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the-wrong-damn-way · 3 years

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When Words Fail

In which the Maitlands notice you are refusing to talk to them as of late

When I tell y’all this is one of my favorite pieces to reread when I need to c r y

MAITLANDS > BEETLEJUICE (sorry not sorry)

Also, if you are Adam or Barbara Maitlands, please contact me. I have some adoption papers for you to sign.

The Maitlands were confused.

When you and your younger sister Lydia Deetz discovered that the house was haunted by two friendly ghosts, you two were ecstatic. It was something your mother would’ve loved to see, and Adam and Barbara Maitland just gave off this warm and friendly vibe that was welcoming and infectious. Whereas Lydia saw them as an opportunity to get the Deetz family back to New York, you saw the Maitlands as they were: a couple who were kind, caring, middle-class, suburban, and white. They were just a regular couple, minus the whole being dead thing.

The Maitlands, in your opinion, were the most suitable people to be parents, and during the whole Beetlejuice incident, your bond with them increased. They kept you safe from the demon’s antics, making sure no harm befell you as his anger festered into rage when your little sister jumped into a portal to the Netherworld. They refused to allow you to offer yourself in Lydia’s place (which concerned you to the extreme, she was your little sister and it was your sole duty to keep her from harm), instead keeping you hidden from his sight.

Over the course of the next few months after the fake marriage and the murder of Beetlejuice, your bond with the Maitlands undeniably grew stronger. On nights you were stressed out, you found yourself creeping into the attic to have calming conversations with the ghosts. On the days you were upset with your father or Delia, sometimes even Lydia, you dismissed yourself from your current activity to join Adam in a game of checkers or Barbara with a classic game of Go Fish. When dinner conversations went haywire, you’d make up an excuse to leave the table and headed to the attic to read a random book with the Maitlands (Adam would read to you and Barbara would let you rest your head on her legs as she ran her fingers soothingly through your hair).

And of course, if you didn’t get enough to eat during dinner, Barbara and Adam would sneak along with you into the kitchen for midnight snacks that would surely stuff you so that you wouldn’t go hungry.

But for the last two weeks, the Maitlands noticed your appearance in their part of the house slowly disappearing. On a scheduled game night, you didn’t show up. You apologized the next morning and kept the chit-chat to a minimum. Not wanting to seem creepy and intrude on your privacy, the deceased couple tried their best to stay out of your business, but always struck up a conversation with you whenever they could. They missed having your normal long talks about whatever came to mind, the subject always switching just to keep the three of you talking.

It took them awhile, but Adam was the first to finally catch on to what you were doing. He suggested the idea of you avoiding them on purpose to Barbara, and her eyes widened. She thought you were comfortable with Adam and herself, that you were just avoiding conversation because you couldn’t seem to hold onto one in the recent days. Barbara never took into consideration that you might’ve been avoiding them purposefully and the thought struck right through her heart.

Just to see if their little theory was true, the Maitlands took their seats at the dinner table one night, after being offered to join the Deetz for a family dinner by Lydia. The deceased couple chatted quietly with the Deetzes, short bursts of laughter and chuckles here and there throughout the whole dinner. The whole time, though, Barbara noticed that your chair remained empty.

“Where’s Y/N?” the blonde ghost asked the living family. Everything went quiet, and Barbara believed she was onto something.

“They haven't been leaving their room recently,” Lydia broke the uncomfortable silence with her answer. She stabbed the spaghetti that was on her plate with her fork, twirling it in her hand mindlessly. “If they didn’t answer their phone when I texted them, I would’ve thought them to be dead.”

“Lydia!” Both Charles and Delia scolded the gothy teenager. She sat up straight and shrugged.

“It’s not like I’m wrong!” Lydia argued, turning to face her father and step-mother.

Before they could witness the argument between the adults and their child, Adam and Barbara quietly excused themselves from the dinner table. They marched silently up the stairs to the attic, shutting the door behind them softly. Immediately, the two began pacing.

So, yes, the Maitlands had never been more confused in their afterlives.

And yes, having a bio-exorcist tormenting them and then making sexual innuendos was something they were still confused about, but the burning question of why you would be avoiding them was top of their list.

“Did we do something wrong?” Adam voiced the idea. Barbara stopped her pacing, looking up to meet her husband’s gaze.

“They would tell us if we did something,” Barbara countered. Slowly, though, the dark thought wormed itself into her head. She took a hesitant step towards Adam. “They would, right?”

Adam closed the distance between them, taking her hands in his. “Of course they would, honey. I’m just spitballing ideas here.” He rubbed his thumbs over the back of Barbara’s hands as a soothing gesture, and the blonde nodded.

“You’re right,” she mumbled. “Maybe they are just-”

A soft thump from the room underneath the attic was heard, and the Maitlands jumped, breaking their hold on each other. Both of their eyes widened as they recalled that your room was under their space, and a dark thought struck them both. After all, if Lydia was suicidal once, who was to say you weren’t. Adam and Barbara scrambled towards the attic door, practically ripping it off of its hinges as they hurried down the stairs.

When they got to your room, they didn’t know what they were expecting to find. They definitely didn’t expect to find you hunched over your desk, a clenched fist on the top of the wooden piece of furniture. You had earbuds in, blasting music to muffle all outside noises, and a tear rolled down your cheek before landing on the piece of sketch paper you were currently drawing on. Your eyes were puffy from crying, and the small trash can near the side of the desk was practically filled to the brim with dirty tissues and crumpled up pieces of paper. Barbara covered her mouth with a hand, suddenly feeling the urge to cry.

Here you were, vulnerable to the world, and the Maitlands never knew.

Before Adam could protest about invading your personal space, Barbara walked over to where you were sitting and knelt beside you. She placed a cold hand on your shoulder and you jumped, moving yourself away from the hand and ripping the earbuds out of your ears. Your eyes were blurry from crying and you wiped away the tears with the back of your hands, trying to stop yourself from letting out muffled hiccups. However, your body didn’t comply, and a new stream of tears were flowing down your cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized through sobs, wrapping your arms around your torso. Adam entered the room as Barbara walked over to you and embraced you into a loving hug, and you broke down once again. Another ‘I’m sorry’ left your sore throat as you wrapped your arms around Barbara, holding onto the female specter as much as you could. She shushed your apologies, instead rubbing her a hand in gentle circles on your back, hoping to calm you down.

God, you thought. This is embarrassing. You didn’t expect anyone to actually come check up on you, and having the Maitlands do it made you even more emotional. You didn’t remember how long you’ve been avoiding your favorite deceased couple. The only thing you could recall was the one-year anniversary of your mother’s death, and things only seemed to go downhill.

Once your sobs had turned to occasional sniffles, Barbara guided you over to your bed, and the two of you took a seat on the side. Adam sat on the other side of you, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder, and you leaned into him, resting your head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around your body, leaning his head on top of yours, and Barbara placed her hand overtop of yours.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled once more.

“What for, kiddo?” Adam asked you.

“For avoiding you guys,” you answered. “I didn’t mean to, I swear. It just sort of happened.” You pulled away from Adam and stared at the floor. “I’ve been trying to come out and talk to you guys, but I guess you just remind me so much of my mother. Her one-year anniversary passed a while ago and I guess I fell into a pit without meaning too. I’m sorry-”

Barbara turned so that she was facing you and placed a finger on your lips. “Slow down, Y/N. You don’t need to tell us anymore if you don’t want to.” She removed her finger and placed her hand on your cheek, rubbing her thumb in a circular motion. “Just know that Adam and I will always be here for you, hun, okay?” You nodded, closing your eyes as the blonde brushed away a few stray tears.

“I, uh, have something for you guys.” You stood up from the bed and grabbed your sketchbook from the desk, flicking through some of the pages until you landed on the one you wanted to present to the Maitlands. You sat back down and both of them leaned over your shoulder with curiosity, and you were greeted with gasps.

You don’t recall when you drew the sketch, but it was your favorite one that was based off of a photo that Lydia had sent you one night. Barbara and Adam sat on both ends of the couch, with you stretched across it in the middle. You were asleep, as was Adam with his reading glasses practically dangling off of his nose, and Barbara was laughing, running her fingers through your hair as Lydia took the picture. Underneath it in cursive you had written a Disney quote that stuck in your mind.

Ohana means family, and family means no one gets left behind. Or forgotten.

Two pairs of arms wrapped around you tightly, and you jumped from the unexpected contact.

“Y/N,” Barbara cooed, planting a kiss on the top of your head. “That’s absolutely adorable!”

“We definitely are a family, kiddo.” He looked at the sketch once again, and pointed out the glasses on his face. “Also, you’re telling me I looked like that when I sleep?” You and Barbara chuckled, and you nudged him with your shoulder.

“I’m surprised I was able to sleep with how loud you snore,” you teased, and Adam scoffed, pushing you gently into Barbara. The laughter and chuckling eventually died down, and you all laid back on your bed, looking up at the glow-in-the-dark stars you had decorated your ceiling with. There was a comfortable silence, and you smiled.

“Hey guys?” The Maitlands hummed, letting you know that they were listening. “Thank you for being there for me.” Adam grabbed one of your hands, Barbara doing the same, and both of them gave you a gentle squeeze.

“Of course, Y/N.”

“Anything for you, kiddo. You should know this by now.”

“I love you guys,” you murmured quietly. And with the way they each squeezed your hand, you took it that they heard you.

“We love you too, kiddo. We love you too.”

#beetlejuice #adam maitland #lydia deetz #barbara maitland #beetlejuice the musical #the maitlands #beetlejuice fanfic #the maitlands x reader #beetlejuice x reader #beetlejuice broadway #bjtmtmtm #bjtm

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wizisbored · 2 years

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Ok to start I absolutely loved the start of bitb 2, loved lydia interacting with sky like that. Lydia confusing all the nurses is so funny to me I love it. I kinda had an idea here, cuz lydia’s gonna be spending a lot of time in the hospital, and I kinda feel like she’d see a bunch of ghosts bc duh it’s a hospital, and also I find it hard to believe everyone follows the rule book. I feel like there’s at least a few who saw that rule and just went no <3 I’m not going to this netherworld. Haven’t decided if they’re nice or they keep being mean or bug her, in which beej would scare them away. If he can’t scare any of the breathers some ghosts bothering lydia will do.

Also ohhhhh ohhhhh that angsty bugebroph concept is just so >>>>>>

Like I imagine beej just suggested the first born child thing as like a cliche dramatic moment and when charles agrees, internally he’s just like that was??? A joke??? And you seriously just gave up your daughter that quickly???? Ok cool so I’m taking her far away from this piece of shit. Lydia’s initially kinda pissed at bj but it doesn't last between “kid I suggested the whole first born thing as a joke” the fact that her father agreed so quickly and the fact that beej is pretty chill. I’m kinda imagining her as reg bugebroph but with More Rage.

Also just had this thought of emily recovering and charles explaining what happened and emilys rightfully pissed and just straight up leaves him and immediately leaves to find an actual legit psychic or medium or whoever she can find to try and contact this demon again and get her daughter back

aw thanks! i was a little nervous about starting the sequel because obviously it couldnt open with the same impact the first did, so im glad you like it! definately looking forward to writing more of lydia and skye. i did consider hospital ghosts but it would be this whole new thing to add (but i do actually have an in-universe excuse for the lack of ghosts.) definately fun to think about tho, im imagining a bbc ghosts type situation where theyre all mildly annoying but ultimately harmless and lydia is their long-suffering medium.

and as for the firstborn au i am so ready to develop and talk about this shit fuck yea. was definately thinking about beej quickly realising that charles probably shouldnt have this kid if hes so willing to give her to a fucking demon. but lydia, yeah shes definately angry but shes also fucking scared. tries not to show it but like this is terrifying for the poor kid and she really has no way to know that beetlejuice is telling the truth about having no real motive to take her. its going to take a while for her to start trusting him. and what makes her different from bugebroph is that bug is entirely comfortable among ghosts and demons and sees herself as more one of them than a breather, whereas here lydia didnt even know ghosts existed and now suddenly shes wrapped up in the supernatural (plus, im not sure id have her spend as much time in the netherworld as bugebroph. if im going to develop this seperately i want to go in another direction yknw). dont get me wrong though theres definately a lot of rage going on here at almost everyone involved in this situation. its lydia against the world, from her perspective.

also yeah charles is gonna get his arse Divorced like what the fuck dude? i know im the one who made him do this but like how did he think this would go.

#bitb2 fic #firstborn au #long post #would VERY much like to continue talking about the firstborn au is anyone wants to send asks about it im liking this concept

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stilitana · 2 years

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time for new year's day review of what i read last year...i'm very happy with the reading i did, much of it was so good for me...i read 41 books which sounds like way more than i remember so here are highlights

cannot believe how slippery time has gotten because i was so sure the first book i read this year was stone butch blues, but no, that was 2020. the first book i read was house fires by nancy reisman and i really liked this collection of three parts of interlinked stories. the end made me tear up.

other short story collections i liked:

i hold a wolf by the ears by laura van den berg (very spooky in a low-key way, if it had a soundtrack it would be all synth)

a visit from the goon squad by jennifer egan

birds of america by lorrie moore

monstress by lysley tenorio

kolyma stories by varlam shalamov (not all 1k pages but quite a bit)

trash by dorothy allison (one of my favorite things i read this year)

some novels i liked:

interior chinatown by charles yu (this was so fun, so playful and inventive with the form and structure)

milkman by anna burns

the end of days by jenny erpenbeck (this one was really, really good and challenging)

the underground railroad by colson whitehead

there there by tommy orange (i listened to him give a zoom reading and his voice + audio quality sounded like the godspeed you! black emperor monologue in dead flag blues)

luster by raven leilani

housekeeping by marilynne robinson

freshwater by akwaeke emezi

i finished the brothers K but that took me 4 years so don't get full 2021 credit for that one

i also read some novels that were truly atrocious but i don't want to think about them so moving on

novellas: i love novellas so so so much a good novella is such good shit, it gives you the urgency & brutal efficiency of short story but lets it stretch out and simmer like a novel...some of my fav things are novellas

mcglue by ottessa moshfegh (this is my favorite thing i've read of hers so far...perfect length for the story just perfect would likely have been an atrocious novel)

things have gotten worse since we last spoke by eric larocca (honestly didn't know this one was causing minor internet controversies when i read it but tbh getting to analyze reader reactions to the story & author made it more interesting to me, otherwise wouldn't really have thought much of it, but it absorbed me for an evening)

khirbet khizeh by s. yizhar

sofia petrovna by lydia chukovskaya (this was a reread)

minor detail by adania shibli (this is one of my top things i read all year. maybe the best thing i read all year. absolutely astonishing it cracked my brain open. i'm going to read it again some day.)

i didn't read much poetry. i did read mistaken for loud comets by lily someson and it was brilliant, loved it. also IRL by tommy pico

memoirs/essay/nonfic:

i started secondhand time, but i'm going to return to that and give it a fresh start, maybe this year

s/he by minnie bruce patt

butch is a noun by s. bear bergman (i'm in love w him i'm reading the nearest exit may be behind you now)

gender failure by ivan coyote and rae spoon

in the dream house by carmen maria machado

i didn't really read any genre fiction this year...i tried gideon the ninth but didn't get far, maybe another time. i have some i really want to get to, some sci fi stuff, but i guess this year instead of putting in the effort to get cracking on that, i just read fic instead, which is usually my easy go-to when i'm craving what i tend to want when i reach for genre fiction, which is...to not be wherever i currently am, physically or emotionally...which means that honestly i tend not to remember most of the fics i read because i'm devouring them in states of high anxiety & insomnia lol. but one i really really remember and still think about is this blade runner one, conspiracies of the body by geometrician, maybe because the quality and style struck me as so novelistic that it snapped me out of my usual mindless fic speed reading and i actually felt like i was reading a really original gritty neo-noir sci fi cyberpunk type novel. it was good i'll read it again sometime

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demonwifey · 4 years

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Hey! Love your works, btw, it's really cute! Anyway..That's not what I'm here for. I'm here for a writing prompt? Request? Whatever: Basically I wanna see someone write headcannons/fanfics on loneliness. Yes, I know it's a deep and sad topic, but I want some cuddles with the bug boio

Thank you so much anon!💗💗💗 And thank you guys so much for being patient with me. I haven’t posted in a while because I was in a little bit of a slump. But I’m gonna do my best to put out more some more stuff. Hope you guys enjoy!💜🖤💚

Beetlejuice x fem!reader

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of abusive parents

Word count: 3,602

What’s the one thing you and Beetlejuice had in common? You were both lonely. And it’s crazy how similar your stories were.

