take long, to remain where you were because he couldn’t bear to depart from your heat for a single second in this state of mind, the state of nothingness possessed by desire. He’s confronted that compelling phenomenon too often with you and it’s absolutely everything for him. Richie’s call, Carmen surmised and explained to you during the fifth ring, would only take three minutes, five at the most.
Carmen forgets how bad at math he is until it smacks him upside the face and attempts to ruin his day. Richie’s been yapping on the line for about… how long has it been? Carmen stares up at the ceiling, phone pressed to his ear, pink lips parting as your tongue and teeth glissade down his neck. He can feel his body’s primal need to roll his eyes far into the back of his head, but he somehow sustains his half lidded gaze so he can raise his phone away from his ear to check the call’s duration.
14:53. 14:54. 14:55.
Seriously? Fifteen minutes of this bullshit? Carmen’s close to tossing his phone across the room so he can fuck you properly against his bedroom door, but he knows Richie. Richie would bolt on over here to tell Carmen his story in person, stomp away on Carmen’s remnants of alone time with you before he’s back to busting his ass in the kitchen. Carmen can’t have that. A fucking crowbar couldn’t pry you off his cock, and he’s sighing out shakily, pushing the mic away from his mouth far off to the side of the couch and into the cushion so he can release the tendril of fucked out noise you’re igniting in his stomach. Its smoke is climbing up and up, swirling around his lungs, collapsing into purrs and grunts of pleasure since he can’t be any louder than that. You haven’t made his mistake easy on him, fluttering your walls around him, arching as you rise and fall, adding in your lips and dutiful tongue into the sum of his impending eruption. He notices the twinkle atop the slim rings of your irises, how in awe and turned on you are from hearing those little noises he can’t will himself to wrangle down.
Do you like that?
He mouths.
Yes,
you nod your head.
For a moment, resolve slips. Carmen’s other hand maneuvers from gripping the throw pillow on his couch to gripping your thigh, sliding slightly down where he sits so he can roll his hips up into you. He revels in the gasp you inhale, your hands steadying yourself by the use of his shoulders. A ghost of a smile forms on his lips catching your pout and he’s about to inform you to behave when his phone speaks from under the cushion, still in Carmen’s other hand as he was trying to metaphorically and literally smother Richie, but the bastard’s gumption defeats Carmen’s efforts. He tightens his top and bottom lip together as he snatches the phone in agitation from under the cushion to lift it back to his ear.
“Carmy? Carmy? I’m fucking talking to you, Carmy,” Richie grits out, the bass in his voice scratching an unpleasant portion of Carmen’s ear. Carmen shuts his eyes, instructing himself soundlessly to breathe in through his nose and out through his mouth… the same mouth you kiss, your hands cupping his cheeks, tongue shyly petting his. He should put a stop to it. He’s powerless when you kiss him, it’s why he avoided doing so this entire phone call with Richie. He knew he couldn’t stop you, the hand once at your thigh palming up to your ass, his middle finger slipping under the fabric of your lacy panties that you still had on. It rests there, like it’s part of the ensemble (or lack of), twitching and clutching as the lace hugs him and tethers his digit to you.
“Hey, bozo, are you going to answer me or not?” Richie snarls, and Carmen almost tells him to fuck off, but you’re the one who takes mercy on him. Your mouth slides back down, lapping over a sensitive vein in his neck. Carmen finds himself falling back into the couch, licking his dry lips, a desire in him present to curse his friend out.
“I hear you, Richie, I fucking hear you,” Carmen blurts suddenly. He’s got a breathy rasp to him due to the sex, crimson in the face, yelling almost in the same fashion he does at work. You hide your amused grin under your hair as you tenderly kiss his jaw, picking up the speed of your hips. Before, your movements were gentle and small. But now, you have intention as you fuck yourself on Carmen’s cock, sucking spots on his skin to conceal your moans away. The worst part is that even though Carmen can barely hear them, he can feel the hum of each one vibrating against his flesh. And it feels like he knows you sound. How does someone begin to describe that? The walls of a cathedral must know exactly what he’s experiencing, angelic hums reverberating through their surfaces, etching sound waves into crevices and making them whole. That’s it. He feels whole. Complete. It’s almost as good as when he swallows those moans into his mouth and feels them alive in his throat.
“Yeah? Yeah? Then what the fuck did I say, huh?”
Shit… yeah, what the fuck did he say? Carmen’s horrid at multitasking outside his craft and he’s especially inept at maintaining his control and composure when he’s watching his secret girlfriend impale herself repeatedly on his throbbing length. He closes his eyes again to subtract sight’s distraction, middle finger sweeping back and forth so that your lace can rub his knuckle and jog along his memory. Oddly enough, it helps him collect the thoughts you’re so keen on dissipating with those gorgeous, enticing hips of yours.
“You said… you went to the farmer’s market,” Carmen begins, gulping heavily as you clench. “You went to… uh,” Carmen tilts his phone away from his mouth, biting hard on his index finger to refrain from hissing out. He glares at you, you’re being unfair, and the mischief is written all over your gaze despite the innocent smile you attempt to give him. He’s definitely going to pay this back. He’s not a saint, he holds grudges, and he’s harboring one against you for almost causing him to moan into his phone.
“Carmy,” Richie disrupts Carmen’s plans for vengeance and fortunately, Carmen instantly recalls what they were talking about like an epiphany, no thanks to you.
“You went to pick up the onions!” Carmen rushes, his syllables spilling over one another. He hates how he sounds. It’s different from his regular speaking voice and if they weren’t dealing with shitty cell service, Richie probably would’ve noticed.
“Then, what? I’ve been talking for almost twenty minutes,” oh, Carmen fucking knows, “and that’s all you’ve gotten from that?”
“Richie,” Carmen says as sternly as he can as your tightness sinks to his base. He sucks onto his upper row of teeth, pulsing increasing, lighting up with heat inside of your delectable walls. This is your fault, too. You and your enveloping warmth. You and your pretty face and your pretty cunt and your persistent needs, your pliant open legs as you ride him and make him drunk without a smidgen of alcohol around. He might as well have bathed himself in scotch, the effects most likely easier to handle than the vise you’ve got on his mind, body, and cock. “Did you, or did you not get the fucking onions?”
Richie scoffs, “Ugggghhhhhhh,” into Carmen’s ear. Annoyed by it, Carmen grips his phone tighter as he pushes it away from his head for as long as Richie does it. He shakes his hair out of his eyes as he retracts the phone back to its original position, his stare greedily finding where his cock disappears and reappears with more and more of that wonderful slick that glides him in deeper and deeper. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you! The fucking old broad from the lot gave me that dirty ass look as she took all of the product right in front of me. What the fuck is some old chick with a bad hip going to do with sixteen onions, Carmy? She had her stumbling grandson with his little toddler hands dropping the motherfuckers on the floor right in front of me because he couldn’t carry them all. Like, are you kidding me? Are you cooking French Onion soup for the whole neighborhood? For the next winter?”
