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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #446

“so you can throw me to the wolves / tomorrow i will come back, leader of the whole pack”

Favourite cheese? American. Superman or Batman? I know literally nothing of Superman, but I like Batman. Who are your best friends? The only person I consider a best friend is Sara. Name the 3 most important people in your life: My mom, Sara, and... I suppose myself since I cherish my mental health VERY deeply. Are you currently learning from anyone how to play any instruments? No. Do you know anyone who is overly flirty with people? Girl or a boy? In my personal opinion, yes. I do believe it's possible to be "overly" flirty, considering you can really lead people on. It's a she. Do you believe vampires are real? Not the stereotypical Twilight kind. No. Have you ever been to a porn website? Were you addicted to it afterword? No. I'm really not into that. What is the most disgusting thing you think the opposite sex can do? I think the most disgusting thing anyone can do is commit rape. Would you rather be able to teleport or freeze time? Which one seems best? I feel teleportation is obviously more convenient and useful in dangerous situations. Have you seen the movie Twister? Did the tornadoes look real to you? LKJFL;AKSDJFKLASJDLFKA;WE NOOOOOOOOOO. I am WAY too terrified of tornadoes to watch that. Have you actually been through a devastating natural disaster before? Hurricane Floyd was pretty devastating. I was too young to really remember it, though. Did your mom ever fix your eggs and bacon into a smiley face as a kid? She probably did. What fast food place, in your opinion, has the best french fries? BOJANGLE'S, AHHHHHHHHHHHH. Do you believe one day aliens might take over the planet Earth? I mean, it's possible, but I don't know. Do you remember when they used to actually throw candy out at parades? I didn't know they stopped. Does it bother you when people burp around you or do you do it too? I couldn't possibly care less, it's a natural bodily function. Just because of societal standards though, I don't burp in public, though, but only around family and close friends. What is one kind of music you’d do anything to not listen to in the car? Anything like rap that has a STUPIDLY loud bass that just annoys everyone within a ten mile radius. When was the last time you babysat, if ever? Did anything bad happen? A year or two ago, for my nephew. No one else was free to watch him, so I had no choice. Nothing bad happened, besides nearly having a panic attack. Do you ever talk to people you met online through webcam? Or is that weird? No. Even Sara and I don't do it, because I'm too self-conscious of how I look. Even though she's seen me plenty before irl. Would you ever consider becoming a scientist? Why would you or why not? Well, I majored in biology briefly... I wanted to be a wildlife biologist. I just adore animals and thought I could do it. I just couldn't handle school. When is the next time you’ll talk to the cousin you’re closest to? I'm not especially close to any of my cousins. Are you really into vintage things? Have you ever been into that stuff? Yessss! is writing something that you enjoy doing? Definitely. Would you rather read or write? Write. Would you rather draw or take photographs? If I wind up being very proud of the product, I prefer drawing, but I take pictures far more. When was the last time you cheated at something? I have no clue. Has anyone ever copied off of your homework assignments? I think so? Do you have any pictures of celebs saved to your computer? ... *stares at my folder labelled "Mark"* What would you consider your favorite holiday? Why is this? Christmas. I love the whole vibe of it. The weather, the smells, the treats, my niece's and nephew's excitement... I adore all the lights and decorations, the gratefulness for family and your loved ones in general... I just love Christmas. If you’re a girl, do you have big hips? Too big? I'd say my hips are normal. Girls, do you think you look good in dresses or not? God no. Not anymore. Have you ever taken a pottery class before? Nope. How many times have you seen Star Wars? Be honest. Once. I didn't like it. Has your best friend ever made you cry? Yes. But in her defense, we've both made the other cry. Have you ever entered a talent competition? God no, I ain't got shit to flaunt. Are you smiling in your Facebook profile picture? Yes. If you wear eye shadow, do you put on a dark colour or a light? And if you wear mascara, what colour is it? I only ever wear black for both of those. What is your favourite Christmas movie? Jim Carrey's How the Grinch Stole Christmas. What do you get complimented on the most? My Markiplier tattoo, actually. What do you think of your best friend’s ex? One I REALLY don't like, the other I'm neutral about. Are you biracial? No. Do you have Pop-Tarts in your house right now? No. We try to not buy them, given they're just TOTALLY empty calories. They don't fill me at all. Is anyone’s birthday coming up? No. Does/did either of your parents serve in the military? No. Do you like sour candy? I LOVE sour candy. Where would you like to go on your honeymoon? Alaska, to see the Northern Lights. Do you usually wear sunglasses when you’re driving? I haven't driven in well over a year. Hell, maybe two. But no, because I'd need prescription sunglasses. Ignoring nutrition, could you live off veggies for the rest of your life? God no. Has anyone taken their shirt off in front of you? Yeah. What time do you usually have dinner? 5:30-6:30, usually. What’s your favourite meat? Chicken, I think. What is your favourite meal of the day and why? Breakfast. I just enjoy breakfast foods. What colour is your shampoo? White. Tell me a silly little old wive’s tale you believed when you were a child: My older sister got me to believe that if you said a word a ridiculous amount of times, it'd be the only word you knew how to say anymore, lmao. Shut up, I was little. What was the last magazine you bought? Do you subscribe to any? I don't buy magazines. Whose Facebook profile did you last look at? Was there anything that caught your attention? Uh, that's a good question. Do you regret your last relationship? Not at all. What’s better, mashed potatoes or sweet potatoes? Mashed potatoes, though I'm picky with them and the texture. Did you ever used to make cookies, cakes, or pie with your grandma? No. Do you like kids? Not especially. They ask too many questions and can be really rude, even though I know they usually don't mean to be. What are you listening to? I'm watching Gab Smolders play Dino Crisis 2. I finished her playthrough of Final Fantasy X, so now I feel a void in my soul that I am trying to fill with a new series lmao. Do you burn incense? Not really anymore. I'm not against it, I just... haven't. What is your favorite kind of cracker? Cheese-Itz. Can you name a single song by Billy Joel without looking it up? Yeah; I can name a few, actually. My dad loves Billy Joel, so I heard him a lot growing up. "Piano Man" is a classic. Do you like regular peppermint candy canes, or do you prefer different flavored ones [fruits, bubble gum, cinnamon, etc.]? I actually really like the Jolly Rancher ones. Have you ever been kissed while sitting atop the hood of a car? That's actually possible... but I'm not sure. I think I have a faint memory of lying on a car hood with Jason before. What do you think is the dumbest/tackiest piercing? I don't like calling a piercing either of those, like if they make someone feel more confident and attractive, good for them. I can say I'm personally not a fan of the smiley piercing, though. Have you ever requested a song on the radio? No. When I was a kid at a birthday party, though, one of the girls did. Does your mother still take care of you if you get ill? She helps a lot, yeah. What is one song that always brings back memories every time you hear it? Honestly, too many. I attach way too aggressively to songs. Do you currently have any pimples? Not currently, no. Did anything disturb your sleep at all last night? Ugh, yes. I couldn't sleep for shit. How does it make you feel looking at pics with your ex and someone else? I have only seen one picture of Jason with the girl he dated after me and it. Set. Me. On. Fucking. Fire. It's pathetic. If you’re not in college, why? All it did was give me emotional breakdowns. What do you think about MTV? I am way too out of the loop on what goes on on any TV channel to answer this. What was your very first day of your very first job like? What’d you do? How long did it take you to get the hang of it, and feel comfortable with working? This was waaaay too long ago... All I remember is actually being hopeful, though nervous. I never got to the point of feeling comfortable there. Or at any job. If you have a dog, are they friendly to strangers or other dogs? We don't have a dog, but we do have a cat that is EXTREMELY skittish around strangers. Someone he doesn't know comes through the door? He's bolting to hide. Do people ever comment on or joke about your driving? Well, I got flipped off once by a driver, so... I'd consider that a silent comment. I, to this day, don't know why they (it was a group of guys) did it, but it's stuck with me. What was the last thing to move you? Are you easily moved or inspired? The ending of FFX alsdkfjkaljlkwjer. And yes. If you`ve ever seen your very favorite band, did you cry when you saw them? Was it like a dream come true? If you`ve never seen them, do you think you would? I haven't, but I probably would a little bit. Of all the reality competitions you’ve watched, who are some of your all-time favorite contestants and what shows were they from? From America's Got Talent, I adore(d) Landau Eugene Murphy Jr., as well as Prince Poppycock. I keep up with them both on Facebook. Ever had a friend named Alex or John? One of my closest online friends was Alex. A couple years ago she just... got a boyfriend and fell off the face of the earth. Are you happy with your relationship status? I mean... no, I'm ridiculously lonely, but being single is for the best right now. What kind of stuff do you like on your hot dogs? Just ketchup and mustard. Have you ever been in a spelling bee? No. What is the most annoying thing that your parents do? Mom absolutely always assumes she's right. Dad repeats himself like CRAZY. Would you say you’re someone who has good manners? Yes. Did you parents know what gender you were before you were born? Actually, the doctors couldn't determine mine (or any of Mom's kids') because my legs were ALWAYS crossed when they did ultrasounds. Mom says she "knew" I was a girl, though. Have you ever been addicted to something unhealthy? I'm addicted to caffeine, yes. Who makes the best desserts in your entire family? Hm, I dunno. Do you have good dreams or nightmares more? I have very severe sleep apnea that results in very violent nightmares almost any time I sleep without my APAP mask. Even WITH the damn mask, I have them a lot. When was the last time someone insulted you? What was the insult? *shrug* Do you have trouble reading small fonts? Yes. I used to find it aesthetically pleasing, but my vision is just too bad now, even with my (shitty) glasses. Do you know anybody that believes that magic/witchery truly exists? I think so. Do you find watching animals in their natural habitat to be exciting & fascinating? Absolutely!! The last time you had sex: did you want it, or did the other person want it? ... You know it's supposed to be a mutual desire, right?? What does your sibling(s) call you? "Britt." Has anyone you’ve known claimed to be psychic? Maybe? I'm unsure. Did/do you believe them? Hell no. I don't believe in psychics and believe people who claim to be so are manipulative pieces of shit. Is anything annoying you right now? I am bored to an inexplicable level askldjfla;wejlr. Have you ever worn a pair of scrubs? Yeah. Anything in your room that you’re hiding from your parents or someone else? No. Have you ever felt abandoned? Well yes. By definition, my dad abandoned our family. Where are you? I’m in my bed. What’s been the worst part of this day? I've just been so, so bored. I'm sick and fucking tired of dealing with anhedonia. Who last encouraged you to better yourself? My therapist.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''throne'' by bring me the horizon