Beetlejuice had been alone his whole afterlife. His mother was a demon and a bitch, stuck raising a child she didn’t even want. And to do it all alone, she took her anger and frustration out on the only person around, Beetlejuice. She abused him both mentally and physically. She made him think he was something no one, not even her, could love. And for the longest, he believed it.

Your parents didn’t want you either, but they tried so hard to not show it. Your mother got pregnant in senior year of high school. To which both of their lives had to halt. While they did still graduate, college became a push back. The two of them had to find jobs to support you and themselves. They weren’t as harsh as Juno but they weren’t saints either. Making off-hand comments or blaming you for the way their lives turned out. There was barely a day when you didn’t hear “If it wasn’t for you, I could’ve been…”. The things you are never supposed to say to your child, they would say to you.

Even after you turned 18, you still needed to stay home. At least for those 4 years you needed for college. Once you got that out the way, you were on your own. Finally moving into your own house.

Beetlejuice finally found the family he wanted for so long. But now everything was crumbling underneath him. Lydia was 18 and now going off to college herself. Once they dropped her off at school, Charles and Delia were off to enjoy a vacation now that they had time to themselves. Adam and Barbara still had things to figure out in the Netherworld. So while they still would come home at the end of the day, they weren’t around as much. Beej was in desperate need for something to occupy his time. It was boring being in the Deetzes house with no one around. And if he couldn't scare the neighbors with Lydia, what was the point?

And that’s when you came into the picture. Beej’s powers allowed him to see and hear almost everything around the neighborhood. So, of course he had to watch you while you moved in. Without realizing it, you were only a few blocks away from the Deetz’s home. When you first arrived in town, you remember being curious about the strange looking house at the top of the hill. Your friends joked about it possibly being haunted, trying to scare you a little, but you only ignored them.

Even though they helped you unload the cars, you insisted that you didn’t need help unpacking. It would give you some time to yourself. Once they said their goodbyes, you started to notice the eerie energy of the house on the hill. It was a while away and looked so small from your window. Get it together, YN, you thought. This was the first time in your own house. You couldn’t let yourself get scared and huddle up in the corner like a baby. Everything’s scary when you’re on your own. You just gotta get used to it.

It really didn’t take much for Beetlejuice to show up. As funny as it would’ve been for him to scare you and your friends all together, he waited until they left. There was no limit to the fun he could have scaring this unbeknownst breather while you were alone.

Once he emerged into the house, he saw you were still unpacking boxes. There were random items and boxes scattered everywhere. The smile on his face was nothing less than evil. You were making this way too easy for him.

You were bent down, rummaging through a box or silverware and other kitchen items. You thought, at least you could start unboxing something easy. Of course, Beetlejuice wouldn’t be Beetlejuice if he didn’t stare at your ass while you leaned over. As he got closer, he realized your ass wasn’t the only great thing on you.

Beetlejuice has been dead for a millennia, which means he’s seen A LOT of breathers. And yet, you seemed to be one of the most beautiful ones he’s seen in a while. Boy, he was about to have fun with you.

While you were unwrapping some cups and placing them on the counter, you heard one of the cabinet doors behind you open. The creaking was so loud, it almost mirrored nails on a chalkboard. You turned around to see it just sitting wide open. Okay, you thought, maybe the hinges are a little too loose. Just something to try and give yourself a little reassurance. You walked over to close the door but before you could, it slammed shut right in front of you.

Umm....nope.

Beej couldn’t help but cackle at your face as you backed away from the cabinet slowly. As he was finished with you yet. He zipped around to the counter. Your back was still turned as he picked up one of the glasses you set down, loosely holding the edge with his finger. He leaned with one elbow on the counter and dropped the glass to the floor, not really needing to put in more effort. Your entire body jumped at the sound of the glass behind you, letting out a mini yelp while doing so.

“Well, aren’t you a cutie pie? Come one, dollface. Let me hear you scream.” Beej spoke as he looked around to see what else he could use to scare you.

This dude basically terrorized you all night long. Knocking stuff over, opening and closing doors, and finding anything to make eerie sounds. It was like you were stuck on the same level of a horror game. It was too late to call your friends back as they were already miles away from you. You didn’t call the police because what were they gonna do? Tase a ghost?

At first you were panicked but you realized that the ghost wasn’t actually going to hurt you. More like freak you out so you couldn’t sleep that night. It was going past midnight and you were still unpacking things here and there. After the last few boxes got knocked over, you had enough. You plopped yourself down on the couch before speaking loudly.

“Alright, ghost or demon or whatever. I’m just gonna assume you’re friendly like Casper since you haven’t done anything to me.”

Even though Beetlejuice was invisible, he was visibly frustrated. Why weren’t you getting scared? You should be screaming and running out of the house in utter fear. After about an hour, whenever he knocked something over, you just stared blankly before picking it back up. No matter what he did you didn’t flinch. Now here you were comparing him to ‘Casper the Friendly Ghost’? Hanging out with Lydia and the Maitlands really made him lose his touch, huh?

The demon man floated his way in front of you, watching as you laid on your side. He could see that you were on the verge of falling asleep, clearly worn out from all the unpacking. Your eyes were fluttering closed as you got comfortable, pulling your legs in towards your stomach and resting your hands under the side of your head.

“Mm, thanks for keeping me company.” You moaned out, your words slurring a little as you dozed off.

Was Beetlejuice about to let such a simple sentence get to him? Yes.

Before even meeting Adam and Barbara, if Beej couldn’t scare a breather, he wouldn’t waste his time. Although he’d be upset by it, he’d count his losses and go. With you he considered it...for like 2 seconds. But he couldn’t look away as you snored softly. He was so entranced at the way your chest rose and fell as you breathed lightly. You seemed so tired but still slept so delicately.

Wait, delicately? Since when was Beej using words like ‘delicately’?

He couldn’t dwell on it too long as you stirred in your sleep. Why did he flinch? You couldn’t even see him. The demon man just bent down watching you, admiring how soft and, again, delicate you looked. He wasn’t sure how long he watched you for until he saw the sun starting to come up.

Did he mean to watch you all night long? No. It just happened, okay?

For a second, he’d forgotten he was invisible to you. When you finally woke up, he flinched and moved backwards once your eyes met his. You only yawned and stretched to help wake yourself up.

You looked around at the left over boxes still scattered around your living room. It seemed like you did so much unpacking but there was still so much left. Rubbing your eyes, you went to make yourself some breakfast. But you stopped, looking at the shattered glass still sitting on the kitchen floor. That’s when you remembered last night’s weird occurrence. The apparent ‘ghost’ in your house had dropped one of your glasses on the floor. Along with making 100 other failed attempts to scare you. It seemed so real but you were also really tired. Maybe you imagined it all.

“Are you still here, ghost? Pfft, probably not-” And then you saw one of the glass shards rise a little into the air and then fall back down. “Okay, nevermind.”

****

So, now you were living with a ghost. You finally get the chance to leave your parents house, and this happens.

You weren’t exactly sure what to make of it. It’s not like the ghost was actually bothering you. You didn’t get scared at its antics anymore, and it even seemed to take on the role as a friendly ghost after a while.

If you were cooking the kitchen and dropped something, it would pick it up and place it back in your hand. Sometimes it would open the door for you when you walked into a room. After you got extremely comfortable with it around, it would even help you with little tasks around the house.

There was more than one occasion where it would hold the flashlight while you needed to hands to fix something.

You couldn’t explain it but you were just glad to have someone around. Even if it was a ghost.

Beetlejuice wasn’t sure what made him want to be around you. A simple answer was that you were an extremely hot breather that he liked looking at. If that was the case he wouldn’t put so much effort into being nice to you. Which is what made it difficult for him to understand.

Being around you filled something in him that he didn’t know needed to be filled.

Spoiler alert: you both are lonely idiots that don’t realize how lonely you are.

One particular night, you came home from your new job extremely worn out. Your position was entry level so they basically treated you like a college intern. “Bring me this, take this here, do this right now.” Were the only things you heard all day. And it didn’t help that your mom had called you as soon as you got home.

She called to ‘check in’ but really it was her putting you down. Making back-handed compliments about finally moving out. Practically insulting you without even being provoked.

To end the night you took and shower and cozied up in your favorite hoodie. While only wearing a pair of panties underneath. You were laid out on your bed, trying to find something to watch on TV. Of course, just because you needed a distraction there was nothing on.

And social media didn’t make you feel any better. All you saw was your friends posting pictures and statuses about hanging out for the weekend. You missed them, and missing them made you miss being back home. And thinking about home made you remember the bullshit your parents put you through. 100 things were running through your head and then suddenly you felt a lump in your throat.

Not far after did the tears start and you couldn’t stop them. You laid on your side, silently sniffling as you cried. You were all alone in your own place and you still were stuck in the habit of crying quietly. What did it matter? No one was there to hear you.

Except for Beetlejuice.

He was having a bit of a rough night too. He’d been hanging around your house all day, which seemed to be the new normal. But just an hour before you got back home, he headed back to the Deetzes house. When he wandered in, he caught Adam and Barbara talking amongst each other, looking even giddier than normal.

Of course, he wouldn’t be Beetlejuice if he didn’t make a crude joke to announce his entrance. Ignoring his distasteful humor, the couple then told him that they just got done talking with Lydia. And Beetlejuice was pissed.

Although any aware person could see Beetlejuice getting physically angry. His hair turning red, fists balling up, and the look on his face was nothing short of utter rage. Even the air around them was getting hot and dense But somehow the Maitlands didn’t notice. Barbara only continued on telling how Lydia was gushing about school. She’d made some new friends, joined the photography club, and all of her classes were going well. She called Charles and Delia on the regular but wanted to give check in on her ghost friends.

Sure, Beetlejuice was happy to hear that for Lydia. But he was still mad he didn’t get to hear it straight from the source. Lydia had been gone for about 2 months and he was missing his best friend. Now the opportunity came to talk to her and he just missed it. With no explanation, he made his way back out of the house. The last thing he heard was them gushing about Lydia having a crush on some girl in her class.

It was something so small but it hurt Beetlejuice. His best friend was growing up without him there to see it. Soon enough she was gonna forget all about him and only focus on her stupid new college friends. And if she didn’t care about him, why would anyone else in the house care? Now his thoughts were hitting some all at once.

Although he couldn’t see, the color in his hair was rapidly changing between red, blue, and purple. He needed a distraction. So he headed back down to you. But when he arrived, he wasn’t met with your normal joyous demeanor.

You were huddled up on your bed, crying and whimpering. So softly it almost sounded like the squeaks of a tiny mouse. Although small streaks of red were still there, more purple took over his hair. So he wasn’t the only one having a bad day.

Beetlejuice wasn’t exactly sure if he should’ve bothered you or not. He wasn’t sure what was wrong or how he could help in any way. He had his own problems to sit on so maybe he’d just chill in your living room and blow off his steam there. As he went to float out of the room, he heard you speak.

“I don’t know if you’re still here or not, ghost. But I could really use some company right about now.” You hiccuped out. You hated to sound like a child but fuck it. Talk to a ghost or not talk at all? The first seemed like the better option.

You sat up for a second, looking around for a sign that the ghost was actually near. You got a response with one of your pillows lifting up to hit you on the thigh. You let out a small huff and giggle mix, thinking about how if this was 2 months ago, you would’ve been scared out of your mind. You wiped away some of your tears as you sat up fully.

“I know you probably don’t wanna hear me whining though. I think just knowing someone’s around makes me feel a little better.” As if to tell you it was okay the pillow hit your thigh again, causing you to laugh even more. Still a little hesitant, you talked about your day. It felt good to get your feelings out, even if it looked like you were just talking to a pillow.

You weren’t sure how long you had talked for, all you know is that it was getting late and you were getting tired. Your face felt puffy from the crying, at certain points you had to stop and let out a few tears here and there before finishing the story. Without even realizing, you laid your head down to get more comfortable.

“Why don’t you tell me about your day, ghost. I’m listening, I promise.” You quietly spoke, even if you felt your eyes starting to flutter closed.

“Pff, babycakes, you won’t believe the day I’ve had.” He knew good and well you couldn’t hear him but it felt good to vent. He held the pillow as he talked; he would walk or float around the room with it in his hands. Since you could only see the pillow, you could only assume the ghost was speaking like you asked.

You were in and out of sleep while Beetlejuice talked but he didn’t mind. You were making an effort to still stay awake for him and that’s all that mattered. Plus, he loved how cute you looked when you tried to keep your eyes open. After a while, he looked at the clock sitting on your bedside table. 2:16 a.m. He stopped floating around and was standing by the side of your bed.

“Mmmm, are you done, ghost?” You spoke with your eyes finally fluttering closed for the night.

Something about the way you looked made Beetlejuice’s dead heart flutter. So peaceful and comfortable. You couldn’t see him yet you knew he was there, and you weren’t afraid of his presence. Unbeknownst to him, his hair was slowly fading into a baby pink color. Without thinking, he dropped the pillow floated over to the opposite side of your bed, your back now facing towards him.

Not putting much thought into it, he crawled onto the soft surface. Before he knew it, he was laying behind you and slowly wrapping one arm around your waist. The small amount of heat that came from your body warmed up the front of his. It was nice, he thought.

“I think I can feel you, ghost.” Beetlejuice stiffened against you. He would’ve jumped backwards if you didn’t rest your hand over the one he had on your stomach. You more than likely felt the small chill coming from his body without actually feeling him. You couldn’t feel him. It wasn’t possible. But your hand on his calmed him more than he would ever tell.

“You’re breaking my heart, doll. You don’t have to keep calling me that. Call me BJ.” He spoke quietly. Or so he thought.

“BJ? That’s a cute name.” You said, shocking Beetlejuice completely. Fuck, he’d been a demon for how long and he’d completely forgotten that he could throw his voice. It didn’t seem to matter though. You were basically in a sleepy daze, so it didn’t really click that you had heard a random voice echo off your walls.