“Richie,” Carmen grinds out as you grind down on him. His teeth clatter as he scrapes them together. “Richie… Richie…” He can’t gain Richie’s attention back as he rants in Carmen’s ear, as you swivel your hips and whine at the stretch. Carmen’s holding himself back, painfully hard from the experience you’re condoning.
“Next time I see her, it’s on. Watch what fucking soup she can make when I buy the whole stock and flip her the bird,” Richie continues, the sound of a trunk being harshly slammed on the other end. But Carmen’s had enough. He can’t take it anymore. He feels feral, he’s going to burst any second and he refuses to do so with Richie still on the line.
“Cousin, Cousin, Cousin, Cousin,” Carmen parrots, rolling his eyes as he increases his volume with each repetition.
On the other side, Richie talks over him. “She’s driving some ugly ass Pontiac, no wonder she’s bitter.”
“Cousin, Cousin, listen to me.”
“Do you think they’ll notice me if I take a stab at one of her tires?”
“Richie!”
“Nah, you’re right, it looks like there’s a bunch of fucking narcs around here.”
“Motherfucker, stop talking,” Carmen spits and that’s when Richie shouts back, his own irritation building because that entire time, he could hear Carmen babbling on and on. Apparently no one knows how to listen to a fucking story anymore.
“What? What, Carmy?” Richie responds with a yell. He must be inside of his car because Carmen heard a crash right after. Carmen pinches the bridge of his nose having finally snaked his other hand away from your underwear.
“So, you’re telling me… you don’t have the onions?” Carmen asks.
Richie sighs. The reason he felt the need to orate what happened is because of Carmen’s temper regarding the restaurant. He had one task today and he failed it because of some greedy elderly woman. Though, he understands how Carmen’s busy. Through this phone call, Richie hasn’t been able to hold his Cousin’s focus for very long. He doesn’t think there was any interval longer than three minutes where he had it all to himself.
“No, I… I don’t ha—”
The line goes dead. Richie looks down at his phone, fully tempted to call Carmen one more time to explain himself and make his stubborn, mule-headed friend see his point of view for once. He only doesn’t because he swears Carmen sounded like he was about to explode.
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kyleemm2 · 4 days
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Art Supplies I'd Give to JJK Characters [Protagonist Edition]
My credentials: I make art and I can do what I want.
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Yuji Itadori: mechanical pencil- easy to use, easy to manage, forgiving, but he always forgets to bring extra lead and erasers. He'd draw cutesy things and anime characters.
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Megumi Fushiguro: charcoal pencils- intense and moody, somewhat forgiving, but you reach the end result faster, less rendering required in comparison to pencil, and much more artistic and professional-looking end piece. He'd make abstract pieces that no one understands but he doesn't care that no one understands.
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Choso Kamo: acrylic markers- not always easy to get the hang of, but once you do, you’ll create pieces that are rich in color and texture. I feel like he'd like the big chunky Krink markers. You'd KNOW he'd draw stylized portraits of his brothers!
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Nobara Kugisaki: gouache paint- trendy, fun, easy to use, always reliable. Despite their popularity, they're still a viable medium! I feel like she'd paint a lot of Studio Ghibli screenshots.
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Satoru Gojo: sumi ink- a classic medium that is always fun to use that yields a classy, minimalistic look. He'd definitely draw Digimon characters in classic Japanese style.
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Suguru Geto: willow charcoal- soft and also minimalist, easy to use but can get a little messy when not handled properly. He'd make a lot of soft landscapes and simple still lifes.
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Maki Zenin: ink pens- can’t go wrong with ink pens, they’re versatile and deliver beautiful results when used properly. She'd probably draw portraits.
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Toge Inumaki: spray paint- unassuming at first, but when in use, they cannot be ignored! He'd do pop art and graffiti-styled works.
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Panda: finger paints- do this really need an explanation? Fun, easy to use, and can pack a punch when taken seriously. He'd make self-insert drawings, no matter what the project would be.
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Yuta Okkotsu: collage art- when done right, collages can evoke intense visual appeal while also reducing waste. Given that his CT is mimicry, using pieces already produced seems fitting. He'd make abstract stuff that tells a story or expresses his feelings.
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Utahime Iori: oil paint- arguably the classiest fine art medium around, requires patience and technique but yields the richest and more alluring end results. Landscapes, portraits, anything beautiful.
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Shoko Ieri: photography- why make something out of art supplies when you can capture the beauty of the world in real time? It’s always good to snap a memorable photo before it’s too late. She'd photograph her friends and herself and anything she finds interesting.
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Kento Nanami: dry pastels- while they tend to require some skill to produce quality pieces, the technique is worth it. And if you’re a fellow pastel fiend, you know how pricey Sennelier is. Nanami uses the high-quality shit. He'd do still life art of things in his home for the sake of convenience, but he'd probably want to do seascapes if he ever made it to Malaysia :c
lmk if u agree or disagree. i have an antagonist edition coming as well
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Fighters should have magic
I mean this shit 100% seriously BTW.
An impassioned rant about Fighters' place in modern campaigns.
There is certainly an argument to be made for sometimes not giving Fighters access to magic! In a low magic setting like Dark Sun (yes, I know the magic situation in that setting is more complicated than that), it makes perfect sense that Fighters wouldn't go anywhere near the stuff! In some of the more old school low fantasy focused DnD editions, or some OSR systems, it makes sense that magic would require years of practice for even the most basic of spells, and so Fighters wouldn't bother with it.
That is not, however, the bulk of modern campaigns. Be it DnD, or Pathfinder, or so many other fantasy heartbreakers out there nowadays, most campaigns are fantastical, filled with wonderous magic and queer tieflings and rogues who literally cloak themselves in shadows and jumping between planes to save the world and so much more!
In these campaigns, Fighters should know magic!
If your setting is even close to treating magic as commonplace, where having a level 1 wizard under the age of a billion fucking years old is considered within the realm of feasibility, than EVERYONE should have access to magic!
Any adventurer in such a setting who decided to start a life of wilderness exploration, and DIDN'T learn the spell Prestidigitation, is nothing short of monster bait. "Oh yes this spell that starts campfires and cleans my clothes and seasons my food and is THE MOST BASIC SPELL IN EXISTENCE certainly isn't worth my time!" - The words of someone about to get eaten by a coyote on their first night. Not even a fun magical creature, just a regular ass coyote because they are THAT unprepared. Even if it wasn't a cantrip and required 5 minutes of focus to cast, every adventurer should know this spell by heart.
