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pillowfluffs · 6 years

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Best Friend!Baekyun

Part 1 of 2

genre: fluff

pairing: Baekhyun x Reader (female)

Part 2

Byun Baekhyun. One of the best people you’ve ever encountered in your life. Ever since your mothers met each other while dropping the both of you off at daycare, a friendly relationship bloomed and continued to present day, you just turned 24 and he just turned 25.

(It’s fate, you both have the same birthday). You woke up to the sun shining brightly through your white curtains after a long night of partying and celebrating with both of your guys’ friends. You feel a slight pounding in your head as the effect of alcohol from last night’s shots kicking back in. You rubbed your head, yawning, and reached over to the drawers next to your bed and pulled out some Advil. After taking the Advil, you laid back down and pulled your phone out from under your pillow. Notifications of “Happy Birthday Y/N!” messages from relatives overseas filled your phone. Text messages and snaps from other friends made your phone light up every 2 minutes. You rolled out of bed after scrolling through your phone for a few minutes and started your day. Today was the first you were 24. A month or two later and all the schools would be on break. You were brushing your teeth, “blasting” music from your phone, thinking back to some funny memories from last night until you got a text.

BB: “GM”

Of course, it was Baek, he always texted you good morning and good night. It was an unofficially made precedent. But you never complained ;)

YOU: “gm”

You put down your phone and continued on with your morning routine; brushing your hair, getting dressed for whatever errand or objective you set yourself, but for the first time in forever, you had nothing. You went back to your room to water your (almost dead) plants when your phone vibrated in your hand.

BB: “Yo, are you doing anything today?”

YOU: “for once, no”

YOU: “why?”

BB: “same”

BB: “do you wanna get breakfast?”

YOU: “sure. where tho?”

BB: “mm”

BB: “ooh, ik this new place that opened up and i saw some pretty good reviews about it”

YOU: “okay”

BB: “then pick you up in 15”

You turned off your phone and a smile grew on your face. As long as you’ve known Baekhyun and no matter how many sides of him you’ve seen, good or bad, there was always something about him that attracted you to him. The way he smiled and laughed and said things just made you want to hug him. Never once would you hang out with him and not be in a bad mood. Unless he was in a bad mood, which was rare-ish. The next thing you know, you’re in your closet picking out a cute, but casual outfit. So many choices, what to do what to do. Was it windy today? Chilly? Hot? Cloudy? Should you dress fancy? Or casual? Ugh, you wished Baek told you about the cafe more. You pulled out your phone to check the weather and saw that 7 minutes had already passed. SHI(O)T. You quickly pulled out your classic black jeans and your new baby blue short sleeved shirt. You looked into your full body length mirror and fixed your hair. You grabbed your wallet and waited by the door until Baek texted you his presence. A few minutes passed when you were just scrolling through your phone when you got a text.

BB: “here”

BB: “betch”

You clicked on the message notification and went to messages. As you were about to text your sassy clap back remark, he texted again.

BB: “jkjk pls dont kill me”

And there it was again. His usual funny charm that never failed to make you smile. You quickly replied while slipping on your white vans

YOU: “B*TCHH”

YOU: “coming”

You grabbed your keys form your key basket and left your apartment. You went down the stairs from your apartment to see the familiar white Cherokee. He was on his phone when he glanced up as you were walking towards the car. He instantly smiled, waved, and rolled down the winder.

“Get in loser, we’re going to breakfast,” he laughed. “Good morning.”

You just gave him your classic what the.. Look while getting in.

“Hi,” you said. You saw that he was wearing the same type of clothes.. Actually, he was wearing black jeans, black vans, a white shirt below with a blue sweater with his sleeves rolled up and a watch. You just focused ahead as he drove. Smiling and looking out the window, you did your occasional glance at your phone. You turned back and started talking when you feel yourself calm down a little.

“So how far is this new cafe?” you finally broke the silence.

“Mm, not too far, it’s a few blocks away from the company,” one hand on the steering wheel, the other rubbing his chin. Their new song universe was playing softly in the background.

“Have fun last night?” he smiled at you.

“Yeah, it was bigger than I thought, honestly,” you looked back outside, passing by the familiar streets. “I woke up with a small headache though.. Did you have a hangover?”

“Surprisingly, no,” he shook his head.

“Lucky,” you pouted. Baekhyun just smiled to himself from how cute you were unintentionally being. It was the same for him too. Ever since that one time he saw you asleep on your textbook when he dropped by, just the way you looked made his heart flutter. He always admired how hardworking and studious you were. He never thought he would ever fall for his best friend like those cliche stories and movies, but here he was, falling for you more and more as time went by. Oh how he wished he could just reach over and hold your hand, but he couldn’t. He knew you didn’t reciprocate his feelings. You confirmed it yourself when he asked you if you were interested in anyone. Of course you said no though, how could you confess then and there? Especially with how shy you were sometimes. But little did he know that you did reciprocate the feelings, just as much. Plus, he knew that there was a long list of other guys that he found out were interested in you, but you never paid attention to them. Of course you didn’t. You had some high standards when it came to guys. Heck, they were so high that it even made Baekhyun doubt his looks. You reached for the radio and turned up the music. Universe played louder at Baek’s verse and you just silently sang along with him. He glanced over and smiled, his heart beat faster in his chest. He sang out and tried his best to sing enough so you would sing out too. Even though you didn’t admit it to yourself, he always knew you had a lovely voice. It was always gentle and soft and ohwefouwefh he just wanted to hug you and squish you. You made him so soft.

“I’m guessing you like our new album?” He raised his voice over the music slightly

“I love it,” you smiled. As the song ended, you finally arrived at the cafe and Baek parked right in front.

“Shilla,” you looked up at the sign and looked into the cafe. There was barely anyone there but it’s understandable since it just opened like half an hour ago.

“Ready to go in?” Baekhyun pointed to the doors locking his car. You looked over and nodded. You both walked forward together towards the entrance.

“Hey!” Baekhyun turned towards you, surprised.

“What?”

“We look like a couple,” he laughed and gestured at both of your outfits.

“Yeah..” you said quietly. A blush slowly glowing onto your face.

He opened the door for you and walked in. The cool breeze of the air conditioning chilled you a bit, but it was okay.

“Let’s sit here,” he gestured to the table further in. “I can go order for both of us. They have your favorite here.”

“Okay,” you sat with your arms folded in your lap, you were a bit chilly. “Wait, but I need to pay,” you were standing up.

“No, no, no, no, no,” he came back and sat your back down. “Breakfast is on me today,” he smiled his signature smile that you prayed would never fade.

“Oh, are you sure?”

“Yes, now sit,” he pointed downwards. You saw him turn to walk back towards the entrance but turned left to the register. You sat there and was on your phone, snapping your streaks and scrolling through Instagram. You were feeling colder and colder until you feel something warm wrap around your shoulders. You looked back up to see Baekhyun standing behind you, hands on your shoulders as he wrapped one of his jackets around you.

“Oh, thank you,” you put your arms through the sleeves.

“No, problem, I noticed you were cold when we walked in.” He went back to the register and walked back to the table with two hot drinks.

“I got your favorite,” he set down the drinks and napkins and sat across from you.

“They have all my favorites here,” you smiled “Both food and person,” you thought to yourself. “This might just be my new favorite cafe.” You smiled and brought your drink to your lips. The refreshing smell of your latte filled your nose. “Mmm, this is so good,” you smiled.

“This is definitely my new favorite.”

You paused for a brief moment until you finally spoke up.

“How come you don’t have a schedule today?” you asked curiously. “I figured since you recently had this album released, and considering you’re one of the top groups in Korea, the last thing you should be doing is nothing.”

“Well..” and just from the tone of his voice, you knew he did something he shouldn’t have. “That’s the thing..”

“What is?” You stared at him. “Baek?” You lowered your head to get into his line of sight.

“I technically do have a schedule.. And it’s the busiest one of the year,” he rubbed the back of his neck.

Your eyes grew big at this. You knew how much trouble he would get in when he got back, especially since he did this last year too and you didn’t hear from him for a few weeks.

“Baekhyun, you shouldn’t have done this. Oh my gosh,” your mouth was agape in shock.

“But, I wanted to be with you,” he put on his puppy face. The face he knew was your ultimate weakness. “Plus, our manager doesn’t really know I’m gone. The guys are covering for me,” You could’ve melted right then and there but you stood your ground.

“Wha- But they’re not dumb enough to not ignore your absence. Plus, we were together last night!”

‘But I wanted to be alone, Y/N!” He sighed. “Please, just don’t worry about me and my soon to come punishment. just-“

You were taken back a bit at his sudden exclamation.

“Why, though?” You cut him off. “We see each other often, but today, you shouldn’t have ditched your schedule.”