“Thanks for sticking around, BJ.” You whispered before letting yourself fall asleep entirely. The chill from his presence was giving you goosebumps, even in unconsciousness. Beetlejuice’s cheeks would’ve turned red if his face wasn’t already bone white.

He laid there with you for most of the night. Obviously he didn’t sleep so there was nothing he could do except watch you. Much like the first night you moved in. Except this time you were pressed against him.

It was around 5 in the morning when he decided to poof away. Something about the way your body warmth was making him feel so flustered and overwhelmed. He rested himself in your attic, much like he would often do at the Deetzes.

When you woke up later in the morning, something felt off. You rubbed your eyes before looking around, like you were looking for someone. You were so tired that everything seemed like a dream last night. But even so, your bed felt empty.

Some things were a little foggy but one thing you do remember was the name ‘BJ’. Where it came from, you didn’t really remember. Finally sitting all the way up you saw one of your pillows sitting on the floor. And it hit you. The ghost that was occupying your house was named BJ. And somehow he told you that.

You sat looking at the pillow a second before snorting. “Come one, Y/N. That’s stupid.” You muttered to yourself. It was one thing to have a ghost in your house, but now it was talking to you? And his name was BJ. You must’ve been really out of it, you thought.

Even with your doubts, you still couldn’t shake the empty feeling you felt on your body. You still held onto the name BJ as well. You got off your bed and picked up the pillow off the floor. This all somehow mimicked the first night you moved in.

“BJ,” You mumbled to yourself. “Maybe it’s not such a crazy idea.”

Hope you guys enjoyed and thanks for reading!💜🖤💚

#beetlejuice x reader #beetlejuice fanfiction #Beetlejuice the musical #beetlejuice musical #beetlejuice headcanons #anon asks #anon requests

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beetlelands · 3 years

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im just gonna post some of these back to back bc why not. this draft is from october 2019 and is aptly titled “ruh roh ghost lad." but this is the one where beej gets stuck as a ghost in the maitland-deetz house

With a poof, Beetlejuice was on the roof of the Maitland-Deetz house. He groaned, opening his eyes. “Where am I?” He questioned quietly, looking around the area. He was quick to recognize his destination. “Wait what no, how did I get here? God/Satan please send me back,” he muttered to himself. He tried his best to teleport himself away, but he couldn’t go anywhere. He tried to fly away but ended up on Saturn so he was quick to fly back to the roof.

Beetlejuice sunk down to his knees, begging to god/satan- or perhaps the person who sent him there in the first place.

“Dammit!” he shouted in frustration, slamming his hand down on the tiling of the roof.

He heard the window begin to rattle as it was being opened. Muttering a string of curses to himself, Beetlejuice teleported himself to the other side of the roof, hiding. He heard the familiar voice of Barbara Maitland say “I told you there’s nothing out here honey, stop being so paranoid.” With that the window shut once more.

Beetlejuice sighed, slumping down the side of the chimney. He was trapped in the plane of the Maitland/Deetz house. The place he was killed- not that he was still salty about that or anything. He refused to believe he was a simple ghost. He was still a demon- he had to be- maybe he was just trapped.

That’s when an idea struck him- he needed to see Lydia. If she said his name three times, he could return to the living plane like before. Sure, it might be hard to get her to say his name, but the two of them were BFFFFs forever. She had to help him, it was his only choice. He needed to get out of there and Lydia was his ticket home.

Begrudgingly, Beetlejuice floated down to Lydia’s room. The blinds were closed, so he knocked on the window. When she opened the blinds, he was out of sight. He phased through the wall and took a seat at the end of the bed. Beetlejuice watched as the girl narrowed her eyes, peering out the window. “Must’ve been a bird,” she shrugged before turning around to see none other than Lawrence Beetlejuice Shoggoth.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“Oh c’mon Lyds, I know you missed me.” Beetlejuice teased, but the girl merely rolled her eyes, giving him a stern look. “Fine, I missed you- no okay even I didn’t believe that.”

She couldn’t help but smile a little at that, “You love me, don’t try to deny it.” The demon pretended to throw up, which caused Lydia to laugh but she was quick to stop herself. She regained the same serious tone she had earlier, “You know my family isn’t going to want you here.”

“But do you?” He asked, earning a confused look in return. “Lydia, do you want me to leave?”

“I don’t know, Beej. If I say, yes will you go?” The teen asked playfully.

“Nope! But get this- I won’t leave, because I can’t.”

“Wait what?” Lydia’s smug expression fell.

“I am trapped here just like dear old Adam and Barbara. You may wonder ‘how?’ and to that I say- I don't know! But I have an idea on how I might be able to leave, and that involves you, scarecrow. I need you to say my name three times and maybe, just maybe, I can get out of here.”

“What if it doesn’t work?”

“Well then, we just have to test it to find out.”

“Beetlejuice,” the demon clenched his fists in anticipation. “Beetlejuice,” he closed his eyes, preparing himself. “Beetlejuice,” Lydia finished off, watching intently to see what would happen.

The bio-exorcist stayed quiet for a little bit before opening one eye to examine if anything had happened. Groaning, he opened his other eye. “I don’t feel any different.” He tried using his demonic powers but nothing happened, well there were a bit of sparks (which caused Lydia to giggle a little at his failure). He tried teleporting but that was to no avail. “I don’t have my demon powers. I’m… not a demon.” Lydia was understandably shocked. For as long as she knew Beetlejuice he was a demon, she couldn’t even picture him as anything else. “I’m a ghost, Lydia! A fucking ghost!” He shouted angrily, slamming his fist down on her bed post. She shushed him, causing him to take a few deep breaths, “Okay, sorry, sorry. Gotta keep quiet so the fam doesn’t find me, I know.”

Lydia scrunched her nose in disgust at the word ‘fam’ but knew that wasn’t nearly as important as what Beetlejuice just revealed about himself. “How can you no longer be a demon? Is that even possible? And you said you’re trapped here? In that case, it doesn’t matter if you’re quiet or not. It’s not like you can hide forever. Plus, maybe Adam and Barbara can help get you back to normal. Is there a way to get you back to normal? What if-”

The ex-demon placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder, causing her to look up at him. “I’ll be honest with you, I zoned out until you said Adam.”

The girl pushed his hand off her shoulder, “This is serious Beej. What if you’re trapped here forever like the Maitlands?”

“Then I’m trapped here forever with the Maitlands” he smirked.

Lydia scoffed, rolling her eyes. “There’s gotta be some reason you’re like this, and there has to be some way to get you back to the way you were.” Beetlejuice nodded in agreement. “First step to figuring this all out is to let everyone know what’s happening.”

She motioned for him to follow her. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Nope but it’s all we got.” She shrugged and he copied the action.

Beetlejuice put his hand on the door before she could open it. “Okay but what if we prank them?”

“You know I’m always down to spook my family, but they’re not gonna be happy that you’re here to begin with. So we should take things easy, don’t overwhelm them, y’know?” He groaned and muttered complaints under his breath as he moved his hand from the door.

Lydia led Beetlejuice downstairs. No one was in the living room, so she loudly screamed for a family meeting.

Charles bolted into the room, Delia excitedly following him. The Maitlands sank down from the ceiling, clearly stressed by the teen’s yelling.

“I can’t believe you called a family meeting, Lydia!” Delia said cheerfully, not noticing the ex-demon standing behind Lydia.

“Get away from her” Charles commanded, glaring angrily at Beetlejuice. Sure, they didn’t leave off on a bad foot, but he was not going to let history repeat itself. Delia flinched at his shouting before seeing who he was talking to.

“Oh c’mon, Chuck. Aren’t you happy to see your son-in-law?” Beej teased, earning death glares from all of the adults in the room. “Too soon?” He asked, feigning innocence. Lydia laughed at the inappropriate joke. “See this guy gets it” Beetlejuice smiled, nudging the teen.

Delia placed a hand on Charles’ arm, a silent plea for him to remain calm. Adam placed his arm out in front of Barbara. She looked to him and he shook his head. With a sigh, she backed down, holding onto her husband’s hand for her emotional stability.

“Beetlejuice is trapped here as a ghost like Barbara and Adam.” Lydia states, breaking the tension in the room. Confusion was plastered on the adults’ features.

“How?” Adam asked slowly, hesitantly.

“Good question, really good question. However, we don’t have a really good answer.” Beetlejuice verbally danced around the answer.

“What does that mean?” Charles furrowed his eyebrows.

“He doesn’t know how this all happened.” The teen clarified with a shrug. “I thought that maybe my resident ghost parents could help us figure out what happened to him.”

Barbara narrowed her eyes at the ex-demon, not buying his act. Adam, however, smiled softly and said, “Of course we’ll help, Lydia.”

“If you’re staying here, we’re gonna need to lay down some ground rules.” Charles stated, eyes locked on Beetlejuice.

He met his eyes with an almost wicked smile, “Of course, Chuck.”

Lydia groaned dramatically, “it’s not like he can do much. He’s a ghost now, not a demon.”

“Ghosts need boundaries too” Barbara retorted.

“I think the most obvious rule is that you cannot marry Lydia again.” Delia said, earning nods from the adults in the room.

Beetlejuice groaned, “how many times do I have to say that it was a green card thing!?! Even I’m not creepy enough to actually try to marry Lydia. She’s like 3!”

“I’m almost 16, Beej.” She rolled her eyes.

“Exactly you’re 3. Now quiet down tot, the grown ups are talking.” He teased. She stuck her tongue out at him and he stuck his out at her.

“You’re not one to talk about age Beetlejuice. You may be extremely old, but you’re less mature than Lydia.” Charles spoke snidely. Both the ex-demon and his daughter seemed offended by the statement.

“Rule number two: no pranks.” Adam spoke up, trying to change the subject.

“What? That’s not fair!” Beej protested at the same time Lydia asked “Have you met us?”

“The last time you two pulled pranks, you scared people to the point that the passed out!” Barbara explained.

“Just because a couple of cowards couldn’t take a scare, doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t be able to prank. Plus, That Beautiful Sound was a whole bop and our dance sequence was phenomenal.” Beetlejuice said defensively. Everyone except for Lydia gave him a confused look.

“Please don’t take away our pranks! We’ll tone them down, I promise.” Lydia bartered, giving both sets of parents puppy dog eyes.

Adam cracked first, then Delia, then Barbara. Charles didn’t crack until, with a frown, she muttered a quiet “please dad.”

“Okay fine. Rule number two is no big pranks. Just try not to do anything that will put yourself or others into harm’s way.” Charles amended.

“Rule three: don’t physically harass us, Beetlejuice.” Barbara said, crossing her arms sternly.

“Define physically harass…” BJ said furrowing his brows.

“Don’t grope or touch either of us inappropriately, don’t kiss us, and don’t make inappropriate jokes at our expense. I’m not just gonna take it this time.” Barbara said. Maitlands 2.0!

“Fair enough, Babs. But don’t pretend you didn’t like it.” He joked, earning the most terrifying look from Barbara. “Okay okay sorry, I was just kidding.”

Adam lightly rubbed his thumb in circles on Barbara’s hand, causing her to relax and saving Beetlejuice from her wrath.

“Rule four: no lashing out. In this house we try to maintain a calming aura, all matters can be solved through (calm) communication.” Delia smiled. Beetlejuice resisted to roll his eyes.

“I’d say the final rule is to not go into anyone’s bedroom unless you’re invited in. Snooping or just disturbing the peace is highly frowned upon, so just watch yourself. If any more rules are to be added in the future, you are expected to follow them as well.” Charles concluded.

“As you wish, Chuckles.” Beej said with a posh accent, bowing dramatically. Lydia giggled at his antics, but as usual, she was the only one to appreciate his jokes.

“We will leave you to figure out how all of this happened.” Delia stated with a soft smile, she lead Charles out of the room, and motioning for Lydia to follow. Hesitantly, she did. She mouthed to BJ that she’d be back in a bit.

“I don’t believe you.” Barbara said as soon as she heard the door down the hall close.

“What? What’s there to not believe? Wouldn’t you think I’d prefer to leave than stay somewhere where I’m clearly not wanted?”

“Well you weren’t exactly wanted the first time-“ Adam started, but was cut off by the ex-demon.

“I was selfish then. Goal oriented, if you will. I just wanted to be alive! But I’ve been down that track and seems like life just wasn’t meant for me. But here we are now, and I’m trapped with my killers.”

“Lydia is the one who stabbed you with bad art.” Adam stayed matter-of-factly.

“But you convinced me I was wanted. You kissed me.” He accused Adam. “And you flirted with me.” He pointed at Barbara. “You played to my senses to emotionally manipulate me! And you think I’m here by choice?”

Barbara frowned. He had left so confidently. There didn’t seem to be any hard feelings. But here they were. “Beetlejuice, I believe that you’re stuck here. I just meant that I didn’t believe you were telling the whole truth. But I’m sorry for what we did, we just wanted what was best for Lydia and that seemed like the only option.”

Beej took a breath, remembering Delia’s dumb rule. “What do you mean by you don’t believe I’m telling the whole truth?”

“You have to know how you got here.” Barbara said.

“Okay yeah fair enough. I’m pretty sure I know how and why I’m here but not how I can leave.”

“Wh- it was just that easy?” Adam asked. “All Barbara had to do was call you out?”

“The netherworld is full of paperwork

and again, an abrupt ending! because past me sucked <3

#long post #draft #a work out of progress #straight up didn't edit this #breaking the fourth wall #beetlejuice fanfiction #not beetlelands this time lads #but it likely would’ve been #bc back in the day bestie had major beetlelands brain rot!!#tbh i don’t really ship it now #but you didn’t hear that from me #beetlejuice #barbara maitland #adam maitland #lydia deetz #charles deetz #delia deetz

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ldrmas · 3 years

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Part 1

A Pirates Life for Me: A Beetlejuice Pirates of the Caribbean Part 1 Part 2 here - https://ldrmas.tumblr.com/post/647683249019207680/part-2 Character Sheet for those who have questions - https://ldrmas.tumblr.com/post/647688946637324288/pirates-characters - Not exactly where I wanted to start but this is already long so yeah, I hope you all enjoy! Please leave a comment or a reblogg telling me what you think. Again if there is dialogue that is a repeat of the movie I am not taking claim to it, I’m just admitting I’m not smart enough to come up with something better. Obliviously this whole plot and lines do not belong to me, they belong to the mouse, I’m just commandeering them for the story, savvy? But still enjoy, me hearties! -

“May I have a moment?” Berthold asked as he came up beside her. Lydia had hidden in an alcove out of the blistering Caribbean sun as soon as the ceremony was over, but it hadn’t been enough. The new appointed Commodore had found her and actually wanted her to walk with him. She put all of her pain aside as she knew he couldn’t insult him by denying him, not with her father watching.

“You may.” She agreed with a slight smile as she followed him back out into the damning sunshine. They only stopped as they were along one of the several fort walls, away from others.

Lydia supported herself against the cold stone, but Bert didn’t take any notice of her pain just that she was a vision of true beauty. She didn’t reply to him as he said as such, but she made to send him another thankful smile, only for it to instantly drop as he turned away.

“I do regret with how forward I am but this…Well this promotion has thrown into sharp relief things that I have yet to achieve, such as a marriage to a fine woman.” The Commodore turned back to her, so lost in what he was trying to say that he again was ignoring her plight.

