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So we all know that Tumblr is US-centric. But to what degree? (and can we skew the results of this poll by posting it at a time where they should be asleep?)

Reblog to increase sample size!

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Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

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#only reblogging bc I almost voted some other quote #and it’s not a specific quote I remember so much as the moment #where they try to arrest him and he basically goes ‘no I don’t want to :)’ and keeps walking #very silly and embodies a lot of his personality outside of The Trauma

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I’ll be honest I think both of them are ace but the sheer psychic damage this inflicted on me is too good not to pass on

you know i'm thinking about how few teeth gollum has and like do you think frodo ever got a good sloppy bj from him

#to all my mutuals seeing this #:)

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had a vision for samfro modern au where Gollum is Frodo's ugly weird wrinkly fucking cat that hates Sam...

#I fucking love the Gollum is a wrinkly cat sentiment that pops up over and over in this fanbase #like correct #gollum is

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Breaking news: giant reptilian monsters spotted climbing all over Chicago landmarks!

This month's CHS Junior Herpers (a reptile club for kids that I run) was all about movie monsters. We talked about reptiles in the film industry and then I showed the kids how to use miniature sets and low angle photography to make their little friends look like giants. The ball python had a little trouble, but his owner was super pleased. CC the crested gecko was easily our best actor- he loved our bridge sets. The kids had a blast casting their creatures in a hypothetical movie.

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Moquella haliguy

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Please help the family of a non-verbal autistic child (who has been losing weight because he only eats certain kinds of food, largely unavailable during this time) leave Gaza!

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Considering once again writing an essay for fun

#this time it will be abt lotr and sexual assault/harassment #when I say the ring is a wedding ring I so so mean it #yeah dude take this gold band with poetry inscribed it’s not like that’s historically signalled partnership or anything #surely the soul binding magic of this ring won’t do anything odd to you. not at all

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I think I’m going to think about this youtube comment forever

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sex is like dark souls. difficult to master. easy to kill yourself on accident. patches is there

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I think the world is ready....

For muppet Smeagol.

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i know i should be ignoring these but i can’t

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Rice Krispies smartest decision is by far their Treat. Turning their cereal into a strange brick relies on the natural fact that all children are hopelessly dependent upon the ingot.