chillabuse

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i'm like a stray dog in a lot of ways but i will not elaborate on that

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yes girl I think it’s incredibly sexy how indecisive you are about every single decision in your life. I also love how you haven’t let anything go since you were 12. can we make out now

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You still have time to change!

(Words sewn into a leaf)

#recovery #been actively making music lately which is fun!

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there’s a special kind of sadness that seems to come with spring

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i made your favorite dish. i made you something you’ve never tried before. i love you. i spent twenty minutes chopping. my grandmother made this for me when i was little. i made this dairy free for you. i love you. i want to eat together. the onions made me cry. i love you. i learned this recipe for you. i love you. i made this special for your birthday. i love you. i know you don’t like peppers. i love you. i love you. i love you.

#literally me #lovesick #ab me

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there’s a misconception that grief only happens when we lose people. this is not true. we can grieve circumstances, relationships, missed opportunities. in fact, sometimes when you find yourself plagued with waves of emotion from sadness to melancholy you may be grieving yourself. the version of yourself that you might have been if things had been different, or if only you had said something, or if someone had stood up for you.

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Natalie Wee, Least of all

#yearn #lovesick

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uhhh yh sure u can go back but no one will be waiting for you there

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Sylvia Plath, from The Collected Poems of Sylvia Plath; "Three Women,"

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i think i love you, which is odd, because i promised myself i couldn't love anything that breathes - on account of a sense for the dramatic and also one time i got thrown against the ground so hard that the splatter was chalk dust. i said i'd never let that happen standing up. it happened like a sunrise anyway, between the fingers over my eyes. you flew as a bird and made a nest in my heart. i want it to pass over me like a locust. my hands keep shaking. anything close can cut through bone. like looking down a deep hole, i hear the stones skitter over and plunge. i wanna be an adult about this and instead i feel like crying. this will only make things worse. i wasn't supposed to do this again. what a fool, this girl.

it's like she wants to get hurt.

#lovesick #yearn

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I think any inanimate thing you regularly care for becomes a little alive.

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@roach-works // Melissa Broder, "Problem Area" // Mary Oliver, "The Return" // @annavonsyfert // Koyoharu Gotouge, Demon Slayer // Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance // David Levithan, How They Met and Other Stories // Tennessee Williams, Notebooks

#recovery #I think

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little update: my hair was long and now it's not

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going insane

#losing my mind #lovesick #yearn

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familiar things

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"heaven sent" filet crochet (inspo) - do not repost

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love changes you