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solohux · 4 years

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@anonynous submitted: Poe:- As he should've been

I am still so fucking salty that Poe got left behind as the awkward third wheel that no one seemed to know what to do with. His character was horribly underutilized and if anything, went through character regression, not character development! TFA!Poe and TLJ/TROS!Poe are practically different characters! It just doesn't seem.... natural for the compassionate, confident (NOT arrogant!) pilot we met in TFA to suddenly be totally ok with sacrificing dozens of his fellow pilots for ego in TLJ and to have been an ex-drug dealer in his youth as revealed in TROS!

By no means am I saying that Poe should be flawless. But his flaws and failings should’ve made… sense. He can be compassionate! Just have it get the better of him! Like say:- Poe takes every death of a pilot under his command hard. He feels guilty, as if he’s failing his pilots personally by not preventing their deaths. That would even tie into his extended backstory as revealed in that comic series he had! So Poe over-extends himself, he refuses to put his pilots in danger when it’s not “necessary” so he’s constantly volunteering to go on dangerous solo missions…

Just like the one where we were introduced to him in TFA!

Holy shit! Having Poe develop a Savior Complex could even have made TLJ work better! You could even keep the bungled attack in the opening! So Poe leads the attack on the First Order, he places himself in a truly ridiculous amount of danger to give the evacuation enough time to get away… but it still goes horribly wrong! Despite Poe’s best efforts his pilots die like flies, he’s one of the only survivors.

Leia can still be disappointed in Poe, only she’s upset with him because she knows he puts himself in too much danger! She can still want him to put himself in a less “In the air with his troops” mindset! But now she’s genuinely concerned that Poe will never get the chance to transition to a “Lead from the command deck” role like she wants him to, because with the way he’s been acting he’s going to get himself killed sooner rather than later!

Then Leia is incapitated shortly thereafter… (Or we can just substitute her for Holdo, whichever way works)

Now we have a distraught Poe, who is pretty much convinced that he’s a failure (Because not only did so many of his pilots die, his mentor is disappointed with him!) and then Holdo sweeps in and doesn’t want much to do with him!

Only now Holdo has a different motive for giving Poe a wide berth. She’s one of Leia’s personal friends and is an accomplished military leader in her own right. She takes one look at Poe and immediately knows what type of person he is. So instead of barring Poe from being amongst the leadership and planning The Resistance’s next move because she doesn’t like his attitude… she tells him to stay out of things and get some rest because she can see that he’s in no emotional shape to be of any help to her!

Poe naturally is even more freaked out and left frantic! He's lost confidence in himself, but he just has to help! There must be something that he can do....

So there we go, Poe can still be a “menace” to Holdo during her short term of leadership (Or he can simply go on the ill-fated mission with Finn as the first draft of TLJ’s script had planned to do!) but now TLJ!Poe is more consistent with TFA!Poe because we have changed his motives for acting the way he does throughout the film. Making Poe (And the various character he interacts with!) seem more sympathetic even if his attempts to help just keep making things worse.

That can cumulate in Poe learning a valuable lesson “That he can’t save everyone and shouldn’t light himself on fire just to keep others warm” and thus actually develop as a character.

Oh my god, now I’m even more pissed off at Rian Johnson for not taking that route. It just seems… so obvious! It would’ve been a refreshing change of direction ( ;) A “subversion” if you will) for Poe’s character archetype (Seriously, just how common is it for male leaders to be so emotionally invested in those under their command that they become distressingly self-sacrificial?) and more importantly, not stereotypical!

Ugh! And now that TLJ has been fixed, TROS would go so much more smoothly! You can have a more nuanced Poe, growing weary and perhaps a bit jaded by the seemingly endless war. He’s transitioned into a more traditional leadership role like Leia wanted him too. All of this causes some tension between him and Finn and Rey.