“Because Y/N…” He paused, staring into your eyes.

~~~~~

gif not mine!

I hope you all enjoyed! and I’ll be posting part 2 tomorrow around this same time

Masterlist

#byun baekhyun #baekhyun #exo imagine #exo scenarios #kpop #pillowfluffs #exo fluff

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anxiety-trademark · 3 years

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The week in review:

Raw 10/05 NXT 10/07 NXT UK 10/08 Smackdown 10/09 + Main Event 10/08

Raw:

“This Asuka reign has been spectacular thus far,” d e b a t a b l e

Is Asuka continuing her feud with Zelina? If so, why? If not, why is this 6 woman match happening? Just spinning your wheels some more?

It’s been an interesting experience watching Dana grow throughout the years. Also nice flip by Nattie off of Dana’s headscissors takedown.

Love to see Dana and Mandy matching colors. Tag teams matching gear is my jam. Next is a theme song/name.

Lovely delayed double suplex by Dandy.

Small mistake in Mandy nearly falling over, but I mostly want to compliment the slide her boots did against the mat lmao. That was probably unintended, but looked super smooth.

I actually like Mandy now that she’s not imitating a stripper, but I’d really appreciate it if she could learn new trash talk that isn’t just, “who do you think you are,” repeated ad nauseam.

I don’t watch Main Event, but they should consider having Mandy and Dana wrestle more on there if they don’t already. Those are 2 that can use the consistent practice.

There’s so many minor things Natalya does to keep matches together with greener women. She deserves more respect.

Man these women work incredibly well together. Asuka, Nattie, Dana, Lana, Mandy... so cohesive. Loved that entire ending sequence from the moment Lana and Asuka tagged in. Lana has really increased her speed as well.

I am here to dole out positive praise for the blondes that nobody gives any credit to. Remembering where Dana was in 2016, Lana was in 2017, or even Mandy was in 2018, and seeing them all now? They get my applause. The midcard on Raw is entertaining, sue me. Fun match.

pppfffftttttt love how Zelina just slowly slinks outta the ring like, “yeahhhh have fun with that, this ain’t my fight peace.”

Alright ngl, I am now starting to get sad that Lana is getting rekt nearly every week. rip. First match of the night btw and the commentators are losing their desk lmao.

Does KO have to spell out everything happening in wrestling? Sir I actually pay attention to the stories y’all be telling me. Can I get a condensed version?

“He’s everywhere,” Alexa is creepy and compelling, I’m gonna keep singing her praises til she gives me a reason not to.

I personally just hope Fiend uses new gloves for every new victim, what with covid and all.

“Bury a body together in the woods,” SIR.

I like that Alexa is kept separate from Bray and is solely attached to Fiend. I know that’s going to change, but for now, I like that line being drawn in the sand.

Omg he shed tears. Whew.

Why y’all allergic to showcasing Bianca against people who I fucking recognize lmao.

Again, I know she’s a college graduate. I know she’s smart on some fucking level. Telling me why the sky is blue (cept not really as it just appears that way) AIN’T IT THOUGH.

Put her in a match, that’s where she needs the most work. Jesus.

Oh good we get to hear Nia’s music on the way to the ring. She has the superior theme.

Nia body checking Ruby in the corner. I felt that.

I like Shayna’s joint manipulation, I only wish she’d wear down her opponents before she started in on it, cuz it drastically slows down the pacing of the match. There’s a spot for it if you get the momentum of the match going first, but she almost always just jumps straight into this.

Ruby getting rekt. What Riott Squad need is a good showing. Not to be damn near demolished. I doubt anyone actually expected them to win this match, but come on.

At least Shayna sold the tornado ddt well.

Meh could’ve been a better showing for RS. Kind of disappointing. Liv didn’t even use any offense to break the Kirifuda Clutch, just yelled dramatically af. Tears galore.

Highlight: Seeing Lana/Mandy/Dana improve & work cohesively with veterans in Nattie & Asuka

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NXT:

Isn’t nxt supposed to be the brand that hides a performer’s weakness? Why does Ember Moon have a mic in the middle of the ring? Have her do a quick interview in the back, or better yet wrestle. Hello??

Don’t thank them, they are your coworkers, and only one of them even said welcome back. sigh.

GIRL I’M SHOCKED THEY LET YOU TALK ON THE MIC TOO like for what reason???

This is why Ember Moon will never be a champion on the main roster jfc. At least she can get away with being nxt champ if she refrains from speaking.

Well damn I was actually interested in Rhea’s promo, thanks a lot Raquel smh.

Io’s like “...nah, I’m good right here.”

Io is a woman of few words, but they are always flawlessly spoken and drenched in logic. Still a huge fan of her as champion.

Storytime. Becky Lynch has named 2 people as potential break out stars that could reach (close to) the heights she has reached. Sonya Deville was one, whom I believe Becky was right on the money with, and Toni Storm was the other. Now I don’t see whatever the hell Becky sees in Toni, but damn it if she was right about Sonya, I want her to be right about Toni as well. So I hope this heel turn actually brings the fire, decent acting, and passable promos from her.

Toni has a swagger you can’t teach; she has an aura and confidence to her. There are just some pieces that have been missing. We’ll see though, I’ll give her a clean slate to win me over.

*The Garganos receive a gift* No.

I kind of like that there’s an unspoken agreement between Raquel and Dakota that Dakota is the star who should win the title, with no lingering feelings of animosity or resentment between them.

Anyway Dakota you lost to Io, plz lol.

*The Garganos see potential in Indi Hartwell* No.

I hate Shotzi’s entrance and dialogue so damn much lmao. She’s so annoying, I’m not sorry. I’ll give her props in the ring where I see fit, but her personality is such a turn off to me.

Such a short match that I have nothing to say about it. Good for Shotzi gaining some momentum. Still waiting to see where Xia Li goes with these losses amounting.

Cool one of the best themes has been changed :/ rip Ember’s og theme.

Sloppy, sloppy attempt at a standing crucifix by Ember. oof.

Ember is short but she can sure jump high, this is true.

Ember plz sell.

Jeeze I nearly forgot how good Ember’s suicide dive is. One of the best, truly.

Great bump onto the floor by Rhea.

Flat landing by Dakota. Bravo. Love how Dakota bumps Rhea’s bench press.

No excuse for Dakota not tagging in when Ember got the tag. Awkward.

Looked more like a modified flatliner rather than a uranage, but sure.

Love watching Dakota and Rhea work together. They have great chemistry.

LOVE Dakota’s Kairopractor. One of my favorite moves in nxt.

Great save by Raquel, great ddt taken by Raquel.

Sloppy “powerbomb” from Ember to Dakota... that’s a yikes. Ember indeed has ring rust. Eclipse is still a thing of beauty though, so there’s that.

I just want to say, I really like Rhea as a babyface and I hope wwe doesn’t turn her heel when she moves to the MR.

Highlight: Dakota & Rhea working together is always a treat

---

NXT UK:

Tell me why the beginning of Dani’s theme reminded me of White Wedding by Billy Joel? The lack of lighting in her entrance does her song a disservice.

Really like Nina’s theme... irritating how they cut off Amale’s theme so quickly to introduce her, though.

HAHA Xia tried kipping up out of the leg scissors and she got popped on the midsection.

Lovely escape...? Alright well, fill the dead air with meaningless comments I guess. No, don’t pipe in applause for that.

Twisting her arms in reverse and then forward accomplished nothing.

I appreciate Dani’s underrated strength.

Decent reverse suplex by Nina.

Deadweight suplex by Dani. Nice.

Amale is... abysmally green.

Took a beautiful German suplex, though.

Do not like Xia’s finisher.

This match wasn’t a mistake, but man talk about lower card.

Much like I did with Toni Storm, all I see when I look at Piper now, is when she cried during the match with KLR lmao. Round of applause for KLR making all of her opponents cry kekekek.

“[KLR] better watch what she says, or else..” or else what? More of y’all gonna cry in her direction? oof your champ is HEAD AND SHOULDERS above everyone else on that roster, plz.

Sure she’s held the title for a year cuz of the pandemic, but if we remove all of that time UK spent isolated, she should still hold that title for a year minimum. Whenever someone wants to exhibit possessing the full package she has, they can step up. Even on the mic, KLR is untouchable.

Lol y’all can waltz out pissy all you want. I laugh.

“We've got witches that can't cast spells, Valkyries that can't fly, and these two can't even get along long enough to challenge me. And here she is, the worst of them all, the ultimate letdown... a piper that plays to my tune.” LMFAOOO. This is such a good promo, I can’t.

Knowing NXT, they’ll throw them in a battle royal to decide Kay Lee’s next opponent. Should run a tournament though.

KLR makes that title prestigious, goodbye.

Highlight: Fantastic KLR promo

---

Smackdown:

Alright real talk, why did Sasha get a title shot here? Why would Bayley give it to her without a struggle when she damn well knows Sasha could easily be the one to take it from her? When was it even accepted by Bayley?

Tbh I kind of hate this feud unless they’re in the same room/arena together. They work magic together, truly, but all of the inbetween stuff was garbage.

Love how Sasha just wants to beat the crap out of Bayley. Solid stuff.

Lol Bayley goes to leave lololol.

These are some clean counters and roll throughs. Always give props to Sasha for her counters.

See, cool, Sasha and Becky’s hiac match was set up with a chair, too... cept they had a great match for 15 mins and then brawled all over the arena. This could’ve all been set up SO much better. Then again tbf, it doesn’t even make sense for Bayley to accept this match with her to begin with, so I get the intentional dq as quickly as possibly on Bayley’s behalf. Would’ve been better if a gm had set this match up instead.

Great acting by Sasha.

How long til KO just pops Bliss across the face? No I’m kidding, wwe would never do that. Setting fire to someone, on the other hand...

Nothing about this promo felt genuine to me; the delivery was subpar.

When does Alexa receive an upgrade from ‘supportive mistress’ to ‘queen that helps fuck up Fiend’s victims’? I do appreciate them taking their time with her arc, it’s rare to see them do such a slow burn and not drop the ball with it.

Highlight: Sasha’s aggression in the ring

---

*BONUS*

Main Event:

The sheer hatred I have for Peyton’s theme. Awful.

Peyton vs Billie matches reminds me of the type of stuff I used to skip back in the late 2000s.

You watch best friends Sasha/Bayley, and you see some innovative, impactful moves. You watch best friends Becky/Charlotte, and you see 2 people beating the absolute shit out of each other with vitriol. You watch best friends Billie/Peyton, and you see 2 people who are afraid of hurting one another :/

Nice roll through pin by Billie.

Positive: there’s no crowd to boo them.

Just noticed the bottom row of monitors are behind the barricade, and I just want to know why tf they exist lmao.

Oh perfect, the second I began to regret turning this on, it ended. Okay anyway.

---

*NXT shined the brightest. Love how they utilized their women’s division, even if some of it was a hit or miss. Also love seeing Dakota and Rhea work together.

#wwe #issa review #feel free to ignore these #cuz who tf cares lesbihonest #today's props goes to:#dakota kai

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shotguns-and-socialites · 6 years

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Chapter Preview: Magic

“Magic is the art and science of causing change to occur in conformity with will.” -- Magick in Theory and Practice, Aleister Crowley

The moment when someone first uses their magical powers is, for the lucky few who ever get to, one of the most amazing events in their life. It always begins with them zoning out; totally enthralled with the task at hand. Often, they don’t even notice what’s happening at first, unaware of their new powers until someone brings it to their attention. Afterwards, they carry with them a pair of Words, pieces of magical knowledge that can be combined to create magical effects. As they increase in level, this vocabulary also improves.

Nouns & Verbs

Each magical word is either a noun or a verb. Nouns are things that can be acted upon, and verbs are processes that act upon them. Thus, animal and time are valid nouns, since they can be acted upon, but discovery and wound are not, since they are the result of processes and not things themselves. Similarly, learn and destroy are valid verbs, but not rename or wait, since these are not processes that act on their subjects.

Specificity

Each word has a specificity, a measure of how many different effects it allows for. When calculating an effect's level, the most general of the two words increases the level; very general words increase the level by 2, general words increase it by 1, specific words don't change the level, and very specific words decrease it by 1. Here's an example of some nouns and verbs by specificity:

Nouns

Very general: nightmare, time, space, substance, magic, mind

General: human, animal, plant, technology, undeath, memory, emotion

Specific: metal, anger, ennui, sorrow, fire, water, earth, wind, electric, poison, elemental, fae

Very Specific: self, cat, ocean, infection, mountain, food, data, sound, light

Verbs

Very general: summon, make, alter, borrow, prevent, control

General: enhance, weaken, shape, copy, send, switch

Specific: heal, learn, destroy, simulate

Very Specific: build, move, cut, crush, pierce, document, chill, burn, dry, taste

Adjudicating Magic

While players are mostly concerned with which magic words their character's know, the GM has to decide which effects they can generate with these words. While every rule in this book is optional, the GM should feel especially welcome to custom-tailor magic in their campaigns to match their own style. Generally, these rules are for magical effects generated by players. Characters under the GM's control have whatever magical powers make for an interesting story, and avoiding their harmful effects often depends more on skill checks than attack rolls.

Magic in the World

Within the world of Shotguns & Socialites, there are three major factors affect magical effects. The first, and most important, is intention. A person who hopes to evoke a magical effect must have a clear and specific idea of what they hope to accomplish. The second is location. The objects involved with the magic must be “at hand.” When affecting humans, that means their exact location must be known and within 20 yd. With large things, like mountains and buildings, the distance is allowed to be greater. With parts of highly structured things, like internal organs or computer parts, the part itself does not have to be visible, as long as enough of the super structure is visible to make its location obvious. The evoker is always visible to themself, since they experience themself in the first person. The third factor is sensation. All magic produces noticeable and distinctively magical sounds or lights, and usually both. Often, it also produces strange smells, or causes people in the area to hallucinate weird tastes or touches.

The Process

A power requires a noun and a verb. The process differs slightly if each word is spoken by a different character.

One Character

A character can use two words as a full round action. The process is as follows:

The player describes what they’d like to accomplish.

The GM tells them what the power level, TN, and words would be.

The players can negotiate here.

If the power level is greater than their level, they cannot do it.

Otherwise, they may spend that much PP (or more, up to their level) and a full round action to try and evoke the power.

They roll a Power check, with a bonus equal to the extra PP they spent.

If they pass, the effect happens.