But obviously, that isn't unique to just Fighters.
Fighters are focused on being masters of weaponry! They study the blade, learn it inside and out! They don't have time for magic... right?
No. They don't have time to learn SPELLS. That you could absolutely make an argument for. A fighter doesn't have to learn to shoot a fireball, because that's not how they fight. Not knowing magic that augments their fighting style, in a setting where magic is commonplace, is equivalent to that fighter going "Oh I'm too busy to learn to fight with weapons. I dont have time to learn to sharpen one properly." THAT IS ASININE. WHAT REASON DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE FOR IGNORING A SKILL DIRECTLY LINKED TO THEIR CHOSEN PROFESSION? Spells like True Strike are things a fighter would learn! But even if not spells, magical augmentation to their skill are something a Fighter would absolutely embrace! Anything that helps them further the effectiveness of their weapons should be fair game for their practice. Even if it worked like Paladins or Rangers where you typically just don't get the spells until higher levels.
And the games already reflect this! What do Fighters need to maintain damage pacing and ability as they grow stronger? That's right. Magic. In the form of Magic Weapons and Armor.
Magic armaments are considered commonplace in these settings, being handed out like candy. They are an expected part of character progression, and the games are balanced around the expectation that a fighter will be using them. So why, then, is the master of weapons and all they embody completely ignorant on the front of magical weapons?
Sure, a fighter might not be able to craft magic weapons. Not every fighter has to be a blacksmith. But much like how it should be expected that a fighter should be able to at least MAINTAIN their weapons, a fighter should absolutely be trained in the kinds of magic that are APPLIED to weapons. A fighter should be able to take a single glance at a weapon in a chest, and turn to the party and go "Hey this thing is cursed as fuck, don't touch it."
In worlds that are so fantastical and magical, it does not make sense to have a guy who's whole deal is knowing how to fight, and have him completely ignore A MASSIVE segment of fighting styles they will be going up against.
If your setting is magical, then your Fighters should be magical too, damnit!
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asonorouslullaby · 8 months
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Breeding Experiment
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Yandere - Gojo Satoru x CursedKitty! Reader x Geto Suguru
A/N - Another part of CursedKitty universe! After a few very late nights and some glasses of wine I present to you a NSFW oneshot drabble thing where they fuck and want to breed Kitty :) I warn you this is my first time trying to seriously write some smut let alone a breeding kink so i apologise profusely in advance if this sucks, do let me know how it is <3 (and thank you to the lovely person to suggest breeding link <3) If you want to send in your own ideas for Kitty, my inbox is open! <3
summary - Gojo and Geto found out they can fuck you, can they breed you?
warnings - Dubcon/Noncon-ish? Kitty is having a pretty good time but they didnt ask for consent and she doesn’t really understand, female anatomy, they call Reader 'Kitty' and 'Experiment' a few times, cum, eating Kitty out, smut, breeding kink, vague Yandere vibes, they’re a little mean, (let me know if i need to add more please)
genre - Oneshot Drabble thing
wc - 1.3K
Edit - spelling and grammar fixed 09/10/23
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Gojo was leaning back against his headboard, a few pillows stuffed underneath him. His legs were spread in front of him, knees bent so he could dig his feet into the mattress below him. Kitty was in his lap, her back resting against his hard chest. Her little tail was wound tight around her waist to keep it from getting crushed between the two of them.
The only thing she was wearing was a long and clean shirt, given to her by Satoru. She wasn’t wearing any underwear as him and Suguru deemed it unnecessary. She was for their eyes only so it didn't matter too much to them, and Kitty didn't seem to mind either. She looked similar to how the two of them first found her, but now she was cleaned, properly scrubbed and groomed to their satisfaction. 
Her Kitty ears were pressed flat against her hair as she pressed against Gojo. Each leg of hers had been hoisted up and over Gojos, keeping them hooked back and her pussy exposed. 
‘She’s such a dumb little thing.’ Gojo thought to himself. There she was, squirming against him, trying to close her legs. Not even thinking of just lifting her legs up so she could close them. No matter, it made his job so much easier of keeping her upper half restrained. 
He had wrapped his hands around her wrists and kept them tucked against her own chest. ‘And what a tease too.’ All of Kittys squirming had riled him up, getting him hot and bothered the longer she unintentionally grinded her ass against his hard cock. 
Suguru on the other hand had been between her legs for just over twenty minutes now. Eating her out like it was his last meal while she mewled, gasped and cried against Gojo. 
If Gojo was being completely honest, he didn't expect him and Suguru to take it this far. But they couldn't help their naturally curious nature.
Especially after the first bath they had been forced to give her. The both of them had quickly figured out just how little she knew, or understood for that matter. Rendering her useless to do most things by herself when she didn't understand them. 
Anyway, it was only natural for their eyes to wander, allowing themselves to take in the full image of her nude self. 
It shocked them a little to see just how much she resembled a human girl. She was equipped with full anatomy (atleast to their eyes on the outside), except the ears and tail of course. So it was only natural, the curious human nature of them, to think about whether… well… whether she worked or not. 
It had been around two weeks since then and in Gojos opinion he would say the two of them had held out pretty well, given his inability to be patient most times. But alas, here they were now.
Suguru groaned from where he was slurping Kitty’s juices from between her legs. “From all the curses I’ve had to swallow, she has to be the sweetest.”
Gojo gave a huff in response, a tad salty that he didn't get to go first, but it's whatever. The view he had been blessed with almost made up for it anyway. 
And of course poor Kitty seemed overwhelmed already, her chest heaving, body hot and sweaty, her ears flattened and twitching against her head and eyes half lidded. Her pouty mouth open, gasping and mewling incoherent noises at the pleasure Sugurus tongue was forcing her to experience for the first time. 
Every flick against the sensitive little nub causes her hips to jerk, mewling even louder. Every wiggle of his tongue inside her caused her to squirm even harder against Gojo as she cried out. 
“Poor thing,” Gojo murmurs, “I doubt she even understands what we're doing to her. Atleast shes enjoying it.” 
Suguru finally pulls his face away from her pussy, rising up to kneel on his legs from between hers. His mouth and chin were covered in Kittys juices. He starts pulling off his clothing, using his shirt to wipe around his mouth. 
As he was pulling off his last article of clothing, Kitty was starting to squirm again. Making little noises and whines that neither of the two really understood, not quite understanding why the stimulation had all of a sudden stopped. 
They had quickly figured out that she couldn't communicate with them in any language. Tugging at their shirts and whining at them to indicate she needed something. Although they had learned that she could understand them, to a certain extent. 
Gojo hushed her and leaned down to press gentle kisses against her exposed neck. “Shh.. Calm down Kitty. Suguru is going to take real good care of you now.” She seemed to calm a little at that. 