Poe can regain more of his original optimism by having him go with Finn and Rey ( :) And Chewie! And the Droids!) on the big mission, where he can have opportunities to patch up his bond with Rey and Finn and thus now that he’s feeling more like himself again Poe can inspire more people to join in the final push against The First Order (There we go! The perfect way to bring the Spice Runners into the film without giving some bullshit excuse about how Poe was a member of their gang as a teenager!) and then during the big final battle Poe can showcase all that he’s learned over the course of the trilogy by comparing and contrasting what he does there to what he did during TFA’s opening scene!

Lol, now I’ve made myself even more mad! It’s just so clear that the Sequel Trilogy genuinely could’ve worked -Even without a lot of big changes!- had the characters simply been more consistently written.

I just re-railed Poe’s character simply by making some small changes to his motives! Things can still progress closely to how they did in the various films’, but now Poe is a stronger character that does more stuff, has opportunities to naturally bond with Finn and Rey (And other characters too!) and again, isn’t stereotypical in any means!

I just kept Poe’s backstory (A rebel born of rebels! With a closer than usual relationship to the heroes of the Original Trilogy. Oh yes, I just realized that a potential childhood friendship with Ben could easily be worked in, which would help out with Kylo’s character as well…) in mind the whole time and had him react to various things happening as he logically should react!

-Sigh- If only Poe’s backstory had been upheld from the start…

But ultimately I am pleased with myself for coming up with all of this, so thanks for listening Lottie! Hope you didn’t mind me dumping this into your submission box. :) Hope you have a great day.

#submission #poe dameron #great thoughts darling 💕#I’m still salty about what they did to Poe too #but i’m salty about aaaall of the sequel trilogy characters to be honest #but Poe had so much potential #AGAIN ruined by TLJ in my opinion #the characterisations from TFA to TLJ were so wildly different that it’s fucking embarrassing #anyway #i digress #poe was let down #i like your idea better!!!!!!

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lindseyluvsdrag · 6 years

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Scorned Bridges Ch. 1

Fourth Installment of my OMC series. If you need to catch up before reading this, you can do so here (X) but I have a few “clips” in there to refresh ya memories ;)

Thanks for the patience guys, I hope you enjoy it :) Ignore any typos!

TW: Suicide Ideation, SMUT

Dressed in his favorite beanie, hoodie and ripped up jeans, Matt approached the doors of the elegant venue but was stopped by security.

“Sir, this is a black tie event.” “This event can suck my-” “Matt!” Jason squealed excitedly as he made his way over. “What are you wearing?” “Clothes,” he sassed. The brunette rolled his eyes. “Did you seriously come to a charity event dressed like that?” “This is for charity?” “Ugh, yeah. Did you read the full invitation?” “No,” he admitted, only slightly embarrassed as his anger outweighed anything else. “Well, yes. Due to my recent epiphany, I just want to do better things with my life. This is a charity event I put together to benefit kids struggling with disabilities, kids who have been abused, kids who feel neglected…all of this was in the invitation. If you didn’t want to come then you shouldn’t have, rather than showing up with an attitude.” Before Matt could reply, his stomach contorted in knots when he witnessed his ex-boyfriend cross the room. “What’s Apollo doing here?” “I invited him to speak.” Matt narrowed his eyes at his ex-husband. “What are you up to?” “What do you mean?” “I see you all over Instagram with this guy, who’s not even that cute, and now all of a sudden you’re throwing charity events and inviting Apollo? What the hell is going on?” “First of all, what’s on my or anyone else’s Instagram is none of your business. Daniel owns Understood, a nonprofit organization that provides help to parents of kids who have learning and attention issues. I reached out to him and we decided to collaborate. I wanted to include kids who have been abused so we can raise money for all of them. Apollo is a well known model with dyslexia who can bring awareness to the fact that so many kids are dropping out of school because they’re made feel stupid when they aren’t. So that’s my goal tonight and if you feel like being an asshole, please save it for someone else.” The rant left Matt feeling so shitty that he debated turning on his heel and leaving but he had a bigger heart than that. “Jason, I’m really sorry. If you’ll let me, I’ll come in and support wholeheartedly.” The brunette smiled. “Even if you’ll stick out like a sore thumb with that sock on your head?” “I’ll check my ego at the door.” “Thank you,” he said softly. “Let him in.” The burly security guard stepped to the side and allowed the man to enter. “I want you to introduce you to someone. Hey, Daniel,” the brunette called. “No,” Matt whispered in protest. “Ugh, this is gonna be so awkward.” “Yeah?” the bright eyed man replied. “This is Matt, the ex-husband you’ve heard so much about. Matt this is Daniel.” “It’s so nice to meet you,” he said, tone effortlessly charming. “Likewise,” Matt said dryly. “He’s also the one that called you trade.” Matt wanted to punch the brunette in the arm for that, but to his surprise, Daniel cackled. “Oh my God, that’s amazing. I wish.” The man raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you guys hooking up?” Jason folded his arms and gave Matt a look as he waited for the satisfaction he’d receive from Daniel’s answer. “Nooooo,” he assured. “We were super close in school but after that we just kinda lost touch. I missed his crazy ass but not that much.” Jason gave his friend a playful shove. “Besides,” Daniel continued as he raised his left hand. “I’m happily married.” “Oh…” Matt’s face made Jason smirk. “‘If you’re trying to make me jealous it isn’t working’,” the brunette mocked. The man turned bright crimson. “Well it didn’t.” Jason leaned in to whisper in his ear. “I’m glad because I’m beyond these childhood games. If I was fucking someone, you’d never know it…darling.” The glacial way that the brunette spoke made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. “We’d better get going,” Daniel said as he checked his watch. “Okay,” Jason chirped. “Later, Egghead.” “Later,” was his barely audible reply as he watched the man make his way towards the stage. Matt shook whatever the unknown emotion he was experiencing off and began to make his way towards the decadently decorated tables. He didn’t see any familiar faces until he spotted Apollo seated at a table that was full minus the seat next to the model. The man took a deep breath and made his way over. When Apollo made eye contact with him, his smile was bittersweet. “Is this seat taken?” Matt asked. “I don’t think so,” he said quietly. The man had no idea how much he’d missed the heavy Greek accent until now as he pulled out the chair and sat down. “You look great.” “Thanks…and so do you. Especially if you were going to the park.” “Yeah… I wish I could blame the fashion choice on a misunderstanding, but it really was me just being a jerk. I’m ready to own up to my mistakes and be that man again. Ya know?” Apollo nodded. “I’m sorry for not making you more of a priority…but like the amazing guy that you are, you went on to achieve something most of us dream about. You’re a true inspiration.” Apollo’s smile was soft. “Thank you.” “And I hope that you can forgive me.” “I do,” the man assured. Matt wanted to say more but Daniel’s tapping of the microphone on the podium made him hold his tongue. “Is this thing on?” he joked. “Hello everyone and thank you so much for coming out to support such an amazing event. We all know that kid who may struggle with learning, fitting in or accepting themselves and maybe you are that kid. As someone with ADHD, growing up was really tough; being misunderstood or mistaken for this being this burden on everyone would always upset me, so I made it my dream to help kids just like me. That’s why I founded Understood. To help parents better communicate with their children, because change starts in the home,” he said, finishing with a warm smile. “Thank you.” After everyone showered him in a hefty applause, Daniel spoke again. “Our next speaker will be Jason Dardo.” The brunette swiftly took the stage and his spot in front of the podium. “Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I’ll keep it short and sweet because there’s gonna be an amazing after party once we’re done.” The audience chuckled. “In addition to loving, everything that the Understood foundation stands for, I just wanted to bring awareness to children who are being abused and feel like they have no voice. They get to school and tell their teacher that they 'fell down’ or 'they were playing too hard’ out of sheer fear of retaliation from the ones who should love them the most: their families. So I want to add a new division to the Understood foundation that travels across the country, school to school, educating teachers of the warning signs and educating kids that love should never hurt.” His words were met with thunderous applause. Jason grinned and pulled a massive key from underneath the podium, urging Daniel to return to the stage. “This is the key to the new Understood rec center that is going to be opening in downtown Brooklyn. A place where kids can come and get help or just to have fun. I plan to have one placed in every major city across this country and I won’t stop until I do. Deal?” With tears in his eyes Daniel nodded and pulled Jason into a hug. The brunette kissed his cheek before turning towards the podium once more. “I honestly don’t think any of this will be possible without the face of the century, Apollo Katsopolis!” The model had a warm smile as he pushed himself away from the table and towards the stage. “Thank you for coming,” Jason told him as they embraced. “Thank you for having me.” Apollo graciously stood in front of the podium. “I’ll have to admit that I’m a little nervous. You’d think that someone who poses nude all the time would have more if a backbone but I don’t. Growing up I wished that I had a support system like Understood because it would’ve brought an end to the bullying, crying myself to sleep and the feeling of being so worthless that I wanted to end my own life. But I took those same emotions and channeled it into proving all the voices of people who doubted me wrong. And I want to use the platform that I’ve been blessed with to bring awareness to kids just like me. Dyslexia is not the disability,the voice in your head telling you that you can’t is. Thank you.” A little emotional from finally opening up and allowing himself to feel free for the first time in his life, Apollo quickly turned to leave the stage but Jason stopped him. “You are a big part of why tonight had to happen. What I did to you represents what happens to millions of kids everyday and it has to stop. So on behalf of you, me and Understood, I’ll be donating one hundred million dollars to schools across America and Greece to get more help for kids with dyslexia and other learning disabilities.” Apollo couldn’t hold back his tears any longer and broke down, but he wasn’t the only one. There wasn’t a dry eye in the place and the person who was the most moved was Matt. The man realized that he had to do better and that nothing should hold him back from achieving his goals. He couldn’t let any more opportunities pass him by and as the speakers left the stage, he chased after the man that he knew he couldn’t live without. “Hey,” Matt panted when he caught up to him. “Hey,” he replied. “Your speech was amazing.” “Thank you.” There was an awkward silence before Matt decided to just stop beating around the bush. “From the moment that I saw you, I knew that you were the one for me. Everything about you, enhances everything about me and I am dangerously in with you. From pizza to every Queen album, nothing in my life is complete until I’ve shared it with you,” he sniffled. “And I want you to be mine again.” The man smiled. And with tears streaming down his face he pulled Matt close until their lips connected in a passionate kiss. “I love you.” “Forever starts today, babe.” ---

