therealvinelle

[therealvinelle]

Tbh I’ve never read Harry Potter but these posts got me even more confused then before I knew anything

Well, remember mine and @thecarnivorousmuffinmeta are blogs where we take canon to the Watsonian extreme, and sometimes just wing it. Very little of what can be found on our blogs is what the author intended.

#about this blog #the carnivorous muffin

[therealvinelle]

Alphard being horrified by Tom being so casual about riding the bus sent me. did he ever figure out what he meant or to this day is he confused.

The Man Who Would Be King by me and @therealvinelle

He did eventually figure out or surmise that buses in the Wizarding World and Muggle world are very different things.

#my fic #the man who would be king #the carnivorous muffin #the carnivorous muffin fic

[therealvinelle]

I remember us sitting on Messenger during quarantine and getting hyperfixated on Twilight, and overanalyzing until we were blowing the case wide open with "Aro... IS A GOOD GUY". Fun times, and no going back after.

But yes, prior to that I personally was a normie, I remember there were odds and ends I'd question from time to time but on first reading the books as a child I was a Bella/Edward shipper.

I don’t know if you’ve ever answered a question like this before, but what was your first impression of the volturi ? On the first read did you have similar thoughts as you do now or were you kinda taking them at face value (ie bella’s/edward’s opinions)

Similar thoughts to now? Oh hell no, this was ages ago anon and I wasn't thinking that hard then.

As it is this is so long ago, ages ago, that from what I remember--

Well, I didn't think about them much and I actually thought it was a bit odd how they'd show up for two seconds at the end of the book. For me at the time, the plot was clearly about Bella and Edward and while these guys were interesting it wasn't really about them. They were the NPCs we saw for two seconds and then they went away again.

But they were in the part of New Moon where Edward comes back and plot starts happening again and I went "Thank fucking god" as Bella being depressed for six months was... not thrilling.

I do remember thinking that they weren't really... traditional villains. It never felt like they were out to get Bella specifically. The mess that follows is more about the Cullens and is painted as a clear powerplay that's not really that personal. Which was probably not the impression I was supposed to get.

You, @therealvinelle?

#about us

[therealvinelle]

Was reading an old post about the Cullens being too broke to manufacture needles before Alice and now I'm wondering- with the Cullens being stupidly rich would Carlisle want to use some of those resources to better humanity? (I can't imagine any of the other Cullens caring enough)

My tag on the Cullens + money money money.

As it is I don't recall having said the Cullens were too broke to manufacture needles and have to wonder if I have been misinterpreted, would you mind linking this to me?

Where charity is concerned, I seem to recall there being some canon lore about the Cullens giving money, but I doubt that's Carlisle specific and I also doubt they feel that "give money to feel like a good person" compulsion, especially when giving large amounts to charity would mean explaining where this large amount came from. While I'm sure they already have a money laundering scheme in place (can't buy a house, cars, clothes with money you're not supposed to have, and can't be a person who has money if your current identity only popped into existence six months ago) it would still be an extra ordeal to launder however much cash they want for the purposes of whichever charity they're wanting to give to.

As it is they canonically keep a lot of their money in cash form, implying much of their money is unlaundered.

Lastly we already have Carlisle working at a hospital with low pay (per Charlie's "He could be making 3x what he's making here if he moved to a big city"), so he might not be a Doctors Without Borders man but he's making a meaningful difference.

TLDR: if canon says they give to charity I'll cede to that, but I don't think it's much.

#twilight #twilight meta #twilight renaissance #twilight headcanons #twilight economics #cullens

[therealvinelle]

Not that anon but idk I always figured that the residents of Forks thought the Cullens were a cult and that was part of the reason they stayed away

Anon is referring to this post.

I doubt it. If that rumor was going around, Jessica would have included it in her rundown on the Cullens to Bella.

Failing that, Edward would have picked up on it. We see in Midnight Sun that he is always monitoring people for their impressions of the Cullens and can disappoint Emmett by telling him they have no scandalous theories. Even if we put limited stock in how useful Edward's surveilling actually is, I don't think he could have missed this - "I wonder if he's in a cult" will be the first thing people think when they see him after hearing the rumor or getting the idea, nothing of the kind has occurred.