Suguru leaned forward, now on his knees between them. With Kittys forcibly spread legs, courtesy of Gojo, on either side of him it allowed him to place his hands on the flesh of her thighs. The tip of his throbbing cock now poking and teasing at her little hole. 
“Should be nice and easy, Kitty. Nice and wet, such a good girl for us, huh?” Suguru said, beginning to push his way into her tight hole, loosened up a little from his tongue. Kitty’s walls fluttered and pulsed around him while he bowed his head and groaned. 
“God, for a curse this pussy is tight. Warm too.” He muttered as he inched himself further into her heat. 
“Bet she could take both of us. Such a dirty little kitty we have on our hands, enjoying Sugurus cock so much, aren't you?” Gojo teased as she mewled and moaned and pawed at them. Her head was tilted back and resting against his shoulder, a small dribble of drool escaping down the side of her mouth. He couldn't blame her, after all, she had bigger priorities to worry about right now. 
“Could fill this pussy up so well. Breed her like the bitch she is.” Suguru groaned, furrowing his brows as he began pumping in and out of her tight walls. 
“You think we could breed her?” Gojo perked up a little in interest. The thought was certainly entertaining given the throbbing in his pants. 
“If we stuff her full enough, probably.” He grunted in response. Beginning to thrust his hips into Kittys even harder. Wet, slapping sounds filled the room they were in, almost louder than the little curse situated in Gojos arms. 
She began to pant and whine, droplets of tears gathering in the corners of her eyes as she squinted, her tongue poking out from between her lips. They both could take a good guess as to what was about to happen. 
Suguru began to fuck into her even harder while Gojo reached down with one hand, the other keeping a hold of her wrists, to flick and rub and pinch at her little clit poking out from all the pleasure.
Kitty screeched and cried as her ears trembled and her tail shuddered from where it was wrapped tightly around her. Her orgasm overwhelmed her, causing her pussy to tighten and gush with even more juices. Making the sounds from between them sound even wetter.
Suguru threw his head back, groaning as he emptied his load deep inside her as Gojo leaned down to whisper into her ear.
“We're going to breed you, you’d want that right? Have your tummy round and full with our child, all for you to look after. Stuffed full with our cum, our perfect little experiment, huh?” His fingers are still rubbing and circling the throbbing nub, making her cry and tremble and squirt more of her juices.
He only stopped when Suguru had recovered and began pulling himself out of Kitty’s fluttering walls. Both pausing to stare at the way his cum oozed out from her little pussy.
Kitty’s eyes fluttered while her ears relaxed against her hair, closing her eyes in bliss and seemingly exhausted. 
Suguru and Gojo looked up at each other after a moment of silence between them and what had just occurred before he spoke up.
“Come on Kitty, my turn.”
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p1nk-matter · 2 months
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✧ yan!gojo who stumbles upon you on the subway
✧ yan!gojo who excuses himself and offers to help you, his body crashed with impact as you got off and you fell on your wrists / wasn’t something major after all
✧ yan!gojo who gets you home and cooks for you, you can’t use your hand properly so he wants to make up for his clumsiness
✧ yan!gojo who kisses you goodbye, not wanting to break off the kiss. you don’t either, hence he’s pulled inside and you straddle his lap with meaning
✧ yan!gojo who learns the way your body functions, always aiming to please, experimenting with his fingers inside you and studying your expressions
✧ yan!gojo who's still submissive to all your sexual needs; he’s super sensitive and groans with just a simple touch on his waistband, cock pulsating through his boxers as you rub and giggle
✧ yan!gojo who sees light in your eyes, you are the first person he thinks of when he wakes up; a vicious cycle really because it’s not like he doesn’t see you when asleep, you're part of his subconscious mind
✧ yan!gojo who suggests something serious between you two, you nod and he smiles, he’s fully yours now
✧ yan!gojo who texts your friends from your phone then deletes all messages, you notice they rarely hit you up but presume they’re busy at first
✧ yan!gojo who knows most people use VPN to protect themselves but he just uses it to talk to you and stalk you unbothered, wanting to test your loyalty (and check your whereabouts!)
✧ yan!gojo who goes through your chats with a coworker, he told you your hair looks nice and gojo can’t think straight. he goes missing a couple days later, your boss saying he’s suspended for investigation but no one hears from him after
✧ yan!gojo who of course never really stumbled in the first place, he’d been following you for about a year once he spotted you walking carelessly back home (seriously how could you not look after yourself more? it was dangerous out there)
✧ yan!gojo who laughs and presents himself as this playful guy but really, people just don't give him enough credit, he thinks
edit: wrote a full fic on this
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ms-demeanor · 8 months
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the most minorly annoying thing about this photo class is that the professor required us to put our first and last names in the metadata and i'm too lazy to figure out how to strip that out in lightroom so i need to go through and edit all the good shit properly before I can share the high res versions.
Also hello i learned to take photos in a journalism context and I am old man yells at cloud about lightroom. Clarity? DEHAZE? AI SELECTING THE SKY?
Back in my day we didn't have smart masks we had to do a magnetic lasso with a 10px feather and it always covered the wrong shit at least part of the time and that's why you take snapshots to correct after the fact and now you've just got a robot to tell you where the sky is? What's the world coming to!? (But actually seriously for real, "select the sky" is a great example of how machine image recognition trained on large public facing image sets is/can be a really useful tool for artists and is not just a fucking plagiarism machine and ALSO a good example of the democratization that people love to deride when talking about AI "everybody already could draw, AI isn't doing anything special" - yeah, well everybody could also spend an hour meticulously clicking around the edge of the subject to remove the background but it was a pain in the ass wasn't it? are you telling me you don't want a mask that you can use to fill with content aware hatching? Are you telling me you don't want a stippling brush that will correct distribution when multiple passes are applied?)
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balioc · 11 months
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Thoughts on the Barbie Movie
Hoo boy. Here we go.
This is long. Spoilers abound.
I
The movie is not, in any normal sense, a Barbie movie (like this or this or this or whatever). It is not a story of Barbie doing the kinds of things that Barbie does in stories. It is an endlessly postmodern and self-referential movie about Barbie, which is to say, about the Barbie franchise and its role in culture. Which is, at least plausibly, an interesting thing for a movie to be.
You probably knew all that already. But it does give us a baseline of "this movie kind of had to be political and discourse-y, one way or another." Or even, to be more specific: "to some large extent this movie had to be about feminism, explicitly, if it was going to exist at all." How could you talk meaningfully about Barbie's role in culture without touching on that stuff?