Matt wiped the lens of his camera with his shirt before placing the viewfinder to his eye as he pointed it towards his lover.

“What are you doing?” the man grumbled from the bed.

“Capturing art,” he replied as he took a picture, then another.

The man covered his face with the blanket. “It's too early.”

“But you look so beautiful when you first wake up,” Matt protested. He grabbed the edge of the comforter, pulled it away and continued to take pictures.

He giggled. “Would you go away?”

“Nope,” Matt chirped as he straddled the man and zoomed into the his nose.

“Moró!” Apollo boomed with laughter. “I’m not that attractive.”

“You are to me.” Matt leaned down and kissed his boyfriend.

“Mmm,” he hummed. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

They kissed.

“Are we ordering in today or would you like to go out to eat for my last day before I go back to work?” Apollo asked.

Matt rocked his hips against his lover's groin. “Ordering in.”

Apollo let out a lusty exhale. “You read my mind.” He pulled Matt down into a kiss before helping the man out of his shirt and then boxers. After he was stripped down to nothing, Apollo guided Matt's waist to his face and took his dick into his mouth.

Matt gripped the top of the headboard in order to steady himself while Apollo worked his mouth up and down his shaft.

“Fuck, babe.”

The model took the praise in stride as he encouraged Matt to balance himself so that he could slip his fingers into him while still worshipping his dick with his mouth.

Matt giggled as he held on tighter to the headboard. “I'm gonna falllllllll.”

Apollo secured one arm around Matt's waist for added security while he deep throated his boyfriend's shaft and fingered his ass.

“Oh my God,” he moaned.

When Matt's dick was finally rock hard and oozing precum, Apollo rolled them over so that his lover's back was against the feather down mattress topper. The man took his time to leave a trail of gentle kisses from Matt's neck to navel before pushing his thighs towards his chest so that his mouth could have unobstructed access to his ass. He gave it firm licks and paired with two stroking fingers followed by a third, it had Matt moaning within no time.

“Mmmm, yes. Right there, baby,” Matt encouraged as he ran his fingers through Apollo's hair.

The model went on for several minutes, making sure that Matt was prepped and ready for everything that he had in store for him. He pulled out the last condom that they'd been reduced to after spending days sequestered in the bedroom. After Jason's charity event, the couple rushed to Matt's place in order to make up. And makeup. And makeup.

Apollo smeared a generous amount of lube onto Matt's hole and his own dick before pulling Matt close by the thighs.

“Eísai étoimos, moró?” he asked to see if his lover was ready.

“Nai agápi mou,” Matt responded after asking Apollo how to say ‘yes, my love’ in Greek awhile back.

Despite choppy dialect and having emphasis on the wrong syllables, Apollo thought that the man's attempt to speak his language was beautiful.

“You're so damn sexy,” he exhaled with lusty, hooded eyes.

Matt pulled the man down into a kiss and as they made out, Apollo took the opportunity to press his cock against his lover's entrance. Matt was tense for only a second before relaxing and allowing the man to slide his full length inside of him. No matter how many times they made love, Matt always needed to adjust to having Apollo fill him up and the man's tender kisses always seemed to help.

When he was ready Matt always braced himself by wrapping his arms around Apollo's back and the man took this as a cue to begin thrusting. Apollo always started off slow to make sure that his lover was okay. When Matt's expressions went from questioning to lusty or when Matt just demanded to be fucked harder, the man would pick up speed. Apollo pushed his lover's thighs closer to his chest, adjusting the angle so that he could have prime access to Matt's prostate. When he found it, Matt quivered in pleasure.

“Fuck,” he yelped out. “Harder, baby, please.”

Apollo always saw this as a personal challenge. He pinned Matt into the position even tighter and began to pound into the man's ass.