If they pass by 10 or more, this is a critical success; the effect happens especially well. The magic “knows” what the characters goals are, and tries to help them.

If they fail, nothing happens.

If they fail by 10 or more, this is a critical failure; roll on the magic critical failure table.

Two Characters

Using a single word is also full-round action. The faster character must delay their turn until the slower character goes; they take their turns at the same time. The process is as follows:

The player describes what they’d like to accomplish.

The GM tells them what the power level and words would be. The PP cost is equal to the power level, and the TN is equal to 10 plus twice the the power level.

The players can negotiate here.

If the power level is greater than their level, they cannot do it.

If they can actually use the power, and the other player agrees, the player whose turn is first must wait until the other player’s turn.

On the second player’s turn, if they both choose to, they both take full-round actions at the same time, and each spend PP (each player can choose to spend additional PP for a bonus to just their roll.)

They each roll a Power check.

If they both succeed, the effect happens.

In this case, if either rolled a critical success, the effect is enhanced, and if they both did, the effect is extremely enhanced.

If they both fail, nothing happens.

In this case, each of them that rolled a critical failure rolls on the magical critical failure table

If one succeeds and one fails, compare the margin of success to the margin of failure.

If the margin of success is greater than or equal to the margin of failure, the effect happens.

Otherwise, nothing happens.

In this case, there are never critical successes or failures.

Effect Guidelines

There are nearly infinite different effects magic can have, but here are some common ones. If the players come up with an idea not covered in this list, the GM should wing it; remember, “Yes, but...” is always more fun than “No!”.

Create

Sometimes, characters want to use magic to create non-magical, non-living items, or emulate their effects. Creating an item temporarily, or creating the effects of an item, is less difficult than creating an item permanently. In either case, the power level depends on the cost of the item. Permanent items are clearly magical, and can be dispelled by dispelling magic, so most people won't accept them unless they're desperate. Finally, items whose effects are similar to an effect described in this chapter should just use that effect instead of create.

Temporary Items

1st Level: Up to $1

2nd Level: Up to $16

3rd Level: Up to $81

4th Level: Up to $256

5th Level: Up to $625

6th Level: Up to $1,296

7th Level: Up to $2,401

8th Level: Up to $4,096

9th Level: Up to $6,561

10th Level: Up to $10,000

Permanent Items

5th Level: Up to $1

6th Level: Up to $2

7th Level: Up to $4

8th Level: Up to $7

9th Level: Up to $10

10th Level: Up to $16

Examples:

Brent and his travel companions are stranded on a desert island. Food is plentiful, but Brent is to injured to eat, so he decides to cure his hunger magically. The GM decides that this essentially emulates the effects of a feeding tube, which costs about $800 a meal. The GM decides that it's a 6th level effect. Brent's player chooses the words heal human, so the effect level is increased by 1, since the most general word is human. Brent spends 7 PP and makes a TN 24 Power check.

Kyo wants to extinguish the fire that has broken out in her cabin. The GM decides that this emulates the effects of a fire extinguisher, which costs about $18, which they round down to a 2nd level effect. Kyo's player chooses destroy fire, so the effect level is not changed, since both words are specific. Kyo spends 2 PP and makes a TN 14 Power check.

Damage

Damage lowers a character's or object's HP. The effect level depends on the amount of damage dealt. Dealing damage to a character always requires an attack roll, as does dealing damage to an object held by or containing a character. Usually, the character pantomimes the attack to help channel the harmful intent of the magic. Some attacks are “all or nothing;” the damage is doubled, but it only lowers HP if it is enough to reduce the target to 0 HP or less. All or nothing attacks usually don't have damage types; they are just numerical comparisons. Normal attacks, however, usually have all their damage changed to a single type of damage, depending on the words chosen. Explosion damage raises the level by 1.

Damage

1st Level: Up to weapon damage + 1

2nd Level: Up to weapon damage + 1d4

3rd Level: Up to weapon damage + 1d6

4th Level: Up to weapon damage + 1d8

5th Level: Up to weapon damage + 1d10

6th Level: Up to weapon damage + 1d12

7th Level: Up to weapon damage + 3d4

8th Level: Up to weapon damage + 3d6

9th Level: Up to weapon damage + 3d8

10th Level: Up to weapon damage + 3d10

Examples:

Avi has sneaked into a chicken factory, and wants to destroy the machine that identifies male chicks and grinds them up. Since the only applicable words he has is destory technology, the GM tells his player that it would have to be an all or nothing attack. He readies his ancient castanets and chooses to increase the damage by 10, which the GM determines is about the same as increasing it by 3d6. This make it an 8th level effect, which is increased by 1 since technology is a general word. Avi spends 9 PP and makes a TN 28 Power check. If he succeeds, he then makes an attack roll, and if the attack hits, he rolls the damage, adds 10, and then doubles it. If this damage is higher than the machine's HP, the machine is totally destroyed; otherwise, nothing happens.

Indy is fleeing from government agents. He wants to cause an avalanche to block his pursuer's path and possibly kill them. He decides to use the words move mountain to do it. Given the amount of snow, the GM decides that they will deal an additional 2d12 damage, which is about the same as 3d8 damage. Thus, its effect level would be 9th. However, since it affects several targets and has a convenient side effect, the GM decides that it's effect level is actually 11th. Indy's player asks if he can take disadvantage on the attack roll to lower the level by 1, and in this case, the GM agrees. Since both words are very specific, the level is lowered by an additional 1. Indy readies his dream cleaver, spends 9 PP, and makes a TN 28 Power check. If he succeeds, he then makes three attack rolls at disadvantage, one for each vehicle, and if the attack hits, he rolls the damage and adds 2d12. The GM decides that all of this damage is water damage, and any vehicles dealt water damage will be unable to make it past the snow.

Debuff

Shotguns & Socialites has a list of standard status conditions, located in the Combat chapter. They are arranged into three tiers, based on how harmful their effects are. The base effect level depends on the duration, plus the effect's tier. Much like dealing damage, debuffing a character always requires an attack roll. Removing the damage from this attack roll lowers the effect level by 1.

Status Tiers

1st: Daze, nausea, distract, panic

2nd: Curse, deaf, blind, immolate, outrage

3rd: Slow, prone

Debuff Duration

0 Level: 1 round

2nd Level: 1d4 rounds

4th Level: 1d6 rounds

6th Level: 1d8 rounds

8th Level: 1d10 rounds

10th Level: 1d12 rounds

Note that “prone” can only have a duration of 1 round.

Examples:

Jarret wants to force a dictator to bow before him. The GM decides this is essentially the same as being prone, without the damage, giving it an effect level of 2nd. The GM, knowing what words Jarret knows, suggests move person, but Jarret's player decides that he'd rather use control emotion, since he wants the dictator to know what it's like to truly surrender, if just for a moment. Since control is a very general word, this increases the effect level by 2. Further, he decides to spend an additional 4 PP to give himself a +4 bonus on the Power check. Jarret readies the scepter he stole from the dictator, spends 8 PP, and makes a TN 18 Power check. If he succeeds, he then makes an attack roll against the dictator, and if the attack hits, the dictator “willingly” bows before him.

Goizane gives the evil eye to a guy who cut her off in traffic. Her player decides that this will curse him for about 7 seconds, which the GM rounds to 1d4 rounds, giving it an effect level of 4. Her player picks the words teach anger, which the GM feels is not quite right. The GM would prefer weaken human, but she doesn't have those words. The GM decides that it's close enough, but she'll have disadvantage on the Power check and won't be allowed to spend bonus PP to increase the odds. Finally, she decides that she'd rather not pull out her shotgun while driving, so she will attack him with her voice, yelling obscenities at him. Goizane spends 4 PP, and makes a TN 18 Power check, at disadvantage. If she succeeds, he then makes an attack roll against them, and if the attack hits, it deals 1d4 anger damage to him and curses him for 1d4 rounds. Since the guy has no PP, the GM decides that his curse will take the form a bird crashing into his windshield.

Dispel

Dispelling magic renders its effects harmless in some fashion. Dispelling always uses the word magic, and its effect level is equal to the effect-to-be-dispelled's level. Unlike most effects, the level is modified by the other word.

Examples:

After destroying the machine, Avi is trapped inside the factory compound by magical forcefields. He uses destroy magic to destroy the force fields. The GM decides the force fields have an effect level of 6th. This is unmodified, since destroy is a specific verb. Avi spends 6 PP and makes a TN 22 Power check.

Lennart has been trapped inside a death trap by Dr. Kolar. The trap is covered with magical runes that emit dangerous laser beams. Lennart uses alter magic to make the runes emit harmless soap bubbles instead. The GM decides the lasers have an effect level of 2nd. This is increased by 2, since alter is a very general verb. Lennart spends 4 PP and makes a TN 18 Power check.

Healing

Healing effects usually restore HP, but can also restore functionality to something that has been damaged. A single hit point can be recovered as a 1st level effect, or a number of d8 worth of HP can be recovered as an effect whose level is equal to the number of dice rolled plus 1. Parts that were never there cannot be recovered magically; in a sense, the character's “true self” is missing the appropriate part. Reviving the dead is very difficult, and can only be done by powerful magics.

Examples:

Nina has taken 45 crush damage from falling from a height of 65 feet. She decides that she is going to heal herself 6d8, which is a 7th level effect. She uses the word heal self, which does not change the effect level. Nina spends 7 PP and makes a TN 24 Power check.

Somebody cut Elin's brakes! The GM decides that the brakes represent about 8 of the car's 50 HP. Since 8 is almost equal to 2d8, this would be a 3rd level effect. She uses the words simulate technology to get the smog, dirt, cobwebs, and dead leaves around her car to temporarily function as brake cables. Since technology is a general word, this increases the effect level to 4th. She spends 4 PP and makes a TN 18 Power check.

Illusion

An illusion is an effect whose primary purpose is to seem like a different effect. Different illusions have different “resolutions,” which is what determines its effect level. Seeing past an illusion requires a TN 10 plus the “resolution” level skill check, of a skill chosen by the GM.

Examples:

One of the government agents chasing Indy made it past the avalanche. Indy wants to make a papier-mâché copy of his car and send it down the off-ramp. The GM tells him to use the words make plant. The GM also tells him that the papier-mâché copy is so bad that it's a 1st level effect, which is increased by 2 since make is very general. Indy spends 3 PP and makes a TN 16 Power check. If he succeeds, the agent must pass a TN 11 Search check.

Andreia wants to bend the light around her many, many bricks of illegal drugs to make them look like potted cacti. Andreia's player decides that she wants to use the words move light to do it, and she wants it to be very high resolution, say 5th level. Since move and light are very specific, the effect's level is only 4th. Andreia spends 4 PP and makes a TN 18 Power check. If she succeeds, others must pass a TN 15 Nature check to notice that something is wrong. Anyone who interacts with them using a sense other than sight notices that something is wrong without a check, since move light only affects the light. If she had instead used alter mind, it might have fooled all the senses, but then it wouldn't have worked on pictures or digital recordings.

Protection

Protection reduces the amount of damage characters take. The level of the effect equals the amount of protection, plus a factor based on the duration. Protection from explosion damage raises the level by 1, and from all damage raises it by 2.

Protection Duration

0 Level: The next attack before your next turn

2nd Level: 1 round

4th Level: 3 rounds

6th Level: 5 rounds

8th Level: 1 minute (12 rounds)

10th Level: 1 hour

Examples:

Raj is in a fist-fight with a polar bear. His player wants to protect him from the bear's claw attacks, but he also wants to get some attacks in, so he decides that the duration should be 3 rounds. The only words that are applicable are enhance self; since enhance is a general word, that would increase the power level by 1. Since Raj is 6th level, he can only use 6th level or lower effects, so his player decides that he'll only give him 1 protection against cut. Raj spends 6 PP and makes a TN 22 Power check.

Frans is behind an upturned table with several people, hiding from armed gunmen. They have low-level handguns that only deal 1d4 damage. He decides that he'll make the table bulletproof for just a round and then yell to get their attention, which should give his allies enough time to engage. His player decides that he'll give the table 4 protection against pierce for 1 round, using alter substance. His word choice increases the effect level by 2, giving a total effect level of 4 + 2 + 2 = 8th. Frans spends 8 PP and makes a TN 26 Power check.

Skill Bonus

Some effects just add a bonus to a skill. The effect level is half the bonus, rounded up, plus a bonus based on the duration. Alternatively, the skill bonus might instead allow the skill to be used in a slightly different way than normal.

Skill Bonus Duration

0 Level: 1 round

1st Level: 3 rounds

2nd Level: 1 minute (12 rounds)

3rd Level: 15 minutes

4th Level: 1 hour

5th Level: 8 hours

Examples:

If Spyridoula doesn't pass her environmental science final, her mom won't let her go on adventures any more. Immediately before the final, her friend Feliciano's player decides that Feliciano will magically increase her Nature skill by 2 for an hour. This is a 6th level effect. His player decides that he will use the words learn infection, hoping that the material concerning water-borne illnesses will be covered extensively. Since learn is a specific word, the effect level isn't changed. Feliciano spends 6 PP and makes a TN 22 Power check. After (and if!) he passes, the GM reveals that water-borne illnesses are only briefly covered on the test; cutting the bonus in half to just a +1 bonus to Nature.

Minako wants to impress a crowd by walking on water. The GM decides that this is mechanically a twist on Swimming. Running across the small turtle pond won't even take a round. The GM decides that this is a 1st level effect. She decides that she'll use crush water to force the water to temporarily form hard disks where her feet touches the surface. Th effect level is unchanged since water is a specific word. She spends 1 PP and makes a TN 12 Power check.

Status Immunity

Immunity to status conditions is like the debuff version of protection. The base effect level depends on the duration, plus the effect's tier.

Status Tiers

0: Particular environmental hazards

1st: Daze, nausea, distract, panic

2nd: Curse, deaf, blind, immolate, outrage

3rd: Slow, prone

Status Immunity Duration

0 Level: Ends the effect of a currently active status condition

2nd Level: 1 round

4th Level: 3 rounds

6th Level: 5 rounds

8th Level: 1 minute (12 rounds)

10th Level: 1 hour

Examples:

Norbu's doppelganger is about to pull his oxygen hose out of his space suit. He wants to make himself immune to suffocation and explosive decompression for a minute; hopefully, he'll be able to reattach the hose in that time. The GM decides that these two effects are essentially a singe environmental hazard, so the base effect level is 0 + 8 = 8th. He uses the words make air; since make is very general, this raises the effect level by 2. Norbu spends 10 PP and makes a TN 30 Power check.

Summon

Summoning effects add a new combatant to fights on the side of the evoker. This can be a result of calling a creature from another dimension, detaching a body part to fight independently, animating an inanimate object, raising a fallen ally from the dead just long enough to finish the fight, weaving an illusion that harms others with psychic violence, and many, many more. The base effect level is equal to the summoned character's level, plus a modifier based on the duration. A character can only summon one character at a time.

Summoning Duration

4th Level: 3 rounds

6th Level: 1 minute (12 rounds)

8th Level: 15 minutes

10th Level: 8 hours

Examples:

Marian is trapped under a pile of rubble. Her player wants to summon a copy of her to dig her out. The GM says that such a summoning would be too difficult for her, since the effect level would be at least her own level + 4, so she instead decides to summon a copy of her from before she gained her powers. Such a character is level 0, and it would take her, with her 4 Brawn, at least a minute to dig her out, for a base effect level of 6th. Her player chooses the words copy self; since copy is a general word, this increases the effect level by 1. Marian spends 7 PP and makes a TN 24 Power check.

Tapani has died in combat with Tsar Koschei II, a lich. His boyfriend Nemo is very worried, since he's the only one that can dispel the magical barrier protecting the crown housing the tsar's soul. He decides to use heal human to raise him back from the dead just long enough to dispel the barrier. Since they are the same level, human is a general word, and usually the minimum duration of a summoning is 3 rounds, this would normally be impossible. The GM considers the act to be narratively interesting, so they decide to allow it, with a few caveats. First, the duration would be not even an entire round; just a single full-round action. Second, pulling his soul from the afterlife this way would prevent them from resurrecting him later. Finally, Tapani's player would have to agree to it; otherwise, Tapani just won't answer the call, so to speak. All the players agree that if they don't kill the lich now, the whole party will be killed, so they accept the GM's offer. Since the GM is ignoring the normal rules this time, Nemo's player asks them what the effect level is. He decides that it's 6th, Tapani's level. Nemo spends 6 PP and makes a TN 22 Power check. If he succeeds, Tapani will immediately make a Power check of his own.

Teleport

Teleportation moves something from point A to point B. The GM should only use teleport if it is important to the story where the thing came from and where it is going. Items teleported to the evoker should use the create rules and characters should use the summon rules. Items and character teleported away from the evoker to some place dangerous or otherwise difficult to return from should use the “all or nothing” damage rules. The effect level is based on the distance and on the error, plus an additional 1 level if it never teleports the target somewhere where it would immediately be damaged. The error is based on the distance, with the direction decided at random.

Distance

1st Level: 3 yards

2nd Level: 20 yards

3rd Level: 160 yards

4th Level: 1,200 yards, 1 mile, 1 kilometer

5th Level: 10,000 yards, 6 miles, 10 kilometers

6th Level: 80,000 yards, 45 miles, 80 kilometers

7th Level: 630,000 yards, 350 miles, 630 kilometers

8th Level: 5 million yards, 3,000 miles, 5,000 kilometers

9th Level: 40 million yards, 25,000 miles, 40,000 kilometers

10th Level: Another dimension

Error

0 Level: 1d100%

1st Level: 4d20%

2nd Level: 4d12%

3rd Level: 4d10%

4th Level: 4d8%

5th Level: 4d6%

6th Level: 4d4%

7th Level: No error

Direction, Roll a d8

1: North

2: Northeast

3: East

4: Southeast

5: South

6: Southwest

7: West

8: Northwest

Examples:

Dr. Olmo wants to teleport from his office to the center of the cafeteria, a distance of 25 yards. This is about 20 yd, and Dr. Olmo's player decides that an error of 4d10% is reasonable, and he definitely does not want to end up somewhere dangerous, so the base effect level is 2 + 3 + 1 = 6th level. He chooses the words move self, which are both very specific, lowering the effect level to 5th. He spends 5 PP and makes a TN 20 Power check. If he passes, he rolls 4d10 for the error and then 1d8 for the direction. If he, for example, rolled 22 and 5, he would appear 25*22% = 6 yards south of the center of the cafeteria.

Inti wants to teleport his car keys from inside of his locked car to his hands, a distance of 1 yard. He really doesn't want his car keys to appear somewhere else in the car, burred in the snow, or anywhere else annoying but perfectly safe, so he guarantees that they be teleported without error. This is a 1 + 7 = 8th level effect. He chooses the words move metal, which doesn't change the effect level. He spends 8 PP and makes a TN 26 Power check. If he passes, the keys appear in his hand.

Combining Multiple Effects

Often, a single use of magic has multiple effects. In these cases, the overall effect level equals the highest effect level, plus the number of effects, minus one.

Examples:

Sandra is driving her vehicle into a wall and want to switch places with an enemy at the last possible moment so that they crash instead. The enemy vehicle is 20 yd away, and the GM decides that amount of damage a head-on collision would deal at these speeds is 1d12. Thus, it combines two 2nd level teleports with 6th level damage. Since the highest level is 6th, and there are three effects, the total level is 6 + 3 - 1 = 8. Sandra is using the words switch technology, so the effect level is increased by 1, since they are both general words. Sandra readies her epee, spends 9 PP and makes a TN 28 Power check. If she passes, she rolls the error on the teleport, and then makes the attack roll. If the attack hits, they crash, taking weapon damage + 1d12 crush damage. If she misses, they still switch places, but they manage to avoid hitting the wall.

Valentina and two of her friends wish to recover an ancient relic from inside an active volcano. The immense heat would deal 1d12 fire damage a round to them, so the GM agrees that 7 protection would make them immune. Since she has a lot of power points, she decides that she will reuse this power over and over each round; thus, it has a duration of 1 round. The effect's base level is 9th, since the protection amount is 7, and the duration increases it by 2. Since she's applying it to three targets, the overall level is 9 + 3 - 1 = 11th. She chooses to use the words chill mountain. Since they are both very specific, this lowers the level to 10th. Each round, she must spend 10 PP and makes a TN 30 Power check.

Magical Forces

In Shotguns & Socialites, the study of magical forces is known as oneirology. Initially, the science of oneirology was mixed up with superstition and practical considerations, giving rise to common magical tasks known as spells. Beginning in the 1890's, spell-based magic began to be replaced what is now known as tropical sorcery, named after the fact that many of its inventors were from countries that lie in the tropics. Their approach was heavy on mathematics, and did not catch on in adventurer communities until 1955, when Dr. Ova Alvarez wrote her seminal work “The Words of Power,” which replaced much of the complicated mathematics with her theory of Words. Her approach trades precision and flexibility for easy of use, which is especially useful in life or death situations. Nowadays, many high schools offer a course in her theory, with more advanced students being introduced to a tiny fraction of the mathematical parts of tropical sorcery.

Environmental Factors

There are three important environmental factors:

Ambient mana. If power points are the fuel, mana is the medium through which magic is accomplished. In most places on Earth, the background mana field (BMF) is constant, but close to incredibly powerful magical objects, like certain factories or artifacts, the BMF is more intense, giving everyone advantage on their power checks. When Lilith returns sometime this year, it is expected to give similar bonus. In some isolated places, include outer space and the surface of Luna, the BMF is so low that everyone gets disadvantage on power checks. Even deeper into space, the BMF falls off to 0, and no magic is possible.

Ley lines. A ley line is a singularity in the BMF, a line on the surface of the Earth where the magical potential diverges to infinity. Usually, they are too thin to use for much, but several ley lines close together can create a region of power, where the BMF is not just dramatically more intense, but also twisted, warping the effects of magic. The exact effects are up to the GM, and require an onierology check to find out.

The stars. The BMF surrounding Earth often pulls itself towards certain stars, much like how the ocean is pulled towards the moon. Scientists theorize that those stars have planets with their own BMF's. The position of the constellations, moons, Sun, and other planets can enhance some magic and diminish others. The exact effects are up to the GM, and require an onierology check to find out.

Laws

Magical “laws” are rules of thumb that help adventurers evoke their powers under most conditions. At extremely high and low levels of magical energy (which are unlikely to appear outside of a lab), these rules do not necessarily apply. Following a law gives a bonus to power rolls. This bonus cannot exceed the number of power points spent on the power.

Law of Association: Things that are related to each other are magically connected to each other. The bonus is based on how related the two things are. For example, someone trying to create an ice stature might receive a +1 bonus if they are holding an ice cube, and someone trying to teleport to a restaurant might receive a +1 bonus if they are holding the restaurant's menu, or a +2 if the menu came from the particular restaurant.

Law of Precision: No one is ever as prepared as they could be. Just taking more time can give a bonus, from +1 for spending an extra minute, to +3 for spending eight hours. A skill check of a skill related to the desired effect can double this bonus; the TN is equal to the power check's TN.

Law of Symbolism: Every culture in the world has a rich tapestry of symbols they employ. By using symbols that resonate with the evoker, they can more easily move magical energy around. The bonus is based on how particular the symbol is to the desired effect; vague symbols offer no bonus. For example, an engineer might associate a piece of fiber optic cable with communication, and the color red is associated with stop signs in Ysian culture, so holding a red fiber optics cable might give a +3 bonus to telepathically sending a warning to one's allies.

#shotguns and socialites #rpg #rules

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nomercles · 7 years

Text

spn meme

Oh, fun! Thanks, @zmediaoutlet!

1. What season did you start watching SPN?

Between 4 and 5. I was in a game and our GM was a HAAAACK, and also a big mouth, and so he figured out that when he wholesale lifted the plot of the show he’d finally did something I liked and found interesting, and tried to curry favor by telling me all about this show I’d really love. Except I’m actually smart, and figured out pretty damned fast that I was basically priestess!Sam, which is flattering I guess, but still pretty shitty. And I immediately dropped the game and kept the show.

2. Who was the first character you fell in love with?

Oh, Dean. Absolutely. He was exactly my type, and Jared Padalecki looks like the cleaned-up Hollywood version of the dominant who’d just dropped my ass and it freaked me out quite a lot. Dean’s love for him won me over, though.

3. Who was a character you hated at first, but grew to love?

I don’t know that love is as strong as I’m feeling, but I’m going to go with Rowena and Naomi. They finally got really interesting, just before they died. Why the hell do the writers do that? (rhetorical question) And a touch of Sam, because of the aforementioned bad relationship timing business, but I got over it fairly quickly. (And bonus? It helped me get over the guy faster, too. “This is who you could have been, you asshat!”)

4. Which character would you most like to be in a long-term relationship with?

Oh. Um. Here’s the trick. This answer will be different in about a week. Ask again for variety. Right this second, I’m going with Jody or Benny. Jody just hits every single one of my buttons, and Benny is really not far behind. Ohhhh, can I have Jody/Ellen/Benny? Is that greedy?

5. If you could go on just one date with one character, which one would you choose?

Oof. Meanie. Yeah, I’m going with Dean.

6. What would you do on the date?

I do love a nice car. I’m a girl of varied tastes. I can do aperitifs in the parlor just as easily as burgers in a bar. But I love someone who’s uncomplicated--or if they are complicated, they’re self-soothing. I just think Dean could make it fun. Unpretentious, easy, and fun. I don’t date easily or well at all, and being with someone who could help us over the bumpy bits would be nice. (I think I basically have been on a date with Dean, and it was just about perfect. They made for the perfect one-night-stand, if I’m only ever going to have one.)

7. Which character would you most want to be like?

Ellen. It takes a hell of a woman to go through everything she has and to still have her shit together, and she still has steel and velvet in her spine. She’s tough, but not hard, and she doesn’t tolerate fools lightly, and she will absolutely go to war for you, if you’re one of hers. I admire the hell out of her.

8. Which character would you most like to see brought back from the dead?

No one. Let people fucking die. Let death have meaning again. The story is so much more interesting and powerful if there are some fucking consequences. That said, I do wonder how an older and wiser Sam and Dean would handle being faced with a new roster of Special Children.

9. Which character would you most like to punch?

Most? That’s hard. Balthazar. Or Zachariah. Or really, and this would please me greatly, lock them in a room together and never let them out and tell me how that goes.

10. Who is your absolute favorite character?

SamDeanSam&Dean. If I put that all together we can pretend it’s just one character, yes? Okay, fine. Sam and Dean, the unit.

11. Which “big bad” do you think was the worst?

Toss up between Metatron and Azazel. I hated Metatron the most, but Azazel was most frightening to me. Often, it’s the lesser-bads that are more unbearable to me.

12. Which character are you most like?

You know, someone told me just recently that I’m a lot like Donna. I don’t think this is a question I can answer for myself. I know myself pretty well, but I still come armed with pre- and misconceptions. I know who I want to be, and I know who I think I’ve been. I don’t have a solid grasp on how others see me.

13. What death hit you the hardest?

Bobby’s, or Dean’s latest one. Though, again, repeated returns cheapen it. Oh, man, and Ellen and Jo going out had me bawling. I think those are the only ones that have had me needing to take a break.

14. What season finale hit you the hardest?

5. And then 11.

15. What are your ten all-time favorite episodes?

Oh, man, I hate you so much right now. This is going to take some thinking.

(2.14) Born Under a Bad Sign

(3.10) Dream a Little Dream of Me

(4.01) Lazarus Rising

(5.04) The End

(5.14) My Bloody Valentine

(5.16) Dark Side of the Moon

(6.04) Weekend at Bobby’s

(7,10) Death’s Door

(8.06) Southern Comfort

(10.05) Fan Fiction

(12.04) American Nightmare

I tried. I really did. There’s eleven. I couldn’t get it lower. Chronological order, rather than order of preference. And to be honest, I’m probably wrong on a couple, but now my brain hurts, and this is what you get.

16. What’s been your favorite season?

Ohhh, so, fun discovery! I always hate the current season for a while, and then a few watches later, I’ll realize that I fucking love that thing. (S7 being the exception so far. Still don’t care for it.) But I’m going to go with S4-5, because I can’t separate them. They flow too beautifully together.