The corset was crushing her from all sides and her pale face was becoming even whiter as air was rejected from her lungs.

“You have become that fine woman, Lydia.”

“I…I can’t breathe.”

“Yes, quiet so.” Bert chuckled as he turned away from her again, gazing out into the ocean and over the whole town that was under his protection. “I too am a bit nervous, I must admit.”

No one noticed, especially not Commodore Strong, as Lydia’s eyes suddenly closed, before as if she were no more than a heavy sack of potatoes, she fell over the wall of the fort, down the ledge to the clear water below.

“And then they made me their chief.” Beetlejuice finished his tale with a shrug as if it was no big deal. He was leaning against the Dauntless’s helm with his wrists flicking at every other word or so to emphasize the tale he was telling. The two militia men had been hanging on his every word as if he were a god and it was funny to him to watch them as he told his elaborate story. They were quiet expressive lads.

They all jumped, and their necks snapped to the side as they heard a splash.

“Lydia?” Berthold asked as he turned about yet he was alone. The lady had just been standing behind him and now there was no one. He looked over the wall, his face going ashen as he saw the ripples and realization hit him like a shot.

“Lydia!” He yelled out before jerking off his coat. He only managed to get it halfway off before his friend was halting him and somewhat pulling him back from the edge.

“The rocks, sir! It’s a miracle that she missed them.�� Prudentius said as he glanced at the water before looking back to his friend. Bert still wanted to jump but he knew his second in command was right. He then readjusted his coat and burst through the crowd. He had to make it the docks and hope that he could save her in time.

“Oi, will either of you be wanting to, oh I don’t know, possibly save the lass.” Beetle growled as the men didn’t immediately jump overboard to save the woman who had fallen into the ocean. If she weren’t already dead from the fall alone, she would rightly die if they didn’t jump in after her in the next few moments.

“But I can’t swim!” Mahon cried as he looked back to the green haired man then to where the woman had landed. Beej fixed his gaze on the other soldier, Mein, who instantly shook his head in confirmation that he couldn’t either.

“Jaysus…” He growled as he began taking off his gray coat and gear, shoving into the men’s arms so he could climb up onto the gunwale. “Pride of the kings navy you lot are, and if you lose those, I’m gonna haunt you!”

With the last threat, he was upon the railing then diving into the Caribbean chilling sea. He pushed his body through the water, having learned to swim to survive, and he when he made it to the rocky area, he sucked in a deep breath then was diving under the clear water. He could see her drifting like a mermaid, stuck to the sandy bottom, yet she wasn’t floating like a dead body should.

Beej locked his arms around her, kicking back to the surface.

He broke the water with her against his shoulder but unexpectedly they both sank right back down. A gulp of seawater invaded his lungs as they were back under the water, but he was clear headed enough to realize it was the dress. He pulled at the chest piece of the fabric, thankful that it split easily enough, and he was able to push it off her shoulders. The dress sank like a damn anchor, but he didn’t pay it anymore mind as he wrapped her back into his arms and headed back up to the surface.

“I got her. I got her.” The brown-haired soldier called out as he pulled the lass up from his broad shoulder while the golden haired one helped him back up to the dock.

“She’s not breathing!” Mahon shouted before Beej rightly pushed him away, pulling a knife from his boot and slicing at the strings criss crossed over her chest. He then pulled the blush pink corset apart, opening it like a clam. The lass turned over, coughing and sputtered up the ocean water stuck in her throat, her hazel eyes opening only to squeeze shut again as she tried to bring air back into her sea drenched lungs.

Beej then pulled the corset completely off her, throwing it to the Mein, who caught it but wished to immediately drop it to the dock. Mahon was gazing at him as if he was a genius. “I…I wouldn’t have thought of that.” He admitted as he sat back on his hunches since the lady was safe and there wasn’t anything further he could do, as if he was any help before.

The green haired pirate deeply rolled his eyes. “You haven’t been to Singapore, have ya?” He asked with a sarcastic bite, yet all words further died on his tongue as a glint of gold twinkled from between the Lass’s unbound chest.

He usually would have been fascinated just from the sight of the drenched lady, who was in nothing but a white chemise. It hid nothing from his view, yet he ignored it all, as his focus was completely on the gold chain and coin at its end. He plucked the necklace up between his dirty fingers as his eyes widened at the coin on the end, the skull smiling at him in taunt.

“Where did you get that?” Lydia gazed up at him. She was shivering and still sucking in deep breaths of air as she completely took in the man who had rescued her. This strange and unusual man had saved her life. She barely remembered what had happened, but she wasn’t a fool. It didn’t take much for her to realize she must have fainted and had somehow survived after having fallen off the forts wall.

She didn’t get a chance to answer him, fore nothing further could be said because suddenly the dock was overflowed with soldiers. Beetlejuice froze as the chilling press of a blade was right at his neck just below his jaw. His hands that were still dripping from the ocean slowly rose upward as he reluctantly let the coin slip from his fingers. The two men who had been talking to the pirate were back to their full height flanking the still crouching man between them.

“On your feet.” Berthold ordered as he stood in front of the man who was hunched over Lydia. The green haired man rose promptly upon his boot covered feet and even made to back away just enough for the sword to barely touch his skin.

Charles pushed through the men before helping his daughter up off the dark wooden deck and wrapped her up in his powder blue coat. He jerked her closer as he realized she was only in her under layer of dress before his eyes flew wide as he recognized the pink corset in the soldier’s hand. Mein realized instantly what the governor was looking at. He immediately dropped the article of clothing before pointing an accusing finger to the man at his left.

“Shot him this instant!” Charles barked as he made to hug his daughter who unexpectedly pushed him away, calling out to him in protest. An understandable question fell from him before she then shot her hazel steeled glare to the other man across from them.

“Commodore, you truly mean to kill the man that saved me?” Lydia out right asked as if she dared him to challenge her. Bert made to look slightly ashamed, though it was only for a moment, his glare hardened his visage while he put away his sword. The militia were hesitant but eventually followed his lead and too lowered their guns, the clicks of the safety’s echoing around them all.

Beej took a moment to bow his head in thankfulness to the Lass, placing his hand over his blackened heart. He made sure not to move though fore he could tell it wasn’t going to be that easy, especially when the Commodore stuck out his hand.

“I believe thanks are certainly in order.” He ceded though there was a challenge in his expression, a brown eyebrow raised high. Beetle settled him with a glare before he reluctantly shoved his ashen and dirty hand into the sun kissed one. Once their palms met, Bert jerked off his wrist band that showed off what they both knew to be there. The impression of a capital ‘P’ still pink and standing out upon his whitish hued skin after all these years.

“Ah, had a brush with the East Indian Trading Company, did we, pirate?” The Commodore spat out the word as if it was venom. Beej didn’t even flinch at the accusation, only gently let his hand fall back to his side when the man let his hand go as if it had burned him. “And if I’m not mistaken…you’re that one fellow that starts with a K…”

“It doesn’t matter, hang him!” Charles growled his hold on his daughter still crushing. Lydia pushed off his hands but pulled the coat tighter around herself to silence his unspoken fussing. Her eyes kept darting over to the now recognized pirate with hidden intrigue, though she made sure to drop her gaze whenever she felt her father looking down upon her.

“If I may, it’s Beetlejuice Kreaton, sir.” Bert’s second in command spoke up with a teasing grin.

“Ah yes, thank you, Prudentius. Fetch us some irons for Beetlejuice Kreaton, the ghost pirate.” Bert now recalled the name from the wanted posters they had around the fort.

“Captain Kreaton, if you please.” Beej replied while he flicked a hand through his soaked two-tone locks to get them out of his face. His ringed hand glinted in the Caribbean sun, along with his doubloon-colored eyes.

“I don’t happen to see your ship about, do you, Captain?” Bert mocked as his eyes swept over the harbor, both in joking and secretly in fact double checking that a pirate ship hadn’t pulled into the harbor while he was away from the fort.

“I’m in the market, but sadly got held up, ya know so I could be saving your pretty strumpet here.” The pirate teased back flawlessly as he cocked a grin to the lass he had spoken about, who stared unbelieving at him before her face fell into a glower.

“Sir, he said he came here to commodore one.” Mein took that moment to speak up, and Beej held himself back from rolling his eyes, of course the guardsman would blab of his plan.

“Told ’ya…” Mahon muttered before he realized something. “Oh sir, these are his.” The red coated man picked up the pirate’s effects into his arms and proudly held them out to the man in charge, as if he had single handedly taken them from the pirate. The same pirate who was now deadly glaring at him before it shot to the Commodore, who was looking over his belongings with a look of disdain.

“No additional shot, nor extra powder.” Bert analyzed as he picked up the pistol, silently admiring its craftsmanship before returning it to the pile. He picked up the compass and opened it only to then scoff. “A compass that doesn’t point north.” After he put that back, he took the hilt of the sword to barely remove it from its sheath, another teasing grin curving upon his lips.

“And here I believed this to be made of wood.” There was a resounding click as the sword was secure once again and the two men stared at each other, locked in a deadly impasse. “You are no doubt the worst pirate I have ever heard of.”

Beej chuckled, his lips wide enough to let his alabaster canines to glint through. “Yet you have heard of me.”

The tone was nothing but mocking and Bert’s face completely fell in silence rage, his teeth clenching as he reached out, securing a hold upon the man’s arm and began dragging him through the swarm of men. The red coated navy men parted for their boss, not daring at all to get in the way of the Commodore. It was just when he passed the pirate to his second in command, did he freeze for a voice called out to him.

“Commodore, I really must protest!” Lydia barked as she had followed Bert at his heels, effortlessly moving around him as he stopped at her voice. She had thrown off the coat from her shoulders, her father picked it up as he moved after her. She stood between Berthold and the pirate, fixing him with her hazel eyes that were shimmering with an unknowable plea.

How could they hang the man that had rescued her?

“It matters not what he is, this man saved my life.” She insisted as her gaze jumped back and forth from her father to the Commodore, hoping that either of them would agree with her. It never happened, Bert stepped forward as if to pull her away but hesitated as she rightly jerked backwards.

He sighed as his coffee-colored eyes pleaded with her to understand. “One good deed does not redeem a lifetime of evil, Lydia.”

“It’s enough to condemn him, apparently.” Beej spoke up so not to hiss as Prudentius soundly secured the irons around his wrists. He also did well to hide his surprise as the same man then stepped away, to retreat at a fair amount of distance nearly back at Bert’s side.

“Indeed.” Bert growled as his eyes settled once again on the pirate.

“Finally.” Beej whispered with a devil like grin. In the next blink he had thrown his locked-up hands around the Lady’s neck, instantly jerking her back until she was flushed against his form. The soldiers all tensed, stepping forwards to interfere with his plan but certainly halted as Lydia yelped at the press of the chilling metal sinking into the skin of her neck. Charles dropped his coat, wanting to jump to his daughter, but Bert put an arm to his shoulder, keeping him back.

“NO! Don’t shoot! Do not shoot them!” The Governor pleaded out the order, his voice laden in sadness as all he could do was watch the pirate wrap his arms about his only child. The Captain smirked against her skin as he kept a secure hold upon her, completely ignoring her crying father to focus completely on the only man who could get him out of here.

“I knew you’d see it my way, now,” Beej said with a defiant glare. “Commodore Strong, my effects, please. And I mean all of them, mate.”

Bert didn’t move as his eyes swept over the captor and victim, his mind running with thoughts as if he could find some way to get the Lady out of the grimy hold of the swashbuckler. Beej growled as he tightened the chains around the Lass’s neck, easing up only when a pained gasp sang from her throat. The throat that was going to be bruised later, there was no doubt.

“Commodore.” Beej barked and this time the man moved, turning about to collect the things from Mahon. When he turned his back to them, Beej pressed his lips to the Lass’s ear, easing the pressure on her neck once again.

“Lydia…it was Lydia, wasn’t it?” He asked, a smile tugging his lips up.

“That’s Miss Deetz to you!” She growled in reply, her eyes closed calmly, though her stance read something completely different. He could feel her trembling against him, and he knew it was half from the icy ocean and half because she was at his mercy.

“Miss Deetz,…” He echoed with a playful tone before shooting Bert a glare over her head.

“…if you’d be so kind. Come on now, we’re losing daylight…” The Commodore placed the effects into her arms and only when he had stepped back did Beej move his hand down taking his pistol from her. It was nothing to instantly cock it and press it to her temple before twirling her about in his hold. He didn’t have to keep the chains at her neck anymore since a gun had taken the threat, so he placed his hand just upon her shoulder while the tips of his fingers traced along the fine still soaked squid ink hair along the base of her pale swan like neck.

“And now if you’d be awfully kind.” He mused with a grin full of his white glinting teeth. Her hazel steeled glare would have killed lesser men, but Beej took the death of the look in stride as she began to place his items back on his persons.

He couldn’t help chuckling as she shuffled with the items in her hands looking about him as if to decide where she was supposed to put each piece. She then took the cord of leather attached to the compass, probably wanting to loop it around his belt but went to drop it into his breeches pocket instead. He would have to make sure to secure it later when he was getting away from this. It wouldn’t do to lose his greatest treasure just because the Lass didn’t wish to have her hands at his waist. The last object was his belt for his cutlass.

She sneered at him as she had to undo the large clasps then throw her arms around him so she could reattach it to his body. The poor lass was shorter than him so she had to lean up on her tip toes to reach and he couldn’t help wrapping his arms about her to bend down so that she could do her task. He nuzzled his head into her neck, sending the Commodore a broad grin that was nothing but smugly victorious as she looped the dark leather over his shoulder then pulled the belt back to his front.

As she pushed him back so she could redo the buckle, he grunted. “Easy on the goods there, Lass.”

“You’re despicable.” Her voice rumbled as her eyes at last looked up at him down her nose with nothing but resentment and scorn. She was fierce and unafraid with a gun pressed to her head and it was admirable. He shrugged at her words, his face dropping into a neutral visage.

“Sticks and Stones…” He replied, making sure their eyes connected as he continued. “You saved my life, and I saved yours, we be squared now, luv. Gentleman…” He shouted as he suddenly turned her back around and began to back them up. She could do nothing but follow as the black chains were once again pressed into her neck. The gun was still pressed pointed at her head, yet it was no longer pressing against her skin as he whispered into her golden pierced ear.

“My dear…” He shot his gaze up to the men who were slowly following them before he grinned. “Remember this as the day you almost caught Captain Beej Kreaton.” At the mention of his name, he released the Lass, pushing her into the crowd of militia then instantly turned on his hampers running to a rigging. His boot hit the latch and he was propelled up into the air before anyone could touch him. The men scattered as a cannon was dropped upon them, some of them even falling through the hole it created.

Beej had grabbed hold of another rigging though sadly the wooden structure continued to spin him around so he yelped as he could only hold on as he went on and on in circles.

“Now will you shoot him!” Charles barked as he had held onto his daughter who had been pushed more into the Commodore’s hands than his own. He would have pulled her to him, but Bert was holding onto her instead. The said commander yelled out the order to open fire.

Bullets zinged passed Beej and he yelled out as he couldn’t do anything to dodge them. He finally managed to swing upon the next rigging structure, and he put the ungodly chains to his use. He threw the black manacles over the rope using them to zipline down the brown line, until he deemed he was close enough before deciding to let go, soundly landing on the deck, and without missing a single step continued to run along the bridge into town. The militia shot at him but missed though there were screams of village people who fell behind the bridge wall to avoid the incoming fire.

