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Logos, Mary Oliver /// I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well, James Allen Hall /// Hey Rosey, The National /// You with the Crack Running Through You, Kim Addonizio /// #319, asofterworld.com (remixed) /// yes & no, Natalie Wee /// Ceasefire, S.T. Gibson

#head in my hands emotions in my heart thoughts in my head I am so fucked up on this #garashir #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #julian bashir #elim garak #thinking...... about how important 'I'm not afraid of you' is mutually in this pairing. #like the more truth they manage to show each other slowly and ardously the more important that fundamental truth is #and the first one captures something about the tone in asit so well. augh these are some QUOTES OP!!!

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Blades of the Cavalier Primaries Displayed for your Appreciation

In house order from top to bottom. I’d be happy to explain the choices if anyone is interested!

#oh these rule #the locked tomb #gideon the ninth

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garak would never judge julian for having an emotional support teddy bear because when garak was fifteen he had an emotional support pet lizard (which he named after his mum despite it being a boy lizard. still not over that) and talking to it like a crazy person was loadbearing to his sanity. I feel that maybe even more so than anyone else, he'd Get It. and I just think that's beautiful

#just thinking about that part in asit where garak is like 'oh mila the regnar we're really in it now' again. im love him so much?? #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #elim garak #garashir #julian bashir

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A CITY RAZED OH, TO BURY YOU BENEATH IT THE BEST ENDURE WITH THE DEAD, OUR TRUE BELIEVERS

#yesssss such a good harrow! #the locked tomb #harrowhark nonagesimus

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Especially the lies.

#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #garashir #julian bashir #elim garak

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#*agonized weeping* #a grief with no cure no limit no measure could serve as the TL;DR of his whole life honestly #star wars #obi wan kenobi

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in my head the star wars equivalent of tswift is some human woman named tay’lor spiff or something and her stans are losing their minds over theories that she’s secretly a jedi singing about the horrors of war, even though she’s from a neutral system that hasn’t seen so much as a moral panic in 50 years

#this is the most 'I can't believe it's not campaign star wars podcast'-ass post I've ever seen #spiritually if not factually there's a whole dear mynock dedicated entirely to the crew's thoughts on tay'lor spiff out there #star wars #campaign star wars #who would be the resident spiff fan on the mynock. leenik? tryst? tryst at least loves a good conspiracy I could see it on that level #of the bluebird crew I think none of them are spiffies they are all too insufferable about not being into mainstream things #but blue imagines he's in a rivalry with her. like musically. (this is extremely untrue she doesn't even know who he is) #or perhaps even funnier possibility: synox is a spiffy. he refuses to elaborate. the rest of them lose their minds about it

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My favorite thing about Chief O'Brien is he's absolutely Not. Just some guy. Like not even a little. He's the reason this station is up and running he fixes every problem and is very intelligent but he doesn't want to be distinguished Starfleet Officer man. He just wants to be some guy. He went to DS9 bc he knew no one would care if he excelled there, he could be properly challenged and prevent the station from blowing up all while clocking out at 5pm and going home to his beautiful wife and children except for his weekly boys night with Julian. His universe said oh a man of your talents could definitely go down in history and he said "🤚absolutely not ✋ I'm gonna use my self-sealing stembolts to stop my silly little warp core breaches, get paid, raise my family, and then die. That's it." And that's so valid of him.

#he's trying so desperately to live uninterestingly in interesting times. he's trying so hard to cling to the safety of side characterdom. #but alas. the narrative. it knows where he lives. #and yet is his struggle against it not in itself a noble one #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #miles o'brien

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hey, look who 💖💖

#these are so fucking good #the locked tomb #griddlehark #gideon nav #harrowhark nonagesimus #palamedes sextus #camilla hect

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I am a ruined vessel of sorrow and regret, but I am free.

#ohhhhhhhhh #mass effect

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iron bull sketches

#secretly the most interesting man in all of thedas there he is!!! #dragon age #iron bull #these are so nice I love the way the expressions are captured

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patented 'not that I care that much or anything so there's no need to dwell on it too too much ahaha *sweats nervously* but tain would you pls consider not murdering my mom (and the mother of your child) for absolutely no reason whatsoever? no pressure tho of course you know best! :)' smile

(it's so dark but also so funny that when tain keeps on Hinting Ominously, garak's reaction seems... slightly exasperated? more than anything, under all the tension fsdjafsl. this exact conversation has definitely happened multiple times over the last thirty years, lending horror an edge of 'oh this again huh' ennui and hilarity. 'I should have killed your mother before you were born'/'so you've told me, many times'. I think it's the turnaround time from 'I've missed you, Elim' to this that drives it from straightforward psychological horror sneaking dread to still that but also kind of hilarious. it really took tain less than five minutes to go there didn't it. wow. well, actually. I think maybe the real horror part is that garak still loves him and doesn't know how to stop. somewhere in there is a five year old whose heart is a desperate stupid little moth and his father is a ruinous forest fire in the night, brighter and closer than any star. of course it burns you to touch it that's just what love is, right. *spots a smiling julian bashir in the loading bay holding a box of chocolates out of the corner of his mind and experiences something harrowing and existential he simply cannot unpack right in this moment thank you* right???)