#twilight #twilight renaissance #twilight meta #cullens

[therealvinelle]

The Man Who Would Be King is such a delight! I've reread it thrice and it's make my MotherKiller brain worms worse.

What actress would you want to portray Lily?

Thank you!

Look, @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin, praise!

We'd cast Jodie Foster, no competition. She has that doe-eyed fragile but determined look, there's a quiet fierceness to her. One could say she made such an impression in her role as Clarice Starling.

@theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin, any other contenders?

#my fic #praise #the carnivorous muffin #the carnivorous muffin fic

[therealvinelle]

Seeing as I once asked a physicist friend about this: Edward appears to have good thermal conductivity (ability to transfer heat). If he didn't, he would not feel so cold to the touch.

He is cold for the same reason why a slab of metal and pile of cloth in the same room will feel very different in temperature to the touch: one transfers heat easily from your finger, the other doesn't. Which in theory means Edward can get very hot, he just needs an external source of heat.

Okay so I read that anon ask about Bella using Marcus as a dildo and do you think Thermal Transfer applies to vampire or did Marcus just stay ice cold in Bella the entire time?

I can't believe we know the answer to this canonically but we do.

It does, Bella reports that Edward will warm up if she spends enough time cuddling him. This is what happens in the meadow. (Similarly, this is why Bella gets cold touching Edward, all her heat be going to him.)

#twilight #twilight meta #twilight renaissance #twilight vampires #the carnivorous muffin #thecarnivorousmuffinmeta

[therealvinelle]

In the twilight universe, do you think anyone has formed cults?

Canonically, yes they have. Look no further than to Amun, part of the coven which made the humans worship them as a pantheon of gods and who is commemorated even thousands of years later. Or Vladimir and Stefan, who lament that the Volturi ruined things for them so they can't make the humans worship them any longer.

There's no mention of vampire cults, though, if anything the response people have to the Cullens indicate they don't have a social pattern where cults often happen.

The Cullens follow strict rules, have a charismatic leader, engage in a diet that weakens them but consider it a privilege, they live in a very unusual way, they are not a cult (they're just weird) but if there were vampire cults I think it would come up. Some type of "Ahaha Carlisle you remind me so much of Charlespire Vampson" "Please don't say that :/" passing remark, or an anecdote.

I imagine the Volturi are the ones to thank or there not being a lot of fertile ground for cults. If you get too many vampires too hyped around an idea, the result is going to be bad for humans and for peace in the vampire world in general. Same hammer as with the newborn wars comes crashing down, except there tellingly isn't a specific law against it. We instead have laws that overlap with what a cult creation would indicate, such as "don't create too many vampires at once", "no public spectacles", "failure to report law-breaking to the Volturi will result in the same punishment as the law-breaker".

#twilight #twilight worldbuilding #twilight renaissance #twilight meta #twilight vampires #cults

[therealvinelle]

Do you think Tom knows how to drive a car or would he see it as redundant given that he can literally teleport?

I don't think he would.

When he did live Muggle, he was extremely poor, a child, and in the city. The likelihood of him having gotten a car to interact with and learn how to drive is very small.

After that point, there's really not a need and all it does is introduce needless risk into his life. If he wants to get from A to B he can do so instantaneously, if he wants to enjoy the scenery he can fly.

For a guy that doesn't use broomsticks I just don't see him being enamored with cars/going out of his way to learn how to drive them.

#harry potter #harry potter meta #harry potter headcanon #tom riddle #the carnivorous muffin #thecarnivorousmuffinmeta

[therealvinelle]

assuming Harry died in the graveyard in book 4 as planned what was voldemorts original plan to do next do u think?

I think we saw the gist of it in canon.

He laid low, let those who believed a long dead dark wizard had somehow resurrected himself look like fools and conspiracy theorists, and quietly went about rebuilding his movement. He waited to jailbreak his Death Eaters until enough time had passed that it'd wouldn't be immediately connected to his supposed resurrection, and he kept his followers in a tight leash, not making any headlines of any kind.