“Prudentius…” Bert growled as he came up the stairs then around the structures just to catch the glimpse of the pirate disappearing into the maze of streets that led into the vastness of the town. “Kreaton just happens to have an appointment with the gallows at dawn, we can’t allow him to miss it.”

“With me, men.” Prudentius ordered as he took a group of the red wool coated men to follow where the pirate had disappeared too.

“Search everywhere!”

“Look lively, men!”

Men draped in the color red flooded the streets of Port Royal searching every nook and cranny for the pirate. The said pirate had been hiding behind a statue that was attached to the blacksmiths shop. He had taken out his sword and slid it into the fist of the stone man so that the soldiers wouldn’t take a second glance it’s way. He waited until he heard the navy men had passed by before removing himself from behind the statue only to freeze as another group of militaries were going off to his left. He quickly ducked into the blacksmith shop to get out of sight. The shop appeared empty which was good, he had to get out of the chains. There had to be something here that he could use to get them off. He took a moment to not only catch his breath but also reattach his compass to his side. A clank suddenly echoed behind him and he turned about looking at what made the noise.

In the back of the shop there was the shop owner, dead asleep while propped up in a chair.

Beetlejuice made his way over to him curious if his life was about to be jeopardized because of a single man. He came up to the man nudging him with a grimy finger. The man grunted yet otherwise remained absolutely still and deeply fast asleep. The man didn’t seem to be moving from touch but what about sound.

“YO!” Beetle suddenly shouted nearly right into the blacksmith’s ear. Nothing. The man didn’t even flinch. The pirate nodded in happiness as he then shuffled back over to the tools and began to pick them up. He had to get these manacles off.

He took a hammer and began banging on the black iron but it had no effect. He was running out of options and time. He couldn’t hide in here forever. Beetle suddenly noticed the gears above the donkey. He tilted his head as he figured he could try those. Now it was just about getting the donkey to move, his gaze went to the poker in the fire and a smirk curled his lips up.

The donkey bayed loudly in pain before beginning to move about in the circles. The only way he could move. Beej felt slightly guilty but he ignored it as he threw the chains upon the boards and with a louder clank of the gears the irons were broken in half. It wasn’t ideal but he could at least move his arms freely now.

The victory was short lived though for the blacksmith door opened and the apprentice was coming inside. Beej quickly hid as the blonde-haired lad closed the door behind him but gasped at the sight of the donkey going in circles.

“Easy Fox, easy!” He called out to the poor animal wrapping his arms around him to calm the donkey, rubbing his fur gently. Once he was sure the animal was alright, he sighed as he began taking off his coat then glancing where he was sure Colin was still sleeping. His master was indeed still there, and he shook his head.

“Just as I left ya, for goodness sake.” He didn’t know why he was so irritated, this wasn’t anything new.

Once Colin curled up in a place, he would be out for hours maybe even afternoons on end, yet for some reason today it was just stinging him with an unexplainable anger. It might have been because of Governor Deetz not giving him the compliments for his work, it was all for Colin who had done nothing to get the sword done. Then he heard of the disturbance at the Commodore’s party where some pirate had attacked Lydia. He swore if he saw said pirate, he would tear him limb for limb for dare touching her.

“Wait a minute…” He suddenly said as he looked to his anvil, his brows pinching as his hammer was resting along the black metal. “I didn’t leave you there.”

A laugh echoed in his ear and a cold metal was suddenly resting along his throat. He froze as he could feel a body pressing along his back. “Hiya, lad.”

Dominic managed to look over his shoulder without getting cut and he instantly growled as the sight of man who was holding his life in his hands. “You! You’re the one who attacked Lydia, the pirate.”

“Oh, maybe you didn’t hear, but I saved her life as well.” Beej chuckled as he rolled his eyes. “Why do you care?”

Dominic pushed away from the pirate and Beej reluctantly let him step away as he quickly unsheathed his sword keeping the lad back while he placed his dagger back in his sash. The younger man turned to face him, his moss green eyes glaring at him as he kept out of reach of the sword. He jerked back grabbing one of the swords in one of the holders that was scattered along the shop before leveling it with the pirates.

“She’s my friend.” He sneered as he fell into a basic stance, one that he had to teach himself since he never had true training. “And you threatened her.”

Beej smirked as he mockingly ran his own sword up and down the one in the lad’s hand. “Just a tad.”

Dom jolted towards the taller man, but the pirate was quick to jump back, before they began to circle each other, sizing each other up and waiting for the opportune moment to strike. The apprentice moved again, swinging his sword to the right though Beej effortlessly blocked it.

After being given to Colin when Captain Strong had brought him back to Port Royal, Dom had been designing swords for years. He had a natural talent for it so while he spent years making the weapons, he also made sure to practice with them. It was again the basic of basic skills, but it was better than nothing. He was glad he had for he was keeping up with his opponent. He flicked his wrist, his sword colliding into the pirate’s with a resounding clang.

“Well now,” Beej mused with a wicked smirk as he eyed the lad across from him. “You seem to know what you’re doing, form is meh. Now, how be your footwork?”

He took a step to the right, Dom matching his strides as their blades connected in the air. “Good, good.” Dom sent him a challenging smile only to quickly draw back then slash at the man while stepping back into the pirate’s space. Beej gave a cocky grin as he blocked the sword flawlessly. “Gutsy, arn’cha?”

The swords clashed over and over again through the air, the metallic clangs echoing repeatedly over the shop. Beej’s took a second to let his eyes sweep over the building, nearly paling at countless racks of swords on the walls and on the two circle structures off to the side of the shop. “Jaysus, who the hell makes all these?”

“I do!” Dom barked while deflecting the jabs of the pirate. “And I practice with them all, several hours a day.”

“Find yourself a girl already, lad.” Beej retorted with a bright wide smile. He then hummed as he made their blades connect above their heads, near getting into the lad’s space. “Or, perhaps you do all that practicing, ‘cause ya already have one and are completely unawares on how to woo said Lass. Do you need some lessons from someone more experienced, mate?”

“I practice so that when I meet pirates, I can run them through!” Dominic roared as he backed away then lunged back at Beej, swinging his blade in a wilder style that was nothing to Beej, for he blocked it all as he laughed only to gasp as the lad had backed him up onto a cart.

The lad followed him onto the cart which instantly tipped under the weight of the two of them. The men were swaying as the cart went up and down for just a moment then instantly landed on Beej’s end. He was obliviously bulkier than the apprentice, who nearly fell to the pirate’s side with the jerk of the cart.

Beej laughed as it was that the lad didn’t have great balance, which was Beej’s advantage from living his life on ships. Dom kept to the higher end of the cart diving back into the fight. The clank of their swords was now a becoming sound in their ears. It had been too long since Beetle had a good sword fight and even though his opponent could use some more work, he definitely wasn’t giving up.

It was admirable.

Beej then jumped off the cart causing the weight to shift sending Dom tumbling across the dirt caked floor. He recovered quickly enough to see the pirate trying to escape and that was not going to happen. He yelled out as he threw the sword, it flew through the air ending stuck into the door just above the latch.

“No, you brat!” Beej growled as he couldn’t open the door. He turned back and lunged for the lad, who already had another sword in his hand. They danced around the space before Beej grabbed the bag that was hanging close to the fire, the shops dust hitting Dom right in the face. In the time it took the blond haired man to recover, grabbing one of the tools for defense, the pirate had a gun pointed to his temple.

“You cheated!” Dom frowned as he eyed the gun.

Beej raised an eyebrow before shrugging. “Pirate.”

Nothing further could be said for it was then that the front door to the blacksmith's shop began to rattle. The shouts of soldiers calling out for the door to be opened singling that it was time for Beej to go. It was only then that he also realized the younger man was still in his way. The lad realized it as well instantly jumping between the pirate and the second door, Beej’s only way out.

“Move it!” Beej barked as he stepped closer, but Dom held his ground.

“Not a chance!” Dom growled as he dropped the tool but still steeled his body between the pirate and the exit.

“For Blimey sake, kid, just move!” Beej was near begging. The soldiers would storm this place any minute and as much as he didn’t want to kill, he couldn’t be caught either.

“NO!” Dom barked now, his green glare nothing but defiant. “I will not step aside allowing you to escape.”

Beej growled as he clicked the safety. “This bullet doesn’t have your name on it, ki-” Dom’s eyes widened as a glass shattered around the back of Beej’s head. The pirate’s eyes closed, and he slumped forward, landing soundly upon the dirt made floor. Colin smirked at his apprentice as he had been standing behind the pirate and had crashed his rum bottle upon the pirate’s head, knocking him out. It was just then that the navy stormed into the shop.

“Well done, Mr. Hampshire.” Berthold complimented as he came alongside the blacksmith, glancing at the unconscious pirate. “You aid in the capture of a dangerous man.”

“Just doing what anyone should do, sir.” Colin grunted as he let the broken bottle fall to his side so not to cut the Commodore.

“Right, well then, I’m sure you all will remember this as the time that Captain Kreaton almost escaped, now take him away.”

#beetlejuice #beetlejuice pirate au #beetlejuice pirate fanfiction #beetlejuice x lydia #beetlebabes #musicalbabes #potc cotbp #potc #pirates of the caribbean #pirates of the caribbean fusion #beetlejuice pirates of the caribbean #lydia deetz #charles deetz #beetlejuice cartoon #cartoon verse #beetlejuice cartoon verse #beetlejuice the animated series

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hermywolf · 3 years

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ranking my favorite characters about random shit part 2

ranking my favorite characters (clarke griffin, dean winchester, fox mulder, rose tyler, newt, kaz brekker, samwise gamgee, charles xavier, bill denbrough, lord asriel, steve rogers, scott mccall, anna milton and barry berkman) about random shit. this is entirely self-indulgent

PART 2 : how many allies do they have/how powerful are their allies. basically how screwed they’d be if they had to rely on their allies to survive

1- DEAN WINCHESTER

yeah believe it or not im putting him before charles or steve. listen, listen; dean just. does this thing. in which he’ll get pretty much anyone on his side after like two conversations. ESPECIALLY incredibly powerful supernatural creatures. i mean he’s got sam, aka the second best hunter on earth, and jack, literally GOD, on his side; then obviously the dean winchester simp squad, castiel, a seraph and commander of garrisons who can get heaven to fight for him; benny, a vampire; crowley, a powerful crossroad demon and the king of hell; amara, literally THE DARKNESS HERSELF, god’s SISTER; and then there’s just SO many others who will fight for him for diverse reasons, rowena, eileen, claire, jody, donna, kaia, mary, anna, gabriel, DEATH HIMSELF was his bitch before billie, then ketch charlie kevin, he’s just got so many allies and so many are some of the most powerful creatures in the universe. i mean, jack, amara and gabriel alone are three of the most powerful beings who have ever existed, as well as billie and the other archangels but all of them are dead, and chuck but he’s also dead and even he would be on dean’s side since dean is his favorite and if it’s an actual life-threatening situation chuck would want the show to keep going. so yeah dean winchester’s got the biggest defense squad imaginable and honestly? good for him, he deserves it

2- CHARLES XAVIER

do i even have to say it? outside of his ability to. you know. literally control minds, he’s also a leader who inspires loyalty and trust, and he’s got all the x-men fighting for him, including jean and logan - and even if we’re being honest some of the brotherhood, i mean especially in the first class timeline, erik and raven would absolutely be on his side. he’s got some of the most powerful mutants of all time ready to fight for his life

3- STEVE ROGERS

I mean he’s the leader of the avengers, man. have you seen the avengers assemble scene? they were fighting against thanos there but don’t try to tell me all of them wouldn’t fight for him. he’s got the falcon, black widow and the winter soldier on his side as well as the SCARLET WITCH, CAPTAIN MARVEL, THOR, do i need to keep going. he’s got a huge reputation and everyone knows and trusts him. and as we can also see in all his movies he inspires loyalty and devotion easily so even with people he doesn’t know he can get himself a loyal army in one well-delivered speech à la captain america

4- KAZ BREKKER

while most of the people on this list (steve, scott, charles, dean, bill, newt, anna) are born leaders who inspire trust and loyalty, kaz is just. really good at blackmail and insanely smart and cruel. and he’s got an insanely scary reputation too. he’s got the crows on his side no matter what, so an amazing spy, the best sharpshooter in ketterdam, a grisha who survived parem, an ex-drüskelle, and a demolition expert; as well as now the entirety of the dregs and inej’s crew, probably. plus, he most likely has leverage on the entirety of ketterdam and more. if he got in real trouble he could probably dig out the years and years of blackmail he got stacked away and get himself allyships with anyone he wants. plus his allies are ruthless, diverse and all strategically selected

5- SCOTT MCCALL

he’s got his entire pack ready to jump to help him anytime. and really when you think about it his pack is so big and diverse, there’s all kinds of creatures/skills ready to help him, plus he’s a true alpha, any werewolf would jump to his aid. I mean let’s look at his pack, stiles, allison, lydia, derek, malia, isaac, kira, hayden, mason, corey, and then of course stilinski, deaton, melissa, chris and peter, i mean even theo... he’s got a huge pack who is extremely loyal to him and they’re all kinds of creatures too, he’s fine

6- ROSE TYLER

everyone loves rose SO much. like obviously the doctor will give his life for her without hesitation but we also got jack, mickey, jackie, and even a bunch of people she met for like a couple episodes like donna or sarah jane immediately loved her. so i think she’s ultimately got some pretty solid allies especially with her father’s wealth and torchwood’s support in the alternate reality

7- CLARKE GRIFFIN

im putting her pretty down because on one hand he’s got very powerful/devoted allies on her side, like bellamy, lexa, roan, nyilah, finn, wells, etc (the key of getting your allies to be entirely devoted and loyal to you is to make at least half of them fall in love with you OR to top them so good they’ll literally put their lives down for you because of how good it was and clarke got that down to an art) BUT they’re also like. all dead. like almost all the people i just listed are dead so. yeah she’s kinda on her own in the end but if we look at early seasons clarke before literally all of them got murdered she had skaikru, azgeda and trikru pretty much in her pocket, so three of the biggest/most technically advanced armies on EARTH ready to fight for her.

8- LORD ASRIEL

now he doesn’t have actual allies per say but he can manage to get pretty much anyone on his side through charisma, threats and promises, so he ends up steadily getting massive support from witches, angels and many others in the books. he can pretty easily get himself a bunch of followers at his side ready to die for his cause.

9-SAMWISE GAMGEE

now listen he does have a pretty solid bunch of allies, aka the entire fellowship, who they, themselves, have a bunch of allies, who have a bunch of allies. i mean homeboi’s got ARAGORN and LEGOLAS and GANDALF on his side all ready to jump to save the tiny hobbits anytime so he’ll be fine.