17. Who is your favorite angel?

Super unpopular--though not surprising--opinion: it is decidedly not Cas. Probably Gabriel. He’s not a good guy, but he’s fucking interesting. And that whole “run from my problems, make things worse, try to be heroic but maybe it’s too late by now” thing is a trend for me. Though, thank Chuck, not on quite such a cosmic scale.

18. Who’s your favorite demon?

Meg, Ruby, Casey, Alastair, War. I’m not good at this There Can Be Only One thing. And all of those appeal in completely different ways, so I can’t really compare them anyway. Meg had such an interesting character development. Ruby was so smug, and for all that she was sly, she was also kind of clumsy. Moments of brilliance, but she wasn’t any kind of master manipulator. I wonder if she could have done it without the blood. Casey seemed like she had some fascinating stories in there, and she was the first demon we really got to see as a person. Alastair was...God. *shudder* And War was just so cheerful about it all. He knew his job, he liked his job, and he was secure.

19. Who’s your favorite evil character?

Alastair. And a runner-up of Azazel!John.

20. Do you have any Supernatural ships?

Have you met me? Die-hard Wincester over here. Dimpala. And what’s the one for Death/Dean? I don’t read that one very often, but there are some good fic. And for Sam, I kinda like asexual Sastiel and cozy snuggly Sevin.

21. Who’s your favorite supporting actor?

Oh, man, it’s between Charles Malik Whitfield, Ruth Connell, and Aldis Hodge. I have liked literally everything I have seen Whitfield do, I followed Hodge over to Leverage, and I could watch Ruth Connell say “moose” all damned day.

22. What’s your favorite quote from the show?

...is there a database of good SPN quotes somewhere that I can consult? Because I think I need one for this question. Maybe Meg: “Look, I'm simpler than you think. I've figured one thing out about this world – just one, pretty much. You find a cause, and you serve it. Give yourself over, and it orders your life. Lucifer and Yellow Eyes – their mission was it for me.”

23. If you could cast one famous actor in an episode of SPN, who would it be?

Fuck, man, I don’t know. *stares at DVD shelf* Brendan Fraser or Sam Elliott.

24. If you could write your own episode, what kind of creature would you like to see included?

ooo! I’d like to see them dig into some very local monsters. Not local to me, but personal to America monsters. Try to hunt down a Thunderbird.

25. Who’s your favorite girl that Dean’s hooked up with?

Tara Benchley. She just looked so satisfied. Or Suzy Lee from (9.08) Rock and a Hard Place.

26. Who’s your favorite girl that Sam’s hooked up with?

Dr. Cara Roberts. I have an affection for women who are just there for fun and aren’t interested in anything more. Not because I don’t want the guys to have outside relationships (though, I don’t, because that’s not what I’m watching the show for), but I like women who just know what they want and are interested in playfully objectifying the guys.

27. What are some of your favorite convention moments?

I don’t really watch the con videos much. I will every so often, but the sound is always crap, and I get a headache. I do quite like watching Jensen sing, though. Hot damn.

28. If you were going to guest star (or be a recurring guest star) on spn, how would you want your character described?

Cheerful, and snarky. I’m gonna die anyway, I might as well be fun.

29. What do you hope to see in the next season?

The Winchesters just being Winchesters. Unless I am very much mistaken, this is the last season, so how about we go back to the show I fell in love with? Like all mythic characters, Sam and Dean are both inherently human, and deeply divine. So how about we get shit like the great icons trying to find clothes that fit them, or arguing over who left red socks in the laundry and why the hell do we even have red socks, Sam. I want the show to end as beautifully as it could have been if they’d actually stopped at the end of 5.

30-40. If you had to choose...

Bobby or John? After all this time, John. Let Bobby die.

Bela or Ruby? Ruby.

Jess or Madison? No opinion. Madison, just because Jess carries the same problems as Mary.

Jo or Lisa? Jo.

Charlie or Kevin? Kevin.

Balthazar or Ash? ASH.

Cas or Crowley? Crowley.

Ben or Claire? Claire.

Jody or Donna? Jody. That’s a tough one, though.

Sam or Dean? No. I’m not even going to entertain this one.

#spn #spoilers #this was fun!#and took forever!#thanks!

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bffhreprise · 5 years

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Entry 283

Gaming with Raine was a wonderful way to get to know her better, and few enough were awake throughout the night that we really had interruptions, leaving me with an abundance of time to learn more about her.

She once told me that lightning seemed fairly quick in an off-hand way that made lightning sound slow next to her, but her heart was every bit as kind as her feet were swift. Playing the game of seemingly limitless possibilities, Raine chose to be a crafter, helping to make the dreams of others become a reality for them. I doubted that I was the only one who noticed how much cheaper Raine made things for her guildmates than average market price, and there was no doubt in my mind that she was very well aware of the losses she took.

During my months here, I saw time and again the incredible power of my fellow residents, but I still couldn't even guess at what Raine's limits were, mentally or physically. Raine's mind was infinitely fascinating to me. Speaking to her of crafting, not once did I find a question she could not answer immediately in enough detail to make Aaliyah proud. Her social anxiety limited the jobs she took in the real world, but she knew everything she had done in perfect detail far beyond what I could manage with my vampiric sense.

With James joining us to chase down rare meteoric materials, the enormous gap between Raine's abilities and my own would only be more obvious, considering that I couldn't come close to competing with James, who was a far cry from beating Raine on anything other than charm.

She had been playing with her kitten while waiting for James to get ready, but she started to move the moment he approached, despite not looking at her screen till he was by her side.

With all of the running around we had done in preparation, I only had a vague notion of where the meteorite would be found. Raine, who hesitated continuously when speaking with others, moved confidently as she led the way, probably having an exact spot in mind.

As we walked, she explained to James in detail the value of what we might find. There were numerous materials only to be found when they crashed to the ground, and she knew every possible use of each one. James proved to be as inquisitive as I was the first time around, asking for more examples with each material he favored. Eternite was his obviously his favorite as he expounded on how great it would be for the guild.

“Are you two ready for this?” questioned James as we neared the edge of civilization.

“Of course.” I insisted, despite feeling a little nervous. Madeleine, my character, was modeled after my features, despite being a halfling. I had made her a healer, unabashedly mimicking a vampire I freely admired, though Madeline could never match Ariadne’s skill. James was one of the best combatants in the guild, but he was our sole offensive character, heading into the most dangerous territory near our guild. Raine’s Nekopawpaw would easily outlive the Madeleine and Ignus if my healing proved insufficient. With no experience in any combat skills, she was still nearly impossible to hit and knew how to utilize her crafting skills efficiently in combat.

Raine took a deep breath, slowly letting it out as she nodded. With her assent, we pushed into the wilds, traveling carefully as we could while keeping pace with Raine's character. One of the many surprises with Nekopawpaw was her speed. I never would have guessed that a crafter could be so quick before seeing Nekopawpaw at work, blurring around her workshop.

"G-Goblins!" exclaimed Raine in a loud whisper.

Hearing her, the goblins charged. As Nekopawpaw jumped back, I moved Madeleine behind Ignus as he quickly unleashed a fire spell that incinerated them. Typically weak individually, Goblins could still swarm a strong character, wearing them down. James' attack was a good choice.

“T-that was… t-that was kinda… m-mean.” mumbled Raine.

“Huh? They were going to attack us.” stated James in confusion.

“B-but w-what if… if t-they w-wanted to… to t-talk." she argued.

“I’ve never seen goblins wanting to talk before, and we need to be careful.” he insisted.

She practically vanished into her chair, obviously disappointed.

Sighing, he said, “I’m sorry. I’ll try talking first next time.”. Catching sight of me, he looked startled for a moment.

Doing my best not to laugh at Raine's adorableness, I had replaced my mouth with skin and removed my larynx. The sight couldn't be that disturbing. James had seen worse.

Not too long later, we encountered another group of goblins. This time, James did his best to try speaking with them as he skillfully dodged their attacks. Meanwhile, Raine started speaking in a semi-guttural language that apparently required a very noisy mouth. As James and I watched, avoiding the goblins who weren't replying to Raine, she seemed to have a conversation with them.

“T-they… t-they… w-want to eat us.” she muttered in English.

“I guess we kill them first then.” replied James, moving Ignus to strike.

“N-no!” exclaimed Raine. “I-I’m g-giving them food… i-instead.”

“Oh. Sorry.” he replied, having Ignus lower his weapon.

The goblins actually did stop fighting as Raine initiated a trade with them. They took the food she offered and cautiously retreated. Well, all but one. The last lunged at Nekopawpaw, greedily wanting more. Before I could even cast a shield spell, Nekopawpaw pulled out a smithing hammer and bashed the goblin's head, which cause stars to circle it, signifying the creature was stunned. From his expression, I felt James was stunned too!

“B-bad goblin.” rebuked Raine, pointing the hammer at the goblin till the stun lifted.

Feeling curious, I asked “How did you learn to speak goblin?”

“T-the l-library. M-most languages c-can be f-found there.” she explained. “Aalilyah t-told me. H-her c-character always t-talks her way out of t-things.”

“I honestly had assumed that was just some GM ability.” admitted James.

“N-no. I-I’ll get b-better.” insisted Raine.

“I’m sure you will.” he assured her.

“Know any of the other rare languages?” I inquired, glad she could see the smile tugging at my lip.

“All t-that are in the g-guild library.” she mumbled.

The guild library was enormous thanks to Aaliyah allocating a large amount of funds toward it. I could only imagine how large the language section was.

“Whoa. You’ve been busy. Mind showing me sometime?” I asked.

“I-I’ll g-glady show you.” she replied, smiling at me. If she noticed that I was amused, she didn’t seem to care.

“Mila, how many books on languages are stored in our guild library?” questioned James.

“Three hundred and one, master. I would be happy to teach them to you.” she replied, sounding suggestive, as she always did when speaking with him.

“Not right now.” he replied, ignoring the suggestion in her voice.

“Three hundred and one!? That’s crazy!” I exclaimed. “And they’re really full languages?”

“Y-yes.” stated Raine.

At the same time, Mila said, “Of course. What else would you expect from mother? Her father is a linguist, you know. I will warn you that their use in everyday life will be slightly cumbersome, since she created no words for things that are not found within the game. Some of the languages are limited even within the game. Goblins, for example, have no word for ‘door’. They don’t use doors, make doors, or care about doors, so they never bothered with naming it.”

“Aww… I still feel we could have fun with it.” I insisted, imagining reactions from others as Raine and I conversed in goblin.

“I should also warn you that learning the language yourself doesn’t count as your character learning it.” explained Mila. “If you were to speak goblin as Raine did, your words will sound like nonsense to those around you unless your character has the skill.”

“Why did you offer to teach me then?” questioned James.

“Because you know I’m far better than a book, master.” she insisted flirtatiously.

Giggling, I said, “Who can argue with that?”

No one tried. Offending Mila would be like offending a nanny who had dedicated her life to raising you; you’d have to be a monster not to feel guilty. Instead, we ventured farther into the wilderness, letting Raine talk our way out of fights against intelligent creatures. Surprisingly, Raine didn’t complain when James killed giant frogs, though she insisted he used weapons to avoid damaging parts she could use for cooking.

Hours after our journey began, we encountered terrain distinctly different from what came before it. The vegetation here seemed to rot as it lived, creating a disgusting environment that would probably smell as foul as it looked if the game could provide olfactory stimulation.

“We should head back.” stated James. He was frowning as he watched his screen.

“We’re so close though! Can’t we just be careful?” I asked, not wanting to leave without Raine getting what excited her so much.

“We can try, but we’re goners if we encounter the creature. This might be the one that escaped last summer.” replied James with firm resolve.

“Wasn’t playing yet. How bad was it?” I asked lightly, hoping to ease his tension.

“The guild formed to fight them, and every last one of us died during the last battle, trying to fight two demons at once. We did manage to kill one of them though.”

“What!? How much of the guild was there?” I questioned in surprise. Our guild was enormous!

“Over twenty thousand members.” he stated. “Ancient Tribes of Earth somehow manages full army combat without crashing the server or causing low end PCs to freeze.”

“I kinda want to see this. That sounds so cool!” I admitted, imagining the massive army facing off against a mighty foe.

“Y-you d-didn’t have to d-do so many r-repairs for people.” muttered Raine.

“Oh. Yeah. I suppose we did make you a bit busier than normal even. Sorry!” exclaimed James, looking at her apologetically.

“I d-don’t mind.” she assured him, embarrassed by the attention.

“Let’s do this!” moving Madeleine toward the smoking crater ahead.

Raine let me stay in the lead, which wasn’t exactly comforting, but James was coming along as well. Live or die, we were having an adventure!

#Best Friend For Hire Reprise #Best #Friend #For #Hire #Reprise #Jovial Times #Jovial #Times #Fantasy #Fiction #Story

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coruscantholonet · 5 years

Text

Survey Results Part 3 : The Negatives

Been dreading this section! The question was “ Would like to hear what you feel could use improvement? Please be constructive! “

My comments will be in bold. Identifying comments may have those portions redacted.

Combat System Related

“The combat system is tremendously complicated to configure and use. You have to make templates to guide the new players or they will not attract you. In my case I have decided not to use it, it requires too much time and there are faster options that favor roleplay “

The template suggestion is a good idea. This is one of the easier to learn systems we’ve used over the years though, if anyone has any trouble configuring it feel free to poke any online staff board or ask in the Discord, we’re here to help!

“ LRS needs to be balanced, going all points offense is just too much of an advantage “

We’re constantly testing and considering options,will look into this further!

“ Everything. Meter being #1 on at the moment. “

Sorry you feel that way! We do have meter as a “needs improvement”, and high priority in that category.