Consider all that he had to rebuild.

There had been a purge of Death Eaters, Death Eaters sympathizers, and everyone remotely affiliated with him after he fell, the Wizengamot was fast tracking people to Azkaban. Those who escaped wouldn't be rushing to incriminate themselves either.

All his spies, all his agents, his entire network where nobody had known who was or wasn't with him, was shattered, and he was starting worse than scratch because last time, people hadn't known what was coming. This time, he was looking at an uphill battle on every front - rallying sympathy to the cause of the most feared man in modern history is still possible, people can always be convinced what they've heard was wrong and Voldemort has been the victim of merciless slander, but it requires more work. Recruitment when he looks like evil and inhuman and he can't really run the charm offensive anymore, also possible but so much harder than before. Infiltrating the Ministry, amassing political power, again still possible but the thing is he already did this and the people he used then have largely been purged and those who weren't have wisened up.

The second his resurrection is acknowledged, the wizarding world goes into a panic. And as it happens, this worked out wonderfully for Tom since nobody had learned from last time, so rather than wise up they dipped right into crisis mode and restored the social power and influence of a man who had been a wraith for fourteen years after death by failed baby slaughter took him out.

I have to think Tom was surprised by that.

His actions in Half-Blood Prince through the start of Deathly Hallows where he esssentially puts the gradually amass power plan on speed and within the year he's committed a coup, reads to me as a response to that. No point being insidious in those circumstances, in fact he can't without risking that the spell will break and people start wondering just what he's doing.

#voldemort #tom riddle #harry potter #harry potter meta #harry potter headcanons #harry potter worldbuilding

[therealvinelle]

Would the Volturi stop aliens from invading the planet if they could and do you think Aro has done this in the past

Are the aliens a threat to humans?

If so, yes. There's even precedent.

If not, though, or if vampires can feed from the aliens fine, then the aliens get left alone. (Though given the aliens are invading the planet, I imagine the Volturi have to take action on this one)

#twilight renaissance #already answered #if you tilt your head a bit that is

[therealvinelle]

Alec Guinness is also a hot contender, but the vote ultimately fell on Shariff.

pureblood supremacy aside, it's actually kind of sad that Alphard actually understands muggles better than others who proudly claim they're progressive

like say Dumbledore. or Arthur Weasley

he's such a fascinating character. I think one of my favourite characters you've both created.

I forgot if this has been answered but what actor would you want to portray him?

Oooh, look, @therealvinelle, praise!

Arthur in particular is bad, I want to be somewhat nice to him (I know, on this blog? Perish the thought) and say that he didn't have enough exposure to Muggles to know the difference except that he does have that exposure through fellow Order members like Lily Evans and then later through Harry and Hermione. He does at least ask them questions but him gutting a car and then enchanting it to say how cool the car is without understanding anything of how the car works and appreciating it...

It's bad.

Dumbledore's slightly better than Arthur (which is bad because it's Arthur's actual job) but he gives the air of being self assured in what he knows and therefore believing he knows more than he actually does (the blase response when London was being bombed and Tom wanted to stay in Hogwarts during the summer was... telling)

Alphard's helped a long way by having a) an extremely close relationship with a Muggle-born where Tom did not put up with this shit and b) he likes old books. A lot. He likes really old books. A lot.

You want the classics, Alphard's your guy.

And yes, we really like him too.

And nope, we haven't done face cast and at least very late at night when I got this we both said "Omar Shariff". So. Alphard's stupid hot but for some reason no one realizes it.

#my fic #the carnivorous muffin #the carnivorous muffin fic #fic meta

[therealvinelle]

Let's say, if different covens in Twilight have to control an airplane via typing "look up," "look down," "reverse," etc in twitch chat, but the rule is 1. one coven, one plane 2. they can use their gifts and they can communicate I guess, good luck communicating when they have to spam words in chat lol 3. the plane needs to stay in the air for at least 30 seconds and then they have to bring the plane down safely 4. if their airplane collides, they will immediately respawn with a new one it will be something like this link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QIacthT6c84&ab_channel=DougDoug Which coven's airplane successfully lands safely?