With each thrust, Matt whimpered out in pleasure. And when his toes began to curl, he knew exactly whose name to call.

“Apollooo,” he moaned. “You’re so good, fuck! I'm gonna cum.”

Apollo firmly gripped Matt's dick in his strong hand. “Not yet,” he ordered as he slowed his thrusts.

“Babyyyy,” Matt whined but Apollo quickly silenced him with a kiss. After a minute, Apollo released Matt's dick and began to thrust again.

“I hate edging,” Matt panted.

“You always say that until you have the best orgasms.”

He giggled. “True. But yo-” Matt squealed when Apollo pulled out and flipped him over onto his hands and knees.

“You hate edging, huh?”

Matt’s knees buckled when Apollo thrust right into him. He grabbed his lover by the waist and used it as leverage to relentlessly pound his ass.

“Yes, I hate it! I just wanna cum!” Matt declared.

“Oh, I'll make you cum,” Apollo assured. He gripped Matt's hair and gave it a firm tug as he continued to passionately fuck his lover.

Matt didn't have announce when he was about to cum, but the light tremor of his limbs let Apollo know that he'd done his job.

“Shit,” Matt moaned as a load of cum leaked out of his dick and onto the sheets.

Apollo pulled out and flipped Matt back over onto his back. Matt gestured for the man to come closer and when he did, he removed the condom and took his lover's cock into his mouth.

Matt deep throated Apollo's dick until Apollo exploded. The man swallowed every drop of the man's load until Apollo flopped onto the bed next to his lover.

“You're so perfect,” the model said as he pulled him close.

Matt lifted his camera and took another picture of the man. “No, you are.”

---

Jake pounded on Jason's door for the third time that day. “Hey, Jason! Whatta I need to do, take out a billboard to get my jacket back?! It's Dolce and Gabbana and I want it back!”

“Go away!” the man shouted from the other side.

“Give me my jacket and then I will!”

Jason didn't reply.

“You know what?” Jake grumbled as he rounded the building until he found the fire escape. He gave himself a silent yes when he discovered that the careless man had left the window unlocked. He opened it and made his way inside. “Jason! I'm getting my jacket!” Jake declared before the stench of warm alcohol, rotten food and horrendous body order hit his nose. “What the fuck is that smell, bro?!”

The man made his way out of the guest room down to the living room where he saw Jason sprawled out on the couch. With stained clothes, matted hair, a full beard and surrounded by trash, the man looked as if he hadn't moved from that spot in weeks.

“Dude, is that you that smells like that?” Jake wheezed.

“Get...out,” Jason snarled.

“Where is my jacket?”

The man didn't respond.

“Okay, I guess whatever's in your closet is up for grabs then.”

“Go ahead... I don't need it anymore.”

Jake began to make his way towards the bedroom but he stopped, gagged on the deep breath he took and turned around. “What's wrong with you?”

“I just don't...want...to live.”

“Why? You had that amazing charity event a few weeks ago. You're doing great things for kids across the country.”

“You think I actually care about that stuff?” Jason retorted. “I only did all of that because you told me that if I got my shit together, Matt would want to take me back.”

Jake made a face. “I said that?”

“Yes! At Max's wedding!”

***

“Heyyy Jakey-Pooo,” Jason slurred as he threw his arms around the lonely man at the bar. Jake cackled. “Um, hi? What the fuck did you drink?” “Vintage Merlotttt. It’s my favoriteeeeee.” “Well that’s good I’m glad you’re having a good time,” he said as he slid out of the uncomfortable embrace. “Are you having funnnn?” “Yeah…I couldn’t bring myself to have those drinks I mentioned earlier, but I had a tea and the music is really good.” “Goodddd. Okay so listen,” he slurred. “What’s up?” “Matthew James Lent, my heart, is with another man and I need youuuu to tell himmm that I’m pregnant so he can come back to me.” Jake suppressed his laughter. “Is that so? How far along are you?” “I’m gonna have this baby any day now and he needs to be there for ussss.” “I’ll be sure to pass on the message.” “Thank youuuu,” he said as he threw his arms around the other man once again. Jake politely pushed himself away. “I’m gonna go smoke a cigarette and then probably head out to the airport.” “You wanna know a secret?” the brunette whispered. The man exhaled. “Sure, Jason.” “I think Max should’ve married youuuu.” “I think you must’ve put a little crack in your wine. I’m not gonna be somebody’s secret.” “He didn’t mean it like thatttt.” “Okay. Well I appreciate your opinion. Now you wanna know a secret?” “Mm hmmm.”

“I think Matt is so weak for you that he’s really struggling with not just giving everything up to be with you again. But he’s trying to hold out as long as possible in hopes that you get your shit together.”

Jason gasped. “I willllll I promiseeeee.”

***

“And I fucking did!” he shouted. “He was supposed to come back to me but instead he's a betraying asshole!”

Jake held his nose when the nauseating smell of Jason's breath reached him on the other side of the the room. “How's he betraying you?”

“We made vows, damnit!”

“Yeah, before you divorced him.”

“But even after all of that, he himself told me that if I got my shit together that we'd get back together!”

***

“You don’t get to just be an asshole and then come back when it’s convenient for you. I’ve had it, Jason. You seriously need to work on yourself before I’d ever consider being with you again. Until then, please don’t contact me.” Matt wanted to hang up then and there, but he couldn’t before he said the next part. “And don’t do anything stupid. Try not to be so clumsy…don’t put metal in the microwave…if you take an Uber with a sketchy driver, have pepper spray handy, okay?” At this point, the brunette was bawling his eyes out. “But Matt,” he pleaded. “I gotta go. Take care of yourself, Pumpkin.” Once he heard the dial tone, Jason buried his face into his pillow and cried himself to sleep.

***

“Jason, Matt called me that night and he said that he'd only consider getting back with you if you got your shit together. That was no promise.”

“It's still so fucked up!” the brunette sobbed. “I want him back!”

“Well...Matt is happy with Apollo so I can't help you with that.”

Jason grabbed the nearest sharp object and placed it to his own neck. “I can't live without him!”

Jake made a face. “Is that a spork?”

“Yes! And I'm not afraid to use it!”

The man chuckled. “Okay, Princess. Where is my jacket?” He turned and made his way to Jason's bedroom. Jake quickly sifted through the designer garments but when he didn't see his jacket, he decided that Jason's Versace coat would be an equal trade off. He grabbed it off of it's hanger. “This better be of equal or greater value,” he ordered as he made his way back to the living room.

The couch was empty and Jason was nowhere in sight.

“Jason?”

Jake heard faint shouting coming from the back of the house.

“Don't do it!” a stranger pleaded. “I'm sure you have a lot more to live for!”

“I don't!” Jason shouted back.

Jake rushed towards where the voices where emanating from and ended up on the fire escape yet again just to find Jason teetering on the edge of the guard rail.

“Jason...what...are you...doing?” Jake calmly asked.

“I don't want to live anymore, Jake. My family hates me, Matt hates me, Miss Vanjie went home first- I have nothing to live for!”

“Jason... nobody hates you and we were all upset that Miss Vanjie…” the man fought the urge to say it twice more, “when she went home. But dude, you live on the fifth floor, if you fall, that will kinda hurt.”