#the tain household is a very very dark comedy if you squint at it just right. also a tragedy and a horror of course #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #elim garak #garashir #yeah it got in there I just can't help myself. in my defense that's all right there in the ep lol #his expressions and body language in this whole scene. a gold mine #he's so still and controlled most of the time (in the 'don't eat me' way) and there are moments where he suddenly looks much much younger #you just know he looked at tain exactly like this when he was five when he was fifteen when he was twenty five #and also the half light half dark lighting across his face doing its thing -- man what a good two parter this is

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#hello hello for god's sake hello #stargate atlantis #mcshep #rodney mckay #john sheppard #stargate #if you weren't here for my sga years... count yourself lucky there was some great insanity afoot for me at that time #(I do miss that particular insanity dearly. not anything else that was going on for me to be clear but I miss sga very much) #this is so beautiful........

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he is so easy to draw

#drawing jigen is one of those things that rise from deep in the soul. pencil to paper and there he is. hat. hair. cig. long long legs #add desired level of skrunkle (the more the better is my stance). and there he is. that's the jig #lupin iii #daisuke jigen

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Garashir ficlet, PG, context is that Garak is about to go do… Something on his own (specifics very much ????? but probably something foolhardy and secretive and doomed ala Improbable Cause) and Julian is Not Having It this time. Probably fits into some of the later seasons vibes-wise. 

Julian said tightly: “My Kardasi might still need some work, but — ”

“Oh, no at all, considering how recently you started your studies your efforts are downright impressive, if, ah — charmingly archaic at times. If that’s to be laid at anyone’s feet it should be mine, probably, remind me to recommend you something written within the last few centuries sometime soon.” 

Giving this attempt at diversion exactly as much consideration as it deserved, Julian completely ignored him and finished his own line of thought: “ — but at this point I have a veritable doctorate in Garakese. There’s something you’re not telling me.” 

“Many things, I’m sure. If I’d known you had any interest in the optimal soil composition in which to grow Lovalan roses, I would have gladly shared my insight. All you had to do is ask, my dear. In the spirit of cross-cultural knowledge exchange, I always stand ready to chip in and do my par — ”

“Elim.” 

That made Garak blink, just that split second too long, even as his face remained perfectly still and smiling around it. It was subtle enough that an unaugmented eye might not have caught it, but Julian’s did.

No longer bothering to hide his own desperation, Julian pressed on: “Elim, please. You’ve got me worried with this. I want to help in any way I can, and — and I don’t like to think about what might happen if I can’t.”

There was a moment of silence between them in which Julian could hear his own quickened breathing too loudly in his ears. 

“That’s… characteristically kind of you, Doctor,” Garak said eventually, voice slightly hushed, like someone trying not to wake a sleeping child in another room. “But there is nothing to worry about. Really.” 

“Brush me off if you really feel like you have to, but please, at least do me the courtesy of not going out of your way to insult my intelligence while you’re at it,” Julian snapped. “How stupid do you think I am? How do you expect me to just close my eyes and sit back like nothing’s wrong while you — ”

Garak sighed. “You’re right, that was unworthy of me. Please, put it down to old habit, not a lack of respect. Very well, then let me rephrase what I was trying to say slightly, in order to be more precise — whatever might or might not be going on, there’s absolutely nothing you can do, and I really would rather you stayed out of it. Knowing you to be safely out of the line of fire would provide me with infinitely more comfort and utility than anything you could actively do to help. Which, again, is nothing.”

“But — ”

“Julian. Please.” 

Julian would have been thrown less off-balance if Garak had punched him square in the jaw. “Oh, that’s a dirty trick,” he said, unsteadily. 

“And here I thought ‘turnabout is fair play’ was a guiding Human principle,” Garak said, and his tone was light but his eyes were soft and very sad. “I see I have been misinformed.”    

The idea that Julian’s initial exposure to the Cardassian language leaves him speaking it like the equivalent of a Regency era novel or something to contemporary Cardassian ears in the beginning is a headcanon that is so dear to me  

#garashir #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #julian bashir #elim garak #my writing #god. I just started a new fic this evening. I've got 5 proper wips on the go now not just this style of fragment nonsense. help

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Mercymorn!! My awful queen 💖

#she's everything to me #the locked tomb #mercymorn the first

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thinking about the recurring theme of sisko being someone who constantly comes adrift in time, literally and metaphorically, physically and emotionally. no matter how much he wants to stay here, and how hard he tries to, he drifts, he comes unmoored. you exist here. and always existing here means he can't exist there simultaneously; one precludes the other. and the grief of that truth that rings like a bell through his whole existence at once. hm.

#they keep sending this man into wibbly wobbly timey vimey space and it's so unfair! he just wants to be *here* with the people he loves... #star trek #star trek ds9 #ds9 #benjamin sisko #oh captain my captain...