Without gifts:

The Volturi.

Aro, Caius, and Marcus worked so well together they were able to do the impossible and take over the vampire world, establishing a new world order, if anybody can copilot an airplane it's those three.

With gifts:

The Cullens.

They have Edward reading Alice's mind as Alice sees how they should do this, and Jasper keeping everybody calm and focused. They land the plane quickly and well enough to make the record board.

Also successful coven:

The Irish coven.

Siobhan really wants them to land the plane safely and what do you know, they do. Amazing coincidence, that.

#twilight #twilight renaissance #twilight meta #twilight headcanons #volturi #cullens #irish coven

[therealvinelle]

Can confirm.

*slides you a cookie* any chance we could get some info on what secret fic is about?

Endless roasting of @therealvinelle, with a small break, and then more roasting of @therealvinelle

#secret fic

[therealvinelle]

Must add that plum is a great color, it just looks swanky even though we don't feel as strongly about dyes as we once did. Would you have the Wizengamot wear beige, anon?

omg i just saw a quote from the trial scene of order of the phoenix describing the wizengamot and it says they are all wearing plum-colored robes which i totally forgot. cannot believe alphie had been rocking some awesome plum colored robes every time he shows up to his wizengamot duties. very iconic of him. bet tom is 1) lowkey judging the color choice 2) extremely jealous bc inherited seats aren't fair.

To be fair, plum colored falls in line with purple being a traditionally regal color (due to the uber expense of the dye) so it along with cardinal red aren't very surprising colors for a very formal governing body with a long history and a lot of wealth to have.

Tom might judge Alphard but Alphard would just look at him funny and have no idea what he's on about.

This is just what the Wizengamot wears, and what's wrong with purple?

#the carnivorous muffin #the carnivorous muffin fic #my fic #fic meta #amulette d'amour

[therealvinelle]

What is the largest vampire population possible before they get exposed?

Relevant post in which I calculate how many vampires exist in canon.

I think this might already be answered by canon, in that vampires have expanded as much as they can before the population control that is the Volturi struck.

Any given vampire who wishes to survive, must either find his own hunting territory or join up with others. If he chooses the former, he can either find unclaimed territory, kill those already there, or strike up a deal that those already there will relinquish some of their territory to him. If he chooses the latter, he will either find a coven with sufficient territory that one more vampire makes no difference, in which case the coven can continue accepting members (or relinquishing territory to neighbors) until they are at capacity, or his newfound coven will expand their territory.

All this to say: there is a limit to how many humans can be hunted at any one time before the Volturi will react, and the number of vampires in the world will naturally fall to somewhere around that limit. Sometimes just over it, at which point the hammer falls and we're under it, then the number creeps up again.

In my linked post I estimated 150 vampires at the lowerst and 500 at the highest. 150 vampires gives a minimum of 3900 people killed by vampires per year, assuming each vampire eats one person every fortnight, 500 vampires gives a minimum of 13000 people killed per year. Those 13000 people are 0.0001 of the world's population, the human race can survive just fine without- trouble being each of these deaths must go by without questions being asked. Spread across the world, evenly distributed throughout the year, in a world where disappearance and murder rates have always been higher than they are in our non-Twilight world, that's doable- but I think any more and we'd be at the pain limit, not to mention the Volturi would be stretched too thin keeping ~500 vampires in check.

So, I stand by my estimate in the linked post of 150 at the lowest and 500 at the very highest, likely someplace in between.

#twilight mathematics #twilight renaissance #twilight meta #twilight headcanons #twilight vampires #twilight worldbuilding

[therealvinelle]

Not that anon but do you think Aro sometimes would braid his hair, just a simple elegant braid down his back. If this is true do you think Carlisle would admire the way it would look against his back and end at his tailbone

You know, sure.

The invention of hairties ushered in a new era for Aro, it's great.

#twilight #twilight renaissance #aro