“I want it to hurt. I want to die,” he sniffled.

“But what about all the things you have to live for? Um...ugh...what the fuck do you like?”

“Nothing!”

“Pfft, I know you like sex. If you're dead, nobody will top you. Well, I mean, some people may be into that but it only gets them off and not you because ya know…” he made a cracking sound as he stuck out his tongue and rolled his eyes to the back of his head.

“I don't want anyone but Matt topping me anyway! And he won't anymore so fuck it!”

“Okay, well what about Max? He needs you.”

“Unlike me, he's happily married.”

Jake scoffed. “Dude, are you coming in or not? I'll call Matt right now and tell him that you're talking nonsense.”

“Good. Tell him that I'll always love him and I'll miss him,” Jason sniffled. “And…”

Jason trailed off as Jake checked his watch. “Look, I have a shoot in 20, can we wrap this up?”

The disheveled brunette took a deep breath. “Okay, I'm ready.”

Jake rolled his eyes and finally decided to grab the man and pull him back to safety. Jason's protests and flailing arms wafted the strong body odor directly into Jake's nostrils.

“Holy shit,” Jake said with a gag. “On second thought, just go ahead and jump. You already smell like a four day old corpse.”

“What do you think I was trying to do, asshole?!” Jason shouted as attempted to return to the guard rail but Jake firmly grasped his arm.

“Get your weird ass inside. I can't let you jump because cops would question me and if cops questioned me, I'd miss my photoshoot and if I miss my photoshoot, I'd lose money and if I lose money, I'd bring you back from the dead just to kill you again. Now go, get inside,” he ordered.

Jason grumbled under his breath.

“Okay, shall I call Matt and tell him that you smell like an extra from the walking dead?”

“No!”

“Then get your sour ass in the house!”

Like a toddler, Jason stomped and marched back into the home. Jake waited for the sour waft of air to fade before following the man.

“You seriously need to shower.”

“There's no point,” Jason groaned as he made his way back to couch. He flopped down, sending debris of trash and stale food around him.

“Whatever,” the other man retorted. “Do what you want, you won't get Matt back regardless. You smell like shit and you haven't even genuinely changed.”

Jason frowned.

“Bye, dude.”

After Jake made his exit, Jason sat up and grumbled as he wiped his eyes. He pushed himself off of the couch and entered the bathroom and turned the shower. The man peeled off his clothes and stepped underneath the hot cascade.

Jason's phone buzzed from the other room. When it went to voicemail, Sofia began to speak.

“Hey, Jason...it's your sister. I know it's been months since we've last spoken but...you need to come to Atlanta soon...it's Vinny.”

---

Jason's heart pounded against his chest as he slowly made his way up the limestone steps of the Atlantean mansion. He slowly entered and was instantly flooded with nostalgia when he saw the carrera marble pillars that he used to peak behind during hide and seek.

“Hello?” he called. When the man's voice echoed through the house, the sound of small pitter patter steps came rushing towards him.

Jason gasped. “Hi, Scout!” The man scooped up his nephew in his arms and kissed his cheek. “How are you, buddyyyy?”

“Good! How's you?”

“I'm good! Oh my God, you've grown so much.” Jason kissed his cheek again just as his sister rounded the corner.

“Hey, Jay,” she quietly greeted.

“Hey,” the man responded. “Where is he?”

“Downstairs...he refuses to go to the hospital.”

“What's wrong with him?”

“I don't know but he's always coughing and so weak all the time. I threw a party recently and he could barely keep up with the planning.”

Jason frowned. “How long has this been going on?”

“About a month.”

“Why didn't you call me?”

“Jay, you wanted nothing to do with either of us. We tried reaching out- you missed my wedding.”

The man turned away. “You guys broke my heart. You lied to me!”

“And we tried everything to fix it!”

“I lost Matt! There was no fixing that, Sofia!” The man quickly became emotional so Scout wrapped his arms around his uncle's neck.

“No cry. Bad mama!” he chastised.

Sofia scoffed and sucked back her own tears.

“Mio figlio!” Vinny excitedly greeted as he made his way to the foyer. He was pale and had clearly lost a significant amount of weight. His usually effervescent personality seemed to be toned down to a mild state.

Jason quickly rushed over to the man that he'd seen as a father figure for his entire life and threw his arms around him.

“Chokey!” Scout declared as he slide out of the embrace before teetering over to his mother.

“Vinny, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, mio figlio. I'm just so happy to see you.”

“No, you're not fine, Vinny,” Sofia retorted. “I called Jason because I know you're sick.”

“Mia figlia, having allergies hardly counts as being sick these days. The show must go on.”

“Allergies?” Jason asked.

Vinny grabbed Jason's shoulders. “Allergies,” he assured.

The brunette sighed in relief.

“Why would you need chemotherapy for allergies?” Sofia continued.

Vinny loudly exhaled. “My dear, you are mistaken. I've had no chemotherapy.”

“So...you're okay?” Jason asked again.

“Yes.”

He turned to his sister. “He's fine, Sofia.”

“If you want to buy his bullshit then that's on you. But remember that he was there when you signed your divorce papers so if you're going to continue to be mad at me then you have to be mad at him too.”

“I'm mad at both of you.”

Vinny frowned. “What can be done to fix this?”

Jason shrugged.

“I'll throw a party! A big celebration of you, mio figlio. I want you to see how you are appreciated.”

“Whatever,” the man grumbled.

“I'll get started on it right away,” he said excitedly. Vinny turned on his heel, obviously too quickly as evidenced by the way he became light-headed. The man desperately searched for the nearest wall to cling to for support.

“Are you okay?” Jason asked, clear worry in his tone.

Vinny closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths before answering. “I'm fine. Just a little dizzy.”

Jason frowned and looked at his sister who gave him the 'told you so’ look.

“Don't worry, mio figlio. I'll throw you the biggest party Atlanta has ever seen.”

“Vin, I don't want a party.”

“Senza Senso! You need a party! There will be cake and music and wine and guests! Maybe I can get Matthew to come.”

“I- ...you think he'd come?”

Sofia rolled her eyes.

“Maybe,” Vinny replied.

“And you promise you're okay?”

“Pinky promise,” the man assured.

“Okay,” Jason sighed. “I'll take a party.”

“Urrà!” This time, Vinny was careful to not move too fast as he made his way back to his office to make plans.

“If you can't see that he's sick then you're fucking blind,” Sofia said accusingly.

“He said that he's fine,” Jason practically hissed. “Now if you're done, I'm going to the Ritz.”

“Why are you staying at a hotel? You know our house is nicer than any hotel.”

“I know but-”

“Jason go bye bye?” Scout asked, expression a frown.

The man sighed. “No, Scouty I'll stay.”

The toddler cheered as he wiggled out of his mother's arms so that he could rush to his uncle. Jason picked him up and kissed his cheek.

“It'll be just like old times,” Sofia said.

Jason's mind instantly flooded with traumatic memories of staying in the house.

“Welcome home.”