II
The evaluative TLDR:
Barbie is very ambitious, and in many places very fun. It is also deeply confused, and fragmented, about what it's trying to say and do. Often it raises genuinely interested problems/scenarios and then totally fails to address them, or else addresses them in ways that are incoherent. The text knows that it's doing this, and on several occasions kind of apologizes for it; a couple of times it more or less looks into the camera and says "sorry, we're not going to deal with this properly;" but, well, that's not a substitute for dealing with things properly.
There is also a streak of genuine political nastiness running through the film, in a place where the story really cannot afford it. It...doesn't match up, tonally or thematically, with some of the surrounding material. I have no background at all in cinematic stratigraphy, but I would be fascinated to learn about Barbie's editorial history, because I have the vague sense that a more-cogent (and more-interesting) story got hacked apart and then Frankensteined together into something much cheaper and worse.
III
The opening sequence of the movie is wild. You've seen most of it -- or you can, if you haven't, and you want to -- because it is the film's first teaser trailer. Girls are playing listlessly with baby dolls; a giant Barbie appears like the monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey; and then the girls enter a frenzy of destruction, bashing their baby dolls' heads against the ground.
I don't know whether I would have found it as disturbing as I did, if I didn't actually have a baby of my own. But speaking from the standpoint of a parent...yeah, wow, it's more viscerally horrific than most actual horror I've seen recently. The narration says some stuff about Barbie providing a new and more rewarding set of imagination games to play, but the visuals by themselves tell a message loud and clear, which is: Barbie will turn your daughters into infanticidal maenads. It wouldn't need any editing at all to be part of a shock-you-silly Reefer-Madness-y moral panic film.
Which is really good! And really interesting! It starts us off on an undeniable thematic note: there is something primal and powerful and very dangerous about Barbie.
IV
The very best part of the movie is probably the part that comes right after the opening, when we explore the movie's depiction of "Barbieland" by going through Barbie's Typical Day, before we get into any of the notional plot or metaphysics. It's joyful and charming in a consistent way. The gags are (mostly) great. The movie is in love with its base premise, and that love is palpable.
This sequence makes one thing very clear:
Barbie treats Ken like absolute dogshit. She is a bad girlfriend.
And it's taken seriously. I mean, it's played for laughs, almost everything in this movie is played for laughs, but...it's not mean-spirited, not here. It's not, like, "ha ha, Ken, what a contemptible loser." He's Pierrot, asking for very basic forms of affection and attention and respect, and getting the door slammed in his face over and over. It's honestly kind of heartbreaking.
That colors everything that comes later.
The movie doesn't forget this, or fail to acknowledge it. At the end, after everything, Barbie does apologize to Ken for her treatment of him. It's a halfhearted and supremely unsatisfying kind of apology, especially in context, but...it's there, in so many words! I'm not making it up! This thematic foundation was laid down, not-very-subtly, right at the beginning!
V
This movie, which is at least trying to be ambitious, is juggling a million themes. Many of them are dumb at their core, and have no real promise; many of them lack any kind of narrative synergy with the others. But there are at least two which, I believe, (a) are genuinely worthwhile individually and (b) work well together in a story.
One is: What does it mean to be a symbol rather than a person? To exist, not for your own sake, but for the sake of influencing the dreams and culture of entities that you don't know and can't really understand?
The other is: What is the proper ordering of the relationship between Barbie and Ken?
I've seen a number of Takes in which people say, essentially: Couldn't this have ended with the Barbies and the Kens just being decent to each other and treating each other like humans? Couldn't there have been equality and mutual respect, instead of the weird uncomfortable girlboss-supremacist stuff that we got? And I sympathize with that impulse tremendously, but the honest answer has to be: No. We cannot have simple equality and esteem between Barbie and Ken, not in a movie like this. That would be a lie. Because this is a movie about Barbie-as-symbol, and when you're looking at Barbie through that lens, it is true and unavoidable that Ken is an appendage and an afterthought. You can have toys for boys; you can have dolls for boys (even if you call them "action figures" or whatever); for that matter, you can have dolls of boys for girls, so that girls can tell stories centering on male characters; but that's not what Ken is, and never has been. There are no Ken stories, and no one particularly wants them. Ken exists to be Barbie's boyfriend.
(One of the most painful moments of the movie comes during the resolution wrapup. Ken wails to Barbie that he has no identity outside her. She says, basically, "you have to find one, because I'm leaving you." And he...acts like he's had an epiphany, and does a little silly celebration. But his "insight" is just literally "I'm Ken," there's absolutely nothing there, and of course it's the most hollow and awful thing in the world because he really does have no identity outside her.)
VI
The movie's metaphysics are not even slightly consistent. The nature of Barbieland, and the ways that it affects and is affected by the real world, are completely different in every scene. In large part because the film can't ever pass up a gag, whether or not it's funny, no matter how much damage it does to the narrative and the theming overall.
The worst part is that the movie is not capable of saying anything remotely coherent about the real world, because its version of the "real world" is as weird and fake as its Barbieland. Will Ferrell's CEO of Mattel character is more of an absurd cartoon than any of the Barbies or Kens. Mattel HQ is some kind of surreal labyrinth tower out of The Matrix. A random receptionist can handle herself like James Bond in a car chase, for reasons that are [handwaved in a gag].
VII
So. Yes. There is the sequence in the third act where Ken takes over Barbieland with the power of patriarchy. This is pretty much as bad as it can be. And I say this as someone who thinks that the movie probably did actually need a plot thread doing roughly that kind of thing.
Almost as bad as it can be. The wannabe-patriarch Kens are gleefully goofy in a way that you can't help but love, or at least, I couldn't help but love it. Which has something to do with the writing and something to do with the charisma of all the Ken actors. The main Ken, Ryan Gosling's Ken, really seems to believe that being a successful patriarch has a lot to do with riding majestic horses and wearing a giant fur coat without a shirt, and when he takes over Barbie's Dream House he names it Ken's Mojo Dojo Casa House -- that kind of thing.
But. Apart from that, it's real unfortunate. The justification for Ken's ability to conquer Barbieland with patriarchy, instantly and effortlessly, is -- in almost so many words -- they had no defenses against it, it was like the American Indians encountering smallpox. I...don't think I need to spell out the problems with that.
Worse yet, the whole sequence is soaked in, uh, let's call it "2014-era upper-middle-class social-status-oriented feminism." The real bad behavior on the part of the Kens, the stuff they do when they're not being adorably weird, is: mansplaining their extensive opinions about cars and movies, and wanting to show off how helpful and knowledgeable they are to "damsels" who are having trouble using machines or computers. Apparently that's the real problem at hand, the causus belli of the gender wars. The way that you deprogram a patriarchy-brainwashed Barbie is by...ranting to her about the stereotypical social irritations of upper-middle-class women (e.g. "you have to keep yourself thin but not act like you care about being thin," "you have to be a confident leader but also be nurturing and supportive," etc.) [note that the Barbies of Barbieland have never encountered these irritations, at least not at the hands of men]. And the girlboss victory montage consists of having the Barbies put on deceptive manipulative bimbo acts to stroke the Kens' egos, which sure is one way to depict girlboss feminist victory.