10- BILL DENBROUGH

he’s immediately got the losers on his side, which is a win because they’re stubborn and annoying enough that they defeated an alien demonic clown. plus they’re quite literally assembled by a divinity to destroy a demon, so they’re the perfect team to kick ass and they’ll risk their lives for each other. plus he’s got a fanbase! people read his books and watch his movies. meaning he’s probably got a pretty big part of stan twt ready to help?? idk man i just think he’ll be fine when it comes to allies

11- NEWT

he’s got the entire glade ready to jump to his aid pretty much at any time, i mean let’s be honest if there’s one person all the gladers would agree on defending it would be.. ok it would be chuck bc he’s a CHILD but otherwise it’d be newt. plus he’s alby’s second in command and even gally likes him and respects him more than he likes and respects most people, which isnt much but hey kudos for the effort. anywho yeah the entire glade would defend him i think

12- ANNA MILTON

she would’ve once had the entirety of heaven at her commands ready to smite anyone who comes close to her but now that she fell and rebelled they all want her dead so. i mean i wish i could say cas would help her but after he betrayed her im not so sure? and the winchesters well idk either, maybe, maybe not, depends whether or not the entire trying-to-kill-sam ordeal happened. gabriel might help her? idk where to put her because i don’t KNOW if cas, dean, gabriel or the angels would help her but if any of them did then even one of these is a pretty solid backup so. idk man

13- FOX MULDER

im only on season 4 but as far as i can see he’s got only scully. which is pretty solid backup, she can kick ass, but still. i guess it’s one of the downsides of everyone thinking you’re batshit insane and having the entire government out to get you because they all LOATHE YOUR GUTS SO MUCH

14- BARRY BERKMAN

I mean dude. he pretty much kills all his friends. like he could ask for chris’s help but umm well he killed him, if he’s in a bad situation oh great he’s got a friend at the police except NO he murdered her. what’s that? fuches? no barry’s literally trying to murder him as of now. sally wouldn’t help him at all. cousineau just found out barry murdered his gf. at MOST he can hope that noho hank will help but i mean he’s not much help tbh i love the guy but he’s kinda useless<3

#hermy posts #ranking my favorite characters about random shit

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spitefulinamillionways · 4 years

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one shot idea: maybe how the family would react to beej having something like a panic attack or a nightmare? honestly i just love fics where they help him when he’s vulnerable (also if you ever want to post some art i would love to see it!)

awh, now i’m thinking about how juno would react to beej’s panic attacks..

•

Betelgeuse woke up in a cold sweat. He frantically looked around his small room, the old storage closet, before taking a deep breath and getting out of bed, throwing the blanket on the ground. He rushed into the kitchen and snatched a cup out of the cupboard, though many followed and landed on the floor, smashing everywhere.

“Shit!” He hissed, quickly trying to pick up all the shards of glass, cutting himself accidentally in the process. He wiped his hand on his shirt before being stopped by the light being turned on and a quiet, tired voice speaking up from the other side of the kitchen.

“Beej? What are you doing so late at night?” Lydia mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

“Oh, uh, I-” He was interrupted by Lydia shushing him, “I just..wanted to get a drink of water.” He whispered, looking back down at the glass, picking up the last few shards and throwing them away.

“Ghosts don’t need to drink water though...” She leaned against the door, half asleep. The door to the kitchen was opened again, causing Lydia to fall over and catch herself.

“What’s going on in here?” Barbara and Adam rushed through the door, both looking equally as concerned as the other.

“I just..wanted a drink..” Betelgeuse sat on the counter and filled a half-smashed cup with water, then drank it slowly. He was about to throw it into the sink, but even he realised how dumb of an idea that was. He put the cup down next to him and looked back up at the three, getting a proper look at them and sighed in relief. Thank god they were actually okay..

“Okay, but why did you smash so many cups?” Barbara asked, crossing her arms.

“I was in a hurry.” He mumbled, dangling his feet at the end of the counter and picking his fingernails.

Lydia sat next to him on the counter, looking at the cup. How the hell did he drink out of this?

“What hurry? It’s not like anybody was stopping you.” Lydia put the cup down and looked straight at Betelgeuse.

Betelgeuse stared right back at Lydia, which made her roll her eyes and turn to the Maitlands, shrugging. The two sighed and walked over to him.

“You can tell us if anything happened.” Adam reassured, holding Betelgeuse’s arm. After a couple moments of silence, he finally said something.

“Well, I- Okay..so, you all would never leave me, would you?” Betelgeuse began, “Like..you know what I mean. Abandon me or just..I don’t fucking know..” He seemed a lot quieter than usual and couldn’t even keep eye contact with any of them. Another silence fell upon the room.

“Beej..why would we ever do that? At this point, it’s like a kid asking their parents if they’d ever put them up for adoption or...I don’t know, a person asking the person they’re dating if they’d ever just break up with them for no reason!” Lydia explained, putting her hand on the demon’s back, who’s hair was now a deep purple. The Maitlands nodded and looked at eachother, feeling almost pity for the poor thing.

“Uh, yeah, you’re right, I’ll go back to bed now.” Betelgeuse quickly got up and began speed-walking out the door, before being grabbed by his shirt and pulled back.

“We aren’t done yet. We still don’t know what happened.” Barbara sat him down on the chair, to which he promptly stood back up. Barbara pushed him back down on the chair, with more force this time. Betelgeuse sat there fairly awkwardly, resting his head on his hand.

“What is this, a police interrogation?” He asked with a gruff and mumbly tone. Lydia stood up, took a flashlight and shone it in his face.

“No. It’s actually a kidnapping. Tell us all you know about what happened.” She shone the flashlight straight in his eyes, Betelgeuse not even flinching a bit.

“Yeah. We’re not letting you go!” Adam laughed and took another chair for himself.

“Ooh, kinky.” Betelgeuse looked at Adam, who just rolled his eyes, still smiling.

“Whatever you say, bucko.” Adam replied, to Betelgeuse’s surprise.

Barbara raised her eyebrows at Betelgeuse before taking the flashlight and shone it straight in his eyes. She noticed he didn’t seem to care so she gave up and gave it back to Lydia. She tried to think of reasons why Betelgeuse would be acting out all of a sudden. I mean, now he seemed like his usual self but before that. His ‘quiet and nervous-ish’ side, which he apparently had.

“Seriously, though, what happened?” She asked, leaning on the chair Adam was sitting on, “Why did you ask that?”

“It doesn’t matter. You guys should go back to bed.” Betelgeuse looked away again, raising his shoulders slightly, “I’ll go too...”

Why did this demon have to be so stubborn? Was he that protective of his pride that he couldn’t even talk about his feelings? Well, getting into the specifics, that is.

“Did you have a nightmare?” Adam finally asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I- Adam, I’m not scared of anything. Why would I have nightmares?” Betelgeuse looked disappointed, like how a mother would look at a child when their report card turns out to be shit. The ‘I-thought-you-were-better-than-this’ look.

“You sure do seem to be terrified of being abandoned.” Lydia muttered, playing with the flashlight.

“Well, maybe I am, maybe I’m not.” He shrugged, smirking. The smirk slowly went down once he realised how obvious it was that, yes, he was terrified of being abandoned, “Maybe I am..”

“Well, what was your nightmare about? Did we abandon you or something?” Barbara asked, standing closer to Betelgeuse now.

“Look, I- Do we have to talk about this now?!” He raised his voice slightly, thank god/satan Charles was a heavy sleeper. He sat in silence for a little bit, everyone else around him talking, or at least trying to. The longer he thought about what had happened, the worse it got. He went from lightly picking at his nails to fully biting them and from feeling fairly uncomfortable to tears welling up in his eyes.

“It’s just that I-” He mumbled, his voice breaking, which only pissed him off more. He usually only cried to other people when something big was happening. Not now. It was just a dream. It wasn’t real. Nothing like that would ever happen. Never.

“Beej?- Are you okay?” Lydia looked slightly concerned at the state of him. Betelgeuse looked up at her, his face red and hands shaking. He tried talking but nothing came out. The three quickly tried calming him as frantically as they could. But he couldn’t hear. He didn’t hear. All he heard was her. Her shouts and screams, hurting the people he loved and cared for all because of a dumb mistake he made. It was his fault. It was always his fault. Any fuckup she made or even anyone made, it was always him. He was always trailed back to it somehow, in some way. He was probably a fuckup in itself, it’s not like she ever cared of what he thought about or had to say. She deserved to die. She’s never coming back.

His thoughts were interrupted all of a sudden.

“Betelgeuse, we’d never leave you! None of us would, we promise. You’re part of the family now. We can’t just...leave you.” Lydia explained, tilting her head slightly.

Betelgeuse looked at her as if he didn’t believe a word she’d said, but accepted it anyway. It’s what he’d like to believe, too. He quickly stood up and hugged Lydia, something the two hadn’t done in a while. It lasted for over a minute, the Maitlands slowly joining in too.

“Thank you, guys...I just think-” Betelgeuse was interrupted, yet again, by Lydia.

“Nope! Don’t wanna hear it! Anything negative you have to say right now, just- No!” She held everyone tighter, smiling.

Betelgeuse laughed and let go of them, though slightly hesitating to do so. He sat back down and wiped his face, sighing shakily. The room was silent for a while, as if to process what had just went on.

“Really though. Thank you. It sounds cheesy because it is and I hate saying this kind of shit as you hate hearing it but I just..I don’t know. Forget it.” His talking slowly turned to mumbling and rambling. He wasn’t good at showing he cared for someone, “I..really don’t deserve you all.”

•

healdjksjf sorry if this isn’t good!! i’m writing this late at night because i completely forgot to check my inbox until now at like 2am like a dumbass,,,

if i made any grammar mistakes or the writing is just bad i’ll probably re read and rewrite some of it in the morning when i can, so if i did make any mistakes just wait a bit and they’ll be fixed soon!!!

i actually really had a lot of fun writing this! it was kinda difficult to keep beej in character throughout the whole thing, but in the end i think i did at least a little decently, right? i don’t know. you be the judge

thank you so much for always sending me asks when i make posts about it, i really appreciate it!

#beetlejuice #beetlejuice headcanons #beetlejuice incorrect quotes #beetlejuice headcanon #adam maitlands #barbara maitlands #beetlejuice incorrect quote #beetlelands #goldenrat #beetlebabes dni #beetlejuice fanfiction #beetlejuice fanfic

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meangirlsx · 4 years

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Delia Appreciation Post

I originally posted this as a reblog of an ask to the kind soul @emily-deetz who encouraged me to make it its own post so here it is.

I think we as a fandom really do love Delia but she deserves so much love and appreciation and here are my thoughts/reasons:

In one of the first interactions we see between Lydia and Delia, Delia calls Lydia weird and scary. This doesn’t seem to faze Lydia, especially considering we know at the time she’s trying to be weird and scary, so arguably, it could be taken as actually sort of matching Lydia’s sense of humor.

Or, at the very least, it’s showing us Delia cares about interacting with Lydia and it’s the starting place to show her growth by the end of the show.

Not much later, we hear Delia say to Charles, “I don’t see race.” The line is played for laughs because we as an audience know that’s not the right response to what Charles is saying (that Maxie Dean could be his white whale) and, in addition, we’ve all heard the reasoning for why not seeing race isn’t a thing and doesn’t solve anything.

I think, though, the fact that Delia says that tells us that, while she’s not always the brightest, she really is always positive and trying to be good, compassionate, and open.

In one of the next interactions we see between Lydia and Delia (possibly the next one, I can’t remember), Lydia takes a picture of Delia and sort of sarcastically says she wants something to remember her by when she’s gone.

Delia immediately responds in a very kind, gentle tone that she’s not going anywhere, and she doesn’t say it like she thinks Lydia is messing with her or challenging her or anything like that. She says it like she doesn’t want Lydia to worry.

Delia was hired to be Lydia’s life coach to help with the loss of her mom, and Delia and Charles have been together for a bit at this point, so I figure it may have already crossed Delia’s mind at least once to consider the concept of Lydia being her stepdaughter.

I can’t help but wonder if, in that moment, Delia thinks Lydia is saying she thinks Delia is going to leave just like her mom (and Delia might even think Lydia is starting to see her as a maternal figure but that could be a stretch) and Delia wants to make it clear to Lydia that she’s not going to lose her, too.

Delia tells Lydia she knows she’s paid to care about her but she wants them to be real friends, and she really seems to mean it and be excited about it.

Then she tries to dab, which is of course again played for laughs, but she probably sees kids around Lydia’s age doing that and she thinks it will make her relatable and cool and maybe give her more appeal as a possible friend for Lydia.

Delia tells Lydia she bought her a dress for Charles’s dinner party and maybe she just did it because she was trying to help Charles and knew Lydia wouldn’t have a dress that he thought was good for the dinner, so maybe this is a stretch, but I think it’s also possible she figured Lydia wouldn’t want to go shopping so she went and got the dress so Lydia wouldn’t have to go shopping.

I also think it’s worth noting that the dress fits, so Delia knows Lydia’s size.

We also see later when Lydia does wear the dress that she’s also wearing white tights and light-colored shoes to match, which we don’t see or hear Delia mention, so maybe Lydia already had them, but it’s also possible Delia got them to go with the dress and had to know those sizes, too.

Delia says that the dress says, “I’m warm, I’m friendly, and I think about death only a normal amount,” and the phrasing of that feels very in tune with Millennial and Get Z speech patterns and senses of humor, so even though it could be taken like it’s Delia sort of judging Lydia for being so focused on death, I think it could also be her actually sort of understanding Lydia at least a little bit.

Delia then offers to help Lydia clear out the attic and build a dark room for her photography in it.

She’s paying attention to Lydia’s interests and offering major support for them, and what she’s offering is definitely not a small task. She’s committing.

While “No Reason” is funny, not always containing the best advice, and a little too personal at times, it’s really well-intentioned and full of different ways to try to think positively.

Delia, speaking as the universe, sings, “You’re on the right track, girl / I got your back, girl / I’m helping you grow” which shows us that she wants Lydia to feel like the universe is on her side even when it feels like the world is against her and things hurt and don’t make sense.

Also possibly a stretch, but while Delia is pretending to be a voice for the universe, I think it could also be taken as her herself, saying that Lydia is on the right track and she’s got her back along the way, because she had to get the thought for the universe to say it in the first place, and we have seen Delia seem to be committing and wanting to stick around for Lydia.

During the song, Delia does a dance from Fortnite which, again, she probably saw some kids around Lydia’s age doing and thought it would make her seem cool and relatable and less like some strange adult or her life coach, just not realizing that that’s not how adults trying to act like teenagers come across.

Our girl has actually been through a lot.

It’s all played quickly and as humor, but in this scene and in the proposal scene, we learn that

1) Delia lived in an apartment in Queens that probably didn’t have air conditioning because she says it was really hot, and the doors locked from the outside.

2) She was kicked out of a band when she felt like she was just starting to belong.

3) She was rejected as a disciple of Vishnu when, again, she felt like she was just starting to belong.

Furthermore on that point, wanting to be a disciple of Vishnu says a lot about her, because Vishnu is about good destroying evil, restoring Dharma, and relieving the burden of the earth.

Also in the proposal scene, Charles expresses concern that Lydia needs something more stable, and Delia says Lydia is stubborn but that she just needs more time. She’s not ready to give up on Lydia.

When Charles proposes, he specifically states that he would like Delia to sign a prenuptial agreement and, obviously, become his second wife.

Delia doesn’t even hesitate. She says “You bet your ass I will!” She doesn’t care that he wants her to sign a prenup or that she’ll be his second wife.

She doesn’t consider it a competition with his deceased wife or anything like that. She just loves him so much, and I think she loves Lydia too already, and she’s so ready to become part of the family.