>>>

#pearlet fanfiction #pearlet #omc verse #scorned bridges fic

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jeanjauthor · 4 years

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Gonna post the pics here and explain which ones I’d knock outta the running. My reasons are ONLY my own opinion, and I admit in advance that others have their right to their own opinions as well, and that whatever I say about what I like & dislike, all of these categories are still valid for those who actually do like them...even if some of them I am just utterly sick of by now, or have what I think are genuine reasons to want those categories gone.

Anyway, caveats over, on with the fun...which I will put behind a cut to save everyone’s dashboards!

Trapped Together. Only One Bed. Marriage Of Convenience. Fake Relationship.

...Of course they start this off with the hardest one to choose to get rid of, because I love all of these. I think, however...that “Only One Bed” and “Trapped Together” are pretty darn close. Marriage of Convenience is not the same thing as Fake Relationship--it’s an actual relationship with an actual committment at some level on both sides--so those both have to stay.

Only One Bed, that one presumes they actually like each other at least enough to travel together, so that’s a bonus, but Trapped Together doesn’t guarantee even a smidge of that; they’re forced together...

Damn this is hard. I really like the “oh no, only one bed, and we’ll have to share it!” trope...but Trapped Together could include that...plus it has more plot possibilities.

So I’m going to vote out Only One Bed, even though it goes against my plotline principles normally.

The next one is this:

Tortured/Scarred. Cinnamon Roll. Alpha. Playboy/Rake.

Tortured/Scarred needs more love, because there are a lot of people in the world who are indeed tormented & injured / unlovely / disabled. I do wish the disability aspect would stop being used as inspiration pr0n but people are getting better about that, at least.

Cinnamon Roll is a keeper, too. Truly good, or rather, Good™, characters need to be celebrated, protected, and promoted as an ideal role model...provided there’s someone in their lie who can and does keep an eye out (cynical eye) for Bad Things And Bad People™, because perpetual innocence is ridiculously unreal...but it’s 100% valid to have a hopeful heart and a kind nature.

As for Alpha and Playboy/Rake...I’m sick of both. And it’s difficult as to which one to toss out, because they both have their downsides. “Alpha Males” tend to be bullies and abusers and manipulative self-centered assholes. I’ve read far too many of those stories where they literally kidnap women and refuse to return them to their homes / families / homeworlds (scifi or fantasy), etc. But on the other hand, Playboys & Rakes perpetuate the “rich = right” and “money means you can grab them by the p***y, they just let you do it” mentality.

Right now, I am far too angry at T & Co, and the oligarchs keeping them in power. And I am also reminded that Nalini Singh (we have the same editor, squee!) has a FANTASTIC universe, the psy-changeling universe, where Alphas are actually kind, caring, loving, protective, and NOT bullies toward their own people, including their own mates. (Usually, but the few that were a bit bullying learned better!)

So I’m going to ditch the Playboy/Rake mindset, because we need to stop thinking the rich can get away with anything. I mean, have you SEEN 2020??

*ahem* Next...

Turgid. Moist. Thrust. Plunge.

Part of me really dislikes moist (though not Moist, the character from Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog) as a word...but on the other hand, lubrication is always a good thing to have. Turgid is a bit old-fashioned, but at the same time it is an accurate word. Thrust is a bit, well, stabby. Plunge makes me think of swimming pools, not lovemaking. (Or possibly stopped up toilets, ugh.)

Mkay, this is another difficult one, but...I think...rrrgh, had to change my mind. I think I’ll do away with moist, so long as “lubrication = a very good thing” is still implied somewhere in the descriptions for lovemaking.

Next!

Instalove. Roommates. Friends With Benefits. Just A Fling.

I’m not fond of Just A Fling, since it implies a lack of emotional & at least some mental intimacy. But Instalove also does the same, and it’s trying to tell readers that infatuation = abiding love...when that often isn’t the case.

I’ve lived long enough to learn that infatuation is great, but rarely turns into an abiding love, because we rarely teach how to turn infatuation into an abiding, long-lasting love.

For these reasons, I love Roommates and Friends With Benefits, because you already know (or are getting to know) each other’s bad habits and other potentially annoying quirks...and yet you fall in love anyway, while knowing those things. That sort of journey has a lot more of the patience, understanding, and willingness to compromise on all sides that makes long-term love a genuine thing.

Just A Fling implies they know each other a bit more, or can get to know each other a bit more as they fall for each other. And yes, Instalove IS a thing, I’m not deying that...but you have to make the follow-up efforts to turn it into lasting love. I think it has more of an incentive to make those efforts than Just A Fling does...and it’s possible for Just A Fling to fit under Instalove (though it’ll be a bit of a squeeze) so I’m ditching Just A Fling.

On to the next quartet:

Enemies To Lovers. Forbidden Love. Unrequited Love. Second Chance.

A couple toughies in this one. Forbidden love...we still don’t have marriage & relationship equality, so that one’s staying right where it is, as it’s an analogy of how love should triumph over bigotry.

I’m more torn on the other three. Second Chance...sometimes there are good reasons to not give someone a second chance. Abusers can be very charming, and make all sorts of sweet-talking promises. Sometimes, however, two people are just in the wrong stage of life to make a go of it.

Unrequited Love runs the risk of crossing over into the ‘tragically friendzoned’ bullshit which is only viewing the narrative from that one person’s perspective. This is not to say that unrequited love is only ‘friendzoned through rose-colored glasses’, which it isn’t, but it is potentially problematic, unless it’s just another take on Friends To Lovers.

Enemies To Lovers has a lot of potential, but it needs to be realistic potential. Not just a “Hey, let’s pit the Hulk versus Thor, get ‘em mad at each other for no other reason than action sequences & giggles!” sort of plotless nonsense, but a genuine “these two have more in common than they ever realized, AND their antipathy hasn’t crossed into unforgivable awfulness toward each other territory.”

I think that Second Chance is going to have to be set aside. It was either that or Unrequited Love, but while Friends To Lovers can cover Unrequited Love...I really, reallydon’t want to send the message that “it’s okay to reunite with your abusive ex.” ...See? I can’t even write it without striking that “okay” out. It’s NOT okay. It never will be.

Secret Relationship. Secret Billionaire. Secret Baby. Secret Royal.

I’m fine with Secret Relationships...unless it’s cheating/adultery, in which case oh hell no. (Remember, I am polyamory-friendly, but polyamory ≠ cheating!!) But otherwise it’s fine.

Secret Baby sets my teeth on edge a little, because one should know about babies. The body bearing it has the right to choose to continue bearing it or withdraw consent, because we SHOULD have more rights to bodily autonomy than goddamn corpses, but mostly it’s a case of there’d better be A Damn GOOD Reason™ for hiding this child, robbing them of a presumably loving parent’s love for X period of time.

I’m very much anti-oligarchy, but to be honest, I’m much more inclined to believe a secret billionaire has run away to live a normal life (such as the child of a manipulative asshole running away from association with all that) than I am to believe in Secret Royalty anymore. It’s just...it’s overdone. it’s like HOW MANY DUKES EXISTED in the Regency era?? It’s lost its believability potential that’s all. So out with the Secret Royal (for now)!

Mistaken Identity. Amnesia. In Disguise. In Peril.

Amnesia. Kicking that one out the door right away. It’s overdone, it doesn’t work the way it’s most often displayed, and I just know too much about the actual medical condition to enjoy it.