But the most unforgivable thing of all is the depiction of the patriarchy-brainwashed Barbies. They're lad-magazine caricatures, endlessly offering their Kens "brewski beers," dressing up as French maids, gazing on in cow-eyed adoration as their Kens mansplain stuff to them.
Barbie does, in fact, have a problematic history with the patriarchy. And it does not look like that.
VIII
@brazenautomaton:
Barbie isn’t someone who had to fight through the patriarchy to be seen as good enough to be an astronaut even though she’s a woman. Barbie’s a fucking astronaut because she’s fucking Barbie of course she’s good enough to be an astronaut.
That is...one aspect of the deep Barbie lore. It is the Barbie-nature that Mattel was trying to push, as far back as my own childhood; it's certainly the Barbie-nature that Mattel is trying to push in this movie. But there is another side to Barbie, even older and even more fundamental than Senator Astronaut Veterinarian Barbie, and you can't make a postmodern movie-about-Barbie without addressing it.
This is Barbie the fashion doll. The Barbie who is an icon of ultra-consumerist teenage girlhood, whose life is defined by her fancy clothes and her fancy car. The Barbie whose most salient traits are her hourglass figure and her long blonde hair and her feet that are always posed to fit into high heels. The Barbie of "math class is tough!" The Barbie who is kinda vapid and shallow and, yes, boy-crazy.
How can you tell a story about Barbie wrestling with the culture of patriarchy, and not talk about that? How can you depict Barbie falling victim to the patriarchy and have it look nothing like that?
...the movie does bring up the specter of Vapid Consumerist Barbie, briefly. When Margot Robbie's Barbie first comes to the real world and meets with the sullen teenage daughter character, she has a litany of That Thing thrown in her face, and it makes her sad. But nothing is ever done with it, and it goes nowhere.
IX
And it could all have fit together so well. That's the hell of it.
You can imagine the version of the story in which Ken conquers Barbieland with patriarchy, because the Barbies are actually vulnerable to patriarchal narratives, because Vapid Consumerist Barbie is the chthonic serpent that gnaws at the foundations of Senator Astronaut Veterinarian Barbie civilization. He successfully makes them all forget that they're senators and astronauts and veterinarians, and turns them into airheaded teenage fashionistas who think that math class is tough.
And this avails him, and the other Kens, nothing. Even within the "patriarchal" version of Barbieland, Ken is still an afterthought and an appendage. He still gets treated like dogshit, just in a different idiom.
Because the thing that has always been true of Barbie, though every age and every phase of her mythos, is: she is the main character of her own story.
This is what the movie was telling us all the way back in the horrific 2001-pastiche prologue, right? Even when Barbie was just a swimsuit model, the point was that she let girls tell stories about themselves (or idealized/aspirational versions of themselves), not about boys or babies. That is a truer, and more powerful, feminist message about the meaning of Barbie than any message the movie actually bothers conveying.
The gag scene practically writes itself: the brainwashed Barbies are sitting around in a giggly slumber-party huddle talking about how dreamy Ken is, and actual Ken cannot get a word in edgewise, he can't even get them to notice he's there, because even Vapid Consumerist Barbie is fundamentally centered in her own life. Her narrative is not about a boy, it's about the experience of being a girl (mostly engaging with other girls) who likes thinking and talking about boys. Which is very much beside the point, if you started out with the complaint that your girlfriend never paid any attention to you.
Patriarchy hurts men too, indeed.
X
The movie ends, as I've intimated, in a disappointing squidge of thematic confusion. Barbie announces that she never really loved Ken, and leaves him, because...well, because these days the smart-set target audience is allergic to romantic narratives that Produce the Couple, as far as I can tell. Then she goes to the real world and becomes a real girl, a move that means nothing and is nonsensical even by the standards of the Barbie metaphysics, because the storytellers don't know how to end her arc and Becoming a Real Girl is the sort of thing that feels like a meaningful conclusion.
The Kens...sigh...the Kens ask for equal rights in Barbieland, more or less, and get told, "nah, but we'll throw you some bones." And they're happy with this, more or less, because they're dumb and don't really care. The narrator says, approximately, "maybe someday they'll make as much progress as women have in the real world." Haw haw.
It's probably too much to hope for a movie like this to be willing to say something substantive about responsibility and kindness in relationships. It's almost certainly too much to hope for a movie like this to be willing to say something about the nature of love symbols and love narratives. But all the pieces really were there, laid out very conspicuously. The movie could have wrapped up with: Ken doesn't need to be more important than Barbie, he doesn't even need to be as important as Barbie, he just needs to be treated with human decency. And if little girls are going to play with Barbies, and fantasize about having cute guys hanging all over them -- maybe they should have functional models of romance and human connection in which to root their fantasies, and not terrible ones.
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sealpup9 · 2 years
Text
ATTN ARTISTS-- AI LIGHTING PROGRAM (AKA CLIPDROP) IS TAKING YOUR ARTWORK
The AI Lighting website is actively taking any uploaded images and training AI to make (edit: AI Generated art. Possibly NFTS, please see edit below.). I've seen some people talking on here about how there's no harm in using Clipdrop because it's teaching them how to properly light things, but nothing about how the program takes your artwork and uses it to make AI generated artwork/NFTs up to five years after you upload stuff.
Artists: do not use services like these. Always be suspicious of sites like these.
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I had major hesitation and suspicion upon seeing this as is and now theres actual proof, so....
EDIT:
Sources for the threads above: 1 2
So some people have been saying that just because the co-founder is an NFT bro doesn't necessarily mean that they are using the AI for that specific purpose and I think they're right it's just extremely scummy that they can use your art to create AI Generated images and NFTs are literally AI Generated images, so that's the train of thought that me and many other artists have been concerned about.
 I personally would not want my artwork to be used to teach AI how to make artwork or improve AI generation because i personally believe there's something extremely morally incorrect about taking art from artists, feeding it into an AI, using it to generate artwork, and claiming that artwork as your own. There are threads on twitter that discuss how AI is the creator, the person using the AI is actually the client, and the client in this case is absolutely horrific--
“The reason people are getting increasingly frustrated with AI "artists" is that no, they AREN'T artists. They're nightmare clients. They tell the AI what they want, demand infinite revisions of it, and once finally satisfied, claim the work as their own. I have painted characters and weapons for clients, and while yes, the cool designs they paid me to draw are THEIR concepts, they did not paint it, and they are not calling themselves the artist who did the commission!” - @Anodesu on Twitter
Recently, an AI Generated piece won a contest worth actual money, and many of the artists who lost were rightfully upset.