“ Less complicated systems not everyone is waaaaayy into the Dungeons and Dragons Aspect. i myself am from a era in SWRP where everything was Combat Meter. People will debate that combat meter is not rp and they are right from a certain point of view. However before we attacked someone or another group we extensively rped out the scenario these days its all DICE MATH DICE MATH i am horrible at math i come to SL to relax and just play out my character with the occasional battle here and there. Now i am aware thats all the current generation of SWRP but the freedom is very limited i'd prefer old school honor FFC above meter and dice but i realize there is a huge trust issue in the community which i gotta admit is somewhat logical considering the amounts of people that god-modded in the past especially the Sith and Jedi who all were SUPAH powerfull. Hell i'm a sith too but i hide it and play like Palpatine nobody knows i'm sith unless they are sufficiently alligned with the force to sense the intense dark energy hidden.

Eh long story short. Focus more on ROLEPLAY and less on DICE or any other system.

In the end we all come to SL to escape the hectics of life adding complicated systems like CLOCKS [Large Events only as far as i heard ] does make me want to just walk away. Turfs work pretty neat but requires more consistent rules like Take 1 turf a week to prevent Big groups such as my [REDACTED] to Streamwall it all I can go on for hours but wont bother you guys ;) I love the casual rp on the sim that's what drew me in “

“ feel like things like clocks and turf are bloat “

We’re looking at things like Clocks & Turf for revision or termination. Those behind it are no longer with us, and we do feel it’s current version is too heavy. The add ons such as that are not mandatory for players to know, they’re more for group leads and often something they can opt out of as well under certain circumstances.

“ Make LRS more like d20 “

I wish this one elaborated a bit more.

“ Only thing I can really think of, is maybe more instructive ways to teach the LRS system, notecards can be helpful. Explain such things like weapons, armor, items, in general to be obtained, where to get them etc. Host events to maybe entice people to get them. And maybe, have more items with different stats, mind you I realize some share different stats, but from what I can see in the starter items, very few have different stats. Not saying, starter items should be powerful, just saying the things I've noticed. I could be mistaken with the items itself, and may need more experience in it. Anyway, thank you for your time :) “

Some good suggestions here.

“ Leveling/Rank system is kinda meh'. While I do like a system that has leveling/rank to it keeps people honest and cuts down on meta/god emoting and shit. I feel like the gaps between some of the higher ranks and lower ranks seem like kinda insane. Which might be intended if so then I suppose it's fine but I feel like Emi basically can't interact with certain people in a hostile manner once she learns their abilities cause you she would have be insane to try it again lol. “

The gaps are actually much less significant than they have been in the prior systems we’ve used such as SWT & Chimera but will look further into that. I’ve personally lost to a 1 on a 5, so it’s not invincible mode by any means.

Build/Setting Related

“i feel it might be nice to see more places for people to sit and hang out around coronet, maybe replace some of the derelict vehicles or make it so you can sit on them like benches. id like to see more items handed out as mission rewards even if rarely. “

“ I'd like for there to be more places to sit in Vreni and Corenet. benches or just something as simple like being able to sit on clutter such as crates, vehicles, or even ledges. “

Been working on this, adding in more benches, small parks, etc. As well as getting more staff the ability to generate items that can be given as rewards. If anyone is running a storyline that they want to request items for ask in the Discord or ask me directly, if I’m busy I can at least point you to someone who can help

“ more fun, less stress ... but I have no clue how to make that happen other than just focusing on RP and letting everything else go entirely “

I agree! I assume this one is more about staff than the playerbase as we’ve been pretty happy with the low number of OOC player vs player incidents.

“ Rentals availability notifier “

“ It's hard to find personal rentals. I wish there was a map or something that showed where there were rentals available. “

“ more rental homes i feels like there's not enough rental homes especially on the lower section there's like 4 i beleave maybe bump this up a little if possible as i would belave it would make it better for more people to have homes there. “

Since the survey have added enough rentals to catch up on the waiting list. While the waiting list is now empty they are all full last I checked so will add more. The waiting list is why the boxes often auto-lock and do not notify. When we do have freed up rentals and no list I let people know in Discord announcements. If you want to get on said list let Zenless know, specify which of the rental types/location. Generally go down the list when one becomes free but if I don’t hear back from someone in 48 hours move on to the next person.

“ The island build kinda tbh “

Would have liked elaboration as to why, I personally enjoy the contrasts in setting.

“ Add a area we can rez items we buy “

We do have a build box, but yeah need to be in the landgroup to rez, this is to protect the sim from griefers.

“ I feel like the furries need to be toned down, a lot of them seem to be pushing the limit on what is okay for a character. Otherwise I don't have a whole lot that comes to mind. “

If you have concerns about an avatar, contact a GM or an Admin. No one else should be confronting people about avatar appearance. Mentors will help those wondering if their avatars conform as well.

“ More open areas, like forests, deserts and snowy mountains, depicting the different Corellian environments and bringing more RP scenario options. “

Worked on it with the addition of the RP scenes, currently there are 4, we may switch them up now and then, any player can use these for their adventures. As of writing this we have a snowy one, a shadowy planet, a jungle and a minimalist desert. It often depends how many prims we have free how details these are. Things are also added to them specifically for a story, etc.

Story Related

“ Perhaps get more people involved IN the Holonet so we have a wider scope of story coverage from other factions/sources. “

“ StoryLine for the sim. News Reports. “

Would love to! Contact Zenless anytime you have something you would like printed on the news, we’ll take anything from briefs to full length articles. It’s generally me (Zen) who ends up writing most, but would love to have more contributors.

“ Easier access to groups. More storys that involve the "lesser" people that arnt part of a huge faction. Less hiding the roleplayers in faction bases. “

“ More events and gatherings for other time zones. It sucks that all of them are always at 9PM at night US EST. Some of us have jobs... “

“ Perhaps slightly more conflict between the groups. “

“ Most improvements are at the group level. All group leads should be working to give their players some daily content. Whether it be a small quest, large mission, or just something to progress their IC storylines. Right now it seems group leads are more there for policing than GM (game master) “

“ I feel that the Storytellers should put out more events, as well as come to defining the terms of the Clock System in a Simple way. There is too much confusion even among Admins about it. The Sim Build should also be improved to reflect 4D Coruscant. While an Island is nice it is only ever used for beach parties or the Jedi. Whilst every other RP is taking place in Coronet City or the Event Boxes. I am sorry if this was not very constructive but typing it out is a lot harder than explaining on voice. Come hangout with myself or talk to [REDACTED]. “

“ leadership in groups focusing on small scale rp to advance players char's ICly “

“ Could use more roleplay opportunities such as organized events. “

Lot of similar themes in these 6 so I’ll touch on them at once. Our group leads have been great and have been the primary ones responsible for the high levels of activity. On the other hand since the start we had a story team that did not put much time and effort in other than those who were also group leads. There was a main story arch yet few if any segments were ever run, and when these people left they asked for their stories not to be used so we had to go back to the drawing board. We’re working very hard to get more people involved in stories/running stories, do let me know if you are interested as we’re always looking for more aid. Typically we bring on people as mentors first, find out what they do well and help with stories if desired.

“ Not having jedi trying to confiscate lightsabers as if they are the cops... “

You could go to CorSec ICly. This one really seems like an IC issue as it is technically a violation of Corellian policy/law.

Staff/Management/Leadership Related

“ I feel there is a bias that favors the Jedi with staff “

“ the admins other than Eva do not seem like they care about the players “

“ Some of staff can at times be out of touch with the playerbase and comes off as elitist “

“ One owner has to go as per the jedi discussion on the jedi discord. The rest of the sim is fine. “

“ Admins “

“ Easiest suggestion. Unity. This admin team, just like the old 4D, is being trapped in drama. Things need to be unified and aligned to help the admin team mesh, instead of argue. “

“ some of the staff come off as condescending and rude mostly jedi who are also staff “

“ Consensual basis of decisions by the staff. Seems like things are constantly at odds. “

“ tessa and perry should not be admins “

“ Really wish the admins could be more approachable and stuff :l Except for Ootarian, he cool :D “

“ stop taking on owners who are terrible admins but just have money. wil,perry,lone,keely and so on “

“ I feel the LRS could be slightly more balanced rank-wise. I'd also like to see more LRS items but not too many. Less staff drama would be nice as to not fracture the community and kill RP. More sim-wide events such as Pazaak tournaments, races and even combat-oriented ones would be welcome “

“ Not a big fan of LRS but it’s better than most dice systems. Would like to see consensual agreements on staff rather than seemingly duking it out “

As some may have noticed there has been an overhaul of staff, much of this will seek to address any of the comments here. Everyone knows I say what I think to a fault. So I’ll be transparent in my POV (take as you will) though I’m sure some are going to be unhappy I even touched on this. The SWL Community was in bad shape after what happened on 4D for those who were here for that, I made a bad judgement call in some of the people I partnered with as our views were incompatible. I was very depressed after 4D (our prior region), and didn’t input as much as I should have when it came to staffing the sim, so they filled the staff with those who I’d consider their “friends”. Staff often became a battlefield of ideology between myself and what I saw as a circle of friends. In no way am I ever a perfect angel, and there are patches that I could have navigated better so I am responsible for the conflicts within staff as much as the departed are. Sometimes people just don’t work well together. What’s done is done though and moving forward I feel we’ve been making a lot of progress in having a more cohesive team. Still some rough patches as any sim with a decent sized playerbase is going to have it’s share of arguments, but I can say for certainty that everyone involved in leadership now genuinely cares about the community and that we’ll do our best to listen to the players and strive for consistent improvement.

“ Telling myself that "You seem to be breaking the system, the sith might need their own story system" isnt encouraging. We are here to help the story move along but because we are the only ones really using the Clock system. Our use of it in my opinion should be rewarded not, not discouraged so that way other groups are encouraged to use it also. And this isn't me complaining, this is how what is being said is being perceived. “

The staff member who said this is among those who departed (who have been mentioned often here). We’ll strive for a fair environment for everyone/all groups where goal posts aren’t moved on a whim.

“ More freedom and less bureaucracy “

You and me both :D

“ My friend who had been rping here for a few days before me and participated in two events got told she couldn't rank up because she "only earned 1 exp" meanwhile I got enough to level up and that isn't cool because we both pretty much did everything together so it feels like there might've been some bias there. “

I know it’s repetitive but the person who did this is among those who departed. Fixed this personally as being consistent is of extreme importance to us.

“ Maybe a little more staff so no one feels overburdened. Would love to see currency added to LRS (kind of like Chimera), most inventory items/upgrades/mods/etc. Otherwise, I love this place. Great people and great fun! “

We are currently interested in taking on another mentor or two as there is a lot of work to be done, but we’re being careful in that we want a staff that can get a long to avoid a lot of the feedback that was brought up here on staff environment being internally hostile.

MISC

“ Clear advertisement of those willing to mesh-build or animate on commission for players would be nice! Even if we don't take them up on it, knowing it is available helps. “

I like this suggestion, will think of ways to try to advertise for them.

“ - More sim events for common people

- More story events at current scale before we try and move large scale. We really haven't even tested the waters here and yet we're trying to move larger? It's like an amusement park with one slide saying we need to buy more land rather than build more attractions in the available space to entertain people. Lets try and utilize the current setting to its fullest before we decide it needs to go larger - The main social hub moved to a neutral ownership.

- More balanced meter

- Less outrageous things being brought onto sim. The more outrageous things get, the harder it is to bring content because that content gets dismissed by one person with the snap of a finger rather than being a tension and toil to overcome It also puts newer players at a huge social disadvantage. “

This one touched on a lot of things so put it in misc. Pretty much touched on everything but “outrageous” in other sections. What people consider outrageous is very subjective but we do try to avoid anything too crazy.

“ A lot of people are a bit bossy and obligating others what to do with their character, especially how they look. That makes people, certainly those who put a lot of effort in them, really pissed. Maybe a send out that we all should respect each other in how we look and how we roleplay. Not everyone is a rich ass who can buy what they want or so experienced in roleplay as the other. So the basic thing is respect. “

True. If any issues with an avatar or anything else, a GM or Admin should be contacted. Players hostilely confronting other players is often something that will be considered a minor offense which can lead to disciplinary scenarios. If you need any help do let one of us know, it makes me very sad when I hear about someone being given a hard time over something like that.

In conclusion, thank you to everyone who filled out the survey. This was the hardest section to give feedback on as it does touch on a lot of “drama” elements. I’m not the smartest admin, def not the most PR or PC, I speak from the heart. It means a lot to me that after six years and all the obstacles that people are still here. I’ll do my best to try to improve everyone's experience. Please keep in mind we are a VERY diverse role-play community and it’s literally impossible to fully please everyone, sometimes the good of the many will outweigh the good of the few but the tyranny of the majority is also something you always try to keep at bay.

SWRP as a whole has now lasted about fifteen years as you can trace it’s origins back to 2003 while the first groups and sims really got going in 2004 with groups like the Mandalorians under Dazzo Street, Jedi under Marcus Moreau and others,the first Galactic Empire. Then in 2005 sims exploded with Korriban, Sirius, New Holstice, Tatooine, the founding of GAR & DLOTS. We may have had to do a lot of adapting and changing with the times to still be an active community, but fifteen years is an amazing accomplishment for any roleplay community. We’ll have our ups and downs but I think we’ve proven ourselves to be as resilient as they come. :)