Mind you, pretending to have Amnesia is fine! That’s “In Disguise” right then & there, lol...but no, the other three tropes are far better than that old rag. *tosses it away!*

Duke. Cowboy. Tycoon. Athlete.

...You’d think that from my rant above regarding Secret Royals, I’d kick out Duke as a category. I won’t. I just want to see Dukes (and other nobility titles) in other eras than just Regency and/or modern. So overdone in those eras, but not in others.

Athletes...I’m not into sports. I’m not a sporty-sport type. I don’t read those books so I don’t know how overdone the tropes are, though I’ve only noticed them coming into prominence in fanficdom in the last ten to fifteen years, with the HP fandom being big on quidditch-based fanfic stories.

Now, Cowboys are a bit overglamorized, but...they’re working class types, and if you get some actual honest work-on-the-farm or work-on-the-ranch scenes in there, and it’s believable? That’s still okay.

Tycoons are overused, too...but unlike Billionaires, you can be a Tycoon in a lot of different ways. Sometimes via money, sometimes via some sort of monopoly--like the company that owns the company store, town, people, etc. Still...being a tycoon means you (or your family) has done something to monopolize money, business, property, etc...and I despise the oligarchy. So since most tycoon stories don’t talk about paying employees above a livable wage, or constantly improving the living conditions in the company-owned town, etc...fuq ‘em. *punts them outta town, covered in tar & feathers*

(I never said I’d be consistent, just that these are my opinions per category group. I’m evaluating every quartet solely against its fellow members, even if I reference other groups or categories.)

Flick. Pierce. Spear. Breach.

...Unless these are in reference to combat, only Flick should remain, because the others all make me think of combat more than lovemaking. However...that being said, we’re only supposed to discard just the one, so I think I’ll get rid of Breach.

Why Breach? The bullshit misogyny of virginity culture, and the absolute anatomical awfulness of writers who don’t know where the goddamn hymen is.

...i could go into a very long rant about where the hymen is, what it’s shaped like, why it doesn’t have to be torn and spurt oodles of visible blood when you’re making love for the first time, blah blah blah--and why if you do get that happening, you 1. haven’t taken care of your partner’s needs AT ALL, and 2. clearly have never heard of lubrication, and 3. ARE SEVERELY INJURING YOUR PARTNER, wtf is sexy about THAT??--but I’ll digress and simply say that virginity is utter bullshit, patriarchal and misogynistic BULLSHIT, and it needs to go away!

Kthxbai!

Blackmail. Revenge. Bully. Kidnapped.

...Can we do away with all of these?

...No?

...Just get rid of one only?

...Dammit.

Ummm...if these are -between- the love interests, blackmail has to have a really good plot reason behind it, but there are a few conceivable ones. Revenge, too. Gotta have a good reason behind it.

Bullying is not something I care for at all, got that too much as a kid, and that shit HURTS. It takes a lot to forgive a bully all the horrible things they did, and if it’s a case of “they’re only bullying you because they love you and this is how they show it” that shit is NASTIER, because it’s the “you should put up with being abused because it’s how he shows he loves you.” OH HELL NO.

Kidnapped...nope. That’s the Bad version of Alpha bullshit I don’t like either. Though as with Blackmail, there has to be a solid reason AND there has to be some atonement for the kidnapping, PLUS TIME AWAY FROM EACH OTHER, and time spent getting to know each other in a non-Stockholm Syndrome non-Lima Syndrome sort of way...

I think we’ll get rid of Bullying, even though part of me really wants to ditch Kidnapping...if only because of the message listed above is NOT the message that should be absorbed by anyone.

Pirates. Medieval. Highlander. Regency.

Medieval and Highlander both still have a BROAD range of eras they can choose from, literal hundreds of centuries, plus Medieval can mean much more than just the British Isles for its setting...and you could have a Highlander traveling to Hungary or Italy or wherever.

Regency on the one hand is overdone and has been overdone quite a lot. I’d love to see something else, BUT at the same time I acknowledge it’s a much-beloved juggernaut. Just...tone down the numbers of Dukes and Earls for the love of population distribution statistics, and I’ll be much happier!

Pirates...are kinda fun on the one hand...but also an over-glamorization of horrible people doing horrible things for a living, on the other. I’d only keep Pirates as a category if you PROMISED to do some non-European pirates...and since that’s not likely to happen... *flicks the Pirates off their own plank*

(I hate having to do that as I’m a proud Birate, but it’s not quite the same thing, so...oh well!)

Dragons. Wolves. Vampires. Bears.

*kicks Vampires off the plank as well*

Wolves are almost overdone as a trope, but vampires jumped the shark tank long ago, so I’m sure they’ll be fine after walking the plank, right?

There still aren’t enough Dragon stories, Wolves may be a little overdone with the ABO stuff, but there are so many other possibilities that could be explored, and Bears are an excellent example of exploring other shapeshifter types. (No Dragons in Nalini Singh’s psy-changeling books, but there ARE changeling wolves and changeling bears, and remember, they have awesome Alphas who are actually NOT douchebags!)

Needs more Changecats or Werecats or whatever, but that’s just me.

Sexy Space. Sexy Time Travel. Sexy Apocalypse. Sexy Fantasy.

Ditch the Sexy Apocalypse. There’s no such thing. It’s an oxymoron. An apocalypse is the opposite of sexy, because everything is being destroyed.

There’s plenty of Sexy Fantasy, but there’s always room for more. There’s almost as much Sexy Time Travel, and plenty of eras & places left to be explored. And there is not enough Sexy Space stories. (Tho’ I’m working on that!)

But ditch the Apocalypse stuff. It’s just not sexy at all.

Royal & Lionheart. Beauty & Beast. Celebrity & Bodyguard. Warrior & Bard.

Not enough Warrior & Bard stories, definitely keeping that one!

Beauty & Beast is a bit overdone, but it sends a good message about how external beauty standards and external beauty tropes are overrated.

However...I’ll confess I’m not familar with Royal & Lionheart. If it means royalty and the strong right arm that defends them, the head of the armies falling in love with the head of state...then I’m fine with that, not enough of that. (Seriously, this is the first time I’ve heard of this one.)

So I guess we’ll ditch Celebrity & Bodyguard...because that’s 1. an unequal balance of power between employer and employee, and 2. falling for the person you’re trying to protect means your thoughts are not going to stay on the job nearly enough of the time. That could put your client in serious danger...and that’s a trope I don’t want to encourage as “emulation-worthy.”

Slow Burn. Angst. Fluff. Mutual Pining.

Slow Burn can be frustrating if not done right...but I love Fluff, and Mutual Pining has some serious Comedy of Errors potential. Seriously, who doesn’t love a good comedy? (So long as there’s a good resolution, of course.)

I’ve had too rough a year, however, to want Angst around right now. It can come back later, but...sorry, Angst, there’s the door. *gently shows Angst to the door* Come back in half a year, mkay?

...

That’s the last of the trope groupings! Feel free to play with this one yourselves.

#tw #brief mention of abusive ex tropes #mention of abuse #mostly it's just discussing why I dislike a certain trope for Reasons™

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