Right before Charles’s Very Important Dinner, he asks Delia for an update on Lydia. Maybe he had kept track of her earlier in the day, but at least for the last while, he’s left it up to Delia.

So, maybe Charles knew from checking in on Lydia previously, or from Delia if she was the one who checked in before, but Delia knows that Lydia is locked in her room and says “still” like she knows she’s been there for a long time.

Delia also tells Charles that Lydia is still locked in her room with a voice that doesn’t sound judgmental or harsh but rather concerned.

I will say, this could also simply be because Delia appears to be coming downstairs after finishing getting ready and it would have been convenient for her to check on Lydia while she was up there and that Charles could have been checking on her and was just hoping that maybe, now that the dinner is approaching, that Lydia is getting ready.

When Lydia suggests that Delia give a toast, Delia thanks her and calls her “future stepdaughter” and holds up her engagement ring, which is clearly showing off a bit, but I think she’s also genuinely excited to know that Lydia will be her stepdaughter and that she’s marrying Charles.

During her toast, Delia calls Charles an “amazing, amazing man” and at some performances, she begins to cry as she says it. She has so much love in her heart and she’s so happy.

So much of what we see of Delia has her quoting her guru, Otho.

She clearly really respects and kind of idolizes him. Before she met Charles and became like part of the Deetz family, Otho was probably the first time she felt like she belonged somewhere and wasn’t pushed away.

She repeats his quotes frequently, seeming to figure that they’re catchy and that if they worked for her, maybe they can work for other people, too.

She trusts Otho so much that when she and Charles go to try to rescue Lydia from Beetlejuice, she cancels the exorcist and calls Otho instead. She wants Lydia back and she believes Otho can do that.

On a side note of that, this woman is a true ride or die.

She doesn’t even get what’s going on. All she knows, or at least thinks she knows, is that their new house is super haunted, the ghost scared the living shit out of everyone, the ghost is clearly violent and pretty merciless, and the ghost took Lydia.

But Delia is having none of it. She believes this ghost took Lydia and Delia is ready to fight to get her back.

When Otho reveals on Beetlejuice’s spinning wheel of death that he’s not at all who he says he is, Delia calls for Beej to spin the wheel.

Obviously that’s a pretty harsh reaction, and is again played for laughs, but can show us how hurt and betrayed she feels by someone she had put so much trust and faith in.

When Juno tries to threaten Lydia after she thinks she’s gotten rid of Beej, of course everyone starts to surround Lydia and announce that Juno’s gonna have to go through them first.

Interestingly, though, and maybe it’s for staging purposes because Lydia is shorter than the other characters and they don’t want to block her, everyone gathers behind her.

Except for Delia. Delia firmly announces that she doesn’t understand anything that’s been going on but she’s a part of it, and she moves in front of Lydia, sort of on the side but closer to the side Juno is on (which I will say, again, could be for staging purposes so no one is upstaging Lydia).

Not only does she place herself in front of Lydia, (I think) she’s the only one to get in a fighting stance. She crouches and raises her arms like she’s ready to fight to protect Lydia.

Basically Delia is a ride or die who would do anything for these people she’s made her home and I think she deserves so much love

#delia #delia beetlejuice #delia deetz #beetlejuice #beetlejuice musical #beetlejuice broadway #lydia deetz #charles deetz

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totally-incorrect-theatre-quotes · 4 years

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What’s in a Name? (Fanfic)

A sweet short story about Lydia’s middle names.

Inspired by the headcanons created by me and @cowboybugman at 3am.

____________________________________________________

Nothing. It has been one week since they brought their newborn baby girl home and they had nothing to call her. They had been fighting about her name the whole pregnancy, neither of them able to agree on a single name. Charles’ suggestions were all too stuffy like it had been picked from a “how to name your daughter so she’s sure to get a husband” book written in 1542. Emily’s, well according to her husband they were all a little too out there for a child growing up in the 21st century. They agreed when the found out she was a girl that they would wait until she was born, hoping that the minute they looked at her face they would know exactly what her names was but instead when she was born they both said different names and they now had a one-week-old that was being referred to exclusively as “Baby Deetz”.

“Charles she can’t go through her whole life like this.” Emily laughed, rocking the blonde baby gently as her husband shook up a bottle for her, “She’s going to be so pissed off when she finds out we waited like six months to name her.”

“We aren’t going to wait six months! I’m pretty sure that’s illegal anyway. She’d have a name by now if you would just like one of my suggestions.”

“I can say the same thing to you!”

“For the last time, we are NOT naming her Sardonyx.”

“You’re just afraid she’ll grow up and be too powerful with a name like that.”

“No, I’m afraid that kids are going to call her Dix” Charles opened his arms and held the baby, bouncing up and down trying to get her to take the bottle. “Why can’t we name her something a little more...mainstream? I like Sarah.”

“That’s so common! She’ll have to constantly be going, no I’m not Sarah H, I’m Sarah D. No not that Sarah D, Deetz. Sarah Deetz. Take it from an Emily honey, having a basic name does you no favors in life.”

“Okay, how about a compromise.”

“A compromise?”

“Yeah, we both write a list of twenty names. Whatever name we both have written. That’s what we’re going to name her.”

Emily smiled at her husband, planting a soft kiss on both his cheek and their daughter’s forehead, “It’s deal, but what if we don’t have any of the same names?”

“Then we keep going until we do.”

“See you in an hour then. It’s your turn to get her to nap anyway.”

An hour later they met up at the kitchen table highlighters in hand as they searched through each other’s lists, their infant daughter peacefully sleeping in the bassinet next to the table. After thoroughly scanning each list there was only one name that they had both written. Close to the top of both their papers, and it was perfect.”

“Lydia Deetz.” Charles whispered, looking longingly at the sleeping baby, “That’s it. That’s her name.”

“It suits her perfectly.”

The couple held hands across the table, in awe of the whole situation. Not that it hadn’t felt real all along but now that she had a name it struck them both that she a whole person, she wasn’t just baby Deetz anymore, she was Lydia. The moment was something they would both remember for years to come, but it sadly only lasted about two minutes before Charles reminded them how she needed a middle name and the entire process started all over again. Instead of waiting another week to make it official they agreed that they would each get one name that neither person could veto. They figured middle names weren’t all that important anyway, it wasn’t what people would call her so it didn’t matter if she had two of them.

“I literally cannot believe you are going to force the name Tiffany on her.” Emily whined, she held the baby up to her husband’s face, “Look at her face. Look at her! How could you do this to a poor innocent baby?”

“I hate the name as much as you do but my family would kill me if I didn’t sneak it in there somewhere. It was my grandmother’s name and every generation someone has it. They were already mad when I told them you refused to even consider it as a first name.”

“I mean...can you blame me?”

“No I can’t which is why it is buried as a middle name. And you are one to talk, I mean where did you even come up with Calendula?”

“If you aren’t being such a jerk,” she playfully pushed her husband’s shoulder, “I would have told you that it is a sentimental name. Remember when you joined the gardening club and you fell hopelessly in love with me?”

“You mean when I joined the gardening club and you fell hopelessly in love with me?”

“ANYWAY. The first plant that you grew on your own that didn’t die was a Marigold. You gave me one of the flowers after our first date. Calendula is the scientific name for a Marigold.”

Charles blushed, “Okay, that is so sweet. I don’t even know how you remember this stuff.”

“To save in my brain for years to make you all flustered ten years later because you are in awe of how good my memory is.”

“I would agree with you there, but you forgot to grab the car seat when we were leaving the hospital.”

“And?”

“It had our daughter inside of it.”

“I’m sorry, did you spend eight months carrying and sixteen hours giving birth to said child? You could have grabbed the car seat…”

“Fair, fair. Very fair.”

“So I guess that’s settled then, no more is she baby Girl Deetz identified only by the hospital bracelet so she isn’t one of those switched at birth babies.”

“I still am shocked that we ended up with this blonde baby. Like I know my grandfather had red hair but who would have thought the light hair gene would wind up in our daughter.”

“I think her hair is perfect, just like her name. Lydia Tiffany Calendula Deetz.”

Lydia was three years old and it was early in spring where it was still a little chilly out but it was the perfect weather to go outside and get some gardening done. Emily dressed her in blue overalls and a polka-dot shirt, handed her a trowel and the two of them got to work. They planted all sorts of plants from flowers to herbs to vegetables. Lydia needed her mother’s help for most of it but she very proudly stood next to the yellow marigolds she had planted all on her own. Emily couldn’t help but smile and grab her camera, capturing the memory to preserve forever.

“You know what that flower is?” she asked the toddler

“Yellow daisy!”

“No, it’s a Marigold. They usually don’t grow in New York City but the world is always nicer with some color don’t you think sweetie?”

“Yep!”

“Did you know you were named after that flower? Calendula, it’s a very important name to me and daddy.” She sat down in the grass, pulling the squirming child into her lap despite the fact she wanted to play more in the dirt, “I think it’s your soul name. It’s different than your first name, that’s who you are but I don’t know Calendula seems like something special.”

Lydia didn’t really have a response, she was too young to understand the importance of what her mother was saying but she knew it was something nice because when Emily finished the conversation she pulled her daughter into a warm hug and whispered, “My little flower.” while stroking her curly blonde hair.

She came home from school one day in third grade with tears in her eyes. The kids at school were picking on her because she wasn’t like all the other kids. She had brought her camera and some of the pictures she had taken for one of their school projects to school that day to present to the class and all throughout the rest of the day kids were teasing her about how lame her hobby was, and they called her a creep because she was trying to take pictures during recess. One of the boys had grabbed her camera while she was trying to walk home and threw in on the sidewalk before running away. It wasn’t ruined, thankfully, but it was still broken. She knew money was a little tight and she didn’t even want to tell her parents, but her mother knew something was wrong the second she opened the door. Lydia tried to brush it off as if she just had a bad day at school but when her mom asked where her camera was she started bawling and handed the broken pieces trying to get the story out between hiccuping sobs.

“They can be so mean. I try so hard to just be their friends but they never want to play with me, nobody ever wants to sit with me. I don’t know why they don’t like me. I just want to be normal.”

“Oh, Calendula.” Emily sighed, pulling her daughter into a tight embrace while she cried. She ran her fingers through her hair, “I know it can be hard, but there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfectly amazing just the way you are and it is their loss that they are too stuck in their ways to realize how wonderful you are.”

“They think I’m strange.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being strange. I’m strange, your father is strange. We’re just… a strange and unusual family but it is a family full of love, and you, my little Marigold are so freaking full of love. You are just filled to the top of it, I don’t know how a kid this small can fit so much amazingness inside her.”

“Mom, you’re just saying that because you have to.”

“Says who?”

“I’m your daughter, you have to tell me I’m amazing.”

“Lydia, I swear I will always be honest with you. I will not hesitate to tell you when you aren’t being amazing and but that’s going to be hard. There’s only one time where I won’t think you are amazing. Do you know when that is?”

Lydia rolled her eyes, wiping away the tears from her eyes, “When?”

“When you are not being you. Promise me you’ll never pretend to be someone you aren’t. You never have to smile when you aren’t happy, you never have to hide your tears or hide your anger because that is all you. Emotions don’t make you any less you, your hobbies don’t make you any less you, because you. Lydia Deetz, are a whole complex person that has so much to offer. So who cares what some other kids say, do you like yourself?”

Lydia nodded

“Then you will always be amazing in my humble opinion.”

Lydia didn’t really tell people her middle names. She disliked Tiffany with a passion and Calendula was something that just made her feel a certain way. She didn’t hide it if people asked her she would tell them her full name but it didn’t come up often so most people didn’t know. Obviously most people just called her Lydia. Her father called her sweetheart, and her mother would normally call her some floral pet names like flower or marigold. They were cute little things that earned eye rolls or blush from the tween and early teenager Lydia, much like how other kids felt about the silly names their parents gave them.

When Emily first got sick the nicknames became more meaningful to her. Her heart would flutter when she would hear them and towards the end she craved to hear them over and over. In the last week, she wanted to be called nothing else besides Calendula. She wanted to be her mother’s little flower one more time. To be sitting in the garden where she would be told the very same story of why she got her name that her mother told every spring. She would give anything in the world to hear her mother saying her name, any name, just one more time.

The last name Emily called her daughter before she died was Lydia. Though she knew how much her daughter would have probably wanted to have been called Calendula it was important to Emily that her daughter knew that while she loved Calendula, Lydia was the name she and Charles had chosen together. That was who their daughter was.

It was two months after Emily died before she heard that name again. Her father never called her it, it didn’t feel right because it was inherently tied to Emily. Lydia never really got in trouble much either so he never had a reason to bust out the full name tactic that parents always use. Especially since the death of her mother, she was always in her room, keeping to herself, and by default staying out of trouble. But after getting a phone call from the school that Lydia had been skipping classes to hide in the library and that her grades were slipping dangerously low Charles knew that he couldn’t just let this slide like he was letting so many other things do. This was her future, she can’t ruin her life just because her mother died. If Emily were still there she would know exactly how to handle it but instead, Charles sat awkwardly at the kitchen table with Lydia’s report car folded awkwardly in his hands, waiting for her to come home from school.

“Lydia, can you please sit down here?” Charles asked when she came through the door.

She must have known what was coming because she didn’t protest, she slide the chair from the table and sat down without saying a word. She kept her eyes trained down on the ground and her father sighed, “I got a call from your school today. They told me that you’ve been skipping your therapy sessions, you haven’t been going to classes, and look I just got your report card in an email from your teachers. Lydia, you have three failing grades. You’re failing history, you’re failing math, you’re failing english. Look you ever have a C in science, I thought you really liked biology and you said that the teacher was really engaging. What is going on?”

“I don’t like that therapist dad! I told you that, I told you that months ago and you never listen to me. I tell you all the time that I can’t even get out of bed in the morning anymore so no, my grades haven’t been stellar. So sorry I haven’t been the perfect daughter you wanted me to be, I am so sorry I am such a disappointment-”

“Lydia that is not what I am saying!” He raised his voice slightly, “This is so unlike you. I know you had trouble with the kids at school in the past but this is serious now, these are your grades you are going to high school next year you can’t start slipping now or you’ll never go to college.”

“Is that all you care about! Having a kid that you can show off to all your business friends? Look how successful I am, my daughter isn’t a complete and utter failure, who cares if she hates herself she has a degree and that’s all the matters isn’t it?”

“You are being ridiculous. You are taking an issue that is now, and blowing it up to something that won’t even be a problem in the future. What we need to talk about is right now, you cannot keep skipping classes!”

“Okay dad, I promise I won’t be such a fuck-up in the future if it makes you happy.”

“Lydia-”

She jumped up from her chair, “No, no I totally get it you want me to slap a fucking smile on my face and pretend that everything is fine when it’s not!”

“Lydia-”

“I will pretend to be someone I’m NOT because that is just the kind of daughter I am. Whatever you want me to do dad, I have to make you proud don’t I?-”

“Lydia Tiffany Calendula Deetz that is ENOUGH!” He shouted.

She went silent, they both did. They stared at each other, unblinking but he could see tears welling up in her eyes but she desperately tried to fight them back. Charles wanted to reach out to her, he wanted to say..something but she quickly turned away and ran up to her room, the door slamming behind her.