#SWRP #StarWars #Corellia #SecondLife #SLRP

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flauntpage · 7 years

Text

DGB Grab Bag: Free Agency, Contract Announcements, and Draft Busts

Welcome to Sean McIndoe's weekly grab bag, where he writes on a variety of NHL topics. You can follow him on Twitter. Check out the Biscuits podcast with Sean and Dave Lozo as they discuss the events of the week.

Three stars of comedy

The third star: Justin Williams' hair. The winger's legendary salad was in fine form when it came time to sign with the Hurricanes, as former teammate Mike Commodore made sure to point out.

The second star: Jaromir Jagr. I'm still not quite sure what to make of Jagr's social media presence. People seem to like it, even if it sometimes has that whole "Grandpa doesn't totally get the internet, but we're just impressed he figured how to log on" vibe. But this was funny. I think. I'm honestly not sure.

The first star: The Benn brothers. With the Habs and the Stars reportedly going down to wire on bidding for Alexander Radulov, Jamie and Jordie decided to settle things the Canadian way.

Even better, the joke eventually turned into an official announcement of Radulov's signing.

Outrage of the week

The issue: Somebody signed an unrestricted free agent. The outrage: The contract seems kind of terrible. Is it justified: Probably, since almost every UFA deal ends up being a huge mistake. But since we've now made it through the first week of the open market, let's take this opportunity to do a quick summary of some of the major moves. (As always with this sort of thing, "good" and "bad" are from the perspective of the team and not the players, because in the end we all turn our backs on the noble working class.)

The Good

This is always the shorter list this time of year, but there were some decent signings to be found.

Kevin Shattenkirk. The Rangers get a bargain and kept the term short enough that there's minimal risk. Shattenkirk gets to play for his hometown team and could still have time for one more nice contract four years down the road. Hard to argue with any of it.

Justin Williams. He got good money, but nothing crazy. And while you can make your jokes about Mr. Game Seven choosing a team that hasn't been to the playoffs in eight years, you'd better get them in now—the Hurricanes are going to be good soon.

Pretty much everyone who signed for less than $1.5 million. Hell, lump in Brian Elliott and Ryan Miller, too. These guys are the bargains, and almost always represent low-risk signings. This year, it was interesting to see so many get done right out of the gate rather than waiting a few weeks for desperation to kick in.

The Bad

In the interest of time, we'll limit this section to five names. It could be a lot more.

Karl Azner. This is the annual "not as bad as everyone thought it was going to be, but still bad" contract. Or, as I like to call it, the Matt Beleskey Memorial Award.

T.J. Oshie. The cap hit isn't disastrous, but going to maximum eight years might be. The Capitals sure seem to have made a mess of their off-season, and already had to give away Marcus Johansson. Letting decent but aging wingers walk away for nothing is painful, but it's the sort of tough call a smart team has to be willing to make.

Patrick Marleau. Sure, the Leafs have a ton of cap space, so overpaying isn't the end of the world, but they have a two-year window before the cap gets crazy, and they just gave three years to a 37-year-old who plays the one position that's already a team strength. Even assuming they wiggle out of the deal after two years, it's still iffy. If they don't, it could be a disaster when they're a contender facing a cap crunch in 2019 and Marleau is a $6 million 40-year-old coming off a 12-goal season.

Nick Bonino. The good news is that this year's Dave Bolland cost less than the actual Dave Bolland. So… progress?

Dan Girardi. Steve Yzerman burns an entire season trading away useful players while missing the playoffs by one point, all in the name of creating cap room which he then uses on… Dan Girardi. I mean, I know I've spent the last year completely alone on the "maybe Yzerman is merely a good GM and not the all-knowing Jedi we all agreed he was" bandwagon, but I can make room if anyone wants on board.

The Contrarian Hot Take

The one team everyone else is ripping that I'll kind of, sort of defend.

Dmitry Kulikov and Steve Mason. Both are coming off bad seasons and might, in fact, be bad players. And both got over $4 million a season on multi-year deals. But here's the thing: They got them from Winnipeg. Nobody wants to go to Winnipeg. So if the Jets are going to sign free agents, it's going to cost too much money. Call it the Winnipeg Tax.

I'm always piling on the Jets because their GM never makes trades and their owner never fires anyone, and they just seem happy to repeatedly miss the playoffs by ten points while mumbling about the future. I can't exactly turn around now and burn them for at least trying to get a little better. Ideally, they'd be a franchise that uses all the tools in the toolbox, but until that day comes, paying too much for so-so free agents is marginally better than nothing.

Obscure former player of the week

Now that July has arrived, restricted free agents can sign offer sheets. They won't, because this is the NHL and all that talk about doing everything possible to win is for players laying their bodies on the line, not GMs who don't want to mess up their golf schedule by making a colleague angry. But in theory, it could happen.

There's a reasonably long history of NHL offer sheets, most of which were matched. Not many of those players would be considered obscure. After all, why target another team's player if they're not already an established star? You wouldn't… unless you were a vengeful Harry Sinden, which leads us to this week's obscure player: winger Dave Thomlinson.

Thomlinson has two claims to fame: not being Dave Tomlinson (that was another early 90s forward), and being the most obscure RFA offer sheet signing in NHL history.

He was a third-round pick by the Maple Leafs in 1985, a draft that most Toronto fans remember for other things. He never played for the Leafs, signed with the Blues in 1987, and finally made his NHL debut in St. Louis during the 1989-90 season. He played 19 games, scoring once, and followed that up with three games and zero points in 1990-91. He did manage three goals in that year's playoffs, but by the end of the season he was 24 years old and had never played close to a full season. All in all, not much to get excited about.

Then something weird happened. Ron Caron and the Blues went a little crazy targeting other teams' restricted free agents, signing Scott Stevens away from Washington in 1990 and Brendan Shanahan from New Jersey in 1991. In between, they went after Boston's Dave Christian. That didn't sit well with Sinden and the Bruins, who didn't even believe Christian qualified for free agency in the first place. Sinden retaliated by apparently signing any Blues RFAs he could find. That ended up being tough guy Glenn Featherstone, plus Thomlinson.

Under the old NHL system, the two teams were allowed to negotiate a compensation package, and they ended up just agreeing to swap Thomlinson, Featherstone, and draft picks for Christian. Thomlinson played 12 games for the Bruins before heading to the Rangers and later the Kings as a free agent. He ended up playing a total of 42 NHL games, scoring just that one regular-season goal.

Just think: The NHL is a league where nobody will offer sheet Leon Draisaitl, but somebody once went after Dave Thomlinson. Consider it further proof that everything was more fun in the 90s.

Be It Resolved

Connor McDavid signed his new contract this week, and it carried the highest full-season cap hit in NHL history. That's fine, because as we discussed last week, he's more than worth it. Besides, his deal came in at $12.5 million a season, which was slightly lower than the $13 million that had been rumored.

So sure, all of that was fine, but here's the problem: The Oilers just announced the deal with a boring old media event and press release. The Canadiens did the same for Carey Price, as did the Sharks with Marc-Edouard Vlasic.

Come on, guys. If you're going to be giving out eight- or nine-figure deals, then let's at least make the announcement interesting.

So be it resolved: From now on, NHL teams signing major extensions are only allowed to announce the length of the deal. Then, when it comes to the cap hit, they have to reveal it the way any important numerical value should always be revealed: by using the little mountain climber guy from Price Is Right.

youtube

Just imagine the Oilers having a press conference to announce that McDavid has signed for eight more years, then breaking out the Price Is Right mountain with "$0" at the bottom and "$15 million" at the very top. You're telling me you wouldn't be screaming at your TV once that yodeling started and you had to see how high the little dude with the pickax, lederhosen, and #97 Oilers jersey would get?

You could even have custom price ranges for different players. Jack Eichel's could go from $0 to $10 million. John Tavares could be $0 to $12 million. Dan Giradri's could go from $0 to "literally anything that isn't $0," and the little guy could go shooting off the edge like a skateboarder at the X Games.

Let's make this happen, NHL teams. There's still time before next summer's Austin Matthews contract.

Classic YouTube clip breakdown

In terms of cap hit, the biggest UFA signing so far has been Joe Thornton, who got an $8 million deal to return to the Sharks for one season. That's a big number, but it's fitting for a former first overall pick in the draft.

Of course, Thornton wasn't the only former top pick to hit the open market this week. Nail Yakupov was also available to the highest bidder, and that turned to be the Colorado Avalanche, who gave him, um, not quite $8 million. The Avs will be Yakupov's third team.

Yakupov's already widely considered one of the bigger draft busts in recent memory, so today let's travel back five years to the days leading up to the 2012 draft and see if we can piece together where it all went wrong.

It's June 20, 2012, and we're just 48 hours away from the first round of the draft. The NHL has decided to put together a few video packages on the top prospects to get you hyped up, including one for the presumptive No. 1 pick.

It goes without saying that the Oilers own the No. 1 overall pick thanks to a lottery win. This would be the third straight year they'd have it, which prompted the NHL to create a new rule to prevent lottery winners from winning the top pick again for a period of several years. The new rule was hailed as "completely fair" and "just common sense" and passed unanimously.

Sorry, none of that is true. I just wanted to try to retroactively make Connor McDavid happy for a few seconds.

Our clip starts with Yakupov doing that thing where he threateningly points his stick at you like he's Westley from the Princess Bride. Hockey video people love this pose so much. It's their favorite thing, slightly ahead of the "stick over the shoulders" pose, which we also get from Yakupov a few seconds later. Please note that neither of these poses ever actually happen in a hockey game. Do other sports do this? Do NFL draft picks have to pose like they're going to do a Karate Kid crane kick? I feel like this is just hockey.

"You want skill? Check. You want hands? Check. You want game-breaking offensive ability? Check." And after you're done checking, you will see that Nail Yakupov does not have any of those things.

Wait, is it possible the guy was actually saying "Czech"? Was he trying to tell the Oilers to pick Tomas Hertl instead? He knew! The narrator guy knew!

Next up we get the director of NHL Central Scouting, Dan Marr, who tells us that Yakupov is the sort of player who "just jumps at you." He then presumably adds, "You know, assuming 'you' are a defenseman on the other team trying to stop him from going to your net."

"I'm not like Bure, or someone like Ovechkin," says Yakupov. Wait, he knew, too! Why didn't the Oilers watch this clip before they made their pick? One two-minute video would have saved them millions of dollars. That's inexcusable. (Unless it had an unskippable 30-second ad at the front, because literally nobody has ever waited until the end of one of those.)

All kidding aside, Yakupov was really good in junior. When you're shattering Steven Stamkos records, you've got something. I make fun of him now, but five years ago I was 100 percent sure he was going to score 60 goals in the NHL. I'm still maybe 20 percent convinced it might happen, especially if can turn things around in Colorado and make it back to the NHL someday.

Next we meet Yakupov's friend and teammate, Alex Galchenyuk. He's introduced to us with a shot of him making the same face every Montreal fan makes now when they're told that the Habs might have to trade him because mumble mumble they have too much scoring?

"Like his Russian idol Pavel Bure, Nail is also a game-breaker." No, see, he just told us he wasn't like Bure. I thought you were cool, narrator guy.

We close with Yakupov telling us how much he loves to celebrate goals. That part, at least, turned out to be accurate. Remember when he got a little too excited against the Kings and all the old-school guys lost their minds? That was really Yakupov's first memorable NHL moment. Also, as it turns out, his only one.

"Sometimes it's crazy, and it's stupid." Man, he's not even an Oiler yet and he's already memorized the team's front-office slogan.

That ends our clip. If you'd like to live more of the Nail Yakupov experience, here's a clip of him being drafted first overall and being showered with can't-miss praise. And here's a far better one of him immediately afterward, as some poor rep from Upper Deck tries to get him to do some post-draft marketing that he has less than zero interest in. Seriously, I can't recommend that clip enough. I don't know what kind of day you're having at work, but I guarantee it's not "guy who has to get Nail Yakupov to look up and make eye contact long enough to open a pack of hockey cards" bad.

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them. When someone tells you they are not Pavel Bure or Alex Ovechkin, really really believe them." —Maya Angelou, failed NHL scout.

Have a question, suggestion, old YouTube clip, or anything else you'd like to see included in this column? Email Sean at [email protected].

DGB Grab Bag: Free Agency, Contract Announcements, and Draft Busts published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

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madpicks · 7 years

Photo

New Post has been published on https://www.madpicks.com/sports/soccer/__trashed-25/

A beginner’s guide to MLS for 2017

Just now getting into Major League Soccer? We can help.

You can find the entire 2017 MLS season preview here!

What is MLS?

Well, you didn’t call it “the MLS,” which is a good start. Major League Soccer is a 22-year-old professional soccer league featuring teams from the United States and Canada. Creating the league was a requirement for the U.S. hosting the 1994 World Cup and despite some bumps (two teams were contracted in 2001) the league will grow to 24 teams by 2020 and is already working on plans to grow to at least 28, has stadiums all over the country, and no longer has teams with names like “the Wiz” or “the Clash” (sadly). It does, however, have a “Real Salt Lake,” a “Sporting Kansas City,” and will have three “Uniteds” — none of which united anything, except the haters — so it’s not perfect.

Are the players actually any good?

If you’re used to watching the likes of Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo play, MLS players will probably disappoint. But that’s not really a very fair comparison. Although there are no world-class talents in the league, the level of play is actually fairly high, and it’s only getting better. A few years ago a lack of quality was a major issue, but the league’s come along in leaps and bounds recently, and boasts some very watchable matches as well as some household names.