Something that we need to remember is to listen to artists when they talk about how AI could very seriously take over the market due to the fact that there are so little laws in regards to it, and jobs are already being lost in fields like journalism due to the use of AI generated works.
I think we need to be thinking about these specific questions?
Should it be legal for websites like this to put sneaky things in their TOS in regards to creating AI artwork using any uploaded images?
Should it be legal for creators of AI to feed their AI works that they do not have the rights to to make their AI create artwork?
How many artistic jobs are going to be lost due to AI taking the artwork of others without paying for it, and generating artwork that people don't have to pay for?
These are questions we just don't know the answer to, and with how slow lawmakers have been in terms of privacy laws online, and how slow they've been in regards to NFTs, it's going to be a while before we really see how much this will impact artists and freelancers.
To finish this off, I’d like to post this thread in regards to how AI generated art is art theft:
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In my opinion, I am fully against AI generated artwork unless the creator of the AI only feeds art that they have the rights to/permission to. That being said, I believe this kind of thing needs to be an “opt-in” sort of reasoning, meaning if you want to give your artwork to AI, then go for it. But things like Clipdrop and other image-uploading sites make very sneaky additions to their TOS that artists need to be aware of.
Edit (part 2):
I want everyone denying even the possibility of this being used for NFTs to start using your critical thinking skills for just a moment. Nothing in life is going to be black and white, and no company is required by law to say exactly what they are using their tech for. This post is a means to inform artists that their artwork can be taken and used to create AI-Generated artwork, and many artists have come out with information and concerns about this technology. Please make your own decisions, but do not call this information fearmongering, as it's simply information.
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How many words is too many? I have written over 80,000 words already and don't have a computer to edit properly. I've already decided to split the story among multiple books. But how many should each be? I am aiming for a basic novel to a little bit longer, but as a first-time author, I don't want to write something too long and not get anyone to read it.
Finding Your Story's Target Word Count
"How many words is too many" depends on what you're writing. Every type of story and every genre has a different word count range, and the specific ranges vary depending on who you ask. Here are some general ranges you can target...
Story Type:
Short Stories - 1,000 - 5,000 words Novellas - 20,000 to 50,000 words Novels - 50,000 - 110,000 words Epic Novel - 110,000 words and up (though these are rare)
Age Category:
Middle Grade novels - 25,000 - 40,000 words Young Adult novels - 45,000 - 80,000 words New Adult novels - 60,000 - 85,000 words Adult novels - 65,000 - 110,000
Genre:
Literary novels - 80,000 to 110,000 words Romance novels - 50,000 to 80,000 words Fantasy novels - 90,000 to 110,000 words Mystery novels - 70,000 to 90,000 words
It's important to remember that a book series isn't one long novel chopped up into smaller books. Each book in a series needs to have its own story arc. In other words, a beginning/inciting incident, middle/rising action, and end/climax and denouement. That said, you will need to look at the completed story and identify the natural story arcs that exist within it to figure out where each book should end and the next book should begin.
Something else to consider is your publishing goal. If you plan on pursuing traditional publishing, you might look into writing an in-depth summary of the entire story and working with a developmental editor or book coach to figure out how to best divvy up the story between books. That way, you'll ensure that book one is as strong as it can be, which will increase the likelihood of getting a book deal. After that, if your book sells well enough to warrant the publishing of the next book, you will have some guidance on where to go from there.
If you're planning to self-publish, you can still look into working with an editor or book coach, or even a critique partner, or you can just make the best decision you're able to about how to divide each book. Again, what matters is that each part of the story centers on its own individual story arc.
Something else to consider: if you have a really long story that you want to chop up into pieces rather than individual books, you might look into posting it as a serial on a site like Wattpad, Kindle Vella, Ream, or similar services. Serialization allows you to take a long story and chop it up into sizeable pieces, such as "episodes," and then you don't have to worry so much about dividing it up into books with their own individual story arcs.
One final consideration: Not having the ability to edit properly is not an excuse to publish an unedited work of fiction. No one wants to read an unedited story, even if it's chopped up into pieces. If you want to publish this story, whether online, traditionally, or self-published, you need to find a way to edit it properly and make sure you're putting a tight and polished version of the story out into the world.
Here are some additional links:
Self-Editing Tips Editing Tips Ten Ways to Cut Your Word Count
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lains-reality · 10 months
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hi!
I don’t actually really know how to apply any ND knowledge.
I know that there is nothing to do, but everybody seems to get the hang of it somehow and I just don’t.
I can’t really see the difference between my ego saying that everything is perfect or ME saying it. I try to remember that I am Self and I don’t need anything because it is perfect, but I don’t feel as if I am progressing.
I feel as if I am not applying anything I have learned properly. Any advice?
"I don’t actually really know how to apply any ND knowledge."
here's a practical guide.
all you need to do is act from this.
take it seriously. really remind yourself of it.
getting annoyed? 'this is not me, but the character'
walking outside? 'oh wow its kinda crazy this is just a dream'
making food? 'rice only exists because of my thought of it, i wonder what would happen if i stopped thinking of rice's existence lol'
seeing people talk on the phone? 'that body and life is also mine...'
"but I don’t feel as if I am progressing."
let go of the idea of progressing. just allow yourself to be. do you see that you want vanessa to see that shes Self? vanessa wants progress. Self already is.
edit: if can't detach from everything, then accept more. accept more bodies and circumstances. get used to really pondering over 'wow that culture, way of life, style etc is also mine'. by accepting more, you'll end up negating what you aren't - a body-mind. bcs there's no way you can be all the bodies but are stuck to one clump of cells and a thought.
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lincolndjarin · 8 months
Text
Good Manners
main masterlist ✧ kinktober masterlist ✦
kinktober : day one - afab!agent!reader x dieter bravo
prompt : cock warming [ 18+ mdni ]
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word count : 0.8k words
summary : dieter is a brat.
warnings, etc. : cock warming (obvi, but also like barely any LMAO), male masturbation, reader is described as wearing glasses and having manicured nails, sort of sub!dieter
a/n : happy first of october!! can't believe it's finally here!! so uhh if you saw that is was originally day two no you didn't lmao, i'm still editing a lot of them so they're likely to change in order lmao
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“You whine too much.” You stare at him over the rim of your glasses that have slipped down your nose. 
“If I have to read one more fucking script I’m gonna lose it.” He throws the binder in his hands across the couch. 
Not a great sign considering he’s two scripts deep into a pile of well over a dozen. 
“Just a few more, then we can order food and take a break.” You’re shuffling through papers trying to sort out his contracts.
Not like he cared about the money.