He sat at the table for a long time, processing what he had just done. He didn’t apologize, but he never did it again.

Things had been rough when they first moved into the new house, a lot of crazy things had happened but after a while, the dust had finally settled and everything was starting to feel normal again. Charles was working on being a better father to Lydia, trying to be more in tune with her emotions and responding appropriately. Her fifteenth birthday was coming up in September and he wanted to give her something special, it was the first birthday without Emily here but he wanted her presence, he knew it would be good for Lydia.

He agonized for weeks over the perfect gift and finally, he knew exactly what to get her. On her birthday the whole family came together and celebrated. Cake and presents and games, by the end of the night Lydia was exhausted but so full of gratitude.

It was nearing midnight when Charles said to her, “I know it’s almost not your birthday anymore but there is one more present. I wanted to wait until after all the festivities to give it to you.”

She smiled, taking the box from his hand and shaking it gently, “What is it?”

“Open it and find out.”

Inside the box was a custom made necklace, a black and silver locket engraved with a flower on the front. She didn’t even have to hesitate, she knew it was a marigold. She opened up the locket and inside was a photo of a three-year-old Lydia standing proudly in front of a patch of marigolds she had planted in the family’s garden, on the other side a photo she had never seen before. A photo of her mother holding Lydia when she was a baby, a picnic blanket covered in marigolds beneath them. Tears were forming in her eyes and she threw herself into her father’s arms thanking him profusely and she giddily turned around so he could put it on her. She lifts up her hair that had grown past her neck now and he fastened the clasp, and Lydia positioned the pendant right above her heart.

Lydia had never told Beetlejuice her middle names. She knew that they were too powerful of a weapon, everyone in the family had a name based nickname that was used to tease them and Lydia had managed to go months without having one to use against her. She guarded her middle names, not even telling the Maitland’s but what she could have never predicted was Beetlejuice snooping around in her father’s office and finding her birth certificate. He sat on the names for weeks, knowing he couldn’t use them too soon or else they wouldn’t be as powerful.

Lydia had come home from school one day and was venting to Beetlejuice in the living room how annoying some of the popular girls at school were because all they cared about was makeup and boys and clothes. Beetlejuice was getting tired of the “I’m not like other girls” rant after about fifteen minutes and calmly, and cooly and looked her dead in the eyes and said.

“Okay, Tiffany.”

The neighbors described the following interaction as, “The sound a velociraptor makes when it is being attacked by a T-Rex trying to take the prey it had just killed.”

Lydia screamed at him she was so shocked that he even knew her middle name that she was just blind with rage. He just stood there with a smirk on his face that she wanted to claw off with her bare hands. She screamed at him so much that her voice was starting to grow hoarse, but the time Charles heard the commotion and came downstairs all he could hear with Lydia screeching, “DID YOU REALLY JUST CALL ME FUCKING TIFFANY?”

Charles froze like a deer in headlights and promptly ran off into oblivion until Lydia cooled down. Unfortunately for him she never cooled down, she simply changed targets and followed him into his office and proceeded to harras him for a solid hour about how terrible of a name Tiffany was and how insulted she was he had told Beetlejuice, even though Beetlejuice had discovered it on his own.

It became a funny thing after a while. Beetlejuice would call her Tiffany when she needed to be taken down a peg, and several other nicknames stemmed from her middle names, each falling on a delicate scale of rage-inducing to endearing nicknames. He never used Calendula though, it was awkward to pronounce and he didn’t exactly know how to use it against her in a teasing way so he often just went for shortened versions like Cal or Callie to annoy her. One day he was testing the waters though, they were in the middle of a stupid argument, it wasn’t even a real one at first, it was one of those fake arguments friends have just to pass the time and without even realizing it he says it.

“Oh, you just think that you’re proposal for weaponizing bees is SO much better than mine don’t you Calendula.”

She didn’t even register it at first, she was still laughing but the laughter quickly faded and was replaced with a gasp. She clutched instinct to the necklace around her neck, the rest of her body paralyzed in shock and a mixture of grief and anger. She could feel her chest tightening and it was becoming hard to breathe. Beetlejuice stood there, confused as to why his friend had withdrawn but before he could even properly react she ran upstairs to her room and he could hear faint sobbing coming from inside.

He waited a few minutes, wanting to give her some space while he tried to figure out what he had done wrong. She never had a problem with him calling her Cal, or Callie, or hell he even called her Candle that one time just to mess with her. He didn’t understand why this time was so different just because he used to whole name. He knocked on her door softly, and he could hear her catching her breath and trying to compose herself before she called out, “Come in.”

He sauntered in awkwardly, before plopping down on the bed next to an unusually pale

Lydia, her hands shaking while she calmed herself down.

“Kid, what happened? Was it something I said?”

She nodded, “Yeah, it’s not your fault though, I never told you. It’s just that, nobody even really called me Calendula but my mom. It was the name she picked for me, and I don’t hear it often ever since..ever since she died. I didn’t expect you to say it, and I’m not mad I just, I wasn’t prepared it hit me really hard. I’m sorry for freaking out on you.”

Beetlejuice shook his head, “You have nothing to be sorry for, I didn’t know but I’m really sorry I made you feel this way.”

She smiled at the demon and leaned her head on his shoulder while he gave her a reassuring hug from the side.

He didn’t really understand the whole having a good relationship with someone’s mother but he knew how important Emily was to Lydia, and he realized that while she was willing to put up with a lot of his playful teasing Calendula was off-limits.

Throughout her life, Lydia was given lots of little reminders of her mother’s presence in her life through her middle name. A marigold corsage for her first school dance, a marigold potted plant sat on an empty seat in the auditorium at her high school graduation, when she married Wendy she had a wildflower bouquet and marigolds braided into her hair. Emily was always there in spirit as long as there were marigolds somewhere. When she moved into her own house the first thing she planted was a flower garden with a specific kind of flower for each family member.

When she and Wendy first adopted their son Lawrence they would spend hours in the garden just pointing to them and talking about who they represented. Lawrence was three years old when Lydia had given birth to a baby girl. She had blonde hair like Lydia had when she was born, she looked like the personification of the color yellow earning her the full name of Emma Marigold Blackwood-Deetz.

Beetlejuice was surprisingly good with the kids, and his heart was completely blown away when he met Emma for the first time. He ruffled Lydia’s hair like he had while she was still a kid, looked at her and saw just how grown up she had become. He cradled her newborn daughter gently in his arms while the whole family looked on with so much love and affection. He couldn’t bring his eyes away from the infant when he said to Lydia, “Looks like you’ve got a new little marigold now.”

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monsterlovinghours · 5 years

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There’s no explanation for this. It’s just fluff. I had the idea at work and I spent my entire 7.5 hour shift thinking about it and I came home and I banged it out. Just let me be soft and self-indulgent, ok? Also they mention that time passes differently when you’re dead so to BJ it only feels like he’s been gone a month or two.

It wasn't like him to be nervous. At least, not topside. Here, he was the threat, the ominous force, the looming presence. He caused the gnawing pit in the stomach, not suffered it himself. Yet, here he was, in the same living room where it all began, chewing at his thumbnail and bouncing his knee, anxiously looking at the door. The house was different than Beetlejuice remembered, more lived in, the art actually tasteful and the walls covered in photos. It was evident that quite some time had passed since he'd left, but how much? Would Lydia still remember him? Was she even still alive? Had the Maitlands finally crossed over? What if the closest thing he'd ever had to a family was already gone?

Suddenly, the front door swung open, and a woman with dark hair pulled back into professional twist at the back of her head muttered something under her breath as she wiggled the key out of the old, sticky lock. She lifted her head and froze when she saw who was currently seated on her living room couch; or rather, floating in a seated position six inches above the cushion.

"Beetlejuice?"

His eyes widened as he got a better look at her face.

"Lyds?"

"Holy shit!" She dropped her bag and her keys, bolting across the room and throwing her arms around him; she was taller now, he noticed absently. Taller than him. "I can't believe you're here! I thought you'd left for good."

"Whoa, hold up, hold up," he muttered, holding her at arm's length and taking a closer look at her. "Fuck, kid...you look awful. Did you get old?"

She laughed. "Of course I got old, Beej. You've been gone twenty years." Her fingertips, nails painted a stylish matte black, touched her face, where maturity had softened her childish angles. He could still see the teenager he knew in her eyes, which had lost none of their sharpness or cunning, and he grinned, finally letting go of her hands. He had been relieved to feel that she was as solid as ever, as human as ever.

"So, twenty years…is that, like, a long time or something?"

Lydia laughed softly, settling down onto the couch and kicking off her shoes, revealing socks in stripes of green and black. "Long enough for me to get a PhD. in child psychology."

"Holy shit," he breathed, impressed and secretly about to burst with pride at her accomplishments. "Guess that means I gotta call you Doctor Deetz now?"

"Please don't."

Beetlejuice perched on the arm of the couch, elbows on his knees, still staring at her as if he still wasn't quite sure that she was his Lydia. "So, where's Chuckles and Diva at?"

"You mean Charles and Delia?"

"That's what I said."

"They're in Paris at the moment." She smiled and pointed to a snapshot on the wall of her father and stepmother on their wedding day. "He surprised her with a second honeymoon for their twentieth anniversary. Oh!" She stood suddenly, crossing to the foot of the stairs. "Almost forgot." Cupping a hand around her mouth, she yelled up the stairs. "Adam, Barbara! We have a guest!"

A split second later, the Maitlands appeared in the living room, phasing easily into view. Even after all this time, Beetlejuice still expected them to come running down the stairs, still clinging to the comforting limitations of being alive. He grinned, every tooth on display, as he extended his arms, as if to say here I am!

"Babs, Adam, babycakes! Didja miss me?"

He expected them to recoil, to remember the first time he had appeared to them in their living room and shrink back, but Barbara gasped and threw her arms around his neck, squeezing him so tightly he nearly choked on the breath he didn't need.

"Oh my god! You're back!"

Slowly, he hugged her back, hiding a small but genuine smile in her blonde hair. "So that'd be a yes?"

She drew back, smiling gently. "Of course we missed you. The house always seemed a little less alive with you gone."

"How's that for irony?" He snickered, then stepped back, looking between the two of them, his hands shoved in his pockets as he rocked on the balls of his feet. "Jesus, you two look exactly the same. Still a couple of boring yuppies?"

"Well, we've had to make some compromises here and there, but more or less." Adam absently fiddled with his watch, still set to the exact date and time that he had met his demise. Beetlejuice grinned and stuck out a hand, sure that while Barbara had warmed up to him, Adam was still wary. To his shock and delight, Adam took his hand, tugged on it, and pulled him into another crushing hug. He backed up once he was released, the corners of his mouth nearly touching his ears, a green tinge on his cheeks that was the closest thing to a blush he could muster.

"You, uh...you guys really embraced the whole 'forgive and forget' thing, huh?"

"Well, you did ride a sandworm into the living room to save Lydia." Barbara beamed as Lydia, hair now hanging loose around her shoulders, nodded in agreement. "And we've had a lot of time to think about everything that happened...you wanted what anyone would want, and we can't fault you for that."

"Now I feel almost bad for telling Charles to go fuck himself."

Lydia laughed, but Adam made a hushing gesture. "Mind your language around the kid, please."

"What kid? Jeez, she's gotta be nearly forty by now."

"I'm thirty-four, asshole."

"Lydia!"

"Sorry."

Barbara shook her head. "Not her." She pointed toward the stairs, that gentle smile returning to her face. "That kid."

Beetlejuice turned, his eyes widening as he saw a girl of no more than six with wide blue eyes and dark hair peering at the group of adults from between the newel posts of the banister. Lydia’s face lit up when she saw the girl, and she knelt and held out her arms.

“Hey, bug!”

The girl grinned and ran to her, wrapping her small arms around Lydia’s neck as she straightened and spun, swinging her in a wide circle. Once she was on her feet, the girl looked up at Beetlejuice, regarding him curiously. Lydia, positively glowing with pride, placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder.

“This is Chloe. My daughter.”

His jaw nearly hung to the floor. For the first time in perhaps his entire existence, he was speechless, albeit momentarily. He looked to Lydia, to Adam, to Barbara, then back down to the girl, who was staring just as intently back at him. “I’m an uncle?! Why didn’t anyone tell me?!”

“You were gone,” Barbara said softly. “And we wanted her to be...well, used to ghosts before we introduced you two.”

Lydia sighed, picking Chloe up even though she seemed almost too big to be held. “She’s adopted, Beej. My fiancee and I got the papers finalized a couple of years ago, and she’s been getting used to life here. Adam and Barbara have been amazing help; you have no idea how happy I was when I brought her home and she immediately asked who the blonde lady was.” Turning her head, she pressed a quick kiss to her daughter’s cheek. “Clo, do you remember when you first came home? I told you stories about my friend BJ?” She nodded. “That’s him.”

Chloe fearlessly reached for his tie, lifting it to study the pattern. “Are you a ghost too, like Aunt Barbie and Uncle Adam? Can I call you Uncle BJ?”

Beetlejuice grinned, unable to help himself. “I’m the ghost with the most, squirt. And yeah, that’s fine and definitely not the weirdest thing I’ve been called,” he answered. Dropping the tie, Chloe echoed his smile and held out her arms. “Uh…” His hands twitched at his sides, as if he wanted to take her but didn’t quite trust himself.

“It’s alright, you can hold her.” Lydia smiled. “She’s mostly out of her biting phase by now.”

Snickering, he let the girl clamber onto him, helping her onto his back where she immediately wrapped her limbs around him. “So. You’re a doctor, you got a kid, and you’re getting hitched? Christ, kid, you’ve been busy.” He playfully knocked her arm with his elbow. “So, who’s the lucky guy?”

Adam and Barbara exchanged a knowing look in the beat before Lydia answered. “Her name is Lexie.” His brows shot up and his grin widened, but he said nothing else. “She’ll be home soon, I’m sure she’d love to meet you.”

“Really?” His smile fell a bit. “Does, uh...does she know the whole story?”

“She knows the important parts.” Lydia leaned against the banister, watching her daughter attempting to untangle a knot from Beetlejuice’s hair. “She knows that you saved my life twice, and that you saw me and understood me when no one else did. She knows you were my friend.”

“She also knows that you kissed me,” Adam added, and all of them stifled a laugh.

“So,” Beetlejuice started, unsure if what he was feeling now was hope or fear, “you guys...you’re okay with me sticking around?”

Lydia glanced over at the Maitlands, who shrugged and nodded. “For as long as you want,” she answered. The smile that before he had tried to hide now resurfaced, unable to be suppressed as he realized that yes, that sickening turning in his gut had to be hope. Despite everything he’d put them through, even after all this time, the Maitlands could look past the lies and Lydia could look past the betrayal. After all he’d done, they forgave him and made a place for him.

“Uh, Beej?”

“Yeah?” He looked down to see that he was floating approximately three feet off the ground, Chloe still tugging at his hair, seemingly oblivious to her sudden change of altitude.

“Can you bring my kid back down?”

“No.”

“BJ, I’m serious.”

“Nope. She’s my kid now.”

#beetlejuice #beetlejuice the musical #pure fluff #also lydia is a grief counselor who specializes in helping children cope with death #and you can pry that headcanon from my cold dead hands #let beej be loved and accepted goddammit #b**tleb*bes dni #edited

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