Most of the United States national team is here now, several returning after successful stints in Europe. The likes of Giovanni dos Santos, Sebastian Giovinco, David Villa and Kaká are making themselves right at home, while aging English legends Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard found it much tougher than they had probably envisioned before both retired.

Who’s the best team?

That’s a great question. The field seems to be pretty wide open, as it perpetually is. The Seattle Sounders are the defending champions, although they were far from the best team last year. But they did manage to win the title without much contribution from Clint Dempsey, and he appears to be healthy again. Toronto FC might have the most talent, were a penalty shootout away from winning last year, and looked poised for another strong run.

The LA Galaxy have retooled around Mexican star dos Santos, adding Romain Alessandrini from Ligue 1 and the Portland Timbers added some impressive pieces, most notably Lanus’ Sebastian Blanco. And while it’s probably too early to call them a MLS Cup contender, even expansion side Atlanta United looks pretty stacked.

What’s all this stuff I’ve heard about messing with offsides and not allowing draws?

We prefer to pretend that the 1990s never happened. Don’t worry, MLS plays by normal FIFA rules now. However, the league is planning to become one of the first to roll out video replay — around midseason if FIFA gives the green light.

Why else should I pay attention?

Because it’s fun, mostly. MLS fans have imported most of the best bits of worldwide soccer culture — the tifo (soccerese for “big awesome drawing”), the mass chanting, the flags — and managed to avoid things like stabbing each other in the legs for wearing the wrong colors.

Troy Wayrynen-USA TODAY Sports

There’s also a sense of parity that just doesn’t exist in most soccer leagues. Enough teams make it to the playoffs to keep things interesting, and even the worst teams one season can improve enough in one winter to be contenders in the next. Going into the league’s 22nd season, 11 different teams have won MLS Cup and just as many have won the Supporters’ Shield.

If you’re into scarves, being an MLS fan will help add to your collection while keeping your neck toasty and warm. MLS is also great if you’re into guys with chainsaws. Although that won’t help keep you warm unless you’re really into guys with chainsaws.

There’s seriously a guy with a chainsaw?

Yes. Sadly, he does not feature on the field of play, though we’re sure the Timbers will continue to petition the league to make that happen.

Is it really a professional league if the stadium is quiet and empty?

No, it’s not, but MLS doesn’t have that problem. The league averages more than 21,000 fans per match, which is good for eighth best in the world. The league is also poised to break its own attendance record for a fourth straight year with two new teams coming in — one of whom has already sold 55,000 tickets to their opener — and yet another new stadium scheduled to open.

Joe Nicholson-USA TODAY Sports

If you want atmosphere, check out Seattle, where 44,000 screaming and singing fans is the norm and an estimated crowd of 70,000 flooded downtown for their MLS Cup victory parade (above). Those crowds could be rivaled in Atlanta while their Pacific Northwest neighbors, Portland, match that passion. Heck, if you look almost anywhere in the league, you can find a few hundred lubricated fans banded together as a supporters’ group screaming obscenities at the other team’s best player.

And how does the multiple trophy thing work?

The league itself awards two major trophies at the end of each year. The first goes to the team that finishes the regular-season with the most points for which they receive the Supporters’ Shield. Aside from a trophy — and some level of pride — that team also receives home-field advantage in the playoffs.

The MLS Cup is awarded to the team that wins the playoffs. They tweaked the format a little back in 2015, and now allow six teams from each conference (so 12 total). The top two clubs get byes to the conference semifinals; seeds Nos. 4 and 5 and seeds Nos. 3 and 6 have to face off for the right to get there. The winners from each conference meet in the MLS Cup; the winner is the league champion.

There are also three further major competitions in which an MLS team might be involved, the U.S. Open Cup, the Voyageurs Cup (aka the Canadian Championship) and the CONCACAF Champions League. The former is a knockout tournament open to every team in the United States Soccer Federation (think England’s FA Cup), the Voyageurs Cup is the rough Canadian equivalent and the Champions League is a competition between the top sides in leagues around North America, Central America and the Caribbean. No MLS side has won it in its current format, but they’re getting closer and (theoretically) will one day defeat their Mexican overlords.

Will there ever be promotion and relegation in MLS?

Look, a squirrel!

Sorry for asking. Where did the new teams come from, then?

Just like they do in the other big American sports leagues, they bought their way in. This year, MLS added Atlanta United and Minnesota United. Minnesota had actually been playing in the lower leagues, while Atlanta was created entirely from scratch. In 2018, Los Angeles FC is expected to join. Although David Beckham’s Miami team seems rather ill-fated, they will theoretically begin play in the near future of some alternative timeline. Additionally, a group of at least 12 other cities have already formally entered the process to get the league to 28 teams by 2024.

Do these new teams already have fans?

A lot even! In addition to selling 55,000 tickets to their home opener, Atlanta United has nearly 30,000 season-ticket holders. Minnesota United’s numbers aren’t quite as awe-inspiring, but they’ll have more than 30,000 fans at their home opener and will likely have nearly 12,000 season-ticket holders of their own.

Where are they playing?

Both will open in college football stadiums. While that may seem like a return to the bad old days of MLS, know that Atlanta will be moving into a state-of-the-art stadium designed for both soccer and American football at midseason, while Minnesota will have a soccer palace of their own in 2018.

Does anyone understand the roster rules? What is the “allocation order?”

OK, so the roster rules are a little bit involved. They’re also a little bit … fluid. The short version of this answer is that the structure of the league means the players are actually employed by MLS rather than their teams. The rules for bringing in overseas players are murky at best and made up on the spot at worst. The short version is “no,” there are not many people who have a truly thorough understanding of the roster rules. There is, at last, a limited form of free agency within the league, but that’s only served to add another layer of complication.

As for allocation order, it’s probably best not to ask. That could be its own post by itself. Just let your favorite team’s GM sort it out.

What is a Designated Player?

Since the league is salary capped, it’s difficult to bribe convince someone like David Beckham to work on his tan raise the league’s profile by coming to Los Angeles. And so, when the LA Galaxy acquired David Beckham, a new rule was born: Teams can use a “Designated Player” spot, which counts for a fixed amount on the salary cap, then pay the DP whatever they want. Currently, teams are allowed up to three DPs. Every team has at least one of those players and at least half of them are using all three spots.

What’s with all the weird team names?

When a new league tries to draw off about five different naming conventions at once, what tends to result is a big mess. There are clubs with traditional sounding English names (D.C. United), others that go in for something more European (Real Salt Lake), ones with standard US-franchise names (Chicago Fire), one that is simply named after its owner (New York Red Bulls) and a few more that are reborn NASL teams (like the Sounders). The latest trend is for teams to add “SC” to their names, so now we have Columbus Crew SC and Orlando City SC. That’s “soccer club,” in case you were wondering.

The most reasonable explanation for this is that MLS is still relatively young and went through a significant portion of its history trying to figure out what it wants to be. The best way to handle the issue is to say your sillily-named team does it right and to then relentlessly mock everyone else’s sillily-named team.

What about all these teams with ‘2’ in their name?

That’s another relatively new wrinkle to MLS. Starting in 2014, teams were allowed to launch stand-alone reserve teams that would play in the now second-division USL. LA Galaxy II were the only MLS-owned team in the league last year, but they’ll be joined by eight other MLS-owned teams this year. Among them are the equally-cleverly-named Sounders 2, Timbers 2, Toronto FC II, Whitecaps 2 and Red Bulls II.

It’s “football.” Stop calling it soccer.

How does it feel to hold the same opinion as Piers Morgan? Does it feel bad? You should feel bad.

#MLS

0 notes

junker-town · 7 years

Text

A beginner’s guide to MLS for 2017

Just now getting into Major League Soccer? We can help.

You can find the entire 2017 MLS season preview here!

What is MLS?

Well, you didn't call it “the MLS,” which is a good start. Major League Soccer is a 22-year-old professional soccer league featuring teams from the United States and Canada. Creating the league was a requirement for the U.S. hosting the 1994 World Cup and despite some bumps (two teams were contracted in 2001) the league will grow to 24 teams by 2020 and is already working on plans to grow to at least 28, has stadiums all over the country, and no longer has teams with names like “the Wiz” or “the Clash” (sadly). It does, however, have a “Real Salt Lake,” a “Sporting Kansas City,” and will have three “Uniteds” — none of which united anything, except the haters — so it's not perfect.

Are the players actually any good?

If you're used to watching the likes of Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo play, MLS players will probably disappoint. But that's not really a very fair comparison. Although there are no world-class talents in the league, the level of play is actually fairly high, and it's only getting better. A few years ago a lack of quality was a major issue, but the league's come along in leaps and bounds recently, and boasts some very watchable matches as well as some household names.

Who's the best team?

That's a great question. The field seems to be pretty wide open, as it perpetually is. The Seattle Sounders are the defending champions, although they were far from the best team last year. But they did manage to win the title without much contribution from Clint Dempsey, and he appears to be healthy again. Toronto FC might have the most talent, were a penalty shootout away from winning last year, and looked poised for another strong run.

What's all this stuff I've heard about messing with offsides and not allowing draws?

We prefer to pretend that the 1990s never happened. Don't worry, MLS plays by normal FIFA rules now. However, the league is planning to become one of the first to roll out video replay — around midseason if FIFA gives the green light.

Why else should I pay attention?

Because it's fun, mostly. MLS fans have imported most of the best bits of worldwide soccer culture — the tifo (soccerese for “big awesome drawing”), the mass chanting, the flags — and managed to avoid things like stabbing each other in the legs for wearing the wrong colors.

Troy Wayrynen-USA TODAY Sports

There's also a sense of parity that just doesn't exist in most soccer leagues. Enough teams make it to the playoffs to keep things interesting, and even the worst teams one season can improve enough in one winter to be contenders in the next. Going into the league’s 22nd season, 11 different teams have won MLS Cup and just as many have won the Supporters’ Shield.

If you're into scarves, being an MLS fan will help add to your collection while keeping your neck toasty and warm. MLS is also great if you're into guys with chainsaws. Although that won't help keep you warm unless you're really into guys with chainsaws.

There's seriously a guy with a chainsaw?

Yes. Sadly, he does not feature on the field of play, though we’re sure the Timbers will continue to petition the league to make that happen.

Is it really a professional league if the stadium is quiet and empty?

No, it's not, but MLS doesn't have that problem. The league averages more than 21,000 fans per match, which is good for eighth best in the world. The league is also poised to break its own attendance record for a fourth straight year with two new teams coming in — one of whom has already sold 55,000 tickets to their opener — and yet another new stadium scheduled to open.

Joe Nicholson-USA TODAY Sports

If you want atmosphere, check out Seattle, where 44,000 screaming and singing fans is the norm and an estimated crowd of 70,000 flooded downtown for their MLS Cup victory parade (above). Those crowds could be rivaled in Atlanta while their Pacific Northwest neighbors, Portland, match that passion. Heck, if you look almost anywhere in the league, you can find a few hundred lubricated fans banded together as a supporters' group screaming obscenities at the other team's best player.

And how does the multiple trophy thing work?

The league itself awards two major trophies at the end of each year. The first goes to the team that finishes the regular-season with the most points for which they receive the Supporters' Shield. Aside from a trophy — and some level of pride — that team also receives home-field advantage in the playoffs.

There are also three further major competitions in which an MLS team might be involved, the U.S. Open Cup, the Voyageurs Cup (aka the Canadian Championship) and the CONCACAF Champions League. The former is a knockout tournament open to every team in the United States Soccer Federation (think England's FA Cup), the Voyageurs Cup is the rough Canadian equivalent and the Champions League is a competition between the top sides in leagues around North America, Central America and the Caribbean. No MLS side has won it in its current format, but they're getting closer and (theoretically) will one day defeat their Mexican overlords.

Will there ever be promotion and relegation in MLS?

Look, a squirrel!

Sorry for asking. Where did the new teams come from, then?

Do these new teams already have fans?

Where are they playing?

Does anyone understand the roster rules? What is the “allocation order?”

OK, so the roster rules are a little bit involved. They're also a little bit ... fluid. The short version of this answer is that the structure of the league means the players are actually employed by MLS rather than their teams. The rules for bringing in overseas players are murky at best and made up on the spot at worst. The short version is “no,” there are not many people who have a truly thorough understanding of the roster rules. There is, at last, a limited form of free agency within the league, but that’s only served to add another layer of complication.

As for allocation order, it's probably best not to ask. That could be its own post by itself. Just let your favorite team’s GM sort it out.

What is a Designated Player?

Since the league is salary capped, it's difficult to bribe convince someone like David Beckham to work on his tan raise the league's profile by coming to Los Angeles. And so, when the LA Galaxy acquired David Beckham, a new rule was born: Teams can use a “Designated Player” spot, which counts for a fixed amount on the salary cap, then pay the DP whatever they want. Currently, teams are allowed up to three DPs. Every team has at least one of those players and at least half of them are using all three spots.

What's with all the weird team names?

What about all these teams with '2' in their name?

That's another relatively new wrinkle to MLS. Starting in 2014, teams were allowed to launch stand-alone reserve teams that would play in the now second-division USL. LA Galaxy II were the only MLS-owned team in the league last year, but they'll be joined by eight other MLS-owned teams this year. Among them are the equally-cleverly-named Sounders 2, Timbers 2, Toronto FC II, Whitecaps 2 and Red Bulls II.

It's “football.” Stop calling it soccer.

How does it feel to hold the same opinion as Piers Morgan? Does it feel bad? You should feel bad.

0 notes