He only did a movie if he liked the script. 
Which he hated reading. 
“Can you at least sit closer to me?” His voice shifts up a bit, he gets so nasally when he whines.
There’s a reason you’re on the other couch. 
 “If I sit closer you won’t get anything done.” You push your glasses up the bridge of your nose, shooting him a warning glare.
“I’m already not getting anything done.” He throws his head back, spreading out on the couch. 
“And who’s fault is that?”
“Just come sit with me.” He’s practically throwing a tantrum with the way he stomps his foot and crosses his arms in front of him. 
“Use your words Dieter, I know that’s not what you really want, I’m not giving it to you unless you ask properly.” You’ve told him this a hundred times already. 
“Come sit on my cock.” He grumbles almost petulantly. You tilt your head down staring at him over your glasses with your eyebrows raised expectantly, when you clear your throat he sits up a little straighter. “Please?”
“You need to work on your manners.” You look down at the spreadsheet you’re struggling to fill out. “Touch yourself, when I’m done with this I’ll deal with you.” You begin chewing the end of your pen as he lets out an obscenely loud moan. “What do we say, Dieter?”
“Thank you.” He’s already shoved his sweatpants halfway down his thighs.
“Thank you, what?” 
“Thank you ma’am.” You watch as he enthusiastically spits in his palm. 
“Mhmm.” You try your best to return to your work but he isn’t making it easy on you. 
Dieter Bravo, the actor that he is, always putting on a show. 
You know he’s trying to speed you up and you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t working. Letting his head fall back with a moan straight out of a porno as he spits on his hand, reaching down to cup his balls before stroking himself languidly. 
After a few minutes of listening to him whine, you finally look up, watching him with an uninterested look as he thrusts his hips upwards, fucking his fist as he stares at you with wide pleading eyes. He fucking loves this. It’s his favorite game, over the years you were shocked to learn that Dieter Bravo, alleged lover of attention, got off on being ignored by you. Nothing made him harder than when you disregarded him. 
He lets out a familiar keen as you watch him, you bullshit your way through the rest of the form you’re working on, not looking up as you speak. 
“If you come I won’t touch you for a month.” It’s an empty threat but you know he’ll take it seriously. He squeezes the base of his cock with a groan, his chin falling forward to rest on his chest as he lets out a breathy whimper. 
You collect all of your papers, making your way across the room, and setting them down on the couch next to him.
“I expect you to read every single one of those Dieter, I mean it.” You slide your panties down your legs, stepping out of them before hiking up your pencil skirt and straddling his lap. 
“Yeah, of course-“ His voice trails off into a strangled cry as you waste no time and sink down onto his length. You close your eyes for a moment, relishing in the feeling of fullness as he squirms a bit beneath you, adjusting himself. 
“I mean it.” You compose yourself quickly, frowning as he rolls his eyes. 
“Yeah, I know-” You grab him by the jaw, your manicured nails leaving little crescent marks on his chin. Once his attitude dwindles you release him. 
“You will sit still and you will read your scripts, you will not speak unless it is to tell me you are done and you will not touch me without permission. If you’re good I might let you come.” You click your pen to accentuate your point, already getting back to work as you start filling out another form against his shoulder. “Is that understood?” You don’t bother looking at him, you already know what expression you’ll see plastered on his face. 
“Yes.” He sounds awfully satisfied with himself. Now you turn to face him, setting the tip of the pen underneath his chin to make him meet your gaze. 
“Yes, what?” Just as you suspected, he’s grinning from ear to ear, his eyes half closed as he leans back with a pleased look on his face, picking up one of the unread binders. 
“Yes, ma’am.” His cock twitches eagerly inside of you the moment he says those words. 
“Good boy, now read your scripts Dieter.”
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a/n : this had basically no cock warming in it bc i'm feeling silly w these prompts but whatever lmaoo. happy first of october !!
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anonimityblog4000 · 28 days
Text
I actually hate having to post this, but
I feel like I have to post this in response to some recent drama stirring. I will cop to making an alt blog to post this because the hate around this has been virulent.
Recently this post has been shared regarding another artist creating locked tomb fan art
In this post which you should read they make the claim that the creator of these pieces 100% for certain created them with AI image generation software generating quite a lot of attention. The problem is that their supposed supporting evidence is INCREDIBLY flawed to the point of contradiction and nonsense. For example both of these cropped images
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are given as evidence of AI generation, claiming that the smudge is the result of AI failure and that the hand is CLEARLY ai generated…except that even a cursory examination and familiarity of what AI image generation ends up looking like would make it obvious that these aren’t AI hands and are just…normal hand drawn hands. As for the smudge we could easily explain that as the artist not noticing a mistake in one of their layers before posting, but we don’t know that. Except we do.
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Because if you were to look at the artists blog now you might notice they have made some corrections and small edits to the original piece and lo and behold…no smudge. Now here is where things get properly silly, instead of drawing the obvious conclusion from this that the artist being able to go in and fix the layers of their work means that they actually drew it THEY CLAIM THAT THE ABILITY TO DRAW AND EDIT IN THE EXACT STYLE OF THE PIECE IS FURTHER EVIDENCE OF AI.
WHAT.
I don’t think I need to point out to most people that AI image generation tools do not work that way and they certainly don’t allow you to make subtle targeted fixes and edits.
There is also a claim that the artist admitted to using AI to produce the piece which is a gross distortion of what they explained, the artist openly stated that they have tried using image gen tools to assist with their thumbnailing process. Let us be clear that thumbnailing is NOT producing any sort of final piece but is simply the process of brainstorming ideas and concepts. It’s seriously gross to flat out lie and claim the artist said anything different. Thankfully someone else screenshotted this so there’s actual evidence that accusations are being made that are straight up lies.
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It is also at this point we should take a look at some of the artists other publicly available work.
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I chose this selection because another accusation in the post that is hard evidence of AI is that because the posted pieces are “too different” in style from other earlier work posted on their blog, it should be fairly obvious how silly this is with even a small sample of what they have produced. This is an artist who obviously has the ability to work in a wide range of artistic styles and mediums but instead this is being used to claim they…can’t art? It’s also worth pointing the obvious that there are plenty of works in that artist’s portfolio in the exact same mucha style, including ones that are literally hand drawn on paper. Works that literally predate the availability of image generation software going back years. It is a complete farce to suggest this person CANT DRAW HANDS.
Frankly it is incredibly disappointing that the community is barraging this artist with insults and hate because of one persons incredibly flawed accusations. A person that I might add has deleted comments on their post that disagreed with them while at the same time castigating the artist for blocking them and deleting their post as evidence of their guilt.
While this isn’t conclusive in and of itself I’ll end with this.
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It’s more effort than the accuser went to before rallying a witch hunt against someone else.
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